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Guest The Superstar

The Road to Anglemania II - 2/22/03

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Guest The Superstar

OAOAST Presents…

 

THE ROAD TO ANGLEMANIA II

 

February 22, 2003.

 

Pyro goes off and the crowd goes crazy as we are coming to you live…it’s the debut of the ROAD TO ANGLEMANIA~! We head down to ringside, with your hosts for this extravaganza, none other than the top B-Show analysts, Michael Cole and The Coach!

 

coleandcoachman.jpg

 

Cole: Hello everyone, and welcome to The One and Only Anglesault Thread’s Road to Anglemania II! We have a great card for you today, including a debut match from Andrew “Your Hero” Hyland! Mr. ZsasZ hosts his much-anticipated Think Tank, and…

 

“THE DEVIL IS A DJ!” blasts over the sound system. The abruptness of it all makes everyone in the arena freeze, and when the lights are cut and replaced by various laserlights and strobes, some patrons are sent into epilleptic seizures. A dark figure can be made out inside the ring amidst all the optical wizardry, and a pair of glowing... sticks appear and begin to make all kinds of intricate designs and patterns in mid-air, one green, one blue. They spread out to a wider field, and the lights are turned up to reveal a young man in the ring with small chains whirling these sticks about. He transfers both chains to his left hand and asks for a microphone with his right.)

 

Coach: It’s Kotzenjunge, man! Kotzenjunge is here! Sweet!

 

Kotzenjunge: Cut the music, if you please.

 

(the music ends, and the crowd gets a moment or two of pause to take this recently-debuted wrestler in. He’s dressed in a flamboyantly designed button-up shirt, and wearing black cargo pants. He has Buddy Holly glasses, and a Lincoln beard with wild hair. He goes to speak again.)

 

Kotzenjunge: Hello to all of my American friends here and in the OAOAST!

 

(he had a British accent. The crowd instinctively boos.)

 

Kotzenjunge: Now now, just give me a moment to speak. I have come here from Britain for the best of competition, as brawling in clubs just isn’t the thing for me anymore, I want something a bit more legit and lucrative. I heard of this OAOAST through the internet and figured I’d come here so I could prove my superiority over your best and brightest just as I did in London’s underground.

 

(the crowd puts two and two together and starts chanting)

 

Crowd: RAVES ARE GHEY! RAVES ARE GHEY! RAVES ARE GHEY!

 

Kotzenjunge(suddenly enraged): And that is exactly why I was prompted to come here in the first place! You bastards have NO respect for the electronic culture!

I’m here to make a statement, and I’m not leaving until I get a match with one of your OAOAST “athletes!”

 

(he even makes the quotation marks in the air. Now about ten jobbers come from the locker room to get this person out of the ring while the crowd continues to chant.)

 

Kotzenjunge: Oh, this is the best you can come up with? Please, ten spotty twerps against someone of my caliber isn’t worth the sweat off my arse! But, if you insist...

 

(he waits for them to get to ringside, then shoots off the opposite ropes and hits a plancha on the group of jobbers! They all go tumbling down, and Kotzenjunge managed to hold onto the microphone to boot.)

 

Kotzenjunge: Got any more challenges? No? Very well, I shall take out my frustrations on these wankers!

 

(he yells into the microphone as he abuses each of them)

 

Kotzejunge: It’s all about PLUR!

 

(kicks a guy in the face)

 

Kotzenjunge: Peace! Love! Unity! Respect!

 

(hits another jobber with each word)

 

Kotzenjunge: You hear me? RESPECT!!

 

(he whips another with the glowstick chain)

 

Kotzenjunge: The name is Kotzenjunge, and none of you will forget it! I’ll show all of you that ravers are NOT ghey by taking on the top of the chain of command!

 

(Kotzenjunge goes to leave...)

 

Kotzenjunge: Almost forgot!

 

(Kotzenjunge picks up one of the jobbers out of their heap and rolls him into the ring. He stands the person up in a vertical suplex position and executes the move, but in mid-suplex, drops the jobber into a stunner-like jawbreaker! The jobber is out COLD. Kotzenjunge rolls out of the ring and walks out of the arena with the microphone, pausing at the entranceway.)

 

Kotzenjunge: The party ain’t over ‘til the last record spins.

 

(“The Devil is a DJ” blasts again and he exits.)

 

Cole: Whatamanuever! That Kotzenjunge will clearly make an impact in the OAOAST.

 

Coach: Mikey, he already has! He defeated one of the OAOAST’s top stars, Big Poppa Popick, last week on the Intensezone! And to top it off, he’ll be in that big main-event battle royal today!

 

Cole: Well, now I think it’s time for the proper beginning of the Road to Anglemania: a debut match for none other than Andrew “Your Hero” Hyland! We’ve seen videos hyping this kid up, and by the looks of things, he’s not going to disappoint. When we come back, he’ll be in action!

 

(Commercial)

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Guest The Superstar

Andrew "Your Hero" Hyland vs Mr. Wrestling VI

 

:: " Theme from 2001" plays as Andrew makes his way to the ring, complete with pyro ::

 

Andrew locks up with his opponent, and backs him into the corner. He releases the lockup, and backs away, only to elbow him in the head! He follows up with some chops to the chest, and whips Mr. Wrestling into the opposite corner. Mr. Wrestling stumbles out, only to be kicked in the gut, and he takes a backdrop suplex.

 

Coach: Your Hero is a house of fire coming out of the gate, not letting Mr. Wrestling get ANY offense in!

 

Cole: MY hero? My hero is EvenflowDDT! That guy gets all the chicks!

 

Andrew gets up, and drops an elbow into the head and neck region of Mr. Wrestling. He picks him up, and quickly downs him with a snap suplex. He picks Wrestling up again, and Irish whips him, but it is reversed into a clothesline! Andrew is picked up and whipped into the ropes, and is the victim of a HIGH back body drop. As he writhes on the mat, Mr. Wrestling is playing to the crowd!

 

Cole: Well, at least Mr. Wrestling finally got some offense in.

 

Andrew gets back on his feet, only to be hit with a flurry of chops. Mr. Wrestling whips him into the ropes and attempts to back body drop him again, but Andrew has the move scouted, and instead plants Mr. Wrestling VI with a SICK brainbuster!

 

Andrew, sensing victory is near, picks up Mr. Wrestling, and nails 3 dragon suplexes, without breaking his grip

 

Cole: Can you believe that? THREE rolling Dragon Suplexes! Unbelievable!

 

Andrew again picks up the now dazed Mr. Wrestling, and kicks him in the stomach. He picks him up in a vertical suplex, only drop into a sit-out tombstone!

 

Cole & Coach, together: HERO DRIVER~! HERO DRIVER~! That’s gotta be it!

 

The ref counts:

1…2…3!

 

Winner: Andrew “Your Hero” Hyland in 2:52 (via the Hero Driver).

 

Coach: What a spectacular debut for Andrew Hyland. He absolutely decimated poor Mr. Wrestling, and gave him a Hero Driver as a consolation prize.

 

Cole: Yes, Your Hero will most DEFINITELY be an impact in the OAOAST.

 

Coach: MY hero? My hero is Barry Manilow!

 

Cole: Anyway, we understand that two members of Team OAOAST will be teaming up today on The Road to Anglemania. In fact, they’re backstage right now! Let’s check it out.

 

Tony "The Body" & The Superstar, two members of team OaOast are standing in-front of a screen of the OaOast logo.

 

Tony: Here we are, just weeks away from AngleMania II. Two teams, eight men...only four survivors. aWo, your time is ticking. Think about it ladies -- on one side you have me, Tony "The Body." Now look at my teammates -- Zack Malibu, should be OaOast Champion. Big Poppa Popick, more hated than the United States of America. The Superstar, small fish in the pond full of sharks. Of course, you probably wouldn't see a shark in a pond, but you get the point. On the 23rd, the OaOast will rid the cancer known as the aWo.

 

The Superstar glances at Tony oddly for that remark, but then smirks and picks up the interview.

 

The Superstar: You’re damn right. I’m not used to mixing it up with the main players. But you know what? That’s just another advantage I have coming into this match. The aWo has NO idea of what I’m capable of. Anglesault? I’ve beaten him on countless occasions, including my debut match. I beat Sandman in his very own environment at Doomsday. And Agnes and CWM have both fallen to The Superstar before. But that was only the tip of the iceberg. I’m faster, stronger, and more intelligent than ever before. aWo…and hell, even Team OAOAST…if you think you knew me before…THINK AGAIN.

 

(Commercial)

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Guest The Superstar

Angle-Plex vs. Flyboy

 

Cole: Well folks, the following is a special attraction match, to tune Agnes up for Wargames tomorrow night. AP has been quite perturbed by Flyboy in the last couple of weeks, to say the least.

 

Coach: Are you saying that cause he’s black? Down with the Fly! Err…let’s head to ringside for the action.

 

“Voices” hits and the crowd goes nuts with “Ban Agnes” chants as the best OAOAST wrestler eva~, Angle-Plex, enters the arena with a blue aWo t-shirt. Will that be the last time we see him wearing that shirt?

 

Already in the ring, Flyboy is doing some gay jumping jacks while wearing a “I befriend people at TSM to appear cool!” T-shirt and very, very tight pants.

 

Cole: I thought finding Big Poppa Popick’s LEATHER THONG in my bed one night was revolting, but this…

 

Coach: …is beyond words.

 

AP taunts Flyboy before the match begins, but the bell rings and these two circle each other. Plex lunges for the post whore, but Flyboy uses his “fly speed” to avoid him, and poses. Pissed off, the best OAOAST wrestler tackles Flyboy hard, and lands stiff right hands to the baby face of Flyboy. Once Flyboy reaches his feet, Agnes takes him down with a clothesline. Just as Flyboy reaches his feet, Angle-Plex takes him down with a fireman’s carry.

 

Coach: Poor Flyboy. I have a feeling this match will be brief.

 

Angle-Plex finally allows Flyboy to get to his feet, but meets him with a kick to the gut and a cross corner whip. However, Flyboy gets a boot up on a blind charge, and tries to suplex AP. However, since Flyboy is a weak-ass freshman, and AP is a strong, muscular, best OAOAST wrestler EVA~, Agnes overpowers him and gives him a snap suplex. Angle-Plex whips Flyboy into the ropes, and gives him the MAIN EVENT SPINEBUSTER~.

 

Cole: Hard sidewalk-slam type slam suplex maneuver by Angle-plex.

 

Taunting Flyboy, Agnes climbs to the second rope…DOUBLE AXE HANDLE. Angle-plex picks Flyboy up…and puts him out of his misery with the ANGLE-PLEX! 1…2…3!

 

Winner: Angle-plex in 4:07 (via the Angle-Plex).

 

Cole: Very decisive victory for the OAOAST’s most popular member, Angle-plex. He made Flyboy look like the ignorant punk he really is.

 

Coach: And up next…get ready for…THE THINK TANK~!

 

(Commercial)

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Guest The Superstar

THE THINK TANK

 

ZsasZ sits in the new THINK-TANK set. It looks very grey and utilitarian. There's a desk for ZsasZ and a small stool for the guest.

 

 

ZsasZ(Becomes increasingly menacing.): Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the first edition of... The THINK-TANK. Before I get to my first guest, I'd like to take a moment to mention a very special friend of mine. BPP, I know who attacked me, and so do you. So I invite you to a special event next IZ. A special edition of... THE THINK-TANK. There will be entertainment, You and I and Reject and the man who attacked me. When you see his face, you will know who has TRULY been terrorizing the OAOAST. But... enough about me. Let's get to my esteemed guest. Ladies and Gentlemen, put your hands together for... ZACK MALIBU.

 

(Zack exudes charm as he practically glides over to his seat. Women scream his name.)

 

ZsasZ: Calm yourselves ladies, I assure you he's still single. Anyway... good to have such a... popular fellow as my first guest."

 

Zack: "What can I say?"

 

ZsasZ: "Indeed. It's just a shame really..."

 

Zack: "What do you mean?"

 

ZsasZ: "Well that you don't get along with your professional partners as well as your personal ones."

 

Zack: "What do you know about it?"

 

ZsasZ: "Is it true, or isn't it that you have been "betrayed", and I want that in quotes, by every partner you've ever had. Everyone of them says the same thing: That YOU stole the spotlight."

 

Zack: "Well that isn't entirely..."

 

ZsasZ: "Yes it is. The only reason you havn't been shunted by your OAOAST teammates is because they're too busy trying to save the company while you hog the god-damn..."

 

Zack: "YOU GOT A FUCKING PROBLEM WITH ME NEWBIE?"

 

ZsasZ: "Not yet, no. But you are becoming *quite* testy. I must confess I did tell a small fib. When I said your professional relationships were better than your personal ones. That...well that just isn't..."

 

Zack: "Alright, this ends now."

 

(Gets up.)

 

ZsasZ: "Come back you chicken-shit! You gonna leave me like your..."

 

(Zack dives into ZsasZ and the two engage in a hellacous brawl.)

 

Cameraman: Kill the feed! Kill it!

-------------------------------

Coach: Well that was, uh…

 

Cole: …interesting, to say the least.

 

Coach: Yeah. Well, ladies and gentlemen, tomorrow night is ZERO HOUR. With that in mind, let’s head down to the OAOAST Control Center, with Jesse “The Body” Ventura!

 

ZERO HOUR Control Center~!

 

Jesse: Thanks, ya two buffoons. And as they said, this is the Zero Hour Control Center. For now, it’s owned by the OAOAST. But come tomorrow night, it may very well be overtaken by the aWo. That’s because tomorrow night at Zero Hour, Team OAOAST takes on Team aWo. If Team OAOAST wins, the aWo is gone for good. But if the aWo win, they will be calling the shots. In fact, for a more in-depth look at our main event, let’s take you back to the Intensezone this past week, where Team OAOAST was absolutely brutalized.

 

Tony The Body, a member of Team OAOAST for War Games, comes out on stage for this matchup. Tony pauses on the stage and salutes the crowd, only to be blasted from behind with a chairshot from CWM! The OAOAST Tag Team Champions ambush Tony from behind, as Sandman drives his title belt into Tony’s skull, knocking Tony down the ramp.

 

Jesse: “Dammit! Those two bastards just hit Tony from behind! They know they can’t take Tony man-on-man, and I emphasize the MAN part!”

JR: “They’re bastards, I know Jess.”

 

Tony is rolling down the ramp, bleeding from the belt shot. CWM and Sandman are content to kick him down, looking to severely injure him. Tony tries to stand, but CWM cracks him with the chair across the back again. Sandman is digging under the ring, and pulls out a ladder. Sandman slams the ladder across Tony’s back, as Tony is in all kinds of pain.

 

CWM whacks Tony across the back with a chair, as the official is trying to get the aWo off of Tony so the match can start. Sandman shoves the official away as stomps on Tony some more, as “Downfall” hits as SuperStar comes sprinting down the ramp to the cheers of the crowd.

 

SS ducks under CWM’s chair shot and tackles Sandman, driving him into the ring apron. CWM hits SS across the back with the chair, but SS turns and starts to fire away on CWM! SS knocks CWM back against the guardrail, but Sandman grabs the ladder and nails SS’s left knee with it, sending SS down to the ground. SS clutches his left leg as Sandman slams the ladder across it.

 

JR: “Dammit! Someone end this onslaught! Someone stop these two before they severely injure SS and Tony!”

 

Tony tries to get up, but CWM grabs one of the tag belts and blasts him in the head with it again. Tony is bleeding severely and is unable to defend himself. CWM grabs his chair and starts to choke Tony with it. SS is still holding his knee, as Sandman slams the ladder across it once more. The official tries once again to stop the assault, but CWM cracks the official over the head with the chair, knocking the official out!

 

CWM digs around under the ring and pulls out a table. CWM sets it up at ringside and places Tony on it. CWM gets Sandman’s attention and pulls Sandman off of SS. Sandman slides into the ring, flips the crowd off, runs the ropes and comes off with the no-hands somersault plancha, driving Tony through the table! Sandman hops back up to celebrate as Tony lies in the wreckage of the table, bleeding and struggling to remain conscious.

 

SS tries to stand, but a CWM chair shot to his left leg ends that. Sandman pulls out a second table and helps CWM put SS onto the table. Sandman places the ladder on top of SS and slides back into the ring, looking for the Springboard 450, but Zack Malibu comes running down the ramp with a lead pipe in hand! CWM bails out, running away and hopping the guardrail, as Sandman slides out of the ring and also bails out over the guardrail! Zack throws the ladder off of SS and helps him off the table, as officials and EMT’s come down to ringside to attend to SS and Tony. CWM and Sandman walk away from the ring in the crowd, pleased at their actions.

 

Jesse: Tomorrow night, it will all end. WARGAMES. Team OAOAST vs. Team aWo. Winner take all.

 

Team OAOAST:

Tony “The Body”

Zack Malibu

Big Poppa Popick

The Superstar

 

Team aWo:

Anglesault

Angle-plex

CobainWasMurdered

Sandman9000

 

Jesse: And that’s not all. There will be a match beforehand, that will determine which order the teams enter Wargames. And if one member of a team is injured and can’t compete in Wargames, the winner of this match will take their place.

 

EvenflowDDT vs. Alfdogg

 

Jesse: These two have clashed before, and the results have been fantastic. I can’t wait to see how these guys mix it up tomorrow night. The next match’s brutality can be summed up in three simple letters: T…L…C. Three teams will meet for the right to be the #1 contender for the OAOAST Tag Team Championship.

 

The Mystery Weirdness Connection

 

Los Infernales

 

Green Mist & Naz Mistry

 

Jesse: This match promises to be a death-defying, high-flying classic. You’ll never know what can happen when you mix tables, ladders, chairs, and barbed wire into one deadly combination.

 

Plus, let the new guys shine at ZERO HOUR. First, North American TV Champion Thunderkid defends his championship against not one, not two, but three men: Andrew “Your Hero” Hyland, Brockk Ausstin, and Y2Jailbait. Brockk and Jailbait have a storied feud…who will become NATV Champ? And the enigmatic, bizarre ZsasZ looks to win X-Division gold against the always-able Reject.

 

You DO NOT want to miss ZERO HOUR. Wargames, TLC, and two titles on the line. Who will control the OAOAST as we know it?

 

(Commercial)

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Guest The Superstar

The Superstar & Tony “The Body” vs. William Eagle & Lance P0rn

 

“Downfall” hits and the crowd goes crazy as a member of Team OAOAST, The Superstar, makes his way to the ring. He doesn’t go in the ring, and he waits for his partner to come out.

 

“Simply Ravishing” blares through the arena and the crowd has another heart attack as TONY THE BODY power-walks to the ring. He talks some quick strategy with The Superstar, and they rush to the ring to take on Eagle and P0rn.

 

It’s a pier-4 brawl to start, but Team OAOAST quickly gets the advantage, clotheslining William out of the ring. Lance then falls victim to a DOUBLE ATOMIC DROP~! Lance exits, and Eagle comes in with a low blow to The Superstar. The ref brings Tony to his corner, which allows the heels to double team Superstar. Lance gets a suplex on Superstar, but can’t keep him down for more than two. However, Superstar fights right out, gives Lance a flying forearm, and a TRANSFORMATION! P0rn, however, comes back with a heel kick, and sets Superstar up on the top rope. However, Superstar pushes him off the top, and hits a FROG SPLASH~! Cover: 1…2…Eagle breaks up the pin. This brings Tony into the ring, as he gives William an inverted atomic drop!

 

Cole: Strong showing by both teams in the opening stages of this match.

 

Superstar gets Lance in a waistlock and goes for a German Suplex, but P0rn flips all the way out and tags in William Eagle. Eagle immediately goes to work with forearms and European uppercuts, dazing The Superstar.

 

Cole: Eagle is using his strong European heritage to take advantage of Superstar.

 

Coach: No, I think that’s the other William guy.

 

He goes for a Tiger Driver, but Superstar powers out, and sets up the STAR POWER…but Eagle goes low to escape, and gets a cross corner whip. However, Superstar moves out of the way of a charge, hooks Eagle…SUPERNOVA~!!

 

Coach: This is the opportunity that The Superstar needs. Can he make the hot tag to Tony?

 

Superstar makes the hot tag to Tony! Tony is a HOUSE EN FUEGO with forearms and clotheslines to Eagle & P0rn. Eagle ends up taking a DOUBLE SLINGSHOT SUPLEX, and P0rn takes a double DDT. Finally, Eagle loads up with brass knuckles, but doesn’t see Tony…the OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE!! He signals to The Superstar, who climbs up top…SUPERSPLASH! Tony covers: 1…2…3!

 

Winners: The Superstar & Tony the Body in 7:36 (via an Out of Body Experience and the SuperSplash).

 

Cole: Well, ladies and gentlemen, right now would’ve been the much-anticipated Spiderpoet/Triple H match for the love of Stephanie. Alas, contract negotiations for HHH’s second OAOAST match were through the roof, and no decision was made.

 

Coach: BUT…we do have a special video package put together to get you pumped up for this match, which will be taking place NEXT WEEK~!

 

FOR THE LOVE OF STEPHANIE

 

Song: SMASHING PUMPKINS - TONIGHT, TONIGHT

 

The orchestrated/rock music cues up, and we see Stephanie McMahon as it rises to a passionate well. As the guitars become prominent, we see SP and EL DANDY making their way down to the ring on an IZ past.

 

TIME, IS NEVER TIME AT ALL

::footage of SP in an Indy, hitting the SPIDAHSAULT~! with Stephanie McMahon attending in the crowd::

YOU CAN NEVER, EVER LEAVE WITHOUT LEAVING A PIECE OF YOU

::SP leaving the WWE under dubious circumstances some five years earlier, he is seen walking away with his bag slung over his shoulder, Steph looking on sadly::

AND OUR LIVES ARE FOREVER CHANGED

::McMahon-Helmsley era footage, Steph and Hunter at the top of the RAW ramp::

WE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME

::SP debuting on IZ::

THE MORE YOU CHANGE THE LESS YOU FEEL

::SP turning heel, intercut with Stephanie's heelish antics::

 

BELIEVE, BELIEVE IN ME

::SP on top of a turnbuckle::

BELIEVE . . . BELIEVE~!

::SP leaps off and hits a high air Spidahsault::

THAT LIFE CAN CHANGE

::Stephanie and Shane at the ECW return::

THAT YOUR NOT STUCK IN VAIN

::SP saving his partner by putting himself through a table at Bloody, Battered, and Beaten::

WE'RE NOT THE SAME

::old footage of SP and Steph backstage at an old RAW::

WE'RE DIFFERENT

::shot of SP and Steph, with Triple H with his arms raised between them::

TONIGHT

::SP coming down the ramp::

TONIGHT

::Triple H spitting water::

TONIGHT, SO BRIGHT

::SP moonsault::

TONIGHT

::Trips Pedigree to Rocky::

TONIGHT

::both::

 

AND YOU KNOW YOUR NEVER SURE

::SP getting pinned::

BUT YOU"RE SURE YOU COULD BE RIGHT

::Dandy tagging SP into a match::

IF YOU HELD YOURSELF UP TO THE LIGHT

::Reports of Triple H's politics flash by::

AND THE EMBERS NEVER FADE

::A picture of Steph taped to the inside of SP's locker as he walks by in a shot::

IN THE CITY BY THE LAKE

::Shot of SP at home in SC, which is by a lake::

IN THE PLACE WHERE YOU WERE BORN

::Shot of the OAOAST Arena::

 

BELIEVE

::Dandy and SP high fiving one another::

BELIEVE IN ME

::Shot of SP looking at the pic of Steph in his locker::

BELIEVE

::Triple H and Austin with the Tag Titles::

BELIEVE

::Triple H and Evolution standing over Steiner::

 

IN THE RESOLUTE URGENCY OF NOW

::The engagement announcement::

AND DO YOU BELIEVE

::SP freaking out::

THERES NOT A CHANCE TONIGHT

::The OAOAST Arena, and SP taping his wrists up::

TONIGHT TONIGHT

::Triple H holding up a world title::

SO BRIGHT

::The Road to AngleMania logo::

TONIGHT TONIGHT

::SP sitting alone in his locker room::

 

WE'LL CRUCIFY THE INSINCERE TONIGHT (Tonight)

::SP watching Triple H Pedigree Stephanie at WMX8::

WE'LL MAKE THINGS RIGHT

::SP trying to get into Titan Towers::

WE'LL FEEL IT ALL TONIGHT (Tonight)

::SP and Triple H staring one another down outside the offices while WWE officials seperate them::

WE'LL FIND A WAY TO OFFER UP THE NIGHT (Tonight)

::Stephanie shaking her head from inside the towers through a window::

THE INDESCRIBABLE MOMENTS OF YOUR LIFE (Tonight)

::SP making his entrance with his pyro and lights going off around him::

THE IMPOSSIBLE IS POSSIBLE TONIGHT (Tonight)

::Triple H making his entrance::

 

BELIEVE IN ME AS I BELIEVE IN YOU

::(slow motion) SP with his hand pressed against a window at Titan Towers, as Steph backs away and officials pull him away::

TONIGHT

::SP sitting alone in his locker room::

TONIGHT TONIGHT

::Steph leaving Triple H alone in his::

TONIGHT

::Stephanie sitting alone elsewhere in the building::

TONIGHT

::Matchup Graphic with SP and Triple H posing::

 

::fade out::

 

Coach: Damn! I know I can’t wait for that match!

 

Cole: Well, you’ll have to. Ladies and gentlemen, it’s been a rollercoaster ride so far, but up next, it’s a MAIN EVENT battle royal between 10 of the top new OAOAST stars today! It will be contested under Royal Rumble rules…and it’s next!

 

(Commercial)

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Guest The Superstar

Newbie Battle Royal~!

Amazing Rando

The Shocker

Kotzenjunge

Yuna Firerose

L.A. Parka

Peter Knight

Shattered Dreams

Max Zorin

“Shooter” Jay Darring

The Mad Cappa

 

Cole: Oh man, I can’t wait for this. The rules are simple: Two men start, and every 90 seconds, another wrestler enters the ring. You can only lose by being thrown over the top rope, with both feet touching the floor.

 

Coach: And the last man standing wins! I love it!

 

Cole: And, in fact, we’re going to let YOU, the fans, love it by tuning out our commentary. Enjoy this battle royal without the annoyances of Cole and Coach!

 

The crowd waits in anticipation…and then “The Wreckoning” hits, and our first entrant is SHATTERED DREAMS! As one third of the Dream Machines, he’s hoping to make an impact in this battle royal.

 

The music of the #2 entrant hits…”California Love”! Dreams looks shocked, as the second entrant is his partner, L.A. Parka! He slowly enters the ring, as these two don’t know what to make of their unlucky draws, and the fact that they have to face each other. The bell rings, and the two shake hands before circling each other.

 

We are officially underway, but these two are very wary of each other. They tie up, with Dreams getting the better of the exchange, getting LA Parka into the corner. SD follows it up with CHOKING~!, but Parka fights out, goes behind SD, and gives him a HALF NELSON SUPLEX! He waits for him to get up, and charges into the corner, but Shattered Dreams moves, Parka hits the turnbuckle, and SD gives him a falling reverse DDT.

 

10…9…8…7…6..5…4…3…2…1…*BUZZ*

 

“The Devil is a DJ” hits for the second time today, and it’s KOTZENJUNGE! Unhappy with his draw for this battle royal, Kotz immediately charges at the Dream Machines and begins beating on them.

 

KJ immediately gives Parka a STIFF~! Kick to the head, and takes Shattered Dreams down with a float-over DDT. However, Kotzenjunge does too much posing/dancing, and Parka is back up, and setting Kotz up for The Supercharger: One vertical suplex…another…Parka goes for the Michinoku Driver, but Kotz reverses into a tombstone position. However, Shattered Dreams is back up, and hits a stiff punch to the head of Kotzenjunge. KJ stumbles back, onto the shoulders of Parka, as SD climbs the ropes. They set him up…DREAM CATCHER~!!!

 

10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…*BUZZ*

 

“Puppet” plays and out comes THE AMAZING RANDO! He rushes into the ring to join the action as our #4 entrant.

 

Right out of the gates, Rando sees Kotzenjunge recovering on the second rope from the Dream Catcher, so Rando runs…3-2-1!! Kotz got planted. Parka tries his luck, but gets caught with the Commercial Sign~! Shattered Dreams attacks Rando from behind, however, and gives him a Tiger Driver. The Dream Machines put the boots to Rando, and Kotzenjunge gets up, and starts barking orders at them like he’s their leader! The Machines look at each other, then at Kotzenjunge, and take him down with a double clothesline! Rando, however, catches Shattered Dreams with a dropkick.

 

10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…*BUZZ*

 

“The Fake Sound of Progress” plays and our #5 entrant, Shooter Jay, heads to the ring. We’re halfway through with the entrants, let’s get back to the action!

 

Jay make his debut with kicks and punches to everyone in the ring. While Jay hits Parka with a roaring elbow, Rando jumps onto Kotzenjunge’s shoulders for a hurracanrana…but Kotz catches him, brings him to the ropes, and POWERBOMBS HIM ALL THE WAY TO THE FLOOR! We have our first elimination: RANDO IS GONE! As Kotzenjunge celebrates, Jay comes behind him, grabs him in reverse DDT position, and heads to the second rope: REVERSE TORNADO DDT. However, LA Parka catches HIM with a nice Michinoku Driver, and everyone is out.

 

10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…*BUZZ*

 

“My Way” hits, and out comes #6, the controversial YUNA FIREROSE! Being the only female in this match (and in the OAOAST) she makes her way to the ring to show that GIRLZ R00L, BOYZ DR00L~!

 

Yuna targets Parka, who is the only one standing, and gives him a flying head scissors. Shattered Dreams is up next, and falls victim to a nice spinning heel kick. However, Kotzenjunge sneaks behind her, and gives her a NASTY RUDO HEEL CLOTHESLINE to the back of the head. Kotz picks her up roughly, but gets a mule kick! Yuna whips Kotz into the corner for the Rosebud, but The Dream Machines nod at each other, and double-clothesline Yuna over the top rope! Yuna is gone! Kotzenjunge takes a missile dropkick from Shooter Jay, but the Dream Machines are back on top of him, pounding away.

 

10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…*BUZZ*

 

“Slave to the Rhythm” plays, and #7, Max Zorin, dances to the ring. He looks to help his dancing partner, Kotzenjunge.

 

Since The Dream Machines are working over Shooter Jay, that leaves only Kotzenjunge for Max to fight. Since they’re sometime-partners in crime, they start DANCING~ in the ring! The DM notice this, and charge at Boogie Knights 2.0, but Parka gets a EXPLODER SUPLEX by Max, and a SD gets a DDT from Kotzenjunge. With Parka down, Max heads up top for a moonsault, but Shooter Jay charges, and shoves Max off the turnbuckle, to the floor! Max is eliminated!

 

10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…*BUZZ*

 

“Welcome Home” plays, and our #8 entrant, The Shocker, charges to the ring. He’s one of the biggest men in this match, let’s see if he uses his size to his advantage.

 

Seeing the size of Shocker, the four men in the ring all rush at him, trying to take him down. However, Kotzenjunge takes a Stun Gun, and the rest take clotheslines. Noticing Kotzenjunge draped across the ropes, Shocker immediately tries to eliminate him. KJ teases elimination, but doesn’t go out…yet. Parka sees both men jockeying for position on the ropes, and charges at both of them. He pushes them both out of the ring…NO, Shocker and Kotz land on the apron, but Parka’s momentum takes him all the way out of the ring! Parka is gone! Meanwhile, Shattered Dreams is choking Shooter Jay in the corner, but Jay moves out of the way…STIFF~! Superkick!

 

10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…*BUZZ*

 

“The Final Audition” hits and here’s #9, The Mad Cappa! The luck of the draw is really starting to come into play, so Cappa should make the best of it.

 

Cappa gets in the ring, and seeing Jay work over Shattered Dreams in the corner, gives Shooter the Fall From Grace! Shattered Dreams, now free from the beatdown of Jay, sees Shocker hung up on the ropes, getting attacked by Kotzenjunge. Kotzenjunge stops to pose for the crowd, so SD takes advantage, running dropkick to Shocker that sends him all the way up and out of the ring! Shocker is gone!! Kotzenjunge turns around, and doesn’t see Shocker. Enraged, he charges at SD, but SD ducks and gives Kotz a swinging neckbreaker. Meanwhile, Cappa sets up Shooter Jay on the top rope…IT’S SHOWTIME~! Jay is OUT.

 

10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…*BUZZ*

 

#10 is predictable, as “Malice” hits, and The Dream Machines’ bodyguard, Peter Knight, rushes to the ring as our last entrant in the battle royal!

 

Knight notices that Cappa is now attacking Shattered Dreams, so Knight clubs him in the back of the head, and gives him THE KNIGHTMARE! Then he sets up Cappa for a sit-out powerbomb, but SD also hits a NECKBREAKER, in a SICK double-team move called the DEEP SLEEP~! Kotzenjunge stomps on both Dream Machines, however, and takes the opportunity to clothesline The Mad Cappa over the top! Cappa is gone!

 

FINAL FOUR: Shattered Dreams, Shooter Jay, Kotzenjunge, Peter Knight.

 

The Dream Machines obviously take control, double teaming both Kotzenjunge and Jay. The tide turns, and Jay works over Dreams. However, SD gets a low blow in, and hits the RODEO DRIVER~! Meanwhile, Knight has Kotz down in the corner, and charges, but Kotzenjunge ducks, and lifts the bodyguard up…THE LAST RECORD~! Simultaneously, Shattered Dreams tosses Shooter Jay out, and Kotzenjunge eliminates Peter Knight! KNIGHT IS GONE! JAY IS GONE! We’re down to the final two!

 

And we’re down to this: The number one entrant and the number three entrant. Without any egging on, the two charge at each other and lock up. SD takes advantage, getting a pair of armdrags, and a blatant choke. He’s been in there longer, so he’s trying to wear down the “fresher” of the two. SD whips Kotzenjunge into the ropes, but Kotz ducks a clothesline, and hits a STIFF~! Kick to the head. Kotzenjunge picks SD up, and brings him down with an inverted DDT. The crowd is getting behind SD, which is odd, since they both are heels. They must still think RAVES ARE GHEY~!

 

Kotzenjunge taunts the crowd, before locking in a single leg crab, and he twists the leg around, into an STF! Obviously there are no submissions, so Kotz is just using this as a wear-down hold. He finally lets go after a minute, and easily tosses Shattered Dreams out!

 

No wait, SD skins the cat, comes back in, and shoves Kotzenjunge out of the ring!

 

Now KOTZENJUNGE skins the cat, comes up behind Shattered Dreams…THE LAST RECORD! Kotzenjunge picks him up…and eliminates Shattered Dreams for the win! KOTZENJUNGE WINS!!

 

Winner: Kotzenjunge in 18:22.

 

Order of Entry:

1. Shattered Dreams

2. L.A. Parka

3. Kotzenjunge

4. The Amazing Rando

5. Shooter Jay

6. Yuna Firerose

7. Max Zorin

8. The Shocker

9. The Mad Cappa

10. Peter Knight

 

Order of Elimination:

1. The Amazing Rando (by Kotzenjunge)

2. Yuna Firerose (by L.A. Parka/Shattered Dreams)

3. Max Zorin (by Shooter Jay)

4. L.A. Parka (himself)

5. The Shocker (by Shattered Dreams)

6. The Mad Cappa (by Kotzenjunge)

7. Shooter Jay (by Shattered Dreams)

8. Peter Knight (by Kotzenjunge)

9. Shattered Dreams (by Kotzenjunge)

 

Cole: WHAT A SPECTACULAR BATTLE ROYAL! Kotzenjunge reigns supreme, but what an effort by all 10 people!

 

Coach: Indeed. Shattered Dreams put up perhaps the best showing, lasting first to last and eliminating three! But no matter what way you look at it, all 10 of these people will make a great impact in the OAOAST.

 

Cole: And with that, the inaugural edition of THE ROAD TO ANGLEMANIA II ends. Good night everyone, we hope you enjoyed the show, and we’ll see you next week! For Jonathan Coachman, I’m Michael Cole, lata~!

 

coleandcoachman.jpg

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Guest The Superstar

© 2003 OAOAST Productions

 

Credits:

 

Executive Producer/Director/Your God

 

The Superstar

 

Writers

 

Kotzenjunge

Andrewisyourhero

Tony149

Spiderpoet

ZsasZ

 

You can leave feedback in this thread. And Sault...DON'T MOVE IT AGAIN, ASSCLOWN~!

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Guest The Superstar

Why the fuck is this in general discussion?

 

Did Hot NewzWIRE~!'s PM to you fuck up your head?

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Guest Anglesault

There really is a lot to be said for screwing with Supershit's head.

 

As long as you don't accidently send it into the WWF folder.

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Guest Mystery Eskimo

Good stuff. Kotz is getting the newbie push, eh.

 

I should support him, being a fellow Brit and all. But raves are ghey.

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Guest The Superstar
Supershit, you didn't credit me you dumb fuck!

Hmmm...I'll look into it.

 

*Depushes ZsasZ*

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Guest Kotzenjunge
Good stuff. Kotz is getting the newbie push, eh.

 

I should support him, being a fellow Brit and all. But raves are ghey.

I'm not really British. I just wish I was.

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Guest Tony149

Good show. I like how everything looked. Sorry I couldn't write the Body Control Center, but it rocked nonetheless.

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Guest Anglesault
Good stuff. Kotz is getting the newbie push, eh.

 

I should support him, being a fellow Brit and all. But raves are ghey.

I'm not really British. I just wish I was.

Yep, that's the first and most likely only time I'll hear that.

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Guest caboose
Good stuff. Kotz is getting the newbie push, eh.

 

I should support him, being a fellow Brit and all. But raves are ghey.

I'm not really British. I just wish I was.

You damn straight you wish you were BRITISH!

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Guest Anglesault

To tell you the truth, I can live with the British, shading bathing habits and all. The French on the otherhand...

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Guest Kotzenjunge

Actually, let me clarify. I love being an American and all, but it just seems like being British would rule a lot more. Not really sure I'd want to leave this massive country for an island though.

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ROSEBUD~! When was the last I used *that* in a match (I'm talkin' PWSF here). Damn bookers. I would complain 'bout my BOYZ~! not being there, but I suppose they were in the back...............

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

..........watching my match! (What were YOU thinkin'??)

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Guest ZACK ATTACK~!

OMG WTF I WROTE A LONG ASS REVEW FOR TIS SHOW HONEST. FUKCIN AWO MUST BE HAX0RING MY IE DAMMIT I CANT WAIT TO SEE THEM LOSE AT THE PPV!!!!!!!!!!!

 

this probly hapens to scot keith all the time. damn AWO. anyway to sumarize since i dun wanna type that siht again im glaed MY MAIN MAN ZACK DA KING MACK kickzsed zasz' assz and dream machines are awesome they shoulda won da riumble i was sure shattered dreams was the next HBK they proly changed the finish to hold himj down (as we smarkz call it). as for kotz... how can somebody sux so much but be so good? overall *****

 

maybe i should hit alt+f4 to save tomorow when im reviewing ZERO HOUR! CANT WAIT TO SEE DA AWO DIE! until tehn, wish youda read my real colmun that was an waesome revue. keep it real B-)

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Guest The Superstar

Evenflow LOVES~ me and thinks I'm |33t~!

 

And Parka, you charged at Kotzenjunge and The Shocker to eliminate them, but they tumbled over and landed on the apron. You tumbled over and out of the ring. That's how you 'eliminated yourself'. :)

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Guest evenflowDDT
Evenflow LOVES~ me and thinks I'm |33t~!

Uhhh... indeed? Good show by the way, your shows always seem to have a different "flow" (OMG NO PUN INTENDED!!!11!!) to them, be they OAOMEF or this new RtA venture. Good stuff, keep it up, and maybe I'll squash a jobber this week.

 

Coach + Cole = best. b-team announcers. ever.

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Guest Angle-plex

Yeah, I really like how he italicized and bolded things. It makes the shows a lot easier to read.

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