Jump to content
TSM Forums
Sign in to follow this  
Guest caboose

Friday Night HeldDown~! 5/16/03

Recommended Posts

Guest caboose

OAOAST Announcement.

 

Due to legal issues which arose moments before the scheduled Thursday Night Broadcast of HeldDown, the show was prevented from airing.

 

The legal matter concerns a video package put together by the Boogie Knights 2K3 team. As a result of the content of the video package, it was felt by an independent party depicted in the video package that the video footage was not legal in it’s planned usage.

 

Therefore HeldDown was pulled from the air. The show has been edited in accordance with the legal demands and will air shortly.

 

On a side note, HeldDown legal staff are to contest the censorship and will hopefully have the footage ready to air next week.

 

We apologise for any inconvenience this may have caused.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

OAOAST HeldDOWN for May 16th!

 

helddown.jpg

 

The Pyro fires off and the crowd goes wild for the start of the highest rated E-Fed show in the WORLD!

 

coleandcoachman.jpg

 

Michael Cole: Ladies and gentleman, welcome to HeldDOWN!

 

More pyro explodes, and the crowd is shown going crazy.

 

Cole: I'm Michael Cole and as ever with me is the incomparable COACH!

 

Jonathan Coachman: Yes, hello and welcome to what no doubt will be another barn storming edition of HeldDOWN!

 

Cole: What a show we had last week, Caboose continued to lay down the law, the bizarre MISTER WARRIOR made his debut, things started to heat up between AngleSault and Some Guy...

 

Coach: Widow and Crystal got their claws into each other and will get it on tonight!

 

Cole: Zack also had trouble with Crystal, but still held on to his World Championship!

 

Coach: And The Boogie Knights secured a shot at the Tag Team champions, Los Infernales~! at 'School's Out'!

 

Cole: And this week we’ve had a huge 8-Man tag team battle signed involving Totally Endorsed and the World OAOAST Heavyweight Champion, Zack Malibu!

 

::"Sympathy for the Devil" by The Rolling Stones starts up::

 

Cole: Looks like we are kicking off tonight with some singles action!

 

Coach: About damn time! Let's get some action going!

 

Michael Cole: For real, my home dog!

 

Coach: Shut up, cracker!

 

As "Sympathy for the Devil" by The Rolling Stones starts up, Ragdoll, making his Heldown! debut, runs out, with his manager, Melanie, walking behind him. Ragdoll jumps onto the ring apron, and springboards into the ring. Ragdoll circles around the ring, waiting for his opponent...

 

Michael Cole: Well, this young kid is going to have one hell of a challenge in front of him. As he takes on, "The Current Big Thing" Brock Ausstin in his debut match!

 

Coach: Oh, that cracka is dead, foo!

 

Michael Cole: Right on, my brother!

 

Coach: Shut the hell up before I cut your throat!

 

Michael Cole: Yes, sir.

 

"War Ensemble" by Slayer begins playing, as "The Current Big Thing" Brock Ausstin makes his way down towards the ring, with "Good Ol'ECDub" Jim Heyross walking behind him. Brock walks up to the ring, and leaps up in a single bound, onto the ring apron. Brock begins doing his HAPPY HAPPY HIPPO~! dance, but before getting into the ring, Ragdoll charges at Brock, and gives Brock a swift elbow to the side of the head. Ragdoll hits Brock with two more quick elbows to the head, then turns around, and runs into the opposite ropes at full speed.

 

Michael Cole: Ragdoll trying to get a quick advantage on the much bigger and stronger Brock Ausstin....

 

:: Ragdoll bounces into the ropes, and comes running back towards Brock, but gets stopped short, as Brock slingshots himself over the top rope from the apron, and drives his shoulder into Ragdoll, throwing Ragdoll backwards into the ropes, and down onto the mat!!!! ::

 

Michael Cole: Holy Potato's!

 

Coach: Potato's? Nah, that ain't cool, dawg.

 

Michael Cole: Where did Brock Ausstin get that agility! He nearly killed Ragdoll.

 

:: Brock quickly gets back to his feet, and lets out a murderous scream, as Jim Heyross as a sly grin on his face, while rubbing his hands menousisly. Brock walks over to the downed Ragdoll, and grabs him by the hair, lifting him to his feet. Brock holds Ragdoll up by the hair, but quickly lets go, and wraps his giant arms around the waist of Ragdoll, and in one swift motion, throws Ragdoll backwards with a overhead belly to belly suplex. ::

 

Michael Cole: Hossly Goodness by Brock!

 

Coach: Brizock wit da cover!

 

Michael Cole: One.......Two.......Thre.....NO! Ragdoll just got a shoulder up!

 

:: Brock looks at the referee suprised, but quickly gets up to his feet. Brock pulls Ragdoll up to his feet, and pulls him into a powerbomb position. Brock wraps his arms around Ragdoll's waist, and lifts Ragdoll straight into the air for a powerbomb. ::

 

Michael Cole: Brock going for the I'M GOING TO EAT YOUR SOUL!

 

Coach: Do you have to shout that out?

 

Michael Cole: No, but it sounded cool, didn't it?

 

Coach: Not when you said it.

 

:: Brock goes to drop down, driving Ragdoll into the mat with the sitout powerbomb, but Ragdoll uses his speed to fall backwards, and hurricanrana's Brock, leaving Brock lying on the mat! ::

 

Michael Cole: Hurricanrana by Ragdoll! Can Ragdoll turn this beating around, and pull the upset over Brock? This announcer thinks so!

 

Coach: Your a loser, you know that, right?

 

Michael Cole: My mother said I am the coolest boy who works for this company!

 

Coach: Ima smack yo mamma!

 

:: On the outside of the ring, Melanie begins slapping her hands against the ring apron, to get the crowd behind Ragdoll, who struggles to crawl to the ropes. Ragdoll rolls under the bottom rope, and makes his way to his feet on the apron, and begins climbing to the top rope. In the ring, Brock begins to get to his feet, and turns towards the corner Ragdoll is on. Ragdoll leaps off, and gives Brock a dropkick, connecting with Brock's chest, knocking Brock down to the mat. Ragdoll quickly jumps over onto Brock, and goes for a pin. ::

 

Coach: One.....Two......No! Brock kicked out!

 

:: Ragdoll quickly gets to his feet, and runs towards the corner. Ragdoll leaps up onto the top rope, and turns his body towards the downed Brock. Ragdoll leaps through the air, and drives his skull into Brock's giant shoulder! ::

 

Michael Cole: Diving headbutt by Ragdoll! Now the Cover! It's all over! One! Two! Three.....NO!

 

Coach: Brock Ausstin kicked out of the diving headbutt! Fo sheez!

 

:: Ragdoll leaps to his feet, and begins shouting at the refere that it was a three count. Ragdoll looks around the arena, disappointed, and gets an idea. Ragdoll grabs Brock by the back of his head, and lifts Brock to his feet. Ragdoll drags him towards the corner, and with all his strength, lifts the bigger Brock into a sitting position on the top rope. Ragdoll pulls himself up onto the middle rope, and then steps up to the top rope, facing the auidence. Ragdoll shouts out towards the crowd, and leaps into the air, wrapping his legs around Brock's head, and flips backwards for a top rope hurricanrana!!!!!!!!! ::

 

Michael Cole: Ragdoll going for a top rope hurricanrana, but look!

 

Coach: Brock is holding on!

 

:: Brock, who is still sitting on the top rope, holds onto the legs of Ragdoll, as Ragdoll hangs upside down from the top rope. Brock stands up on the middle rope, and uses his massive strength to pull Ragdoll back up towards him, and soon holds him in a powerbomb position. ::

 

Michael Cole: No! He can't do what I think he is going to do!

 

Coach: He is!

 

:: Brock leaps off the middle rope, still holding onto Ragdoll, and drives Ragdoll back first into the mat, with a sitout powerbomb! ::

 

Michael Cole: IM GOING TO EAT YOUR SOUL from the middle rope!

 

Coach: I don't think Ragdoll can move now!

 

Michael Cole: There is the count! One! Two! Three! This one is over folks!

 

Coach: What a way to welcome Ragdoll to Heldown!, Brock!

 

Winner: Brock Ausstin via pinfall (Super IM GOING TO EAT YOUR SOUL) @ 5:17

 

Cole: What a way to kick off HeldDOWN! A big win for Brock!

 

Coach: I just know the rest of the show is going to be even better!...

 

Cole: I’m getting reports that cameras have spotted HeldDown’s latest addition to it’s roster outside!...

Josh Matthews: We spotted him wandering around outside the arena...

 

Cole: Who is it?

 

Matthews: It’s the newest member of the Held Down roster Jimmy Beard. He has stepped inside the most famous barber shop in the world, ‘Haircuts of Doom’. As you can see Jimmy has parked his safeway trolley outside and has already made his way in.

 

Coach: His trolley?

 

Matthews: It’s his preferred mode of transport! I’ll have more as things develope!

 

--------------------------------------------

Commercial for OAOAST Juicy Juice

--------------------------------------------

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

Back from Commercial:

 

Peter Knight walks through the hallways, focused as usual. He stops in front of the Dream Machines’ dressing room but pauses before opening the door since it sounds like waves are crashing.

 

PK: You gotta be kidding me.

 

He opens the door to find Parka and Eddy Kalm in lying on the floor on beach towels, wearing sunglasses and completely silent. An umbrella is propped up, shading them from the fluorescent lights above. On a chair is the boom box normally used to blast very loud music from the El Camino, but now is playing a CD of ocean sounds. PK stares at them for a moment before turning it off. Parka and Mr. Kalm, startled by the sudden loss of serenity, sit up and remove their sunglasses.*

 

Parka: Hey, PK, what’s up? Didn’t hear you come in.

 

PK: What the hell is this? We blew a chance at a Tag title shot AGAIN and you two are acting like you’re on some beach in the Bahamas?

 

Kalm: Maui, actually. It’s a relaxation technique designed to melt away any stress or anxiety one may have.

 

PK: You shut your mouth. It’s your fault this happened; if you didn’t stick your nose in our business, we’d be talking strategy on Los Infernales right now. AND WHERE THE HELL IS OUR MASSAGE LADY!?

 

Parka: Whoa, PK, cool down a bit. Yeah, I know where you’re coming from, man; I was pretty pissed at our loss last week too, but Eddy here has helped me suck in the happy *deep breath*, and blow out the pissed *exhales*. I feel great now. Besides, other chances will come around.

 

Kalm: And even though I don’t exactly think of this as a profession I’D want to enter, Leroy is now relaxed and ready to move on. I think it would do you worlds of good to try this exercise, Peter.

 

PK: What?! No! I’ve got other things to do.

 

Parka: I really think you should do this, PK. You seem a little tense. Just trust me on this one. You are just wasting energy getting so pissed off.

 

PK: (sighs) Fine.

 

Knight lays down on one of the towels and tries to relax while Parka turns the boom box back on. The ocean atmosphere fills the room again and Knight seems to relax a bit.

 

PK: Hey, not bad.

 

PK closes his eyes and lets his body go limp a bit

 

Kalm: Now relax. It’s a beautiful day out today, just a few clouds dancing in the deep blue sky. The water is crystal clear, sparkling like a million fallen stars. Not many people are here, just some co-eds on Spring Break playing volleyball right in front of you.

 

PK: Ooh, look at the bouncies. Oh, here comes a waitress. Hi, how are you? I’ll have a drink, but I want two umbrellas in the coconut, thank you.

 

Kalm: He’s fine. Let’s leave him alone and we’ll check on him after your match.

 

Parka and Eddy quietly leave and shut the door

 

PK: You girls want me to play? Thanks, I’ll play after I have my drink.

 

The door opens again and Candie and Calvin quietly enter. They slowly and carefully approach Knight and pick him up. Knight lays his head on Candie’s chest.

 

PK: Oh, a pillow. Thank you miss.

 

They carefully carry him out of the room. They pass Shattered Dreams on the way out...

 

 

....Shattered Dreams is seen standing in a hallway doing his favorite activity, talking on his cell phone. Presumably to a celebrity.

 

Dreams: Kate, Kate. Of course, I've seen the previews for "Alex and Emma." You look mega fabulous! I mean, you look stunning. When I saw you, I was like, is that Kate Hudson or is that an angel sent from heaven. Those camera angles totally bring out the sultry beauty of your eyes

 

(Kate says something)

 

Dreams: No, I don't say that to all the girls. Just the pretty ones.

 

(Kate says something)

 

Dreams: No way, you looked great as a brunette. I mean, you looked a little ugly. But like, in a cool sexy way.

 

(Dreams notices someone's tapping him on his shoulder. At first he ignores the person but the tapping gets harder. Finally, Dreams turns around and sees his ex-partner, The Parka starring at him)

 

Dreams: Kate, can ya hold a sec? Thanks, you're a sweetie.

 

(There's an awkward silence between the two wrestlers. Parka tries to say something, but the words won't come out. Growing impatient, Dreams decides to break the silence)

 

Dreams: Look, I've got Kate Hudson on the line, I've got like fourty voice mails from a guy down in Mexico, who says he can give me a nose job for twenty pesos and a pound of cocaine. I soooo don't have the time for a Dream Machines reunion. Like, is there something that you want, or have you come out of the closet and just enjoy staring at my gorgeous face?

 

(Parka nods his head as he tries to collect his thoughts)

 

Parka: I've come to talk to you. As you may know I've been seeing a uh....anger management counselor named Eddy. He's helping me to deal with my inner rage, and my um...my uh anger. He's really trying help me to become a better and more positive and responsible person....

 

Dreams: Ooookay. Ya know, I'm really happy you found someone who can bring out your inner child and make ya feel good about yourself. Really, I am. But like I said, I'm a teeny tiny bit busy right now. So, if you could just get to the part that has do with me, that would be great.

 

Parka: Um, all right. Eddy has, well he's helped to see some of the...damn it, I wish I brought a note card. Eddy's helped me to see some of the interpersonal mistakes I've made. In the past. He's been telling me that the anger I've directed towards people, is hurtful and it's....it's counterproductive. The things, I've said to you were very cruel, mean, childish and uncalled for. Well, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. I'm very sorry.

 

(Another silence. Parka lowers his head and begins to walk away. )

 

Dreams: Parka, wait!

 

(Parka stops and turns around)

 

Dreams: I'm still mad at you. But, that was really sweet and cool what you just said. I know we both have common enemies in Totally Endorsed. I think if we like, worked together against them and helped each other out, then that would go a long way towards making things better between us.

 

Parka: I'd like that very much.

 

(The two former team mates shake hands)

 

Dreams: Tell Peter I said hi. Good luck with the anger management. I'm very proud of you.

 

(scene fades to black)

 

-------------------------------------------

OAOAST Toast Commercial.

-------------------------------------------

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

(Parka and Eddy are seen walking through the halls talking on their way to the ring)

 

PARKA: Don't worry I'm totally focused for this match. That CD of children's songs really helped.

 

EDDY: There's nothing like "He's got the whole world in his hands" to make you happy.

 

(Parka suddenly stops walking and a look of anger appears on his face. The camera pans over to show the El Camino covered in graffiti and product stickers ranging from Pepsi to Feminine Products and a note taped to the window reading, "If you're not corporately backed...then down you'll get smacked!" Parka rips the note off and wads it up before throwing it)

 

PARKA: No one messes with the car!!! No one messes with my baby!!

 

EDDY: Easy Leroy. Breathe deep. Remember...123 Nothing's wrong with me...321 I love everyone!

 

PARKA

123 nothing's wrong with me...321 I love everyone...except Totally Endorsed!!!

 

EDDY

That...that will have to do for now. Let's go.

 

(Parka and Eddy walk to the ring leaving the El Camino in it's spot with the club on the steering wheel to keep it from being stolen)

 

COLE

It looks like Totally Endorsed got to Parka's car!

 

COACH

What makes you say that Cole?

 

CUE: California Love

 

(Parka walks out surprisingly to some cheers. Maybe it's because he's going against Terry Simmons. Eddy is getting into the moment and high fiving fans. Parka just gives him an odd look. They reach the ring and Parka steps in while Eddy stays on the outside. Parka is still not wearing the mask that he ripped apart)

 

COLE

Parka has stated that he will not wear the mask again until he feels he's a changed man. La Parka was a mentor to him when he wrestled in Mexico and Parka feels he's not worthy to wear it right now.

 

COACH

That's too bad. That mask was so cool. I wish I could have one of those.

 

COLE

So you can go trick or treating on Halloween without dressing like a woman for once?

 

CUE: Rock Your Body

 

(Terry Simmons comes out to a chorus of boos from the crowd. He is followed to the ring by Calvin, Colvid, and Candie. Eddy looks up at Parka a little worried and Parka just shrugs his shoulders as if to say, "You're mister calm. Why are you looking at me?")

 

COLE

Parka and Eddy are outnumbered and Parka told PK to stay in the back and relax.

 

COACH

Don't worry Cole, Parka's the man! I know he can do it.

 

Parka doesn't waste any time in hitting a Slingshot Plancha to the outside onto Simmons who falls back on top of Calvin. Parka grabs Simmons and rolls him into the ring.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

Parka then slingshots back into the ring with a Senton Splash. Cover

 

One

 

Two...No!!

 

COLE

Only a two count after a quick start by Parka.

 

Parka waits for Simmons to get up and hits a clothesline that does not knock him down. Parka runs to the ropes and hits another clothesline that somewhat staggers him. Parka goes for a third, but Simmons catches him and lifts him into a Press Slam position. Parka manages to fight his way out and drops behind him. He throws a couple of forearm shots to Simmons' back and then Low Dropkicks the back of Simmons' knee causing Simmons to almost fall, but he grabs the ropes to keep himself up. Parka hits the ropes and Chop Blocks Simmons down.

 

COLE

Parka is doing the smart thing and trying to take out Simmons' legs

 

COACH

I told ya he was the man!

 

Parka stands on the second turnbuckle and drops and elbow on Simmons' leg. He then grabs Simmons' leg and drags it to the bottom rope before dropping on it a couple of times. He goes to drop on it a third time, but Simmons gets his foot up and shoves Parka over the top rope with his foot. Parka hits the outside hard and Eddy comes over to check on him.

 

CALVIN

Ladies and Gentlemen if you go right now to your nearest concession stand you can buy ice cold Pepsi! Don't worry Terry here won't pin Parka till you get back. He's too busy having fun with him.

 

COLE

Hey Coach where are you going? You've got a job to do.

 

COACH

What? I was just stretching out. I wasn't going anywhere.

 

Simmons climbs out of the ring and grabs Parka. He picks him up and drops him across the guard rail and then rams his head into it a couple of times. Simmons then picks him up and tosses him on top of the Spanish Announce Table.

 

COLE

Look out Carlos and Hugo!

 

COACH

No no no Cole you have to say it like this, "Vamanos! Run for the border!"

 

COLE

That wasn't very nice!

 

The ref yells at Simmons to get it back in the ring, but Simmons ignores him and climbs on top of the table. Simmons picks him up and tries for a Baldo Bomb through the table, but Parka leans forward and bites Simmons on the forehead causing him to let go.

 

COLVID

Speaking of BITING (Colvid gives the ref a dirty look for allowing that) BITE into a York Peppermint Patty today! They're refreshingly good!

 

Parka jumps down from the table and stalks Calvin and Colvid around the ring. He grabs a chair and runs at the two men who run to the other side of the ring. Eddy tells Parka to calm down and get back on Simmons. Parka tosses the chair down and kicks Simmons in the gut as he tries to attack. The ref has come out to get the two men back in the ring when Candie comes up to the ref and offers him some Juicy Fruit Gum~! With the distraction Simmons Low Blows Parka and rolls him back in the ring. Calvin slides the chair into the ring and Simmons hits a Baldo Bomb on Parka onto the chair and then slides the chair back out. Candie tells the ref to get back in the ring. Cover

 

One

 

Two

 

Foot on the ropes!

 

COLE

Eddy put Parka's foot on the rope! If he hadn't done that Parka would have been pinned!

 

COACH

That's the least Eddy could do with the numbers being against Parka.

 

Candie comes around the ring and slaps the taste out of Eddy's mouth. Eddy oversells and falls to the ground holding his face before jumping up and grabbing Candie by the hair. The two start to catfight in a way before Calvin tells Candie to quit bothering with him. Simmons continues to work on Parka's back by giving him a Backbreaker, but he holds on and gives him another one before slamming him to the mat. Cover.

 

One

 

Two

 

Thr....No!!!

 

COLE

Barely kicks out!

 

Simmons picks Parka up and whips him to the ropes and goes for the Clothesline from Hell, but Parka ducks it. He comes up behind Simmons and rolls him up for a pin.

 

One

 

Two

 

No!!!

 

Simmons kicks out with authority and Parka quickly grabs him as he gets up and hits a Russian Leg Sweep, but the impact sends pain through Parka's back. Parka crawls over and drapes an arm over him.

 

One

 

Two

 

No!!!

 

Parka picks Simmons up and goes for a Backdrop Suplex, but the weight is too much for his back and Simmons falls on top of Parka for a pin.

 

One

 

Two

 

Thre...No!!!

 

COLE

Parka's back is hurt from the Baldo Bomb on the chair. He couldn't suplex Simmons.

 

COACH

He could use some...

 

CANDIE

Looks like Parka could use some Icy Hot! Icy Hot it's both cold and hot to soothe your aches and pains!

 

COACH

I was about to say that!

 

Simmons gets up and hits a Big Splash onto Parka. He picks Parka up and whips him to the corner. Simmons comes running in for an Big Splash in the corner, but Parka moves at the last second and Simmons hits hard. Parka with a dropkick to Simmons back. Simmons comes stumbling out of the corner and Parka hits a running clothesline that knocks Simmons down. Parka runs to the ropes but Calvin smacks Parka in the back with a chair as he hits the ropes. Candie had the ref distracted. Parka stumbles to the middle of the ring where Simmons hits a chokeslam. Cover.

 

One

 

Two

 

Three!!

 

COLE

That's it. The numbers were just to great for Parka!

 

YOUR WINNER IN 9:35 TERRY SIMMONS!

 

Totally Endorsed raise Simmons' arms in victory and walk to the back with smiles on their faces. Parka get's up dazed and swinging punches wildly in TE's direction. Eddy tries to calm him down.

 

Cole: Totally Endorsed ground out a win here. WThings are really starting to heat up...

 

Coach: What will happen next between these two teams?

 

-----------------------------------------------------

Zack Malibu highlights Package

-----------------------------------------------------

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

Meanwhile Backstage…some Mozart plays from a portable stereo as a camera catches The Amazing Rando sleeping on a couch. Through the magic of television, it’s time for a dream sequence…as they are all the rage these days::

 

(The scene goes from a purr fuzz to a crystal clear view of…Bayside High School? Rando has slipped into Saved By The Bell. Rando roams the halls, passing faceless punks before stepping into the cafeteria. Zack Morris…the perfect example of preppy-dom…is sitting at a table eating lunch. Rando believes he has found Malibu and approaches him with gleeful gusto)

 

Rando: Malibu…what’s up? What are you doing in this high school?

 

Morris: I go to school here…who’s this Malibu guy?

 

Rando: You are, dude…I love your fighting champion attitude!

 

Morris: What are you talking about, man?

 

Rando: What are YOU talking about?

 

Morris: Uhhh….Ummm…

 

Rando: Exactly…

 

(Rando smiles and chuckles as Screech moseys into the cafeteria. He is decked out in the latest Walmart Nerdwear fashion line, but still manages to look somewhat cool. Rando does a double take)

 

Rando: Malibu…it’s Stephen Joseph…kick his ass!

 

Morris: That’s Screech!

 

Rando: That’s such a funny name…and I never thought about it but his voice does screech a bit….now whoop his ass!

 

Morris: No…

 

(Screech walks over, carrying with him two burgers. Rando somehow is visioning Los Infernales being the burgers, so he grabs them and whips them across the cafeteria and into the hall. Screech is not pleased)

 

Screech: Who are you…and what the hell did you do that for?!

 

Rando: I’m the Amazing Rando…you should know me Joseph…and I just punked your little team…cause they were going to tear up Malibu!

 

Screech: Joseph? Malibu?

 

Morris: I don’t get it either.

 

Rando: What are you two doing…Zack…whoop his ass!

 

Morris: Why should I?

 

Rando: Well the other day I heard him call you a little wuss that couldn’t even take a punch!

 

Morris: Oh really…

 

(Screech looks confused)

 

Screech: I didn’t say…

 

Rando: Hey Joseph…and then Zack here was talking about how he’d always be the king and that nobody…not even YOU…can steal his thunder…

 

Screech: Oh really….

 

Morris: Wait…

 

(Screech does not wait…and instead throws a wicked punch and connects to Zack’s ear…for which Zack almost no-sells before he stands and begins throwing punches and kicks. A brawl breaks out and ends with Zack Morris actually hitting a Pollycutter on Screech. He is bloodied on the floor. Zack takes a sip from his milkshake. Rando laughs as Mario Lopez walks by)

 

Mario: Hello folks…make sure to check out Most Talented Kid! Check your local list….

 

(Rando does not let him finish his sentence as he dives off a nearby lunch table and kicks Mario in the head…sending him flying out of frame)

 

Morris: Why did you do that?!

 

Rando: I’m not letting that punk make any cameos in MY dreams!

 

Morris: Good move…

 

(Rando and Morris shake hands as the dream takes a wacky twist and switches to a Dirty Vegas video....”Days Go By” plays as Rando joins the guy in a little breakdancing)

 

Random guy: Wow…that guy has skills!

 

Rando: Damn straight…

 

Random girl: Let’s go get coffee!

 

Random guy: Okay…

 

(They leave and moments later Rando superkicks the breakdancing business man, steals his shoes, and fades out and back into conscious as he awakes on the couch…wearing the shoes)

 

::Rando leaps up and looks around oddly::

 

Rando: what the hell did I eat?

 

::Rando shakes it off and runs out of the room and gets to the ring and notices its emptiness. He motions behind the curtain and “Walk In My Shoes” by Finger Eleven plays and Rando waltzes out to the middle of the ring and grabs a mic::

 

Rando: When you wake up in the morning…

 

::The crowd pops…as that is still all the rage::

 

Rando: …You realize that there is nothing better than The Amazing Rando. No matter what your friends say…no matter what your family says…no matter what the Purist says…there is nothing better than ME! It’s the main reason you all want to be just like me…and I know that the Purist wants that too…and when School’s Out…he will be just like me! Only his impersonation of me won’t be done in the OAOAST. No no… if anything…they will be done in the privacy of his lockerroom or his home and he tries to capture the pure Rando-ness that I emit.

 

Believe it or not….Everybody…young or old, skinny or fat, smart or stupid, pure or unpure…you all want to be…

 

…Just…Like…ME~!

 

::The crowd explodes once more as “Walk In My Shoes” fades up again and Rando heads back into the dressing room to return to his nap and hopefully find that hot Kelly chic for a little lesson in the art of the Horizontal Bodylock.

 

Fade out...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

Meanwhile, back at the barber’s...

 

Matthews: I’m going to go in and try and grab a word...

 

Beard: Hello Mr Shearer just my usual side to side up and down scum on the run treatment.

 

Alan Shearer: Hey only the best for my number 1 wrestler.

 

Matthews: There seems to be a comotion outside but ‘The Beard’ is having trouble focusing due to the hefty spliff he smoked earlier. I’ll have more a bit later...

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Once again we go backstage...

 

Parka, along with Eddy, walks through the halls, looking in every open door for his partner, who had disappeared when they returned to the locker room.

 

Parka (poking head in open door):

 

Hey, you guys seen PK? No? Damn.

 

They continue walking until Crystal, wearing only a towel, walks up to them

 

Crystal:

 

Hey, I found your partner. I was about to take a shower when I found him laying on the floor muttering things like “What’s your major?” and making swatting motions with his hands. Get him out of there.

 

They walk into the women’s showers and find Knight laying on the floor, plastered with logos from Nike, Levi, Pringles and, of course, Pepsi

 

PK:

 

No, I’ve never played strip volleyball before, how does it go?

 

*Parka turns on one of the shower heads and water falls onto PK’s face*

 

PK:

 

Oh no, it’s starting to rain. Quick, everyone to my room to wait this *snaps out of it*……what the hell? Where am I? *Looks at himself* What? Where’d all this come from? Am I a billboard now?

 

Parka:

 

The same thing happened to the car. I’ll give you three guesses and they all are Totally Endorsed.

 

PK:

 

Great, I agree to listen to that STUPID Ocean CD of yours and I end up like this. That’s it, I’m sick of it. We’re doing things my way now. Just let me clean all this crap off. *Looks at Crystal* Nice game.

 

The men walk off, leaving Crystal alone.

 

Fade...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

Cole: What a match we’ve got for you now, the two most prominent females in the OAOAST are goignto get it on right now!

 

Coach: Yeah this has been building for some time now, and maybe tonight will have a winner!?

 

The haunting beginning of "Imaginary" airs over the sound system in the arena, as the newly seperated Black Widow makes her way out to a positive response. The former valet for SpiderPoet, she now resides completely on HeldDOWN, free of that madman's control.

 

Widow's theme fades into nothingness, and red strobe lights start going off in the arena, a much more perky beat heard throughout it. "Just A Girl" by No Doubt brings out Crystal, who gets a huge pop upon entering the arena!

 

MC:"Let's take you back to last week, and show you just how close this young lady came to becoming the first EVER female World Champion!"

 

*Various clips are shown of Crystal vs. Zack Malibu, including Crystal getting near fall after near fall*

 

Coach:"You know, I like Zack as much as the next guy, but what a great moment it would have been for Crystal to get the title."

 

MC:"You're just saying that because you've got a thing for her. In fact, you seem to have a thing for ALL the hD females."

 

Coach:"...do not..."

 

In the ring, Crystal stretches in the corner, as her music fades out. Widow stands on the opposite side of the ring, watching her. The bell rings, and the first bout in our best of 3 series is underway!

 

Widow and Crystal slap hands as a sign of respect, and circle each other. Widow teases a lockup at first, but then goes behind Crystal, cinching in a waistlock. Crystal pulls her hands apart, slipping out of the move, and then dropping down, swiping her arm under Widow's legs and bringing her to the mat. Crystal covers, but Widow easily gets a shoulder up at one. Crystal picks her up, and twists her arm, holding her in an armlock, but Widow reaches out, grabs Crystal's arm, and counters with an armlock of her own. Crystal writhes in pain for a second, then turns so that she's face to face with Widow while in the hold, and kicks Widow in the bread basket. Crystal then hits the ropes, and grabs Widow as she comes off, snapping her to the mat with a swinging neckbreaker! Another cover, this time Crystal hooks the leg...only a two count on Black Widow!

 

Crystal allows Widow time to get up, and when she does, Crystal slaps her chest HARD with a chop. Widow flinches, but then responds with one of equal stiffness, sending Crystal back a few steps. As Crystal turns back to her, Widow takes her over with a headlock takedown, but before she can get a good grip, Crystal kicks her legs up, grabbing Widow's head in a legscissors. Crystal breaks the hold, rolls onto her stomach, and pushes herself up off the mat, just as Widow is coming at her. She hiptosses Widow over, but Widow lands on her feet, and hits Crystal with a hiptoss of her own! Widow picks up Crystal, bodyslamming her down near the ropes, and keeps her in that position. Widow then stands by the ropes, facing out to the crowd, and grabs the top rope. She leaps up, her feet springing off the second rope, and kicks her legs out, landing on Crystal with a springboard variation of a Vader Bomb! Widow covers, but Crystal kicks out of the attempted pin!

 

Widow picks Crystal up off the mat, and readies her for a powerbomb. She lifts Crystal up on her shoulders, but Crystal starts hammering away, and then shifts momentum, taking Widow over with a huracanrana! Widow slides out to the floor, and Crystal pushes herself up. She runs to the ropes, rebounding off the far side and then leaping up and over the top rope, soaring right over it, and down onto Widow!

 

MC:"WOW! That was beautiful!"

 

Coach:"Oh, so I can't hit on them, but you can?"

 

MC:"I meant the DIVE, Coach."

 

Crystal catches her wind, pushing her hair up out of her face, while many fans begin a Crystal chant that continues to grow. She picks Widow up and rolls her in under the bottom rope. With Widow laying down, Crystal slingshots in with a senton, a la Eddy Guerrero! Crystal quickly goes for a cover, but before the referee counts three, he lifts his head and sees Widow's foot on the ropes!

 

MC:"Excellent move, Widow knew where she was at, and it kept her in this match!"

 

Crystal gets up off Widow, huffing and puffing a bit due to the fast pace of this match. She goes to pick Widow up again, but Widow cradles her! The referee quickly slides to the mat! Crystal kicks out at 2!

 

What a close call! Crystal and Widow are now both back up to their feet. Widow runs the ropes, and Crystal gets her coming off the ropes with a backdrop, but Widow lands on her feet, and schoolboys Crystal! Another quick cover...ANOTHER KICKOUT!

 

Crystal rolls right to her feet, ducking an oncoming Widow and running to the opposite side. She comes off the ropes with a spinning wheel kick, taking Widow out of her boots! Crystal covers her for what seems like the millionth time this match...and Widow kicks out again!

 

MC:"What an effort by these two tonight!"

 

Crystal bends her knees, positioning herself for when Widow gets up. Widow makes it to her feet, and Crystal springs off the canvas, up onto Widow's shoulders with a huracanrana, but Widow blocks it! She carries Crystal over to the turnbuckles, and places her on the top rope. Widow climbs up as well, and jumps up, taking Crystal over with a top rope huracanrana...COUNTERED IN MID AIR BY CRYSTAL INTO A SITOUT POWERBOMB!

 

Coach:"WOW!"

 

Fans throughout the arena start chanting, some chant "Crystal" while others chant "Holy Shit!" After laying on the mat for a few seconds, Crystal gets up, and without waiting any longer, hops over Widow's fallen body, and jumps up to the second, then the third rope...Diamond In The Rough! Crystal lands right on Widow! Crystal hooks the leg, and this time the referee's count finally makes it to three!

 

Winner:Crystal in 6:45

 

"Just A Girl" plays, as the Female Phenom of HeldDOWN is 1-0 in this best of three series. After having her hand raised, Crystal turns to Widow and helps her up. The two ladies hug, showing their newfound respect for each other to the world. Widow raises Crystal's hand, and both women exit together, as they should both be proud of their efforts.

 

---------------------------------------------------------

 

Back At The Barber’s...

 

Smash, there goes the front window, on the floor lies a battered and bleeding Marti Jannetty!

The beard dosn't look happy. 1/18 of his beard has been sliced off, Jannetty gets to his feet CRASH BANG WALLOP good night vienna!

The Beard has sent Marti flying to lala land!

 

Cole: Oh my what a show of brutality from ‘The Beard’. I wouldn't wanna piss him off! Or touch that gorgeous beard!

 

Coach: Look out, he is coming to the arena in that 4 x 4 beast of a trolley!

 

Fade To Commercial

 

-----------------------------------------------

OAOAST Spandex Commercial

-----------------------------------------------

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

Back from commercial, we go to the commissioner’s office...

 

Anglesault is seen entering the office...

 

Anglesault: Cleft, I need to talk to you.

 

Moysey: *annoyed look* Yeah, what do you want?

 

AS: I want Some Guy.

 

Moysey: Heh, I'm sure you do.

 

AS: I'm serious, and you're the only one who can make it happen.

 

Moysey: And give me one good reason why the hell should I help you.

 

AS: Well, if you don't give me what I want, you'll find out why you should have.

 

Moysey: Oh great, now you're threatening me. You know, I can make your life a living hell if I wanted to. I could have you

fighting every Johnny Nobody in every backalley bar-room across the country. I could make sure that no one remembers who you are, that you are forgotten by everyone of the OAOAST's fans. I can make you NOTHING. Do you understand that? NOTHING! I hold your future in my hands, and I suggest that you not threaten me if you don't want all the hard work you've done here to be forgotten just like that *snaps fingers*.

 

AS: *backs off* Hey, I just want a match against SG, and you're the only one around here who can make that happen.

 

Some Guy comes into view

 

SG: What's going on here?

 

Moysey: My friend Mr. Anglesault here wants a match with you. What do you think?

 

SG: Well, if he's willing, so am I.

 

Moysey: Well then it's settled, he's all your's. You guys name the time and the place.

 

AS: That's all I wanted.

 

Fade.

 

---------------------------------------------------

Boogie Knights 2K3 Highlights Video

---------------------------------------------------

 

The show returns to the men’s bathroom...

 

Beard: Damn, I thought I was going to burst. Now to wash my hands.

 

[the Beard approaches the sink when Andre the Midget walks in]

 

ATM: Well, well, I thought I heard someone queefing. So what brings you here? Monthly bleeding time?

 

Beard: You're insulting my masculinity? At least I don't bite other men's penises. That's really gay.

 

ATM: Hey when you have my stepfathers, you learn to adapt.

 

Beard: What the fuck does that mean?! You're a sick freak man. Don't mess with me shorty, I'm the next small thing.

 

ATM: Dammit! I'm the next little thing. I'm the one who going to take this 2-bit fed by storm.

 

Beard: Yeah right, you're a fucking joke. Midgets are useful only for comedy relief, nothing more. Now run along and play with Doink or whatever.

 

ATM: Listen Dorothy, I can take on any jackoff here. For christ's sake, our champion has a gimmick based on that fa-

 

[the Beard kicks ATM in the gut]

 

Beard: Kiss my ass you slag. You can't handle me.

 

[Pedro Roma runs in with ATM's hammer, nailing Beard in the back several times]

 

Pedro: Come on kid, you know the drill.

 

[Pedro and Andre place their foe's face in a urinal]

 

ATM: Damn, I really have to piss. Lift me up.

 

Pedro: I don't know-

 

ATm: Please

 

Pedro: Well ok.

 

[Pedro lifts the midget, allowing him to use the urinal that just happens to have the Beard's face in it]

 

Fade...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

MC:"Welcome back. Hey Coach, look at this!"

 

Coming down the aisle is a man, clad in jean shorts and a plaid button down shirt. His long black hair is slicked back, tied in a ponytail.

 

Coach:"Is that...that's Starbearer!"

 

MC:"He doesn't appear to be himself tonight."

 

Starbearer steps into the ring, and asks for the mic from the announcer.

 

S:"People, I promise not to take up to much of your time. For those of you who may not recognize me sans my makeup and glitter, it's me, The Starbearer, and I've got something I'd like to say."

 

The crowd gives a somewhat polite response, as usually Starbearer is obnoxiously cocky.

 

S:"What I want to share with you tonight is a revelation that I've had. You see, I wasn't on the format tonight because I've been taking some time off...some time to spend with my new child, whom I recently welcomed into this world."

 

The crowd starts cheering louder, congratulating him. Paul looks out and mouths "Thank you".

 

S:"And when I looked into my child's eyes, I realized something. I realized that what I was doing, what I THOUGHT I was doing, was entertaining all of you. It turns out I was just entertaining myself by being such a flaunt. I put my ego above everything, and I can't erase the past."

 

The crowd is somewhat quiet, unsure of where this is going.

 

S:"But when I looked into the eyes of my son, tears fell from my eyes. I realized that I brought a beautiful human being into this world, someone who will grow to depend on me. And I want each of you people to know that I want all of YOU to depend on me from now on, for quality entertainment here on HeldDOWN!"

 

The crowd starts cheering a bit louder.

 

MC:"Wow, it seems like Paul Stanley has had quite the change of heart here tonight."

 

Coach:"Ssh, I don't think he's done."

 

Starbearer seems moved by the reaction, he continues to speak.

 

S:"So to my fans, to the OAOAST fans, to Foshi, to everyone, what you will be seeing in the next few weeks is a new..."

 

WHACK!

 

MC:"Who the hell!?"

 

As Starbearer was speaking, a masked man entered the ring, and clobbered him with...a book!? Stanley falls to the mat, holding his head, and is dragged out to the floor by the masked man.

 

MC:"What is this, this isn't right!"

 

The masked man sets Paul up, and without hesitation, plants him headfirst on the floor with a piledriver!

 

Coach:"Good lord, someone get some help out there!"

 

Paul lay motionless on the floor, as the masked individual jumps the rail and runs through the crowd, clutching the book used to nail Paul from behind. Security and EMT's come out to check on Starbearer, as we cut to break.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

Cole: Welcome back to HeldDown, what a show it’s been so far...

 

The Lights Go Out.

 

Coach: And Business just picked up again!

 

Audioslave’s Cochise blares out over the speakers, as the crowd roars and Caboose lowers from the rafters directly into the ring.

 

Cole: Listen to this ovation!

 

Coach: Since coming back Caboose has laid down the law and sent a message to Stephen Joseph and he’s only been back two weeks!

 

Caboose detaches himself from his harness and is handed a mic by the ringside security.

 

Caboose: It feels good to be back!...

 

The lights go out again.

 

Cole: What the hell? Caboose is already out here.

 

Coach: Look at that!

 

A giant Warrior signal is being projected on the HeldTron.

 

Caboose: Come on MISTER WARRIOR, where are you? Show your face!

 

MISTER WARRIOR appears on the HeldTron.

 

MISTER WARRIOR: I am right here Caboose. Come and find me Caboose. I’m waiting for you Caboose.

 

Caboose: Why should I come and find you?

 

MISTER WARRIOR: Because of this Caboose.

 

MISTER WARRIOR holds up a picture of a middle-aged man and holds it over a fire.

 

Caboose: You sonofabitch! You already killed him once! Just let him rest in peace!

 

Caboose drops the mic and rushes up the entrance ramp and through the curtains.

 

Cole: We are going to try and get a camera to follow Caboose!...

 

Coach: I guess, MISTER WARRIOR was holding a picture of Caboose’s father!

 

Caboose is seen frantically running around backstage barging through doors shouting...

 

Caboose: WHERE ARE YOU WARRIOR! I’M GOING TO KILL YOU!

 

Caboose sees his dressing room door, and charges shoulder first through it!

 

Inside stands MISTER WARRIOR brandishing the picture of Caboose’s father over the fire.

 

Caboose: You do it and I’ll going to kill you!

 

MISTER WARRIOR: You cannot kill me Caboose. I own your soul Caboose.

 

Caboose: Please don’t do it!

 

MISTER WARRIOR: It is the only way Caboose.

 

Caboose: Nooooooooooooooooooooooo!!

 

MISTER WARRIOR lowers the picture and drops it into the fire.

 

Caboose drops to his knees and starts to cry.

 

MISTER WARRIOR: See Caboose. I control you now Caboose. You are mine Caboose.

 

Caboose gets upto his feet, still visibly upset turns around and calmly says...

 

Caboose: You’ve done it now. You went too far. You killed my father, I let it slide. You shoulderblocked that kid, I let it go. But you just destroyed a very expensive frame. Now your going to pay.

 

MISTER WARRIOR: Let the anger consume you Caboose. Only then will you realise your full powers Caboose.

 

Caboose: I’m not angry, i’m mildly perturbed.

 

MISTER WARRIOR: So be it Caboose. I will have to destropy you instead Caboose.

 

Caboose: We will see.

 

MISTER WARRIOR turns around and leaves through the door, but then steps back into the room.

 

MISTER WARRIOR: Sorry, I meant...

 

MISTER WARRIOR beats his chest, roars and SHOULDERBLOCKS through the wall.

 

Caboose: We will see.

 

Fade...

 

-----------------------------------

 

The screen suddenly becomes static. Nothing is visible through the snow, until footage starts to blurb, as if a signal is trying to get through. Footage becomes visible, though it is in black and white. The quality is grainy and somewhat snowy, as if watching on an old UHF TV. A man is sitting, facing the screen, looking wild-eyed and zoned out.

 

"Hi friends. You can call me Hex. You don't know me yet, but you will. I'm on my way right now, I'll be there soon, and when I arrive, your show is mine... I'll... kick... all your asses... or something. Click, click, whirr... I'm a robot. Well, until then, live those dreams, scheme those schemes, you gotta hit me... hit me... hit me, hit me... hit me with those laser beams."

 

-----------------------------------

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

This week's number one song on the Billboard Hot 100, "Get Busy" by Sean Paul, begins to blast over the Down's Syndrome Stereo System, and as the smooth sounds begin to filter into the arena the crowd boos (save for the femme fatales dancing in the crowd). The foursome representing Totally Endorsed on this night walk down to the ring, Calvin Szechstein heading the charge with the 24/7 title wrapped around his waist, Slacker and Colvid following behind and handing out samples (tonight of Vanilla Pepsi - more vanilla than Coke!) and Candie bringing up the rear, representing Abercrombie's new line of spaghetti strings! The four slide into the ring, doing the twenty-second pose before breaking off, Slacker and Colvid beginning to spar while Calvin wraps a brotherly arm around Candie's shoulder, giving her some motivation.

 

"Fighter" by Christina Aguilera starts up, and the crowd leap to their feet in anticipation of Shattered Dreams! The flamboyant favorite comes storming out of the crowd, none too happy with the recent actions of The Slacker. After making it through his legions of ffans, including girls that were clamoring to even graze past him, Dreams hops over the guardrail to ringside. He slides into the ring, doing some Shawn Michaels-esque posing, as TE look on, mouthing words of hatred under their breath.

 

Dreams stands on one side of the ring, having a staredown with TE, as his music fades into the entrance music of his partner in this match. "Kickstart My Heart" by Motley Crue draws another pop from the crowd, as one of HeldDOWN's top prospects, K Money, comes roaring out! Money, coming out holding Josie's hand, lets go of his girlfriend/valet, and charges the ring like Dreams did, hopping up on the apron and slingshotting himself over the top rope, into the ring. Money does a bit of stretching, never taking his eyes off TE while he does.

 

"Kickstart my Heart" stops completely, and all the lights in the arena shut down.

 

"How can you see into my eyes, like open doors..."

 

(The HeldTron video begins playing, drawing a great response from the fans)

 

"Leading you down into my core, where I've become so numb..."

 

Suddenly, with the lights out during the entrance, TE attacks Money and Dreams! Candie steps to the apron, while Calvin backs Money into the corner, hammering away on him. Colvid and Slacker start doubling up on Dreams, until...

 

BOOM!

 

WAKE ME UP

 

Wake me up inside

 

I CAN'T WAKE UP

 

Wake me up inside

 

SAVE ME

 

Call my name and save me from the dark

 

Indeed, much like the words of "Bring Me To Life", Zack Malibu and Alison come racing out of the back to assist their partners! Zack slides into the ring, where Colvid meets him with a stomp to keep him down. He picks Zack up, and grabs his arm, trying an Irish Whip, but Zack counters, twisting back around and kicking Colvid in the gut. He grabs him in a facelock, then lifts him up suplex style, and drapes him across the top rope! Colvid hangs for a minute, then gets his footing on the apron, only to be dropkicked to the floor by Zack! K Money backdrops Calvin over the top to the floor, while Slacker bails as Dreams makes a comeback. TE regroups on the outside, while the babyfaces congratulate each other and do some posing for the fans.

 

TE pull themselves back up on the apron, and talk strategy. Zack and Shattered Dreams join Alison on the apron, as K Money is going to start off for his team. Calvin opts to be the start-off man for TE, and the official calls for the bell.

 

K Money and Calvin meet in the center of the ring, and jawjack a bit. Josie is heard cheering "Let's Go Ken!" at ringside, causing Calvin to turn and raise an eyebrow at her. With the cameras in close Calvin utters "You've got as much taste as a rice cake, available now a...CRACK!" Money slapped the taste out of Calvin's mouth! Calvin comes back with a punch, blocked by Money, and he starts to let loose on Calvin! Money backs him up to the ropes, but when he goes for a final blow (a la The Rock), Calvin ducks under it. He kicks Money in the gut, and grabs him by the head throwing his body back so that it rebounds off the ropes, all the while holding his head, then driving him into the mat with a facebuster! Calvin picks him up off the mat, holding his left arm in an armlock, and hammering on his shoulder area. Money gets back to his feet, and flips forward, countering the hold and sending Calvin crashing to the mat with an arm drag! Calvin comes at him and gets hiptossed, but then Calvin counters with that same move when Money runs at him. They both get to their feet, and Money runs forward, then slides through Calvin's legs. With Calvin's back to him as he gets up, Money pulls his legs out from under him, sending him facefirst to the mat! K Money then grabs a side headlock (Crossface style) and squeezes on Cal's temple, but the TE leader makes it to his feet. He tries lifting Money up, but Money shifts his weight forward, and pulls Cal back to the mat with a headlock takedown! After a few seconds, Money rolls away from Calvin, and bounces off the ropes. Calvin rolls onto his stomach, making Money hop over him, and then as Money comes back off the ropes, Calvin jumps up and catches him with a picture perfect huracanrana, brought to you by Universal Studios release of The Hulk, coming to a theater near you on June 20th. While Money pulls himself up, Calvin goes and makes the tag, bringing in The Slacker.

 

Slacker comes in while Money is just getting up, running at him and elbowing him in the back of the head. K Money falls forward, hanging over the top rope, and Slacker pushes down on him, choking him on the top rope! The ref admonishes Slacker, who backs off without a fight. Then, as K Money turns to face his opponent, he gets clotheslined out of the ring by Slacks!

 

Coach:"K Money has been taking quite a beating in the early goings here. TE obviously has all their opponents well scouted."

 

MC:"There's no denying that. Also, lets not forget that this is not the first 8 Man tag that TE has been in, as they were victorious in the Elimination 8 Man several weeks ago. While the team of Dreams, Money and Zack and Alison are friends, this is their first time as a unit. The edge, whether you like it or not, goes to Calvin and his crew.:

 

K Money tries to land on his feet, but stumbles backwards, winded. Josie comes over to check on him, drawing Slacker out to the floor for some intimidation. He tells her that for her next outfit, she should try an ensemble from J Lo, available at Macy's and other fine department stores. During his tirade, Shattered Dreams jumps off the apron, getting in front of Josie and causing the Slacker to back up. While Slacks retreats to the ring, K Money already has, and he's close to his corner. K Money makes the tag, to Zack Malibu!

 

The OAOAST World Champion comes in, and Slacker complains to the ref that the tag shouldn't count, as he was on the floor. The ref says it's all good, and Zack measures up Slacker. The two lock up, and Zack plants both of his feet on Slacker's chest, taking him over with a monkey flip! Slacker gets up, and heads for Zack again. Zack tries a spin kick, but Slacker ducks, and instinctively grabs Zack's legs, then flips forward, pinning Zack with a bridge...quick 2 Count! Zack gets up, and catches a boot from Slacker, who attempts an enzugiri, but Zack ducks that! Zack grabs Slacker by the legs, and looks out to the crowd for approval, before whiplashing him backwards with a wheelbarrow suplex! Slacker rolls over in a daze, while Zack poses for the crowd! Slacker reaches his corner, and tags in...Candie!

 

Candie comes in, and calls Zack on! She calls for a lockup, but Zack won't do it.

 

MC:"Fighting Crystal last week was one thing. This is completely different. Zack won't treat a girl like that."

 

After Zack's numerous refusals, Candie tries to slap him, but he catches her arm! Zack raises his hand to her, and...REACHES OUT AND TAGS ALISON!

 

Alison comes in and charges at Candie, taking her down to the mat! The girls roll around on the mat for a bit, and somewhere out there, Joey Styles marks out for the CATFIGHT~!

 

Both girls get to their feet, still clawing at each other, and Alison tosses Candie across the ring by her hair! Alison eyes her, and slaps her leg, signalling for a School's Out! Candie is just about to stand, but Colvid hops off the apron and to the floor, and pulls Candie out under the bottom rope, sparing her!

 

The crowd hurls boos and insults at Colvid and Candie for being such cowards. While they are distracted by the taunts of the fans, Alison walks over to the ropes, and launches herself over onto them with a pescado! With TE down, Alison rolls back into the ring and celebrates, and tags in Shattered Dreams by giving him a high-five!

 

Dreams has Colvid in his sights, and he darts across the ring, sliding under the bottom rope and catching the Coliseum Video Spokesperson with a baseball slide that sends him stumbling backwards to the guardrail. Dreams picks up Candie and rolls her back in, and follows suit.

 

MC:"Is Dreams going to wrestle with Candie now, or is he gonna let her tag out?"

 

Coach:"I'd wrestle with her."

 

MC:"We know you would. Her consenting to that is a different story."

 

Dreams picks Candie up with a sly smile on his face. He then puts her over his knee, and raises his hand up, palm out, showing that a spanking is inevitable!

 

Coach:"Oh man!"

 

MC:"Easy killer. We'll have to call you Pilsbury, since you're Poppin' Fresh right now."

 

Before Dreams can lay a slap on Candie's behind, he's met with a swift kick to the face by Calvin, who comes in to break it up. Cal drags Candie towards the TE corner, and allows her to tag in Colvid. He grabs Dreams before he can get to both feet, and rocks him with a snap suplex. Colvid floats over on the move, so that he's laying across SD in a pinning predicament...2 Count only!

 

Colvid picks Dreams up, and send him into the corner, then follows up with a running shoulderblock to the ribs. SD slumps down, but Colvid grabs him by the jaw, standing him back up, and then slapping his chest with a chop! SD reels, and brings his arms in close to block any further shots, but Colvid pries them away and delivers another chop that echoes throughout the building. He pulls SD out of the corner, and SD breaks the hold and starts fighting back! A flurry of punches stagger Colvid, but SD is stopped in his tracks by a quick knee to the gut. Colvid sends him to the ropes, and what Colvid misses is SD tagging in K Money! Colvid ducks so that Dreams can leapfrog over him, but Dreams kicks him in the chin, sending him back to a vertical position, and setting him up for Money to springboard off the top with a dropkick! Money covers, hooking the leg...JUST A 2!

 

K Money continues on offense, picking Colvid up. He grabs him suplex style, but changes Colvid's position in midair, sitting out with the move and dropping Colvid on his back with a Falcon Arrow! Money rolls away, and jumps up to his feet. With Colvid down, he slings himself up onto the top rope, and floats backwards, landing on him with a Split Legged Moonsault! Again, Money hooks the leg...COLVID KICKS OUT AT 2!

 

MC:"Nice resilience by Colvid."

 

Coach:"TE is still in this. K Money is great at pulling off high impact manuevers, but he can't go to the well too often."

 

Money seems flustered that Colvid has withstood his onslaught thus far. He goes to pick him up, but Colvid grabs him by the waistband of his tights and sends him falling through the middle ropes and outside to the floor. Money nearly lands on his face, his hand cushioning the impact just in time. Colvid starts talking with the ref, providing the distraction while TE hit the floor.

 

K Money is being helped up by Josie, but suddenly she shrieks and jumps back, as Calvin floors him with a lariat to the back of his head. Slacker and Cal each grab an arm on K Money and pull him up off the floor violently, and whip him backwards into the guardrail! While taunting K Money, Slacker and Cal don't see Zack and Shattered Dreams each ascending the ropes...STEREO SUICIDE DIVES ONTO TOTALLY ENDORSED!

 

Calvin and Slacker got wiped out by Zack and Dreams respectively! K Money goes to reenter the ring, but Colvid comes to meet him. Colvid tries a shoulderblock through the ropes, but Money jumps up, and comes down on the back of his head with a legdrop! Colvid hangs across the bottom rope, as Money slingshots over the ropes, flipping into the ring and striking a quick pose for the fans! He catches a dazed Colvid staggering towards him, and grips him in a bearhug. K Money lifts Colvid off his feet while in the hold, and turns around, and Zack comes springing off the top with a clothesline that wipes the video man out! Covlid is sprawled on the mat, while TE, who have been ordered back to their corner, look on in displeasure.

 

Zack retreats back to the corner, only to have K Money come in and tag him in. He goes to pick up Covlid, only to be hit low, a desperation tactic by the TE member! Colvid crawls to his corner, and tags in Calvin Szechstein, who perches himself on the second rope and comes off with a Summer Blockbuster, brought to you by New Line Cinema! Calvin stomps on Zack, then picks him up in a facelock...Snickers Crunch DDT...NO!...Zack counters with Northern Lights Suplex! 1...2...BRIDGE OUT BY CALVIN! He pushes himself up, and twists, so that now he's got Zack in a standing bodyscissors. He lifts him for a powerbomb...Counter into a sunset flip...NO! Calvin keeps his balance, and fires a fistdrop at Zack...Zack slides out from under him, and Calvin hits canvas! Cal tries to shake the pain out of his hand, and as he does, Zack bounces off the ropes...Zack Attack! Calvin falls to the mat, and Zack covers him...Broken Up by Slacker!

 

Zack, who has had it with the cheap tactics of TE tonight, grabs Slacker and pulls him into the ring the hard way! Slacker begs off, seemingly in shock that he's drawn much ire from the World Champion! As Slacker backs up, he backs up into Shattered Dreams. After a tap on the shoulder to get him to turn around, Zack and SD play "Monkey in the Middle", each taking a shot at Slacker and sending him stumbling in the opposite direction. After a minute or so of this, both SD and Zack grab Slacker, and flatten him with a double team Russian Legsweep! Zack rolls off him, and turns his attention back to Calvin, and winds up walking right into a spinebuster! With Zack down, Calvin calls for Colvid to enter the ring. Col rushes in, and ducks down in front of the laid out World Champion, while Calvin runs the ropes, and comes off, getting backdropped over by Colvid and crushing Zack with their patented Backdrop Senton Bomb! Calvin and Colvid gloat, and are all smiles, then turn to see K Money leap off the top with a somersault senton bodyblock, taking them both out! It's K Money's turn to gloat now, except the fans love it, and eat it up with a spoon. As he turns, he sees Slacker charging him, and ducks, backdropping him over the top rope! Slacker lands on the apron, and grabs K Money by the head, jumping to the floor and pulling Money's neck down on the top rope! Money flops to the mat, gasping for air, and ultimately rolling to the floor.

 

With Calvin, Colvid and Money all wiped out, a groggy Zack struggles to tag in either Alison or Shattered Dreams. Slacker takes his place on the apron next to Candie, and waits on a tag from Calvin, as does she. Zack finally makes it to his corner, tagging in Dreams, while Calvin tags in Slacker at the same time.

 

The two men rush towards the center of the ring, then stop short, their eyes meeting. Slacker mumbles something, then tries a haymaker, but SD ducks, then catches Slacks with a backkick that sends him stumbling into the corner. SD follows up by charging and leaping at him with a Stinger Splash, and Slacks comes inching out of the corner before doing a Flair Flop, landing face first on the canvas! Shattered Dreams makes the cover, and AGAIN the count is broken up by TE.

 

That's seemingly the last straw, as Zack and a recovered K Money enter the ring. It's a Pier 6 Brawl! It's Breaking Loose in Tulsa! It's...well, you get the point! K Money whips Calvin into the corner, and follows it up with DR. SMOOTH'S SECRET RECIPE! Calvin comes charging out with a lariat, but K Money ducks and Cal runs right into a School's Out! Money and Zack then team up again, and double clothesline Colvid out to the floor! The fans are on their feet, as the crowd favorites are turning it up a notch here tonight!

 

During the confusion, Slacker rolls out of the ring, with Shattered Dreams in hot pursuit. They brawl at ringside, and Dreams lands a shot that sends Slacker sprawled out onto the timekeepers table! Slacker begs off, and starts to slowly get up, and then lunges forward...NAILING SD IN THE FACE WITH CALVIN'S 24/7 TITLE! Dreams clutches his nose, blood visible on his fingers, and rolls into the ring.

 

A quick cut to backstage shows The Dream Machines watching this on a monitor.

 

PK:"All right, that's it. I'm about to endorse a beating on those chumpstains."

 

Parka:"Man, I haven't even finished my Coke..."

 

PK turns to Parka. Parka tosses his drink in a trash can.

 

Parka:"Let's go."

 

(back to full view of the ring)

 

MC:"I don't think TE is gonna like this..."

 

Within seconds, Peter Knight and The Parka come racing from the back. Calvin sees this, and grabs his 24/7 title from ringside, trying to escape through the crowd, but is caught by PK! Parka takes Colvid, and we have a brawl!

 

Coach:"Katie, bar the door!"

 

MC:"OK now you're just trying too hard."

 

Back in the ring, Dreams is on his knees in the ring, trying to stop the blood flow. Slacker comes back in behind him, and pulls his head back into a Dragon Sleeper! Slacker pulls SD to his feet, and is going for THE SLACK OFF...NO! Dreams jumps up, kicking his feet off the corner...WAIT! COUNTER INTO A STUNNER IN MIDAIR~! SLACKER GOT HIS MOVE OFF!

 

MC:"Did you SEE that, Coach! Dreams tried to kick his weight back onto Slacker, but Slacks managed to twist him in midair to finish the Slack Off!"

 

Coach:"But did you see how he hit it!? SD's whole face came right down on his shoulder! That cannot be good for SD's injured nose!"

 

Dreams is yelling in pain on the mat, as Slacker looks down on him. Suddenly, a smug, almost cocky look comes over Slacker's face. He walks over, and calmly tags in CANDIE!

 

MC:"Go for the pin already! Why do more damage!"

 

Candie comes in, and immediately covers Shattered Dreams!

 

1...

2...

3!!!

 

Winners:Totally Endorsed in 17:22 (Candie pins SD after Slacker's Slack-Off.)

 

Candie jumps for joy over the win, as Slacker also does. Calvin and Colvid get pried away from The Dream Machines by security, and regroup with their teammates. TE bails out of the ringside area quickly, as the face side storm into the ring, with Zack calling for help for his fallen friend. "Get Busy" plays over the loudspeakers, as TE walk back up the aisle, dazed, confused, but victorious. The Dream Machines slowly follow, as both Parka and Knight still have a score to settle with Colvid and Calvin.

 

Fade...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

We come to Michael Cole in a studio.

 

Cole: Welcome back, this next part of the show was supposed to be the Boogie Knights Video package but it was pulled from airing as a redult of legal intervention...

 

Suddenly the feed cuts out...

 

In black and white, Kotzenjunge appears on the screen holding a video.

 

Kotzenjunge: I know, I know. Our segment got pulled because of the lawyers, and they took the tape away from us. But that doesn’t mean we didn’t make a copy! So here you have it, in all it’s illegal glory, The Boogie Knights having some fun!...

 

In colour....

 

“Connecting~!”

 

Komodo begins and the Knights appear onstage, not dancing, but in suits and looking tired. The crowd cheers in a subdued manner, since they don’t know what the heck is wrong.

 

Kotzenjunge: Hello everyone!

 

Max Zorin: You’re probably wondering why we’re dressed up like this. The reason is that we’ve been in court.

 

The crowd starts to murmur and worry about what might have happened.

 

Kotzenjunge: You see, Gigi D’Agostino’s agent was arguing against us showing our footage of our trip to Italy because he wasn’t being paid for it, nor did he agree to it.

 

Zorin: But it’s all taken care of now, and we’ve agreed to pay his hospital bills.

 

Kotzenjunge: So, with no further adieu, The Knights Conquer Italy!

 

They both gesture towards the Angletron, and the video begins. The camera is showing Kotzenjunge walking towards an executive looking building. The camera keeps up with him as Kotzenjunge talks to the cameraman.

 

Kotzenjunge: All right Max, you know the plan, right?

 

Zorin: Go in, beat Gigi’s agent, knock him unconscious, then shit down his throat?

 

Kotzenjunge: Correct! And we’re getting it all on tape! Oh, I almost forgot! Hello viewers, we’re in Florence, Italy! After that bastard Gigi skipped out on his performance at Living Angleously with out money, we decided to hunt his ass down even if it meant coming here to Italy on the OAOAST’s budget!

 

Zorin clears his throat.

 

Kotzenjunge: Er, I mean, we paid for this. Totally clean and all good. No funneling of money here, nosiree.

 

Zorin: Okay, composure, we’re about to go in.

 

They enter and approach the receptionist’s desk.

 

Kotzenjunge: Howdy, I’m looking for the office of Gigi D’Agostino’s agent.

 

The receptionist speaks Italian.

 

Zorin: Hold on Kotz, let me find my Italian-English dictionary...

 

Kotzenjunge: Don’t worry, I got this covered. Keep the cameras rolling.

 

Kotzenjunge produces a picture of the agent and shows it to the receptionist.

 

Kotzenjunge: Tell us where this dude is.

 

The receptionist points them in a direction and tells them what number door is his office.

 

Zorin: Grazi~!... dumb bitch...

 

Kotzenjunge: Now now, she was helpful. Ah, here it is.

 

Kotzenjunge kicks the door open and produces a crowbar. He slams it on the agent’s desk and the agent visibly wets himself.

 

Kotzenjunge: All right motherfucker, we paid your boy $20,000 to perform at a show and he didn’t do SHIT! We want our money or you’re going through this goddamn desk, or worse for you and more fun for us, this crowbar goes through your head! Now are you going to cooperate, or what?

 

The agent speaks Italian.

 

Kotzenjunge: Don’t try that shit with us! I know you speak English! I ought to...

 

Kotzenjunge rears back with the crowbar... and the video cuts off.

 

Zorin: What the hell?

 

The crowd boos. Los Infernales appear onscreen in the video’s place.

 

SpiderPoet: You fools! This is what you do in lieu of preparing for a match that you laid a challenge out for?

 

El Dandy: ...

 

SP: You should be pushing yourselves to the limit! You can’t handle the power of the TRINITY!

 

El Dandy: ...

 

Spider Poet: And furthermore...

 

Zorin cuts him off.

 

Zorin: Dude, why doesn’t he ever talk?

 

SP: What?

 

Zorin: Your boy there, your “life partner.” The brother never talks!

 

SP: Dandy doesn’t need words. His actions speak for themselves.

 

Kotzenjunge: Then why does he have such a flashy name? Why not El Silencio?

 

SP: I... don’t know.

 

El Dandy: ...

 

Kotzenjunge: Hey, Dandy!

 

El Dandy’s expression changes from stoic indifference to stoic attentiveness.

 

Kotzenjunge: I’ve got in my hand right now a crisp new $100 bill for you if you speak!

 

El Dandy: ...

 

SP(barely audible): Come on man! Say something!

 

El Dandy: ...

 

Zorin: It’s clear what Dandy’s function is on the team. He’s the ventriloquist dummy!

 

Kotzenjunge: Well, it would explain why we never see both of SpiderPoet’s hands while they’re doing interviews. Didn’t know those two were that freaky, you know?

 

SP: WE ARE NOT FREAKY!

 

El Dandy: ...

 

SP: You will understand how foolhardy it is for you two to make fun of us when we face you at School’s Out. You will feel pain as only The Trinity can provide. You will sorely regret...

 

Zorin: Blah blah blah. Honestly, is all of the IntenseZone talent this melodramatic?

 

Kotzenjunge pulls out a remote control and points it at the Angletron.

 

Kotzenjunge: What’s on the other channel?

 

SP: What the... no, you’ll regret this....!

 

Kotzenjunge turns the Angletron off with the remote.

 

Kotzenjunge: Oops, accidentally hit the power button. Oh well.

 

Zorin: Thanks for your time everyone! At School’s Out, we’ll show our gratitude by bringing the Tag Titles home to HeldDOWN~!

 

The crowd cheers and the Knights exit.

 

The broadcast returns to Cole and Coach....

 

Cole: Uh oh, someone is going to get fired for that!

 

Coach: Well it’s not my fault...

 

Cole: What you have just seen was not cleared for airing by the OAOAST.

 

Coach: I guess the Boogie Knights, just wanted to have some fun!

 

Fade...

 

----------------------------------------------

OAOAST School’s Out Promo.

----------------------------------------------

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

Cole: Welcome back...

 

"Dream On" blares through the speakers and the fans rise in unison to heavily boo the former two-time OAOAST champion.

 

Coach: Here comes the ever miserable Anglesault.

 

Anglesault strolls through the curtains with a smirk on his face and his patriotically colored robe rippling behind him as he saunters to the ring with pyro going off behind him.

 

Cole: Here he comes Coach! The two-time World Champion is on his way to the ring to face his former aWo lackey Some Guy in a preview of what's to come at School's Out.

 

Coach: Yeah BABEE~! We're getting a PPV caliber match right here on HeldDOWN! for free!

 

Anglesault enters the ring as the boos intensify and he stands in the corner waiting for his opponent.

 

Coach: We've been waiting for this since SG made his return and it's about to happen!

 

"Sexy Boy" bursts out through the speakers and the crowd jumps to their feet and cheer wildly as Some Guy DANCES~! his way into the arena.

 

Cole: SG has this crowd electrified!

 

SG tosses off his Red Sox cap and slides into the ring he spins around and hits his pose as the red, white, and blue pyro shoots off behind him.

 

SG and AS stand in opposite corners and stare each other down.

 

AS removes his robe and the combatants move to the middle of the ring and get face-to-face. They jaw at each other and then begin to circle the ring. They go for a lock up but AS bluffs out of the way. They go to lock up again and AS bluffs one more time. SG is getting agitated.

 

SG: Come on you fucking pussy! Fight me BITCH!

 

::Crowd pops::

 

Coach: WHOA BABEE! Those are some strong words.

 

AS stalls a little and they go to lock up but AS side steps SG again and grabs the referee and hits a Salt Shaker on him. The crowd is stunned and so is Some Guy.

 

Cole: What the hell was that!?! What is he thinking? You can't attack a OAOAST official like that.

 

AS motions for SG to come fight him now and seems overly confident with out a referee.

 

SG runs at AS and slides through his legs hooking them on the way through taking AS down onto his face. SG pops up and grabs 'Sault's legs and begins to hoist him up for a Wheelbarrow Someplex. Just as SG has him cinched up Brock Ausstin jumps in the ring and nails SG with a steel chair. Brock picks up the fallen Some Guy and hits him with a F-Stunner-5 that knocks SG out completely. Brock positions SG in the middle of the ring as Anglesault climbs the turnbuckles. AS leaps off and hits SG squarely across the ribs with a SaltSault. Brock grabs the ref's hand and makes the count for him.

 

One

 

Two

 

Three.

 

Cole: This is a disgrace! Oh my God they're stomping on Some Guy while he's unconscious. Un-Stable has no mercy and they have no conscience. They're going to put SG in the hospital if this keeps up.

 

OAOAST officials finally come run down to the ring and get AS and Brock away from SG but not before they left him battered, bloody, and beaten.

 

Cole: Oh my god, SG has been left a bloody mess! There is going to be hell to pay for Anglesault!

 

Caoch: Thank you and good night!

 

Credits...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest caboose

HeldDOWN~! © 2003 OAOAST Productions

 

Executive Producer

Anglesault

 

Associate Producers

Zack Malibu

Caboose (I don't deserve this credit, cos I fucked up)

 

Writers

Zack Malibu

CanadianChick

IDrinkRatsMilk

Some Guy

The Amazing Rando

Shattered Dreams

Kotzenjunge

VanSiclen31

Kingpk

Anglesault

LaParkaYourCar

Caboose

RevEvil

Jimmy Beard

HollywoodSpikeJenkins

 

Anyone I've missed, I apologise, this show has been a headache to put together.

Edited by Zack Malibu

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sign in to follow this  

×