[DVDVR ROAD REPORT] NWA-VA 5/10/2003!

[Guest DEAN RASMUSSEN]

[DVDVR ROAD REPORT- NWA-VA 5/10/2003] PRESTON motherfucking QUINN and PHIL BROWN HAVE A VERY SCARY MOMENT! CHINO MARTINEZ AND ROBERT ROYAL END OUR TWO YEAR NATIONAL NIGHTMARE! THE OLD SCHOOL EMPIRE RULE THE FUCKING WORLD! THE UNTOUCHABLES ARE OVER WITH THE KIDS! CHRIS ESCOBAR DIES FOR YOU!

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Greetings Gentle Reader,

 

I get there early because my friend Jessie is quitting the Richmond Police Force in two weeks to stay home with his youngun and will THUS also have time to pursue his real dream- editing video 25 hours a day. He and my friend Steve are trying to start a little production company and I told them that taping the professional wrestling would be a good way to break in the equipment and logistics- so I am dubbed the IWL (Indie Wrestling Liasson) and I show them who to talk to and annoy. They show up at 5:00 and get me to hold the door as they tape the prematch PROMOS~! so noone walks in on them. I do my part for the advancement of the biz. After Steve and Jessie have placed a camera on a basketball backboard and are ready to roll with their two handhelds, I assume my place among the crowd just as young mulDOOMSTONE rolls up, lookin as only he can look.

 

Grail vs. "Playboy" Pete Jennings: I think Grail is from Kylie and Dragan's school if he is the same guy I saw at the GWA show they ran. Playboy Pete is fun and has a nice finisher (Chokeslam Powerbomb better than Wifebeater's. Yes. Yes it was.) Playboy Pete needs to cover up his Fish Symbol Of Jebus tattoo is he truly wants to pull off the sinful Playboy gimmick. This is perfectly fine indie opening bout of wrestling- with the occassional blown armdrag, but decent little build up to the finish as Grail's offense is deceptively complex for such a youngster and much of it was executed beyond a youngster in the indies level. Playboy was more Old School and reeled the whole match in to make the finish super hot for the 12,000 children in the building. My favorite part was the Youth Of Richmond busting relentlessly on Grail's pseudo-Spiderman pants.

 

Dragan Frost vs. Brandon Day vs. Chris Escobar: This match fucking RULED for a three-way (which I hate so very deeply as a concept in wrestling). They did the cool thing of having Frost (who is perfectly fine) and Brandon Day (who may be the third best wrestler in the state of Virginia behind Preston Quinn and Phil Brown) team up the whole time and beat the shit out of the marvelous Chris Escobar. Escobar just fucking DIES for your pleasure and sells the beating so perfectly as a babyface that one would compare him to a budding Ricky Steamboat if Escobar wasn't as equally great selling as a heel. Escobar does a Shooting Star to the floor and lands directly on his head. Day sympathetically drags him into the ring and fucking DESTROYS him with a powerbomb. They go with the story of Escobar selling the beating and getting the crowd behind his hope spots until Day misses a Pescada and crushes Frost who turns on Day and allows Escobar to get the flash pin. The match was progressing to a deeper Bill Watts finish where Escobar would get pinned and he would get over with the crowd for putting up such a fight but they undercut it with the turn by Frost which was kind of the cheap way out. Great match though. Escobar has a future in this biz if he has a future. Brandon Day is fucking balls out.

 

Ryan Spade vs. Mike Thomas: Me n mulDOOMSTONE were STOKED that Mike Thomas showed up with the little Fields Of Erin bowler cap but were completely distraught that they never let Thomas get on the stick. DAMN YOU TO MOTHERFUCKING HELL, NWA VIRGINIA! WE HAVE SO LITTLE IN OUR LIVES AS IT IS! WHY DO YOU DENY US THIS?!?! Thomas talking about his street fighting days in Belfast while never varying from his Fluvanna County Virginia accent is complete WRESTLING GOLD and we feel cheated. And he needs to do the Riverdance thing again, that was fucking great last time. Spade comes out with the the fucking AWWWWEEESSSSOME Neal Sharkey who insults ladies at ringside and enrages children by looking like an evil music teacher and we weep at the innate beauty of the cheap heat Sharkey can garner by simply showing up. Sharkey would COMPLETELY pull off the Radio Shack manager look if would simply invest in a Member's Only jacket. If THAT wouldn't get his legit heat with the rednecks, nothing would. How much could it cost? Sharkey is your GOD. The match itself was basically Mike Thomas beating the life out of silver pants bedecked Ryan Spade until Sharkey can cheat enough to get his boy the pin. It's style over substance but I have enough substance in my life to justify getting way too much into this.

 

Chino Martinez vs. Robert Royal: While I was backstage (yes, I am so inside, motherfucker) before the match started, Chino hadn't showed up yet- I think he and Magic were caught in traffic- and I was so stoked that there wouldn't be a final 7th match and we could keep dragging this best of 7 series into the third year of its existence. It is a part of us now- the way we in Virginia live, the way we are. But Chino showed up and we have closure- but I am the Virginia Indie Wrestling Fan equivalent of an Iraqi after the fall of Saddam- the reign of terror is over and we are glad we are free, but where do we go from here? The match itself was the best of the 7 matches I've watched them have- which means that Royal had his back to me as he was throwing punches for the most part. Royal worked Chino's leg and did a completely baffling submission that I couldn't quite figure out which gets bonus points in my book. Sharkey was your Cheap Heat Jesus again and accidentally hits Royal in the head with his shoe and allows Martinez to CRUSH young Robert Royal with a fucking NASTY looking Air Raid Crash and... oh my God... it's really over. The best of 7 is finally over. I am at a loss. After two years and a thousand false finishes, cancelled matches, rebookings, acts of God, it's finally over. WE FEW, we happy few.... and gentlemen in Dinwiddie and Scottsville and wherever the hell JT lives WILL SELL THEIR MANHOOD SHORT knowing they were not with us on St Chrispins day when the NWA Jr Heavyweight title was FINALLY SETTLED! Chino gets the (swanky) belt and all we can pray for is that the commission will hold the belt up and call for a complete Junior League tournament. It is truly the end of an era....

 

Mike Lynn vs. Magic: Mike Lynn cut off all of his hair and we were distraught- as he now looks like Roofer With A Courtdate. He still wrestles like a motherfucker though as Magic kills him dead after Lynn works over Magic's leg for the body of the match. Lynn continues to deny his fans his beautiful Old School Elbow Drop. Magic crushes him like bug with a superdangerous Lyger Bomb.

 

Mike Booth/ Damian Wayne vs. Sean Lei/ Dirty Money: Man, fuck the bullshit, Booth and Wayne are a fucking GREAT Southern heel tagteam as the Arn and Tully to Quinn's Flair in the Old School Empire stable. Wayne is fucking NAILS when it comes to the hard style that is in the tradition of Murdock and DiBiase. The selling, the straight forward credible offense- fuck yeah, that's what I want from my Southern heel tag team. Lei and Dirty Money are really great in this as the goofiest Rock n Roll Express ever assembled in a community center- as they play to the kids with their highflying and wacky antics. Cameo accompanies them and stands in front of us at ringside and me n MDS try as hard as we possibly can not to stare directly at her BUTT. The adorable children in front of us kept calling Cameo over and she would come over and they would ask her questions about what bastards the Old School Empire were and what have you. It was adorable. Dirty Money throws Lei over the toprope onto a huddled evil stable and the fun begins. They go for the full Southern tag with the faces beating down Wayne and Wayne playing it perfect by being foiled every time by the faces until he can finally cheat enough to get the advantage. Booth is completely fabulous with his dicklike saves, kicking Lei and Money in the head to break the count. Booth is 100 times smoother in the ring now than the first time I saw him a few months ago and he can feign arrogant prickishness like a king. The Old School Empire finally use enough evil to get the HEAT~! on Lei and Money but somehow Money got his nose busted open hardway and on the Sacred Soil of Virginia that means you take it home as soon as possible so they clusterfuck it quickly into a double countout. Cameo ends up in the ring with Devon Sturgis- the manager of the OSE, and Cameo hits him down yonder and is basking in her NWA VA Women's title glory when she is punked out by Kylie McLain, setting up a match I wouldn't mind seeing- since I assume there is LEGIT HEAT IN THE BACK betwixt the two. This was on the way to being really fucking great until bad luck/booking cut it short.

 

Preston Quinn vs. Phil Brown: This is scary. Four minutes in, a double neckbreaker goes awry and Quinn is covered in blood from a gash over his eyebrow and Phil Brown is writhing in pain and ambulances were on the way. I wasn't even going to write this up until I got news from Rick O'Brien yesterday that both were fine after stitches and a night in the emergency room. At the time it was scary. PQ's kids and my kids have played together in my backyard. Phil Brown's kids were there. I'm glad it wasn't as serious as it looked when it happened because it looked fucking scary. I await a rematch.

 

Overall, it was an odd night. I dug all the matches for various reasons up to the main- though the three way and the tag were the one's i would say were actually good, with the three way edging out the tag. The main event freaked me and every one there out.

 

DEAN.