WWE Confidential December 21, 2002

January 17, 2003

WWE Confidential December 21, 2002

Late yet again you ask, well, seeing how Confidential FOLLOWS Velocity, I always like to wait for CJ to put his recap before I post mine… Honestly, I had this written on Monday, but practically forgot about it due to the holidays. Here’s some good news for everyone, yet another website (www.oldschool-wrestling.com) will now be receiving my week late Confidential reviews, that bring the current count up to five sites. GO ME!!! Now before I got a plethora of e-mails asking whether or not I applied for the 411 spot, the answer is I didn't. Reason being, they wanted the review up in 30 MINUTES! I don't think I need to elaborate on that any further. Speaking of me, I am actually going to make a New Year's Resolution for 2003. That is right, I'm going to attempt to make a commitment. Once 2003 rolls around I will try my hardest to get the Confidential report up within 48 HOURS!! It will be tough, but punctuality is something I always needed to work on. I also plan on writing at least one tape review a month during school. Once school is out I'll probably be back to one a week. Lastly, for the first time since the beginning of Confidential and Velocity, this episode of Confidential actually scored a higher rating than Velocity (0.9 > 0.8). Could this be a Confidential Renaissance?

Cover Story

This week Confidential decided to take a look back at the beginning of the WWF's stupidest booking EVER...why of course it must be the WCW buyout. Shane Helms discusses the rumors of a WWF buyout, while Lance Storm remembered hearing about Eric Bischoff buying the company. Some recycled footage from the Bischoff bio segment follow. Many wrestlers were sad that WCW would be closing, but Booker T thought of it as opening up another chapter in his career. Flair also considered the last Nitro to be a good night. He was ready to be rid of WCW and was happy about wrestling Sting one last time. Kidman remembers seeing the WCW agents being overseen by WWF personal, so everyone knew who was really calling the shots. Booker was planning on joining the WWF down the road anyhow, so this sort of made that transition a little easier. Steiner lies through his teeth when he says that he was glad WCW closed this way he could sign with the WWF again. Bull fucking shit. The guy sat on his ass for two years and only came to the WWE now because he was one of the last options left on Vince's quick fix list. Booker had to take a big paycut to join the WWF as quickly as he did. Otherwise he would have had to wait a year for his Turner contract to expire. Helms figured that at the very least he would have a short career in the WWF due to him being the WCW Crusierweight Champion. Lance Storm compares the backstage feelings to those of a funeral. Flair was unsure as to whether he would continue to be involved in wrestling, but was glad nonetheless to see the end of WCW. More recycled Bischoff footage. Flair goes on to call that night one of the happiest nights of his life.

Raw Retro- Vince introduces Eric Bischoff as the Raw GM.

Segment 1: 1/1

Victoria has new entrance music performed by T.A.T.U, which loosely translates to "This Girl Loves That Girl" in Russian. So the deranged psycho diva is played down to the ring by a group of Russian lesbians. The name of the song is All the Things She Said. Most of the music video seems to be these two Russian chicks making out in schoolgirl outfits while it is raining. They may or may not be in a cage, I can't tell. Victoria meets the girls in NYC and talks about the importance of good entrance music. Victoria seems like a really down to earth person.

Segment 2: 1.5/2

As a continuation from last week, we get to see more of the Rock on the set of his untitled movie. He shows us all the bulls.... and their shit. The Rock introduces us to the makeup guys and Rosario Dawson. OMG!!! We just saw the Rock's trailer!!!!11 And he says goodbye. Do I care? Please...

Segment 3: 1.5/3

The WWE Superstars talk about Christmas. Just for the hell out it, I'll play along.

Favorite Gifts

Al Snow: Head

Chris Nowinski: Basketball hoop

Crash: Socks and underwear

Bill DeMott: Stocking

Lita: Acoustic guitar

Retro Rob: One of those Universal Exercise machines (like the Bowflex)

Clip of Stone Cold caroling follows. I miss Steve.

Gift You Always Wanted, But Never Got

Jamie Noble: Motorcycle

Sgt. Slaughter & Pat Patterson: A match with the Rock.

Booker T: Car

Chris Nowinski: Dog

Retro Rob: I'll have to borrow Nowinski's answer.

Clip of the infamous DX (Shawn & HHH) Christmas gift to all the fans.

Do You Like to Give or Receive

Give: D-Lo Brown, John Cena.

Receive: Al Snow.

Retro Rob: I actually prefer giving, but receiving isn't horrible or anything. I just like buying things for people and then seeing the surprised look on their face when they open it. It just makes me feel good. As for receiving, I usually know what I'm getting and when I don't there is a very good chance that I won't like the gift and then must pretend to be happy.

Greatest clip ever...Stone Cold stuns Santa! Did I already mention how much I miss Steve?

Greatest Part of Christmas

D-Lo Brown: Snow

Billy Kidman: Decorations (Ugh, I hate Christmas lights)

Ivory: Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

John Cena: Being with family

Bill DeMott: Picking up all of those empty boxes and wrapping paper after the presents are all opened. Did anyone tell Bill that you don't need to kayfabe on Confidential?

Retro Rob: Honestly, I don't like Christmas because it requires having to visit my extended family. Christmas Eve is the shit though because my extended family comes to me. Therefore, I guess my favorite part of the holiday season would have to be just seeing people in a jovial mood and having a good time.

Segment 4: 2/4

Now it's time for a behind the scenes segment on the Royal Rumble commercial. This year’s concept is the minutemen vs. the Red Coats. Whoever did the casting for this probably shouldn't have signed an Asian guy to be a Red Coat. Anyhow the guys are about to have a shoot out, but then charge the ring and brawl. Kurt Angle watches from far away and mutters "They call THAT a Royal Rumble?” Now that line may have been funny had we not seen Kurt say it half a dozen times. Kurt complains about having such a small speaking part, so the director allows him to chokeout two Red Coats.

Segment 5: 2/4

Test and Stacy dropped the puck at a Richmond Renegades hockey game. During halftime Test and Stacy had a little one-on-one. Test couldn't score on Stacy once, yet claims that he grew up around hockey. Stacy on the other hand never laced up a pair of hockey skates. They make a good couple IMO.

Test may have his testicles, but Gene has his "Geniuses". This actually causes a stagehand to break on in laughter. THAT IS A CONFIDENTIAL FIRST BABY!!

Segment 6: 3/6

I imagine next week will be a rerun (YAY!). Pretty bad show this week. Hopefully the WWE will think up of some good segments over the two-week break.

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