TV 14
L, V

PRESENTED IN HD

* DUN DUN DUN DUNNA, DUN DUN DUNNA *

Across a river, over a bunch of mountains, through fields, sweeping past trees and bushes, hovering over the skyline of New York City, the OAOAST logo flies through the air...before sweeping down, brushing past an elderly man who seems understandably shocked to see six over-sized letters fly past him. The logo continues going, nearing a house...which luckily, a woman is leaving, meaning the logo can sweep through the open door, continuing on down the hallfway and into the living room where a young kid is sat on his computer. It sweeps past him, hitting the computer...which explodes with a flash, lighting up much to the kid's shock and delight.



THE OAOAST...WHAT THE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD IS READING~!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YnhmOvXxUYU

Anglesault, Triple H, *beltshot*, TrebleCharged
Fingerpoke, BigMcLargeHuge, a W o

AngleMania, No-Sell Match, Albert, Bradshaw, Spear Gets Banned
Sole Survivor, Goodhelmet, Cobain Was Murdered

Angle-Plex, Caboose, In Crowd, The Superstar
Alfdogg, Zack Malibu, and Mario Logan

Poppa Popick, JINGUS, Zero Hour War Games
Infernales, Miracle Weirdness, O A O A S T!

CHORUS
We didn't start the e-fed
It was just a *beltshot*
Can't explain all this lot
We didn't start the e-fed
It turned into something
So we kept it going


HeldDOWN, IntenseZone, Mad Cappa and PRL
Spin The Wheel, Make The Deal, Totally Endorsed

Crystal, Eskimo, Dream Machines, Ragdoll
Calvin Szechstein, Beating Other 29

Axel, T-Bod, First Ever Female World Champ
Damaramu, GPX, Derek Stone, wait no he's Drek

Black T, Sly Sommers, New New Midnights, The Parka
Donald Trump, Jivin' J.R, everybody does SPINEBUSTAAAHH~!

We didn't start the e-fed
It was just a *beltshot*
Can't explain all this lot
We didn't start the e-fed
It turned into something
So we kept it going


Leon Rodez, Hoff and Stevens, Chris Bryte, Chicks Over Dicks
HI-YAH, Spezia, Survive Or Surrender

Blurricane, Brock Ausstin, Original Elite Champs,
War Ghymes, Run For The Gold, Emporer Of The Deathmatch

Anderson Cup, Cornette, Axel Crystal, Start To Date
Peter Knight, Some Guy, Leon Was A Porn Star!?

Battlebowl, Lightning Crew, Bohemoth and Christian Wright
Heartland Title, 24/7, remember the Women's Division?

We didn't start the e-fed
It was just a *beltshot*
Can't explain all this lot
We didn't start the e-fed
It turned into something
So we kept it going


Sk8ter Boiz, S.H.I, First Cibernertico,
Sooners, Love Docs, PRL Champ For A Year

Stephen Joseph Wins The Title, The Upstarts Lasted For A While
Usual Suspects, 6-Man Belts, Deadly Alliance

D*LUX, Jade's A Slave, Tag World Cup Gets Underway
Wildcards In To Help Zack, Then They Stab Him In The Back

We didn't start the e-fed
It was just a *beltshot*
Can't explain all this lot
We didn't start the e-fed
It turned into something
So we kept it going

Landon Maddix, Todd Cortez, People Start To Pull Their Guns
Drek Wins, Disappears, Blank Is Gone, Zack New Champ

Reject TK, Diablos, Enterprise Buys Jade's Soul
Titles Merging Into One, Sandman9000 Reign Of Terror

Team Heyross, Gunslingers, Moneymaker, Logan Marries
Cuban Wall, Mister Dick, Bosley, Josie, Catch A Predator

Cucaracha Internacional, Invitiational Chamber Of Hell
Everyone Else Is A Nerdly, Krista's Champion Finally!

We didn't start the e-fed
It was just a *beltshot*
Can't explain all this lot
We didn't start the e-fed
But when we are gone
It will still burn on, and on, and on, and on...

We didn't start the e-fed
It was just a *beltshot*
Can't explain all this lot
We didn't start the e-fed
It turned into something
So we kept it going

We didn't start the e-fed
It was just a *beltshot*
Can't explain all this lot
We didn't start the e-fed
It turned into something
So we kept it going

We didn't start the e-fed
It was just a *beltshot*
Can't explain all this lot
We didn't start the e-fed...

ANGLESLAM

BOOM!
BOOM!
BOOM!
BOOM!
BOOM~!

LIVE!
San Juan, Puerto Rico

We pan around the crowd, then over to the longtime voices of the OAOAST at Sofa Central.

COLE
GOOD EVENING LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! And Welcome to OAOAST ANGLESLAM!!

COACH
Cole, I am more than excited for tonight, sir. Do you know why?

COLE
Why is that, Coach?

COACH
Because tonight, we will see the current OAOAST World Champion Krista Isadora Duncan take on the high-flying, technical wizard known as Leon Rodez. It's going to be magnificent!

COLE
Not only that, but we ALSO have the OAOAST World Tag Team Championships being defended, as reigning champs Team Heyross take on the LDC Moneygang!

The arena suddenly goes

CUE:
"Walk All Over You" by AC/DC

-The arena's spotlights flash on, illuminating just the ramp and ring. As the song reaches the end of the opening, the curtain flies open, revealing


(You wouldn't know who she is, so why say it?)

The fans begin cheering, simply because the gal is hot. The mystery woman stops at the top of the ramp as the curtain once again flies open. The man standing in the entrance way wears a red flannel button up shirt and skinny blue jeans. His eyes are hidden behind his pair of dark aviator sunglasses. The man runs his hands through his short-ish red hair before walking down the ramp, arm in arm with the beautiful brunette in short shorts.

COLE
It looks like we're starting off this show with some new faces, isn't that right, Coach?

COACH
uh-huh...

COLE
HEY! Stop ogling the new girl!

COACH
uh-huh...what....yeah...

-The two new faces slide into the ring, as the lights are still extreme and fixated right on them. The unnamed woman stands in the square of the ring, smiling out at the Puerto Rican fans. A random stage crew member rushes into the ring and hands her a microphone.


UNNAMED
"Let me just start off by saying, what a horrible horrible experience our little Puerto Rican trip has been..."

-Of course the fans boo.

UNNAMED
"It has nothing to do with you people, although...heh...some of you are quite rude...."

-The boos are a little bit more scarce.

UNNAMED
"It's because we signed with this company a month and a half ago, and THIS...THIS is our first show. So where the F[CENSORED] are we?"

-The camera zooms in on a single sign, reading "GREETINGS FROM TOMBSTONE, AZ." We now see the mystery woman again.

UNNAMED
"In case the brass in the back forgot who we were, since so many seem to get lost in the shuffle here...my name is Veronica Curtis...I signed a six figure contract to manage the man to my right...The True Savior of the OAOAST...


Billy...THE KID...CASSIDY!!"

-A few scattered fans cheer as the sunglassed man kissies at Veronica. She kissies back before continuing to meander around the ring.

VERONICA
"This beautiful man ALSO signed a six figure contract, only his states clearly that he is here to wrestle. So that means you have a fully-trained, rip rarin' to go Professional Wrestler just itchin'...just WAITING to get into the ring, but no. What do the brass at the OAOAST do? They decide that Leon Rodez deserves to take up time...they decide that Zack Malibu is - somehow - still relevant enough to squeeze in. So where does that leave us? Where does that leave Billy Cassidy and Veronica Curtis? Twiddling their thumbs in the back, waiting for that glass ceiling to lower just enough for us to squeeze ourselves in."

-The fans slightly cheer, but most stay silent.

VERONICA
"If I can liken the OAOAST to something, it would be a sinking ship...and it has NO-ONE to blame...but themselves."

-The boos are deafening now as Veronica smirks slightly, surveying the damage.

VERONICA
"Now, normally, I would be laughing at you idiots in the back for staying aboard...I would be laughing at you stupid stupid fans for allowing your beloved OAOAST to become the breeding ground for complacency and backstage politics. BUT NO LONGER!! The old days of the OAOAST are officially OVER! As of right F[CENSORED]G NOW, WE are captaining this ship. WE are running things the way they USED to be run. WE...are going to be responsible...for bringing the OAOAST back to what it once was, standing high atop the pro wrestling mountain!"

-The boos now turn to cheers as some fans begin chanting "BRING US BACK! BRING US BACK! BRING US BACK!" Veronica smiles wide as she slowly twirls around, taking in the cheers.

VERONICA
"...but that's not happening tonight..."

-Boos again.

VERONICA
"You're the idiots that paid to see THIS product, so why should you be rewarded for your complacency? Nonono, this Friday...the new era begins. For now, enjoy the shit."

-With that, the spotlights cut off, and the arena is filled with darkness and jeers. A few moments pass before the lights hit once again, revealing the now empty ring

COLE
(sarcastically)
Some great attitude she has.

“Money Talks” by AC/DC cues and the crowd boos.



BUFFER
The opening contest of Angle slam ‘09, tag team action set for one fall. Currently making their way to the ring, accompanied by LORELEI DECENZO and representing THE ENTERPRISE! First, hailing from Washington, D.C., and weighing approximately '8 and 1/3 BARS OF GOLD'… CHRISTIAN WRRRRRRRRIGHT!! His tag team partner, 237 pounds, from Vero Beach, Florida, and a former heavyweight champion of the world… “THE BILLION DOLLAR HEIR” THEODORE MMMOOOONNEYMAKER!!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Moneymaker and Wright piss off the locals with their antics, laughing at their clothes, waving $100 bills, etc.

COLE
The Enterprise obviously in a good mood tonight, but wasn’t the case two weeks ago when OAOVW graduate Eskimo Kid finally defeated Christian Wright on OAOAST Syndicated.

COACH
Thanks to the Orange County Cobras, I might add.

COLE
Let’s take you back.

Courtesy: OAOAST Syndicated
August 22, 2009
Check Local Listings



COACH
How can the Eskimo Kid even accept a win like that? I know I wouldn’t.

COLE
I seriously doubt that. And let's not forget the Orange County Cobras are out for revenge tonight after Theodore Moneymaker basically put a hit on Ned Blanchard with the help of the Last Kings of Scotland.

“Scream” by Chris Cornell hits and the crowd ERUPTS.

BUFFER
And their opponents, accompanied by MOLLY NERDLY… from Orange County, California, total combine weight 460 pounds, the 2009 Anderson Cup champions… SIMON SINGLETON and NED BLANCHARD... THE ORANGE COUNTY COOOOBRAS!!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

The O.C. Cobras and Molly do the baby face thing down the aisle. They’re all business once inside.

* DINGDINGDING *

Ned and CW start off with a war of words. CW still fuming over what happened to him two weeks ago on OAOAST Syndicated.

* WHAP *

“OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!”

SLAPPED across the face, Ned rubs his left cheek, and then unloads on CW!

COLE
Did that backfire on Christian Wright or what?

COACH
The guy was sucker punched, Cole.

Irish whip, and Ned drills CW with a back elbow. Moneymaker then gets caught coming in with a clothesline. That brings Simon inside and the O.C. Cobras fire their former Enterprise (or E for short) associates in for a BAAAAAACK body drop!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

Ned wrings the arm of CW and tags Simon, who delivers a middle rope double axe handle smash onto the outstretched limb. Back to the arm-wringer, except CW retaliates with a hard European uppercut! Face-first into the boot of Theodore Moneymaker goes Simon and the E tag.

* CHOP *

“WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!”

* CHOP *

“WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!”

* CHOP *

“WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!”

Simon returns fire with a series of overhand chops that stun Moneymaker. Knee to the gut stops Simon in his tracks, but he slides through Moneymaker’s legs on the rebound and executes a hip toss, and then a standing dropkick! Moneymaker pops to his feet and charges into a body slam. The O.C. Cobras tag and deliver their patent DOUBLE FEATURE FLAPJACK!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

Moneymaker rakes the eyes, clubs Ned across the shoulders, then sends him for the ride. Simon tags in as Ned springs off the ropes, ducks a clothesline from Moneymaker and lifts him for a back suplex, crashing down only after Simon makes contact with a SPRINGBOARD CLOTHESLINE!

COLE
What teamwork by the Orange County Cobras!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

Moneymaker reverses a whip and delivers a back elbow, then drops A FISTFUL OF DOLLARS!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

Moneymaker whips Simon into the buckle and tags CW. The Natural eager to get his hands on either of the O.C. Cobras following the events of two weeks ago. After punishing Simon with European uppercuts in the corner, CW delivers a belly-to-belly suplex, then a middle rope elbow drop!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

CW places Simon in a SLEEPER HOLD!

COLE
Simon’s in big trouble here.

COACH
Unpleasant dreams!

Molly rallies the crowd while Lorelei unsuccessfully tries to pipe them down. The rush of adrenaline kicks in and Simon makes his move, striking CW in the gut with back elbows. Now freed Simon charges off the ropes…but into the arms of CW and THE WRIGHT OFF!!

The count.

ONE!

TWO!

NO! SAVE BY NED!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

Again CW and Ned trade barbs, only this time it allows Moneymaker to pummel Simon in the corner!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

By the time the ref turns around Moneymaker is back on the apron. The E tag and Moneymaker executes a POWERSLAM!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

CW tags back in, drapes Simon across his shoulders and rolls forward.

COACH
The Bank Roll!

COLE
Could this be it?

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

NO, KICKOUT!

The E look at each other as if asking what’s it gonna take to put Simon away. CW then points to his noggin and hooks Simon for a suplex.

COLE
Stockmarket Crash?

Up goes Simon, but he slips out and takes CW down with an INVERTED DDT!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

COACH
That’s CW’s move, Cole.

COLE
And Simon just borrowed it.

Rather than go for the cover Simon looks to tag out instead. As he nears the corner, Moneymaker rushes in to knock Ned off the apron, and then drops an elbow on Simon.

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Moneymaker tags in and slams Simon. From the middle rope he dives back and hits nothing but canvas!

COLE
Nobody home on the diving back elbow.

Simon goes for the tag but gets stopped by CW, until an ENZUIGIRI clears the path for the tag!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

MONEYMAKER


Ned blocks Moneymaker’s punch and unloads with a series of his own. Irish whip is followed by a BAAAAAACK body drop! Moneymaker begs off in the corner but Ned stays on the offensive. He backs Moneymaker into the corner and hammers him from the middle rope.

ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
FOUR!
FIVE!
SIX!
SEVEN!
EIGHT!
NINE!
TEN!

Again Moneymaker is whipped, this time into CW. While CW falls outside Ned plants Moneymaker mid-ring with THE SLINGSHOT SUPLEX! Ned then launches Simon off the top and down onto Moneymaker!

COLE
The Atomic Blond!

Ned covers.

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!!!

* DINGDINGDINGDING *

“Scream” by Chris Cornell cues.

BUFFER
Here are your winners, the team of SIMON SINGLETON and NED BLANCHARD... THE ORANGE COUNTY COOOOBRAS!!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

Sent retreating, the E watch the O.C. Cobras and Molly celebrate on the AngleTron.

COLE
The Orange County Cobras get their payback on Theodore Moneymaker. What a start to Angleslam!

COACH
For you maybe.

Master Blaster (Jammin') hits, and Denzel makes his way through the curtains.

COLE
Our first title match of the evening! Will Denzel be the man who brings down Sandman?

BUFFER
[i]The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the OAOAST Heartland championship! Making his way to the ring, hailing from Montego Bay, Jamaica, weighing in at 227 pounds...DENNNNNNNNNNZZZZZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL SSSSSSSSSSSSPENCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RR!!!!!

Denzel enters the ring, and makes his pyro shoot from the buckles, then awaits in the corner, as the lights dim, then begin going crazy, as if a virus has infected them, randomly jerking around the arena, frantically changing colors and turning off and on. It’s as if a bad anime scene has come to life.

Loud scratching fills the airwave, as if a DJ has lost their mind and is attempting to break their equipment. In-between the rips, legitimate music kicks on, of a Southern, heavy metal nature.

I ask you please just give us/
Five Minutes Alone.”

The lights continue to dart and flash as the music leaves and the scratching continues, only to come back again, now of a hip-hop nature.

White America/
I could be one of your kids.”

The rap fades out and the scratching continues, at an even greater pace, until music comes back, now of a hardcore variety.

Final Prayer/
Final prayer for the human race.”

The music leaves once again and the scratches reach their apex, before the sound cuts out and the arena goes pitch black. A single spotlight appears on the stage, the only light in the darkened arena. People look towards the light, but see nothing. Then People = Shit by Slipknot hits.

HERE WE GO AGAIN MOTHERFUCKER!

The crowd goes insane as a figure punches through the curtains, wearing torn black jeans, a sleeveless black t-shirt, and two bandanas, one over his face and the other over his head. His hands are taped up, with a red "X" on the back of each of them.

BUFFER
His opponent...from South of Heaven, weighing in at 220 pounds...he is the OAOAST Heartland champion...representing the Deadly Alliance...SSSSSSSSSSSSANDMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
NNNNNNN NNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
E THHHHHHHHHHHOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND!!!!!

COLE
This match made after Sandman played a big hand in Denzel's loss of the OAOAST United States championship, and after the continued interference of each man in the other's matches around the loop!

Sandman gets to ringside, and is met with a BASEBALL SLIDE from Denzel!

COACH
What a cheap shot!

Denzel waits for Sandman to get to his feet, then hits him with a PLANCHA~!

COLE
Denzel Spencer not wasting any time here, didn't even wait for the bell!

Denzel slugs away on Sandman, then tosses him into the ring, and rolls in after him.

*DING DING DING*

COLE
And now the match is *officially* underway!

Denzel stomps away on Sandman, then sets him up for an Irish whip. Sandman reverses, then attempts a clothesline, but Denzel ducks, and hits him with a flying forearm, sending Sandman flying through the ropes and back to the outside! Denzel follows, and sets up a suplex, but Sandman blocks, and suplexes him crotch-first onto the guardrail!

COACH


COLE
Sandman turning the tables with that move!

Sandman takes a couple steps back, then clotheslines him, and Denzel falls into the crowd!

COACH
They're taking it into the stands, Cole!

Sandman and Denzel slug it out in the front row, with Sandman getting the better of the exchange, then ramming Denzel into the guardrail! Sandman then drags Denzel further into the crowd, then stops and delivers a scoop slam on the floor!

COLE
Denzel slammed on the unprotected concrete in the crowd!

Sandman then grabs a fan's drink, threatening to slap him if he resisted, and tosses it on Denzel, then finds a trash can, and slams it onto the back of Denzel! Sandman then picks up Denzel and sets up a piledriver.

COLE
Oh no, not a piledriver on the concrete!

However, Denzel blocks, and backdrops Sandman onto the concrete!

COLE
But no, it's Sandman tasting the UNFORGIVING CONCRETE!

Denzel hammers away on Sandman as they head back towards the ring, then tosses him back over the guardrail. Denzel backs off some fans, then hits Sandman with a slingshot legdrop over the guardrail!

COLE
Nice legdrop there by Denzel!

Denzel then sets up an Irish whip, but Sandman reverses, sending Denzel into the steel steps!

COLE
Sandman back on the offense once again!

Sandman climbs onto the apron, then waits for Denzel to get up, and floors him with a flying clothesline from the apron! Denzel rolls into the front of the aisle, as Sandman disassembles the steel steps.

COACH
Sandman's looking to use those steps, it looks like!

Sandman picks up the steps and brings them Denzel's direction, but Denzel catches him with a drop toe hold, causing his face to go into the steps!

COACH
Oh no!

COLE
What a counter!

Denzel grabs Sandman and tosses him back inside, then rolls in and backs into the ropes, catching him with a SCISSOR KICK~! Cover...

1...




2...




Kickout!

Denzel climbs to the top rope, and catches Sandman with a MISSILE DROPKICK~! Cover...

1...




2...




Kickout!

COLE
Denzel really starting to pour it on now!

Sandman pulls himself up at the ropes, and Denzel charges him, but Sandman backdrops him to the floor!

COLE
Wow, Denzel taking a big fall right there!

Sandman rolls outside and picks up Denzel, and whips him into the ringpost! He then rolls inside, and waits on Denzel to get back in. Denzel gets to the apron, and pulls Sandman's legs out from under him, dragging him to the ringpost!

COLE
Denzel looking to work over Sandman on the ringpost!

Denzel rams the knee of Sandman into the ringpost!

COACH
No!

Denzel then reels back and does it a second time! Sandman scoots out of the corner, and Denzel grabs a steel chair from ringside!

COLE
Denzel with a chair now! I've never seen this aggression from Denzel Spencer before!

Denzel lets Sandman get to his feet, then WALLOPS him with the chair!

COLE
Chair right to the SKULL!

Denzel raises the chair in the air, drawing the cheers of the crowd. He then places the chair around the leg of Sandman.

COACH
Oh no, not this!

Denzel starts to climb to the top, but Sandman recovers in time to grab the chair for himself, and DRILLS Denzel on the back as he makes his climb!

COACH
Yeah!

Denzel falls off the top back into the ring, and when he gets to all fours, Sandman delivers another devastating shot with the chair!

COLE
Two big shots from Sandman!

Sandman picks up Denzel, and executes a snap suplex! Cover...

1...




2...




Kickout!

Sandman rolls outside, and grabs a KENDO STICK from underneath the ring. He then rolls inside, and delivers a shot to the back of Denzel! Sandman raises the cane in the air, drawing a mixed reaction from the crowd. He puts the cane around the throat of Denzel, choking him as he brings him back to his feet. He positions the chair, and delivers a cane-assisted Russian legsweep onto it! Cover...

1...






2...






Kickout!

Sandman backs Denzel into a corner, and stomps away on him. He then executes BOOT SCRAPES~!, and rolls to the outside. He goes under the ring, and comes out with a LADDER~!

COLE
Uh-oh...

Sandman pushes the ladder into the ring, then ducks back down underneath the apron. However, just as he pops his head back up, with a barbed-wire bat in tow, Denzel baseball-slides the ladder into it!

COACH
Oh no!

COLE
Ladder to the face of Sandman!

Sandman falls back to the floor holding his face, which is now bleeding.

COLE
And Sandman has been busted open!

Denzel rolls to the outside and picks up Sandman, then rams his face into the steel steps! Denzel then rolls Sandman back inside, and slugs away at him on the mat. He then picks up Sandman and whips him into a corner, hitting him with a HANDSPRING ELBOW~!, then executing a HURRICANRANA~! and hooking the legs...

1...











2...











NO! Sandman kicks out!

COLE
Wow, how close was that to crowning a new champion?

Denzel picks up Sandman, and executes a GUTWRENCH POWERBOMB~! Cover...

1...









2...









Kickout!

Denzel then grabs the ladder and sets it up in a corner. He picks up Sandman, and executes a gutwrench belly-to-belly, then begins to climb.

COLE
Denzel making the climb!

COACH
Get up, Sandman!

Denzel gets his balance atop the ladder, then jumps...but Sandman raises the barbed-wire bat, and Denzel jumps right into it!

COACH
Yes! There you go!

COLE
Denzel making contact with that barbed-wire bat, and now he's bleeding!

Sandman rolls over and covers...

1...









2...











NO!!! Denzel gets a shoulder up!

COLE
But Denzel still with fight left!

Sandman pulls himself to his feet, and folds the ladder back up, then lays it down on the mat. He then picks up Denzel, hooks him...and delivers the ARCHANGEL'S WINGS ONTO THE LADDER~!!!!!11111

COLE
Sandman right onto the ladder with the Archangel's Wings!

Cover...

1...











2...











3!!!

*DING DING DING*

COACH
YES~!

BUFFER
The winner of the match...and STILL OAOAST Heartland champion...SSSSSSSSSSSSANDMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
NNNNNNN NNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
E THHHHHHHHHHHOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND!!!!!

COLE
Sandman retains the Heartland title once again! But lots of credit to Denzel Spencer, he gave Sandman a fight we haven't seen over the course of his record-long reign!

Sandman grabs the belt from the referee, and raises it high in the air, then departs the ring.

COACH
Just another casualty in Sandman's reign of terror, Cole!

COLE
Well, I don't think we've seen the last of Denzel Spencer, there'll be other chances for him after this performance!

COACH
I have to admit, though, I expected a stronger showing out of Sandman! Maybe this is a sign that nearly two years of defending that belt in these matches is catching up to him!

COLE
Could well be the case, and who knows, maybe if he meets Denzel again, we could see the crowning of a new champion!

The only true senior official in wrestling, 80-something CLEM BUZZLEFOXER roams the ring as Michael Buffer awaits his cue.

BUFFER
The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is for the ONE & ONLY WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP!



“The World is Mine” by David Guetta cues and Lorelei DeCenzo leads her men ringside flanked by green and gold spotlights.

BUFFER
Introducing first, the challengers, accompanied by their manager LORELEI DECENZO… representing THE ENTERPRISE, at a total combine weight of 430 pounds… COLIN MAGUIRE, JR. and SPENCER REIGER… THE LDC MMMOOOONNEYGANG!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Their hoodies ripped off simultaneously by Lorelei, Reiger and CMJ mug for the cameras.

COLE
We know Reiger and CMJ have big wallets and mouths. But can they put their money where their mouth is, especially after they all but guaranteed victory on HeldDOWN~!?

COACH
Anybody who saw AngleMania knows the answer to that, Cole. No other team has ever pushed Team Heyross the way Spence and CMJ did that April night. If anybody’s gonna dethrone Team Heyross, it’s gonna them.

“Shine” by Collective Soul hits and red, white and blue pyro shoots off behind Team Heyross.

BUFFER
Their opponents and the REIGNING and DEFENDING tag team champions of the WOOOOOORLD… total combined weight 485 pounds… CHARLIE MOSS and QUENTIN BENJAMIN... TEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMM HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

Team Heyross march down the aisle but get AMBUSHED inside removing their windbreakers!

* DINGDINGDING *

Reiger dumps Benjamin outside and the LDCMG slam Moss. Benjamin gets decked trying to re-enter and, following a DOUBLE STUN GUN on Moss, Reiger delivers a MOONSAULT!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

SAVE BY BENJAMIN!

Forced to go at it alone for the time being, Benjamin puts up a heck of a fight. He whips both Enterprise members into the corner and monkey flips Reiger, then hip tosses CMJ onto him!

COLE
Quentin Benjamin is a one man gang!

Moss rejoins the action, super kicking CMJ to the floor. Reiger is then whipped in for a double hip toss, but Team Heyross hang on and perform a double back suplex instead!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

Benjamin tags in and unloads on Reiger. Irish whip, followed by a BAAAAAACK body drop! SPINNING WHEEL KICK catches Reiger square between the eyes and Benjamin covers.

ONE!

TWO!

NO, BENJAMIN MOVES AND CMJ ELBOWS REIGER!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

COLE
That’s not what they had in mind there.

COACH
You think?!

Benjamin dropkicks CMJ outside, where he’s soon joined by Reiger as the challengers look to regroup with Lorelei DeCenzo.

COLE
A rough start for Lorelei and her men.

COACH
It’s a marathon, not a sprint, Cole. We’ve got like 55 minutes remaining in the time limit. 55!

CMJ takes over for his team and locks up with Benjamin, then clubs him with an Irish uppercut! Though rattled Benjamin manages to reverse a whip and performs a RELEASE OVERHEAD SUPLEX! Reiger then gets caught trying to sneak in with a standing dropkick!

Moss receives the tag and catches CMJ with a quick SCHOOL BOY!

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

Moss grabs a side headlock only to be shoved off into the ropes, but he blocks a hip toss and counters with a NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX!

ONE!

TWO!

NO!

CMJ kicks out and charges into an inverted atomic drop! Reiger meets the same fate and Moss delivers a DOUBLE COCONUT!

Lorelei can only shake her head in frustration as CMJ is whipped into the ropes. But he leapfrogs Moss and surprises him with a CROSS-FACE CHICKEN-WING GERMAN SUPLEX!!

COACH
Fenwayplex!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

SAVE BY BENJAMIN!

CMJ tosses Moss outside to Reiger and suckers in Benjamin. While the two exchange words, Reiger rams Moss into the guardrail, and then holds him up for Lorelei who SLAPS the taste out of his mouth!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

COLE
That’s uncalled for, damn it!

COACH


Reiger receives the tag and helps Moss back in, then crashes down with a SLINGSHOT DOUBLE STOMP!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

Reiger rams Moss into the buckle and CHOKES him with the draw string of his shorts.

ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
FOUR!
FI--

Reiger breaks at the very last second. Moss reverses a whip but Reiger still takes him down with a FLOATOVER INVERTED BULLDOG!

COACH
New York Knockout!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

NO, SAVE BY BENJAMIN!

COACH
What is that, like the third time Benjamin’s saved Moss? Then I think there needs to be some kind of limit on that. We should have new champions right now in my opinion.

COLE
Fortunately you’re opinion doesn’t matter.

The LDCMG tag and CMJ executes a drop toehold while Reiger delivers a measured knee drop!

CMJ covers.

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

Irish uppercut sends the sweat flying off Moss, who then is sent flying through the air courtesy of a T-BONE SUPLEX!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

NO, SAVE BY BENJAMIN!

COACH
This is ridiculous, Cole. Benjamin’s like a politician clinging to power.

COLE
At this point, the LDC Moneygang may have to kill Team Heyross in order to become tag team champions. There’s no quit in them.

Reiger gets the tag and delivers a RUNNING KNEE TO THE FACE OF MOSS IN THE CORNER!

COLE
Blood is the New Black! And the LDC Moneygang may be the new champions in a matter of moments.

Reiger signals the end is near, but Moss blocks multiple Reiger Counters and SLINGSHOTS the NY hotshot into the top buckle!

LORELEI


That buys Moss the time he needs to make the tag!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

The LDCMG charge Benjamin and get leveled by a SPRINGBOARD CROSSBODY!

ONE!

TWO!

DOUBLE KICKOUT!

CMJ gets drilled by a SUPERKICK, and Reiger a POWERSLAM!

The count.

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

Reiger reverses a whip to the corner and charges in, but Benjamin gets the boot up and delivers a TOP ROPE BULLDOG!

The cover.

ONE!

TWO!

SAVE BY CMJ!

COACH
What action we’re seeing, Cole!

COLE
And it’s still anybody’s game!

CMJ clubs Benjamin across the back and goes for THE D-STREET CUTTER, but Benjamin shoves him off and throws a SUPERKICK…which CMJ BLOCKS and SPINS Benjamin, who delivers a DRAGON LEG WHIP!!

COLE
To the floor goes CMJ.

And onto the shoulders of Moss goes Reiger as Benjamin climbs to the top.

COACH
Oh no!

COLE
Are we gonna see the Super Rocker Dropper?

Not if Lorelei DeCenzo can help it. She grabs Benjamin’s ankle and holds on for dear life as he gently tries to shake her off. When that fails Benjamin pushes her back with his hand, then gets CROTCHED on the top rope by CMJ!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

CMJ shoves Reiger forward but Moss sits down to block the victory roll!

The count.

COACH
Clem, you idiot! Moss isn’t the legal man!

ONE!

TWO!

NO!

Somehow Reiger reverses the hold, steps through to hook the legs and bridges back!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!!!

* DINGDINGDINGDING *

CLEM


COACH
We’ve got new champions, Cole!

COLE
How can we? Even you admitted Moss wasn’t the legal man.

COACH
Yeah, but I’m not the referee. And the referee’s decision is final!

Lorelei hands the tag belts to her men and they all celebrate until Clem snatches them away.

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

COACH
What’s that idiot doing now?

More officials arrive to help Clem sort out the situation. Ring announcer Michael Buffer is then informed of the decision.

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, your attention please. I have just been informed by referee Clem Buzzlefoxer that BOTH men’s shoulders were DOWN! By rule, the title shall be returned to the reigning champion or champions and this match declared a DRAW!

LORELE


SPENCER/CMJ


BUFFER
STILL your ONE & ONLY WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS… CHARLIE MOSS and QUENTIN BENJAMIN… TEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMM HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

The LDCMG go after Clem but are cut off by Team Heyross, who clothesline them outside!

COACH
This is highway robbery, Cole.

COLE
It nearly was for your boys. The titles would’ve been theirs had Spencer’s shoulders not been down. Obviously in his advanced age Clem didn’t realize Moss was the illegal man.

COACH
How so? That senile old fool didn’t even acknowledge Moss wasn’t the legal man.

Clem made an honest error and immediately corrected it.

COACH
At the expense of the LDC Moneygang.

COLE
Had it been the other way around -- with the LDC Moneygang as champions and Team Heyross the challengers -- you or your Enterprise buddies wouldn’t be complaining about the official decision.

COACH
…

COLE
Yeah, I thought so.

COLE
The action continues here at Angleslam. Let's go back up to Michael Buffer.



Veteran ring announcer, Michael Buffer stands in the middle of a darkened ring, highlighted by a purple spotlight.

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, it is time the OAOAST Women’s Title bout!

M

O

N

E

Y

So sexy

Damn, I love the jam, the jet and the mansion. (Oh yeah)
And I enjoy the gifts and the trips to the islands.(Oh yeah)
Its good to live expensive
You know it, but my knees get weak intensive
When you give me k-kisses

Thats money honey,
Well I'm your lover and your mistress
Thats money honey
When you touch me, its so delicious
Thats money honey
Baby when you tell me the pieces
Thats money honey

COLE
Lorelei’s earning the big bucks tonight, this is her 3rd appearance on the show!

Lady Gaga's Money Honey rings out over the numerous boos from the arena crowd. Stepping onto the Angleslam set is Lorelei DeCenzo, wearing black booty shorts and a referee’s outfit. She twirls around to show off her impressive body before pointing to the ring. Nodding to herself she heads down the entrance ramp with nose firmly stuck in the air to avoid interaction with the audience.

BUFFER
Introducing the special guest referee, she comes from Manhattan Beach, California, representing The Enterprise she is a former women's champion….THE MONEY HONEY LORELEI DECENZOOOOOO!

"BOOOOOOOOO!" the fans spit venom at Lorelei, who returns an admonishing glare to them.

COLE
Lorelei DeCenzo has many personal reasons for meddling in this match, one of which is that she thinks Morgan Nerdly has abandoned her for Leon Rodez. I’ll admit that a relationship with Leon isn’t very healthy for Morgan, but can it be any worse than being abused and manipulated by Lorelei?

Apparently overhearing this comment, Lorelei shouts down Michael Cole, which seems to please the audience members behind him.

COACH
Damn, breh, you stay getting sonnned like a bitch. Naw, you ain’t even a man, you got daughtered.

:CUE: Lorie-Je Vais Vite

Sophie comes onto the Angleslam stage waving and greeting the cheering audience as red and blue lights flash behind her. She wears a white tank top with her name etched on the back, black workout pants, and white tennis shoes that carry her down the entrance ramp.

BUFFER
Introducing the champion, she comes from Marseilles, France, she is SOPHIE GREEEEEYYYYYY!

COLE
Lorelei has a mandate to keep Sophie safe. If anything should happen to her, Josie has stated she will be dealt with severly.

COACH
That’s that bullshit, son. Injuries happen all the time. Ain’t no one got fired when Shayne Brave broke his arm, no one got the pink slip when Mister Moneymaker had to get forty five stitches to close up a wound at the Chi-Town Spectacular. This is nepotism and favoritism.

COLE
Can’t aruge that, I suppose.

Sophie slides into the ring, where she pops up and holds her women’s title high into the air for all to marvel over. She passes it to the referee, and then climbs to the top turnbuckle to hold a pose of victory with arms raised and head held high.

The dizzyingly frantic symbols and the ripping adrenaline of “This Is How I Disappear” flow into the arena like a volcanic eruption.

“OHHHHHHHHHH!” the fans murmur, knowing full well the danger that lies behind the entrance doors

COLE
Hereeeee she comes!

GO!

To un-explain the unforgivable,
Drain all the blood and give the kids a show.
By streetlight this dark night,
A séance down below.
There are things that I have done,
You never should ever know!

And without you is how I disappear,
And live my life alone forever now.
And without you is how I disappear,
And live my life alone forever now.

Bolts of electricity crash down like bombs onto the stage, exploding into blinding sparks. All across the arena, video screens are filled with the image of flickering electricity. The stage lies carpeted by a serene yet evil blue light. The most powerful burst of electricity scorches through the air and touches down in the middle of the stage. That’s when the youthful challenger first appears on stage, earning an intimidated reaction from the frightened crowd. Morgan wears a pinstriped booty shorted romper over her tiny frame. She chews on her blond hair nervously, and watches the crowd with the same frightened look they give her. There is however a noticeable section of the teenage crowd greeting Morgan with cheers. Angsty teenagers>>>>*

COLE
Is anyone as dangerous, as lethal as the Tiny Terror from Edmonton?

COACH
Nobody in the women’s division that’s for sure. I think peeps would rather fight Malaysia than Morgan. At least Malaysia is in control of herself and is conscious of what she’s doing. I don’t think Morgan can distinguish right from wrong.

BUFFER
From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada... she is a former OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION!! Prepare for SHOCK and awe from MMMOOOOOOORRRRRGGAAAAAAANN... NNEEEERRRRRDDLLLLLYYYYYYYY!!!

One foolish fan makes the unwise decision to shove a sign that reads “ALL RODEZ GO STRAIGHT TO KIDOLOGY” in Morgan’s face.

ZAAAAAAAAAP

COLE
Oh my! Oh my! She just….she just…oh my!

COACH
Awwwww shit, that nigga be cooked extra crispy! His ass gonna be served with some honey bbq sauce at Wendy’s. Bitch about to be Value Meal #5. It ain’t fast food its Wendy’s! HAHAHAHAAH! Look at my sign, guys, I’m on TV! Ahhhh I’m dying, guys! HAHAHAH!

Morgan has little concern for the latest victim of her ongoing rampage against humanity. Instead she trots up the steps, meeting Sophie’s fearful face with an empty expression.

Can you hear me cry out to you?
Words I thought I'd choke on figure out.
I'm really not so with you anymore.
I'm just a ghost,
So I can't hurt you anymore,
So I can't hurt you anymore.

And now, you wanna see how far down I can sink?
Let me go, fuck!
So, you can, well now so, you can
I'm so far away from you.
Well now so, you can.

Morgan gets into the ring and stands on the first rope, while leaning over the second. She casts a quizzical glance at the audience, almost childlike in its odd innocence.

COLE
If I was Lorelei I would’ve ended the match before it started. Zapping a fan is no way to begin an OAOAST title match. Hopefully that young man gets the medical attention he needs, and doesn’t sue us because I got mouthes to feed, shit!

DING DING DING

The challenger and the champion lockup in the center of the ring. However, the lockup is a short one, as it ends with Morgan trapping the women’s champion into a side headlock. Sophie is quick to make an attempt in fighting out the hold, by pushing the petite challenger into the ropes. Morgan manages to keep her hold for the moment, but when Sophie attempts to push her to the opposite ropes she’s sent running across the ring. Sophie rushes after her, hoping to get an early strike on the challenger. But Morgan’s bare legs slide across the ground like a soccer player, and Sophie is tripped by the daring slide tackle. Lorelei smirks at the tactic, but replaces that with and admonishing glare when Morgan looks at her.

COLE
A fine soccer player tactic, certainly appreciated by our European friends on the roster.

COACH
Sophie’s a euro and I bet she’s not appreciating it!

Morgan runs to the ropes, but as she comes back towards the center of the ring, Sophie rolls her body towards her in an effort to trip her up. Morgan’s platform pumps narrowly give her enough jump to elude Sophie. She carries herself to the opposite ropes. When she comes back, Sophie’s limber legs leap frog her and force her to take another run of the ropes. Her run is finally cut short, as Sophie rockets her lean frame into her with a spinning elbow strike. Sophie then makes her own run to the ropes, timing it so that she may arrive when Morgan is beginning to stand. Her tennis shoes throw her into the air, and she slices Morgan down with a fame assser! Morgan clutches her head and shrieks in anger. Her anger is only intensified when Sophie attempts a fall…

ONE!

Morgan gets her bare shoulder off the canvas. She nervously chews on her hair, afraid of some vague danger only she is aware of. Morgan rolls to her feet, with screams of “GET AWAY!” targeted at a cold and unfeeling Lorelei. Sophie gains her attention by tagging her with a pair of left jabs. These let Sophie take hold of Morgan’s arms and hurl her into the nearest ring posts. The French Girl follows that simple move with a painful one, driving her tanktop covered chest into Morgan’s face. Morgan stumbles out the corner, clearly dizzied by the impact of the strike. This works to Sophie’s advantage as she’s able to roll Morgan up with a school boy! Lorelei makes the count…

ONE!


TWO!

Morgan kicksout the pin!

COLE
Sophie may be one of the only performers in the history of this sport to make the school boy a viable finisher.

Sophie drags Morgan up by the collar of her romper. But Morgan breaks free of Sophie’s clutches by stepping onto her tennis shoes. Sophie hollers in pain and hops away from Morgan. Turning her back on the dangerous teenager is highly unwise; Morgan sweeps her legs out from under her. Sophie timbers to the canvas and her stomach is immediately struck by a running kick from Morgan. The unstable Nerdly girl then drops to her knees to place a choke hold on Sophie. Lorelei makes an attempt to uphold the rules and tries to separate Morgan from Sophie.

“STAY BACK!” Morgan hollers, almost as much to herself as to Lorelei. Her anger is scattered and furious as she leaps upright and stalks Lorelei across the ring all while clawing at her arms. Fortunately for Lorelei, Sophie sneaks behind Morgan and rolls her down with a school boy.. Lorelei makes a fast count

ONE!
TWO!

Morgan kicksout, and immediately rolls to her feet. Sophie pounces on her with rapid fire jabs that back the petite lovely into the corner. Several more jabs land against Morgan’s face, before Sophie whips her across the ring to the opposite turnbuckles. Morgan’s back smashes into the hard ringposts, but that’s the least of her worries with Sophie barreling down on her. Morgan makes a panic dive out the way at the last possible moment, and Sophie is left to crash violently into the posts. As Sophie is forced backwards Morgan is able to elevate herself onto the second turnbuckle. She then flies off, catching Sophie’s head and bringing her to the mat with a flying face crusher. Morgan takes another run off the ropes, timing her return to meet Sophie as she rises. Upon nearing the French champion, Morgan leaps into the air and grabs onto Sophie's chocolate colored hair for another face crusher.

COLE
With such a small body, Morgan is sometimes like a pinball, bouncing from place to place, she’s hard to keep track of sometimes.

Just as soon as Sophie hits the mats, Morgan is taking another run against the ropes. Coming back to Sophie's downed body, Morgan jumps high for an elbow strike. But Sophie moves out the way and Morgan's arm crashes into the rock hard canvas.

COLE
High risk low reward play for Morgan!

Annoyed by her folly, Morgan kips up and immediately starts throwing strikes at the champion. Sophie begins firing her own punches, but her flurry is cut short with a knee to the stomach from the challenger. Morgan takes a moment to catch her breath, and wraps her arms around Sophie's waist. She flips her through the air, before dropping her on her back with a devastating hold. Morgan maintains the hold on Sophie's body so that she may bring her opponent to her feet. With a giant heave and a surge of energy, Morgan is able to once again flip Sophie over to the canvas. Not content with just two deadly attacks, Morgan hauls her foe off the canvas and repeats the same lethal process. Morgan then makes another run of the ropes. She surges forward with full power, and plants a platform boot right into Sophie's back. The champion howls in pain, gritting her teeth to stomach the agony.

COLE
You look at Morgan's body and you think this girl couldn't be very strong, but the truth is Morgan has a lot of power in that body.

COACH
Super power! Melody says he has a primary mutation of electrical generation and a secondary mutation of super strength. That ain't fair, she gets a secondary mutation and my power is attracting your bitch ass every Thursday.

Sophie manages to stand up on her own accord, but that’s nothing more than a fleeting victory as Morgan traps her inside an abdominal stretch. Sophie hollers her pain as loud as her voice can manage, as Morgan tightens the hold with a vacant expression.

COLE
Sophie’s a thin girl, so there’s not a lot to be stretched, but Morgan is doing some damage.

The damage comes to a halt, when Sophie uses all of her strength to lift Morgan’s light body and hip toss it over to the canvas. Sophie then bounces off the ropes, and springs high into the air for a body splash. But Morgan tucks her knees into her chest and Sophie smashes against them.

“OOOOOOOOHHHHH!” the fans react as Morgan quickly leaps to her feet. She delivers several stomps to Sophie's head before pulling the French champion to her feet. Sophie combats Morgan's grip with punches aimed at her ribs. But Morgan fights past them in order to tuck her head between Sophie's arm. Several seconds later Sophie is thrown to the canvas with a release Northern Lights suplex! She tries to make a quick return to her feet, but this is halted by Morgan landing a basement dropkick against her head.

COLE
That had to hurt!

Morgan keeps her same empty expression as she attempts a cover….

ONE!

TWO!

Morgan lifts Sophie’s head off the canvas! Lorelei is momentarily stunned by this action, but recovers to warn Morgan about any tricks she may consider performing. Morgan ignores this warning as she pulls Sophie up to her feet by her tanktop. She situates the champion in between the second and third rope. That’s an action that creates a stirring of nervousness in Lorelei’s mind. The nervousness is well founded; Morgan begins choking Sophie against the ropes. The pain is written across Sophie’s agonized face, but there’s still an absence of emotion on Morgan’s.

COLE
Lorelei has to step in and do something.

COACH
Yeah or its her job, and Lorelei is too beautiful to fire, Mikey.

COLE
Who would give CMJ thousand dollar makeovers he neither wanted nor needed, without her?

Lorelei eventually has no other choice but to yank Morgan away from her rival. The audience expects fireworks of a violent sort. Yet they get none of that. Morgan simply stalks a circle around Lorelei, gazing at her with empty eyes. Even as she throws Sophie to the ground with a hair pull she still keeps her blue eyes locked upon Lorelei.

COLE
Those two were best friends, and tag team partners, and now Morgan acts like she doesn’t even know Lorelei, and Lorelei acts like Morgan stabbed her in the back!

COACH
Which she did. Can’t leave a sister for a man, unless that man is Da Coach and then that man is a god. Word to Theology.

Sophie tries to use the ropes that once tormented her as an aid to return towards her feet. But the Inspector rushes to her and slams her bare shoulders into Sophie’s head. As Sophie lies on the mat in agony, Morgan goes back to stalking around the ring, muttering inaudible words to herself. Continuing her strange self-talk, Morgan runs back to Sophie and rather harshly brings her upright. She then turns a stone face onto Lorelei while she tangles the champion into another abdominal stretch. Rather than rely on the simple submission hold to defeat Sophie, Morgan begins pumping elbows into her ribcage. A repeated succession crashes against her side, yet Sophie remains firm and unyielding. Her determination pays off, and she’s able to break free of the menacing hold.

COLE
Sophie broke the hold!

Despite having her submission ruined, Morgan stays on the offense with a flurry of punches that scrape across Sophie’s face. She then grabs onto Sophie’s wrist and throws her into the ropes. But the French champion returns to take to the skies and strike at Morgan with a diving lariat! But Morgan ducks it and Lorelei is the one struck by the errant attack!

“OOOHHHHHHHH!”

Not as fragile as your typical referee, Lorelei is back to her feet within seconds. She seethes with incredible rage over the strike, and makes movements to the edge of the ring to call for a DQ. This plan of action is of no pleasure to Morgan, who finally shows a hint of emotion. Unfortunately that emotion is rage and its directed at Lorelei. As soon as Lorelei reaches her destination she can feel the ground being taken from under her and her body levitate into the air. This is because Morgan is lifting her onto her shoulders in a standing fireman’s carry.

COLE
She wouldn’t!

She would and does, dropping Lorelei onto the canvas with a Shock and Awe (FU)! Sophie stands dumbstruck over Morgan’s actions, unsure how to proceed. Morgan has no such uncertainties as she grabs Sophie onto her shoulders and throws her down with another Shock And Awe. A pin is made, and soon a referee is running to the ring to make the count…

ONE!

TWO!

Morgan ends the pin doing such so that she may ATTACK the referee!

COLE
What is going on here?

Morgan grabs the referee and painstakingly hauls him onto her shoulders. Moments later he’s laid in the pile of bodies by the Shock and Awe! Another referee is already rushing down the entrance ramp, presumably to score the DQ. But as he enters the ring he’s pounced on by Morgan who moves with the tenacity of a jungle cat. She hammers him with punches and forearms, until he begins to stand up through her barrage of attacks. This merely leads Morgan to take him onto her shoulders and offer him the same shocking and awing fate as his fellow officials.

COACH
Oh shit, this chick bodying niggas twice her size!

Morgan leans over the ropes, expecting more referees. But as she turns around, she’s captured with an inverted diamond cutter (attacker leaps face down instead of face up) by Sophie! The French champion hooks Morgan’s legs, and sure enough another referee enters the ring.

ONE!

TWO!

Morgan kicksout! She quickly rushes back to her feet, but is thrown into the corner by an Irish whip from Sophie. Morgan lands hard against the ring posts, and Sophie comes charging in after her. But the cute Nerdly girl gets her platform heels up and tags Sophie in the face. As Sophie staggers away from the posts, Morgan follows her, rushing to try and hit a face crusher. But Sophie sidesteps her and pushes her towards the referee. Fear registers on the official as Morgan immediately takes him onto her shoulders. With all the might in her little body she slams him next to the other referees.

“YEAAAAAAAAA!” the OAOAST Marks shout, having found pleasure in Morgan’s rampage.

Sophie is back on her feet, and ducks a lariat from Morgan. The champion runs to the ropes and comes back to take Morgan off her feet with a running dropkick . Morgan gets right back up, but is put right back down with a snap suplex. Sophie then floats over into a cover.

“OOOOHHHHHH!” the fans murmur as another referee makes their appearance. But this is no ordinary official this is HeldDOWN~! GENERAL MANGER JOSIE BAKER! Immediately upon entering the ring, Josie makes a lightening fast count for her cousin…

ONETWOTHRE-NO MORGAN WITH THE KICKOUT! Josie can’t believe that Morgan found her way out the pin, and suddenly becomes highly alarmed. Her fright only increases when Morgan uses a double leg takedown to floor Sophie and begins twisting her into a liontamer!

COLE
Just like Leon Rodez!

Unable to fully rotate Sophie for the dangerous submission, Morgan must settle for falling backwards and slingshotting her rival into the nearest corner. But much to her chagrin, Sophie’s tennis shoes manage to land her on the corner posts. She then flies from the corner posts and nails Morgan between the eyes with an axe handle smash. A pinfall is made and Josie performs and even fatser count…

123-NO MORGAN AGAIN KICKSOUT!!! Josie is again distraught and beside herself. She can do nothing more than encourage Sophie to keep hacking away at her toughest challenger yet. Sophie springs to her feet and works the up the already enthused and excited crowd. With the fans buzzing at a fever pitch, she turns back towards Morgan….and winds up in a standing fireman’s carry!

COACH
Here we go!

The Shock and Awe is executed one more time, leaving Sophie battered and broken on the canvas. Showing zero emotion, Morgan drops down on Sophie and attempts a pinfall. Faced with an unfriendly referee, Morgan must endure an agonizingly slow count…

ONE!





TWO!


COACH
This is ridiculous!



THREE!

DING DING DING

COLE
She’s done it again!

Morgan rolls off of Sophie, and only now looks at the carnage she causes. Her eyes widened with something that’s both horror and regret over her pile of corpses. She rushes to her feet, chewing on her hair again to calm her nerves.

BUFFER
Your winner and new OAOAST WOMEN’S CHAMPION….MORGAN NERDLY!

COLE
Morgan Nerdly is now a two time women’s champion and believe it or not she ties a record.

The Thanksgiving Weekend Tradition...

NOVEMBER REIGN

Live, Sunday night, November 29.

Rogers Centre
Toronto, ON

TICKETS ON SALE THIS TUESDAY!!!

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall... and it is for the OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP!!!!!

"YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

"Oh (hey!), I've been travelin' on this road too long
Just tryin' to find my way back home
But the old me's dead and gone
Dead and gone
And oh (hey!), I've been travelin' on this road too long
Just tryin' to find my way back home
But the old me's dead and gone
Dead and gone, dead and gone..."

The opening to "Dead And Gone" by T.I. fades into "Numb" by Linkin Park, creating a dark mood over the arena. A dark and very bitter mood as the crowd boo wildly.

COLE
Here comes a man, desperate for revenge.

Emerging from the entrance way, the narrow eyes of Leon Rodez fix down on the stage beneath him. As Leon stares down, Morgan Nerdly follows out, still worn out from her match moments earlier but dutily accompanying Leon out. They slowly make their way down the aisle as the song meanders along. Coming to a stop in the middle of the aisle, Leon then looks up, Morgan falling to a knee beside him, as the song suddenly erupts and the lights flash back and forth from purple to white static (*coughrandyortoncough*).

"I'VE BECOME SO NUMB
I CAN'T FEEL YOU THERE
BECOME SO TIRED
SO MUCH MORE AWARE!
I'M BECOMING THIS
ALL I WANT TO DO
IS BE MORE LIKE ME
AND BE LESS LIKE YOU!"

BUFFER
On his way to the ring at this time is the challenger. From Grand Rapids, Michigan... he weighs in tonight at two hundred, eighteen and one quarter pounds. Being accompanied to the ring by the brand new OAOAST Women's Champion, MORGAN NERDLY... he is the Battlebowl Champion, looking to regain his World Title from the woman who snatched it so quickly from his grasp... ladies and gentlemen, this is the number one contender... "THE FALLEN IDOL"... LLLLLLEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOONN... RRRRROOOOOOODDEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

COLE
It was three months ago on May 31st that Leon Rodez experienced a rollercoaster of emotions in five short minutes, the highs of regaining his World Heavyweight Championship from Zack Malibu and then the lows of losing it to Krista Isadora Duncan when she cashed in her Money In The Bank contract. Still waters ran deep between Leon and Krista long before that night, complicated family ties and clashing personalities. But Leon's personality has changed so much this year. And tonight, it's not just about retribution. Leon has promised to leave Krista "a broken, emotionless ghost inside her own body", claiming he will make Krista know "what it feels like to die a little inside".

Leon enters the ring and comes to a stop three steps in, looking out into the booing crowd. Morgan stands protectively next to him, clinging onto his arm.

COLE
And what part is the new Women's Champion going to play tonight?

COACH
What makes you think she'd have any part to play, besides support? Why do you need to keep asking all these questions about this relationship?

COLE
Considering Morgan just competed five minutes ago, I doubt she'd be out here again so quickly, if there wasn't some kind of plan in place.

Turning away from the crowd, Leon's bitter stare is aimed at the entrance. The crowd buzz in the background and chants of "KRIS - TA!" begin to start up.


Give me those bright lights, long nights
High rise, over time

"YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

Give me them bright lights, long nights
Party till the sun is rising
High rise, over time
Working till the moon is shining
Hot guys, fly girls
Never thought I'd say
I feel on top of the world
I feel on top of the world Hey

A huge explosion of cheers ring out as dancers pile out onto the stage. But not the normal dancers you'd associate with Krista. Instead, a group of CHILD dancers to show the children are the future, or whatever the hell the PPV slogan ended up being. I dunno. Point is it's all cute and heart-warming and stuff. Krista eventually appears to another loud cheer, World Title belt around her well-toned waist. The kids dance around Krista and she lets out a heart-warmed "AWWW", while secretly longing for her usual eye-candy. One of the dancers, the smallest and therefore cutest of the lot, walks up besides Krista and they pose together. Before flipping the camera off together.

COACH
#I BELIEEEVE THAT CHILDREN ARE THE FUTURE!!#

COLE
Well, if anyone can cut the schmaltz, it's Krista.

BUFFER
And introducing the opponent! Hailing from Los Angeles, California! She is a Hollywood Walk of Famer, the 2009 Wrestler of the year, best selling author, and star of the world famous FIT with KID line of exercise videos. And tonight she aims to establish her dominance in what she claims is a Krista dominated industry! She is the MASTER of the Kidology and a two-time, reigning and defending OAOAST HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WWOOOORRRRRLLLLLDD... KKRRRRRIIIIIISSSTTTAAAAAA... ISADORA DDUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANN!!!!!!!

"YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

COLE
This match all fell into place last month, as Leon won the Battlebowl tournament and Krista regained the World Championship after overcoming great odds and misfortune to defeat Theodore Moneymaker in a First Blood encounter. And everything has alligned for Leon and Krista to settle their score, finally, here at AngleSlam. Krista made no bones about the way she won her first World Title, cashing in on Leon, after Leon manipulated his win over Zack, claiming Leon got what he deserved. But even though Krista has proven herself with title defences and a title recapture from Moneymaker, until she defeats Leon Rodez one on one, that question over how things went down at School's Out is still going to hang in the air.

COACH
God you talk alot.

Krista climbs to the apron and hangs herself off the ropes with an alluring pout, the ring vacated by Leon who walks around the ring trying to ignore the reaction of the crowd. Once inside, Krista quickly passes off the belt and encourages Leon to get into the ring, eager to get on with things. However her challenger is not quite so eager and just looks on, Morgan right by his side.

"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"


*DINGDINGDING*

As Krista marks her territory pacing around the ring, Leon stalls over getting inside. He talks things over with Morgan before climbing to the apron, slowly crawling in through the ropes, only to change his mind and duck right back out.

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

COLE
Leon not quite so eager to face off with Krista now that he doesn't have a weapon in his hand, or partners to hide behind.

COACH
He's just waiting for Krista to get back, that's all.

Leon paces on the outside as the Puerto Rican fans let him know what they think of him and his time-wasting. Not concerned in the slightest Leon continues to bide his time.

KRISTA
Oh honey, you're just like the kid who begs and begs to go on the big waterslide at the water park all day, then remembers he hates heights only once he's at the time. A pussy. So I guess I'm gonna have to do the same thing I did when I was a volunteer at the water park in my teens and give you a helpful kick in the ass to get you going.

Leaving the ring, Krista goes in pursuit of Leon who suddenly picks up a little speed. Albeit in the opposite direction. Rounding the corner Leon quickly grabs a hold of Morgan and HIDES behind the diminuative Nerdly girl. Krista stops in her tracks and can hardly belief the cheap tactic she's faced with. And as she stands with her hands on her hips, Leon shoves Morgan into her, before SLAPPING Krista across the head!!

"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

Leon quickly slides back in, waiting for Krista to predictably follow...



...but Krista slides right back out and Leon ends up hitting an elbowdrop on canvas!

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!"

COLE
Leon obviously with a plan there. The fatal flaw with that plan, clearly, it's obviousness.

From the apron, Krista springboards to the top and flies towards Leon. Despite being shaken from the elbow he's able to duck his head, forcing Krista to re-adjust and land on her feet. Krista carries on and hits the ropes. Leon drops down, forcing her up and over, coming off the ropes again and hooking Rodez down with a running hurricanrana! Finding himself in the corner as he gets up, a defensive boot is raised by Leon as Krista charges his way again. Krista manages to put on the brakes and catch onto the foot though. By the leg, Krista carries Leon hopping to the middle of the ring, before whipping on the leg and causing Leon to faceplant into the mat! That's enough for Rodez and he rolls out of the ring to safety.

COLE
Back outside goes Leon and I don't think there's a plan this time. He just wants to get the heck away from Krista.

Like many things recently though, Leon doesn't get what he wants. As he nurses his stinging face Krista sneaks up behind Leon and throws him into the guardrail!

COLE
Krista taking this fight to the floor.

COACH
This is personal Michael. I mean, everything's personal with Krista. Cause she makes it personal. But this has been personal for a while, so I guess it's more personal than it's usually personal.

Krista follows Leon around ringside and punishes him with a BACKRAKE. Which Leon clearly doesn't appreciate, turning around and smashing Krista in the face with a forearm. Krista shakes it off though, giving Leon another BACKRAKE... and then a CHESTRAKE as he turns around in pain!

KRISTA
Kitty got claws! GRRWWLL!

Trying to cover up, Leon is thrown headfirst against the ring apron before being rolled back inside. Krista makes sure to give everyone a good view as she climbs onto the apron and waits for Rodez to get back up. Leon is up quickly though and manages to stop Krista from taking to the air, nailing her with another forearm. Krista hovers dangerously over the thin ringside padding, gripping onto the top rope to save herself from a nasty fall. Another forearm rocks her, but she still manages to hang on. So Leon leans through the ropes and doubles her up with a shoulder. Leon then reaches through the ropes and starts to pull Krista through, with a front facelock applied.

COLE
Uh-oh... Leon's got Krista caught, with evil thoughts in mind!

Leon slowly brings Krista inside, leaving her legs dangling over the middle rope... but Krista realises she's in trouble and manages to turn to the side. She gets a foot on the rope and manages to push herself inside, safely onto her feet, then starts to fight the facelock with punches. Weakening Leon up, she manages to break the grip and promptly backdrops Leon, UP AND OVER THE TOP TO THE FLOOR!!

"YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!"

COACH
Krista dodged a bullet early, that could have been curtains.

COLE
But instead it's a bad fall and a worse landing for Leon Rodez.

Waiting for Leon to pick himself back up the wandering eye of the World Champion fixes on Morgan. But she hisses back. Not into hissing chicks apparantly, Krista turns her attentions to the match and runs across the ring, FLINGING HERSELF OVER THE TOP AND ONTO LEON WITH A SOMERSAULT PLANCHA!!!!

"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"

Popping right back to her feet, Krista finds herself right by the announce table. A perfect podium for her to garner maximum attention with a Coyote Ugly style dance upon.

COACH
I LOVE MY JOB SOMETIMES!!

Krista jumps back to the floor and tosses Rodez back inside. She then climbs the turnbuckles and takes flight again, with a flying crossbody block...


1...



2...



No!

Hopping back and forth Krista limbers up, starting to feel the confidence flowing. She attacks Leon in the chest with a kick. And a second. Before knocking him off his feet with a jump spinning back kick.

COLE
Our sources have found out that Krista's been taking nightclasses in jujitsu in recent weeks. Which by pro wrestling standards makes her a black belt already! Congratulations Krista!

As Leon picks himself back up Krista is already on the move. Coming off the ropes, she throws her body at Leon, who catches her in a wheelbarrow position. Krista pushes back off the mat, but that's where her complicated move ends, as Leon shoves her down, face-first to the canvas! Boos are Leon's reward for a great counter. Stepping over Krista, he comes off the ropes looking to follow up. But Krista was playing possum and connects with a high flipping dropkick to cut Rodez off!

COLE
Beautiful move from a beautiful lady!

COACH
Perv.

Cover...


1...



2...



No!

Krista scoops and slams Leon in the centre of the ring, stepping over to find her favourite spot, in front of the main camera. Ever the showgirl, Krista makes the crowd wait, building up their anticipation before she bends over. Yep, worth the wait. The booty starts a-bouncing and the crowd start a-cheering... until Leon reaches up and pre-empts the moonsault by rolling Krista up... but Krista rolls right through to her feet and dropkicks Leon in the face again!!

COLE
Krista, one step ahead!

Jumping back into position Krista makes her point more concisely, burning the tip of her fingers on her RED-HOT BUTT, before pulling off the Standing Moonsault!!


1...



2...



Kickout!

COLE
And just like many before him Leon Rodez is struggling to get to grips with the most unique OAOAST World Champion in history!

COACH
Many? Try everybody.

Leon tries to get back up, but is kicked in the back by Krista before he can do so. Wrapping him up Krista than makes the rare move of applying a submission move, a ground abdominal stretch. But don't fear, it's only to turn Leon into her own personal ventriloquist dummy.

KRISTA
(moving Leon's lip)
Wah, my Mommy doesn't love me. I'm so blue. Life sure does suck. And so on.

COLE
Oh my.

COACH
Is it any wonder the guy's so miserable with treatment like this!?

Furiously fighting his way out of the hold, Leon storms at Krista, right into a cradle...


1...



2...



No!

Leon aims a clothesline at Krista, who ducks. Taking a leap to the middle rope, she twists back, connecting with a dropkick. The force, plus the tide of the match, convinces Leon to keep rolling and go out to the floor again, which isn't a popular move. Krista rolls her eyes at having to play chase again and sighs as she leaves the ring. But once on the apron, her eye is caught by Morgan making a move.

COLE
Uh-oh, watch out. No telling what that young girl is capable of.

Krista's wise to worry about Morgan. But it turns out it's Leon she needed to be worried about. Reaching out, he grabs hold of Krista's ankle and pulls her off the apron...



*THUD!*

"OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

...CAUSING KRISTA TO SPLATTER OFF THE ARENA FLOOR!!!!

COLE
OHHH!!

COACH
That didn't sound good.

COLE
Krista landed flat on her back right on the concrete, no kidding it didn't sound good!

Rolling back inside Leon manages a look of relief, instead of his usual miserable expression. He crawls backwards across the ring, in conversation with the referee. Which allows Morgan to interject herself again and start putting the boots to the stricken World Champion!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

COLE
And now Morgan, the new Women's Champion, stomping away at the back of Krista! She's got no right being out here and this is exactly why! Krista is hurt and there's no need for this!

COACH
There's plenty of need. This is for all the people who've insulted Morgan in her life, all the people who've teased and taunted her!

COLE
This is Morgan trying to help Rodez become the World Champion!

Morgan backs away and although the referee doesn't catch her in the act, the fact that she's screaming at Krista as she does so is a pretty clear admission of guilt. Meanwhile Leon rolls outside, throwing Krista back into the ring.

COLE
That right there is why people are questioning this 'relationship' between Leon and Morgan. Just who is really benefitting?

COACH
Why must we deny Morgan a little happiness for once?

COLE
Because she's not happy? I mean, look at her. She's still got the same personal problems as before, just now she's devoting her trust into a different person.

Krista holds the back of her head as she's dragged off the mat. Leon shoves her back against the turnbuckles and drives with his shoulder, three times in succession to the ribs. Whipped across the ring, Krista is then hit with a Superman Spear in the opposite corner! Krista falls to her knees, holding her back. The only thing propping her up ends up being Leon's lower body, until he cruelly pie-faces her away from him and to the mat.

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Dropping to his knees Leon hovers over Krista and stares down, watching as she struggles to get back to her feet. A hurting Krista falls back to the mat and Leon drops onto his stomach, getting right up eye to eye with Krista.

"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"

The crowd sense Krista needs their help and try to get behind her as she lays in pain. Leon steps on the back of her head though, pinning her to the mat with her feet kicking in a desperate attempt to alert the referee she's in pain. The ref eventually steps in and moves Leon back, but he brushes him aside and slams a boot into the side of Krista's head!

COLE
The compassionless, emotionless number one contender, in control now. And not about to let up for a second.

Leon presses Krista down...


1...



2...



No!

Leon hovers again, waiting for Krista to fight to her feet. Which she does, in some style, reaching up and cracking him across the face with a slap! Rodez responds with a boot to the gut, then throws Krista out of the ring, onto the floor with another splat. And once again Leon keeps the referee occupied, allowing Morgan to run over and stomp away at the World Champion.

COLE
Now you can't tell me there's no plan being carried out here after this!

COACH
Maybe they're just a spontaneous couple?

Once the damage is done, Leon leaves the ring. Morgan walks away from Krista, looking yearningly to Leon for approval for her work. Leon is too focused on the match to give Morgan a second look though, throwing Krista back inside again. Lifting Krista up onto his shoulders, Leon brings her down across the knee with a gutbuster, shoving her off the knee and down for a pinfall...


1...



2...



No!

Krista tries to roll away, with Leon right on her tail. As she makes it to the bottom rope Leon pins her down and STANDS on her back!

"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE!"
"FOUR!"

Rodez steps off of Krista and onto the bottom rope. Once he's sure the count is broken, he then immediately steps back onto Krista with disdain for the referee.

"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE!"
"FOUR!"

Stepping back Leon is warned by the referee, a warning that falls on deaf ears.

COACH
Leon really making Krista suffer, just like he said he would.

COLE
Well this is about more than just the World Title to Leon. Of course that's his focus, the driving force behind him winning Battlebowl and getting this title shot at AngleSlam. But Leon sees everything that's gone wrong in his life in Krista. And he made it very clear, he didn't just want to beat Krista, he wanted to make her suffer too.

Grabbing hold of Krista by the wrist, more suffering is on Leon's mind as he flings her into the ropes. Krista though has other ideas. She hangs onto the ropes to stop herself, then flips Rodez off! Angered, Leon sprints at Krista looking to run right through her, only to get chopped down with a dropkick to the knee, hanging him over the middle rope. Rubbing at her back Krista looks down at Leon before breaking into a little SALSA ROUTINE!!

"YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
Krista feeling spicy, south of the border!

COACH
You been talking to Alix again?

Her salsaing takes her to the ropes and Krista comes back with all her body-weight landing on Leon's lower back!

COLE
Call That Bitch... well, don't call her bitch, that's for sure!

Distracted with the sea of fans in front of her, Krista remains sat on Leon's back for a moment, keeping him hung over the middle rope. An accident, she tries to convince the referee. Leon pulls himself up by the ropes and with Krista in conversation with the referee, runs in again. With her usual great awareness, Krista sidesteps, pulling Leon down with a backslide...


1...



2...



No!

Leon kicks out and rolls through to his feet, finding himself with a sudden free shot at Krista's head...



...but Krista blocks the kick! Hanging onto the foot she climbs back up, forcing her number one contender to hop around while she fiddles around in her clothing (steady now!) and produces her COMPACT MIRROR!

COLE
Uh-oh!

The referee warns Krista not to use the mirror, as she flicks it open and aims a beam of light into Leon's eyes. More annoying than damaging. But, annoying, definately.

KRISTA
Mirror, mirror, in my hand, who's the miserable pathetic douchebag I cannot stand? Leon, O Goddess, he art the douchiest of them all!

Suddenly, Leon snatches out for the mirror. Krista deftly tosses it aside, leaving her hand free to apply the BALLCLAW!!!!

"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

COACH
OOOOHHHHHHWIE!

Horrified, Morgan jumps to the ring apron and is stopped from entering by the quick thinking ref. Unfortunately for Leon, this allows Krista to twist and tug at his precious cargo with no sign of a count to save him. Forced to save himself Leon manages to get his leg free and aims a high knee at Krista. She ducks, leaving Leon straddled over her arm. The wicked World Champion smiles a devious smile and quickly applies a SECOND ballclaw, before arching back AND SUPLEXING LEON ONTO HIS NECK!!!!!

COLE
BLUEBALL PLEX!! A BLUEBALL PLEX!!

The referee turns around to find Krista pinning Leon...


1...



2...



Kickout!!

COACH
(painfully)
...she suplexed him by his gonads, Michael!

Now hobbled Leon gets to his feet. Krista lies in wait, striking Leon in the face! And again! And a third! She stops and prepares to admire herself in her compact mirror, except the compact mirror is gone. As Krista thinks about going to retrieve it Leon almost capitalises with a clothesline, only for Krista to duck, connecting with a roundhouse kick to the back of the neck.

COLE
What flexibility!

COACH
I know what I'll be dreaming about tonight.

With her challenger stunned, Krista runs off the ropes and leaps onto Leon's shoulders, snaring him in a headscissors. But Leon blocks! Letting Krista hang in front of him, Leon starts to pick her legs apart and tries to apply the Liontamer!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Krista is able to wriggle free, crawling between Leon's legs and out the other side to safety. Leon turns around quickly, but Krista is already up and coming off the ropes. A running forearm staggers the challenger. So Krista tries again, rocking him back a few steps. One final try is Krista's plan, but Leon catches her with a quick pick-up. Turning around, Leon carefully aims by the ropes and hangs Krista's throat across the top rope!!

"OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
Hotshot! And Krista looks to be in some discomfort after that.

Which is a real understatement, Krista clutching her throat and flailing her legs in a panic. Leon just sits back and watches, before waving Morgan over.

COLE
What is this now?

Morgan takes up a better position as Leon chokes at the injured throat!

"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE!"
"FOUR!"

Sitting Krista up, Leon takes her over to the ropes again, placing her over the middle rope mere inches away from the face of Morgan.

LEON
Come on Krista, insult her now! Huh? Where's your precious wit now Krista!?

Krista tries to, of course, but can only manage to cough and splutter painfully. Morgan looks on adoringly, almost shaking she's so happy, as Leon stands on Krista's back, hanging onto the top rope as he leans back choking her against the middle one. At four he steps down and releases the choke, leaving Krista gasping for breath.

COACH
Now that's what I call effective therapy!

COLE
That poor young girl is messed up. And she might not be the only one.

COACH
Can you imagine, Michael? Morgan as the Women's Champion, Leon as the World Champion? What a power couple they'd make!

Pulling Krista up off the ropes, Leon hooks her down with a short clothesline and covers...


1...



2...



No!

Krista dives and hooks on the bottom rope, hoping that'll gain her the reprieve she needs to gain her air back. No such luck as Leon kicks her free before stepping outside. Draping the World Champion across the apron, Leon backs up, then BLASTS Krista in the throat with his elbow!! Krista writhes in pain and the referee quickly checks on her.

COLE
A precise, sinister attack from the number one contender to the World Title. And the danger may now be if the referee is forced to stop the match, should Krista become unable to continue.

Wide-eyed, Morgan watches as Leon re-enters the ring. He covers Krista, forcing down on her windpipe...


1...



2...



No!

Sitting Krista up, Leon applies a sleeper.

COLE
Referee needs to watch this doesn't turn into a choke.

"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"

Krista struggles to respond, to the crowd or the referee, prompting him to check she's still conscious. Which she is, barely.

COLE
In this position, breathing must be so hard for Krista.

COACH
So's embarrassing people. Could you imagine, Krista with no vocal chords? OH! Beautiful!

COLE
She could still rip your eyes out. Or worse.

COACH
Yeah but at least the bitch'd be shut up while I'm watching NBA on my widescreen.

COLE
Since when do you live together!?

COACH
In my hypothetical mute Krista dream world we do.

Trying to escape the dream world she's found herself in, Krista fights through the pain and climbs to her feet. Reaching for the ropes she finds herself agonisingly out of reach. So, she's forced to drop down. The resulting jawbreaker breaks the sleeper, but damages Krista's neck and throat in the process.

COLE
A desperation move... maybe not the smartest, but Krista had to do something.

Leon quickly shakes the move off though. Pulling Krista up, he hooks her... and delivers a BRAINBUSTER!

COACH
He got it, new champion!

Leon hooks the leg...


1...




2...




NO!!

COLE
You should know better than to count Krista out by now, Coach.

Trying to drag Krista back up again, Leon feels that she's dead weight and lets her drop to the canvas. The Puerto Rican crowd boo as Rodez stands over their beloved World Champion, scowling down at her.

COACH
How about now?

COLE
Krista's not done yet. She's worked too long and too hard to become World Champion to let it end like this.

COACH
Too hard? She won it after Leon had wrestled for about 40 minutes!

COLE
She took advantage of her opportunity. And then overcame a curse on her to recapture from Theodore Moneymaker. She's not going to go down here at AngleSlam, so long as there's a breath left in her body.

As Krista struggles to get back up, Leon gives her a kick to the throat and leaves her writhing again! The referee reprimands Leon and he backs away, eyes still fixed on Krista.

COACH
Again, how about now?

Concerned for Krista's well-being, the referee drops to his knees beside her and asks if she wants to quit. Despite having her fair share of problems talking Krista manages to communicate that she doesn't. So Leon walks over, pulling her back up. Throwing Krista into the corner, Leon starts to take aim with right hands to the head. Krista is gradually knocked down into a seated position, allowing Leon to place a foot against the throat and choke her against the bottom turnbuckle.

"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE!"
"FOUR!"

Leon releases the choke and drops down, getting in Krista's face.

COLE
It's not often you get the chance to goad and taunt Krista in a match. And it's even less often you get away with it.

A smirk forms on Leon's usually stoic face seeing the state Krista is in, seemingly incapable of fighting back even from just inches away. Leon slowly backs away from the World Champion, lining her up in the corner. But as he charges in, Krista kicks her feet up and manages to catch Leon in the gut! Reaching up she then grabs the top rope and skins the cat, up onto the top turnbuckle!

COLE
Wow! How'd she do that!?

Leon quickly runs and tries to knock Krista off the turnbuckles, but runs into a fist in his face! Carefully Krista gets her footing on the top turnbuckle while Rodez is dazed. And once set, she tumbles off the top, knocking Leon down with a frontflip senton!!

"YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
And THAT'S why you don't count out the World Champion!

Both Leon and Krista lay hurt on the mat, Krista getting a well needed chance to regain her breath.

"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"

The referee counts both champion and challenger, reaching a count of six before Leon starts to get back up. Krista sits up too and they reach their feet at roughly the same time. It's Leon who strikes first, slugging Krista with a right hand. Krista comes right back with a shot though! Right hand from Leon! A shot from Krista! Almost losing his balance Rodez shakes off the cobwebs and nails a big right, rocking Krista! She falls into the ropes, but rebounds off them and lunges at Leon with a forearm strike that sends him staggering across the ring.

COLE
This is breaking down into a fistfight!

Leant up against the ropes Leon summons some energy and with an angry growl, he turns and runs at Krista... right into a spinning heel kick!! A dazed look washes over on Leon's face and Krista sees her chance, shoving him down and covering...


1...



2...



No!

Leon gets back up and in his dazed state, throws a wild right hand. Too wild, Krista seeing it coming a mile away and ducking, catching Leon with the Side Effect! Hook of the leg again....


1...



2...



No!

Krista climbs out of the ring and heads to the top rope.

KRISTA
(unable to talk, Krista says, in sign language...)



Krista leaps off the top and connects with a Missile Dropkick!!

KRISTA


Cover...


1...



2...



NO!

Trying to roll out of the ring, Leon is caught and dragged back by Krista. Unleashing a series of right hands she backs Leon up against the ropes and looks to send him off with an irish whip, but gets reversed. Leon sticks out an arm, looking to hook Krista for a hiptoss. Able to counter in mid-air though, Krista lands on her feet, quickly springing back up and going for KIDOLO... NO!! Leon trips Krista up and tries to apply the LIONTAMER!!!!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

COLE
Krista got caught! And if Leon can just turn her over we might have a new World Champion!

COACH
Turn Leon, turn!

Fighting with all she's got left Krista refuses to be turned. As she feels herself being turned slowly one way though, she's forced to act and twists her well-controlled body back the other way. Leon is caught by surprised and sent spinning through the air! He rolls back to his feet, walking right into Krista and a SUPERKICK! But Leon doesn't go down and fires a SUPERKICK of his own in desperation! Both drop to a knee, shook by the glancing blows.

COLE
What a battle this is turned into. Krista knows she's hurt and is trying to put this one away, Leon much the same knowing how resiliant Krista can be.

Both champion and challenger rest on their knees for a few seconds before Leon drags himself back up. But suddenly, Krista pops up and catches him by surprise, going for KIDOLOGY...



...BUT GETS SHOVED OFF!! As Krista rolls through, she lands on one knee, a sudden look of horror on her face as Leon spins around...



...NO!! Krista DUCKS the lethal Rolling Sobat to the face and as Leon turns back around, SHE BLASTS HIM WITH KIDOLOGY!!!!!!!!

"YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

COLE
BAM! THAT'S IT, KIDOLOGY, COVER HIM!!

Leon is stricken and surely out...


1...





2...





MORGAN CLIMBS TO THE APRON AND DISTRACTS THE REFEREE!!!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

COLE
Aw, DAMNIT!! This match was over!!

COACH
Not neccessarily.

COLE
Coach, Leon is OUT! He just got saved by his loyal little follower!

Morgan keeps the referee's attention, pleading with him not to count Leon down. Still with Leon covered, Krista looks around wondering where her three count is and her eyes roll as she finally spots what's going on. She grumpily climbs back to her feet and stomps over to Morgan, who, seeing Krista coming, starts to warn her to stay back. But Krista doesn't and Morgan starts to make a move, prompting the referee to desperately grab hold of her by the wrists!

COACH
HEY!

COLE
Thank God, get control of her! Morgan's going to do something stupid unless we get somebody out here right now!

The referee restrains a now screaming Morgan, preventing Krista from being blasted, long enough for Krista to casually run the ropes and bump the Women's Champion off the apron to the arena floor!

"YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

COACH
And you mean to tell me this poor girl isn't victimised? The referee's manhandling here, Krista's throwing her around!

Krista looks down at Morgan, who looks up at her fearfully. Shaking her head, the World Champion turns back to the action and bends down, going to pick Leon up. She drags him up by the hair... BUT SUDDENLY GETS SURPRISED WITH AN INSIDE CRADLE BY THE CHALLENGER!!

COLE
WAIT A MINUTE!! NO!!


1...





2...







NO!! KICKOUT!!!!

"YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!"

COLE
Oh my, Krista almost got caught, Rodez laying in wait like a snake in the grass!

Quickly back to their feet, Krista and Leon charge in towards each other. Leon is able to react quickest though, catching hold of Krista's clothesline attempt. Wringing her wrist, Leon places his foot against the BUTT of Krista's jaw and falls back, jamming her down against the sole of his boot!!

"OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

COLE
The Soul Destroyer! And could this spell a soul destroying defeat for Krista!?

Leon rolls Krista over and hooks the leg...


1...




2...




KICKOUT!

Seething, Leon sits on his knees and glares at the referee.

COACH
Leon thought that was it and I don't think he's the only one.

Grabbing hold of Krista's flowing blond hair Leon starts to drag her off the mat and ominously makes a throat slitting gesture, signalling the end. Crouching down, he takes Krista up, into an electric chair position.

COLE
Oh no. We've seen this before, Leon going to try and compress Krista's neck right through her shoulders!

Leon walks out towards the middle of the ring and reaches up, trying to gain control of her head. But Krista starts to fight it. Raining down punches to the top of the head, she manages to fight Leon off. She then pushes up off his head, spinning around and countering with a Hurricanrana!! Leon goes sliding out of the ring and once he has his bearings, heads for the timekeeper's table to grab a chair.

COLE
Now what!?

COACH
I think Leon's had enough Cole.

Carrying the chair back to the ring The Fallen Idol tries to climb into the ring with it, but gets cut off by Krista! The World Champion kicks at Leon in a desperate attempt to keep him and the weapon out of the ring. Behind her though, Morgan Nerdly slides into the ring, leaving her surrounded! The referee orders Morgan to leave the ring, but the look in her eyes tells him that's not happening and he calls for the bell!


*DINGDINGDING!*

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

COLE
The referee is throwing this one out and I can't really blame him!

Krista gets a firm kick in on Leon and sends him to the arena floor, allowing her to round on Morgan. A stand-off develops between the two vastly different women, allowing Leon to sneak back into the ring and JAM THE POINT OF THE CHAIR INTO KRISTA'S THROAT!!!!

COLE
OH! What a wicked shot!!

Leon stomps on the prone body of Krista, throwing the steel chair away in frustrations. Morgan is still fidgeting in the corner and Leon motions for her to calm down, calling her off in effect.

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, the referee has stopped this match and has ruled the winner, as a result of a disqualification... and STILL OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION... KRISTA ISADORA DUUUUUNNCCAAAAAANN!!!

"YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

COLE
Well that's a popular decision here in San Juan but Krista is in no condition to celebrate here!

Eyes narrowing at the sound of the announcement, Leon realises his title opportunity is gone and looks back over at Morgan. This time he doesn't want calm. Instead, he instructs her, directing her to pick Krista back up. The referee tries to put a stop to this, but is shoved to the mat by Leon and sent outside.

COACH
Leon didn't get the title, but I think he's gonna get the other half of what he wanted, Krista's broken soul!

Morgan hauls the helpless Krista up onto her knees and is passed the steel chair by Leon. Under his instructions, she holds the chair in front of her face, while Leon takes a step back and lines her up for the Rolling Sobat!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."

Suddenly, Leon's eye is caught just as he prepares the kick, as JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN slides into the ring!! Sprinting across she tackles Morgan to the ground, saving her mother! The crowd go wild as Jade and Morgan go at it, a furious battle on the mat. Looking around, Leon realises the jig is up and quietly slips out of the ring, before D*LUX can come diving in! With Leon gone, the boys quickly rush over to the Duncans, Shayne checking on Krista while Tyler tries to prise Jade off of Morgan.

COLE
What a chaotic scene here at AngleSlam, and most importantly here, Krista Isadora Duncan is still the World Champion!

Leon moves around the ring and eventually grabs a hold of Morgan, pulling her out from under Jade and away from the ring. The raging Women's Champion has to be physically restrained by Leon, until she realises what's going on and is calmed down, obediantly being dragged up the aisle. Krista sits up in the ring, clearly struggling for breath as D*LUX and Jade check on her condition. She looks right past them all, glaring back at Leon as he and Morgan back up the aisle with vindictive looks on their faces.

COLE
Krista has survived here tonight in San Juan, both with her title and with her health... but just barely.

COACH
And Leon might have wasted away his World Title shot tonight, but I don't think this is over yet. Look at them eyes Michael. He ain't done with Krista. Not yet.

COLE
Folks its time for our arm wrestling challenge pitting Mister Dick, alleged owner of a super penis, against Biff Atlas, alleged owner of super strength.

Right on cue, Biff bursts through the entrance doors and finds himself greeted by warm reception from San Juan. That could be due to his PRL t-shirt, but it could also be due to the fact that he’s just a lovable dude. Biff works the crowd up by raising the roof, apparently not realizing its not 2002 anymore.

“WHO LET THE DOGS OUT?” He shouts “WOOF! WOOF! WOO-OOF!” Poor Biff. Poor out of touch with pop culture Biff.

COACH
This guy is biting off more than he can chew. At least he wasn’t dumb enough to have a match with Mister Dick.

COLE
Dumb? He won the last time they fought.

COACH
That was due to miscommunication from ThunderKid and Mister Dick. Any other time and Mister Dick mops the floor with Biff.

Biff heads into the ring and proceeds to do elaborate, unnecessary, and utterly useless arm stretches. But, the audience loves every minute of it.

COLE
Let's not forget that Biff is a former body builder and power lifter. If he does have "super strength" its from his years spent toiling away inside gyms across Southern California.

COACH
This fool thinks he's on some Mohindir from Heroes shit, got super strength all of a sudden and wants to take on the world.

WOMANIZER, WOMANIZER, WOMANIZER

COLE
The Urban Cowboy, The Human Hard On, Mister Dick making his appearance at Angleslam!

There’s far less love from the OAOAST Marks for Mister Dick, glad in glimmering gold robe and silver chaps, and a leather clad Malaysia in bikini bottoms and a corset. Mister Dick twirls beneath the golden shower of pyro, before throwing off his sequined robe. He flexes his impressive muscles, hitting numerous poses all designed to intimidate the audience.

COLE
A slightly different look tonight for Mister Dick, bleaching his hair blond and letting it grow out longer. And yet he still looks like a sleazebag!

The Urban Cowboy On dives into the ring, where he humps the mat while shooting titillated and aroused eyes at females in the front row Upon getting to his feet, Mister Dick procures a microphone.

“BOOOOOOOO!”

MISTER DICK
Shadup, I ain’t talkin’ to none of ya’ll, just to Biff. Look at you, just look at you. You think yer some kinda god damn Superman? Yer Bruce Wayne now, is that it? You the Batman, boy? I think yer batshit and I ain’t got no respect for you, or your kin, you miserable creepy bastard. That’s what you are, ya hear me, boy? Creepy and miserable.

BIFF
A true hero never lets his villain rile his emotions. I stand firm against you. You will not intimidate me.

MISTER DICK
A true super hero blah blah blah, why don’t you just shut the hell on up! I called ya a miserable bastard because you is one. Yer a god damnded disgrace to the human race, and I hope the damn scoreboard falls on your body and kills you dead. Then when your mama is crying about you at yer funeral I just hope that lightning strikes that bitch dead. That’s what I hope, boy!

BIFF
Are you threatening me and my family? Do I look like the kind of guy you should be threatening? Well, do I?

MALAYSIA


MISTER DICK
You look stupider than cow shit on a Christmas tree, boy! You ain’t no superpowered, super hero, and if you is, then that means I’m god himself because ain’t no way no how you’re stronger than me. You hear that? I am genetically superior to you! Strength wise,looks wise, and genital wise, and we can have a wrasslin match fer that last one to!

COLE
I can only hope!

MISTER DICK
Let’s get this crap started, I gotta be in the tanning booth by 9:30.

Mister Dick tosses the microphone away, not caring who he nearly hits with it. He keeps his blue eyes locked onto Biff, as he nears the arm wrestling table. Biff remains calm and unafraid, and stretches his muscles.

MISTER DICK
I see you ain’t got super speed. Get to the god damn table!

Biff sneers at Mister Dick for his lack of manners. He decides to teach etiquette lessons another day and slides to the table. Both men look into each other’s eyes, staring stares of anger and violence. But before it can erupt in a full out brawl, the referee forces the two men to lock hands.

REFEREE
GO!

There’s an immediate struggle as the ballet of movement strength begins. Both superstars wage a strenuous war, one that taxes every muscle in their body.

COACH
If Biff did have super strength, wouldn’t he be crushing Mister Dick by now?

Though he’s not dominating the Human Hard On, Biff is firm control of the contest. The possibility of a loss frightens Mister Dick deep into his heart. It forces him to exert all his might to battle back against Biff’s assault.

COLE
Like I said earlier, Biff used to be a powerlifter and body builder, strength has always ran in his blood.

COACH
Yeah, its just intelligence that is out to lunch.

“BIFF! BIFF! BIFF!” San Juan sings, giving Biff the added momentum he needs to push Mister Dick’s arm even closer to the table. Sweat rips a path across Mister Dick’s face, a product of his continual fretting over a loss. His worries are not unfounded; Biff continues to press his advantage, endangering Mister Dick’s hopes of a victory.

COLE
It could be over soon! And how would Mister Dick show his face to the rest of the Deadly Alliance if he lost this arm wrestling contest?

We may never know the answer to such a question due to a panic filled Mister Dick ripping his hands away from his foe. As the crowd boos, Biff looks at Misetr Dick with confusion and a hint of anger. But, Mister Dick couldn’t care less about Biff’s emotions, and he leaps over the table to tackle the would-be super hero.

“BOOOOOOOOOOO!”

The two trade hands on the floor, with Malaysia loving every second of the furious fight. Biff is able to use his (super?) strength to shove Mister Dick away from him. They both rise to their feet, and continue their crazed slug fest. Mister Dick resorts to using knees to attack his opponent. But Biff’s strong midsection reflects the attack, and he comes back at Mister Dick with more power than ever.

COLE
Its broken down here in Puerto Rico!

Biff stands near the ropes ready to pounce upon Mister Dick. But the Cocky Prick moves much faster than his foe, and he strikes Biff in the face with a Stiff Kick. The blow upends Biff, and sends him toppling over the ring ropes. But much to his amazement and the fans’ he lands on his feet! Strangely Biff is tickled with delight and wonder at his soft and safe landing. Such a harmless fall can only be attributed.

BIFF
I….I…I…I CAN FLY!!!!!!!

That mantra is chanted by Biff as he runs up the entrance ramp, eager to share his good news with Vinny.

MISTER DICK


COLE
A no contest to this arm wrestling bout, and in my view I think these two will be seeing each other again.

ZERO HOUR: GAME OVER

LIVE!
SUNDAY NIGHT, SEPTEMBER 27
PITTSBURGH, PA

ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW!

Makes Me Wonder plays and receives a great reception from the capacity crowd. D*LUX, wearing matching red denim pants and red denim jackets, stride onto the stage. Behind them comes the cheerleader dressed pair of sisters, Maya Duncan-Blanchard and Jade Rodez-Duncan. Together all four work up the roaring San Juan audience, the girls with their cheer routine, and D*LUX by hopping happily across the stage.

BUFFER
The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of sixty minutes. Now making their way to the ring from the state of Michigan, being accompanied by Maya Duncan-Blanchard and jade Rodez-Duncan, they are “Showtime” Shayne, “Tremendous” Tyler, D*LUUUUXXXXXX!

Huge cheers go up for the teen idols, and they reply in kind by slapping hands down the entrance ramp. Behind them Maya and Jade continue to work up a crowd that’s already in a frenzy.

COACH
Man, all this cause Anglesault and Josie cowed to Krista’s demands and hired an 8th grader.

“I’m in 9th grade!” Maya barks back. “9th grade, people!”

COLE
This all started because The Heavenly Rockers believed that the money used to pay Maya was taken out of Holly’s check, causing a contract dispute that’s ongoing to this very day. In fact some are saying Holly might very well sign with UFC to be an interviewer and highlight show host.

After they enter the ring, Tyler stands atop the turnbuckles with arms raised, while Shayne stands next to him on the ring apron, clapping his hands and warming up the audience.

COLE
The confidence looks to be back for D*LUX, and they’ll need it against three time tag team champions The Heavenly Rockers. These two teams met each other on HeldDOWN~! Now minus Krista and Leon they’ll fight once more.

HEY! WAIT! I GOT A NEW COMPLAINT!

The San Juan audience has a compliant themselves, namely that they have no desire to see The Rockers. Multicolored spotlights swing across the entrance stage at a frantic pace. Logan strides out first, jamming on the air guitar, and wearing a black leather jacket and long leather pants with bloodied sword running down the right leg, and a crazed looking angel running down the left. Synth’s attire is more traditional with white tights with blue clouds and white boots and elbow pads along with his baby blue tinted goggles. Along with Abdullah and Logan, he prays for safety and victory in this upcoming bout.

COLE
The volatile kings of rock n wrestling are headed to what should be a violent culture clash with the all American teen idols, D*LUX. And in their corner the second generation stars of the Duncan Family. Its like the Patridge Family Vs the Osbourne Family.

BUFFER
And the opponents, they hail from Sin City, Nevada, and are three time tag team champions, being accompanied by the Speaker Of The Prophets Abdullah Abir Nerdly, they are SYTH ABDUAL JABBAR, THE MACHO MACHO MANN, LOGAN MANN, THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS!

“This one’s for you, Holly!” Logan sings into a camera that follows his team down the ramp.

COACH
You know what this is also for? Maya costing Synth his chance at the world title only two weeks ago on HeldDOWN~!

COLE
The bad blood runs thick here at Angleslam.

DING DING DING

COLE
Lots of bad blood in this one.

COACH
You just said that.

COLE
Burn in hell!

Logan turns an evil eye towards Maya and Jade as he circles about the ring. Eventually he turns his stern glare onto Bryant. The Tremendous one returns the expression. Pushed to the edge by that non verbal taunt, Mann begins throwing his wicked left hands! He lands them with enough force and power that he’s able to back the super-hot teen idol into the ropes. Mann stalks the path he created, and leans into Bryant to throw him into the opposite ropes. When Bryant nears him, the MACHO Macho man swings out a lunging left hand. The blow narrowly misses Bryant, who bends his body around his foe. Behind Logan, Tyler has the advantage. As such he crooks Logan’s arm behind his, and slides the rockstar down into a backslide pin! Clem Buzzlefoxer scores the fall….

ONE!

Mann kicksout, and mutters complaints about Bryant’s speedy nature. Logan decides its best to keep the boy toy grounded and locked down. This leads him to engage in a lockup with Tyler. Mann’s strength immediately overpowers Bryant and he pushes the lightweight into a neutral corner. The elderly referee calls for a clean break. However that’s an order heard and ignored by Mann, who slams repeated shoulders into Tyler’s lean midsection.

Maya turns towards the crowd, and prepares to incite their enthusiasm, “ONE TWO THREE FOUR, WHO’S THE GUY THAT WE ADORE?”

“TYLER! TYLER! TYLER!” the teenage girls respond back in earnest.

COACH
She’s even better than her sister at the damn cheerleading gimmick. What won’t Jade fail in doing?

Maya’s song replenishes Tyler’s fighting spirit, and he shocks his foe by rolling forward and pulling him down into another pinfall!

ONE!

TWO!

Mann pops out the pin, looking perturbed that Tyler even had his shoulders down in the first place. Bryant feels a surge of confidence and waves on Logan to the crowd’s delight. Mann says thanks but no thanks and cowardly applies the tag with Synth.

“HE’S GOT NO POWER, HE’S SOFT AS A FLOWER, EVERYONE KNOWS THAT LOGAN’S A COWARD!” Maya screams.

“LOGAN’S A PUSSY! LOGAN’S A PUSSY! LOGAN’S A PUSSY!” the OAOAST Marks bleat.

Maya listens with confusion, “I didn’t say that word!”

Synth’s presence is immediately felt by Tyler as the drummer of THR smashes his face with a trio of elbow strikes. Tyler staggers back a few steps, but regains his strength and comes back with a left jab. But Synth blocks the strike with ease and responds with a headbutt that leaves an imprint of Synth’s goggles on Tyler’s forehead.

“BOOOOOOOO!”

COLE
I’m with Puerto Rico, if you’re going to use those things as weapons you shouldn’t even be allowed to wear them. As far as I know Synth has no condition that forces him to wear gigantic snowboarding goggles.

Synth traps his opponent inside a front facelock, and then lifts him up for a vertical suplex. But Tyler manages to slip out the hold and land behind Synth. Before SAJ can even react, the Tremendous one swings his arm around his neck in a headlock. This hold endures for only several quick seconds, and then Synth shoves his foe into the ropes. A blind tag is made by Shayne Brave, who climbs atop the corner posts. Synth keeps his focus on Tyler, dodging a lariat. But his dodge carries him directly into the missile dropkick from the adored grappler.

“YEAAAAAAAAA!”

COLE
Great teamwork from D*LUX. They’re working like a well oiled machine once again, and credit goes to the Duncan girls.

Jade and Maya cheer their boys on, as Shayne hops back and froth while waiting for Synth’s rise. Eventually he grows impatient of Synth’s stalling and starts to pull Synth upright by his goggles. Annoyed at someone touching his Oakley goggles, Synth attacks Shayne with a low blow. There’s an immediate admonishment form referee Buzzlefoxer, but Synth doesn’t give it a care in the world. Instead he lifts Brave up by the waist and gives him further misery with an atomic drop.

COACH
There goes the dream of millions of women everywhere.

COLE
I talked to confirmed OAOAST Mark Drew Barrymore, and she said Shayne is her favorite performer in the company.

COACH
Nigga, shut up, you didn’t talk to Drew Barrymoore, you didn’t even talk to your stank ho mama.

Synth next latches onto Shayne’s arms, and with a mighty and angry roar strikes at Brave with a lariat. However Shayne ducks his head beneath Synth’s attacking arm, and drags him downwards with a neckbreaker.

“THERE CUTE, THEIR SASSY, THEY’LL CHOP YOU LIKE AN AXE, THEY’RE D*LUX, THEY’RE D*LUX, GOOOOOOOO D*LUX!” Maya sings

“D*LUX! D*LUX! D*LUX!”

Synth gets to his feet under his own willpower, but is immediately assaulted by overhand lefts from Brave. Having weakened Synth with these shots, Brave slams his knee into his chubby midsection, and then secures an underhook. Within seconds Synth is being brought to the canvas by an underhook suplex. A pinfall follows….

ONE!

TWO!

Synth’s shoulder comes off the canvas. The fans are displeased but D*LUX’s management team urges them to fight on. That’s precisely what Brave does as he takes hold of Synth’s arm and pulls him upright. But Synth begins walloping him with a barrage of punches, and finishes that flurry off with a discus elbow that floors Brave. While the fans’ worry over any damage to Brave’s handsome visage, SAJ retreats to his corner and slaps the outstretched hand of Logan Mann.

“KNEES, SHOULDERS, HEAD AND TOES, RAISE YOUR HAND IF LOGAN BLOWS!” Maya screams, as a good majority of the audience raises their hand.

Logan scowls at the unfriendly OAOAST Marks, a distraction that costs him when Brave dropkicks him in the back. Logan falls into the ropes, his face twisted by pain. Leaving him to grouse, Brave runs the ropes. But as he begins his return, Mann makes a recovery and comes charging at the handsome fighter. Brave, however, is well prepared for Mann’s arrival and slashes at Logan with a leg lariat. Continuing to cheer on the boybander, the crowd sings loud as Brave begins an assent to the top rope. Maya and Jade shout loud words of encouragement as he stands up to his full five feet and nine inches. With fans murmuring their amazement, Brave leaps forward with a picture perfect elbow drop. But the landing is far removed from perfection; Abdullah pulls Logan out the way and his opponent smashes his arm into the canvas!

“OOOOOOOOH!” the fans react, taken aback by the gruesome miss. Logan is all smiles and goes for a pinfall on his foe….

ONE!

TWO!

Brave kicksout, which fills the fans with delight.

COLE
Shayne Brave can absorb all sorts of punishment, and still keep on fighting.

Logan gets Brave to his feet and throws him into a neutral corner. The MACHO Macho man comes charging in, leaping through the air for a body splash. But Showtime slides down the ropes, causing Mann to crash stomach first into the turnbuckles. This pleases the OAOAST Marks, but annoys Abdullah who prays for Logan’s safety. Such prayers are unanswered as Brave throws the rock n wrestling legend to the ground with a back suplex! Mann is sprawled on the canvas, suffering through crippling pain. This gives Brave the moment he needs to get onto the second rope. From there he flies off his perch, extending both his legs and letting them slam into Mann with a leg drop! With the fans cheering and shouting, Brave hooks onto the legs for a fall…

ONE!

TWO!

Logan kicksout. Abdullah is thrilled by that simple result, and offers prayers and tithing to the lord above.

COACH
I gotta say its been a very even match so far.

COLE
That’s right, no one has gained the upper hand. I think The Rockers need to use their brawling ability if they want this win. They’re better “fighters” than “wrestlers”

Brave applies the tag with his Tremendous partner. Together they stand hunched over with eager eyes waiting for Mann to rise. Their patience is rewarded, as they’re able to rearrange Mann’s facial structure with double superkicks!

“My lonlieness is killing me” Maya sings “I must confess I still believe, when I’m not with you I lose my mind, give me a sign,”

“HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIME!” the sold out San Juan crowd sings.

After Brave moves out the ring, Tyler hooks onto both of Logan’s leather covered legs for a pinfall….

ONE!


TWO!

Mann throws his shoulder up, showing that he’s very much alive.

“WE LOVE TYLER! WE LOVE TYLER! WE LOVE TYLER!” the girls sing, led on by an enthusiastic Jade and Maya.

Mann rolls to his feet, adjusting his baggy leather pants and shooting an evil stare at Bryant. The two ring warriors come together in the center of the ring trading shots with raw fury. But the wicked left hand of Logan is too much for Tyler to bear, and his knees buckle beneath their power. This leaves him defenseless and Logan is able to grab hold of his head, twist it around and sit out for a neckbreaker! Mann then instantly leaps onto Brave’s body and begins pummeling him with those dangerous left hands.

COLE
When Logan gets to firing left hands, that’s no one in the world who can really defend against them.

At the referee’s demand, Logan ceases his punching and removes his opponent from the canvas. An irish whip sends Bryant across the ring. Coming back he leaps into a cross body block. However, Mann catches him in his arms. She shakes his head and offers the audience a cruel and infuriating smile, before swinging Bryant out for a modified neckbreaker. Bryant hits the ground with a hard thud, and hasn’t a moment to recover before Logan is battering his neck with stomps. Jade and Maya urge their boy to fight past the pain. But all looks hopeless when Logan drops a pointed left fist into Brave’s throat.

COACH
The Rockers are on top of their game. Set this boy up for a Percussion DDT and get some leverage to bring back Holly.

Scrambling back to his feet, Bryant raises his arms to shield off any oncoming blows. But Logan hits with deadly precision, and his left hands cut right through Brave’s defenses. This forces Brave to be pushed into the corner, where Logan uses his leather boots and raised leg to choke the poor Detroit native. After receiving a generous five count from Buzzlefoxer, Mann ceases his dastardly choke hold. While Bryant hacks and wheezes like a chain smoker, Mann drags him down the ropes in order to work a double team.

“BOOOOOOOOOO!” the audience hisses spurred on by Jade and Maya.

Synth and Mann grab Bryant inside a double front facelock. Together they raise him into the air, before rushing downwards and slamming his neck into the canvas. Synth then leaves the ring, leaving Mann able to make the cover…

ONE!

TWO!

The fans are overjoyed to see Shayne kick out the pin.

“SHOWTIME! SHOWTIME! SHOWTIME!” they sing led on by Jade and Maya

Back on their feet, the two grapplers trade punches. Once again the overwhelming power of Logan’s left hand wins him this battle. He forces him into a neutral corner, where Abdullah holds onto his ankle to prevent escape. Maya and Jade are furious as they can only watch Shayne’s stomach be mangled with hard kicks from Logan. After a prolonged beating, Logan removes Bryant from the corner and throws him into the Heavenly Rocker’s base. A tag is made with Synth , and the two begin scheming a double team. With plans set, The Rockers trap their foe inside a double facelock. Twin finger twirls of DEATH incite the crowd’s anger. With all of Puerto Rico against them, The Rockers happily fall backwards to plant Shayne with a double Percussion DDT!

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Jade frets on the outside as Synth makes a cover….

ONE!

TWO!

Maya saves the day by putting Tyler’s foot on the ropes.

“YEAAAAAAA!”

COACH
No fair! She’s cheating! She’s cheating!

SAJ seems to agree with Coach, and chews out Buzzlefoxer for Maya’s interference. Next, Synth hammers Tyler’s back as the teeny bopper sensation begins to rise. Crippling his foe with those attacks, Synth puts himself on a run to the ropes.. When he comes back he strikes Tyler in the neck with a lariat! Bryant is thrown to the ground, and pains spread all throughout his body. His condition is worsened when Synth drops to his side and hooks on a reverse chinlock.

“Yes, my child, submit and injure this pagan non believer!” Abdullah yells.

Synth happily follows orders and rips and tugs at Bryant’s neck. On the ring apron Brave’s worry causes him to pace and back and forth.

“Come on, Shayne, you can get out this!” Maya screams, earning herself a fierce stare from Abdullah and Mann.

Tyler’s face screams agony, even as he tries to keep his hurt groans silenced. The pain is almost too much to tolerate, though, with Synth stretching and cranking out his neck..

COACH
Even if he doesn’t get the submission here, this sets up for the Percussion.

“Come on, guys, lets hear it for Tyler!” Jade shouts to the lethargic audience.

Their energy suddenly surges, “LET’S GO TYLER! LET’S GO TYLER! LET’S GO TYLER!”

Abdullah tries to get the fans’ to fall silent, but all his pleas do is increase the enthusiasm of the chant. Tyler gets a boost of strength from the audience and finds the ability to begin rising to his feet. In response, SAJ attempts to tighten his hold in order to lock Bryant down. But, the teen idol begins throwing elbows into Synth’s ribcage. Those elbows play their role perfectly and begin weakening Synth’s grip.

COLE
Synth is desperately holding onto that chinlock.

After several body blows land with pinpoint accuracy Synth has little choice but to relinquish the hold. But this only stirs anger and his heart, and it leads him to throw a wild lariat at Tyler. But Tremeondous Tyler ducks beneath the attack and rolls towards his corner. There his hand meets the outstretched hand of Shayne Brave for an important tag.

“YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

The moment Brave enters the ring, Synth descends upon him with overhand punches. But Brave easily blocks the attacks, and doubles Synth over with a boot to his pudgy stomach. He then whips Synth into a neutral corner and follows him in to strike him with a daring cross body block. The momentum of the move carries him outside of the ring, but he’s fortunate to land with his feet on the apron. However, Abdullah tries to hinder his offense by latching onto his ankle. Brave tries to shake the speaker for the prophets off, but its little Maya that rids Brave of Abdullah’s meddling by spearing him to the ground.

“YEAAAAAAAAA!”

COLE
Oh my! Oh my!

Free from Abdullah’s interference, Brave is able to climb up to the top rope. He waits for Synth to stumble away from the corner, before he dismounts. His legs stretch out and his feet strike his foein the back with a missile dropkick! The fans cheer as Synth topples over to the mat. Brave then hooks onto his left leg for a pinfall….

ONE!


TWO!

But Mann breaks up the pinfall!

“BOOOOOOOOO!”

The angry fans are quickly given reasons to cheer as Bryant runs into the ring to clothesline Mann over the ropes. The OAOAST Marks explode with pleasure as they watch the hated MACHO macho Mann take a nasty tumble to the outside mats.

COLE
So much for being MACHO!

Mann hops to his feet, seething with rage, and ready for a fight. Brave brings a fight and a whole lot more to his opponent with a diving shoulder block from over the ropes. The two men crash into the ground, while the audience puts out huge cheers for the daring display.

“D*LUX! D*LUX! D*LUX!”

COACH
Its all up to Synth now. Come on, Synth!

Boos ring out from the audience, and their eyes turn towards the entrance ramp as HOLLY marches her combat boots down it. Jade looks panicked but Maya actually dares her to approach.

“Whatever you say, brat!” Holly shouts.

COLE
This is a surprise, folks! This is a huge surprise!

Holly moves faster and faster towards Maya, and her look grows more sinister with each step she takes. Jade realizes her younger sister will be in grave danger, once Holly nears her. As such the eldest Duncan girl charges at the Angel Of Death. But Holly meets her arrival, with a hard boot to the gut. Seconds later she crashes Jade’s head into the steel ramp with a Percusion DDT! Both the fans and the distracted referee admonish Holly. But the AOD couldn’t care less, standing over Jade and shouting to Maya that she’ll be next.

COLE
Unbelievable! She’s threatening somebody almost thirteen years her junior.

COACH
It ain’t nothing, I been smackin up 8th grade hos in Dairy Queen since 99. It dirty how them hos try to do me over a peanut butter blizzard.

Inside the ring Synth has Bryant locked inside a front facelock, the set up for the Percussion DDT! But Tyler manages a surprise escape by lifting Synth onto his shoulders

“YEAAAAAAAAAA!”

COLE
These OAOAST Marks cheering for the Idolizer! Vintage Tyler Bryant!

Tyler prepares to sling Synth off his shoulder for the deadly neckbreaker variant. But before he can even start the motion, Abdullah strikes him in the face with the Holy Book! Both competitors fall backwards, with Tyler having a tougher landing due to him breaking Synth’s fall. The Synthmeister is no fool and quickly realizes he’s in a pinning position. He hooks Tyler’s legs and orders the referee to make the crucial count.

ONE!


TWO!


THREE!

COLE
Damn it, no!

DING DING DING

“BOOOOOOOOOO!” the audience vocalizes their rage, as Synth and Abdullah make hasty retreats from the ring. On the outside they gather with Logan, who has joined Holly for a celebratory and rather R-rated liplock.

COLE
They stole one! The Heavenly Rockers stole this one right out of D*LUX’s hands. Despicable.

COACH
You just mad that Holly sonned you and your inside sources. Can’t wait to see her at UFC 102. Dumbass, you oughta drop dead.

BUFFER
Your winners as a result of a pinfall….THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS!

COLE
I have a strong feeling these two teams are going to be continuing their rivalry for a long time to come.

ANGLESLAM

DIRECTED BY
Tony149

WRITTEN BY
Alfdogg
Tony149
King Cucaracha
Patty O'Green
Zack Malibu
EWC
liverbird

GRAPHICS
Patty O'Green

OAOAST CREATED BY
cobainwasmurdered
Tony149
Anglesault

© 2009 OAOAST Entertainment
All Rights Reserved.