The Ross Report for August 9!

[Guest Downhome]

Here we go, and this should be fun. My money is on him NOT mentioning the Smackdown rating, heheheh...

 

Greetings from under the 200X Black Resistol Hat from the Sunshine State of Florida. I am on what our President calls a “working vacation,” writing a few stories for our new cookbook due out in May of 2003.

The WWE Superstars and staff made it to Melbourne, Australia safely, and the Fan Frenzy activities are heavily attended and running smoothly. This is a very good group of travelers who, I am sure, will represent WWE very well during their stay in the Land Down Under. Many Superstars will be involved in numerous TV, radio and personal appearances during the four-day stay. Hollywood Hulk Hogan was originally advertised to make this trip, but a lower back injury would not allow him to make the extremely long flight to Australia. Hogan, who turns 49 this weekend, has been working through a painful back condition the past several weeks and it appears the wear and tear over many years in the ring is starting to catch up to The Hulkster. He will be examined soon to determine the extent of his injury. Hogan has had difficulty the past several weeks simply bending over to lace his boots. Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman have been added to this event to replace Hogan as best they can, and the live event lineup that has been finalized looks very strong on paper. With the inclusion of Raw talents Triple H, Chris Jericho, Lance Storm, Christian and Test to this SmackDown! event, the night should be most interesting. Our track record over the past several years at live events for the advertised talent to appear as scheduled is very good and it is certainly unfortunate that Hollywood Hulk Hogan will be unable to travel and perform in Melbourne. However, our fans attending will still see an awesome live event despite Hogan’s absence. I know Hulk was looking forward to this event.

 

Valbowski and Maven are both on this trip but will not see any significant in-ring duty due to injuries. Val was hurt over the weekend in a weightlifting accident where a piece of equipment fell on his head, which required approximately 20 stitches, and hurt his neck. Maven’s broken leg is not healing as well as expected, and his ankle is still significantly swollen, which is problematic. Some talents would have opted to not make this long plane trip with similar aches and pains, and Val and Maven are to be commended for their professionalism and willingness to fulfill their commitments.

 

The main event for Melbourne will be a Triple Threat match for the WWE Undisputed Championship pitting The Rock vs. Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar. Another outstanding contest will feature Edge vs. Jericho. The Un-Americans will defend the tag titles, and Hurricane Helms challenges Jamie Noble for the Cruiserweight Championship. Nine matches total make up this SmackDown!/Raw live event.

 

Saturday’s main event will be the first for Triple H since undergoing elbow surgery several weeks ago.

 

With The Rock’s movie schedule as it is and Hogan’s back problems, the competition for the coveted “top spots,” especially on the SmackDown! roster, seem to really be wide open, which should result in some new talents being provided with excellent opportunities to move up. This process seems to have already started.

 

It was great seeing Kane this week, and he looks to be very well-rested and in great shape following his bicep injury. The young monster’s return is much-anticipated, but the question is, will he be appearing on Raw or SmackDown!?

 

Bull Buchanan has looked good in recent matches and may be closer to being utilized on SmackDown! much sooner than later. Buchanan, a native Georgian, is 6-feet-6 and 260 pounds. And moves like a cat. He is at his best when he stays very aggressive and takes advantage of his athleticism, which he was done in recent weeks. Bull is a high-character talent who has certainly paid his “dues” and deserves a chance to hunt with the big dogs.

 

Ric Flair will lead the Florida Gators on the field when they play their in-state rival Miami Hurricanes, The Rock’s alma mater, in September in Gainesville. The Nature Boy grew up in Minnesota, has lived in North Carolina for years, but roots for Florida during the college football season. Go figure.

 

I would love to see a best-of-seven series between RVD and Y2J. They have great chemistry from where I sit.

 

Y2J’s band Fozzy will play at The World on Friday night, August 23 in Times Square in New York City. Tickets are available now for the high-energy concert.

 

I’m liking the Rock-Lesnar training videos we have been seeing on TV. Great stuff. The Rock is scheduled to be in Seattle both Monday for Raw, which is sold out, and Tuesday for the SmackDown! taping.

 

I’m as anxious as any fan to see what Shawn Michaels has left in his tank for his scheduled “fight” with Triple H at SummerSlam. I do not think anyone will be disappointed. Great in-ring performers tell a story with their physical actions and the emotions they create by what we see, and HBK and Triple H are two of the best ring technicians in recent memory.

If villains want to be jeered, then why do they break the majority of the rules directly in front of the referee? The antagonist masters that stand out in my mind were the rugged sons of guns who were expert in rulebreaking that was more often than not concealed from the referee. Defiance or cheating in front of the official is a great way to be “cool” or cheered in today’s marketplace, unless I’m having another “senior moment.”

 

Someone suggested to me that our own broadcasting colleague, The Coach, would be a great “Carlton” if the “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” ever begins producing again. That might work, but for goodness sakes, keep the Kansas farmer away from the cows!

 

Tommy Dreamer seems to have found a home in the Hardcore Division on Raw. Dreamer is a very hard-working talent who flew to L.A. this week to visit the set of Tough Enough 3. ECW alumni seem to do “extremely” well in hardcore matches.

 

I’m thinking Anna Nicole Smith and TE3’s John “Big” Gaburick would make a cozy couple. Eating out would be an adventure.

 

WWE officials were pleased with Victoria’s performance on Raw this week. She still needs plenty of ring time, but has certainly earned the shot.

 

I’m not overly enamored with the names Jamal and Rosie, but I’m anxious to see the two big newcomers in a tag match on Raw.

 

Raw General Manager Eric Bischoff seems to be settling in well at our TV events. He has done a very solid job since debuting a few weeks ago. Who would have thunk it? Bischoff will be a part of the SmackDown! live event in Dallas on September 1.

 

Batista seems to be making some progress, especially when it comes to being more physical and aggressive. At 6-5 and 300 pounds, he will never be a “finesse guy.” Neither will Albert, who seems to have also stepped up some in the physicality department. Albert, a three-year starter on the O-line at Pitt, is an amazing athlete at 6-7 and 340 pounds who needs to let his mean streak flow.

 

Chris Benoit still feels he is a step away from being totally back from his nearly one-year absence from the ring following neck surgery. That’s hard for me to judge because I think Chris is already back being as good as anyone on our roster. More RVD-Benoit action someday will not hurt my feelings.

 

I would loved to have had a beverage with Gordon Solie this week but my mentor is, unfortunately, not with us any longer.

 

I will break bread with Mean Gene Okerlund, who is alive and well. Wish Bobby Heenan could join us.

 

If Kurt Angle continues to improve as we see every week, some day we may be saying, “there is Angle and then the rest of the talent.” World-class, gold medal-winning athletes who learn to entertain are a rarity.

 

Great to see the Hardys together again on Raw versus the tag champions. I wish they had more match time available to them, but that’s live TV, I guess. In any event, both Matt and Jeff are outstanding hands, in tags or singles.

 

Eddie Guerrero is amazing.

 

William Regal is teaching Harvard’s Chris Nowinski some valuable in-ring techniques.

 

I would think some talents with weight issues would be more inclined to personally address those issues but, unfortunately, that does not seem to be the case. This is not my “cryptic message of the week,” but a direct statement to those that are too heavy. More than one talent should use some self-discipline and get into “game shape”. These matters have been thoroughly addressed. Again.

 

And I’m not talking about Rey Mysterio, who continues to amaze.

 

Rico is becoming a very pleasant surprise on SmackDown!. Don’t be surprised to see this hard-working, dedicated performer see some single action soon. Rico is a very positive influence on our talent roster.

 

WWE Market Reps continue to do a fabulous job marketing our live events. Unfortunately, they often times get unjustly blamed for problems that arise at “on-sale promotions” with our talent. Recently at Madison Square Garden, Triple H signed autographs for well over two hours, but could not finish the long line of fans lined up to buy tickets for Raw and to hopefully meet “The Game.” The event started at its scheduled time of noon and then, as customary, the line was “cut off” at a certain point by MSG officials so Triple H could sign for the remaining fans. Triple H could have stayed all day and still would have not been able to get through the entire line that wrapped around MSG. We are sorry for the inconvenience this may have caused some of our most loyal fans, but the situation was unavoidable considering the size of the line and the time restraints. As my old daddy used to say, “Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.”

This week I am trying to commit to words my experiences with a wide variety of Superstars I have worked with in my 25-years-plus career for our most unique of cookbooks due out next year. I will tell of interaction with Owen Hart, Brian Pillman, Junkyard Dog, Cowboy Bill Watts, Bret Hart and Stone Cold Steve Austin, to name a few. The decades of the ‘70s, ‘80s, ‘90s until the present will be addressed with a series of short stories. I sure hope you will enjoy these personal memories of some of the most prominent Superstars and personalities I have had the privilege of working with these many years.

 

Take care and I’ll see you Monday in beautiful Seattle and back here next week.

 

JR (Boomer Sooner!)

 

...and there we go. I haven't even read all of it, but I thought I'd post it just to get the discussion going on it. I'll comment on it shortly, just like you guys will I'm sure, lol. The only thing I noticed is that he's pimping Bautista and Albert, and that ain't surprising, is it?

 

Sincerely,

...Downhome...

[Guest Just call me Dan]

RVD made it on the Ross Report!

 

And who the hell is he to poke weight jokes at ANS or "Big"?

[Guest bps "The Truth" 21]

RVD made it twice!!!!

 

WOOOOO!!!!!!!

[Guest Flyboy]

RVD made it twice!!!!

 

WOOOOO!!!!!!!

Hell yeah!

 

.... Hmmm... Best of 7 Series between RVD and Jericho would be damned good.

[Guest Nevermortal]

Bull Buchanan has looked good in recent matches and may be closer to being utilized on SmackDown! much sooner than later. Buchanan, a native Georgian, is 6-feet-6 and 260 pounds. And moves like a cat. He is at his best when he stays very aggressive and takes advantage of his athleticism, which he was done in recent weeks. Bull is a high-character talent who has certainly paid his “dues” and deserves a chance to hunt with the big dogs.

 

I'd rather have seen Mike Sanders. Who the fuck cares about Bull Fucking Buchanan? This is the man who Crash Holly beat in the KOTR first round in 2000.

 

Fuck the Hosses.

[Guest Flyboy]

I'd rather have seen Mike Sanders. Who the fuck cares about Bull Fucking Buchanan?

 

Fuck the Hosses.

Y'know that JR gets a hard-on off of Bull..... or hell, just hosses in general.

[Guest The Superstar]

Val dropped a weight on his head? Holy shit.

[Guest Nevermortal]

I’m thinking Anna Nicole Smith and TE3’s John “Big” Gaburick would make a cozy couple. Eating out would be an adventure.

 

GAH!

 

Batista seems to be making some progress, especially when it comes to being more physical and aggressive. At 6-5 and 300 pounds, he will never be a “finesse guy.” Neither will Albert, who seems to have also stepped up some in the physicality department. Albert, a three-year starter on the O-line at Pitt, is an amazing athlete at 6-7 and 340 pounds who needs to let his mean streak flow.

 

ANOTHER ALBERT PUSH?!!?!?!?!!?!

[Guest The Pessimistic Optimist]

Well, from where I stand, there is nothing wrong with pimping Bautista, because he at least looks like he has talent. Bautista needs to drop D-Von and then he can't make some strides in lets say, character. although currently he is feuding with bob "How do you like me now? you still suck" holly and val venis. Pimping albert however is just wrong in too many ways.

 

Now, I do like y2j and rvd, but right now, feuding with each other won't help either of them. jericho is damaged goods. I don't remember what match if any jericho was involved in at backlash, but jericho has last every ppv match he's been in since wrestlemania thru vengence. Two jobs to hunter, one to cena, and one to rvd. How is he a credible heel anymore? Beware of jericho, he'll put you over! ::sigh:: In my opinion the only way to have rvd vs. y2j feud be worthwhile is to get jericho a feared figure anymore. Although he hasn't won a big match since No Way Out, jericho still gets some of the largest heat.

 

well, overall the ross report was a typical report.

[Guest Shaved Bear]

Hollywood Hulk Hogan was originally advertised to make this trip, but a lower back injury would not allow him to make the extremely long flight to Australia.

 

yea...thats why

[Guest Just call me Dan]

Look at that Powerbomb from last night, back problem my ass.

[Guest bcu1979]

It appears HOSS love is back in full force. Bull Buchanan, Albert, Batista and fat Samoans all get praised. What the hell does Albert being a starter on his college football team have to do with his entertainment value as a wrestler?

 

I find it humorous that J.R. takes shots at overweight wrestlers when he's praising Albert and the Island Boys in the same report.

 

RVD and Jericho do have great chemistry for a long term feud. But only if they're feuding over the WWE title or having a Rock/Triple Hesque superstar creating feud. Otherwise, a long term feud between the two is essentially nothing more than two guys running in place while Taker and Triple H hog the top spots on RAW.

[Guest bps "The Truth" 21]

If they do have a Jericho vs. RVD feud Jericho will win it.

 

ANd it won't hurt RVD at all...

 

so I'm all for it...I'd rather have RVD getting beat by Jericho in great matches than have HHH or someone like him beating RVD just because.

[Guest Ram]

It was great seeing Kane this week, and he looks to be very well-rested and in great shape following his bicep injury. The young monster’s return is much-anticipated, but the question is, will he be appearing on Raw or SmackDown!?

 

Bull is a high-character talent who has certainly paid his “dues” and deserves a chance to hunt with the big dogs.

 

I would love to see a best-of-seven series between RVD and Y2J. They have great chemistry from where I sit.

 

I’m as anxious as any fan to see what Shawn Michaels has left in his tank for his scheduled “fight” with Triple H at SummerSlam. I do not think anyone will be disappointed. Great in-ring performers tell a story with their physical actions and the emotions they create by what we see, and HBK and Triple H are two of the best ring technicians in recent memory.

 

If villains want to be jeered, then why do they break the majority of the rules directly in front of the referee? The antagonist masters that stand out in my mind were the rugged sons of guns who were expert in rulebreaking that was more often than not concealed from the referee. Defiance or cheating in front of the official is a great way to be “cool” or cheered in today’s marketplace, unless I’m having another “senior moment.”

 

 

I’m not overly enamored with the names Jamal and Rosie, but I’m anxious to see the two big newcomers in a tag match on Raw.

 

Batista seems to be making some progress, especially when it comes to being more physical and aggressive. At 6-5 and 300 pounds, he will never be a “finesse guy.” Neither will Albert, who seems to have also stepped up some in the physicality department. Albert, a three-year starter on the O-line at Pitt, is an amazing athlete at 6-7 and 340 pounds who needs to let his mean streak flow.

 

Chris Benoit still feels he is a step away from being totally back from his nearly one-year absence from the ring following neck surgery. That’s hard for me to judge because I think Chris is already back being as good as anyone on our roster. More RVD-Benoit action someday will not hurt my feelings.

 

If Kurt Angle continues to improve as we see every week, some day we may be saying, “there is Angle and then the rest of the talent.” World-class, gold medal-winning athletes who learn to entertain are a rarity.

 

I would think some talents with weight issues would be more inclined to personally address those issues but, unfortunately, that does not seem to be the case. This is not my “cryptic message of the week,” but a direct statement to those that are too heavy. More than one talent should use some self-discipline and get into “game shape”. These matters have been thoroughly addressed. Again.

 

And I’m not talking about Rey Mysterio, who continues to amaze.

1. I'm actually looking forward to seeing Kane back in action. Hopefully the injury won't effect his ability to be a entertaining hoss on his good days.

 

2. Bull has paid his "dues"? Undertaker is rolling around in his casket. I wonder if he still sleeps in it?

 

3. Me too J.R.. Me too.

 

4. At their peak, they were great performers. I wonder how they'll keep up. I know HHH has slowed down and works more carefully, and I know Shawn will be scared of reinjuring himself. So, what's to leave? I think they can do a good match, but not a wrestling one. And it appears its going towards a "fight", which is a good idea.

 

5. ? Where'd that come from? Eddy and Benoit still use this concealment when they can, but its kind of hard since managers barely exist, and stables are very few.

 

6. Yep. They can't hurt the tag division, at least.

 

7. You're crazy. Batista hasn't done anything beyond 3 minutes. And Albert, well, Albert sucks. He's a bald, ugly Test.

 

8. Do you just not have any say in anything anymore? I mean, you shill the hosses, and they somehow get pushes every week as a face or heel, depending on the position of the moon. Don't talk, do.

 

9. We already say "There's Benoit, Eddy, and Angle and then the rest of the talent." At least, its usually the general opinion.

 

10. Big Show and who else? Henry? They should take the Bisch diet.

 

11. Kind of weird, but JR's REALLY shilling the Smackdown! roster, and barely mentions anyone of RAW.

[Guest Zero_Cool]

Odd how he actually took time to compliment Guerrero and Benoit, who right now, are the best tag team in WWE. That's just my opinion, of course.

 

Yeah, seriously, why should we give a damn if Albert played college football. Why doesn't he pimp Jericho out for being an apparently outstanding Junior hockey player back in the day?

[Guest Brian]

They're also the best two wrestlers. Well, maybe Benoit's not quite at Angle yet, there's still a little rust.

[Guest Flyboy]

Speaking of which, did anyone else besides me the cool little mixed intro they got last night?

 

It started with Eddie's Latino Heat, followed by Benoit's 'Whatever'... I thought that was cool.

[Guest Mattdotcom]

That and Benoit's Titan Tron on the left and Eddie's on the right had me marking out.

[Guest Downhome]

...and HBK and Triple H are two of the best ring technicians in recent memory.

 

Ok, so he's joking, right?

 

William Regal is teaching Harvard’s Chris Nowinski some valuable in-ring techniques.

 

Anyone got a problem with that one? I know I sure don't, as I'm sure Chris can learn a lot from Regal!

[Guest Retro Rob]

Is there a reason JR specifically wanted to have a drink with Gordon Solie this week? Am I just missing something blatantly obvious?

[Guest nWoScorpion]

Maybe its the anniversary of his death.

[Guest Spaceman Spiff]

If Kurt Angle continues to improve as we see every week, some day we may be saying, ?there is Angle and then the rest of the talent.? World-class, gold medal-winning athletes who learn to entertain are a rarity

WTF? Aren't we saying that the majority of the time anyway? He's already the best all-around worker on the roster.

[Guest cynicalprofit]

Someone suggested to me that our own broadcasting colleague, The Coach, would be a great “Carlton” if the “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” ever begins producing again. That might work, but for goodness sakes, keep the Kansas farmer away from the cows!

 

HOLY FUCKING SHIT, THEY READ WHAT I POSTED, THEY DO LISTEN GUYS! To bad they dont care.

 

I posted about the resemblance between carlton and Coach, man this makes my day so much less shitty. Hate to brag, but this does mean they do read us, atleast someone in stamford does.

[Guest Zero_Cool]

Maybe they do read us...since I doubt that WWE higher-ups used to watch Fresh Prince of Bel Air...I mean c'mon..their thinking seems to still be stuck in the 80s.

[Guest Brian]

"WTF? Aren't we saying that the majority of the time anyway? He's already the best all-around worker on the roster."

 

After Benoit, Guerrero, and Mysterio.

[Guest Retro Rob]

Wasn't Fresh Prince on in the 90's?

[Guest Spaceman Spiff]

"WTF? Aren't we saying that the majority of the time anyway? He's already the best all-around worker on the roster."

 

After Benoit, Guerrero, and Mysterio.

That's why I said "all-around".

 

Angle is better on the mic than Benoit & Misterio.

 

You could argue Eddie, though.

[Guest Brian]

Oh yeah, all-around entertainers. I thought you meant wrestlers.

 

I still think Eddie's as good on the mic, especially without the accent.

[Guest mach7]

Bull is a high-character talent who has certainly paid his “dues” and deserves a chance to hunt with the big dogs.

 

What the fuck is a "high-character talent" ???

 

Someone suggested to me that our own broadcasting colleague, The Coach, would be a great “Carlton”

 

Yeah JR, way to keep up with last year's jokes...

 

I’m thinking Anna Nicole Smith and TE3’s John “Big” Gaburick would make a cozy couple. Eating out would be an adventure.

 

He's one to talk.......

 

Albert, a three-year starter on the O-line at Pitt

 

Yes JR, he played foodball. NO ONE GIVES A SHIT!!!!

 

I would think some talents with weight issues would be more inclined to personally address those issues but, unfortunately, that does not seem to be the case.

 

So what's their answer? They push fat-asses like Rikishi & Mark Henry, "Rosie" & "Jamal"... give me a fucking break. If you don't want these "guys that are too heavy" then TAKE THEM THE FUCK OFF TV [and send them to a fucking clinic]!

 

JR (Boomer Sooner!)

 

I hate JR. I really do.

[Guest mach7]

Speaking of which, did anyone else besides me the cool little mixed intro they got last night?

 

It started with Eddie's Latino Heat, followed by Benoit's 'Whatever'... I thought that was cool.

Very much so. BUT they need to change Benoit's music so it starts with the same guitar riffs but then goes into the chorus of the song... the actual beginning of the song is too droning and you can barely hear the lyrics.