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LIQUORED UP SUMMERSLAM WORKRATE REPORT!


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Guest DEAN RASMUSSEN
Posted

I went with [mul]DOOMSTONE to the Mulligans Sportsbar because SatanPro was late. I had two pitchers of Mobjack Pale Ale and thus God knows that I`m tired and drunk so this won`t be too in-depth. Lemme just say this was prolly the best WWF PPV I`ve ever seen.

 

WHAT WORK-

 

- Angle is just BEYOND our Olympic Jesus. He was fucking FABULOUS in this match. Rey Rey was fine but Angle made it work. His no-hands Jerry bump was fucking beautiful.

 

- Edge vs Eddy was fucking great. Edge sells his shoulder like RVD couldn`t even come close to selling and Eddy is motherfucking awesome laying in the ass-kick. The Eddy Toprope Shoulder breaker and the FUCKING BALLS TO THE WALL FROG SPLASH TO THE SHOULDER was my own personal Jesus. It doesn`t help Eddy at all, but great match.

 

- Brock Lesnar and the Rock were motherfucking AWESOME. The finish was fucking great. The build to the finish was motherfucking great. The bumping by Lesnar was motherfucking great.

 

WHAT DIDN`T WORK-

 

- Why is Jericho putting over Flair? Flair was fired up and his chops were the best parts of the match but I wasn`t feeling it.

 

- The RVD vs Benoit match was perfectly fine because Benoit carried the useless RVD like Benoit will do. RVD lack of ability to sell in the least ruins this match. Fuck, Road Warrior Hawk sold a shoulder better than THAT shit. P-U.

 

- The finish to the UnAmericans vs Booker T/ Goldust made it suck dick. The fact Goldust and Booker T represented the table I was sitting with- a fat gay man, a regular gay man disguised as a normal man, and a fat gay man- makes me think that I should love it. But I didn`t, even though Lance wasn`t annoying and Goldust was king-sized. The double legdrop was SOOOOO contrived. The Test run-in with the lame Big Boot was fucking horrendous.

 

- A Texas Death Match and Shawn Micheals uses a BLOOD CAPSULE. U CAN SUCK MY DICK!!!!!! HHH was GOD-like in the match though. SUCK MY DICK! Blade like a man, pussy-assed motherfucker.

 

- Girls did stuff to Harvy Finkleman to kill time before the main event. Yes.

 

THERE YA GO.

 

DEAN RASMUSSEN.

Guest Smell the ratings!!!
Posted

I just found this!

 

How dare you ingrates not respond to Dean!

 

it's ok Dean, I think you did a very good job.

Guest Ozymandias
Posted

Probably because anyone who considers RVD "useless" is too big a clown to be payed attention to....

Guest DEAN RASMUSSEN
Posted
I just found this!

 

How dare you ingrates not respond to Dean!

 

it's ok Dean, I think you did a very good job.

Why, thank you. It was a great PPV.

 

 

And RVD is a useless piece of shit of a wrestler.

 

Shakes The Rasmussen.

Posted

RVD seems to mesh well with WWE main event style wrestling but even the smaller changes in style seem to make it much harder on him.

Guest Incandenza
Posted
And RVD is a useless piece of shit of a wrestler.

Yes. Yes he is.

Guest BionicRedneck
Posted

Well, if RVD is useless because of shitty selling, then how is Edge's match "fucking great"?

Guest Incandenza
Posted

Edge forgets to sell once in the course of eleven minutes; RVD doesn't even bother selling over the course of 16 minutes. Do the math.

 

For the record, I liked Benoit/RVD more, but Van Dam was no help.

Guest BionicRedneck
Posted

Agreed, but Edge's one no-sell made the previous 11 minutes pointless.

 

If only he had speared him with his right arm... :angry:

Guest Incandenza
Posted

Yeah, the Edge/Guerrero ending cheesed me off, too, but Rob Van Dam's preventing the IC title match from being the classic it could've been pissed me off a helluva a lot more.

Guest RickyChosyu
Posted

RVD becomes useless the second he has to work a match where he has to sell is what I think Dean ment.

 

He fucked the match up big time.

 

And I'm with Dean; Goldust is indeed king-sized compaired to Storm these days. Goldy isn't God or anything, but he's one of the most watchable guys on Raw right now and he doesn't actively annoy me in any way, basically because he never over-reaches and just does what works. He's a good foil for Booker, and he's better than Stevie Ray. What else do you need?

 

Plus, Storm has sucked the meat missile a ton lately. Man, when Test is out-shining you, you know you have to kick it into gear big time. Both the Thrillseakers have lost their appeal, it seems.

Guest RavishingRickRudo
Posted

Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa...

 

Let's not diss Stevie Ray now... If there is ONE THING that can make Booker/Dust better it's the Straight Shooter.

Guest BionicRedneck
Posted

Test "out-shining" Storm? did you see Test at SummerSlam?

Guest Kotzenjunge
Posted

Stevie Ray: Talent Vacuum for Hire!

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

Guest Mulatto Heat
Posted
And RVD is a useless piece of shit of a wrestler.

Yes. Yes he is.

I'm surprised the RVD fanboys haven't been all up in your face over those comments. Very surprised. I guess they know how to pick and choose their fights.

 

Keep in mind this is from someone who likes RVD.

Guest RavishingRickRudo
Posted

HEY! Stevie Ray MADE Elix Skipper into the 'Prime Time! Prime Time! Prime Time! Prime Time! Hizzhaase! Hizzhaase! Hizzhaase! Hizzhaase! Prime Time! Prime Time! Prime Time! Prime Time!" Talent that he was. Sure there was the slight possibility of a homoerotic attraction he had to the team canada member, but hey, who hasn't fallen in love with a faux-former-canadian-national-football-grey-cup-winner?

 

Stevie Ray + Referee Scott James = Odd-couple of 2000/2001

 

(Please let there be WCW-faithful on this board... Pleeeaaase)

Guest Ozymandias
Posted

*shrugs*

 

Unless he was saying "Fruit Booty" I never cared....

Guest RavishingRickRudo
Posted

*GASP*

 

COME ON! Stevie Ray was priceless.

 

SR: "Tonay, wut wuz dat move!"

TS: "That was a death valley driver, stevie"

MT: "It's the DVD!"

SR: "I'm sorry Mike, but I was askin Tonay.."

 

You can't spell G-O-L-D, without S-T-E-V-I-E- -R-A-Y.

Guest Ozymandias
Posted

Heh, that IS pretty hysterical actually.

 

By the time I finally started watching WCW again (Nov/Dec 2000) I think he wasn't commentating much anymore.

Guest RickyChosyu
Posted
Test "out-shining" Storm? did you see Test at SummerSlam?

 

Actually, no, to be quite honest. Most of us left the room and played Halo when that match came on. I was over-exagerating, but frankly, Test has looked better in some of the tags they've been involved in, which, handicapped booking or not, is really, really sad.

 

Dude, Stevie was da bomb on commentary! "Tony, Tony, suckaz gotz ta know, what iz dat move cawlled? I have neva seen dat' move befo'!!"

 

You know, between Dusty, Bischoff, Tony, Mongo, Tennay, the ICP, Konnan, Madden, and Stevie, WCW may have had the most ridiculous comentary history in all of wrestling.

Guest BionicRedneck
Posted

The best Stevie Ray line was when there was a lumberjack match on Nitro and he said (something like):

 

"Tony, we got the who's who of professional wrestling coming down here! erm...the Harris Boys, the Canadians..."

Guest RickyChosyu
Posted

Oh man, Stevie got so ahead of himself and excited over a blatantly bad product that you couldn't help but love the guy.

Guest DEAN RASMUSSEN
Posted
RVD becomes useless the second he has to work a match where he has to sell is what I think Dean ment.

 

He fucked the match up big time.

DR: Yeah, hopefully they will keep him on RAW and keep putting him through tables. That's what Heyman did with him ECW and it worked. I actually would much rather have Undertaker on Smackdown than RVD as it looks like one or the other is going over to the show I watch. And I hate the Undertaker. But he is a better wrestler than RVD. Yes. Yes, he is.

 

DEAN.

Guest DEAN RASMUSSEN
Posted
And RVD is a useless piece of shit of a wrestler.

Yes. Yes he is.

I'm surprised the RVD fanboys haven't been all up in your face over those comments. Very surprised. I guess they know how to pick and choose their fights.

 

Keep in mind this is from someone who likes RVD.

Rob Van Dam is a perfectly fine NORML spokesman and interpretive dancer. I'm sure he is a faithful husband and all-around great guy to get high with. As a professional wrestler, he is Lex Luger with a frog splash. Hell, Luger wouldn't have sold a fucking Crippler Crossface like a chinlock TWICE in one match. Even LEX LUGER wouldn't be THAT clueless. If I have to choose between Undertaker and RVD, I'm glad Smackdown got Undertaker.

 

DEAN.

Guest Ozymandias
Posted

You won't be after you see his first match there..... :ph34r:

Guest BionicRedneck
Posted

Whatever RVDs shortcomings are, he is still more entertaining than Taker (who also doesn't sell shit)

Guest humongous2002
Posted

No wonder WWE doesn't listen to Smarks, because they can't make up their mind.

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