Guest Korgath Report post Posted November 14, 2003 Judge: “Holy shit, and we’re back with SJL Crimson!” Annie: “Come on, Bill, this is Mexico! Excrement has nothing to do with the Catholic faith.” Ejiro: “Whatever, Annie!” Judge: “What a great show we have for you tonight! We’ve got tons and tons of pies just waiting for four of our workers to use in what must be the craziest hardcore match in SJL history.” Ejiro: “Well, there was that Calvin…” Annie: “Don’t say it! It’s a cursed word, I tell you!” Judge: “ANYWAY. We’ve got a returning Todd Royal looking to win back his lost World Title! But first, he has to face another former World Champion, Insane Luchador!” Ejiro: “Well, I’ll tell you about someone else who’s returning, Bloodshed!” Annie: “Who?” Judge: “You know, the Apostle!” Annie: “Who?” Before the tag team of Justice and Rule can continue, a booming voice suddenly resounds over the PA system. “Please Stand Clear of the Ring. Por favor Soporte Claro Del Anillo.” Ejiro: “What the…” “For the safety and comfort of others...no smoking please. Para la seguridad y la comodidad de otras... el ningún fumar por favor” Judge: “You gotta be kidding!” "The SJL and the Walt Disney Company are proud to present...the following matchup." Annie: “I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore, Toto!” Up on the gigantic SmarkTron... Disney’s trademarked fairy Tinkerbell flies down from the sky and hovers down into the Mexican arena. Her little body zooms lithely over the crowd and towards the entranceway. And from this same entranceway, the curtain parts and out walks Alan Clark! Clark puts on a wide smile as he awaits his first in-ring match since his leave of absence after the Genesis IV tournament. The Mexican audience goes crazy and roots shamelessly for their commercialized hero as he walks down the aisle and sends greetings and well-wishes to all. Funyon: “Ladies And Gentlemen... hailing from Disneyland, USA... he is the Happiest Guy On Earth.... ALANNNNNNNNNN CLARRKKKKKKKKKK!" Annie: “Who, him?” Justice and Rule: “Errr.. yeah, that guy!” Alan Clark steps into the ring to a rousing ovation as he shakes hands enthusiastically with the official, referee Matthew Kivell. Ejiro: “He claims his head trauma is a thing of the past, but I don’t trust this Looney Toon any further than I can throw him.” Judge: “And that’s pretty far!” Ejiro: “Exactly.” Annie: “What’s with the change of heart, guys? When he came out on Wrath he even got you singing “It’s a Small World” along with him!” Ejiro: “You know what, Annie? I went back and I thought about it and myself and Bill, we realized one thing…” Justice and Rule: “WE HATE THAT SONG!” Suddenly, the lights in the arena dim and a decidedly gloomy mood descends upon the crowd. The speakers blast off as the opening lines of Grave Digger's "Demon's Day" hits! "You sit alone in lightless chambers, all the love you had is gone No one there to catch your fall, you never felt so alone Blackened thoughts in lonely ruins, lifeless eyes an empty gaze Death is but a promise now, life is just an empty phrase!" The crowd begins to shout angrily as the massive form of Dominic Korgath emerges from behind the curtain. Without fail, the audience rant and rave, as the Big Demon simply stands motionless at the top of the ramp. With a mighty yell, the massive man raises his iron staff high above his head in a sign of defiance as he starts making his way down to the ring. Funyon: “And his opponent, weighing in at 350 lbs, from the Plains of Azeroth, he is DOMINNNIIIICCCCCC KORRRRRGGGGAAAAATTTHHH!” The big man climbs over the top rope as he gets into the ring and warily scouts his opponent. Alan Clark makes no move to aggravate the giant and the two men simply circle warily around the ring. *DING DING DING* As Matthew Kivell calls for the bell, a spark seems to light in the mind of Dominic Korgath and he barrels forward, straight into his opponent, as he lashes away with a series of stiff chops. Each blow resounds like a thunderclap throughout the stadium and Alan Clark’s chest suffers with each additional slap. The crowd roars its hate for the show of power from the Big Demon, but no amount of audience reaction will slow the Big Demon down. Clark retreats under the strength of the blows but reaches a dead end once he gets to the ropes. Before the “Happiest Guy on Earth” can reach for one of the corner turnbuckles, however, Korgath grabs the waistband of Clark’s shorts. Lifting the 225 lbs man as if he was no more than an insignificant insect on the asscrack of the Disney empire, Korgath sends Alan Clark flying straight to the mat with a HUGE body drop. The force of the fall literally sends Alan Clark bouncing back up, the physics of the cartoon universe obviously playing some role or another in this match. Korgath is more than happy to resume pummeling the poor fool. With as much speed as the Big Demon can muster, he jabs Clark with several rights and even more lefts and it isn’t long before Alan Clark returns back to the canvas. Ejiro: “Now that’s what I call rolling out the welcome mat for a returning talent!” Korgath sets his huge frame upon the Disney employee for the lateral press, as Matthew Kivell drops for the count. ONE!!! TWO!!!! Ejiro: “And it’s ALL OVER!” NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Kickout by Alan Clark as the Big Demon’s shock is hardly unexpected. Dominic Korgath grips the collar of his opponent and with a strong, swift tug, gets the limp form of Alan Clark in a headlock position. The Big Demon adjusts his oni mask for extra effect, before slapping the back of Clark and dropping to the mat with an AUTHORITATIVE DDT! This time, at least, Alan Clark stays down and does not get up. Korgath plants two right feet into the chest of the “Happiest Guy on Earth”, who for some inexplicable reason is unable to maintain his smile. Please, no HBK jokes. Korgath hits the mat and gets some elbow pad into the face of Alan Clark in an unsuccessful attempt to rid the Disney executive of his facial features. Alan Clark somehow manages to power out and roll out of the ring, narrowly escaping a fate worse than watching The Three Caballeros, well, three times. But the respite is only temporary, as Korgath reaches past the ropes and hauls the flailing Disney man back into the ring, straight into a standing spinebuster which knocks the air right out of Clark’s body, not to mention the pain it must bring to the backbone of the poor guy. But Dominic Korgath is persistent and masochistic, dragging Clark back to his feet and slamming him back down to the canvas with a smoothly executed side suplex. Clark is all but stunned now and can only groan as the audience boos the triumphant Korgath. Not wasting any time, the Big Demon clambers up to the fallen body of Clark and grabs the leg for the pinfall. ONE!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Judge: “This is amazing! Clark’s taken one helluva beating at the hands of the Big Demon and he’s still able to lift that shoulder off the mat!” Korgath grumbles his disappointment at the referee, but Matthew Kivell simply puts up two fingers to imply that his decision was final. Desperate to make the best of a failed pinfall attempt, Korgath climbs up to the top rope, precariously perched high above the rest, he takes a leap of faith, hoping to crush Alan Clark with a huge legdrop. The 350 lbs man lands, but not on Clark! Ejiro: “Holy shit, Alan Clark managed to roll out of the way before being turned into pancake!” Dominic Korgath lays there clutching his sides, which for some reason, did not split from the impact, and lays motionless for a substantial amount of time. Alan Clark, now realizing that he has the apparent advantage and looking forward to maintaining it, locks Dominic Korgath in a standing surfboard! The giant grunts in pain as he tries to power out of it, but Alan Clark is riding on sheer adrenalin here. “SALUDOS AMIGOS!” This rousing shout of strength in friendship emits from the mouth of the Disney employee, resulting in a huge response from the Mexican crowd. Ejiro: “Clark calls this the MEXICO surfboard, named after the Epcot World Showcase Pavilion!” Judge: “You actually know what this move is called?” Ejiro: “I really could care less, but it says so right here in this contract, clause number 57: mention the Epcot World Showcase Pavilion at least three times in the match, otherwise Disney says NO DEAL!” Annie: “You mean the one with the Aztec temple, modeled after a real temple at Teotihuacan, that Epcot World Showcase Pavilion?” Justice and Rule: “Exactly.” Annie: “The lengths we go to earn our dues.” Back to the action, and Korgath has barely managed to power out of the surfboard! The Big Demon gets to his feet, but Alan Clark is faster. The lithe man runs up to the second role, twists as he comes down and nails Korgath on the back with a powerful axe handle. Dropping to his feet, the big man seems overcome by his inability to get the better of Clark. The Disney man waits for the right opportunity, before clocking Korgath with a swift kick… but it is caught by the massive hands of the big man! Unfazed, Alan Clark whips out his other leg, and catches Dominic Korgath on the jaw! Judge: “And the big man goes down even as Alan Clark’s enziguiri turns the tide of this match.” Clark goes for the pinfall! Referee Matthew Kivell checks that both shoulders are down before starting the count! ONE!!!!!!!!!! TWOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ejiro: “This is it! Alan Clark’s won on his first match back!” THREEEEENNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Dominic Korgath manages to power out of the pinfall attempt and sends Alan Clark hurtling a good distance away. The two men lay on the canvas, motionless, even as the referee begins the count out. ONE! TWO! THREE! And still neither man moves a muscle. FOUR! FIVE! SIX! Aha, the Big Demon begins to stir, but he’s not on his feet yet. SEVEN! EIGHT! Suddenly Alan Clark kips up! Acknowledging the generous applause of the audience for a while, Clark, runs towards the ropes and charges the Big Demon, right into the open hand of Dominic Korgath! Alan Clark starts to struggle, even as the blood flow to his brain is being cut. The Big Demon continues to maintain the grip on his opponent, before effortlessly lifting up Clark and slamming the Disney employee down to the mat! Annie: “Chokeslam by the Big Demon and that’s all she wrote!” Ejiro: “All who wrote? Cindy Marcus? Because all she can write is really boring Disney sequels!” Judge: “Eji… stuff it.” Dominic Korgath goes for the pin, but Matthew Kivell says that Alan Clark is too close to the ropes for the pinfall to be legal! Not too happy with the way Kivell is playing by the book, Korgath drags the body of Clark across the mat to the middle of the ring, before sarcastically checking if this would be better for the official. Reluctantly, the referee begins the count for the pinfall! ONE!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Alan Clark manages to kick out again! Korgath gets into the face of the referee as he suggests that it was the referee’s ineptitude that gave Clark enough time to kick out. Meanwhile, Clark slowly gets to his feet and, realizing that Korgath’s back is still turned towards him, grabs the giant and in a swift motion, brings the big man down with an efficient Russian legsweep! The “Happiest Guy on Earth” then climbs to the top of the turnbuckle, even as the toil of the extended battle begins to wear upon him. Clark waits for Korgath to get to his feet, before leaping off the top rope with a springboard DDT against the big man! Judge: “I’ll say one thing, Clark’s array of skills have improved much since we last saw him in the Genesis IV tournament.” Ejiro: “Have YOU got your Genesis DVD yet?” Alan Clark gets to his feet once more and, deciding that it is worth the risk, leaps to the air from the mat and slams his body against the fallen Korgath with a smoothly executed standing moonsault! Clark goes for another pin! Annie: “Has he weakened Korgath long enough? ONE!!!!! Ejiro: “We shall soon see.” TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Korgath barely manages to push Clark off his body before Kivell can hit the third and final slap on the mat. The Big Demon rolls around the ring before getting up and sees Alan Clark rushing towards him. Korgath instinctively stretches out his arm and almost beheads Clark with a brutal Clothesline from Hell! Korgath with the advantage now, and the big man grabs the left arm of Alan Clark and begins to wring it around. Clark’s face contorts in pain as he tries hard not to succumb to it. Clark hopes around, the agony of the move quickly entering his brain. In desperation, Clark twirls around and begins to pound the side of the big man’s head with his free elbow. Once! Twice! Three times before Korgath releases the hold on Clark’s arm. Still fired up, Alan Clark goes for his signature move and puts Korgath in a reverse DDT position before switching to a reverse neckbreaker! It’s the Cutting In Line move! “Don’t cut in line, kids! And don’t try this at home!” Ejiro: “Oh Todd, I don’t think I could take much more of this.” Alan Clark’s public service announcements are met with louds whoops of appreciation, even as he waves to the audience. Turning back to his fallen opponent, Clark grabs one leg, before attempting to lock in a Texas Cloverleaf onto Dominic Korgath! But wait! The Big Demon manages to reverse it by kicking Alan Clark into the corner turnbuckle WITH AUTHORITY! Clark bounces like a rag doll off the corner, dazed, and falls to the mat. Korgath roars a final victory yell before leaping into the air and crashing onto the subconscious Alan Clark. ONEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Judge: “End the misery now!” TWOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Annie: “I wanna see Megan Skye!” THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *DING DING DING* Funyon: “The winner of this match, via pinfall, DOMMMMINNNNNICCCCCCC KOOOORRRRGGGAAATHHH!” Judge: “Alan Clark put up a great return match, but nothing’s going to get in the way of the angry Dominic Korgath.” Ejiro: “Next up, we hope you like pie!” Annie: “When SJL Crimson, returns.” <fade to commercials> Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Amazing Rando 0 Report post Posted November 14, 2003 Ask LDP I guess, man... it's just that the way I percieved your stats is as a big man with tons of strength but that can take an average amount of really rough shots... in my match they are Various kicks possibly the Rana counter Springboard DDT Space Flying Tiger Drop the "Cutting In Line" the 450 I for one LOVE the research put into the Mexixo pavillion and the way you helped sell the back... I was really working toward selling my back hardcore in the match to set up the Krusher and the Rack... ...but in reality...if i hit that neckbreaker I would not turn my attention to the back with the Cloverleaf there...especially since during the match I spent very little time really working on the back... with the Surfboard and a few other various moves... if i was going for the submission from the 'Leaf I would have been driving my knee down there constantly and working the surfboards and the lionsault to the back...among other things ... to help get over the fact that it would take ALOT for that move to really hurt... ...and again...I *love* all the Disney research... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Korgath Report post Posted November 14, 2003 ...and again...I *love* all the Disney research... Thanks for the comments, Rando. The Disney thing was something I couldn't bear not to do. There's just SO much to say! Especially in Mexico! On hindsight, the ring psychology was rather flawed, I'll admit. Ah well. Better luck next time. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Amazing Rando 0 Report post Posted November 14, 2003 El Rio Del Tiempo is seriously the worst ride i've ever been on... it's like It's A Small World on an acid trip...which sounds appealing but is not... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
