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Bruce Blank

El Clusterf*ck 2008 DVD Extra Sin Nombre

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We see resident ditz / interviewer Emma Dumas waiting in the parking lot, eagerly looking around as she waits for the arrival her subject.

 

“You sure this is the place?” she asks her cameraman

 

“He’s driving in from the airport right? He’s booked tonight right?” a voice from off screen says

 

“Well yeah, but why would he come here? It’s dirty and filthy” Emma says and points to the parking lot.

 

“Because this is where he’d park his car?”

 

Emma doesn’t say anything, she just waits in silence passing the time by chewing gum and trying to file her nails at the same time but failing at it because two things at once is just too much for her. Then after a moment she spots a car coming

 

“Oh this MUST be him” she says with an excited giggle while jumping up and down, thus revealing why the SWF keeps her around.

 

A loooooooooooong black stretch Volvo Amazon pulls up next to Emma Dumas who bends over and tries to look through the darkened glass.

 

“Fans Emma Dumas standing by ready to get a word with the newest SWF wrestler and Clusterf*ck winner El Ho…”

 

Emma is cut off when the door opens and out steps the impeccably dressed Rikard Fleihr

 

“WØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØ” Fleihr lets lose with his trademark sound as he looks down Emma Dumas’ dress. “The Four Norsemen are here, the Spaced Mountain is ready for business”

 

Emma stands there, looking dumbfounded as Arne Andersen, Olaf Andersen and Tolland Blankhardt step out of the stretch Volvo behind the leader of the pack.

 

“I was expecting El Hombre Sin Nombre”

 

“Well honey you’re getting the kiss borrowing, lending, vending, Volvo riding, First class flying sonuvagun Rikard Fleihr!!” Rik replies, ignoring the fact that this isn’t actually his interview segment.

 

“And can I just add that Norway was robbed in the European Handball Cup?” Olaf says, sucking up to Rik.

 

“They should have come to the Four Norsemen for some tips!” Tolland says with a grin.

 

“Why? Do you guys have a lot of experience with hands on balls??” Emma asks cluelessly.

 

“Would you like some experience with that?” Fleihr replies, then takes off his gigantic 80ties style smoke coloured sunglasses and looks straight at the camera.

 

“What you have here is a colle…” Fleihr’s voice trails off as the camera turns and points at a rental car pulling up behind the Four Norsemen’s Volvo. “Hey, hey where are you going!” Fleihr yells as Dumas and the crew run over to the other car.

 

This time it’s the right car with the masked El Hombre Sin Nombre behind the wheel. The rookie steps out of the car staring at Emma Dumas as she pushes the camera guy out of the way to get into the shot.

 

“Hi Emma Dumas” she says

 

“Are you?” El Hombre asks, confused about the frank admission.

 

“She certainly is” someone in the production staff yells.

 

“Well okay then” El Hombre says not sure what to say next.

 

“I’m so pleased to meet you, I’m a big fan”

 

“Really? But I’ve only had one match” El Hombre says rather meekly, not used to a good old American slut, the Mexican sluts aren’t half as slutty as this (it’s an exchange rate thing, very technical.)

 

“Yes but what a match, I mean you in there rolling around, getting all sweaty with so many hot guys… “ Emma trails off for a second in her own private fantasy.

 

“I’m not going to lie to you, it felt great to win the match, I mean I still can’t believe I won it” El Hombre says meekly. “I can hardly remember winning it” he then adds with a chuckle.

 

“And now you’re getting a World title match at From the Fire, are you excited?”

 

“Oh yeah its…. Great” El Hombre says in a very unconvincing tone.

 

“I mean how many rookies win get a shot at the world title in their third match” Emma asks.

 

“How many rookies are ready for a shot in their third match?” El Hombre Sin Nombre replies.

 

“You?”

 

El Hombre doesn’t answer that, choosing to adjust his mask a bit to distract Emma

 

“Man I bet you’re soooooo hot under there” Emma blurts out.

 

“It’s actually not that warm, I wouldn’t mind a mask with eye holes and a mouth opening but I can’t wear any other mask than this until I earn it.” El Hombre says totally misunderstanding what Emma Dumas meant.

 

“If your performance at the Clusterf*ck is anything to judge by you’ll -” Emma starts only to be cut off by Olaf Andersen shooting off his mouth

 

“He’ll get his ass kicked the entire match and have someone else win for him”

 

The other Norsemen join in and laugh at Olaf’s joke.

 

“Que?” El Hombre says, a little annoyed by the four pale (really PALE) riders of the Nor-pocalypse.

 

“Is the mask blocking your ears little boy?” Olaf says as he and the Norsemen approach El Hombre. “I said you don’t deserve the title shot, your win was a fluke.”

 

“Fluke?” El Hombre’s English isn’t 100% so he may not understand the word but he understands the tone and intention.

 

“Yeah a joke, I mean a rookie who has to have a big Samoa help him win” Rik explains with a very condescending voice.

 

“I’m not a joke!” El Hombre replies angrily.

 

“Well lookie here the widdle Mexican’t is mad” Olaf says while wagging a finger in El Hombre’s face.

 

“At least I actually won”

 

The laughing stops, no one tells the Norsemen that they’re jobbers, even if it’s true.

 

“Watch it kid” Arne threatens.

 

“I’m not afra-OUFF~!” El Hombre’s defiance is cut off as Olaf knees the Luchador in the gut followed by the rest of the Norsemen jumping El Hombre Sin Nombre, laying into him with kicks and punches as El Hombre goes into a foetal position on the ground to try and cover up.

 

“Oh my god stop it!” Emma yells as the Norsemen pummel the helpless and outnumbered El Hombre.

 

“This is what happens when you get in the Norsemen’s way, it’s not our fault, we’re Viking Warriors and just can’t help ourselves!” Rik Fleihr says, taking a moment out of the beat down to comment and oogle Emma at the same time.

 

“Security!! SECURITY!!” Emma yells

 

The threat of the local rent-a-cops makes the Norsemen stop, nervously look around and then scramble off in all directions at the sight of an old man in a grey uniform.

 

“I’ll see you later kid!” Olaf Andersen yells as Emma Dumas signals for the cameraman to stop filming.

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niiice, I like this - it's great character development for a character designed to be unremarkable. Bueno. It reminds me that I have a promo to get up here soon...

 

 

Emma Dumas - is she one of the "anyone can use" talents? 'cause I could find a TON of uses for her in interviews :D

 

-Annie

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....Emma is cut off when the door opens and out steps the impeccably dressed Rikard Fleihr

 

“WØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØ” Fleihr lets lose with his trademark sound as he looks down Emma Dumas’ dress. “The Four Norsemen are here, the Spaced Mountain is ready for business”

 

Emma stands there, looking dumbfounded as Arne Andersen, Olaf Andersen and Tolland Blankhardt step out of the stretch Volvo behind the leader of the pack.

 

“I was expecting El Hombre Sin Nombre”

 

“Well honey you’re getting the kiss borrowing, lending, vending, Volvo riding, First class flying sonuvagun Rikard Fleihr!!” Rik replies, ignoring the fact that this isn’t actually his interview segment......

 

 

 

that part amused me to no end. especially the "WØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØ". classic.

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I love it. WØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØ, indeed.

 

 

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“WØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØ”

 

Awesome.

 

The rest of it's good as well, but that's awesome.

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