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It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.

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How To Vibrate
 

It's torture!

The torture horror genre is dead. Well almost dead. Thank God.   I liked "Hostel" and it's sequal, in spite of what others have said. I liked the first "Saw" movie. That out of the way, with "Hostel Part II" tanking (and director Eli Roth posting an incredibly whiney entry in his Myspace), and inspite of the movie "Captivity" coming out, people aren't largely going to see people get tortured anymore. Ok, so there's another "Saw" movie, but that's beyond the point.   I think that people are tired of being bombarded with torture flick after torture flick. Hell, Roth has even seemed to have moved beyond the tired subgenre he helped give birth to, and is going on to do an adaptation of Stephen King's "Cell" as his next movie. The director of "Saw" went on to do the dreadful "Dead Silence", which at least saw him try something different. The director of the excellent slasher flick "High Tension" and the remake of "The Hills Have Eyes" is moving on to more creepy supernatural scare. And "28 Weeks" later not only showed that R rated horror can still do good box office, but can still be scary. Several R Rated horror films have proven that you can be scary without endless torture sequences. The problem: They haven't done good box office.   In a way, because of movies like "Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning" and their ilk, R-Rated horror has gotten a bad buzz. Critics now use the tired phrase "torture porn" to describe such movies (really folks, torture porn is the kind of thing you find in Sweeden), and the movie going public has tired of torture. Unfortunately, this has spoiled things for other horror flicks, meaning that much better and more imaginative horror flicks either do poor box office ("Grindhouse", "The Abandoned", "Slither") get limited release ("Black Sheep", "Fido"), or get dumped straight to video ("Gravedancers", "Reincarnation", "Isolation")   People want to be scared again. They don't want to see Elisha Cuthbert get tortured by a deranged maniac. They don't want to see a woman get raped by a mutant. They want to be frightened, not put through an ordeal.   My answer to those who complain about movies that use torture: don't watch them, and they'll go away. Go see original horror movies that deserve respect and attention, like "The Descent" or "The Abandoned."   Horror isn't going to die, it's just at a crossroads. That's ok, because this always happens. The same thing happened with slasher movies in the 80's and self aware horror in the 90's. The next big thing will come eventually, and it will go, only to make way for the new one.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

Transformers movie, other things

-Happy 4th of...oh damnit, I'm late again. I was good though. I visited my family, saw fireworks, had ribs (wish I brought some home with me...) and that's about it.   Anyways, the "Transformers" movie was pretty good. Sure, it has it's flaws (the mom is really annoying, the use of Linkin Park music), but it's still a lot of fun. Great action, good acting, most of the jokes are hits, great special effects-it's all you want out of a blockbuster. Just turn your mind off, and don't go into it thinking "Oh, it's not the same as G1!"   -I saw a poster for the "Alvin and the Chipmunks" movie, and well, to David Cross: You are a funny man, but with this,"Scary Movie 2", and "Freakshow" (which you served as producer), I'm starting to think you need a new agent, or at least to think about the movie choices you make.   -Also, "Ratatoullie" is awesome. Next to "Grindhouse", it may be my favorite movie of the year so far.   -Borders is better than Barnes & Noble. How do I know this? Well, I go to a lot of bookstores (I read a lot) so I would know by experience.    
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

gary floyd rates the new TV shows

ABC   -Pushing Daisies-Best new show of the season. It's funny, has likeable characters (and hot chicks), great visuals, an intersting plot, and more. Great stuff. A   -Dirty Sexy Money-Not too wild about what I saw. Not even Donald Sutherland can save it. D   -Cavemen-No. F   -Carpoolers-Not even the presence of Kids in the Hall member Bruce McCulloch as a writer can make this good. Cliched and disappointing, as it could have been great. C-   -Big Shots-Sucks. I miss the shoe "Titus." F   NBC   -Chuck-The geek gimmick can occasionally get annoying, but it's still good stuff. B   -Journeyman-I really have wanted to like the show, and while Kevin McKidd is great, I have yet to be really involved. C+   -Bionic Woman-I really wanted to like this one also, but so far, it's just so-so. C   -Life-Good, but not great. It's fun, but formulaic. B-   Fox   -K-Ville-Also fun but formulaic. The thing that makes it is the cast, particularly Anthony Anderson. B-   -Back To You-Boring, with the exception of Fred Willard. D+   CBS   -The Big Bang Theory-From the producers of "2 1/2 Men." So yeah, it's not good. D-   -Cane-Interesting, and well acted, but a bit of a let down. C+   -Moonlight-Vampires as PI's? No thanks. F   -Viva Laughlin!-This is...well, it's something. It's a horrible show, but it's like a bad acid trip kind of horrible, as it's something you saw, hallucinated (well, it feels like it) and wish you never did see. F   The CW   -Aliens in America-Not too bad. The leads have great chemistry, and Adhir Kalayan could be the season's breakout star. Plus, it's got the kid from "The Hills Have Eyes" remake. B   -Reaper-The second best show of the season. Ray Wise gives the season's best performance as Satan. A   -Gossip Girl-Haven't seen it.   -Life is Wild-Ditto.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

2007 Horror review

Best Horror Movie: Grindhouse. Honerable mention goes to Zodiac and Bug (which are only sort of horror), 28 Weeks Later, The Mist, 30 Days of Night, and The Host.   Worst Horror Movie: TIE Captivity and Skinwalkers. Honerable mention goes to Unearthed, Hills Have Eyes II, The Hitcher remake, Rise, Blood Hunter, and Hannibal Rising.   Goriest: TIE Planet Terror and Hatchet   Funniest: All the trailers to Grindhouse, especially Werewolf Women of the SS. Honerable mention goes to Severence.   Most Disappointing: Rob Zombie's Halloween. Honerable mention goes to The Last Winter and the adaptation of Jack Ketchum's The Girl Next Door.   Best Sequal: 28 Weeks Later   Most Cringe Inducuing Moment: Melting balls in Planet Terror. Honerable mention goes to the Belt Sander scene in Hatchet and the castration scene in Hostel II.   Best Cameo: TIE Nicolas Cage in Werewolf Women of the SS and Ruggero Deodtro in Hostel II.   Best Kill Mouth and skull torn apart in Hatchet.   Best Actor: TIE Robert Downey jr., Mark Ruffolo and Jake Gyllanhall in Zodiac. Honerable mention goes to Thomas Jane in The Mist, Kurt Russell in Death Proof, Robert Carlyle in 28 Weeks Later, Danny Huston in 30 Days of Night, Nathan Baesal in Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon, Malcolm McDowell in Rob Zombie's Halloween, and Brian Cox in Zodiac.   Best Villain: Marcia Gay Harden in The Mist. Honerable mention goes to Danny Huston in 30 Days of Night, Kurt Russell in Death Proof, and the monster in The Host.   Best Actress Ashley Judd in Bug. Honerable mention goes to Rose McGowan in Planet Terror and Marcia Gay Harden in The Mist.   Best Indie and/or Foreign Movie: The Host. Honerable mention goes to Severence, Mullberry Street, Behind The Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon, Hatchet, and The Living and the Dead.   Finally on DVD: From Beyond, Night of the Comet, and Monster Squad.   Look Forward to in 2008: George A. Romero's Diary of the Dead, Dario Argento's The Mother of Tears, Stuart Gordon's Stuck, Cloverfield, Frontier(s), The Lost, Red, HeadER (not a typo btw), The Signal, Inside, and Hellboy II.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

WWE Folder

-The WWE folder sucks right now. There's no way around it, and something needs to be done. There are too many people who treat wrestling too seriously, and the folder needs less of them and more people who have watched for a while and have knowledge, but don't make it their life. We need more posters like Venkman, Lushus, alkeiper, Chriswok, Scroby and their ilk and less Mecca, Enigma, Carlito Brigante and their ilk. The latter are why I tend to avoid the folder now. Whenever I watch Raw these days, I avoid the folder and go on the chat.   Look, I still watch the WWE, but there are valid reasons why cheech made a "Reasons why the WWE folder sucks" thread.   Also, I like Czech, and it's fine he doesn't like to watch wrestling, but there is no way in hell the wrestling folders will become secondary. This place started as a part of a wrestling website, and while this message board isn't really a wrestling message board anymore, the wrestling folders, no matter what you think, are still a vital part of this board. It's just that things need to change in one of the folders.  
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

Nevermind

Yeah, I should have voted for Cena's Writer.   Matt, it's a fucking tournament made for fun on a message board. It's not "Serious Business." I doubt I'll make it to round three, and you don't see me crying about it.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

When I was in 12th Grade...

...I thought Bill Hicks was the funniest man who ever lived.   I listen to him now, and I don't think "Bill Hicks sure is funny!" I instead think "Wow, that stoner sure sounds angry." In short, the magic has kinda disappeared.   Also, there seems to be a strange phenomenon with douchebags quoting Bill Hicks.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

Underrated Album(s): Alice in Chains-Sap

Usually, when it comes to Alice in Chains' best album, people are usually split between Dirt and Jar of Flies. I know Black Lushus's favorite is Dirt, while I'm more of a fan of the Hard Rock/Acoustic Folk sound of Jar of Flies. However, this isn't about their best album, this is about their most underrated. For that, I choose the EP Sap.

Done after Facelift and before Dirt, Sap is a bit of a stop gap, and a major shift in tone after the sludge of Facelift. It sees the band exploring their acoustic ballad that doesn't suck/folk side that would be improved on Jar of Flies. However, it's still a good EP, save for the last track, the out of place (and annoying) comedy song "Love Song."

Opening track "Brother" features Cantrell on Vocals, with Ann Wilson from Heart offering backing vocals. The song is appropriately melancholy, with acoustic strumming and reflective lyrics taking hold. "Got Me Wrong" was the EP's single, as a video was made, and it was included on the soundtrack to "Clerks." It's a great duet between Layne and Jerry, that sounds almost upbeat, in spite of the cryptic lyrics, though the chorus presents some hope. "Right Turn" is a collaboration between the band and members of Soundgarden and Mudhoney. It's a little more light hearted than the previous songs ("But it's so hard/To penetrate pig thick skin"), and is the shortest song here. "Am I Inside" also features Ann Wilson, and is the eeriest track on the album, with mournful piano and acoustic guitar. There's a slight upbeat tempo change in the chorus, but the tone remains throughout.

As I said before, Jar of Flies improved the folk rock sound captured here. As it stands though, Sap is an unfortunately overlooked album in the band's career, and deserves more attention.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

Songs about Fucking

-Charlton Heston died. When I was a kid, he was one of my favorite actors. "A Touch of Evil" is one of my all time favorite movies, and has a hell of a soundtrack. I could go on and on, but I won't. RIP Chuck.

-Taigastar got sent to the Gulag, then was let out. While I don't like her, she didn't deserve to be there. Deon, on the other hand...

-Scott Keith is supposed to be doing a Q & A here. I remember reading his old reviews, especially his review of "Royal Rumble 94." His review of Undertaker vs. Yokozuna is hilarious (complete with Depeche Mode reference!), and pretty dead on. Also, I remember Sean Shannon was pretty universally loathed, and seems to have diappeared off the face of the Earth. What happened to the doofus?

-Finally, I won't be doing music related entries here anymore. They'll instead go on my Last.FM blog.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

13 reasons why remaking "Friday the 13th" isn't the end of the world

If you're like me, you go to horror movie websites, and get the latest in news, reviews, interviews, etc. Even if you haven't, you've probably heard that Platinum Dunes is remaking it, and Michael Bay is producing it. Some, like luke-o and Jingus (known for being bitchy when it comes to movies) are opposed to it. Me? Well, it's not the best idea in the world, but it's not the worst either. Here are the 13 reasons why remaking Friday the 13th is not the worst idea in the history of mankind.   They've done all they can with the series-Come on, there's been a impostor Jason, Jason vs. a Psychic, Jason in Manhattan (for a short time), Jason in Space, Freddy vs. Jason-they've done everything but "Next Friday the 13th", in which Ice Cube must save the hood from Jason. Actually, that's a pretty good idea. Anyways, I think you see my point: they've done all they can do with the series. There is nowhere else to go with the series except a remake. New ways to kill people-Come on, you have to at least be curious to see what he has in store for campers this time. Many bad rip offs-Ok, there were a few good slashers to come out after Friday the 13th ("The Burning", "The Prowler", "Stage Fright", "Night Warning"), but there were also plenty of bad ones-in fact, there were more bad ones then good ones. Come on, you can't defend "Don't Go In the Woods...Alone", "Honeymoon Horror", "Silent Madness", "Final Exam", "The Prey", "The Final Terror", and several others, because they are horrible, and in some ways, have taken away some of what made the Friday the 13th series fun. Sometimes, nerds bitching on the Internet is funny-It's true ya know. It was going to happen anyway-They've already remade "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre", "The Haunting", "Halloween", and others, and more movies will be remade, so it was only matter of time really. The series needs a reboot-No, not the animated tv series. However, as I already said, the series has done all it can, and if a remake is the next step, then so be it. I need a new horror movie to see-Not the best reason but I have been watching a lot of older horror lately, and I need something different. The series was never really about originality-The series can be best described as "Horny teens get killed in gruesome but inventive ways." Hell, I already mentioned the various rip offs, so when you think about it, movies in general (particularly horror movies) aren't as original as we like to believe. Imagine the porno movie knock off-You just know they did a Friday the 13th porno knock off came out back in the day, so maybe we can get a remake of that knock off. The Asylum needs another "Mockbuster"-Ok, maybe not, but hey. Bitching on the Internet accomplishes nothing-It's true ya know. You can bitch and moan about this all you want, but it won't change things, so what's the point? Some are looking forward to it-Yes, some of us want to see what will happen. I wouldn't say that I'm looking forward to it, but I am curious. Who knows, maybe (I said maybe) it will be entertaining. Besides, it can't be worse than Parts 8 and 9. It's Friday the 13th-Nobody is expecting brilliant, Oscar Worthy filmmaking here. You are expecting Jason to kill people. Think about it.   There you go.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

Reasons Why "Return To The 36 Chambers" is Awesome.

It's hilarious, distrubing, perverse, scatalogical, homophobic, mysoginistic, violent, schizo-in short, it's what many a white rapper has tried to accomplish, and failed to deliever. Rza's Production-"My beats are slammin' from the rugged programmin'" He brags about being on welfare. "Brooklyn Zoo" is awesome, but "Damage", "Proteck Your Neck II In The Zoo" and "Harlem World" deserve plenty of love. "Drunk Game (Sweer Sugar Pie)" in it's entirety. "I'm the baddest Hip Hop Man on the Planet!" He raps, sings, howls, bellows, forgets his rhymes-it's the musical equivelent of a paranoid crackhead on open mic night. Like The Gravediggaz "6 Feet Deep", it does what Insane Clown Posse and many of their peers tried to do, but failed to in the fact that it's violent, sexist, and really fucking funny instead of completely horrible. The opening. "Never in the History of Hip Hop" has never been used so appropriately. He randomly sings "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" Words of aadvice: "Go To School. Take a shit. Don't wipe ya ass." His Hip Hop drops on ya head like ra-a-ain His balls are fragile like eggs. GZA's performance on "Damage" is among his most underrated-plus, it's fun to hear him loosen up a bit. Not only is there no other Hip Hop album like it, there's no other album quite like it. It's a realy one in a kind experience that everyone must experience to truly understand or love.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

TV Update-(Some) of us aren't dead yet

Cancelled Do Not Disturb-Yep, looked terrible anyways. No big loss. My Own Worse Enemy-Didn't like it much, though I do feel bad for Chritian Slater. Easy Money-Never saw it. The Ex List-Actually on Hiatus, so who knows. Future looks dim. Never watched it Lipstick Jungle-Poor Brooke Shields. Never Watched tthe show, but poor her. MadTV-THANK YOU GOD!!!!! Mind of Mencia-Again, Thank you God.     Future Uncertain   Life on Mars-Damn, I was really starting to like this show. It's not on the spring schedule. Dirty Sexy Money-Eh. Pushing Daisies-Damnit America, this show is awesome. Why does this have to be tanking. It's one of the best things on TV right now. It's smart, funny, cute, and more imaginative than most of what's on TV. I'm ashamed.     Future Looking Good   Chuck-Obvious, but good to see that. Gary Unmarried-I hang my head in shame. Fringe-Doing good ratings, and not a bad show to boot. Good for them. Knight Rider-America: I love you, but you have terrible taste in TV shows. Kath and Kim-Sucks, but seeing it's on between "My Name is Earl" and "The Office", not too suprising. 90210-Haven't seen it. Life-Not bad. Not a great show, but a good one, so good for them. Terminator: TSCC-Good for them, It's a lot better than I expected it to be, so yeah. Good tos ee James ("The Venture Bros.") Urbaniak getting work. According to Jim-Why? I have yet to meet one person who likes or watches this show.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

Abortion Fest '08 (or, Thanksgiving with relatives)

There's a lot of reasons why people don't want to go to meet relatives for Thanksgiving-mine just happens to be politics.   You see, I was raised Catholic (I consider myself a non-religious believer now), and well, my mom's side of the family is very Catholic and very strict about it. That means every issue for them turns into abortion. They obsess over it. That's the main reason they vote Republican-they hate abortion. Everytime you try to point out that they are wrong (no, Sarah Palin was not very bright, there's a reason more young people voted), they tell you "well, Obama's going to abort all the babies." I can understand why someone wouldn't like Obama (I did vote for him, but come on, this is America), but for the main reason being "grrr ABORTION!", that's just close minded. It was like talking to those people at Pro-Life rallies that hold pictures of aborted fetuses and shove them in your face, screaming "YOU SEE! YOU SEE!" Yes, I see, and that's a disgusting picture. Get that shit out of my face.   So yeah, Thanksgiving was fun when people weren't talking politics. Too bad about 65% of it was just that. I actually went into it thinking "I am not going to talk politics." That's wishful thinking. I hope your Thanksgiving was better.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

Final Best and Worst of Awards 08

-Comercials that most need to end-The Geico Cavemen. Look, it was amusing at first, but it got old fast. Now it's gotten past the point of flogging a dead horse-it's practically sodomizing it. The more I see these, the more annoyed I get.   -The finally cancelled award-Mind of Mencia and MadTV. While Mencia was horrible, it didn't pollute the airwaves as long as MadTV did. For giving the world terrible music video parodies, Ms. Swan, Stuart (I want to personally kill Michael McDonald), that annoying old lady who plugged her ears and said "La La La" over and over again, Bobby Lee, and helping to make Frank Caliendo a star, it may be the worst comedy show in history. At least it gave us Nicole Sullivan (who has always been easy on the eyes,), Phil Lamarr (who's turned out to be a pretty good voice actor), and Artie Lang, but that doesn't make for a case for forgivness. The crimes it has comitted are far too numerous.   -People actually like this?-Twilight. Really, when I was a kid, I saw a picture of Nosferatu. It gave me nightmares. Vampires should be cool, not this retarded shit. This almost makes the goth chic vampires of "Underworld" and their ilk look tolerable.   -Worst Food Network Personality-Guy Fieri. In a network with Paula Deen and Rachel Ray (who I'd fuck given the chance), this bleach blonede, sunglasses on the back of my head wearing douche makes my blood boil. My hatred of this man knows no bounds.   -Best type of Metal-Doom Metal. I like Technical Death Metal and Thrash and some Black Metal, but Doom is the best.   -Worst Critic-Armond White. A man who unironically references the Ting-Tings, hated "The Dark Knight", "Milk", "There Will Be Blood", "Slumdog Millionaire", and other acclaimed movies, but loved "Norbit" and "Chuck and Larry", he has to be a practical joke.   -Most Certifiable insane Presidential candidates-Cynthia McKinney and Lee Mercer jr. McKinney believes 9/11 conspiracies, that the government killed 5,000 men in New Orleans, and hates the Jews (kkktookmybabyaway comment forthcoming.) Mercer though-it's a shame his site is gone, because he was a whole golden pot of insanity. He also looked an awful lot like Michael Clark Duncan. Look him up on Google, you will be entertained for hours.   -Worst Avatar-Anyone with their picture as an Avatar-especially Enigma and NoCalMike. I can't believe I used to like Mike.   -Farewell To These Shows-"The Shield", "Pushing Daisies", and "The Wire." Shield and Wire are tied for me as best crime show ever, and had great runs, and while "Daisies" isn't gone yet, it will be soon. At least I still have "The Venture Bros."   -One Gets Worse and One Gets Better-"Family Guy" and "American Dad." "Family Guy" is so terrible now, I wonder if Seth isn't pulling some kind of "Wacky Deli" style prank on us. "American Dad" however, is much better, as it actually is funny, pays attention to things like plot and characterization, and doesn't rely on bad cut away gags. Plus, the social commentary is less forced and preachy.   -Worst Wrestling Promotion-TNA. I rarely mention wrestling here anymore, but TNA is like WCW in it's late period levels bad. It's like some kind of Dadaist interpretation of Professional Wrestling.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

The Friday The 13th Series: A Brief Retrospective

In case you didn't know, the "Friday the 13th" remake recently made the top spot in the box office. Well, in retrospective, here's a look at the series so far:   -Friday the 13th-A good beginning, though not the best in the series. Funny that for a film that helped set the staples for the slasher film, the original "Friday" feels more like an Itallian Giallo film than it does a slasher movie. Also, the arrow through the throat scene is still one of the best kills in horror history. Rating: 7/10   -Friday the 13th II-Along with Part 4, this is tied as my favorite entry in the series. Unlike the following sequals, there's a genuine sense of dread and eeriness pervading the proceedings, and the burlap sack mask is pretty interesting too. Rating: 8.5/10   -Friday the 13th III-Jason kills dumb teens in 3D for your enjoyment. A pretty fun entry, which introduced the Hockey Mask wearing Jason we all know today, and contains an oddly endearing quality to it beyond it's slasher movie trappings. Also worth noting is the dude with the Jewfro-a hairstyle originally meant to portray complete losers is now loved thanks to the likes of Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill. Rating: 8/10   -Friday the 13th IV-One of the best entries in the series, and featuring the most remorseless, vicious Jason in the history of the franchise. The presence of Crispen Glover doesn't hurt either. Rating: 8.5/10   -Friday the 13th V-Has the most nudity in the series, and some splendid kills as well. That out of the way, the film itself feels too much like its going through the motions, and is the first to show signs of the series losing steam. The fact that it's an imposter Jason doesn't help either. Rating: 5/10   -Friday the 13th VI-At this point, the series tries to inject more humor to the proceedings. While this doesn't hurt for the large part (Arnold Horshack getting knocked off is a huge plus,) it still doesn't live up to expectations, and again, shows the franchise running out of steam. Rating: 6/10   -Friday the 13th VII-Two major pluses: the introduction of Kane Hodder as Jason-simply put, he's the best Jason the series has ever had. Also, it has the best kill in the series-woman trapped in a sleeping bag slammed against a tree trunk. Sadly the MPAA cutting out much of the gore, and another sense of going through the motions (not even the evil bitch character-a slasher stereotype I love-can save this) makes this an unspectacular entry in the series. Rating: 5/10   -Friday the 13th VIII-Jason on a boat. Terrible not only as an entry in the series, but as a slasher movie overall. Nothing-not even the black guy getting his head knocked off-feels new or interesting, and the whole thing is proof that the series needed to die. Rating: 0/10   -Jason Goes To Hell-And takes the viewer with him in this horrible attempt to breath new life in the franchise. The less said the better. Rating: 0/10   -Jason X-Proofyour horror franchise is now a joke: put the villain in space. Actually, this is several steps up, with jokes that are actually funny ("We love pre-marital sex!") and one of the best kills in the series (cryogen frozen face shattered.) Watchable, but feels too much like a Sci-Fi channel made for TV movie to really work. Rating: 6/10   -Freddy vs. Jason-Fans were clammering for it, and here it was. While it doesn't live up to all of the expectations, it's still a good entry in the series, though admittingly, it;s a stringer "Nightmare on Elmstreet" movie than it is a "Friday the 13th" movie. Rating: 7/10   -Friday the 13th (Remake)-Yes, you've seen it before-but that's why it fun. A much needed reboot that feels more like an entry in the series than a remake, and the most vicious Jason since part IV.Sure, the score is unremarkable, and Jason is a bit too smart for his own good at times, but it's still a good entry that brings the fun back to the franchise. Rating: 7.5/10
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

2
How To Vibrate
 

Yet another boring entry.

Man, only one response? I must have the most boring blog in this place.   Anyways, I'm mostly posting today out of boredom. So, here's a list I made up, out of boredom.   8 things in music, and things about music fans, that annoy me.   1.) Bands who do entire albums either without a title, or without a song title. Really, it's the most pretentious thing on Earth. Examples of artists who have done this include Sigur Ros, Merzbow, and Farmers Manual. While I like Merzbow and Sigur Ros, I still find this annoying.   2.) People who constantly go on about what Punk was about back in the day. You wanna know something? Nobody will ever really know what punk was about, because it was about a lot of things. It wasn't about just one single thing.   3.) People who complain about Hip Hop. This usually comes from 1.) Classic Rock and Prog Rock fans, 2.) Jazz Snobs, and 3.) Racist Halfwits. Basically, the same kind of people who will debate Pink Floyd (who I love) or John Coltrane (not a diss on Coltrane, since I also love his work), but are either too boring, or too self important to recognize something different and innovative now and then. Just remember this rock snobs: You may badmouth someone like Acelyone, but remember that there was a time when the bands you loved were dismissed.   4.) Ridiculously long album titles. This is very common in the world of Post Rock (i.e. A Silver MT. Zion, GYBE!). While I do enjoy Post Rock, this really gets on my nerves.   5.) Tool fans. Most of the Tool fans I've encountered are incredibly boring pseudo-intellecualist pricks. Also, most ICP fans I've encountered are complete retards. Carnival is probably the only ICP fan I've discovered on the net who doesn't annoy me.   6.) Frank Zappa fans. Not really a complaint, but more of an observation: On every message board on the internet, there is someone who go on and on about Frank Zappas brilliance. Again, not a diss or complaint, just an observation.   7.) People who dismiss Pitchfork, but embrace other pretentious, scenester music websites. Sure, I think Pitchfork sucks, but people wh go on about why it sucks, but then embrace an equally pretentious webpage like Brainwashed are basically like the pot calling the kettle black.   8.) People who call you an idiot for liking a certain band. It seems like your not allowed to like bands like The Killers these days, because if you do, you'll have somebody call you an idiot, or go on a pointless rant (much like this one) about why they think that band sucks. Well, sorry that I haven't praised whatever new Sufjan Stevens album has come out, but there are bands that I can't bring myself to hate, so shove it hipsters.   Well, that's all I have to say.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

1
How To Vibrate
 

Here Comes the Hotstepper

-Birthday was alright. Nothing big happened, but nothing bad happened either.   -Tomorrow night, Adult Swim starts showing "Saved By The Bell". The reason this makes me happy is because it pisses people off. These guys love tofuck with their fans, and that's all kinds of awesome. The more pissed off Inuyasha fans there are, the better.   -It seems like Bush will never get rid of Rumsfeld. I know that this isn't a political blog, and I tend not to talk about politics, but I'm starting to wonder what it would take to get to get Rumsfeld fired. Come on, six retired generals want the guy out, yet Bush continues to say he's doing a great job. I swear, Rumsfeld could rape infants on live television, and Bush would continue to talk about how he's "doing a great job". It just amazes me.   -Thanks to everyone who wished me a happy birthday. For some reason, i wished that Leenawould have, but oh well.   that's all for now folks.
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

1
How To Vibrate
 

The Worst Shows on TV

First of all, I'm sure some of you have noticed that me and Red Hot Thumbtack In The Eye have been in an debate/argument. All I'm going to say is that I'm done arguing with him. He's not going to convince me or anyone else otherwise, and arguing with him is pointless.   Oh, and Burzum sucks.   Anyways, here's the real reason you folks are going to read this entry: Here's what I think are the worst shows on TV, and why I think they are the worst   -Flavor of Love Man Flava Flav, what happened? You went from telling us about Cold Lampin' to this? How the mighty have fallen. Also, why must they have the ultimate sterotypical white and black women on this show? Why is VH1 still around?   -Uranium Actually, this show would be much more tollerable if they got a new host. Sure, the girl they have right now is pretty hot, but she's so fucking annoying. Also, I like to call Fuse "The Angry White Boy Channel"   -Best Week Ever This IMO, is the worst thing on TV right now. None of the people one the show are funny (actually, Patton Oswald was on the show briefly, so they used to have someone on it that was funny), everyone on it is smary and obnoxious, and deserve a good beating. It also doesn't help when you remember that VH1 actually used to be a decent alternative to MTV. At least we still have VH1 classic.   -Minoriteam To Adult Swim: Sure, jokes about minorities can be amusing, but to base your entire show around stereotypes is just annoying. No, not offensive, just annoying.   -Mind of Mencia Chappelle Flies the Cukoo's nest, and his replacement: An annoying comic who makes half assed observations. Way to go guys!   -Medium Ever wonder what a crime drama/horror show/supernatural show would be like if it were catered to the soccer mom crowd? Here you go. Also, poor, poor Patricia Arquette.   -The O'Reilly Factor I'm not including this because of his Right Wing Bias, or whatever. I'm including this because this man is the most unproffesional personality on television today. Plus, I really hate the guy. He should take a note from Scarborough, or even Tucker Carlson. Sure, Joe gets on my nerves sometimes, and Carlson is a little twit, but at least they know how to act professionally.   -Inuyasha Out of all the anime shows on TV right now, this one's probably the worst. Sure, it probably doesn't help that I'm the only man on Earth who liked "Super Milk Chan", but at least that show didn't have the most retarded fans since Insane Clown Posse came along.   Next time: The Best Guilty Pleasures on TV (past and present)
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

1
How To Vibrate
 

Bologna Pony

Damn, I've got a ton of typing and writing as far as homework goes. Fortunately, I only have two or three weeks of classes left.   -It seems like Glenn Beck is slowly making it into my worst things on TV today list. I tried giving his show a shot, and it was just painful to watch, not to mention unfunny. The guy tries so hard to be funny, but fails. Also, his whole "I'm going to see the Da Vinci Code because supposidly, the French hate it!" comment was corny. I thought hating on the French went out of style a while back. Besides, the French gave us the movie High Tension, and the music of Francoise Hardy.   -Speaking of "The Da Vinci Code", who gives a flying fuck about it? The book sucked major balls, so the movie will most likely suck major balls as well.   -Hillary Clinton recently gave a speech that lambasted the current generation of kids. Now, I'm normally all for ripping on kids today. Hell, I hate kids today. But come on Hillary, you sound like that crazy old lady who yells at kids to get off her lawn. Eh, I never liked her that much anyway.   That's all for now. Next time: Will BUTT-Heads fear of commitment cause Beavis to become institutionalized?  
Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

1
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