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It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.

Entries in this blog

 

SHOCKING NEWS!!!!

Go away Enigma. Nobody likes you. Nobody cares about whatever useless newsbit you just got from The Observer. Nobody wants to see your long haired mug everytime you post. In fact, nobody likes it when you post. Just stop posting. Nobody will miss you. I doubt that even much of the WWE folder likes you that much. Nobody cares that some arena got torn down, or that Michael Cole turned 40, or whatever. Just stop it. Oh, and how do you know what gay smells like? "I smell a little bit of "the gay" around here is one of the worst things said on this board.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

Worst (and most annoying) People of '08

Not posters, people.   Wost Overall: Rod Blagojevich-It's all pretty obvious really. Trying to sell Obama's seat is one thing, and so is corruption, and that hair which makes him look like a giant Lego figurine, but witholding money from a fucking Children's hospital is another.   Rush Limbaugh-From racist comments, "Operation Chaos", and saying "COLIN POWELL ONLY SUPPORTS OBAMA CUZ HEZ BLACK LOL!", Rush contimues to make my blood boil.   Alex Jones and the 9/11 Truth Moviement-Also file under "why won't they go away" These idiots, no matter how many times they are proven wrong, no matter how many times science, common sense, and logic disproves them, continue to cling to straws, It's like arguing with a kid who just sticks their fingers in their ears and says "LA LA LA I'M NOT LISTENING!" Even Bill Clinton called them out.   Ron Paul Fans-The most annoying political supporters don't go to McCain, or to Obama-they go to Ron Paul. Picking up truthers, white supremacists, dumb anarchist kids, dumb teenagers, frat boys, socialists, hippies-they all flocked in. I hate them.   Lifetime Achievement Award-Robert Mugabe-As much as I dislike Bush, he ain't got shit on this motherfucker. Really. He earned it in a way. This is pure evil incarnate people.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

Songs I never want to hear in bars again

I frequent bars. Who doesn't? That out of the way, here is a list of songs I don't want to hear in a bar ever again, and why.   Bon Jovi-"Livin' On a Prayer" and "Bad Medicine"-There is nothing worse than coming into a bar and hearing a bunch of drunk fratboy's warbling Bon Jovi off key. These songs are the worst offenders, and need to be put to sleep in bars. Metallica-"Enter Sandman"-It's done to death people-we get it, you like to sing along to it after a long day, and then get high fives from your best pals. Also, what is up with tough guys singing along to "Nothing Else Matters" and getting all weepy. That song has the power to turn these guys into pussies in no time. Anything from Kid Rock-Really, just stop playing anything from him. Don't you ever wonder if the DJ, or if you frequent strip clubs (I don't-sorry) the strippers hate having to hear this, or at least get tired of it? Just stop playing this guy for the love of God. Garth Brooks-"Low Places"-It's like the ultimate drunk redneck asshole anthem. It's cancer to the ears. I'm from Southern Ohio, and if there is any modern country anthem that needs to be retired the most, it's this one. Fergie-"Fergilicious"-This has replaced "All I Wanna Do" and the works of Alanis Morrisete as the anthem from obnoxious FUPA and Gunt fat girls going crazy anthem. Anything from Jimmy Buffet-Along with The Eagles and John Mellancamp, nothing fills me with more rage than the works of Jimmy Buffet. Cartman was right about him BTW. Bob Seger-Turn the Page-It gets even worse if it's karaoke night. Actually, never go to a bar-ANY BAR-during karaoke night. AC/DC-"Highway to Hell," "Back in Black," and "Shook me All Night Long"-I like thse songs, but bars have ruined them for me some. Def Leppard-"Pour Some Sugar on Me"-Actually, girls dance really slutty when this plays, so keep playing it. So instead, let's go with... Poison-"Every Rose has it's Thorn"-There, much better. Anything from Sheryl Crow-Fat chicks with Jeff Hardy T-Shirts love singing along to her. It's as awful as you might think. Those are my pics. Feel free to add your own.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

A message to Chazz

Look, just wanted to let you know that you aren't threatening or imposing in any way, shape, or form, that you are terrible at comebacks (seriously, "Your Mom" jokes?) and insults (LOL OBAMA SOUNDS LIKE OSAMA, SO I'LL CALL HIM OSAMA!!! AREN'T I CLEVER), and that you are annoying if anything. So yeah, you should shut the fuck up.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

Best and Worst of TSM 2008

Best Poster-Agent of Oblivion. Honerable mention goes to Slayer, Venkman, Czech, Kamala, and Cheech.   Worst Poster-Tie between Marvin and the now banned Deon. Honerable mention goes to Marney, Superjerk, Chazz, Matt Young, Canadian Dragon, Taiga, cabbageboy, DarKnight, JPopStarKatsumi, kanerulesfan, Enigma, and Brody.   Best Thread-I Banned Choken One. Sure, Hawk 34 didn't deserve to be banned, but it lead to an excellent meltdown from Matt Young. Honerable mention goes to the Metal thread, where I was introduced to the likes of Paradise Lost, and talked about metal woth others. Nice to see other fans of Death.   Worst Thread-Campaign 2008. Oh yeah, I started it, but I had no idea it would lead to this: Marney's return (complete with racism and xenophobia), Marvin becoming even more annoying (yes, it was possible), Superjerk's not so well hidden issues with women and "Obama will fix everything" attitude, the liberal echo chamber growing louder, NoCalMike being an idiot-the list goes on. Honerable mention goes to this, where Marney got banned after she practically asked to be, and more happened, and the Guns n' Roses thread, which featured an ever annoying Jaxl and UYI. Hey Jaxl: 1.) Nobody but you and UYI gives a shit about Axl Rose, and 2.) Go back to telling stories about your life.   Not as Bad-EHME and The Truthiness, who don't annoy me that much these days.   Still Sucks-Marvin, who brought his act to new lows this year. Superjerk meanwhile, sucked up to Obama far too much, making me embarressed to like Obama. Chazz contines to be Chazz, Deon was finally banned, thank God, Enigma is still a mouthbreather, and Brody, who other than being a deviant, also pointlessly bumped threads (much like Deon and VanHalen, yet he doesn't get shit over it), posts unfunny pictues, and generally is not a good poster. Why people like him other than his off board antics is beyond me.   Favorite Post I Made (aka self fellatio)-Saying Taiga looks like Penn Jillette as a Post Op Tranny.    

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

Resident Evil:Extinction (Day 2)

02.) Resident Evil: Extinction (2007)

Plot: The third entry in the "Resident Evil" movie franchise sees Alice (Milla Jovovich) and a band of survivors from the previous (horrible) movie (including Oded Fehr and Mike "Where's Ice Cube?" Epps) and some new faces (Ali Larter as Claire Redfield and Ashanti-yes, that Ashanti) in a world reduced to a desert by the T-Virus. There's still plenty of undead, and the Umbrella Corperation want Alice-as she's the original. See, there's these clones-oh come on, you aren't watching this for plot.

Review: Not a good movie by any stretch of the imagination, the third entry in the series is actually the best of the series so far. Sure, it's far from original-cribbing elements from Day of the Dead (1985) (domesticating the dead) and The Mad Max movies (post apocalyptic desert landscape), but it at least has some decent points to go with the mindless action.

For starters, there is thankfully more undead action this time around, with sun baked zombies at nearly every corner. Also absent this time is dreadful Nu-Metal, and that's always a plus. The acting is at least competant, and the movie itself is the most competantly directed entry in the series, managing to make sure you don't get bored for the large part. Also, if you don't like Ashanti, you'll be glad to know her role is small (as is her time in the movie).

That out of the way, the fact that Alice has powers and superhuman abilities (from the last movie, which I like to pretend didn't happen) is really dumb. That reminds me, you really don't care about anybody in this movie, as there is no character development whatsoever throughout. People appaear and disappear, and those who die are people you really didn't see much of anyways. The ending also leaves room for yet another sequal, and really, do we need another one. Ok, it made about $150 Million worldwide, so it's inevetible. That out of the way,t he series needs to end, as we can't keep getting sequal after sequal. It's tiresome.

Still, it's a decent Saturday afternoon flick, and if you don't think too hard while watching it, you might sorta enjoy it.

Final Verdict: 6/10. Dumb popcorn entertainment not at it's best, but hardly at it's worst, and is at least the best "Resident evil" movie so far. Check it out if nothing else is on.

Next time: Zombie Bloodbath


Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

This Is How We Do It

This is How We Do It
La ra ra ra ra ra...

This is how we do it.
Its friday night, and I feel all right
The party is here on the west side
So I reach for my 40 and I turn it up
Designated driver take the keys to my truck
Hit the shore cause Im faded
Honeys in the street say, monty, yo we made it!
It feels so good in my hood tonight
The summertime skirts and the guys in kani
All the gang bangers forgot about the drive-by
You gotta get your groove on, before you go get paid
So tip up your cup and throw your hands up
And let me hear the party say

1- Im kinda buzzed and its all because
(this is how we do it)
South central does it like nobody does
(this is how we do it)
To all my neighbors you got much flavor
(this is how we do it)
Lets flip the track, bring the old school back
(this is how we do it)

This is how we do it, all hands are in the air
And wave them from here to there
If youre an o.g. mack or a wanna-be player
You see the hoods been good to me
Ever since I was a lower-case g
But now Im a big g. the girls see I got the money
A hundred-dollar bills yall

If you were from where Im from then you would know
That I gotta get mine in a big black truck
You can get yours in a 64

Whatever it is, the partys underway
So tip up your cup and throw your hands up
And let me hear the party say
(repeat 1...)

Im kinda buzzed and its all because
(this is how we do it)
South central does it like nobody does
(this is how we do it)
Ynv, scc, all my homies
(this is how we do it)
Ill never come wack on an old school track

Rap:

Check it out!
Once upon a time in 94
Montell made no money and life sure was slow
All they said was 68 he stood
And people thought the music that he made was good
There lived a d.j. and paul was his name
He came up to monty, this is what he said
You and og are gonna make some cash
Sell a million records and well make in a dash

(repeat 1, ad lib to fade...)

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

The Internet is driving me crazy

In case you didn't know, the internet is where political debate and a personal opinion go to die. Now everywhere I go online, I hear bullshit like "OBAMA A SECRET MUSLIM" or "PALIN AN EVIL WOMAN!"   This is what politics has transformed into: a shouting match. Taunting each other. Puffing one's chest. Saying retarded things like "Barack Obama HUSSEIN!!!!" This is not political discussion or observation. This is childish bullshit. This has become The Justice League vs. The Legion of Doom for some people. How else would you explain the popularity of political blogs that say the same right wing and left wing talking points?   This is retarded. I do not want McCaine to be the next president.* I also wish people on both sides were better than this, and that dumb personal attacks, "our way or the high way" and "America: love it or leave it" bullshit didn't exist. But it does. Maybe it's because the internet has given retarded mouth breathers a voice that no one with a properly functioning brain would want to hear. People should be better than this, but they aren't. In a perfect world, we wouldn't have the likes of Michael Moore and Sean Hannity. It's not a eprfect world though.   In short, until you have something to say that's 1.) Not a talking point, 2.) Actually intelligent, 3.) Not a stupid personal attack on character that has nothing to with the issues, or 4.) Mature, then I don't want to hear it. Blow it out of your ass. People like this are what's ruining political discourse in this country. It has gotten to a point where disagreement leads to insults and shouting. Come on, you can be better than that.     *I do however, want to fuck Palin's brains out.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

Obama is President

Yep, he's president. Deal with it. I don't want to hear any dumb "Osama" jokes kkktookmybabyaway, or any others. I do want to know how The Pit is taking it though, so let me know that.   This is pretty big news. If you don't realize this, then you are an idiot. If you don't like it, then tough shit. I'm happy at the moment. I will say though: McCain went out with grace, and Palin (Leena looks up to her BTW-bitch please) looked pissed. Free Republic is having a meltdown. I'm amazed Marvin hasn't killed himself or that Marney isn't plotting assasination (yet.) The Campaign 08 thread is where it belongs. Cynthia McKinney is still a joke, anyone who really thinks Bob Barr had changed is a sucker, Nader-it's like beating a dead horse. Czech, after months of bitching about Obama, voted for Obama. Marney probably muttered "fucking niggers." I almost feel bad for McCain. MikeSC is probably more paranoid than usual. Al Franken didn't win after all (I guess voters remembered "Stuart Saves His Family"), and I'm eally busy at the moment. And happy.   So congrats Obama.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

Abortion Fest '08 (or, Thanksgiving with relatives)

There's a lot of reasons why people don't want to go to meet relatives for Thanksgiving-mine just happens to be politics.   You see, I was raised Catholic (I consider myself a non-religious believer now), and well, my mom's side of the family is very Catholic and very strict about it. That means every issue for them turns into abortion. They obsess over it. That's the main reason they vote Republican-they hate abortion. Everytime you try to point out that they are wrong (no, Sarah Palin was not very bright, there's a reason more young people voted), they tell you "well, Obama's going to abort all the babies." I can understand why someone wouldn't like Obama (I did vote for him, but come on, this is America), but for the main reason being "grrr ABORTION!", that's just close minded. It was like talking to those people at Pro-Life rallies that hold pictures of aborted fetuses and shove them in your face, screaming "YOU SEE! YOU SEE!" Yes, I see, and that's a disgusting picture. Get that shit out of my face.   So yeah, Thanksgiving was fun when people weren't talking politics. Too bad about 65% of it was just that. I actually went into it thinking "I am not going to talk politics." That's wishful thinking. I hope your Thanksgiving was better.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

ROLLING STONE GAVE CHINESE DEMOCRACY 4 OUT OF 5 STARS!!!!

IT WILL OBVIOUSLY BE GREAT!!!!!!   Yeah, well they also gave St Anger 4 stars, as well as 50 Cent's The Massacre, Emiem's Encore, and several other shitty albums. 4 stars from Rolling Stone don't mean shit. Oh, and they gave Mick Jagger's Goddess on the Doorway 5 stars-no solo Mick Jagger solo album is good ,you out of touch cocksuckers.   Also, quit fooling yourselves: this is not Guns N' Roses. Yeah, it's called Guns N' Roses, but it's not, ok people. It's just Axl Rose (and his enormous ego's) solo project. Nothing more, nothing less. Oh, and it's pretty unlikely it will live up to all the hype.   Don't agree? Tough shit. Quit sucking the guy's cock and face the facts. Unless you forgot The Spagghetti Incident.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

A list of Creepy TV shows

In the history of television, there have always been shows that creeped me out for some reason or another. Here's a list of those shows.   -Wondershowzen: Granted, I like this show, but when people call it ther anti-Sesame Street, it's true. It's funny, but good God it's disturbing. The "Beat Kids" segments, while amusing, are just flat out creepy. How the hell do they get these kids to say this stuff anyways?   -MadTV: Not only the worst comedy show on TV. The skits were Michael "Being the Voice of Ghandi on Clone-High is the only good thing that happened in my career and oh God please, kill me before I open my fucking mouth" McDonald plays a man-child are not only lame, but also creepy. And I mean "Prisoners masturbate to this" creepy.   -Lazytown: If you've ever flipped through channels in the afternoon. then there's a good chance that you've seen this nightmare from Nick jr. Featuring unhealthy attention to men's packages and asses, and creepy puppets, this show is as disturbing as children's entertainment hets. The kicker though, is Stephanie, a girl (who's 15) with a pink wig and a disturbingly short skirt, who's become a pin-up fantasy for pedophiles world wide.   -Totally Spies: I've seen this on Cartoon Network, and I refuse to believe that it's a show for little girls. That's because each and every episode seems to have moments that focus on what get's the lonley animators off. Oh, and there's constant attention paid to female ass. While I have no problem looking at chicks asses, the fact that this is a cartoon, and for kids, puts a bad taste in my mouth. See also: Code Lyoko.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

TV Update-(Some) of us aren't dead yet

Cancelled Do Not Disturb-Yep, looked terrible anyways. No big loss. My Own Worse Enemy-Didn't like it much, though I do feel bad for Chritian Slater. Easy Money-Never saw it. The Ex List-Actually on Hiatus, so who knows. Future looks dim. Never watched it Lipstick Jungle-Poor Brooke Shields. Never Watched tthe show, but poor her. MadTV-THANK YOU GOD!!!!! Mind of Mencia-Again, Thank you God.     Future Uncertain   Life on Mars-Damn, I was really starting to like this show. It's not on the spring schedule. Dirty Sexy Money-Eh. Pushing Daisies-Damnit America, this show is awesome. Why does this have to be tanking. It's one of the best things on TV right now. It's smart, funny, cute, and more imaginative than most of what's on TV. I'm ashamed.     Future Looking Good   Chuck-Obvious, but good to see that. Gary Unmarried-I hang my head in shame. Fringe-Doing good ratings, and not a bad show to boot. Good for them. Knight Rider-America: I love you, but you have terrible taste in TV shows. Kath and Kim-Sucks, but seeing it's on between "My Name is Earl" and "The Office", not too suprising. 90210-Haven't seen it. Life-Not bad. Not a great show, but a good one, so good for them. Terminator: TSCC-Good for them, It's a lot better than I expected it to be, so yeah. Good tos ee James ("The Venture Bros.") Urbaniak getting work. According to Jim-Why? I have yet to meet one person who likes or watches this show.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

Reasons Why "Return To The 36 Chambers" is Awesome.

It's hilarious, distrubing, perverse, scatalogical, homophobic, mysoginistic, violent, schizo-in short, it's what many a white rapper has tried to accomplish, and failed to deliever. Rza's Production-"My beats are slammin' from the rugged programmin'" He brags about being on welfare. "Brooklyn Zoo" is awesome, but "Damage", "Proteck Your Neck II In The Zoo" and "Harlem World" deserve plenty of love. "Drunk Game (Sweer Sugar Pie)" in it's entirety. "I'm the baddest Hip Hop Man on the Planet!" He raps, sings, howls, bellows, forgets his rhymes-it's the musical equivelent of a paranoid crackhead on open mic night. Like The Gravediggaz "6 Feet Deep", it does what Insane Clown Posse and many of their peers tried to do, but failed to in the fact that it's violent, sexist, and really fucking funny instead of completely horrible. The opening. "Never in the History of Hip Hop" has never been used so appropriately. He randomly sings "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" Words of aadvice: "Go To School. Take a shit. Don't wipe ya ass." His Hip Hop drops on ya head like ra-a-ain His balls are fragile like eggs. GZA's performance on "Damage" is among his most underrated-plus, it's fun to hear him loosen up a bit. Not only is there no other Hip Hop album like it, there's no other album quite like it. It's a realy one in a kind experience that everyone must experience to truly understand or love.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

Return of The Mack

-First things first: That "mutant baby" picture (it's Czech's new Avatar Picture) scares the fucking shit out of me. That may be one of the scariest things I've seen on the internet, and I've seen some terrifying shit on the internet.   -I can seem to quit listening to the new Ghostface Killah album. It's that damn good. Anyone who enjoys hip hop should give this one a listen. Plus, it doesn't cost very much, and it's got some awesome producers (the late J.Dilla, Pete Rock, MF Doom, Just Blaze). Also, I'm looking forward to the new Current 93 CD (should be out by May or June), the new Aphex Twin CD (out on the 18th. It has the best tracks from last years Analord vinyl series), the new Mono album (a great post-rock band from Japan. It's being produced by Steve Albini), and a re-issue of shoegazer band Chapterhouse's album Whirlpool (complete with bonus tracks from ep's). Also, I might get the new Goldfrapp CD, and the new one from The Sounds (they are a new guilty pleasure for me).   -All of my classes were cancled yesterday. I still got a ton of homework to do.   -A guy in a dorm a few rooms from me keeps playing the three songs over and over again, and it's driving me crazy: Lovers And Friends by Usher w/ Lil' Jon and Ludacris, The Crossroads by Bone Thugs N Harmony, and Love by Keisha Cole. I have to hear these songs for 50 minutes every fucking morning.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

Underrated Album(s): Alice in Chains-Sap

Usually, when it comes to Alice in Chains' best album, people are usually split between Dirt and Jar of Flies. I know Black Lushus's favorite is Dirt, while I'm more of a fan of the Hard Rock/Acoustic Folk sound of Jar of Flies. However, this isn't about their best album, this is about their most underrated. For that, I choose the EP Sap.

Done after Facelift and before Dirt, Sap is a bit of a stop gap, and a major shift in tone after the sludge of Facelift. It sees the band exploring their acoustic ballad that doesn't suck/folk side that would be improved on Jar of Flies. However, it's still a good EP, save for the last track, the out of place (and annoying) comedy song "Love Song."

Opening track "Brother" features Cantrell on Vocals, with Ann Wilson from Heart offering backing vocals. The song is appropriately melancholy, with acoustic strumming and reflective lyrics taking hold. "Got Me Wrong" was the EP's single, as a video was made, and it was included on the soundtrack to "Clerks." It's a great duet between Layne and Jerry, that sounds almost upbeat, in spite of the cryptic lyrics, though the chorus presents some hope. "Right Turn" is a collaboration between the band and members of Soundgarden and Mudhoney. It's a little more light hearted than the previous songs ("But it's so hard/To penetrate pig thick skin"), and is the shortest song here. "Am I Inside" also features Ann Wilson, and is the eeriest track on the album, with mournful piano and acoustic guitar. There's a slight upbeat tempo change in the chorus, but the tone remains throughout.

As I said before, Jar of Flies improved the folk rock sound captured here. As it stands though, Sap is an unfortunately overlooked album in the band's career, and deserves more attention.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

 

The Madcap Laughs

This entry is dedicated to late Pink Floyd founder Syd Barrett, who died last week. RIP Syd, you will always be missed.   Syd Barrett 1946-2006 RIP   And now, onto other things   -I got Edward Lee's "The Bighead" last Saturday, and so far, it's great, and really disgusting. So far, it has consumption of shit, piss, rape, inbred rednecks, a profane priest, a nymphomaniac, cannibalism, hardcore sex, a disgusting bit with a colostomy bag, murder, a newborn baby having it's head bashed in, a pair of evil perverted nuns from hell, and more. And I'm not even half way done. I'll get to a review of it when I'm done, though at this point, it looks like a review of Joe Lansdales zombie western "Dead in the West" won't be for a long while.   -I got Thom Yorke's "The Eraser" Yesterday, and it's great. A lot of glitchy techno, with gutiar and bass only appearing (seperatly) on two tracks. Felonies said it reminded him of recent Radiohead b-sides, and I agree-and think that it's a good thing. I dig glitchy, weirds techno.   -There's problems right now between Isreal and Hizbollah. Well, what's new? I'm sorry, but there's always been problems in the Middle East. There have been problems in the Middle East for God knows how long. So, what do I think? Well, we can't settle it with war, because we can't get in another war. At the same time though, we can't solve this diplomatically, because as the past has proven, there is no real diplomatic solution right now, or possibly even in the future.   -"Little Man" is the number 2 movie in America right now, and proves once again that the majority of movie goers today are idiots.   -"The Venture Brothers" and "Tom Goes To The Mayor" continue to kick ass on Adult Swim. That is all.   That's all for now. Next time: Your guess is as good as mine.

Gary Floyd

Gary Floyd

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