10 a.m.
I’m not ragging on Scroby here – lord knows I have my share of low-paying job stories – it’s just his tale of a video game store boss taking advantage of customers made me chuckle.
It’s funny to think what constitutes taking advantage of a client depending on your line of work. The reason I mention this is that my one idiot boss always fucks over our customers – Scroby's post brought to mind of a situation earlier this year was when the idiot tried to get someone to convert to a different annuity so we could extend that person’s surrender charge. Problem was, that annuity didn’t best serve her. She’s older and the annuity that she was in was a better deal for her, so when my co-worker (who is in charge of financial services in name only) stumbled upon the paperwork for this annuity plan transfer, he immediately contacted this person and got her to keep her current annuity plan. This account was well into five figures and she would have been screwed out of at least $500 per year while having to keep her money with us for another six years in order to avoid early withdrawal penalties if she would have went with the idiot's plan, which could have been illegal because it's likely he didn't tell the customer, among other things, about the extended surrender charge, which is a very big "no-no."
9:30 a.m.
• I might not be going the route you may think I’m going with this one.
No, I don't have a Quickie Mart story of my own that's similar. In fact, I tried to minimize my chatting with Lottery People. I didn't give a shit if there was one scratch-off ticket left on a roll or if a new roll was on display. This is what popped in my head upon reading this story: A Quickie Mart-employed single mother with NINE maxed out credit cards plus almost $9,000 in debt for an ASSOCIATE’S DEGREE plays the lottery. (I’m sure this isn’t the first time she’s spent money on government-sanctioned gambling.) Why am I not surprised? I will give her credit. (Well, maybe not “credit” because she’ll max it out within a week – how about “props?) She went with the 20 payments instead of the lump sum, due to her inability to budget money.
8:30 p.m.
• So the better half returned the call of the matriarch of the test-tube welfare family and guess what Mrs. kkk was asked? If that abandoned house across the street from us was on the market.
Oh hell no.
Long story short. Many moons ago, the people who lived in that house died. The family of the deceased never wanted to sell it; however, they never bothered to keep up with maintenance. From what I heard, the furniture and shit is still in there. I’m sure it wouldn’t be a bad little house, but it’s going to need a good deal of work. That being said, there’s not fucking way I want those people living across the street from me. Mrs. Test Tube told the better half that she wants to move from the shithole of a house they bought two years ago and live somewhere in our school district, which is better than the one she’s at now. OK, if you wanted to live in a certain school district, when you already had two kids popped out from your snatch, WHY DID YOU PEOPLE BUY A HOUSE IN A DIFFERENT SCHOOL DISTRICT?!?! Jesus tap dancing Christ are these people pathetic. What’s funny is that if any houses are selling on my street they will be going for at least twice the amount of the house the test-tube welfare family currently live in – and these people can’t even keep up with their $300/month mortgage as-is. Not only that, but they will now have to sell the piece-of-shit house they are currently living in, and I bet they’ll be lucky to find a buyer, let alone try to break even on the sale. I swear to Christ I can’t stay around these people for more than five minutes without the urge to take a brick to the side of their collective heads.
2:30 p.m.
• So Drudge had the following link headline to an article about Chief Justice John Roberts' fall:
Now is the foam from his fall or because the High Court is going to be taking up some more affirmative action/gay marriage/abortion cases?
• So I've been hearing about this for a while now and just had to post this hilarity. You may have seen these ads pimping some government health-care program for "the children" called SCHIP (pronounced "chip" whenever I hear it).
Oh, no. And this from the state of DICK CHENEY~! How could anybody be against giving "the children" health-care coverage?
So does this mean if a 22-year old SCHIP recipient kills someone they could be tried as a youth?
1 p.m.
• And now it’s time for the Dr. Laura Call of the Day (or whenever I feel like doing this). Well, it’s not really the call per se, but rather the flashback I got when hearing this guy ask if he did the right thing. Long story short: His aunt is a mega-bitch and neither he nor his soon-to-be better half talk to her. There was some other history, too, but I wasn’t paying that close attention. They decided not to invite the aunt. This pissed off the guy’s mom, who said she no longer wants to be part of the wedding party and does not want to be introduced as his mother. The guy said “OK.” He wanted to know if he was in the right. Both Dr. Laura and I agree that he was. However, what inspired me to write this couple of hundred words was that when it came time for my wedding RSVP guest cards to come trickling in two years ago, I was hoping for quite a few people to say they couldn’t make my special day where the chain around my ankle gets clamped down for good. This way, I had an reason never to deal with them again for the rest of my life. That’s why I don’t visit the test-tube welfare family that I’ve talked about in the past here. However, I still have to attend that Memorial Day outing because that aunt showed up. Sonofabitch. Oh well, at least I have an excuse to ignore my two cousins from my idiot mother’s side for my remaining days. Woo-hoo!
10 a.m.
• Just heard on the radio that Robin Roberts has breast cancer. I remember watching her and Bob Ley on ESPN's Sunday SportsCenter back in the early 1990s. She's moved onto a network morning anchoring gig, and, although she's a commie and part of the mainstreamliberalpress, I always had a soft spot for her when thinking back to my formative years and remembering her talk about the day's sports headlines. Thank God she doesn't have to talk about "Who's Now" or any of that other shit going on now at that place. The first thing that comes to mind when hearing Roberts' name is this annual report ESPN does every year about some college football player crippling some other player in the South and how the one athlete visits the other's grave each year. At the end of this report, Roberts was trying to hold back her tears, and was doing a poor job at it. Nothing to be ashamed over. The radio update said the cancer was detected early, so you go, girlfriend.
8:15 a.m.
• So I'm listening to Monday's Dennis Miller radio show, and at the end of the first hour this caller Bob from New York is calling Dennis a puppet for the RIGHT-WING and that he's getting paid by the usual suspects, etc. Dennis asks him why he's so angry, and Bob just starts bitching with the usual you-get-paid-by-Bush talking points. Bob calls again during the second hour and says Dennis can't tell how anyone can be "angry" by just a phone call, or something like that.
"I'm going to suggest, Dennis, that you do not have the abilty to infer how angry I or anybody is from the words they say..."
"Bob, bye-bye. You're the first caller I cut off in four months. You know why? You're an idiot. Don't call back."
Funny stuff.
Since there was some talk about southwestern Ohio grocery stores in yesterday's entry, I figure now would be a good time to talk about why I can’t stand Bigg’s. Well, it’s not really a good time, but I’m feeling too lazy to talk about much else.
For those that don't know, Bigg’s is kinda like Wal-Mart, only not yet ready to take over the world. At the job I worked at in Ohio, many times I trekked over to the nearby Bigg’s and bought some grub during my lunch break. I did this for several reasons. 1) It was a nice little walk, and I needed to stretch my legs after sitting down for a 4-hour work interval. Oh who am I kidding – I spent most of the time goofing off, but it was a nice walk nevertheless. 2) Going to a grocery/retail store instead of heading toward Wendy’s or Burger King gives you a wider, and healthier, selection of food to choose from. 3) These lunches were cheaper, and more filling, than a value meal. The only problem with going to Bigg's several times a week was that most of the cashiers who worked there were full-timers, so I saw them just about everyday. This got annoying because many of them got on my nerves. However, I usually just zoned out during my transactions and tried to avoid the retarded chitchat many customer service representatives try to engage you in.
One day I had a friend with me who wanted to try out the “kkk lunch run;” we got a few items each and headed to a checkout lane. Now at every checkout lane there are these rubber sticks that are used as dividers in-between the orders of different customers. I call them the “Great Dividers.” Now, I use these things just like any other reasonable person would, however, on this day I didn’t. You see, the customer in front of me had his order rung up by the cashier, and as my friend and I approached the register there was nothing on this conveyer belt. I put my apple and a few other munchies on this belt and turned to say something to my companion. When I turned back, the cashier was weighing my apple as the customer in front of me just stood there. When I let the cashier know that apple was mine, she said “Well why didn’t you use the divider?” Because, bitch, I thought I’d be insulting your intelligence by using the Great Divider when there WAS NOTHING ELSE ON THE FUCKING CONVEYOR BELT.
I can’t remember what I said back to her, but it wasn’t offensive (if it was, then I would have remembered it verbatim). However, the encounter must have been tense enough for the person I was with because she took the Great Divider and separated her 2-3 items from my several things, which were on the other side of the conveyor belt next to the scanning device. The cashier then said something that made me laugh out loud. She picked up the Great Divider, pointed to my traveling mate’s stuff and snapped, "Are these yours?”
Well of course, bitch. Don’t you see the Great Divider?
I was only in Ohio for a few months after this encounter, but whenever I went to that Bigg’s I made it a point to always use the Great Divider every time I went into a checkout line. It was gratifying to go to the aforementioned bitch’s lane and whip out the Great Divider when I went to pay for my bagel, beverage and fruit, especially so if the person in front of me already had his or items items scanned and there was nothing else on the conveyor belt. Hey bitch, don’t question the power of the Great Divider.
I wish I could say this was the only time I had trouble with cashiers in the southwest Ohio region, but sadly it wasn’t. There was also the time I told a bag boy to get cancer, but that’s another story for another time.
8:30 p.m.
• You know, I was going to bitch about Fast Eddie and his additional tax ideas, but why bother when I have other reasons to bitch about government spending -- like 2,900,000,000,000 reasons.
I don't know what's sicker. The fact this is the number being proposed or that it's not going to be enough. Party of small government my ass.
• This caught my eye.
I know nothing about NASCAR, other than it makes a shitload of money. But you know what? If you're a NASCAR driver, you should know that there is no pension in place. What does that mean? SAVE your money! INVEST it wisely! Have other LIFE SKILLS besides driving really fast! Now a case could be made for the old-timers who may not have made as much money and helped turn this sport (yes, I called it a sport) into a cash cow, but that's another subject for another time. I'm talking about today's drivers making the big bucks; realize that you won't be doing this forever. Prepare for that.
Then again, if the rest of us don't save, why should NASCAR drivers?
8 p.m.
• I saw this on TSM, but I wanted to get more news on it. Oh hell no.
Words can't express how pissed Indy 4 makes me. Well, not pissed that I'd go out and kill. It's about as pissed as I'll get when it comes to movies that shouldn't be made. I'm sure I'll rant about why I hate this idea someday, but I just don't feel like it right now.
12:30 p.m.
• And now it’s time for the Dr. Laura Call(ers) of the day (or whenever I feel like doing this. Chick number one: She’s living with her boyfriend and away from her parents so she’s “depressed.” The other night her and the boyfriend got into a huge fight because “he’s not there to console me.” She can’t remember what she said to him during this fight, but she knows it caused him to rip apart a wall. OK then. Chick number two: She’s asking for advice about her boyfriend who “turned Christian” early in their relationship and caught him going after 13- to- 15 year-old girls on My Space. He’s also mad at her because she’s not a virgin. And this is only in the show’s first segment.
10 p.m.
• I haven't seen "Casino Royale" yet, but did this really happen? If so, I hope he also wore a seat belt whenever he was in a car.
7:30 p.m.
• So this past weekend the brother-in-law had some Halloween trail set up in the woods behind his house for his kids and a number of their friends, and I was one of the people that did stuff to scare the kids. No, I didn’t tell them about the story of my life. I hid in some trees and threw these ghosts disguised as plastic bags with stuff in them. Of course the one ghosts no-sold my attempt at releasing it, but the other one that swung at an angle hit some kid in the head and had him screaming like a girl. Good. This kid has been over my brother-in-law’s house during his son’s birthday parties and stuff, and he’s a little spazz. Of course, I had no idea it was him that I hit. My instructions were to aim for the center of the herd. Then again, it wasn't as bad as the chainsaw guy not being able to start up his weapon of choice, but that's what happens when there's more empty bottles of beer out along the trail than there are actual people. Despite all these glitches, this first-ever jaunt was a success. Too bad in a few years these kids will be out back in the wilderness screwing rather than bobbing for apples. They grow up so fast.
Afterward, when all the kids left, a group of us gathered around the kitchen table and stuffed ourselves with all sorts of sugary shit. Among the plates of gummy worm chocolate cake, several kinds of puddings, chips, nachos and other junk food, there was a huge bowl of candy with real bars of Crunches and Hershey bars. Being in the mood for a Kit-Kat, I took one and ate it. On the way home the following conversation was had. Figure out who is who.
Seriously, who starts collecting candy in the middle of October and puts it as part of their Halloween stash? And these weren’t those gay “fun bars.” These were full-fledged regular-sized candy bars. And there was a HUGE bowl full of them. Christ, their teeth will be falling out if they ate all that shit. I remember one year I kept my candy supply until the new year. Not sure why. I guess maybe to prove to myself I could. *Shrug.*
8 a.m.
• So SUPER TUESDAY has come and went. Whatever. No matter who gets the nomination for my side or the other I’ll probably be ill. Sad thing is, I started thinking about who in my Party could be a viable candidate. I can’t think of anyone. Christ, and my commie neighbors will probably have Hitlery or Obama signs on their lawns this year. I might just get a McCain sign just to piss them off. I still have yet to make my mark on the primary season. Thanks, PA.
• I need to pay attention to the NBA more often than just before playoff time.
You know, I'd like to see this go down just to see Shaq Daddy run up and down the court like a fiend.
6:30 p.m.
• Well today we had to go to the hospital to get kkk jr. out of the better half. The procedure is known as a D&C. The whole thing took about 10-15 minutes, but the waiting/prep/etc. lasted the entire day. Even though the experience was godawful, I’ll say this: After walking by some of the “cancer centers” it could have been MUCH worse.
• I thought about this earlier today while watching footage of the Giants ticker-tape parade. You know who has got to have a shitty job? The people that plan for those kinds of events only to have the hometown team lose. I can’t imagine how much planning would be involved in arranging the security/travel/etc., and then to have nothing to show for it. Ugh.
10:30 p.m.
• Esiason just said it was great that Tony Dungy gave thanks to "his" God. Esiason is a Muslim? Maybe that's why he's called "Boom"er.
10:15 p.m.
• I love Tony Dungy. When asked in the post-game segment about him being THE FIRST BLACK HEAD COACH TO WIN A SUPER BOWL, he said that was significant, but it was more significant that he and Lovie Smith were CHRISTIAN coaches. The New York Slimes is going to hate printing that.
10 p.m.
• The MVP award will probably go to Manning, but I'd vote for Colts' running backs. I think "co-" awards are gay, but Rhodes has 110+ yards rushing, and Addai has 10 catches.
9:45 p.m.
• No more "CONGRATS BLACK PEOPLE FOR HAVING TWO HEAD COACHES IN THIS GAME" ads. Please. For the love of God. Also, ain't it funny that in this game that features TWO BLACK HEAD COACHES, the most notable person in this game (unless something drastic happens in the last seven minutes of regulation) is the Jew quarterback?
• Don't blame me. I voted for Swann.
2 p.m.
• Hey, did I mention I went two-for-two in my Conference Championship picks? Yay, and stuff. Now it’s time to pick the Super Bowl. How will this game go? Who knows. I can see this contest going a number of ways. Will the Colts light up the scoreboard like the 49ers did against the Chargers back in XXIX, or will the Bears grind it out against a much more potent offense than their own, like the Giants did against the Bills in XXV? Will a big special teams play turn the course of the game, like the Packers had in Desmond Howard against the Patriots in XXXI? all of these scenarios are possible; all you have to do is just pick one and hope it works out. When looking at Super Bowls, particularly ones more recent, two things come to mind.
A great defense tends to best a great offense.
With all the hype leading up to this game, many times it seems it takes a quarter or so for one team (or both) to get situated.
Another thing I look at is the secondary matchup. Sure the marquee contest is Indy’s offense against Chicago’s defense. However, the game will probably be determined when the other units are on the field. If the Colts defense stuffs the Bears offense, it’s over and vice versa. Because of everything I have mentioned above, I’m going with the Bears 23, Colts 20. I’m now expecting a 49-0 blowout of the Bears in a few hours.
• One sorta tradition I have done off and on during this time of the year is watching highlights from previous Super Bowls. I just watched a few hours’ worth this afternoon, and I have to say that I don’t like the seemingly recent trend of mentioning what the halftime show was about. The Eagles/Pats recap talked about Paul McCartney, and the Seahawks/Steelers show mentioned the Rolling Stones. Odd how the Panthers/Patriots mid-game entertainment wasn’t mentioned. I have to say I don’t like the “newer” Super Bowl recaps of the 90s-00s, but whatever. NFL Films knows more than me about the subject of video production.
6:45 p.m.
• Oh you got to be kidding me. ESPN has Racist Dusty as a commentator? I just saw him on SportsCenter talking about the NL East. Oddly enough, Racist Dusty didn’t mention which teams will start out the season fast but finish slow in those chilly September nights due to a plethora of black players on their roster.
• I can't wait to hear Circuit City bitch a year from now about how they can't find any good workers.
If you’ve read my blog or posts for any length of time, chances are you know my opinion toward unions, "worker's rights" and all that other hippie shit, but whenever I read stuff like this, I get irked. Then again, in a free market, you always have to be on the go and ready to change jobs; staying at a place for 30 years is a thing of the past. Kind of a shame, really, but it’s a fact of life. Great, now I’m sounding like a commie. I need to change the subject … stat.
• Much better.
9 a.m.
• I'm a cat person, but I got to admit that there's no way any of my three would be able to pull this off.
7 a.m.
• So I just heard on the news that Fast Eddie's attempt to jack up the state cigarette tax an extra dime is approved by voters in a poll by a count of 54 to 46 percent. Now I don’t smoke and I don’t care about those that do. However, I do have a soft spot for smokers if only because I treat them like disposable front-line infantrymen (and women) in the war on the State taxing its constituents. If smoking ever gets banned, or taxed to the point where not enough people won't purchase the product, then Big Brother will go and tax up the wazoo something else – perhaps something I like. Well anyway, I heard in this news blurb that the dime increase will make PA’s tax on a pack of smokes $1.45. And we bitch about BIG OIL for price gouging? Yikes.
• I’ve been rooting for the Penguins and their mid-season surge to the NHL playoffs, if only because I hope it reminds people that Fast Eddie and Shittsburgh did jack shit to keep them here (yet our local leaders bent over backwards for the Pirates when they were in "danger" of leaving town). Last night they clinched a postseason spot. Uh, yay and stuff. I normally don’t watch the Penguins on television for a full game. If I’m putting away groceries or channel surfing and a game is being televised, I’ll keep it on depending on my mood. Well last night I had the start of the game on against the Washington Capitals while I got back from the grocery store. Every time I have a Penguins game on at the start of the contest they stink up the arena, and last night was no exception as Washington got off to a 2-0 lead. I changed channels for a few hours and came back to the game. What was the score when I returned to the game? 4-2 Pens.
9:30 p.m.
• Yeah, too bad if these kids got killed by the cops you wouldn't be saying this "now's not the time for blame" shit.
Here's my favorite part.
I think God was trying to tell you that you're a shitty mother and your kids are better up there with him than down there with you.
Living about 30 miles from the area, this has gotten a good deal of coverage (I made a remark about this story last week), and, if the rumors are true, it sounds like the two mothers would lock their kids up while they would go to the nearby bar.
1:45 p.m.
• Dedicated to the recently hitched Smitty and SFA Jack. Not to each other, though. Although I wouldn't be surprised if Smitty lives for the cock.
So Friday my old lady sends the better half and I an anniversary gift: some money. Whatever. I’m not 10 anymore but you never look a gift check in the mouth, or at least until after it clears. Last night when I got home from work Mrs. kkk struck up the following conversation regarding said windfall.
Her: “You know what I was thinking we could do with that money? Since we weren’t expecting it, we could use it to buy a new door for the back porch.”
Me: “You know what I was thinking we could do with that money? Pay off credit-card debt.”
There was a moment of silence, then she responds with this: “Well, I don’t want to put the new screen door in the back until we replace that back door first.”
Here’s some backstory. While paying off the better half’s credit-card debt, we made an agreement that she could get two screen doors this summer to replace the shitty ones that came with the house when we bought it in 2004. Well, these new doors we recently bought aren’t screen doors, but whatever. They’re those secondary doors where when you open the main door your cats can look outside with no problems. Here's the one we got for the front entrance.
Side note: I would like to point out that the old front screen door did have a huge rip in it because Dessa (pictured bottom left) got out a few months ago and decided that she didn’t like it out there, ripped a hole in the screen, jumped in-between the two doors and cried until one of us realized she was no longer in the house. Back to my story.
Of course, the cost of these things (one for the front door, one for the back) was more than what Mrs. kkk said they were going to be. Big shock there. But here’s my favorite part. After making my remark up above, she then mentions that she now wants to replace the main back door before putting on the back screen door. When did we decide on this shit? Is that supposed to be some kind of threat that oh no we have a screen door paid for but won’t install it until we go out and buy another door? My response to her response to my first response to her first response.
“OK, then the screen door will stay in the garage.”
Yeah, I have no idea how she ended up with $20k in credit-card debt. The really sad thing is that we’ve almost finished paying off the aforementioned debt and now she’s thinking it’s time to go out and accrue more expenses.
Here’s another example of wedded bliss that took place early in the week on the way home from work. I’m sure you can figure out who is who in this conversation.
“What’s wrong with your mouth?”
“I cut my lip”
“What happened?”
“I don’t want to talk about it – it’s stupid.”
“No, what happened?”
“I did something stupid and paid the price.”
“What was it?”
“It’s not a big deal.”
“Come on, what was it.”
“I cut myself licking a noodle off my Campbell’s soup can during lunch at work today.”
“Why did you do that?”
“I said before I wasn’t thinking when I did it.”
“You know you’re not supposed to do that. You could get hurt doing that. That was stupid.”
“No shit.”
“Why would you do something about that?”
“I said before I wasn’t thinking when I did it.”
“I can’t believe you did something that stupid.”
“I said before I wasn’t thinking when I did it.”
“You not going to get any sympathy from me.”
“When was I asking for any?”
The rest of the conversation is a blur. All I remember is at some point she said, “why am I with you?” Later on I turned up the car radio and connected a few right crosses to her face. Then again, I think this isn’t so much “wedded bliss,” rather than it being “together with someone for 10 years” bliss.
“I do.” Ain’t those two little words a bitch? Happy matrimony, guys.
I justy noticed my USA Today insert that's in my Sunday paper has a cover story talking about "Marriage and Money." Oh this should be good.
This just in. Right as I'm typing, the better half just came in and said, "honey, I just hit myself in the head off the house." Oh this should be even better. DEVELOPING...
8:45 p.m.
• Well today was my first day at the new job. Man, I wish you could just fast-forward a few months to the point where you get a handle on what you’re doing. I hate this “OK, now what do I do?” crap. I know this job isn’t as hard as I’m making it out to be, but I am one of those people that actually gives a crap about the work I produce and it will be hard to do anything tomorrow because I’ll be taking a three-day trip Wednesday through Friday (which probably means no KK’s Korner) to some work conference that will probably help me out quite a bit. I'm sure in six months I'll be bitching that I don't get paid enough for what I do.
• So while I was gone today, the better half “reorganized” the closets. Instead of having one closet for each of us, we now have one for our room and a closet for kkk Jr. She has “our” closet split in half – one side with a bunch of hippie shelves, the other side a “normal” look. Guess which one of us has all our things on shelves? Yep. I guess that’s what happens when one person gets MLK day off and one person doesn’t. I'm actually impressed that she managed to fit all our shit into one closet, but I know there will be problems with space in the future. Oh well, that's for another time I guess.
Well Thanksgiving was harmless enough. No crack whore. No out-of-control teen niece-in-law. Just food. And lots of it. I’m generally a no-frills eater, and Turkey Day is no exception to this rule. Just give me turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and corn and I’m happy. I love yams, but they get in the way, as do green beans. As for the other shit that’s put out on our buffet spread, bah, I don’t care. Since the better half can’t eat poultry because it gets her sick, she always makes these veggie dishes that make me want to gag. This year her concoction involved several different kinds of peppers, onions and stringy green beans. She also made these hippie stuffed mushroom things, which weren’t much better. And guess who had to hold both containers in his lap during the drive to the in-laws? Yep.
After stuffing myself silly on this one day of the year where it’s OK to be a pig (I had three full plates worth of the goodness mentioned above; I was so sick afterward I couldn’t get up from the recliner), there is another tradition I have taken part in the last few years. That tradition is going out on Black Friday to be one of those idiots trying to get good deals at 6 a.m. Unfortunately, I did no such thing this year. There were some things I would have gobbled up like the food I had consumed the day before, but I made a promise to myself that the better half’s credit card debt comes first. Oh the sacrifices I make.
The funny thing about Black Friday is that with all the stupid stories I have about life at the Quickie Mart, the food-service industry and the theater, along the other day-to-day experiences I have encountered during my brief time on this planet, I really don’t have any Black Friday experiences worth telling. I think part of the reason is that because I’m a strapping young lad most people don’t try to trample over me in order to get to that $20 DVD player. I mean, I’ve heard people bitching while at Best Buy or Kohls trying to get a $5 toaster or $3 video game, but it was nothing worth repeating. Basically, whenever I’m in one of these situations I just stay in line and zone out because I know I’ll be standing around for quite a long time. In lieu of any worthwhile Black Friday stories, let me try and remember what I got last year at this time.
Best Buy: Hell, I don’t remember. Probably some DVDs.
Target: Some DVD’s, I think. I know that’s when I got Napoleon Dynamite and that Family Guy Stewie Special. Now for those that always label me a negative ninny, let me say that I’m not actually all that upset for dredging through the Black Friday mess for these two DVDs: one that was disappointing and the other that was a full-fledged piece of shit. In fact, I’m glad I bought Napoleon Dynamite at the price I did because otherwise I would have had to kill someone for paying a higher price for that garbage.
Kohls: Some “Scene It?” games, a food vacuum sucker thing, a mini fryer that’s been used all of one time, and some other shit I can’t remember.
Office Max: A shredder, these nice computer speakers and some work-related office supplies stuff. Call me an employee with a bad attitude if you want, but one thing I know how to do is keep my department’s costs down.
Mall: I don’t think I got anything.
GameStop: A few video games, Star Wars Battlefront being the one that jumps out. Oh, and NHL ’06 and Grand Turismo 3.
Wal-Mart: I think last year was when I got a vacuum “lite” for the basement. Not quite a “real” vacuum, but not a hand-held either. Still works rather well.
All in all, I remember saving several hundred dollars, so yes, missing out on this year’s Black Friday did take some willpower for me to accomplish. Good thing that “turkey dope” didn’t make me all that motivated to get up and go shopping the next day. Well, that and staying up until 4 a.m. playing video games. Oh, and did I mention that aside from the things I bought for Mrs. kkk, all of this shit was purchased for me? You people with the somewhat normal families and your holiday get-togethers: keep 'em. I want none of that shit.
8 p.m.
• So today was primary day in my state, and this usually means a boring day at the polls. Not this time.
I have no clue who is running for what locally in these primaries. It really doesn’t matter anyway, considering the same candidates are on both tickets. However, I wanted to vote on two referendums. The first dealt with Fast Eddie’s desire to raise my taxes again. Fuck you, you piece of shit. You’re going to raise my taxes anyway, you rat bastard – there’s no way in hell I’m going to vote for it. Of course I voted “no” on this. However, the second referendum dealt with funding for our local hippie library. Want to know what I think about this issue? Peep this. Well, as I was walking into to the polling place, this woman was standing outside the fire hall entrance, and I knew she was going to pimp trying to keep this hippie library open. I try to treat these people the same way I treat children and those kiosk people at the mall. I ignore them. However, if they approach and fire the first shot, then I will fire back. Today was one of those days. Here’s how the exchange went.
“Do you have any questions about *name of ballot issue*?” She then handed me a flyer telling me to vote “No,” which means keeping funding as-is for the library.
“No. I’m voting to close it down,” and without missing a beat I head straight into the polling place.
Game. Set Match.
After several minutes, the better half stormed into the polling place, slapped me on my shoulder and said “what the hell is wrong with you?” I said, “what?” However, I knew what was coming because I heard that woman say Mrs. kkk "is he serious?"
Mrs. kkk: “Did you see the look on that woman’s face.”
Me: “No, why?”
Mrs. kkk: “She said to me ‘is he serious?’ and then asked me if I was your wife.”
Me: “And what did you say?”
Mrs. kkk: “I have never been so embarrassed in my life.”
Too fucking bad. If you’re one of those grassroots lobbyists, then you better be prepared to deal with people that disagree with you. If you can’t take it, then get the fuck out of my way and let me cast my vote. I’m not going to cower because some person isn’t going to agree with my opinion. If you want to make your issue preference known, then I will, too. Oh, and I voted for some right-wing judge for state supreme court. The other candidates I didn’t vote for because I didn’t know who they were. But this wasn’t the only instance today in which I pissed off the better half…
kkk twin-spin
After voting against the library so grandma will have to get internet access on her own, it was time for grocery shopping. Now Mrs. kkk wanted to get two 24 packs of Pepsi for $10 because her church is having some “burger bash” fundraiser, and they were in need of beverages to sell for $1 a piece. The following conversation took place in the parking lot.
Me: “So we’re getting $10 of pop so your church can gouge its customers?”
Mrs. kkk: “It’s for a good cause.”
Me: “So your church is telling you to take a can of pop you bought for twenty cents and mark-up the price fivefold. What would Jesus think?”
Mrs. kkk:“*something about how Jesus would approve or something*”
Me: “I’d like to know how much he charged when he made all that bread and fish. Overcharging Jews; no wonder he got crucified.”
Mrs. kkk: “That is so wrong on so many levels.”
Oh, and the better half voted for the library. Bitch.
8:30 a.m.
• So this article got my interest today in the Shittsburgh Post-Gazette (I picked up the publication’s “early edition” yesterday while filling up the car on the way home from an extra day at work – yes, I’m doing the “work on Saturday” thing again. And I didn’t get this liberal rag because this article was the top-of-fold cover story. I got it because it had $98 worth of coupons.)
Here’s the headline: Rising costs, frugal customers pinch restaurants at both ends
Basically, it’s talking about how it’s HARDER THAN EVER for restaurants to attract customers due to the TERRIBLE ECONOMY. Here were my favorite parts.
OK, I love how vendors are now adding “fuel surcharges.” Just increase your total bill. Will there be a “wheat surcharge” or “dairy surcharge” at pizza shops when vendors increase their prices due to rising costs for these products? No. Then why fuel? Because we can blame BIG OIL and their OBSCENE PROFITS. I’m not saying increased fuel prices don’t hurt a business. One of my biggest fears about increasing gas prices isn’t the extra few dollars I have to pay to put fuel in my car – it’s how increases the price of everything. However, taking this one extra cost of doing business, singling it out and itemizing it is lame.
Here was another golden nugget.
But… but… I thought raising the minimum wage wouldn’t affect anybody or anything. I thought all those “you raise the minimum wage and the people who need these entry-level jobs the most won’t get them” chicken littles were practicing right-wing fear-mongering tactics. Maybe Kings restaurant donated to Bush in the ’04 election. Yeah, that’s it.
And despite all of these obstacles and doom-and-gloom, restaurants still experienced sales growth, albeit at a reduced rate.
4 p.m.
• Yeah, "creative solutions." Read: Rate hike.
• Well, at least the Post Office has this windfall to rely on.
I got my letter yesterday. What's really funny is that people who get this letter and don't read it will then bitch about something or other related to this program in May. And Schmuck Jewmer, what would you like to have on the letter: every name of every Democrat in Congress? For the record, this sort of bitching went on back in '01 when W. got those rebate checks mailed. Personally, I don't think these letters should be mailed. There should be some civic-related requirement, meaning if you don't pay attention to the news and don't know about this give-away then you deserve what you get -- or don't get.
KKK’s Top 103 Posters
Number 66: Y2Jerk
I understand that Y2Jerk may not be the most popular poster around these parts. However, this sparring with Your Paragon of Virtue stems from a recent CE thread, which is located in a folder whose newer topics from the last year or so I have all but exiled myself from. But during the glory days of this particular folder, I had quite a fondness for Mr. Jerk. No, it wasn’t that I agreed with his leftist opinions, but rather because I found his epic multi-thread battles with MikeSC to be the stuff of CE legend. Whether they quarreled over whether or not Islam was a death cult, or when they goofed on each other’s line of work, one could rest assured that during spring of ’05 there would be a Y2Jerk/MikeSC clash of the day. So in the spirit of "Mike vs. Jerk is the CE folder equivalent of HHH vs. HBK," let me whip out a still-frame of their last epic battle before the TSM mods decided to finally ban Mike once and for all.
And now a word or seven from the expert panel I have put together to comment on the people I’ve listed.
From Black Lushus:
From EricMM:
From Bob Barron:
From SFA Jack:
From Carnival:
From Cancer Marney:
From Lovecraft:
• Now I like a good “own3d” picture just as much as the next person, but one I recently saw in TSM’s “Post your favorite ‘Owned!’” thread has me scratching my head. It’s the one with the black guy playing Connect 4.
As our negro friend gets his piece ready for the winning shot, which is where I'm assuming the "owning" is taking place, I noticed that it appears he has already won the game with four diagonal red discs in a row from the bottom right corner up.
10:30 p.m.
• So I just got done watching the new “Bad News Bears.” Sure it was pretty much the same as the old version, but actually it wasn’t all that bad. I’m not a huge fan of the first film, so I’m not going to go “OMG they changed it to make it all PC and shit.” In fact, it seemed like this version was more offensive. There were some things I thought were better in the ‘70s version (like how the chick ends up “losing” the bet with that Kelly kid), but on the other hand there were some modern-day gags I liked (the cripple catching the ball at the end was cute). Oh, yeah. And how can you go wrong with dialogue like this?
And I have no idea who Marcia Gay Harden was until this film, but damn was she a MILF, even for a lawyer.
One thing that struck me though was it would actually be cool to coach a team like this, if only because you could get some non-PC company to sponsor the uniforms. I’ve mentioned before that there’s this bar/restaurant down the street from me whose owner puts up this kind of stuff on his marquee all the time. His most recent line is something about getting wetbacks out of the country (don’t worry, commies, he hates W., too). I’d love to have him as my team’s sponsor. I’d let him put stuff on the back of the jerseys like…
Want to see more. Peep this.
7 p.m.
• He came. He saw. He stole elections. He shifted hurricanes to black neighborhoods. He sloppily constructed levees in said black neighborhoods. He made Halliburton billions of dollars.
I <{ Karl Rove.
10 a.m.
• So is North Korea now part of the Axis of Not-So-Nice?
• Yet another ruling by the uber-conservative Supreme Court.
Actually, I have the perfect solution. Don't execute these kiddie rapists. Just toss them into a prison's general population. Everybody's happy.
• Speaking of adult/kid sex. I wondered why these "To Catch a Predator" shows weren't on anymore.
Bummer. This was the best thing on television. I think I remember NBC airing that bit with the guy killing himself. Yeah, he was innocent.
6 p.m.
• What would a kkk-led nation be like? Here you go.
And down the final stretch I come:
Cleveland at Pittsburgh (7.5)
The Browns are riding high after an upset win against the Chiefs last week. Now they come to Shittsburgh to take on a divisional foe who they should have beaten a few weeks ago. Will they emerge victorious this week? I don't know, but I'll take them with that point spread the way it is.
(3.5) Atlanta at Tampa Bay
I'm helping out the Falcons in their attempt to reach the postseason. I know if I would have picked them, the Bucs would have defeated them, thus prompting me to say the following week, "Atlanta's late-season collapse is still alive and well, and I fell into the trap of thinking they'd win two in a row." This is why I'm picking Tampa Bay, so that way I don't have to say the above sentence in next week's entry.
Baltimore at Kansas City (2.5)
Kansas City is a tough place to play at, but the Ravens defense is a tough unit to run against. I guess I could look up the stats and see if this is actually true, but that would requre effort.
Buffalo at N.Y. Jets (4.5)
I never thought this game could have playoff implications this late in the season, but it does. Good for everyone involved. I'm taking the Bills due to the spread.
(1.5) Indianapolis at Jacksonville
The Jags have been off-and-on this year while the Colts have been a bit more consistent. With me taking Indy, perhaps this is the game in which Jacksonville gets over the hump.
Minnesota at Detroit (2.5)
The Vikings have been struggling as of late, although I wouldn't consider their woes to be that dire where the Lions are the favored team in this matchup.
(3.5) New England at Miami
Hmm, the Pats were nearly upset last week at home against Detroit. The Dolphins were defeated by the Jags at home. I'll go with New England to rebound against a divisional opponent.
New Orleans at Dallas (6.5)
I'm sure Dallas will win, but that spread. Well, the Cowboys have that defense. Plus they're at home. OK then.
N.Y. Giants at Carolina (3.5)
Each team has been inconsistent as of late, so it's a case of pick your poison. I'll take Carolina.
Oakland at Cincinnati (10.5)
I don't like that point spread, but Cincinnati is a lot different than Oakland weather-wise this time of the year.
(1.5) Philadelphia at Washington
I'll take my chances with Jeff Garcia, who I forgot was with the Eagles this year. I feel bad for the guy. Back in his San Francisco days, Terrell Owens made some homophobic remarks toward him and the national sports media didn't show a fraction of the outrage it had over T.O. and his feud with Donovan McNabb.
Tennessee at Houston (1.5)
Riding high off an upset win against the Colts, I'm sure the Titans will crash and burn here, but I'm a sucker for teams that score big wins the week before.
Green Bay at San Francisco (5.5)
I think the 49ers have a great shot at winning ... oh who am I kidding, I have no clue. I'm taking the Packers because of that point spread.
(3.5) Seattle at Arizona
I remember when Joe Bugel used to coach the Cardinals, Arizona would start out bad but come on strong late in the season and the "should Joe get fired?" talk would commence. This usually resulted in, "let's give him one more year because his players like him and they're playing hard to keep his job." Well Dennis Green ain't Joe Bugel. Not sure if that's an insult or compliment.
Denver at San Diego (7.5)
San Diego will probably win, but with that point spread I'll take divisional foe Denver.
(6.5) Chicago at St. Louis
I'll go with the Rams at home to make this competitive. I'm still getting flashbacks to the Bears/Cardinals Monday Night game earlier this year.
6:15 p.m.
• We got some more worst things you can do to a Muslim male/female/child. Across the pond, the Muslim Council of Britain announced its demands for banning "un-Islamic" activities in England's government schools.
The funniest thing about all this is that I wanted to single out each offense, but that would have overloaded my quote tag quota for this entry.
• You know, we got predatory lenders after old people, families taking out adjustable-rate mortgages for houses they can’t afford and act all shocked when their rates go up, and now college students unable to get decent loans for their higher learning expenses.
Maybe we are country made up of people too stupid to take care of ourselves. Lord knows we have enough registered Democrats.
• Regarding Danica Patrick’s push of that male driver.
I’ve never had a reason to say anything bad about you, but bitch you better be glad that you pushed him and not me. Great, now the PTI guys are like “Wow, this Danica/Whoever rumble is GREAT!” Yeah, too bad if the pusher and pushee roles were reversed, there would be OUTRAGE~! Hypocrites. Back in my college days, this annoying bitch gave me a push. Guess what? I pushed her back. She was SHOCKED and OFFENDED. Equal treatment my ass. I don't advocate beating the other sex but I do advocate equality.
6 p.m.
• The Michael Wilbon rimjobbing of Gary Sheffield continues today. “OMG a Latino player defended Gary in the Detroit Free Press Today/Gary Sheffield is my hero for speaking out against the Man.” You forgot to wipe some spooge from your chin there, Michael. I know he's your boy and all.
8:30 p.m.
• So this weekend I saw some MSNBC pseudo-“To Catch a Predator” thing that dealt with child sex shops in Asia. Holy Christ was that messed up. Eight-year-olds promising blowjobs you’d like or your money back. Funny thing was they busted some guy from Oklahoma. He was giving the undercover guy there some “tips” on how to get away with banging kids, and when he was confronted on this back in the States (actually, it was Guam but whatever) you could see his face turn pale once he found out he was busted. Anyway, after this show was some “American Runaways” show, where these idiot teens were homeless, despite having ample opportunity to get housing. My favorite was some trans-sexual/gender who got booted out of her government-funded apartment because he/she couldn’t follow the rules. You know, oppressive things like get a job interview, visit a food pantry and not bringing Johns back to the pad for prostitution. And I’m supposed to feel bad for these people?
12:30 p.m.
• So we went to see Ron White last night. Eh. Why the hell were people laughing at material he has already sold on millions upon millions of DVDs? Oh well, if it makes them go home happy, then so be it. Actually, there were several events that happened earlier in the day that made me laugh even more than the two hours I sat at the Benedum Center.
Before leaving for this event, Mrs. kkk and I were watching some house show where several people buy houses and the former owners talk about what they liked about their houses and the new owners talk about all the wholesale changes they are going to do to said living residences. This episode centered around several people from New Jersey. Enough said. Jesus were these people annoying. But what got me laughing was that some of these families were getting their houses and making serious changes to it. I’m not talking about a new carpet here and a new paint job there. This one family totally flattened the second floor to the two-story house they purchased. My question is if you’re going to do this kind of remodeling, wouldn’t it have been easier to just find a different house? This couple bought the house for $500,000 and they had a $150,000 budget to remodel. You know what I would do with a $150,000 budget to make remodeling adjustments? I’d buy a big television, PAY OFF my house and put the rest of the money in the bank. Oh well, it’s not my money.
After watching this show, we left for downtown Shittsburgh for dinner. Mrs. kkk took me to the Hard Rock Cafe – the first time I’ve ever been in one of these. Overpriced food, but whatever. This was her plan. What was funny is that she made reservations so when we got there we only had a 5-10 minute wait. While waiting, there were a handful of groups, ranging from 2-8 that tried to get seated only to be told there was an approximate 30-minute wait. Uh, people, this is a SATURDAY EVENING in one of the more happening parts of an urban center. Do you expect to get immediate seating? The best moment came with the family of 8 learning that there would be a considerable wait and the husband/dad threw his arms up in the air. Yeah, that’ll do something. Jackass. There was another group of young people who must have been doing something homecoming-related that went in and out in a matter of minutes. Seriously, RESERVATIONS. They are your friend.
11:15 p.m.
• Let's see, you could have (see my 1 p.m. entry below for context)...
Ohio State v. USC in the Rose Bowl
West Virginia v. Virginia Tech in the Orange Bowl
Hawaii v. Oklahoma in the Fiesta Bowl
LSU v. Georgia (or Missouri if you'd like) in the Sugar Bowl
Then there would be two semi-final games by the winners of the above-mentioned matchups and then finally a title contest between the final two standing.
Or you could just have LSU v. Ohio State. Yeah, that'll work.
1 p.m.
• Well, it's been a GREAT college football season, and since the anti-playoff queerbos say that a postseason isn't needed for Division 1A college football because the regular seaon is like one big playoff system, then hats off to this year's champion.
The 11-0 University of Hawaii Whatever-They're-Called
I admit it -- I know jack shit about college football. However, I did hear once that there are six BcS conferences. Why can't they just have the champs from each of these six conferences, give a slot to a non-conference team and another bid to an at-large team and have an eight-team playoff? The first round could be your hippie bowl games.
Rose Bowl: Big 10 champ vs. Pac 10 champ.
Orange Bowl: Big East vs. ACC champ.
Fiesta Bowl: Non BcS team vs. Big 12 champ.
Sugar Bowl: SEC champ vs. At large team.
Want to add a few more at-large teams or smaller conference champs? Fine. I don't care. As I said above, I know nothing about college football (among other things). I just spent 5 minutes searching Wikipedia and came up with a better way to determine a champion in big-time college football than what's being done now.
8:30 p.m.
• New job, new likely addition to the family, looks like 2008 is going to be one interesting year. Then again…
Shit.
• So today at work I was called into a staff meeting to go over the new batch of envelopes we all have to stuff. This is awesome. Wednesday could quite possibly be my last full day on the job, and I’m going to spend it stuffing even more mother fuckin’ envelopes.
To make things better, I got an e-mail while I was away from someone I deal with whose project I re-created for her on a larger format because she wanted it to be bigger. I told her that I thought this was a bad idea, but after going through several time-consuming drafts she now tells me that she wants it to be back how it used to look. Oh I can't wait for Thursday (maybe Friday, depending on my mood).
10:30 a.m.
• So it looks like courtneywasmurdered is taking his act on the road. (The video clip can be found via the link.)
Well, if it keeps the kids off the streets and out of trouble, then what's the problem? Besides, I'm sure this is all on the up and up.
• There is some sanity -- in Philadelphia of all places.
This isn't like the "White/Coloreds Only" signs that were plasted in this country a generation or two ago. And, if this article is correct, with the ever-increasing immigrant population sprouting up around this business, if the masses are offended they can go to the other cheesesteak place and drive Geno's Steaks out of business.
7 p.m.
• So on Tuesday I was changing the litter boxes and had this “Jurassic Fight Club” show on the History Channel. So what was the matchup – A T-Rex vs. Triceratops, where my three-horned gangsta would fuck up the world’s uber-predator?
No.
An Allosaurus thinking a nearby Apatosaurus would make an easy dinner, only to realize that this four-legged behemoth would just fall on the carnivore and crush him or drown the meanie if there was some water nearby?
Not even close.
So what was this week’s fight of the week? Finding out who KILLED A T-REX! OK, so there was a bigger dog in the yard, like that abortion called Jurassic Park 3?
Not quite.
It was some carnivore that attacked juvenile T-Rexes. Gay. Oh, and next week the fight club will be a bunch of raptors “gang killing” some herbivore. Bullshit.
Give me an Ankylosaurus cracking the skull of Gorgosaurus. (To this show's credit, something similar will be coming up.)
Give me a Stegasaurs getting its pea-brain pwned by something higher up on the food chain. (To this guy's credit, he seems to be holding his own quite well.)
Give me some horny Hadrosaurs thinking with their little heads and brawling over which one gets to bang the female lizard with the big duck bill.
Yeah, a bunch of raptor things killing some big dumb herbivore. I haven’t seen that before.
Last Christmas the better half, who never knows what to get me for birthdays/holidays/etc., actually did the unthinkable and bought me a BOOK. Blasphemy. I had to deal with these things for the 16+ years of schooling I received – no way do I want to bother with these things some more. But then again, I can’t really blame her for getting me this monstrosity; after all, I am a bitch to shop for. Anyway, this book is titled “Do As I Say (Not As I Do)” and takes aim at limousine liberals who tell us to drive in hippie hybrids while they get around in private jets that consume more fuel in a single flight from Hollywood to Manhattan than I will use in at least a decade’s worth of commuting to and from my place of employment.
Now before my liberal pals start pointing their veggie sticks at me and go, “Yeah, well you conservatives are hypocrites, too,” don’t bother. I’m more than certain that a 250+ page book can be written about “family values” politicians divorcing wives who are battling cancer in the hospital, so instead of giving off more carbon dioxide for the trees, just shaddup. Actually, you might be pleased to know that I find this book a bit under whelming. Golly gee, Mikey Moore talks about RACISM in America but doesn’t hire people of color to work on his films/books/etc.? Color me surprised. Hitlery Clinton talks about the “decade of greed” while profiting heavily from it? Yawn. Ted Kennedy is big on the environment but is not so big on having windmill thingys placed near his Kennedy compound, which would make mother earth happy but not his yachting excursions? Get out. Most of the things in this book have already been addressed on various RIGHT-WING RADIO programs, among other areas of the conservative media. However, if listening to hours upon hours of the EIB Network isn’t your thing, then maybe it’s good to have all these tidbits in one convenient, space-saving publication.
Today I just finished up the chapter on Ralph Nader, and this one really made me laugh. Despite being against Big Business, Ralph has made a few dollars off the stock market with companies that profited from his activism. While reading this stuff was deserving of a few eye-rolls, what made me LOL was the following:
Then I come across this gem:
So I guess the lesson learned here is if GM/Halliburton/Visa/etc. want to avoid the scorn of Ralph, then all they have to do is say that they, too, are a “cause organization.” Of course, in these cases, the “cause” is to make big profits.
I’m about halfway through this read, and most of the big names (insert Mikey Moore joke here) have already been covered. However, Nancy Pelosi is in the on-deck circle, and I’m sure there will be some double standards regarding her “saying” and “doing” of labor practices. However, a few chapters after that is Barbara Streisand, which I’m sure will be a doozy.
KKK’s Top 103 Posters
Number 82: Special K.
I don’t really have much to say about Special K. I see him around; he seems OK enough, case closed. However, what puts him at number 82 on my list is the phenomenon that was his “Hey everybody, I finally got laid" thread. At first everyone was happy for Mr. K and his newfound poon, but as the posts went on, and we all got to learn that he enjoys eating pussy, people began to turn on him.
And now a word or four from the expert panel I have put together to comment on the people I’ve listed.
From EricMM:
From Carnival:
From Lovecraft:
From Black Lushus:
• Once again ESPN is showing its bias toward the heartland of this country. This network pops wood every time the Yankees and Red Sox meet up, and I’ve had it with this preferential treatment. I mean, the Pirates and Royals just wrapped up their inter-league series and I didn’t see a blip of coverage on this clash of the Titans. Ohhhh, Roger Clemens is pitching in Houston again. Fuck that. You can have your “Rocket Returns,” storyline; give me Freddy Sanchez fielding a ball and throwing it to first base. Give me Paul Maholm pitching 4.3 innings while only giving up seven runs. Damn you East-Coast bias.
• Speaking of baseball, here’s the neat thing about the sport. The Chicago White Sox just swept the St. Louis Cardinals. The first two games they won 20-6 and 13-5. The third they won 1-0. You never know what you’ll get with each game. UPDATE: Just heard the Cards accused the Sox of stealing signs for the first two games, lol.
• So I’ve gotten to the last week of April for my MVP 2005 franchise, and I’m really digging playing every game in my organization, from the A-Lynchburg Hillcats to the Shittsburgh Pirates. When I play Madden or NHL’06 I wait until the end of the season to tweak sliders, although with MVP I’ll be doing this every month of the season. The games are realistic for me except for the fact I can’t hit a home run if my life depended on it. For instance, the “slugger” on my Pirates team with one (maybe even two!) dingers is Benito Santiago. However, last night’s win with the AAA-Indianapolis Indians showed me who my newest slugger could be: Pitcher Joe Roa, who last night belted a three-run homer. Oh well, I’ll take any round-tripper I can get. I’m also going to have to tweak the pitching and base stealing sliders a bit, but the lack of home runs are really what’s killing me. Although my games are tilted toward 3-1/5-2 contests, I’ve always been partial to pitching duels rather than home-run derbys anyway.
• One radio commercial that has been annoying me lately are these ads for the Home Depot. The people in these ads talk about how great it’s going to be to get a new BBQ set or some refurbished room. When they list the reasons why this is going to be great, the last, and “most important,” thing they say is, “Best of all, I won’t have to pay a thing for it until 2007.” Yeah, and then when 2007 comes around you still won’t have the money for pay for whatever you purchased and fall even deeper in debt. Just because spending money you don't have works in the public sector doesn't mean you'll be able to get away with it in the real world.
