I discovered this morning that the Nazi bastards in charge of our Internet firewalls here have suddenly decided to block YouTube. Sons of bitches.

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Local TV news legend Marvin Zindler died yesterday from inoperative pancreatic cancer. He’s best known nationally for being the reporter that led the drive to have the Chicken Ranch shut down back in the 70’s, but I’ll always have a soft spot for ol’ Marvin because of his weekly reports on which restaurants around town got busted for health code violations. My brother and I used to watch those with my grandpa when we were kids and would all shout his trademark “SLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIME IN THE ICE MACHINE!” line along with him at the end of each one. Even now, as someone who rarely watches TV news (outside of local weather/traffic in the morning), I always tried to make sure and tune in for that just so I could hear Marvin deliver that line. Good times.

RIP, Marvin.

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Kroger has this promotion where they offer you $0.10 off per gallon of gas (for one fill-up) for every $100 worth of groceries/stuff you buy each month. So yesterday I went to do the weekly Sunday shopping where I pick up the things I need to put together the lunches I bring to work with me everyday. Upon handing me my receipt, the stupid kid running the register noticed that I had accumulated $94 of the next $100. Maybe I was just in a bad mood (likely, since my house was full of in-laws that had shown no signs of leaving any time soon) or he was just new at his first job and was a tad overeager, but this just irritated the hell out of me:

Him: "Look at that. You only need six more dollars to get ten cents off your gas purchase."

Me (indifferent): "Oh, yeah. How about that."

Him: "You want me to hold your spot in line so you can go get some more stuff?"

Me: "For what?"

Him: "So you can get to $100."

Me: "Why would I do that?"

Him: "So you can save money when you fill up!"

...

Him: "Don't you want to save 10 cents on your gas?"

Me: "Not if I have to buy $6 worth of crap I don't need to get it."

Him: "But you'll save WAY more than that when you fill up."

Me: "How? I only buy maybe 20 gallons each time I fill up. That's only like $2 saved; how does that get to $6?"

Him (thinking): "Hmm...I guess it doesn't."

Me (shoving receipt in pocket): "Nope. Can I go now?"

Him: "Have a nice day, sir."