Beach Brawl 2002

[Guest alfdogg]

Beach Brawl theme plays in the background.

 

Narrator: Tonight 3 OaOast titles will be on the line. For the tag team titles...CobainWasMurdered & Some Guy will face off against Generation Never & a mystery partner in a Tire Iron on a Pole match.

 

For the United States Heavyweight Championship, it's EvenflowDDT taking on the man who helped put him on the sidelines for a few weeks...U.S. Champion -- Alfdogg.

 

In our main event, it's 2 out of 3 falls...Caboose defends his World Heavyweight title against the ever so popular and cool, Zack Malibu!

 

Plus, Sandman9000 vs. The Superstar in a Staple Gun Death Match. Anglesault vs. Treble Charged! All that and much more. It's Beach Brawl~!

 

(Pyro goes off as the camera shows the crowd going wild)

 

JR: We're live from the Staples Center! Hi, again everybody -- I'm Jim Ross, standing in the ring with Tony "The Body".

 

Tony: Another big night for many OaOast Superstars, Jim Ross. Every major OaOast title is on the line. I can't wait!

 

JR: Before we start our first match...we'll like to introduce the new head of the OaOast Board of Directors -- former owner of the great Mid-South terrority, which became the UWF, and former Vice President of Wrestling Operations for WCW...please welcome "Cowboy" Bill Watts!

 

"Cowboy" by Kid Rocks hits, as the fans give Bill a mixed reaction.

 

Tony: The boo birds are out in droves.

 

JR: Bill, great to have you in the OaOast.

 

Bill: It's great to be here, Jim. First off, I'll like to thank the folks at home for allowing us to come into your home for this great pay-per-view event.

Now I haven't followed much of the OaOast... (Tony gives Bill a weird look)...but from what I've seen this is the place to be.

I'm even more excited to be in front of the great fans here in L.A. (Crowd pops)

Caboose hasn't arrived in the building yet, so he's been fine $500.

With that out of the way, let's hook it up!

 

OaOast Television Title Match

Reject vs. Masked Mystery Eskimo

 

Gary: The opening contest on Beach Brawl is for the OaOast Television championship.

Introducing first the challenger -- Reject! (Crowd boos)

 

"One of a kind" starts up, and Reject comes to the ring, grinning as he drags a cage behind him. Derek The Fish looks worriedly (or maybe just drunkenly) out between the bars.

 

JR: That isn't right! He's a fish for crying out loud!

 

Tony: Oh, Eskimo should be lucky Reject didn't cook him for dinner.

 

JR: That's wrong.

 

Gary: His opponent, from the depths of the artic, the OaOast Television champion -- the Masked Mystery Eskimo! (Big pop from the crowd)

 

"Ice Ice Baby" plays, and Eskimo sprints out down the ramp, without his trademark sleigh and starts brawling with Reject outside the ring.

 

JR: They aren't going to wait till the bell rings...they're getting it on right now!

 

Eskimo with a flurry of chops which put Reject down, and Eskimo goes to check on Derek, but Reject is back up and smashes Eskimo with his own TV title belt. Reject throws Eskimo into the ring as the bell sounds to indicate the official start of the match.

 

* DING *

 

JR: The match is officially on now.

 

Reject immediately goes for the cover but Eskimo kicks out on 2. Reject pulls Eskimo up and delivers a stiff snap suplex, followed by a leg drop which earns another 2. Reject again drags Eskimo up and tries to set him for his "Fear of Darkn! ess" cradle piledriver but Eskimo fights free and chops away at Reject, rocking him back into the corner. Eskimo with more chops followed by a Killer Whale Plex which scores a two count. Eskimo goes for a Penguin Kick as Reject staggers up but Reject ducks, grabs the leg and flips Eskimo onto his back. Reject quickly hits Rolling Thunder, which gets 2.

 

JR: Eskimo dropping all of his 240 pounds on Reject.

 

Tony: I don't think Reject expected this match to start off this fast paced.

 

Reject climbs to the top rope but Eskimo is up and nails Reject with a flurry of punches. Eskimo climbs up after Reject, who rakes his eyes. The two exchange blows on the top turnbuckle until Eskimo is able to hook hit a belly to belly suplex off the top! Eskimo bounces off the mat hard though, and when he covers Reject is able to get a foot on the ropes.

 

JR: Ref breaks up the pin, as Reject had his foot on the ropes.

 

Eskimo and Reject both stagger up. Reject gets a small cradle for 2, which Eskimo reverses for 2 of his own. Both men spring back up and stare each other down. Reject bounces off the ropes but gets taken down into the FROSTBITE FACELOCK….Reject wriggling to get free….and makes ! the ropes. Eskimo releases him reluctantly before hitting a belly to back suplex and a gutwrench that scores 2. Eskimo with a pair of dropkicks, and then climbs to the top rope.

 

Tony: He's going to the top.

 

JR: High risk move coming up.

 

Reject staggers up as Eskimo goes for a missile drop kick, but Reject with a dropkick of his own to Eskimo's gut. Reject with a short powerbomb on Eskimo, then drags him up and attempts another, but Eskimo wriggles free and hits Reject with a kick to the head, then follows with a Tiger Suplex that gets 2 ½. Eskimo waits for Reject to get up, and spins him around, hitting a BLIZZARD BOMB! 1, 2, - NO! Reject kicks out. Eskimo looks frustrated and stomps on Reject.

 

JR: Eskimo must be asking himself "How do I put him away?"

 

Tony: You pin him that's how.

 

JR: (Sarcastically) Well thank you for your great insight.

 

Tony: No problem, Ross. That's what I'm here for.

 

Eskimo looks at the fallen Reject and heads out of the ring to free Derek. He has the cage door open before Reject comes of the top rope with a flying dropkick that smashes the cage into Eskimo's face! Eskimo is down and out.

 

JR: My God! Think of the fish! For the love of God, think of the fish!

 

Tony: Yeah! Put him in the oven and cook him.

Look at the fish, Ross. He doesn't want to live any longer. (laughs)

 

Reject ignores Derek tugging at his arm and smashes Eskimo again with the cage before throwing him back into the ring. Reject climbs to the top rope and signals for a frog splash, but Eskimo somehow rolls out of the way and Reject crashes to the mat. Eskimo drags himself up using the ropes as Reject gets up and goes for a super kick, but Eskimo grabs his leg and hits a Dragon screw on Reject.

 

JR: The leg isn't supposed to twist like that.

 

Eskimo slaps on a figure four but Reject escapes after less than a minute with a flurry of punches. Eskimo tries for another Blizzard Bomb but Reject turns it into a Scorpion DeathDrop of his own…1…2…no, Eskimo kicks out. Reject goes for the "Lights Out" but Eskimo escapes and drags Reject up, hitting a Falcon Arrow. The impact puts both men down.

 

JR: Both men are down! The ref is starting the 10 count. Whose going to get up first?

 

Reject gets up at 5 and picks up Eskimo. Reject irish-whips Eskimo to the ropes. Reject goes for a clothesline, but Eskimo ducks. Reject puts his head down as Eskimo is running back towards him.

 

Tony: Looks like Reject is going for a back body drop.

 

Eskimo goes for a sunset flip. 1-2-3! That's it! (Pop from the crowd)

 

JR: He pinned him! Reject had no clue the sunset flip was coming.

 

Tony: No doubt he was caught off guard.

 

JR: I agree. It must have been at least a good 10 years since somebodys won with a sunset flip.

 

Tony: Ross, when you can't think of a flashy finish -- go back to the basics....wrestling moves.

 

* DING * DING * DING DING *

 

Gary: The winner of the match and still OaOast Television champion -- the Masked Mystery Eksimo! (Crowd pop)

 

JR: What happens to the fish?

 

Tony: Who cares! I don't know what they'll do with it. Maybe we'll find out tomorrow on IZHD.

 

JR: Fans, take a look at this great offer for ordering Beach Brawl.

 

----Free promotional give-away

For ordering Beach Brawl...send in your cable or satellite bill indicating proof of purchase, and receive an aWo t-shirt. Mail bills to:

 

Beach Brawl Give-Away

P.O. Box 469

Pittsburgh, PA

The OaOast doesn't need a damn zip code!!

 

Please! One request per house hold

 

JR: Let's go backstage with Green Mist and Generation Never.

 

GN: Now, listen to me. I don't like you nor did I choose to team with

you. But, the bottomline is that this a title shot for me, and you happen to be my partner. So, if only for tonight, we'll put our differences aside. Put aside the fact that you hate this country and I'll put aside the fact that you're an idiot....

 

GM: I don't hate this country. What I hate is the faction who

represents it in OAOAST, the aWo. They're a bunch of hypocrites. I have no problem with the country itself. And as far as the title shot goes, the bottom line is that I've got your back and you better have mine.

 

(GM leaves and we return to the arena.)

 

JR: Back to the ring and Howard Finkel.

 

Tony: Finkel? Why not Capetta?

 

Finkel: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a tire iron on

a pole match and is for the OAOAST Tag Team Championship!

 

(Crowd cheers as "Wutai" hits and GM makes his way to the ring.)

 

Finkel: Introducing the challengers-first from Kyoto, Japan,

Green Mist!

 

(GM gets in the ring and warms up as his music dies down. "Nitro" starts up and GN makes his way down the aisle.)

 

Finkel: And his partner, Generation Never!

 

(GN gets in the ring and exchanges nods with GM as his music dies down. The porno stars up and the aWo comes out.)

 

Finkel: And their opponents, representing the aWo, they are the tag team champions, Some Guy and CWM!

 

(The aWo get in the ring and hand over the belts while staring down the opposition. The porno dies down and the match starts.)

 

* DING *

 

JR: Here we go. Tag titles on the line.

 

Tony: This is going to be interesting.

 

GM and SG start it up with a grapple. GM with the advantage into the corner, SG reverses it and hits a Japanese armdrag and another on GM's return. They lock up again. GM takes down SG with a drop toe hold. He looks for an STF, but SG gets to the ropes. SG recovers as GM runs across the ring and comes back with a baseball slide sending SG to the outside. GM runs to the pole and goes for the tire iron. CWM shakes the ropes causing GM to get crotched and fall back into the ring. SG returns and makes the tag. CWM is in and goes to work on GM with chops in the corner and finishes it off with a poke to the eyes. CWM hits an overhead belly-to-belly and ascends toward the tire iron. He notices GM recovering and comes off with a 180-crossbody that GM answers with a kick and tags in GN. GN with stiff shots to CWM. GN with a scoop slam. He goes to the second rope and comes off with an elbow. GN runs and hits a springboard moonsault and covers for 2. GN tosses CWM over the top rope and GM tags himself in. GM waits and runs across the ring and nails CWM on the outside with a sommersault plancha. GM climbs on the apron, waits, and hits an asai moonsault. GM rolls CWM back in the ring. He looks for a stiff kick, but CWM ducks and takes him down into a half crab. GM makes the ropes. CWM drags him to the center of the ring and goes to work on the leg. He goes to the outside and gets a chair. He sets up the Pillmanizer.

 

JR: Oh, no! He isn't, is he?

 

Tony: Why not! Let's hear it snap.

 

GN in with a springboard dropkick and nails CWM with the chair before returning to his corner. Both men are down. CWM makes the tag and so does GM. SG and GN have a punch-fest. SG gains the advantage. He hits a t-bone someplex and follows up with the german somplex which gets 2. He sets up GN for a clothesline, but GN ducks and hits a superkick. GN tags in GM. GM goes straight for the tire iron as SG tags in CWM and SG rolls to the outside. GN follows him and they brawl. GM has the tire iron and jumps down, but CWM pulls out the second tire iron once again. GM ducks the shot, drops his tire iron, and hits CWM with the GREEN MIST~! SG returns into the ring as CWM is still blinded by the mist. He swings for GM, but nails SG. GN clotheslines CWM and both fall to the outside. GM picks up SG and hits the brainbuster. He covers for the

1......2......3!

 

JR: We got new tag team champions of the World.

 

Tony: This has to best considered an upset. Nobody gave Mist & Never a chance.

 

* DING * DING * DING * DING *

 

Finkel: Here are your winners and the NEEEEEEEEW tag team champions, Generation Never and Green Mist! (Mixed reaction)

 

GN grabs the tag belts. He tosses one of them at GM who is recovering on the side of the ring. GN exits with his belt and GM leaves after him.

 

JR: I'm still stunned. I didn't see this one coming.

 

Tony: I agree. A new era of OaOast tag team wrestling begins tomorrow.

 

JR: The staple gun death match is up next.

 

Tony: Oh, man...that's going to be wild.

 

Kelly stands by with BPP outside The Deadly Alliance's lockerroom.

 

KK: BPP, can we go into Caboose's lockerrrom and ask him a few questions about his title defence against Zack Malibu in just a while?

 

BPP: Go for it.

 

::Kevin Kelly looks in the lockerroom sees no one and turns back to BPP.::

 

KK: There's no one in there?!?

 

BPP: Of course there isn't anyone in there! No one has seen him all day!

 

KK: Do you know if he's here at the arena?

 

BPP: If I did do you think I would be talking to you now?

 

KK: So what about tonight's main event?

 

BPP: If I know one thing about Caboose, he'll be here and he'll win!

 

KK: But can you guarantee he'll be here?

 

BBP smiles. Caboose is standing behind Kevin Kelly.

 

KK: What are you smiling about?

 

::BPP's smile gets bigger.::

 

KK: He's standing behind me isn't he?

 

::BPP nods.::

 

KK: Oh @#%$...!

 

::Caboose grabs Kelly and drops him with the Scorpion Death Drop!

Caboose picks up Kelly and throws him into some pipes.::

 

BPP: I knew you'd be here champ!

 

::Caboose stares at BPP.::

 

BPP: What's up champ?

 

::Caboose stares at BPP.

Nervously BPP steps out of the doorway of the TDA lockerroom.::

 

Caboose: I ain't stepping in there, for all I know you got the In-Crowd in there ready to jump me!

 

BPP: Wha...?

 

Caboose: Don't play dumb with me, it was you made the match for the number one contendership between Zack and AS in the first place. It was you made the No.1 contender Battle Royal. It was you who eliminated me from the Battle Royal. It was you who won the Battle Royal. It was you who tried to take my OAOCT World Title from me. It was you who made the BattleBowl match for a shot at my belt. It was you who made the triple threat number one contendership match between AS, SG and AAB. Hold on, AAB isn't he your problem? Are you making me fight your battles as well?

You were meant ot be my friend and my ally! All I see is you trying to cost me this here Title!

 

::Caboose taps the belt on his shoulder.::

 

BBP: But Champ...

 

Caboose: SHUT THE @#%$ UP! I ain't getting changed in there! I'm getting changed somewhere else.

 

BPP: What about tonight?

 

Caboose: Tonight, tonight you show me whose side are you on. Mine? Or the World's?

 

::Caboose walks off. BPP looks confused and worried.::

 

JR: Caboose appears paranoid.

 

Tony: Of course he does. He's the World heavyweight champion. Anybody who wears a championship belt is a mark man. Especially the World champion.

 

----Ad for Intense Zone & HeldDOWN!

 

Is it true? Tune in tomorrow night. Same-OaOast time! Same-OaOast channel! See the aftermath of Beach Brawl~!

 

"The Wall" by Kansas hits and Alfdogg makes his way to the ring.

 

JR: What's he doing here? His match isn't next.

 

Alfdogg: I'm gonna make this short and sweet, because tonight I'm gonna let my actions speak for me in my match with evenflowDDT. You see, the Deadly Alliance is the REAL "In" thing going here right now in the OAOAST. And tonight, after I beat evenflow's ass AGAIN, and after Supershit is turned into a human magnet by Sandman, and after Caboose successfully defends the Deadly Alliance's World title against the Jason Priestly bastard child that is Zack Malibu, and even a bonus as we get to see the All-American Bitch fall at the hands of the Big Poppa, The In-Crowd, the aWo, and each and every one of you idiots will realize...

That the Era of Deadliness...is IN.

 

::The Wall hits, Alfdogg departs::

 

Staple Gun Scramble Caribbean Death Match

The SuperStar vs. Sandman9000

 

Gary: This is the Staple Gun Scramble Caribbean Death Match. A staple gun is in the ring, for either competitor to use. Both men will start on the outside of the ring, as a ten count is administered. At the end of the ten count, both men are allowed to enter the ring. If either man breaks the ten count, he is disqualified and the match is awarded to his opponent. Also, two sides of the ropes have been wrapped in barbed wire, according to Caribbean death match rules.

 

Tony: This is going to be wild.

 

JR: Don't you have problems with Sandman?

 

Tony: No. He had a problem with Tony "The Body" the President of Talent Relations, not "The Body". Now his hate and everybody elses will go to Bill Watts.

 

Gary: Introducing first, a member of the In Crowd -- The Superstar! (Crowd pops)

 

"SuperStar" hits, as James Allen, a.k.a. The SuperStar, makes his way out to the ring. He is carrying a very large stack of In Crowd bumper stickers. He is incredibly pumped up for this matchup.

 

JR: The Superstar looks pumped.

 

Tony: Yeah, we'll see if he still is at the end of the match.

 

Gary: His opponent, the most deathkore wrestler in the OaOast -- Sandman9000! (Crowd boos)

 

"Five Minutes Alone" hits, as Sandman9000 makes his way down the aisle, spitting over the guardrail, into the water. He is carrying a large stack of lightbulbs, about 9 in total, taped together in a 3x3 formation.

 

JR: This match isn't for the weak of heart. You might want to keep your kids away from the set for this one.

 

Tony: What for? The kids today want blood and guts.

 

Both men are positioned on opposite side of the ring, the sides with no barbed wire. Both men place their hands on the apron, and look directly across the ring at each other.

 

JR: Gary is about to start the countdown.

 

Gary & crowd: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...the match begins!

 

* DING *

 

Tony: Here we go.

 

The ring bell sounds as both men slide into the ring. SS is quicker as he is able to grab the staple gun first. Sandman, who got caught up in the ring ropes, elects to slide back out of the ring, as the crowd boos.

 

JR: After Superstar got the staple gun, Sandman got second thoughts.

 

Tony: I would to.

 

Sandman walks outside of the ring, as SS dares him to enter the ring. Sandman tells SS to put the staple gun down, and he will enter. SS agrees, as Sandman climbs onto the apron. However, Sandman climbs down, walks over to the timekeepers' table, and throws in a chair.

 

JR: C'mon! Be a tough guy.

 

Sandman finally climbs into the ring, as the two men square off, from opposite sides of the ring. Sandman decides to exit the ring, but as he is stepping through the ropes, SS runs over and hits a dropkick, knocking Sandman to the outside!

As Sandman stands up, SS hits a baseball slide, sending Sandman crashing into the guardrail. SS picks up Sandman and tries to drop him over the guardrail, into the pool, but Sandman blocks with a thumb to the eye. Sandman bashes SS into the guardrail as well.

 

Tony: Superstar's head went straight into the railing. If he isn't bleeding... no doubt his forehead has become tender.

 

Sandman grabs SS by the head and brings him over to the entrance ramp, where a suplex is blocked. SS whips Sandman into the ring, then hits a big clothesline. SS grabs a trash can out from under the ring, and clobbers Sandman in the head with it. SS tosses both Sandman and the trash can into the ring.

SS climbs into the ring, and hits Sandman with rights and lefts. A SS dropkick sends Sandman into the barbed wire ropes. SS pulls the barbed wire so it traps Sandman's arm in the wire. While Sandman tries to free himself, SS grabs the staple gun. But, before he can use is, Sandman frees himself and dives out of the way. SS comes near him with the staple gun again, but Sandman flees to the outside.

 

JR: Again Sandman goes outside.

 

Tony: I wouldn't blame him.

 

A pissed off SS puts the staple gun down, opens up the chair, and sits down in the middle of the ring. Sandman throws in a table, before climbing back in.

The two engage in a collar and elbow tie up. SS backs Sandman into the corner, before unleashing a vicious chop. He goes for a second, but Sandman ducks out of the way. Sandman hits repeated palm strikes to the chest of SS, before taking him over with a hip toss and a dropkick to the head.

 

JR: Superstar's head, no doubt is hurt after that whiplash effect from the dropkick.

 

Sandman grabs the staple gun, and starts to stomp on SS. Sandman places SS in a chin lock, and shoots him in the forehead with the staple gun! SS holds his head and squirms on the mat, before Sandman again grabs him in a chin lock and shoots him again!

With SS hurt, Sandman brings him over to the barbed wire ropes, before rubbing his face into the barbed wire. SS is down on the mat, bleeding from the forehead. Sandman is in complete control of this match, as he grabs an In Crowd bumper sticker and staples it to the back of SS's head!

 

Tony: [laughing]

 

JR: My God! A In Crowd sticker has been stapled to Superstar's head.

 

Tony: That's great. Now Superstar can go to place where everybody knows his name.

 

SS pulls the bumper sticker out of his skull, as Sandman sets the table up. Sandman comes back over to SS, but SS hits several punches to the stomach of Sandman. Sandman drops the staple gun, which allows SS to grab it, and while SS is still on his knees, staple Sandman in the stomach. Sandman grabs his stomach in pain, while SS stands and staples Sandman in the back of his head!

 

JR: Sandman has been stapled in the stomach!

 

Tony: He didn't know he was having surgery.

 

SS pulls off some of the barbed wire from the ropes, and wraps it around his fist. He punches Sandman in the face, before raking his fist along Sandman's back, cutting his DA shirt to shreds. SS rakes his barbed wire fist along Sandman's bare back, cutting the already tender flesh. SS grabs an IC bumper sticker and staples it to Sandman's back!

 

JR: Now Superstar has branded the In Crowd sticker to Sandman's back.

 

SS grabs the chair, and nails Sandman in the back, which is starting to turn red. Sandman struggles to his feet, only for SS to blast him in the head with the chair, which is dented over Sandman's skull. Sandman falls down and rolls to the outside.

SS follows with the staple gun, and staples Sandman's back two more times. Sandman's back is almost completely red. SS grabs the massive stack of lightbulbs, and as Sandman is on all fours, smashes all nine lightbulbs over Sandman's back! As the massive cloud of dust disintegrates, Sandman rolls around on the outside, screaming in pain, leaving pools of blood on the mats outside.

 

Tony: This is brutal, Ross... and the fans are loving this.

 

SS grabs the bloody Sandman and drags him up the aisle, to the set. Once at the entrance, SS whips Sandman into a palm tree, knocking it over. While Sandman struggles to his feet, SS shoots a beach ball, popping it. SS then staples the deflated beach ball to the arm of Sandman!

 

JR: Now Sandman can use both of his hands to play with both of his balls.

 

Tony: What a bad joke, Ross.

 

As Sandman struggles to his feet SS quickly grabs him and delivers a Star Power II into the piles of sand that makes up the entrance way! Sandman squirms and rolls around in pain, as the sand gets into the cuts in his back! SS picks up the knocked over palm tree and drops it onto Sandman, before DRAGGING Sandman across the sand and into the aisle, leaving streaks of blood everywhere!

 

Tony: The ring crew is going to love this clean up.

 

SS picks Sandman up over his shoulder, before sprinting and hitting the British Bulldog halfway down the aisle. SS leans over the guardrail and splash some water onto his face, before splashing some onto the body of Sandman. SS picks Sandman back up by the hair, leaving a massive blood spot in the entranceway, and drags him back towards the ring.

SS tosses Sandman into the ring, and pulls a kendo stick out from under the ring and tosses it in. SS climbs in and prepares to cane Sandman, but Sandman hits a desperation low blow. While SS is down, Sandman grabs the official's wallet and dumps it onto the mat. Sandman grabs a dollar bill and the staple gun, and proceeds to staple the dollar bill to the cheek of SS! While SS rolls around in pain, Sandman grabs another dollar bill and staples it to SS's forehead!

 

Tony: He's wasting good money.

 

While SS is trying to pull the money off of his head, Sandman begins pulling some of the barbed wire off of the ropes. As SS is standing up, Sandman begins to pistol-whip him with the staple gun. As Sandman reaches back, SS takes him over with a judo arm throw, then takes the staple gun away. After pistol-whipping Sandman, SS puts the staple gun against Sandman's nose, then pulls the trigger, stapling Sandman's nostril to the cartilage! SS does the same on the other side, so that both sides of Sandman's nose are stapled together!

 

JR: This is sick! Sandman's nose has been stapled together!

 

SS picks Sandman up and goes for the Upper Class, but Sandman counters by pushing off, shoving SS into the barbed wire ropes.

Sandman grabs a strand of the barbed wire, then staples it to SS's arm! While SS tries to free himself from the wire, Sandman places the staple gun against SS's lips and shoots, effectively stapling SS's mouth shut! Sandman does it twice more, so that SS has three staples closing his mouth!

 

JR: I don't know how much these guys can take. I don't know how much more I can take.

 

Tony: Don't throw up on me, Ross!

 

SS is finally able to pull the staple out of his arm and free himself from the barbed wire. While Sandman moves slowly, due to the massive blood loss from his back, SS grabs the garbage can and throws it, nailing Sandman in the back of the head! As Sandman rebounds, SS catches him and delivers the Upper Class! SS covers, 1….2…Sandman kicks out.

 

JR: My God! That may have been the first try at a pin.

 

A frustrated SS tries to pull the staples out of his mouth, but gives up. Instead, he chokes Sandman until Sandman opens his mouth. SS grabs Sandman's tongue, and staples it! Sandman is thrashing around on the mat, trying to pull the staple out of his tongue!

 

JR: My gosh! Somebody stop the damn match. This is going too far!

 

Tony: Ross, listen to the fans. They're loving this.

Look at the bright side, Ross. These guys were already ugly, so they aren't going to get an uglier.

 

SS is grinning as best as he can when he places the staple gun against Sandman's EYE, and pulls the trigger. However, Sandman doesn't flinch, or move. SS starts firing the gun, only to see no staples come out! A pissed off SS tosses the staple gun down and grabs Sandman, pulling Sandman up to his feet.

 

Tony: It looks like the gun ran out of staples.

 

JR: Thank God!

 

SS capitalizes by hitting giving Sandman a DDT on the chair. SS then rolls Sandman onto the table. A couple of forearm shots, and SS heads up to the top. SS stands on the top rope, signals for the SuperSplash, which gets the crowd to pop, and leaps off. However, Sandman moves and SS crashes through the table.

 

JR: Through the table he goes!

 

Sandman is able to stand, and drags SS to his feet. Sandman places some of the barbed wire on the ground, lifts SS onto his shoulders in a torture rack position, and drops him head first on the barbed wire with the PSYCHO DRIVAH~! Sandman rolls onto SS with the cover. 1….2…..3! (Crowd boos)

 

JR: Finally it's all over.

 

* DING * DING * DING * DING *

 

Gary: The winner of the match in 14 minutes 49 seconds...Sandman9000! (Crowd boos)

 

The medics come out to check on both men. Both are refusing medical help. However, Sandman grabs the kendo stick and starts to hit SS with it. After five or six blows, Sandman throws the kendo stick down and calls for a microphone.

 

JR: Somebody get him out of here. The match is over.

 

Sandman: Hey! That's one of you motherfuckers down, and two of you motherfuckers to go. And, you motherfuckers don't want to know what I got in store for you. It's gonna make what I did to this @#%$, look like a joke.

 

::Sandman throws the kendo stick down and walks away.::

 

JR: Fans, we apologize for the language used.

 

Tony: We shouldn't apologize.

 

JR: Why not?

 

Tony: Because we're being censored on pay-per-view. Aren't you reading the closed caption?

 

JR: The U.S. Title match is next.

 

Tony: It should be noted -- Alfdogg unified the Hardkore & Intercontinental titles into the U.S. Title by beating EvenflowDDT last month at The Great Angle Bash.

 

JR: That's true. However, Alfdogg had a lot of help from Big Poppa Popick.

Before we go there, take a look at this.

 

----Ad

 

What to have dinner with your favorite OaOast Superstar? Well, now's your chance. Go to your local video store and enter the "Dinner with OaOast Superstar" contest. Must be 18 years or older.

 

Now you can meet and have dinner with your favorite Superstar. Enter today!!

 

JR: I understand Michael Cole is going to try and talk to the challenger for the U.S. title, EvenflowDDT. Michael...

 

(EvenflowDDT is leaving the locker room for his title match with alfdogg when

Michael Cole, mic in hand, stops him.)

 

Michael Cole: Evenflow! Any last words before your match with alfdogg?

 

EvenflowDDT: Last words? Come on MC… you'd think that besides hanging out with us for a couple months, for being on my payroll you'd be my prime support! Sure, I was unable to wrestle GenerationNever on INTENSELY~!HELDDOWN due to a fluke back re-injury, but look on the bright side, the easy night gave me time to focus harder, and because of that re-injury instead of just a hundred percent, or even a hundred ten percent, now I have to give a hundred TWENTY percent tonight to beat alfdogg. The only other thing I have to say is this – in the past, I bought respect. But tonight, for the first time in my life, I'll EARN IT! Wish me luck, MC, I'm off to reclaim my glory!

 

Michael Cole: Uhhh… good luck?

 

EvenflowDDT shakes Michael Cole's hand and smiles.

 

EvenflowDDT: Thanks… as if I need it!

 

"Here Comes the Money" hits and the crowd pops as evenflowDDT and Alison make their way to ringside.

 

Howard Finkel: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is for the OAOAST United States Championship! Making his way to the ring, being accompanied by Alison, the challenger, weighing in at 180 lbs, evenflow D…D…T! (Crowd cheers)

 

"The Wall" by Kansas hits and the crowd boos as Alfdogg runs down the aisle.

 

Howard Finkel: Weighing in at 250 lbs, your defending champion, Alfdogggg! (Loud boos)

 

* DING * DING * DING * DING

 

The bell rings to commence the match as alfdogg and evenflowDDT lock up, but alfdogg knees evenflowDDT in the gut and hammers him in the back. evenflowDDT falls to the ground and moans in pain as alfdogg stomps his back several times, then laughs and taunts the crowd, eliciting quite the negative response. evenflowDDT recovers, however, and gets alfdogg in a school boy for 1…2…alfdogg kicks out, and Irish whips evenflowDDT, clotheslining him to the outside.

 

JR: Outside goes the challenger.

 

EvenflowDDT goes for a Pillow Made O' Concrete, but alfdogg flips out behind him and reverses it into a Russian leg-sweep into the guardrail! Alison winces and gets out of the way as alfdogg picks up evenflowDDT and rams him back-first into the ring and then the ring-post!

 

Tony: That isn't doing any favors to 'Flow's back.

 

JR: No doubt about it. Evenflow has been having back trouble over the last few weeks.

 

Tony: It gives the edge to Alfdogg because not only is he the champion...now he has Evenflow weaken.

 

If your back gives, then your whole body is going to have trouble.

EvenflowDDT screams in pain as alfdogg rolls him back into the ring and covers him for 1…2…evenflowDDT gets a shoulder up. Alfdogg picks him up, and gives him a spinning backbreaker, and another scream is heard as another cover is made, 1…2…2.5, but evenflowDDT kicks out again!

 

JR: Evenflow kicks out! He isn't going down easy. He knows this is for the U.S. title and he knows pride is on the line.

 

Alison cheers on evenflowDDT, and alfdogg is furious, but as he gets up to argue with the ref he's met with a low blow and double leg-screw, which evenflowDDT then transitions into a rolling leg lock. Alfdogg struggles but makes it to the ropes, as the ref forces evenflowDDT to break the hold. evenflowDDT breaks the hold and backs away, but is met with a T-Bone Alfplex of DOOM. Alfdogg covers again for 1…2…evenflowDDT kicks out again, but he struggles to get up. When he does, he is holding his back and has tears flowing down his cheek.

 

Tony: He's crying, Ross!

 

JR: He's in pain.

 

Tony: This guy is supposed to be cool! Cool guys don't cry.

 

JR: Of course they do. We're all human.

Look at Alison. She's in tears. No doubt seeing her man get beat up is effecting her.

 

Tony: Do you want me to hug her, Ross? I'll do it.

 

JR: Not at all.

 

A noticeably distraught Alison has tears of her own running down her face, as the crowd begins the "EVENFLOW!"

chant.

 

JR: You hear it fans. The crowd is behind Evenflow.

 

Alfdogg grabs him for a belly to belly, but evenflowDDT reverses into a jawbreaker and plants his foot in alfdogg's neck for a chokehold, which he breaks at a count of four. Alfdogg Irish whips him again, but evenflowDDT reverses the whip, and catches alfdogg in a Primadonna! The crowd cheers as evenflowDDT locks in a Crippler Crossface, but his back is too weak for him to apply the full amount of pressure and alfdogg escapes.

 

Tony: He didn't get to apply full pressure.

 

JR: If his back wasn't hurt, we would have a new U.S. champ.

 

Alfdogg whips evenflowDDT into a corner, and turns him around, and goes for an Alfkick to the back, but evenflowDDT ducks and grabs the leg for a capture suplex. evenflowDDT kicks alfdogg in the chest and goes for the "Hot in Herre" DDT, but alfdogg reverses into a backdrop. Alfdogg picks evenflow up and goes ol' skool for an Arn Anderson Spinebuster!

 

JR: Shades of 'The Enforcer' Arn Anderson.

 

Tony: And myself. Great spinbuster by Alfdogg. 'Flow's back is probably screaming in pain even more after that.

 

EvenflowDDT is writhing in pain as alfdogg drags him towards the corner, hops over him, and climbs the top turnbuckle for the Five-Star Alf Splash. Alison covers her eyes in fear, but evenflowDDT makes it to his feet and blindly charges the ropes, knocking alfdogg off balance and crotching him on the top turnbuckle. evenflowDDT climbs to the top, and the camera shows him mouthing "It's now or never" as evenflowDDT takes alfdogg down with a superplex! The only thing louder than the sounds of both men hitting the mat is evenflowDDT's sudden scream of pain. Alison resumes weeping, and the crowd is on their feet in tense, dead silence. The ref begins a standing ten count, and as he reaches 6, it's still unclear who the move hurt more, as alfdogg is out but evenflowDDT, despite his struggling, is in too much pain to capitalize...

 

JR: Cover him, Evenflow! You're so close!

Alison is crying a river.

 

Alf gets up first. Alf is going to the top....

 

Tony: Is he going for it?

 

Alfdogg comes off the top with a massive 5-Star Frog Splash.

 

JR: 5-Star!

 

Tony: He isn't done.

 

Alfdogg then flips EFDDT over on his stomach and goes up to the top again.

 

JR: No! Tell he isn't.

 

Tony: Yes he is.

 

5-Star Frog Splash onto the back of a near crippled EFDTT. Alf goes for the pin....

 

JR: 1....2....3! Oh, my!

 

Tony: Alf retains the U.S. title.

 

* DING * DING * DING * DING *

 

Finkel: The winner of the match and STILL OaOast United States Champion -- Alfdogg! (Boos)

 

Aldogg celebrates outside the ring, as Zack Malibu runs out from the back to help his friend up.

 

JR: He tried, but his back gave out on him.

 

Tony: The damage done to his back put him away, Jim Ross. To be honest...I felt Evenflow had a very good chance of winning if he came into the match at 100%. He didn't and he lost.

 

Zack & Alison raise EFDDT's hand near the ramp, as they head backstage.

 

JR: Big Poppa Popick vs. the All-American Boy is next. Their feud started a because of a match one month ago at The Great Angle Bash.

 

Tony: It's Angle-Plex under a mask, Ross. Don't cover for him.

 

The Great Angle Bash

Courtesy of OaOast Home Entertainment

 

Gary: The following contest is the Career vs. Commissioner's Job match!

(Crowd pops) It is set for one fall.

 

BPP nails a swinging neckbreaker and uses his foot to dig into the Gaping Wound in Angle-Plex's head.

 

JR: Ugh! BPP is sticking his foot into the gash in 'Plex's head. That's sick and twisted!

 

Tony: I guess it gives a new meaning to the term "He putting the boots to him", doesn't it?

 

Angle-Plex picks up a bleeding BPP and hits him with a Right Hand so hard it sends blood spattering everywhere.

 

JR: Popick is now a bloody mess. And there's blood on our announce table.

 

AP picks up BPP and places him on the top turnbuckle, then gives him a few knife-edge chops (Crowd Whooooooo's after every one).

 

JR: What chops!

 

Tony: Ross, BPP's chest is turning red like ground meat.

 

....BPP rakes AP's eyes. BPP sets up AP for some sort of piledriver type move....NO! BPP just hit a TOP ROPE TIGER DRIVER!

 

Tony: What a move!

 

JR: GOOD GAWD! GOOD GAWD ALMIGHT! AS GOD IS MY WITNESS, Angle-Plex is broken in half.

 

BPP covers AP, ref goes down to count, 1.......2.......3! (Crowd is stunned) It's over. BPP keeps his job. AP must retire.

 

::The entire aWo run out to help AP back to his feet, as the crowd gives him a standing ovation.::

 

JR: ...what a reaction the fans are giving Angle-Plex. What a career he's had.

 

Narrator: The following night on the Intense Zone, Angle-Plex gave a farewell speech. But Big Poppa Popick got in the way.

 

Courtesy:

The Intense Zone 6-17-02

 

AP comes out from behind the entrance way. He slaps the crowd's hands while he makes his way to the ring. He goes up the steps and into the ring. He raises his arms to all 4 sides of the crowd while they chant "aWo".

 

Angleplex: Well, most of you know that this is my last time ever appearence in the OAOAST....

Now I could come out and here and say that I was screwed, but I figure that if this is my last time here in the OAOAST, then I'm going to be myself and have a little fun...

I had a great career here, and I planned on being here, entertaning you fans night in and night out for a very long time. Well last night all those plans came to a screeching halt when Big Poppa Popick, pinned me right here in the middle of this ring, 1,2,3. Now if I wanted to get my job back, I'm sure as hell I could do it. But if Big Poppa Popick beat me last night, when I knew my career was on the line, that just means one thing. That means that I didn't want it bad enough, to kick out, beat his ass, and pin

him 1,2,3...

Big Poppa Popick was the better man last night, and hell, I earned a lot of respect for him. I'm going to miss all my

 

::AP is interrupted by BBP. BBP stands at the top of the entrance. Moments later, 15 security gaurds run out::

 

BBP: This my show, and you're wasting my time. I beat your ass last night, which means that you can't be on OAOAST TV anymore. So get out of here!

 

::Security surrounds the ring. AP stands there looking at the gaurds::

 

AP: Now all of you assholes may be able to take me down, but at least one of you is gonna be hurt in the process. It could be you. ::Points to a gaurd:: Or it could be you.

 

::Points to another:: So which one of you has the balls to come in this ring and take the risk of getting your ass beat on national TV?

 

::A security gaurd jumps into the ring. AP punches the guard in the face. The guard hits the mat hard. All the other gaurds who were about to enter the ring jump down from the apron. BBP runs backstage.::

 

JR: What the hell is going to happen here!

 

AP continues to stand in the ring looking at the gaurds as the Intense Zone gets back from commercial. BBP walks back out to the entrance. Finally four police officers walk down the ramp. They get in the ring. AP is back in a corner....

 

The officers walk him up the ramp.

 

Narrator: The next week...a masked man jumped over the rail.

 

Courtesy:

HeldDOWN 6-24-02

 

...a man with a mask jumps over the

railing and runs into the ring. He has a microphone in his hand.

 

All American Boy: Big Poppa Popick, I have a bone to pick with you!

You retired me idol, my favorite superstar ever, Angleplex! Now I may

not be under OAOAST contract, but I want you anytime, anyplace! You

may have retired Angleplex, but his spirit lives on through me, the

ALL AMERICAN BOY!

 

::The man runs off back through the crowd as security chases after

him::

 

Narrator: Later that night, the All-American Boy helped BPP win a 15 man battle royal for a shot at the OaOast World Title on next weeks show.

 

BPP and Caboose smile and Shake hands to a HUGE '@#%$' chant. Caboose turns to leave when out of nowhere All American Boy appears and Levels BPP, BPP falls into Caboose who then tumbles over the top rope eliminating himself! BPP WINS! AAB hits the ANGLEPLEX on BPP and leaves. Caboose climbs back into the ring and when the replay is shown he and Popick nearly come to blows!

Winner: BPP

 

In the Back AAB is seen celebrating with the aWo! What does this mean?!?

 

Narrator: After the All-American Boy was seen hanging out with the aWo...many started to belive it was Angle-Plex under the mask.

The next week on IZHD, BPP faced Caboose for the World Title.

 

Courtesy:

The Intense Zone 7-1-02

 

World Title Match

Big Poppa Popick w/Celes (Challenger) vs. Caboose (Champion)

 

...the All American Boy jumps out from the crowd and attacks BPP from behind. BPP tries to fight back, but is unable to counter-punch against AAB's flurry and is forced to cover-up. Caboose is halfway over the guardrail, but turns back and grabs a chair. He aims for AAB and swings, but AAB moves out of the way a full second before Caboose swings. Caboose instead nails BPP in the head with the chair. The official calls for the bell, and awards the match to BPP. Not for the inference of the AAB, but for Caboose's chair shot. The crowd is confused at the decision, and boos.

 

Winner: Big Poppa Popick in 18:15, but still World Champion, Caboose!

Via: Disqualification by Chairshot

 

AAB hops over the guardrail and runs to parts unknown.

 

Narrator: Later on during the main event 8-man tag match between the aWo and Deadly Alliance: the All-American Boy got involved.

 

...the All American Boy makes his way to ringside with a folded up American flag. He nails BPP between the running lights with the flag, as BPP falls to the ground. The AAB then unwraps the flag, and pulls out a brick!

 

Narrator: Then, just last week, the All-American Boy cost BPP his match inside a steel cage against Zack Malibu.

 

Courtesy:

IZHD 7-8-02

 

BPP slowly starts down the cage when All American jumps the rail! AAB grabs Popick and gives him a TRIPLE POWERBOMB…but makes sure BPP's feet don't hit the ground! AAB slings BPP over his shoulders and carries him to the cage door and tosses him back into the cage, where BPP lies unconscious next to Zack. Zack slowly climbs to his feet as does BPP. BPP goes to boot him in the stomach but Zack catches the foot and whips him around…TRENDSETTER!

Zack crawls towards the cage door and with a last great effort falls out of the cage!

WINNER: ZACK MALIBU

 

Narrator: Tonight, these two men will finally meet one on one with the stakes high.

 

JR: I understand "Cowboy" Bill Watts is backstage with Michael Cole. Take it away, Michael.

 

Michael: Thanks, JR. I'm standing here with the head of the OaOast Board of Directors -- "Cowboy" Bill Watts.

Mr. Watts, I understand you have an announcement concerning our next match.

Bill: That's right, Michael. A couple of new stipulations have been added to the Big Poppa Popick vs. All American Boy match. First stipulation is this: The aWo & the Deadly Alliance are barred from ringside. Should any member of either group run-in during the match...the referee would quickly call for a DQ and the member who ran-in would face heavy fines and suspensions.

Second stipulation: If the All American Boy wins, Angle-Plex will be reinstated. (Crowd Pops) With that in mind...let's hook 'em up!

 

Michael: Let's go to the ring and Gary Michael Capetta!

 

Big Poppa Popick vs. All American Boy

 

Gary: Ladies and gentleman, the our next contest is set for one fall with the following special stipulations: If Big Poppa Popick wins, the aWo must break up and the All American Boy must unmask and is banned from wrestling anywhere in the World.

If AAB wins, the aWo gets five minutes alone with BPP inside a steel cage.

As the head of the Board of Directors -- "Cowboy" Bill Watts just said minutes ago, should any member of the aWo or Deadly Alliance get involved in the match...the match will be ruled as a disqualification, fines and suspensions will also be included.

Also, if the All American Boy wins, Angle-Plex is reinstated.

Introducing first, originally from Canada, now living in Boston, Masschusetts, he says he's Angle-Plex's number one fan -- the All-American Boy! (Pop from the crowd)

 

"The All-American Boy" hits and AAB comes out with red, white, and blue fireworks from the stage. He runs into the ring and outstretches his arms…looking up as pyro burns from the ringposts to see the steel cage that BPP might be in later on tonight…

 

JR: Tony, I was talking with the All-American Boy earlier today and I never seen him as focus as he is tonight.

 

Tony: Just look at him, Ross. He must love the fact the aWo & himself will get 5 minutes alone with BPP inside a steel cage.

Back to Capiski~!

 

JR: That's my line.

 

Gary: His opponent, being lead to the ring by Celes, he is the current commissioner of hour 1 on Intensely HeldDOWN -- Big Poppa Popick! (Cheers turn into jeers)

 

"Sandstorm" plays and the Commissioner of IntenseZone walks down with Celes, who has a very worried look on her face, to a mixed reaction from the crowd. BPP has a mic, and of course uses it.

 

JR: What's this loudmouth going to say now?

 

BPP: Now listen, I know who you are All-American Boy, or should I say…AnglePlex (the crowd pops big-time), and I'm being a sport in granting you another match. We both know I won fair and square last time, and this time will be no different, except the OaOasT will be rid of the aWo's influence PERMANENTLY. (Crowd Boos) So, AAB, take off that mask, and let's wrestle…

 

The All-American Boy looks around as the crowd stands on its feet…Slowly, he pulls the mask off…It is ANGLEPLEX! The crowd explodes in cheers as BPP slides under the ropes…The bell rings…

 

JR: It's Angle-Plex!

 

Tony: You act like you're surprised. Everybody knew Anglesault's boyfriend was under the mask.

Doesn't he lose the match for taking his mask off?

 

JR: No. He took the mask off himself.

 

Tony: Yeah, but Angle-Plex is supposed to be retired! How the hell does he get away from that stip?

 

JR: Celes, is taking a seat near the timekeeper. Now that "Cowboy" Bill Watts is the head of the Board of Directors, hopefully he would remove her from ringside.

 

Tony: What for?! A friend of yours takes over a high-ranking job, and all of a sudden you start the ass-kissing!

 

JR: Geez, 'Body', whose job did Bill Watts take over?

 

Tony: Screw you, Ross. Watts wishes he was 'The Body'!

You never answered by question, anyway.

 

JR: Now I can. I just received word from the back that Bill Watts will allow Angle-Plex to compete, but should he lose, he's banned from wrestling anywhere in the World, forever.

 

AnglePlex and BPP walk in circles around the ring as Celes takes her customary seat next to the timekeeper. The two lock-up, but BPP gets whipped out, nailing AnglePlex with a hard shoulder tackle.

 

JR: Shoulder tackle sends Angle-Plex or should I say the All-American Boy, down.

 

Tony: Ugh, looks like Angle-Plex to me.

 

BPP taunts to the crowd, and they boo out of reaction. Angleplex gets back up, and the two start with punches…exchanging rights and lefts, AP gets the best of BPP and nails him with a DDT…quick cover but a kickout! BPP gets up and walks right into a suplex by AP, who holds on to hit two more in succession… AP goes for the cover, but BPP kicks out at 1 again.

 

JR: Three suplexes in a row. The ring doesn't give a bit. BPP's back must be saying "What the hell is happening?"

 

AP up with some chops to the chest, whipping BPP into the ropes…AP comes off with a hard kick, but BPP rolls under and nails AP with a superkick!

 

JR: Ric Flair-like chops. Gosh, you can hear those throughout the Staples Center.

 

Both men take a breather as it takes them a 5 count to recover…BPP with a rake to the eyes of AP, and a whip to the ropes…BPP with a Lou Thesz Press…punches…and the old Austin elbow! BPP goes for his first cover, but only gets a 1 count as AP gets the shoulder up.

 

Tony: Ross, this match just begun, but you can tell both men would like to end this early.

 

BPP throws AP into the turnbuckles and hits him with some hard chops…AP is placed on the top turnbuckle and BPP goes for an Insider's Edge! But AP's feet hang to the ropes..AP flips over BPP and hits a stunner…Quick Cover…almost a 3 count! AP senses this could be the end…signals to the crowd for the Angle-Plex…BPP staggering up, and runs right into the Patriot Missile by Angle-Plex! AP picks up BPP, but BPP with a quick rollup for 2…AP with kicks to BPP's guts for that…BPP down and AP decides to go up once again to the top for the Patriot Missile…but this time BPP is there! BPP hits the ropes as AP gets crotched on the turnbuckle. FINALITY!!!

 

JR: AP won't be having any fun with Anglesault tonight.

 

Tony: The end could be near.

 

The crowd pops loud as BPP looks up…this could be the end…BPP up top for what looks like to be a shooting star press. The crowd is on its feet…as CWM hits BPP from behind with a tire iron…BPP falls down and right into AP's waiting arms…ANGLE-PLEX! 1…2…3!!!!!!! (Huge pop)

 

JR: YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! Angle-Plex won! He's reinstated!

 

Tony: What was that?! He cheated, Ross!

 

Gary: The winner of the match, and now reinstated -- Angle-Plex!

The aWo will now get 5 minutes alone inside a steel cage with Big Poppa Popick.

 

The cage lowers as the rest of the aWo comes out…Celes is distraught on the outside and is being restrained by Bill Watts. CWM brings in his trusty tire-iron, while AngleSault brings in two chairs…

 

JR: Bill Watts is holding back that witch...Oh, my! The aWo are bringing in weapons.

 

Tony: This is going a little too far.

 

BPP looks around, and realizes he's outnumbered…AnglePlex gets a chair from AS, and goes to hit BPP, who moves and kicks the chair into AP's face.

 

JR: BPP moved. AP got a chair right in the face.

 

CWM attacks BPP, but gets thrown right into the cage…BML with a wrapup of BPP, and SomeGuy goes for the SomeKick, but BPP moves, and BML gets SomeKicked!

 

Tony: BPP might get away.

 

But whack! Anglesault nails BPP in the head with a chair. CWM recovers and pulls out two pairs of handcuffs…and the aWo handcuff BPP to the cage…Ange-Plex gets his chair back, and and bloodies BPP with a vicious chairshot. There's another as the 5 minutes ends…but they can't raise the cage because BPP is handcuffed to it.

 

Tony: Why isn't the cage being raised?

 

JR: BPP is still handcuffed to the cage.

 

CWM comes in with a tire-iron shot to the skull, which finally knocks BPP out. Bill Watts calls for officials from the back and wrestlers to help get the cage door off to get in there…AS holds a chair to BPP's face…BML hits a dropkick onto BPP's face.

 

Tony: I've had my troubles with both men, but c'mon. The 5 minutes are up.

 

CWM with a tire-iron shot to the crown jewels of BPP…who is just slumping against the cage…The officials start to enter the cage but are held back by the aWo as AP and AS hit a con-chair-to BPP…Celes is screaming on the outside as the aWo lay in as many shots as they can before the head of the Board of Directors -- Bill Watts, OaOast officials and Tony "The Body" separate them...

 

JR: Bill Watts called Tony into the ring to help clear things up. Wow. BPP may be seriously hurt. No doubt he has a concussion.

 

Medical personnel arrive on the scene and Bill uncuffs BPP, who slumps to hit the mat…Celes comes in and holds the battered head of Popick, who has no idea where he is at.

 

JR: Celes is almost in tears, as her man doesn't know where he is.

I'm being rejoined by Tony.

 

Tony: I'm not a doctor, but BPP probably has a concussion. Looks like he'll need stitches as well.

 

The aWo makes their way up the ramp…too boos…"Cowboy" Bill Watts grabs a mike…

 

JR: Bill Watts has a mic.

 

Bill: That was uncalled for Angle-Plex! All of you, the man could be dead right now! For what? He gave you your match! You got your revenge, but for God's sakes don't cripple the man...He's got family just like you guys.

 

Angle-plex: Hey, "Cowboy", you think we care…Because now you're down one commissioner, and the aWo has the only other one in town…BPP isn't Deadly anymore, he's just dead.

 

JR: BPP is being taken out on a stretcher. Fans, at this time we'll like to tell you about our next big pay-per-view event: Sunday night, October , OaOast presents Apocalypse: The Highway to Hell. The event will take place at Madison Square Garden in

New York, New York.

 

Apocalypse: The Highway to Hell

Sunday night, October 13th

LIVE! Only on Pay-Per-View

 

JR: However, you won't have to wait until October to see our next pay-per-view event. On August 11th, from the SkyDome...OaOast will present our second television special called "Ashes 2 Ashes".

 

The heavyweight championship of the World is next after this quick message.

 

----Anti-drug ad

 

Hi, Kids,

This is former OaOast World Champion and current Superstar and leader of the aWo -- Anglesault. Don't do drugs...they're bad for you.

 

Director heard saying "Cut!" While AS says "Like those little brats won't listen. I get paid $5000, right? Director says "Yeah."

 

Tony: Well, at least he's telling the truth.

 

JR: Anglesault vs. TC is next.

 

JR: Michael Cole is standing by with Anglesault.

 

Cole: Anglesault, tonight, you are finally able to get your hands on Treble Cleft, a man whom you have openly disrespected for months....

 

::AS rips the mic out of Cole's hands.::

 

Anglesault: SHUT THE @#%$ UP, COLE! Now, I know many people think I don't like Treble Cleft. They think I am just MEAN to him. Well, i am here to prove them wrong. In fact, I like Cleft. So much so, that I have written a poem about him. I call it "Ode to Cleft"

 

::AS pulls out a piece of paper and starts reading.::

 

T is for all the little boys you touch

 

R is for the young men you run around with

 

E is for how excited Kiddie porn gets you.

 

B is for the baby oil you use on unwilling participants.

 

L is for your habit of licking genitals

 

E is for what an enormous pedophile you are.

 

C is for how men make you cu... DAMNIT COLE, stop drooling!

 

L is for the lovin' you give to minors.

 

E is for all the erotic positions you take.

 

F is for how "friendly" you are with four year olds.

 

And Finally...

 

T is for the HUGE ASS KICKING I AM GIVING YOU TONIGHT!

 

::AS throws the mic down and walks away.

 

JR: Uh...

 

Tony: What can you say after that interview?

 

JR: Nothing.

 

Anglesault vs. Treble Charged

 

Gary: The following contest is set for one fall.

Introducing first, from Brockville, Onatrio, Canada -- Treble Charged! (Boo)

 

"BRAND NEW LOW" hits and Treble Charged comes out to massive heat and the occasional tossed garbage. TC for once isn't wearing a ridiculous costume.

 

JR: TC looks very serious tonight, Tony.

 

Tony: He has to. This might be his biggest match of his career.

AS keeps talking about TC hanging out with little kids. I think AS has his mind elsewhere, while TC wants AS.

TC grabs a mike and starts to speak:

 

TC: Anglesault, this has gone on long enough. week after you week, you come out here and antagonize me. You even cost me the OAOAST World championship! I DID NOT FOUND NAMBLA!!

But, you see, none of that matters, because at Beach Brawl, I'm going to end this little feud of our's once and for all. You know why? Because I've got an ace up my sleeve, something you'd never expect. So, AS, all I can tell you is to watch your back, because I'm bringing everything I have, plus something more...

 

JR: What does he mean by that?

 

Tony: JR, I saw TC and Caboose talking backstage earlier today. TC gave him a lot money...and it wasn't any of that play-Canadian money either!

I bet you anything TC put a bounty on AS.

 

JR: You may be right.

 

"BORN IN THE USA" plays and Anglesault comes out to a MONSTEROUS Ovation.

 

Gary: His opponent, representing the aWo, from New York, New York -- Anglesault! (Big pop)

 

JR: What a reaction the leader of the aWo is receiving.

 

Tony: Well that's great. His boyfriend Angle-Plex is back. So AS must be happy.

 

JR: These men aren't wasting their time.

 

* DING *

 

The bell rings and TC immediately goes for a spear but AS blocks and hits a Twisting DDT. Sault goes for the SALT AND PEPPER but TC makes it to the ropes and begs off. They lock up and TC grabs a arm lock. AS powers out of it and whips TC into the ropes and backdrops him to the canvas. AS picks him up and hits a vertical suplex. He drops a few elbows to TC's sternum and climbs the ropes. He goes for the SALTSAULT but TC rolls out of the way in the nick of time. TC grabs a dazed Anglesault and hits the RED PLEX! 1…2…NO!

 

JR: TC only gets a two count.

 

AS kicks out at the last possible second. TC whips Sault into the corner and puts him on top of the turnbuckle. As this is going on CobainwasMurdered makes his way to ringside and sits down at the announce table.

 

JR: CWM! What are you doing out here?

 

CWM: I'm here to make sure that TC doesn't try anything funny. It's my job, why don't you do your job and call the match?!?

 

JR: You're intense tonight, aren't you?

 

Tony: Of course he is, Ross. He lost

the tag titles earlier tonight.

 

In the ring TC goes for a Superplex but Sault pushes him of the turnbuckle and follows up with the SALTSAULT 1…2…NO! TC got his foot on the ropes! AS whips TC into the ropes but TC reverses he hits a Side slam and then while Anglesault is dazed he locks on the SALT AND PEPPER! Oh the Irony!

 

JR: BY GAWD! TC is using AS's own move!

 

CWM: Excuse me JR, I have some business to attend to.

 

Anglesault is struggling towards the ropes, he's inches away from the ropes when CWM jumps up on the apron.

 

CWM: RING THE FUCKIN' BELL! RING THE DAMN BELL! RING IT DAMMIT!

 

JR: What the hell is going on?

 

Tony: I'm confused.

 

JR: You aren't the only one.

 

* DING * DING * DING * DING *

 

The Ref immediately calls for the bell just as Anglesault grabs the bottom rope. A shocked and disgusted Anglesault spits on CWM. CWM tells TC to get the hell out of the ring and they hightail it as Anglesault throws a fit in the ring. The fans look like they're going to riot.

 

Gary: The winner of the match...TREBLE CHARGED!

 

JR: BY GAWD! CWM IS SATAN! And we aren't anywhere near Montreal! This was sick and twisted! WHY CWM WHY?!?

 

Tony: The fans look like they're going to riot.

If they do, hopefully they go after you.

 

JR: We need to get this under control. The World title match is next.

 

Gary: Ladies and gentleman, the following contest is for the OaOast World Heavyweight championship. The match is set for 2 out of 3 falls. In between falls, a 30 second rest period will take place.

 

OaOCT World Championship Title Match

Caboose (Champion) vs. Zack Malibu (Challenger)

 

Gary: Introducing first, the OaOast World Heavyweight Champion -- Caboose! (Crowd boos)

 

Tony: Capetta is going to get a beating from Caboose, Ross. Doesn't he know it's now the OaOCT title?

 

JR: Who cares?!

 

"This Means War" hits and Caboose makes his way out proudly displaying the newly dubbed OaOCT World Title. Dressed in all black...Caboose is illuminated with a white spotlight as he