Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted May 4, 2007 MUSIC VIDEO LOGO! The resounding sound that marks the end of our theme song is washed away by the frantic roar of the Little Rock crowd, all eighteen thousand desperate to lay their eyes upon the majestic sight of the OAOAST's gladiators. Laid in front of the view is a splendid arrangement of orange, yellow, and red fireworks, wreaking a controlled havoc to match the audio chaos. The cameras dart around the stands, showcasing fans who's signs and foam fingers reach towards the heavens above. Once that concludes we avoid our customary introductory spiel by the announce team and cut to the action! "JUST ONE ON ONE THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT BABY! JUST ONE ON ONE, THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT! JUST ONE ON ONE THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT BABY! JUST ONE ON ONE, THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT!" "First To Believe" by A1 thumps through the arena to the traditional reaction of wild, girlish screams from the crowd. But for once it's a solitary entrance as Shayne Brave walks to the ring alone and not all that cheerfully, despite his bright and sunny orange denim outfit. Shayne manages to find it in him to tag a few hands on his way down the aisle get other than that he's distinctly glum. BUFFER The following contest is a BLINDFOLD MATCH, scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Detroit, Michigan. He weighs in tonight at one hundred and eighty two pounds... one half of D*LLLLUUUUUUUUXXXXX... this is "SHOWTIME" SSHHHAAAAAAYYYYNNEEEEE... BBRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAVVEEEEEEE!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE And as you can see, Shayne Brave coming alone tonight... COACH LOL! COLE ...very mature, Coach. All outside parties have been banned from ringside here tonight to prevent any outside help in this Blindfold Match and of course, Jade Rodez wouldn't be by Shayne's side anyway. But not Tyler Bryant with him, Shayne is going to have to rely on this Nebraska crowd to guide him tonight. COACH Poor guy. COLE Boy you're a riot tonight, huh Coach. Shayne slides into the ring and immediately finds himself confronted by referee Mike Chioda, brandishing a pair of black hoods. Not looking altogether convinced about this idea (and who can blame him, really?), Shayne stoops down and allows the blindfold to be put on... "BREEEAAAK!!" ...while "Tear Away" by Drowning Pool hits and the good feeling around the arena drains out the front door. Emerging through the sliding entrance doors comes Christian Wright, carrying his trusty black briefcase incase of any urgent paperwork that should arise during this match. Wink wink. Straightening up his fancy red polyester jacket with a big smile on his face, Christian strolls down the aisle with his head held high in the face of all the derisory and in some cases, frankly grotesque signs being brandished at him BUFFER And, his opponent. Now residing in Washington, D.C... weighing in at eight and one-third BARS of GOLD! He is the Chief Financial Officer for THE ENTERPRISE... "THE NATURAL" CCHHHRRRRRRIIIIISSTTIIIIIIAAAAAAANN WWRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIGGHHHHHTT!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Wright sets his briefcase on the top step of the ring steps and removes his jacket, biding his time as referee Chioda keeps the as-yet not blindfolded Shayne Brave back. "WOO - DY!" "WOO - DY!" "WOO - DY!" "WOO - DY!" COACH What the hell are these rednecks chanting Woody for? COLE Well, I believe they're referring to Christian's little friend, who of course joined us briefly at AngleMania. COACH Now, why would they do that? Hasn't the man suffered enough!? COLE Evidently not. With his face turning red from a combination of embarrassment and rage, Wright paces on the outside, yelling at the Omaha crowd to pipe down. Which of course doesn't work. So Wright smartly gives up on the crowd and slides into the ring, demanding that Chioda hurry up with the blindfolding of his opponent. Chioda first ensures The Natural is safely in his corner, before going back over and lacing up the rope tie on Shayne's blindfold. "WOO - DY!" "WOO - DY!" WRIGHT SILENCE! "WOO - DY!" "WOO - DY!" COLE This may well be a first in OAOAST history. COACH And not a good one either! I hope it doesn't catch on, that's all I can say. COLE I was talking about the Blindfold Match... COACH Oh, yeah, that too. With Shayne dealt with, Chioda now walks back over to Christian with the second blindfold and gestures for him to put it on. Wright seems pre-occupied with the crowd still, ignoring Chioda's demands to put on the blindfold. Eventually the referee does foist the hood on Wright though... only for The Natural to just hold it in his hand dumbly. "HANG ON A SECOND!" COLE What the... "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" All of a sudden, the crowd's attentions turn to the entrance way, as THEODORE MONEYMAKER appears with microphone in hand, wagging his finger in the direction of the confused referee. Jade Rodez is at Moneymaker's side, scowling a little but showing no real signs of emotion. MONEYMAKER I think there's been some sort of a misunderstanding here. "AAASSS - HOLE!" "AAASSS - HOLE!" "AAASSS - HOLE!" "AAASSS - HOLE!" MONEYMAKER And if you common inbreds would just shut the hell up, I'd be glad to explain! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" MONEYMAKER Luckily, Jade Rodez alerted me to the error, having of course signed off on the contract for this match. The contract which, apparantly, the incompetent officials of this company neglected to properly read. See, this IS a Blindfold Match. But, it never said that BOTH competitors would be wearing blindfolds. COLE Oh no... Following the direction of the voice, the protesting Shayne lumbers his way across the ring... ...little realising that Christian has tossed the second blindfold away and is now creeping around behind him. MONEYMAKER The rules of this match state that only whichever one of those manufactured nobodies it is under that hood needs to wear a blindfold. And as you nickel n' dimers know, The Enterprise ALWAYS follow the rules! So, now that that has been cleared up... Right on cue, Wright sneaks up from behind, just as Shayne realises he's in trouble and tries to untie his blindfold. But he doesn't get there in time, as Wright CLUBS him down with a brutal clothesline to the back of the head!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH OH! He blindsighted him! HAHA! *DINGDINGDING!* Referee Chioda is left with no choice but to call for the bell, as Wright leaps up and puts the boots to the fallen Brave amidst a venomous response from the crowd. Moneymaker can be seen in the background laughing at the top of his lungs on the stage watching all this while Jade remains pretty much emotionless next to him. Pulling Shayne off the mat, Wright lays into the blindfolded boybander with a European Uppercut, sending him staggering across the ring! And a second! Shayne hits the turnbuckles and comes darting out, not sure of what exactly he just hit, past Wright who follows after him with a third European! COLE This is bull! I guess we should have known The Enterprise had something up their sleeves, but this is ridiculous! It wasn't enough to force D*LUX into a Handicap Match last Saturday night... Blindfold Match my ass, this is a mugging! COACH You heard Teddy, they're just following the rules. COLE Rules they made up! COACH The benefits of being rich. As Wright backs away, Shayne suddenly finds himself completely isolated in one corner of the ring. Shayne reaches out and starts to fumble at the air in front of him, trying to reach out for anything or anyone to tell him where he is and where his opponent is. That'd be an okay strategy in a normal Blindfold Match. In a Blindfold Match where your opponent isn't blindfolded, it's just making yourself a sitting duck. "LET'S GO SHAYNE!" "LET'S GO SHAYNE!" "LET'S GO SHAYNE!" "LET'S GO SHAYNE!" Not particularly helped by the crowd, Shayne wanders out into the centre of the ring and into a boot to the gut from Wright. Wringing out the arm, an irish whip then follows from The Natural, setting Shayne up... ...for nothing as it turns out, Shayne unable to see the ropes coming and bouncing harmlessly off them chest first. Wright is left standing dumbly as Shayne collapses to the canvas, pulling himself right back up but finding himself even more lost than before. COLE Shayne should just pull the blindfold off now and be done with it. COACH Ah, but that's not following the rules. And we all know you how you love to preach about certain people and their respect for the rules, Mikey. Shayne now looks for the help of the fans in telling him which direction to turn. To their credit, the people of Omaha manage to convey to Shayne just by 'NOOOO's and 'YYAAAYYY's that he should turn around. Unfortunately, they don't convey to Shayne that Christian Wright is right behind him and set for a Superkick. *SMACK!* "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH HE DIDN'T SEE IT COMING!! COLE Oh brother. You've been saving these up all week, I bet. COACH Well, it beats doing a real job. COLE Amen. Shayne's head SNAPS back from the completely unexpected kick and he flies back into the ropes, the lower two bouncing him back and saving him from spilling out to the floor. In hysterics on the stage, Moneymaker claps his hands in glee before giving the "money fingers" to Christian when he looks to the stage. Wright returns the gesture, as all the while Shayne lies motionless on the canvas. "C - O - D!" "C - O - D!" "C - O - D!" "C - O - D!" COLE This crowd want the World Tag Team Champions to end this massacare. But, I'm not so sure they're even here tonight! COACH They probably saw the word Arkansas on the schedule and ran in the opposite direction. The chants begin to fade out when the Princesses Of Penis Pain fail to answer their cries, all the to the amusement of Moneymaker on the ramp. Back in the ring, referee Chioda is trying to convince Wright to end this beating. But it barely even registers with Wright as he brushes the referee aside, pulling Shayne up by the blindfold and turning to the entrance way. From there, Moneymaker shrugs his shoulders and tells him to "go ahead", which is the only real signal that will put an end to this. Wright sets up for a suplex, hanging Shayne's ankles across the top rope and leaving him hanging for a couple of drama-enducing seconds, before twisting to the side with the CONVERSION RATE!! COACH CHA-CHING! Dragging the limp boybander away from the ropes, Wright hooks the leg... 1... 2... 3!! *DINGDINGDING!* COLE And, mercifully, it's over. Chioda wastes no time with the count and raises Christian's arm in a token gesture, before making a move to remove the blindfold from Shayne's head. Meanwhile, heads turn to the aisle, as Moneymaker is on his way to the ring with Jade in tow! BUFFER Your winner of the match... CHRISTIAN WRIGHT!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Applauding as he climbs the steps, Moneymaker dips into the ring and holds the ropes for Jade... before PUTTING THE BOOTS TO SHAYNE BRAVE!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh come on... enough is enough! You've aready beat the kid, what more do you have to prove damnit!? As Chioda finds himself flung out of the way, the beatdown resumes as Christian adds his boots to the equation! Jade watches all this from a far-away corner, showing no signs of compassion for her former charge as he gets the bejeezus kicked out of him by The Enterprise duo. All the time Moneymaker howls with laughter, until suddenly the crowd erupt, due to the arrival of "TREMENDOUS" TYLER BRYANT at full speed down the aisle!! Tyler slides headlong into the ring... but slides too fast and too far in his exuberance! And by the time he scrambles to his feet, Moneymaker is waiting on him with a Lariat from the left side, clubbing Tyler down and setting the other D*LUX member up for a stomping! COACH Well, so much for the cavalry! Moneymaker and Wright stomp away on Tyler now, with Shayne both physically unable to help and unable to even see what's going on with the blindfold still over his head! COLE This is ridiculous! The Enterprise, trying to systematically destroy D*LUX... and for what!? What did D*LUX ever do to deserve this!? Not a thing! COACH They stood in the way of progress, that's reason enough. COLE That's a crock of... WAIT A MINUTE!! The crowd again rise to their feet, as more help is on the way. And this, it's in the form of KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN and ALIX MARIA SPEZIA, the OAOAST World Tag Team Champions running to the ring armed with CROQUET MALLETS!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" In the middle of their kicking, Christian notices the eruption from the crowd and the vengeful women charging their way, quickly alerting Teddy before bailing out of the ring! Moneymaker bails out too, just in time as Alix and Krista come in swinging, narrowly missing Moneymaker with the mallet! In all the chaos, Moneymaker and Wright don't even seem to notice that they're one short, frantic to get the hell out of dodge as Krista and Alix suddenly notice Jade Rodez, trapped in a corner like a dear in the headlights! COACH Oh no... Alix's ADD draws her away from the really juicy confrontation and to D*LUX, checking the two boybanders are still breathing. Meanwhile, Krista and Jade come face to face, Jade trying to stay composed but her eyes telling a different story. Christian can be seen contemplating making a move to save her, but Moneymaker holds him back, noticing that Krista has stopped in her tracks. Dropping the unorthodox weapon in her hands, Krista just looks at Jade. A long, awkward look. (You know where you've kind of got your mouth partially open, head cocked to the side, eyes water, as their lids try to flutter away the sight of person who hurt you so bad. Patty knows. Thanks Patty!) Realising that her former mentor has no intentions of hitting her, cautiously Jade begins to leave. She doesn't take her eyes off of Krista, just incase, until she makes it through the bottom rope to the floor, at which point she turns her back and simply walks away. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Wow... was that... compassion from Krista? COACH First time for everything I guess. "Money Talks" plays through the P.A again as Moneymaker, Wright and now Jade leave. COD look on, daring them to stay and fight, as D*LUX start to drag themselves back to life around them. COLE D*LUX taking a beating here tonight but one thing is for sure, if not for Chicks Over Dicks' intervention, it could have been a lot worse. Thank goodness they arrived when they did. COACH And thank goodness they managed to get those croquet sticks through customs. Cause you know Arkansas ain't cultured enough for them to have bought them here. COLE Did you just say croquet sticks? COACH Uh......gotta go! COMMERCIALS!! COLE Welcome back to HeldDOWN~!... where, before the break, we saw the quote-un-quote Blindfold 'Match', which turned out to be not so much a match as a beatdown at the hands of Theodore Moneymaker and Christian Wright. Thankfully Chicks Over Dicks were on hand to run The Enterprise off and during the break, one of our many hidden cameras picked up this... **DURING THE BREAK** Still wielding their croquet mallets, Alix Maria Spezia and a visably shaken-up Krista Isadora Duncan have made it through the 'go' position on their way back to their locker room and more importantly the free-bar mandated by their contracts (P.S. Krista likes to drink!). However, their progress and their inevitable hangovers are hampered momentarily as D*LUX drag themselves through the curtains behind them. KRISTA Oh... yeah, you guys. I told you we forgot something. Well, actually, I told you we forgot something important, I guess I was half right at least. No offence meant, it's just nothing feels all that important to me right now. Life itself doesn't seem the great, incomprehensibly complicatedly crafted gift from above some people believe it to be. So, anyway, sorry for leaving you. ALIX Slaps forehead. KRISTA I agree. But, isn't that really more of an action than a piece of dialogue sweetie? Shouldn't you have actually slapped your forehead? ALIX Wouldn't that hurt? KRISTA Good point. *slaps forehead* There. Much better. D*LUX look a little disturbed for a moment at the self-abuse being dished out to Ms. Duncan by Ms. Duncan, before realising they should talk advantage of the lull in talking while they can. SHAYNE Miss Krista, we wanna thank you helping us. For a moment, I wasn't sure anyone was going to save us. ALIX Well, we would have swooped to your rescue sooner, but we let Team Jamaica borrow our croquet gear so we had to take a detour. KRISTA Listen dumplings, your buddy Leon might be a spineless dweeb who's to afraid to fight when a battle comes a knockin', but my spine was voted the 3rd hottest in the entire world and I'll be damned if I'm gonna let it go to waste! Plus, am not a dweeb. I don't even know what that means. Infact, I've never even heard that word before. Trust me, if you need someone to rely on in the field of potentially and Buddah-willing one day successfully castrating Theodore Moneymaker, look no further than Chicks Over Dicks! Brushing aside their considerable anguish, the boybanders perk up with excitement at Krista's somewhat vulgar offering of assistance. SHAYNE Oh, we surely won't! Nobody kicks BUTT liked you do. TYLER And by the way, thanks for not hurting Jade when you had the chance. That was really noble of you. Krista scoffs. KRISTA Trust me, I didn't do it for you and I sure as sugar didn't do it to be 'noble'. TYLER Well, whatever the reason, thank you. An awkward pause follows, as Shayne begins to gather the requisite amount of courage needed to extend an invitation to the former beauty queens. SHAYNE And, if you ever want to talk about your feelings with us, we'd love to lend an ear to you and listen. And...well, maybe, perhaps write a song about it. ALIX KRISTA (dryly) I'll keep that in mind. Now, if you don't mind, I have an appointment with my friends Jack Daniels and Joe... uhm, Joe Vodka? Look, I'm gonna get drunk, okay. Badda bing badda boom, I'm out. And with that Krista and Alix, with a swoop of her imaginary cape, leave and we return to Sofa Central! COACH Yeah, extra anchovies... huh? We're on already? (hangs up cellphone) That was the shortest COD promo in history! COLE You're not kidding. Cole finishes painting his final toenail before tucking his boney legs back under the announce table. COACH Green? Ew. COLE Shut up. While I share Coach's sentiments and violently vomit all over my keyboard, and try in vain to suppress my rising homicidal urges plz enjoi this video The (TV) screen goes black, and the following appears on the screen. The following announcement was paid for by World Domination Wrestling. Soft music accompanied by wind instruments plays, and a spotlight slowly raises over an all black wrestling ring with red ring ropes. (voiceover) In the beginning, the land was pure. Even in the early morning light, you could see the beauty in the forms of nature. Head shot of Alfdogg looking off into the distance. Soon men and women of every color... Shot of an Asian man doing martial arts poses in the shadows. And shape... Shot of an overweight tattooed man wearing colorful clothing. Would be here too. And they would find it all too easy sometimes not to see the colors... Shot of Chris Stevens smashing said tattooed man from behind with a mirror. ...and to ignore the beauty in each other. Shot of Alf delivering a beltshot to CWM. But they would never lose sight of the dream. Head shot of Stevens looking off into the distance. The bitter world that they could unite... Head shot of Axel staring off into the distance. And build together...in Triumph. As the last line is spoken, a camera shot from the ground is shown with a red tint, with Rick Heyross, Alfdogg, and Axel standing left to right and looking down into the camera smiling. The screen then fades into another announcement. World Domination Wrestling presents: WDW Triumph Coming Saturday, June 2 Can You Feel It? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted May 4, 2007 (edited) After the WDW hype machine shuts down for the night, the view returns to that of the legendary announcer, Michael Buffer, positioned within the ring, surrounded by a murmur of anticipation from the capacity crowd. BUFFER Wrestling fans, the following contest, sanctioned by HI-YAH Promotions and the OAOAST, is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the HI-YAH tag team championship! Fall Out Boy’s “Thriller” hits and the crowd goes crazy, bringing a smile to Melody Nerdly’s face as she leads her terrific twosome to the squared circle. BUFFER First, the challengers…from San Antonio, Texas, totaling 497 pounds, JOCK MULLIGAN and BARON WINDELS…THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGERS! And they are accompanied everyone’s favorite gal pal MELODY NERDLY! “YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!” The guys hand Melody their accessories and go through their last minute routine as they await their opponents. COLE A reminder, ladies and gentlemen, this bout is being contested under HI-YAH rules. Instead of the traditional 10 count there will be a 20 count, and throwing your opponent over the top rope is an automatic disqualification. Now back to Michael Buffer. Easy lover She'll get a hold on you believe it Like no other Before you know it you'll be on your knees The soothing sound of Phil Collins' "Easy Lover" fills the air as Rico de Janeiro swaggers onto the stage stroking his 70s porn ‘stache. “Sweet” Lucius Soul pops out behind him, puffing out his afro. BUFFER Their opponents and champions, weighing in tonight at a total combined weight of 410 pounds, RICO DE JANEIRO and "SWEET" LUCIUS SOUL...THE MARDI GRAS HHHOOOOMMEEWRECKING CREW! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The always confident pair are even more so now that they hold the HI-YAH tag team championship. Once inside the ring, referee Charles Robinson asks for possession of the titles. Rico and Lucius oblige, but not before Soul gives his belt a French Quarter kiss! COACH How can you not love those guys, Cole? COLE Simple. They’re arrogant. And home wreckers! It’s the very reason they’ve gotten themselves in hot water with the Heavenly Rockers. Rico made unsolicited advances towards Logan’s wife Holly-Wood and to say he’s pissed would be an understatement. Thank goodness the Lone Star Gunslingers were there for Holly. Who knows what Rico would’ve done had they not shown up. COACH Oh, please. Haven’t you ever heard of supply and demand? Besides, Holly’s the one who started flirting with Rico. She’s obviously playing hard to get with her combative attitude. Of course you wouldn’t know since you’re from Venus. * DINGDINGDING * Rico de Janeiro and Baron Windels get things going for their respective teams, and Rico starts off strong by utilizing a Greco-Roman knuckle lock to cheap shot Baron, kicking the 6’7” Texan in the gut. Doubled over, Baron is staggered by a series of blows to the face. Looking to strike big early de Janeiro whips Windels into the ropes to deliver his patent running high knee, but Baron ducks and lands a flying lariat on the rebound! ONE… Baron rises up as he spots Lucius coming in and backdrops the Louisiana native. Soul finds himself in the wrong side of town, face to face with Jock Mulligan. Big right hand sends Lucius stumbling back towards Baron and a hip toss…onto Rico! Rico is then sent off for the ride and back dropped. A tag is made and Jock Mulligan officially sees action for the first time tonight, connecting on a MISSLE DROPKICK! COLE That ought to please Melody. She’s been asking the Gunslingers to incorporate more high-risk moves into their matches for awhile now. COACH There’s only one person who can please Melody, and that’s Rico de Janeiro. COLE Why did I know you were going to go-- Here’s the cover! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Irish whip, but Rico counters and Lucius pulls down the top rope, causing Jock to tumble outside. Soul harasses Baron inside while Rico goes to work on the floor, lifting Jock onto his shoulder before dropping him face-first on the steel steps! The sickening thud that follows grabs the attention of the referee, who immediately orders de Janeiro back in. The damage done Rico has no problem going along with the request. He rolls Jock in and tags out. Lucius swings inside onto the middle turnbuckle and delivers a picture perfect elbow! ONE… TWO… THR-- NO! Jock barely gets the shoulder off the mat. Rico returns and successfully executes a gut wrench suplex, popping right up to stroke the ‘stache and drop the big leg! COACH Porno 'Stache Leg drop! ONE… TWO… Rico’s lackadaisical cover, which is simply his leg across Jock’s chest, isn’t enough to keep the Texas Twister down. Melody leads the crowd in urging Jock on as Baron shouts words of encouragement from the apron. “LET’S GO JOCK!” “LET’S GO JOCK!” “LET’S GO JOCK!” Following a tag, Jock is slammed and then crushed by a pair of elbows from the Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew. Rico then assists “Sweet” Lucius Soul on a STANDING MOONSAULT! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Soul gets down with his bad self before firing Jock into the corner, charging in after and smashing the flat of the boot into the jaw of the Texas Twister. What happens next is the biggest insult to the state of Texas since the time Ozzy Osborne pissed on the Alamo, as Lucius plants Jock into the canvas with a BULLDOG! BARON MELODY COACH That’s the best Bulldog I’ve seen in all my years in this great sport, Cole. Look at Baron and Melody. They’re envious right now. COLE Envious?! Disgusted is more like it. ONE… TWO… Still fuming over the use of the bulldog, Baron breaks up the count and lets loose on Lucius. As he’s restrained by the official Soul and de Janeiro swap places. Questioned by the zebra Rico denies any wrongdoing and puts the boots to Jock. The Texas Twister develops a sense of urgency as Rico lifts him overhead, worming out of a body vice or attempted Moustache Ride and locks on… “YYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” …THE IRON CLAW!! Amazingly, Rico manages to grab a side headlock out of sheer desperation but is quickly pushed off into the ropes. A notorious ladies’ man, even lady luck is charmed by Rico de Janeiro, the King of Mardi Gras somehow able to make the blind tag as he bounces off the near side and is driven into the mat courtesy of a real Texas BULLDOG by Jock Mulligan! COLE Bulldog! He got him with the bulldog! But Jock didn’t see the tag. He has Rico pinned for at least a 10 count but a tag was made! Unaware of what has happened the Gunslinger complain to referee Charles Robinson, who does his best to explain the situation. Even Melody gets in on the act, jumping on the apron to protest. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” The crowd reacts as Lucius sneaks inside with the tag title in hand. Soul believes he has a clear shot at Jock when… “YYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” …LOGAN MANN shows up and rips the belt out of his hands! LUCIUS Wagging his finger in Soul’s face Logan is blindsided by Rico. The crowd erupts again as SYNTH makes his presence felt, evening up the odds. As the bodies start to fly the referee notices the mayhem going on behind him and calls for the bell. * DINGDINGDING * COACH Disqualification! The champs retain their titles! Not one to run away from a good fight the Gunslingers join in and help the Heavenly Rockers clean house on the Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew. With fists flying everywhere it’s only natural that one stays from its target, as is the case when Jock accidentally nails Logan. “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!” Logan storms to his feet and confronts Jock, who is very apologetic, but the wild child he’s been known to be in the past prevents Logan from thinking clearly, or maybe it’s just from the shot he took. Either way, his wife HOLLY-WOOD arrivals on the scene to play peacemaker and cooler heads prevail, much to the fans delight as “Heart-Shaped Box“ hits. COLE That’s great to see right there. COACH Give me a break. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, I have been informed by the referee that due to outside interference the winners of the match as a result of a disqualification…and STILL HI-YAH tag team champions, Rico de Janeiro and “Sweet” Lucius Soul…THE MARDI GRAS HHHOOOOMMEEWRECKING CREW! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE The crowd doesn’t like it and neither do I. But it’s the right decision. Though their intentions were noble the Heavenly Rockers did interfere in the contest. COACH I guess you aren’t as stupid as you look, Cole. It took 5 years but you finally said something intelligent. There’s still hope for mankind after all. Holly and Melody raise the guys’ hands and all is well…until the Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew cheap shot the Heavenly Rockers from behind, clubbing them with their tag titles! Soul and de Janeiro hightail it before the Gunslingers have any time to stick up for their buddies. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The champs retreat stroking their porno mustache and afro, respectively. COLE A hit and run attack by the champions. A shameful act on their part. But if we know one thing about the Heavenly Rockers, they won’t stay down. The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew may have fired the first shot, but it just may have been their last. Folks, when HeldDOWN makes it return you can look forward to seeing our second title match of the night, ThunderKid defending his Heartland title! It's always a great one when ThunderKid's involved. Don't miss it! COMMERCIAL BREAK While we await HeldDOWN's return let us look at the NL West Division standings. Dodgers17-11 Diamondbacks 16-13 Giants 14-12 Padres 15-13 Rockies 11-17 giants fans u ??? We're broken away from taunting hapless giants fans and suddenly find ourselves transported to Detroit, Michigan and a rather lavish looking house. And, to LEON RODEZ, sat on the porch (wow, those OAOAST contracts must be pretty lucrative if he's got a porch, huh?), looking skywards for a moment before his eyes scan down into the camera. LEON It's not every day your little sister slaps you in the face on national TV. JADE ...well, let's see if you can see this... *SLAP~!* "OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" LEON And Theodore Moneymaker, I hold you directly responsible. Yeah, I packed my bags. I walked away. See, I came back home hoping to clear my head. And everywhere I look in that house, I see my sister. My sister's toys. My sister's clothes. My sister's photos. My sister... the sister that suddenly doesn't seem to exist as I know her anymore. The person who slapped me, that wasn't the little sister I grew up with. *SLAP~!* "OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" LEON Everytime things have got too heavy in the OAOAST, I knew I could come back here to clear my head. When Christian Wright showed up and tried to wreck my career, tried to run me out of the OAOAST, I came back to Detroit... and by the time I returned, I was able to keep a clear head and deal with him in my own way. When Todd Cortez put me on the injury list, damn near broke my neck, I convelesed in the house behind me... and by the time I returned, I'd gained some sense of perspective and I was able to keep my cool at AngleMania. But this... this goes beyond personal. I can't just kick back, watch TV all day, listen to music, whatever it takes to clear my head. Moneymaker, you've poisoned my sister's mind, turned her against me, turned her against everything she ever believed in and loved! This house used to be my solace. And now, even here, there's no escape from what's happened. *SLAP~!* "OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" LEON Being here used to ground me. Now, it's just making me angrier and angrier with every passing day. So, if I can't release that anger here, I know where I can. Moneymaker, I'm coming back next week... and I'm coming for you! FADE OUT Edited May 4, 2007 by Patty O'Green Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted May 4, 2007 (edited) The view returns to the arena were the sold out North Little Rock crowd is understandably abuzz with anticipation for Leon's challenge. But the focus of their thoughts quickly shifts to other matters as Magnum Opus hits, and Alfdogg makes his way out to the ring, drawing boos. Alf is accompanied by two lovely escorts. COLE Heartland title on the line next, and Alfdogg on his way out to the ring! BUFFER The following contest is for the OAOAST Heartland championship, scheduled for one fall! First, introducing the WDW World heavyweight champion...ALFDOGG!!!!! Alf walks down the aisle, and climbs into the ring. COLE And Alf is here, I presume, to announce the newest acquisition of World Domination Wrestling, and Thunderkid's opponent in the forthcoming match! ALF Boy, I got some BIG news tonight! *crowd boos* ALF Before I get around to introducing the man who will bring the OAOAST Heartland title into the fold, I have another very important announcement. COACH What could this one be, Cole? ALF I'm here to announce that next Monday, May the 14th, World Domination Wrestling will return to your television set! *crowd boos* COLE A big announcement indeed! Now, let's hear that other announcement! ALF And now, if I may, here is the challenger for the OAOAST Heartland title, and the newest acquisition of World Domination Wrestling! Weighing in at 218 pounds, and hailing from Thunder Bay, Ontario..."AFTER HOURS" FELIX STRUTTER! Girls, Girls, Girls by Jay-Z hits, and the lights go out. Pink lights shine around the arena, and a pink light illuminates the entryway, as the escorts make their way out to meet Strutter. Strutter walks out confidently, and takes one girl in each arm, making his way to the ring. COLE And this is a big acquisition for WDW, this guy's got a bright future in this business, "After Hours" Felix Strutter! COACH New look for Felix, and he could walk out of here tonight with an OAOAST championship on his way to WDW! Strutter climbs into the ring and poses on the buckles, drawing boos. The ladies remove his vest, and he stretches in the corner as God of Thunder hits and Thunderkid makes his way down the aisle. COLE Well, I'm sure Thunderkid will have something to say about that! BUFFER His opponent...hailing from Green Bay, Wisconsin, and weighing in at 250 pounds...he is the OAOAST Heartland champion...THUNDERKID!!!!! TK slides into the ring, where Strutter attacks! *DING DING DING* COLE And a sneak attack by Felix Strutter! COACH That's what he's gotta do! He wants that title for WDW! Strutter picks up TK, and lays in a CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! And another! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Strutter pulls TK out, and whips him into the ropes, but TK ducks a clothesline, and floors Strutter with one of his own! TK yells out to the crowd, which responds in kind. TK then whips Strutter into the ropes, and picks him up in a PRESS SLAM~! COLE And TK showing off that tremendous power! TK holds him for a few seconds, then tosses him down to the mat! Strutter gets up, holding his back, and TK follows him in, clotheslining him over the top to the floor! COACH And Felix Strutter in big trouble, he needs to get it together! COLE Alf and Axel can't be liking the looks of this match! Strutter walks around a bit and gains his senses, then climbs up onto the apron. TK catches him coming up, and suplexes him back inside! COLE Great execution on that suplex by TK! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! TK backs into the ropes, and drops an elbow! COACH BIG elbow! TK measures, then backs in and drops a second, and then a third! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE And TK going for quick covers, he wants to end this one quick! Strutter gets up and crawls over to the ropes, as TK follows. COACH Break it up, ref, he's in the ropes! COLE Hey! Whose side are you on, anyway? COACH Well, that's the rules, isn't it? COLE This match is for the Heartland title, there are no disqualifications! The ref backs TK off, then when he moves, TK charges, but Strutter delivers a BIG backdrop right to the floor! COLE WOW, TK took a LONG fall on that one! COACH He's hurtin' right now, and Strutter needs to take a breather! Strutter catches his wind, then slides out to follow TK. He reaches under the ring, and finds a kendo stick! COLE And Felix Strutter bringing out the hardware! The crowd gasps as Felix lifts the stick overhead, and brings it down across TK's back! COLE And a hard shot across the muscular back of TK! Strutter tosses TK back into the ring, then backs into the ropes and drops a big knee to the sternum! COLE And a big kneedrop, and a cover! 1... 2... Kickout! Strutter then picks up TK, hooks him, and delivers a DOUBLE-ARM DDT~! COACH And Strutter may be setting him up early here! Cover... 1... 2... Shoulder up! COLE But TK not done yet! Strutter waits for TK to get up, then delivers a foot to the gut, and sets up the THUNDER BAY THROTTLE~!!!111 COACH Here it comes now! Strutter stops to pose, and gets backdropped by TK! COLE Strutter took too long, and TK able to escape! TK charges Strutter, who trips up TK, and hooks the STF~! COLE STF locked in by Felix Strutter! COACH This could be it for TK! TK screams in pain as Strutter cinches in on the hold. TK tries to fight the pain, but eventually starts to fade. COACH It looks like the lights are starting to go out! COLE And Alf has got to be giddy in the back, along with Axel! The referee raises TK's arm... ONE!!! TWO!!! TK keeps the arm up on the third lift! COLE But TK refusing to die! TK puts his free hand on the mat, scoots over slowly, and grabs the bottom rope! COLE And he reaches the ropes! Strutter breaks the hold and allows TK to pull himself up on the ropes. Strutter delivers a knee to the back, then chokes TK on the ropes. He holds for a few seconds, then picks up TK and whips him into the ropes...but puts his head down, and TK executes a sunset flip! 1... 2... NO! Kickout! Strutter pops right up and clotheslines TK to the mat! COACH And Felix Strutter right back on the offensive! Strutter slides back to the outside, and grabs the kendo stick! COLE And Strutter bringing the stick back into play! Strutter measures TK, then brings the stick into his gut! Strutter raises the stick once again, and brings it across his back! Strutter then positions TK, and goes to the top rope... COLE Could be that outstanding legdrop by Felix Strutter! COACH Well, if it is, and it connects, we'll have a new champion! Strutter gets his balance, and goes for the SHOOTING STAR LEGDROP~!!!...but TK rolls out of the way! COLE But nobody home! TK gets up slowly, and starts delivering right jabs, then floors Strutter with a clothesline! Then a second! TK follows up with a BELLY-TO-BELLY~! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Strutter gets the shoulder up! TK picks up Strutter and executes a Fallaway Slam! TK then measures, and hits Strutter with a BICYCLE KICK~!, then looks down at the kendo stick! COLE And now it's TK going after the weapon! TK grabs the stick, as the crowd cheers, and slams it across Strutter's chest! COACH What a shot! TK looks down at Strutter, then raises the stick up in the air, as Charlie Moss and Quentin Benjamin run to the ring and attack from behind! COLE Team Heyross is here! Moss and Benjamin stomp away on TK, to boos from the crowd. Moss picks up TK, and holds him back for Benjamin, who grabs the kendo stick. COLE Come on now! Benjamin points out to the crowd, then takes a home run swing...which hits Charlie Moss, as TK had ducked out of the way! COACH He hit his partner! TK creeps behind Benjamin, and takes him all the way over the top rope with a belly-to-belly! COLE And NOW, maybe TK can finish this defense off! TK picks up Strutter, and hooks him for the THUNDERBOLT DDT~!!!!!11111 However, Alfdogg slides into the ring, grabs the kendo stick, and BLASTS TK right between the eyes! COLE OH NO! TK is out, thanks to Alf! DAMN IT! Alf slides out of the ring, with a smile on his face, as a dazed Felix Strutter picks up TK, hooks him, and delivers the THUNDER BAY THROTTLE~!!!111 COLE No, don't tell me... 1... 2... COLE Kick out! KICK OUT! ... 3!!! *DING DING DING* COLE DAMN IT! We've got a new Heartland champion...and he's under contract with WDW! BUFFER The winner of the match...and NEWWWWWWWWWWWWWW OAOAST Heartland champion..."AFTER HOURS" FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIX STRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRUTTERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!! COACH What does this mean, Cole? COLE A WDW wrestler owns an OAOAST championship! What does this mean for the Heartland title? Your guess is as good as mine, Coach! Alf holds Strutter up in the aisle as he holds his belt in the air, while a groggy, bloodied TK stares them down from the ring. Team Heyross joins Alf and Strutter, their arms raised. COLE I don't know what to think here...I just don't know. Let's go to Josh. We do in fact cut to Josh Matthews who seems to have found his way into a mighty troubling situation.... gives new meaning to the word doggy style AMIRITE e-wrestling pals? COMMERCIAL BREAK Sometime after a body spray ad where a hot woman tells morbidly obese shut ins that they will get laid through the purchase of cheap ass ten dollar spritz that will most likely turn their skin green and cause an outbreak of scabies, we see.... Avril Lavigne? No just her look a like, goth-prep Maggie Nerdly, in a black polo shirt and ruffled black mini skull patterned skirt, stationed in the expertly decorated Action Zone, which features a wealth of flat screen television monitors, each displaying various moments in oaoast history. On the walls hang glittering replicas of the numerous oaoast titles both past and present, along with gorgeous pictures of those superstars that don't look like they've spent the previous night face down in a ditch. MAGGIE NERDLY What's good, what's up, what's happening? Maggie Nerdly, your girl on the scene, telling you that once the show is over, you better bring your BUTT to OAOAST.COM for OAOAST Afterparty, your inside source on all the hottest OAOAST superstars, hosted by you know who, me Megan Nerdly. Errrr....Maggie. I think. This week Tha Puerto Rican takes us on a tour of San Juan, we head into the recording studio with Logan Mann, and Johnny Jackson shows us how to party in Hotlanta, GA. And you can only get into this Afterparty at OAOAST.COM. Try not to be fashionably late. And away from Maggie we go. Where we stop only the next reply in this thread knows! Edited May 4, 2007 by Patty O'Green Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted May 4, 2007 (We open on a shot of a desert road. A motorcycle approaches in the distance, obscured by the heat waves coming off the road. A voice breaks the silence) “Chances are you don't know me. In fact no one really knows me. I'm the face in the crowd that you see one second and forget the next. I'm the drifter that moves from town to town and yet few remember me once I'm gone. Five years ago I lost everything in a fire. My home, my possessions, and my wife. All I was left with were the clothes on my back and my motorcycle. So I set out on the road with no clear direction and no plan, but I knew how to survive.” (We close in on the rider, his long hair blowing in the wind from under his cowboy hat. His face unshaven and burned from the sun as he focuses on an unknown destination.) “I made my living by fighting for money in bars and rundown gyms. All I had left was the fight and it was good to me. Everywhere I went I bruised my knuckles on the faces and bodies of anyone who stood across from me and I loved it. Fighting got my mind off the loss and riding the open road cleared my mind of all else.” (We see the rider smirk to himself as he rides along with the sunset in the background.) “Some might call me cold and uncaring, but the truth is I don't need anyone but myself and I aim to keep it that way. I've lost it all before and I will not lose it all again. Fighting and traveling the country are all I need now, but money is hard to come by nowadays on the road. The fights are becoming fewer and farther in between.” (The rider pulls off into the parking lot of a gas station and parks his bike near the front door. He then walks inside and tips his hat to the clerk. On the TV behind the clerk OAOAST Wrestling is on.) “Then I had an idea. What better way is there to travel the country, and possibly the world, while finding a good fight than to become a wrestler. The few happy memories of my childhood come back to me. Memories of watching wrestling with my brother. Memories of wishing I could be one of them. In my life you cling on to whatever good thing you can and you don't let go, so I knew then where I needed to be.” (The rider pays for his snacks and heads out the door. He then takes in the scenery around him as the gas station attendant walks over to him.) Attendant: "Hi there! What's your name son?" Jacob: "Jacob Cross....and I'm nobody's son." (Jacob hops onto the motorcycle and starts it up) Attendant: "Well Mr. Cross where are you heading?" Jacob: "That...well we'll just have to see won't we?" (With that Jacob speeds off, leaving a cloud of dust in his wake.) “We will see, and when I reach the OAOAST then maybe I can find myself a good fight and maybe I can find some peace.” (Fade out on Jacob riding off into the distance.) COMMERCIAL BREAK Main event! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted May 4, 2007 CREDITS! Jacob Cross KC Tony uno cuatro nueve Alf PRL at some point in time Your's truly! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
