Stephen Joseph

I dont think Portis is gimpy but I agree that Westbrook should be traded now before misses 4 weeks. btw, traded Walker for Chad straight up.

Dont trade Portis, he is legit good now

YOU SUK DUDE (Congrats) I won 2/3 of my FB leagues...and 2nd in this one. Good year.

Oh that's just wrong to say Leena.

Well, if you're not first, you're last. I'm first among losers. Yeah Iggy, that sucks. But like I said in the regular season, you had the best team

That's me. I'm losing. Penny sucked, Oswalt got hurt, and Haren sucked. Popick's lineup is to good for me. you're trouncing my team right now, this is horrible... for me... still, 2nd place, I'll take...there's 18 people that suck, instead of 19

Hmm, Out of my 3 fantasy leagues, I've won one, and am this week in the finals of the other two. Can I go 3 for 3? I suppose everyone will root against me, since well, if I win, you ain't ever gonna live it down for months on end. That's right. Economics, bitches.

OFFICIAL KEEPERS Alex Rodriguez (1) Francisco Liriano (9) Carlos Beltran (2) Matt Cain (8)

My Keepers Liriano (SP) Schmidt (SP) A-Rod (3B) Beltran(OF)

I think there was a contiunity problem with the PR/SJ segments. First PR SJ have the TK promo, and they're on the same page. Then SJ is yelling at PR and they're not. We should have reversed the order, and spaced them out in the show

teddy bear please, Georgia Tech up in this mother fing hizhouse

The camera cuts to The Lightning Crew dressing room where we see The Lightning Crew and Stephen Joseph Popick standing. STEPHEN JOSEPH (fuming~! with DESTROCITY~!) What was that all about last week. I've been trying to reach you all week via your cell phone, pager, home phone, work phone, your 3 girlfriend's various phone, the LC, and no one returns my call. Puerto, are you intentially screwing with our arrangement? our friendship? "THE CORPORATE CHAMPION" THA PUERTO RICAN Look. What I did last week wasn't intentional. It was all in the heat of the moment. You know very well how much the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title means to me. I was going to do whatever it takes to win. You should know that better than anyone else! Remember when we fought each other at November Reign last year? Stephen Joseph Oh, I remember beating you to retain the title at November Reign. I also remember that I gave you that title shot because of our friendship, because you deserved it. But this? Tossing me out of the ring and jeopardizing your change at a World Title Shot? I've had my reign Puerto. It's time for yours. But man, shoot...you don't (SJ acts begrudged). PRL I'm sorry if what I did upset you. But, look at it this way. PRL holds up the contract. THA PUERTO RICAN I now have a guaranteed title shot whenever I wish! HAHAHA! STEPHEN JOSEPH (snaps to attention) It's NOT a fucking JOKE Ed. This is your SHOT, your one SHOT. You've been here for years, putting on the best matches, the best promos. You're the Deker Jeter of this organization, the Most Valuable Player. You're the Rudi Johnson of the wrestling world: dependable, but taken for granted. You have deserved a run with the Belt for years, and politics and certain people have prevented you from getting your deserved run. Did you see how i got my run? Those same people ran off, leaving this company in shambles, and at the last moment, got Trump to put me in a match, because he had NO OTHER OPTIONS. That's the only way they let me have the title, and that's the only way they'll give you a run with the title. We have to make sure that there are NO OTHER OPTIONS TPR The day will come, Popick. The day will come when I use this contract. And on that day, I will NOT let you down, because on that day, I, "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican, will become the World Heavyweight Champion! I want to wait until the right time, though. I want to be 100% sure that this contract will not go to waste. I want to make sure that the match I use this contract for will be the match I win the World Title. And until that day comes, I will see to it, that I give it my all. I will bring my "A" game in every match I have. I will seek to push myself to the limit. I want to be ready for the day. I want to be ready to be World Champion! STEPHEN JOSEPH You will be ready, as long as you listen to me. You will be ready, as long as you trust in your Crew. You will be ready, so long as you believe in yourself. And when the OAOAST presents itself with that next opportunity, where the MILLIONS... THA PUERTO RICAN AAAAANNNDDD MILLIONS... STEPHEN JOSEPH of Puerto Ricans will clamor, riot, and throw themselves in front of tanks to see you as their champion...oh, MY BROTHER, you will be ready! MR. BORICUA TESTIFY! (Puerto and Stephen give Mr. Boricua a weird look). THA PUERTO RICAN Stephen, I'll always have your back, just like you've had mine these past two years. I am honored to call you my manager and "Career Consulant". You have done a magnificent job of guiding my career, helping me become the longest reigning 24/7 Champion in OAOAST history, and helping me win this contract. I'll always be by your side. It's the least I can do. STEPHEN JOSEPH And lastly Ed, when you do win the World Title, I only ask 1 thing of you. Give me that first Title shot. OAOAST will never, ever, let me see that belt up close again, so you're my only shot, my only chance to have one more dance with glory. I just want to WRESTLE for that title one...last...time. THA PUERTO RICAN Of course! When I win the World Title, you will have the first crack at it. It'll be my way of saying "Thank You" for all your help. You hear that Lightning Crew? When I win the World Title, Stephen Joseph Popick will get the first title shot! Is that clear? The Lightning Crew all say "YES!" and nod. PRL Good. STEPHEN JOSEPH Okay. I think we're vibing. PRL So we're cool again? STEPHEN JOSEPH Cool as cucumbers. PRL Cool. Tha Puerto Rican shakes Popick's hand, and then pulls him in for a hug. THA PUERTO RICAN Glad to see that we're on the same page again. STEPHEN JOSEPH So, did you sign the contract? THA PUERTO RICAN Not yet. But I've been carrying it with me the whole week. POPICK You've had the contract for a week, and haven't signed it yet? PRL Yep. MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ It's true. He sleeps with the contract next to him in bed. STEPHEN JOSEPH You don't have sex on top of the contract do you? ::Lindsay blushes:: Oh. Oh man I gotta hurl. PRL Okay. I'll sign it now. Got a pen? Popick hands PRL a pen, as he buries his head in a trash can. PR Thank you. Tha Puerto Rican heads to a table where he plops the contract down, and signs his name on it. Popick wipes his mouth off and stands back up. THA PUERTO RICAN And...there we go! I've got my name on it now! HAHA! PRL kisses the contract. And then hands the pen back to Popick. Popick drops the pen immediately, mouthing "EWWW" PRL Now to put it safely in the briefcase. BORICUA! Mr. Boricua stands up at attention. PRL Give me the briefcase. Mr. Boricua grunts and snorts as he hands Tha Puerto Rican a black briefcase. PRL unlocks the briefcase. THA PUERTO RICAN And there we--hey. WHAT THE HELL?! PRL opens the briefcase to find a bunch of underwear inside it. PRL is confused. THA PUERTO RICAN Boricua, what the hell is this?! MR. BORICUA You. Said. It. Was. A. BRIEF-Case. *BA-DUM-TISH!* THA PUERTO RICAN Boricua...that's not what a briefcase is for. MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ Hey, these are mine! Lindsay pulls out a black thong and a pink thong from the briefcase. MR. BORICUA Oops. Sorry. Mr. Boricua blushes. Tha Puerto Rican throws all the underwear onto the floor. THA PUERTO RICAN Okay. Now then. PRL places the signed contract inside the briefcase. He then shuts the case. PRL There. Now I'm one step closer to my goal, the World Heavyweight Title. Popick, it's good to know that we're seeing eye-to-eye again. STEPHEN JOSEPH We are. And we're going to take this opportunity seriously. I'm going to take out some insurance policies on this contract. We're not going to let anyone have a shot at this. Because this Puerto, this contract, is YOUR future. PRL All right. Well, I gotta go get ready for my match. Once again, this will all work out in the end. What happened last week will payoff in the future. POPICK Yeah. It will payoff. Tha Puerto Rican smiles. PRL opens the door, and The Lightning Crew leave their dressing room. Stephen Joseph watches them leave and then looks at the briefcase. He picks it up and stares at it for a few seconds. He then mouths the following words, "....For me." FADE OUT COMMERCIALS

I'm doing everything that I can to ensure a bye. Sure has been nice to be at the top looking down.

That makes no sense since Melina was actually caring and loving towards mic at SS

You threw rubber snakes at people? Bullshit. You would've been thrown out and most people would've kicked your ass after nearly having a heart attack. I'm calling bullshit on the "20 friends" part, too. No wrestling fan, let alone one who posts on a message board, has more than 5 friends -- and that's a lifetime cumulative total. You might as well have said: "Blah blah blah blah we had a great time, and we had alternating chants of "Let's Go Python, Fuck you Boa"...we chanted "Fuck 'em up Samuel, fuck 'em up", "You suck dick, you suck dick" after that one snake bit on the guy's cock... "Got Milk, got milk" after the snake licked the lady's nipples, "Whole fuckin Show, Whole fuckin show" after Sam Jackson said that famous line about motherfuckin snakes on a motherfuckin plane, and then we chanted "Fuck you, Cena...fuck you, Cena" for the hell of it while most of the audience gave us a puzzled look; then, we threw toilet paper at the screen, but the ushers threw it back at us...then we chanted "You can't usher, you can't usher" at the usher...then he asked us to see our ticket stubs and we chanted, "same old shit, same old shit" then we left while chanting "Change the usher, change the usher." Who let the newb in?

Stephen Joseph announces a match for next week, and talks to PR about his rumble actions

This was a great experience. I saw it with a group of about 20 friends, and we all brought rubber snakes to the movie, throwing them at key moments. The theater was packed , people got into it in part because of our antics. it was a very fun time.

I can happily sub in for a month fued with Drek, since my character has some storyline with him.

Well, that's how I feel. Seems like we just had this discussion pretty recently, though. I would, but then again, everyone knows my views around here.

A commercial begins innocously enough. It's SNAKES...ON A PLANE...premiering this Friday night at theaters everywhere. Samuel L. Jackson is showing fighting various snakes, until the image cuts to SLJ, standing in darkness. SLJ Now, when I'm not fighting motherfucking snakes on a motheringfucking plane, I'm watching motheringfucking wrestling in the OAOAST. Why, Because I said so that's why. I know you've seem me in alot of movies, and you know that I'm the baddest mother fucker on the planet, but I wanted to take time to tell you about a good friend of mine, Stephen Joseph ::Cue cheesy informercial music:: Stephen Joseph is a man of character. Stephen Joseph is a man of integrity. And tonight, he returns to the ring to face...aww what is this crap! (Offscreen Director) Just read the script Samuel. SLJ: I don't know who this motherfucker is! I thought this was a commercial. (OD) It is SLJ: I'm not giving a verbal blowjob to some two-bit hack wrestler who, hell, walks around with some motherfucking Rock wannabe clone! Stephen Joseph: Really? Stephen Joseph has walked into the picture and stands nose to nose with SLJ. He breathes hard and long into his face, and Samuel stares back. Stephen Joseph: Why do you talk so loud? SLJ: This is how I TALK! Stephen Joseph: Why do you smell? SLJ: Motherfucker, we had 500 snakes on a plane, pooping everywhere, dead bodies, why do you think I smell? Stephen Joseph: Sigh. ::Whack!:: (Stephen Joseph knocks SLJ down with a right hand). I'll do this. Tonight, I return to the ring. And unlike Mr Snakes on a Plane here, I don't need to pretend tha I'm a bad man. I know I am.

Did you know that August 17th is Stephen Joseph's birthday?

Sounds Fair. I took a break as I had alot of RL stuff going on, but PRL kept my character active. Should be coming back soon and with enough time to really put forth a good effort. I do think the card idea works well, even if its *PK Segment* Anyways, hello to the new guys, and howdy to my old friends. I can't wait to get back into this in a few weeks.

Again... Liriano. Nuff Said.

I'm looking at keeping A-Rod (1), Liriano (9) Schmidt (5) Rollins(4) Liriano is the #1 rated pitcher at the moment. That is a STEAL in round 9 *does the 3rd place dance*

Yeah, in DC 200,000 will get you a cardboard box in the ghetto. Sucks. Tis why I found a girl who already owned a home in a nice area of alexandria. hoorah