Retard Girl

i'm 'new' here... but i've been using the same character for threeish years now, and i don't see me stopping using 'her' (me?) anytime soon. i've had this itching to create another, newer character, something completely different than myself (because my character is me, pretty much)... partly for the challenge, and partly just to do something different and fun, and not because i want to retire my own character. which this was no answer to your question at all, come to think about it. if you want to retire WC and bring out someone big and bad... go for it.

actually, i think he looks more like jailbait than a pedo...

more than one person has reccomended to me about trying out for some amature night at semi-local clubs. you wouldn't know it here, but i'm a pretty funny person. i don't know how well i'd do just standing there and telling jokes. i'm at my best in just regular, day-to-day situations, when an oppertunity arises for a quick wise-cracking comment, i'm usually the first with one.

Well, I have done that, but really, I'd get fucked in the ass with a dick. Let's just say Leena's not the only one here who's been DPed. See, when I tried to be gay, I said "Well, if I'm going to be gay, I'm doing this shit right, I'm not going to be like these girls who walk around saying they're bi when all they've done is make out with a chick at a party." and I got a couple guys to break me in. Once I went through that, I knew I could do anything. but pegging has it's own sort of fun. you know you like it and while pansexual is such a nice word, i much prefer the term "unstraight". this is what i use in describing myself. so i can get away with shit like fucking trannies and anally deflowering boys. oh, the can of worms i just opened for myself. should i click "add reply" or not. whoops, too late~!

i hate it when people don't know how to put things in alphabetical order. the word "the" is not counted. something like "The Doors" should be under D and not T. thank you for your time.

that's actually kinda impressive for a quake in an area that doesn't usually get them. sometimes i swear there's some quake activity here, but really minor in nature. there's not much that can shake buildings like that.

that's the most frightening thing i've seen today. possibly this week.

brilliant.

the door thing is certainly getting around. love it XD

i like it.

...hahahahaaa at the NYC fighting.

black metal?

dead baby jokes for everyone~!

In front of a nifty generic SWF backdrop, two people stand: Taiga Star and Emma Dumas. Something about the setup tells us that it is promo time... but Ms. Dumas is just staring at the camera. "Um... Emma? I gave the go sign like five minutes ago..." the cameraman says. Taiga bends and twists and looks at her in the face, and this seems to snap Emma out of... out of whatever she was thinking. Or rather, not thinking. Taiga smiles and points to the microphone she is holding, reminding her that she has a job to do. "Hi, Emma Dumas..." Taiga and the cameraman both giggle at the obviousness. "...And I'm standing here with Taiga Star!" Emma sticks the mic in Taiga's face. "Hey there." Taiga states flatly. Emma just stands there again, staring off into space. Perhaps there is something shiny in the distance? Taiga gently guides the microphone back to Emma's mouthal area. Emma snaps back into it (as opposed to snapping out of it) and seems almost surprised that there's a mic in front of her. "So, Taiga, you lost." "Yeah, I lost." Another uncomfortable silence before Emma remembers the interview. "You lost... twice." Taiga gives her a slightly dirty look. "Yeah, I lost twice. Shit happens." "So... um... are you gonna lose against Annie Eclectic too?" "Not if i can help it!" Oh, it's on now. Taiga gives her a very dirty look. "In fact, I've been waiting a while to get my hands on that bitchy slutty has-been. In fact, I can't wait..." Taiga trails off, no so much as she stopped talking as much as the microphone was getting further and further away from her mouth. Emma is standing there, staring off again, picking at her hair and humming softly to herself. Taiga sighs. She looks around and spies Ben Hardy. He appears to be waiting for something to do, standing in front of a backdrop advertising 'SWF DOWNWARD SPIRAL, LIVE (to tape) FROM WORCESTER MASS!', holding a microphone, wearing a suit, and sighing in boredom along with another camera guy. An idea pops into Taiga's head. "Excuse me," she says, "I have to go do a promo." "Oh, okay!" Emma barely pays attention as she begins walking into the distance, tempted by a shiny bottle of nail polish she spies on the makeup cart. Taiga sighs deeply. She takes the note cards from the cameraman (it was no use to give them to Ms. Dumas) and walks over to where Ben is. "Here" she says as she hands him the cards. Ben reads them over, nodding to himself as he memorizes the key points. Then he slips the cards into his pocket and gives the signal to the camera-boy. The little red light turns on. "Good evening ladies and gentlemen, I'm Ben Hardy and standing here with me is Taiga Star. Taiga, you haven't been very lucky lately with getting wins. Do you have anything to say about that?" "Yeah, well... shit happens. Should I be too upset? Nah, I pick up and move on. Everyone loses. My last two matches have been against a seven foot angry Puerto Rican and the crown jewel of the cruisers, Flippy McGuilicuddy. So the odds weren't exactly in my favour anyway." "Tonight at SWF Downward Spiral, you're taking on none other than Annie Eclectic. She's been a thorn in your side, so to speak, since you came to wrestle for us. Would you please share your thoughts on that?" Taiga smiles widely. "Annie Endemic!" "Eclectic," Ben reminds her. "That's what I said." Taiga continues as if not interrupted. "Annie Endemic~! How I've waited to get my hands on you. You've bitched and you've whined and you've stomped your feet like a spoiled little brat. It's time to knock some sense into her. Though, I'm likely to get quite a lot of sense beat into me in the process." "What are your plans for this hardcore match?" Ben asks. "Mister Hardy," Taiga puts an arm around him, all buddy-like, "I'm going to go shopping!" Taiga smiles again. "Then, I'm going to do a little handiwork." "...Handiwork?" Ben looks at her a little weird. "You'll see." Taiga says. "Thank you for your time." Ben just watches her go down the hall. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The lights are blinding at first, an intense white that causes an instant headache. Slowly the world becomes in focus; tiled floors, harsh florescent lighting, bad elevator music. We seem to be in a random home improvement store, people in green vests greet the shoppers with false cooperate cheer. In one aisle, we see a short woman pushing a flatbed cart, wearing pinstriped black pants, obscenely large black boots, and a black tank top. Taiga Star is browsing the bathroom fixtures area, eying a particular model which is discounted. "You see miss," the little man said, "it's a floor model, and it has some scratches and such, really nothing that would affect the wear after a few uses... Miss?" Taiga was only half hearing the vested man, picking up said toilet and placing it on her cart. "Miss, we can get an associate to help you with that..." "Nah, it's okay," says Taiga, "I got this." The man continued. "As I was saying, the discount makes this a good deal." "It's okay sir," Taiga says with a smirk, "it's for a piece of shit anyway." The gentleman and her share a laugh. Then she goes on her way. Seventeen boxes of thumbtacks, a glue gun, bathroom and kitchen fixtures, cheap plywood, barbed wire, a staple gun, one bottle of Pepsi, and two one dollar donations to the Children's Fund later, Taiga is done shopping. She pays for her purchase with cash produced from a fuzzy purple wallet. She loads the items into her truck and returns the cart to the store. Then she is leaving, Megadeth blaring through the speakers, and Taiga smiling happily in the front seat as she pulls out into traffic. ~~~~~~~ "Ow, fuck!" she said, dropping the glue gun. Taiga burns her fingers for a third time. The tack is adhered to her thumb firmly. "Thumb... Tack." she says, looking at it wistfully. For a moment she considers just gluing the tacks directly to her fingers, but thinks better of it and continues to glue the tacks onto the wooden boat paddle she found in a trash pile. Taiga looks up suddenly, hearing something off in the distance. Then around the corner she sees Toxxic walking down the hall with a bundle of folders. He stops when he sees what Taiga is doing, looking over the plastic baseball bat covered with tacks and a similar bat covered with barbed wire. "Those for Annie?" he asks, amused. "Yeah." "Good plan. The prospect of that many pricks should make her run and hide." Taiga and Toxxic share a laugh, and they both go back to what they were doing: Toxx doing official duties and Taiga burning her fingers on the glue gun. ~~~~ "OW!... fuck!!"

thanks. those things are a pain in the ass to use. or rather, pain in the fingers. i blame Eddie Kingston and a bunch of other indy guys for this. no Ultimate Warrior or The Rock here. *raises eyebrow* i was exaggerating about the seven foot you. but from down here, it looks like seven feet XD thanks guys, i feel so validated now

they were a pretty good band, lost among the shuffle of mediocre "grunge" bands back then. Weiland is in my death pool though. i see him going the way of another lead singer of another mediocre grunge band... Lane Stanley. actually, i used to confuse Stone Temple Pilots with Alice in Chains all the time. i still do occasionally.

i see what you did there.

i have a policy of not voulenteering for things like this.

that's fucking...amazing!

maybe he should pull my hair and try to give me worms from the playground... edit: sometimes you people reply faster than i can.

it's so sexy when you insult people <3

I wonder why sarcasmacolor never took off at this board. Because of Slim Citrus. he uses teal, kthx.

like you'd be able to stop for even a week. and for the record, i hope to never be married. humans were not meant for lifetime momoganous relationships.

http://www.godhatesamerica.com/