Retard Girl

former canibal tribes of the south pacific like to eat Spam because the taste and texture reminds them of human flesh.

Taiga just happens to be standing around in the hallways of the Cintas Centre in Cincinnati. Wouldn't you know it, a camera man walks right past her. "Hey, hey you... camera boy!" The camera man turns around. "You busy? Can you get this thing rolling?" She points to the camera. The camera man nods in reply, and sets up the camera on his shoulder. Soon he's rolling, signaling to Taiga that he is ready. "Hey, Taiga Star here. I need to talk about my woman problems..." The camera is seen walking away, he doesn't want to hear about any woman problems! Taiga chases after him. "Wait, wait, I don't mean THOSE kind of woman problems!" The camera turns back around. "I mean problems... with a woman. Annie Electric..." The camera man corrects her. "Eclectic." "Excuse me?" "Eclectic. Annie Eclectic." "Whatever. Annie seems to have a problem with me. Something about needing to show me the ropes, learning my place, et cetera. Something about her being a queen, while I'm a princess. You know... every place I go, it seems someone has a problem with my Princess of Hardcore moniker. But at least I'm not running around calling myself a 'Queen'. Is there something this woman needs to tell us? Is she secretly some tranny? I'm only asking because I can't think of any reason why anyone else would go around calling themselves a 'Queen'. "Not that there's anything wrong with trannies. I have quite the few transvestite friends. Some of them even took me in when I was a starving street child. Just one should be honest about these things. "Honesty. I honestly don't understand why people think I'm some newcomer, green, wet behind the ears, and all those other cliches. While I may be new to SWF, I am in no way new to wrestling. I've been doing this for twelve years. I'm no newcomer. And if Annie Mnemonic wants to test how experienced I am, she is welcome to come try. I've never backed down to anyone... especially a woman. I've made her come out of retirement I suppose. I'm honored. My womaness has made someone uncomfortable. Tremendous. I can sleep more soundly at night now. "I'm done now. Thanks for your time." Taiga turns to walk away, but turns back, as if she has forgotten to mention something. "Oh yeah, while I'm here, I ought to talk about my match. A triple threat, and I have the chance for a chance at the cruiserweight title. My opponents include a scrawny gayboy and a scary monster. "MANSON, I heard your creepy little promo there. Oooohhhh, I'm so skurrd." Taiga makes with some extremely sarcastic frightened woman gestures. "Yeah. Nothing I've not encountered. Pardon my jadedness, but it's true. The dark broody creepy scary dude thing's been done, over and over it's been done. He went on and on about... I dunno, evolution and seeing the future. About how I'm the new guy. Girl. Whatever. "See, again with the assumptions that I'm some noobie to be looked over. If I were MANSON, I wouldn't take me so lightly. You're no monster. I've faced the real monsters of society, the lowest of the human scum, the types that I've evolved past. I think YOU have to prepare for ME. That's right, I said it. You're the one that needs to be careful, because I love to hurt people too. So it looks like we're going to be awfully busy this evening, doesn't it? "Oh, and Jakey. I'll... I'll sit on him or something. And most likely hurt him too. If anyone should be scared, it's Jakey. "So it is said... so it is done." Taiga walks away, and this time, she doesn't come back. ooc edit: yes, i do make sure i look like an ass as often as possible. thank you for playing!

if i lose in the second round, i'll be very upset.

so we book the next show before the recent one is due? i made no sence.

this is gonna be awesome XD

i still would like to read Manson's match

I SHALL MAKE YOU HUMBLE~! or something like that. should we have a thread for this? the WC/Taiga one liner insult war? that'd be sweet. until i beat him, that is

OH IT'S ON! i love this shit, btw XD

that CW title will be mine, you'll see!

obviously not.

i can throw a pretty nasty uppercut...

i'm interested to see how someone else writes me... if that makes any sence.

i've been struggling to overcome the "writing as results" that i've learned in my formative efedding years, to transition to a more 'SWF' style of writing. i just read DDD vs Alan Clark, fun stuff. for some reason i had a hard time following the action... perhaps it's the drunkness i got myself into last night. also, some choice lines of commentary. "Eh, I'm barely here. I just open my mouth occassionally so they'll keep paying me." "There's that look in the eyes again." notes Mak. "I kinda worry that Disney contract was the only thing keeping Clark from going off the rails sometimes." "Well, there's no more contract, so you'd better hurry up and take back those derogatory comments you made about him." "...ME!?" etc.

i read that as Harry Potter. maybe i should clean my glasses.

is this the only losing match? am i seriously the only one that showed for my match? winning my default is no fun. that's like winning the village because you were the only one not to die from the plauge. or something.

i had something profound to put here, but after reading all that Kawalimus drama, i have forgotten what it was.

so far, from what i have read... “You ever use one of her videos before?” King asks. “Lord yes, and my BUTT has never looked better in a bikini!” and Krista's random utterances were awesome.

no amount of coaxing will get me to post them. however, if you manage to find them online, go ahead and spam. i just set myself up for people to find random fatchick pics, didn't i?

yes, you spelled my name wrong. and there's no way in hell my nekkie pics are making it onto this board...

Taiga Star ....wait.

in my pants

i posted that before i had a chance to ask you on AIM.

dace59... are you sure? because it says he hasn't been on since December...

lol, indeeed. no one seems to use it on this side of the Atlantic.

or just me making an ass out of myself. i've gone from loving efedding to hating it within a half hour. do i quit and look like an asshole, or do i stay and look like an asshole? THESE QUESTIONS ANSWERED ON THE NEXT FACINATING EPISODE OF "TAIGA IS A PRAT!"