Jump to content
TSM Forums

Mystery Eskimo

  • Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by Mystery Eskimo

  1. Mystery Eskimo

    Book it up

    Handicap match: Calvin & Dan Black vs Shooter Jay; special referee JINGUS NA title on the line. Hopefully. More please.
  2. Mystery Eskimo

    OAOAST IntenseZone - 9/23/03

    JR: Welcome back. Already in the ring we have two young men looking to make an immediate impact on the OAOAST. We just saw G Money calling out The Shuffle- and Shuffle has wasted no time in responding. The match is ON! Jesse: I like this G Money guy- he wants respect, and he's going to get it! JR: We'll see, Jess. Let's get to it. The Shuffle vs G Money DING DING DING Match starts and both men pace around the ring, eyeing each other. Finally they lock up in a test of strength- and G Money throws the Shuffle to the ground. Shuffle pops back up and they lock up again- Money locks him in a hammer lock- and then drops him with a back suplex. Money moves over and throws on a choke hold, which is quickly broken up by the ref. Both men are up and Money goes to Irish Whip Shuffle into the ropes, but it's reversed, and Money runs into a closeline. Money pops up- they lock and Shuffle goes for a snap suplex, only to be throw to the ground by Money. Money kicks Shuffle in the head- turns to the crowd and gives his trademark evil smirk. He picks Shuffle up and nails him with a HUGE SHOULDER BREAKER.. Shuffle rolls out of the ring to regroup. He's holding his neck a little bit- feeling the affects of the shoulder breaker. He turns to the crowd, and calls for a little noise and encouragement. Rolling back into the ring, he's met with an attempted Super Kick from Money. Shuffle ducks the Kick, and locks Money into the half-nelson- then delivers a vicious HALF-NELSON SUPLEX. Shuffle covers for the pin- but Money kicks out before the count starts. Both me are up- they trade hard chops- until Money drives Shuffle into the turn buckle, Money raises his foot to choke Shuffle against the turnbuckle- and breaks just before the 5 count. Money hooks in for a double-underhook move- but Shuffle is able to block and flips him into a back body drop. Both men are up and Shuffle Irish Whips Money into the ropes, he goes for the standing Spinebuster, but Money is able to hold on- he drops Shuffle with a take down and tries to lock in the GOLDLEAF!!. Shuffle is able to bust out before the hold is locked in. Both men lock up again- and Money goes for the Irish Whip, Reversed and as Money comes off the ropes, Shuffle hits a HUGE drop kick, flipping Money over the top rope. Money is on the ground outside the ring and Shuffle goes to the top rope, he leap for a leg drop, but Money rolls away. Shuffle is on the ground in pain. Money comes over and applies a neck wrench hold- Shuffle fights it- but with no ropes he's in trouble. Eventually he's able to power up and backs into the ring steps- slamming Money against them. Shuffle's back into the ring- and his neck is a bad shape. If Money is able to get the Goldleaf on him- it'll be all over. Money's back into the ring and both men pace around again- measuring each other and catching their breath. Money charges but Shuffle hits a drop toe old- Money's down- Shuffle goes to lift him up- but Money his the LOW BLOW!! Money moves over to lock on the Goldleaf- but Shuffle is JUST able to get to the ropes. They're back up again- Shuffle is still recovering- Money comes in with the Super Kick but Shuffle blocks- he grabs his leg and then nails a MASSIVE STANDING SPINEBUSTER. Shuffle backs up and singles for the Shuffle Slam!! He lifts Money, but Money blocks and Shuffle can't get him up- Money nails a jaw breaker and goes for a quick cover. 1... 2... NO!! Shuffle reverses the cover into a cover of his own 1... 2... and Money kicks out. Again they lock up- Money reverses and has him in position for a tilt a whirl back breaker- but Shuffle snapmares him down. Shuffle fires a STIFF kick to the back of the head, and Money is down. Shuffle with the over and Money JUST gets his shoulder up before the 3 count. One more lock up and Money tries to slip a hammer lock on Shuffle, but Shuffle nails a kick to the midsection- he's got Money locked in and lifts him up... throwing an extra spin in for emphasis- he hits the SHUFFLE BOMB!!! 1... 2... 3!!!!!!!!!!! Shuffle gets up to start his celebration dance the "B. Diddy Shuffle"-but mid dance he's nailed with another low blow by G Money. As Shuffle is down- Money locks in the GOLDLEAF!! Shuffle's in pain and taps, Money won't break the hold until security pulls him off. Money's music hits- and he cracks his victory SMIRK and celebrates as he leaves the ring. JR: BAH GAWD, great performance by The Shuffle, but he's left lying by G Money! Jesse: It was obviously a fast count on the pinfall. GM has every right to feel upset. JR: The Shuffle picks up the win, but this may not be over between these two. We'll be right back, don't touch that dial folks! COMMERCIALS
  3. Mystery Eskimo

    SJL Countdown To Genesis Card, 9-28

    8....thousand? I have one night free to write. Hmm. Should be interesting
  4. Mystery Eskimo

    English Football

    Arsene Wenger reminds me of a wrestling heel commentator in his blind defence of Arsenal (if anyone is a heel team, its Arsenal) and accusations that RVN is a cheat. It's great.
  5. Mystery Eskimo

    OAOAST IntenseZone - 9/23/03

    As we return from the break, we survey the scene of Dan Black's office. Black sits behind a huge, polished desk, watching something on a plasma screen. We pan round, and see the IZ GM is taking in Jay Darring's words, delivered moments ago. There's a small smirk on Dan's face as he watches, before he abruptly switches the screen off as there's a knock on his office door. Dan: Enter! The camera goes to take in the newcomer, but a sharp word from Black stops it. Black rises and shakes hands with someone out of the shot. Dan: Good to see you...you ready for tonight? There's no reply, but evidently Dan is satisfied. Dan: Excellent. Stephen Joseph may think he played a trump card bringing JINGUS into our match as special referee, but Shooter Jenny will need more than that freak to survive...ok, go. I'll call you later. There's no movement. Dan: I said GO, DAMMIT! I'm not paying you for nothing. And you, cameraman, get the BEEP out of here! We cut back to announcers. JR: Well, we apologise for Mr. Black's language. He evidently has another scheme in progress. I hope Jay watches his back out there. Jesse: He'll need to watch out for two tough opponents, Jim Ross. We're just days from Jay vs Calvin at Dirty Deeds, and Dan Black will be doing everything he can do help Calvin gain the advantage going into that match. JR: Black seemingly has a new employee, let's just hope he stays well away from the match. Now, let's get- We return from the commercial break and a unrecognized theme music plays as a man with long blonde hair and wearing a silver tracksuit on makes his way towards the ring. The man climbs the ring steps, and stops at the top to pose for the crowd. He climbs into the ring through the middle ropes and pulls a mic out that was tucked into his trousers underneath his jacket. “Good evening ladies and gentleman, I can tell your having a great time tonight, and I wish I could say the same. Before I get into all that I’d like to introduce myself. My name is G-Money, and I come from what you Americans would call “jolly old England” another typical American stereotype you have placed upon my nationality like you have so many others around the world. The reason that I am not enjoying myself, my first night in a new job is that, a large percentage of my co-workers are lazy, badly motivated and poorly educated. I am referring to every American in the backstage area be they talent, sound engineer, security guard, you people get the picture? *Crowd boo’s loudly* And my reasoning for being here on Intense Zone is one thing and one thing only, to capture the North American title, because I want to destroy the object around here the optimizes what I hate about America: the greed to be the champion, the same greed like every American has for that little bit more, more of what they simply can’t achieve, something that all the rest of the world can see, but you just can’t. Everyone of you has greed, I admit I probably have more greed for money and power than any of you imagine. But all of you, you have a greed worse than mine, oh yes, you people will not work for your desires, you will simply cruise through life doing the minimum amount of work. So just to prove I will work my way to something, and not just demand it, I’m going to work my way up the roster to get to the NA title, and this all starts tonight. I’m challenging the newest member of the roster other than myself to a match, that’s right I’m asking.. no I’m telling you, Shuffle get out here right now and face me.” Shuffles music hits and he walks out with his pyro shooting off, G-Money in the ring strips off his tracksuit down to his singlet and runs the ropes, as Shuffle gets in the ring as a ref runs down to the ring to officiate the match. JR: We'll be right back with Shuffle vs G-Money! Stay tuned! COMMERCIALS
  6. Mystery Eskimo

    Are all e-feds like this?

    Drop by the OAOAST No role playing, but plenty of chances to work in your ideas.
  7. Mystery Eskimo

    TSM Poster Tournament II

    Sandman9000 Caboose Lightening Flik Zack Malibu evenflow Ripper DangerousA Rico_Constantino Johnson Texas Small Arms Wrestling Deacon chave Cancer Marney LaParkaYourCar SweetNSexyDiva Raven1919 Dr. Tom Bob barron Kotz Banky RavishingRickRudo Youth N Asia Canadian Chick WelshJerichoMark FrozenBlockOfPissReborn CobainWasMurdered SpiderPoet Kinetic JHawk Anglesault ShooterJay Big Poppa Popick
  8. Mystery Eskimo

    English Football

    He looked like a salmon leaping for that header. Bah, we lost 3-1.
  9. Mystery Eskimo

    How liberal or conservative are you?

    9 :: expires from bleeding of the heart ::
  10. Mystery Eskimo

    Book it up

    I'm sure we can find you something...do you want to cut a promo for this week or next weeks show?
  11. Mystery Eskimo

    TSM Poster Tournament II

    I nominate Caboose.
  12. Mystery Eskimo

    English Football

    Crewe away for us tomorrow. 3-1 to Forest, my predict. Here's hoping United thrash Arsenal.
  13. Mystery Eskimo

    Are all e-feds like this?

    God almighty, that was awful. Yeah, join the SWF. Or, if you don't like writing matches regularly, the OAOAST. Or both, if you're an e-fed whore with too much time on your hands.
  14. Mystery Eskimo

    Use this word in a sentence

    My visits to this forum are intermittent. Use: Porcine
  15. Mystery Eskimo

    Hans Blix: Iraq Destroyed WMD 10 Years Ago

    Well, America is more powerful than the UN and doesn't listen to a thing it says, so it's not surprising the American people think badly of it. Not that the UN says anything worth listening to.
  16. Mystery Eskimo

    Brits! Please torture David Blaine!

    There's been a suggestion that his water supply should be spiked with Viagra.
  17. Mystery Eskimo

    TSM Poster Tournament II

  18. Mystery Eskimo

    Wrath predictions!

    TRIPLE THREAT MATCH Daemon vs. Dominic Korgath vs. Brian Kingsmen - Korgath TELEVISION TITLE MATCH Jay Morrison vs. Brian Bowers© -Bowers EUROPEAN TITLE MATCH Jimmy “The Demon” Liston vs. Todd Royal© - TODD~! ELIMINATION MATCH Aecas vs. Manson vs. “Hollywood” Spike Jenkins - Aecas WORLD TITLE MATCH “Insane Luchador” Andrew Rickmen vs. English Dragon© - No predict...should be tough but I don't want to drop the title on first defence so I'll be putting in my best.
  19. Mystery Eskimo

    Book it up

    I'm posting, by the way. Everything to me by tuesday at noon.
  20. Mystery Eskimo

    Metal comments

    Aye to that. Speaking of, I'm hoping the next card will be up soon...
  21. Mystery Eskimo

    English Football

    Any day when Arsenal take a beating is a good day.
  22. Mystery Eskimo

    Why Should I hate Bill Goldberg?

    I like Goldberg.
  23. Mystery Eskimo

    Metal comments

    Go Todd~! And well done to IL, too.
  24. Mystery Eskimo

    What are you listening to right now?

    In honour of the reformation of the Pixies- Doolittle.
  25. Mystery Eskimo

    Pixies reunite.

    If they're not coming to the UK, I shall...well, do nothing. But I demand they come.