Art Sandusky

I would kill any given redneck out in Allendale County, SC. Pieces of shit out there blame everyone but themselves for their hellish, static existence. It's the fault of blacks, or Mexicans, or Floridians moving in and ruining their "pristine" way of life. Fuck you all for voting against your own interests every November. You put yourselves in this mess with every "nigger," every "wetback," every "goddamn liberal" you've blamed for your dead-end lives. Look at yourselves in the mirror and ask yourself who's at fault for your impoverished way of life. Yes, I'd kill the poor, but just a high-profile redneck to show how futile their resistance to the 21st century is.

I think pwning standards have changed in the last few years. I'm still working with the 2002 manual.

Effective, but too mature. **3/4.

I'm giving up posting in bad threads. (leaves board completely until Easter)

"I flamed Jingus for five pages and all I got was this lousy Kylie insult." Pity that wouldn't fit on a shirt.

Damn straight you don't. I'll insult you over the internet!

So THAT'S who C'mon Man is. I'd been wondering.

TSM Lent starts on Monday, homeboy... I ain't your fucking homeboy, you posin'-ass twatwaffle. If I were Canadian and lacking a brain stem, maybe. MAYBE.

CheesalaIsGood? Meh, meant that more appearance-wise. You know the kind of guy I'm talking about.

Lent still hasn't started yet, huh? Yeesh, can't even stick to an internet pledge and then wonder why maybe .5% of this place thinks you should have offspring.

What's Sweetest Day? Never heard of it before.

Ironically KOAB, I know a guy who never wears shoes who we call Foley since his name's Patrick too. Somehow he thinks it's an endearing trick to hold a lighter under his foot and show how he can't feel it. Him and Jingus would get along. Aw snap, Thread Killer's here. Will he kill my humble thread about stereotypical Paultards?

See? Busted. Not in the "caught" way, in the "I, somehow, perhaps through intraveneously fed drugs, think this is acceptable for public view" way.

I was 16 and took a girl named Amy (I think) who was 15 to a great Italian place downtown that sadly no longer exists. After dinner, we snuck around the Charleston Place Hotel (if you've never been here, it's one of two or three legit really sweet hotels). Went up on the roof, grabbed handful after handful of hard candy from the conference rooms, ganked some silverware and tea packets I'd never seen before or since, talked our way into the spa, and played the piano in the grand hallway on the second floor. After that, we went over to my old elementary school (also downtown), found an unlocked door, and performed spontaneous monologues for each other on the stage in the cafeteria. This was in the days when making a move on a dear sweet female was unconscionable in my mind because I respected them waaaaaaay too much, so I got nothing out of it. Still, it provided a great outline for future dates and gave me a fun story.

Thank goodness C-Bacon's back. This board's lacking in realness.

I should add that I'm watching He's Just Not That Into You while I spew all this hatred. This admission means that Jingus must be on an even lower level and that's frightening.

That's the closest to a hangover I get, unless I've got something to distract me. The funk passes then. If I have the day off then it's just time to get drunk again.

Booze is nature's reset button. That and I can't stand that shit. It's like you're too fucking lazy to tie your goddamn shoes.

The funny part is that you think that's a positive for someone. Boy, I'd better not insult Jingus anymore, this mouth-breathing, waste of carbon (and the other five SPONCH elements) is taking issue with it! If I don't stop he might drool all over me, or maybe do a line of coke off of my fallen e-corpse. Man, fuck you. How did I miss this?! Damned if I know. I'm a little jealous of Gary Floyd. I create a thread dedicated to the sole purpose of expunging the sizzurp-swilling creepoid that probably wears those sandals with a heel strap and a faggy necklace with a little sword or celtic pendant to Unappreciated Twentysomething Retards meetings (UTR, as they call it) from our dear messageboard and he didn't have the goddamn common courtesy to respond to it. Meanwhile, Gary gets a PM/S (see what I did there it means Jingus produces estrogen) from the guy! Do I have to descend into the depths of America's Hell (Texas) and slap you across your stupid fucking face? Jesus, this board used to have balls.

Meh, you blew the "meaning of life" load a little early for this concept. Shoulda waited a couple of weeks.

It's not mine, it's a Joss Whedon quote. Are we supposed to stop inserting random pop culture snippets of dialogue as answers, like everyone else was doing? I did no such thing. You calling me a liar?

The meaning of life is to continue life. Thus, murderers' true crimes are missing the point.

Lest, not less. C'mon man, if you're going to be a teenage elitist, at least get shit right.

Shit, shower, and shave! The Three S's, as my father and I call it.

Nigga, lent started two days ago. Procrastin'-ass mugg won't do shit.