Dr. Zoidberg

*blank stare to the sky...officially knocked coocoo...for...COCOA PUFFS?!~!* I got owned by Choko

yeah, I don't even know what I said...I kinda tuned out when I wrote it... ...yeeeah...hey, what's that?! *hits Slacker with the X Title and runs away*

Jay...you bastard...my music's "Deceptacon" by Le Tigre! Damn you! It's fine, man...but THAT...is how an X Title match should be written, my friends! Jay, you pimp daddy you...JUMP TO HD! FEUD WITH ME AND EVERYONE! PLEASE! TRIPLE THREAT FEUD! JAY VS. RAGDOLL VS. MAD MATT! Everything else was MONDO COOL!~, except for the ominous stuff. If this is anything but Raven saying he's joining the OAOAST, I'm going to be very upset. EDIT: There...it's Raven now...fuckers...

"Greatest. Swerve. Ever."? Comic Book Guy from the Simpson's is joining?

I'll complain about whatever I want. Anyway, I live in NorCal, and I'm guessing that most of those feds are down south. I did however see some stuff on Bay Area Wrestling here, so I'm gonna check that out sometime soon. but yeah...I hate you East Coasters...bastards...ooo, RoH! I don't care! *cries* and do not mock Portland Wrestling! I mark for The Player/Louis "The Kid" Rock/whatever his name is now.

I normally hate Rap, but I will say I like Jurassic 5 and The Neptunes. I'll tell you an MTV performance that I would enjoy: David FUCKIN Bowie and The Neptunes performing "Fame" or "1984" and Fuck Good Charlotte..."We're punk because we wear Eye-Shadow" Fuck you! I liked the song "Little Things" then, BAM...they're hosting "All Things Rock"...which is kind of ironic considering the lead "singer" of GC acts like he's ghetto. Bastard. AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON THEM SHOWING SKATING IN "PUNK" VIDEOS! Now everybody I meet in Arizona assumes I like GC and Avril...God, now I'm pissed off. And ant7000 or whatever: on the topic of skating kinda: you remind me a lot of a guy named Brandon Biebel...look him up...he's funnier than hell.

I'm glad there's an Elimination Chamber match up. I've been wanting to have the Disciples of Micheals (Spanky, Micheal Shane, Paul London, etc.) go HEAD-2-HEAD!~ in that mode. and as for who I'll play as first? Version 1.0...'nuff said, trick.

....My valet looks like Mandy Moore...with black hair. What's up now?! HUH?!~

I noticed that they don't really seem like the happiest of couples. Kinda weird.

*Runs in and beltshots everybody with the X Title, having dropped the 3-Fed Title in Japan to Paul London. Grabs Axel by the head and lifts him up....DEVIL DOLL! Now grabs a mic* "MAD MATT! This Sunday...this...will be you!" *STEALS THE BEER!~* I'm sorry...I am 17 different types of bored.

Uhhh.... *beltshots LPYC again and runs away* Ok...how about "Shooter" Jay Darring vs. "The King of New School" Ragdoll? You'll have to write it though, Jay...if you accept. School starts Monday, which means I have less time to write matches.

You know WHAT? I think I might just do that! Now WHAT are the matches?

Dude, Jay... How about "Shooter" Jay Dorring and "X Champion" Ragdoll vs. Mad Matt and a partner of his choosing? DUDE! Jay and Ragdoll = Ratings! DUDE!

500$ on Jericho 300$ on Benoit 200$ on Shane O'Mac

AS: Good point, I withdraw my remark. LPYC: Well...You know...I...Pfft...No...Hey look! *blindsides The Parka with the X Title belt and runs away*

I hope everyone enjoyed my match...the ending was kind of Shaniqua like (meaning it's Bleh), but I thought it added more tension to the match at AS plus, I was SUPER tired when I wrote it, and I just did what I thought was cool.

God Dammit! Why can't we see RoH in California, for christ sakes?! What the hell is this?! What do we have?! California has nothing cool! The East Coast has CZW, RoH, JAPW, I'm guessing MLW...we have nothing! *cries for not being able to see CM Punk, Raven, Colt Cabana, and AJ Styles*

No, I saw the flick. I enjoyed it quite a bit. It's been awhile since I saw a good western movie, and this one was good. From the very few scenes that we saw of him, the guy that killed Homes (I think that's his name...the fat guy?) with the broken arm, he pissed me off. Robert Duvall did an excellent job, and I'm glad that Costner found a role that was actually good. All in all, it was a good movie, and the final gunfight was really cool. Especially that shotgun blast through the wall. THAT was cool.

Spoiler (Highlight to Read): Matt, I don't really think a TLC match would be a good idea for this PPV. How about just a No DQ match, and then one of the guys can pull out a ladder? They do bring up a good point about how the title would be hung...let's save that for the next PPV, all right? TLC for the X Title at the next PPV...is that cool with you? and dammit, AS...you just had to return after I retired K-Money, didn't you?

All right, so it's Mad Matt vs. Axel vs. Ragdoll © for the OAOAST X Title? This Thursday on HeldDown?! A Triple Threat Elimination Match?! DON'T MISS IT!!~ I know I won't...hell, I AM writing it...shit...

Full Name: Ragdoll Shortened Name: Ragdoll Gender: Male Birth Month: November Age: 19 Weight Class: Lightweight Photo: None Contract: Written Employer: OaOast Disposition: Heel Card Position: Upper Mid Gimmick: Unique (or Bad Ass) Wage: 24,000$ All the following out of 100... Brawling: 100 Speed: 85 Technical: 80 Stiffness: 65 Selling: 100 Over: 80 Charisma: 100 Attitude: 100 Behavior: 100 All of the following answer Yes or No... High Spots? Yes Superstar Look? Yes Announcer? Yes Shoot Fighting Ability? No Diva? No Booker? No Fonz Factor? (Do you have a natural charisma?) Yes Menacing? Yes Trainer? No Speaks? Yes Nationality: American Primary Finisher: Devil Doll (Impact) Other Finisher: Las Vegas Nightmare (Top Rope) Tag Team: None Stable: None Manager: Melanie Full Name: Melanie Shortened Name: Melanie Gender: Female Birth Month: January Age: 18 Weight Class: Lightweight Photo: None Contract: Written Employer: OaOast Disposition: Tweener Card Position: Manager Gimmick: Girl-Next-Door Wage: 24,000 All the following out of 100... Brawling: 25 Speed: 25 Technical: 25 Stiffness: 5 Selling: 94 Over: 80 Charisma: 100 Attitude: 100 Behavior: 100 All of the following answer Yes or No... High Spots? Yes Superstar Look? Oh Yeah Announcer? Yes Shoot Fighting Ability? No Diva? Yes Booker? No Fonz Factor? (Do you have a natural charisma?) Yes Menacing? No Trainer? No Speaks? Yes Nationality: American Primary Finisher: Last Caress (Impact) Other Finisher: The Clash (Impact)

Ragdoll accepts the challenge of Mad Matt...but on HD, he challenges Matt and Axel...X Title Triple Threat Elimination Match! If they're down for it instead of a Tag Title Shot. If not, then I'll just have Spoiler (Highlight to Read): Josie vs. Melanie

Ok, I know this doesn't belong here, but what is the Colt 45? Oh, uh...which show has Spanky vs. Paul London vs. Micheal Shane for the rights to the Showstopper monicer?

That's really good...very good in fact. Now, how about CM Punk and Colt Cabana?

First off: I cheat. I set it so MWA had the best of everything. I made it so K-Money was the most talented wrestler EVER, and Ragdoll is now called Iceman (blast from the past. Some might know what I'm talking about). And you know what? I don't care! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....HA! HA! HAHAHAHAHAHA! Right...onto the show MWA Friday Night! Announcers: Dallas Page and Ric Flair This is the seventh MWA show. Reviewed by THE DAMES!~ Segment 1 -The fans erupt as the music of KURT ANGLE hit the P.A. system! Kurt quickly hops into the ring and grabs a mic. "You know...last week, I was at home...and I had to watch K-Money come out here and run his mouth about me. He said 'Oh, Angle is a puss for not being here tonight, he's a puss!' Well, would a puss win a gold medal with a broken FREAKIN' neck?!" The fans scream 'HELL NO!' "That's damn right...So...Money? I want you TO-NIGHT! And I will take that MWA Title from you, it's True, it's DAMN TR..." "E-NUFF!" The fans boo as K-MONEY and the rest of THE FIRM walk out to the rampway. Money glares at Angle, who is now pacing inside the ring. "Angle...who the hell do you think you are?! Last time I checked, you were the one lying in the middle of the ring, blood gushing from your forehead! You think you're not a pussy? Prove it! Tonight, you will face Chris Jericho...if you beat him, you get a Title Shot at Helloween...if you lose, which is what WILL happen, you have to start all over from the bottom...are you down for that?" Angle simply nods. Tonight! Kurt Angle faces Chris Jericho! Rating: 86% Segment 2: Cruiserweight Title #1 Contendership Hurricane vs Jody Fleisch vs Spanky vs Kid Kash. Match Background: This will be an elimination bout. This match is for the Cruiser #1 Contender title. Spanky has been Cruiser #1 Contender champion since 12 September 2003. The Match: STIFF high kick on Kash by Hurricane. Implant DDT by Hurricane! I will always and forever mark out for that move. There's a two count on the pin. Hurricane drops an elbow...but Kid Kash moves out of the way. Tag between Kid Kash and Spanky. Hurricane takes a flying neckbreaker from Spanky. The referee bumps after catching a wild right hand and is down. Power drive elbow by Spanky. That sounds like a feature on a 4 x 4, doesn't it. Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Second rope flying axe handle, Hurricane goes down. One day, Spanky might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Hurricane blocks a kick from Spanky. Tag to Jody Fleisch. Fleisch crushes Spanky with a running senton. Jody Fleisch hits a rolling kick on Spanky. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Jody Fleisch misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Second rope flying axe handle, Fleisch goes down. One day, Spanky might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Tor-NADO DDT from Spanky, Fleisch got planted! Cover gets three for Spanky, Fleisch got pinned. STIFF high kick on Spanky by Kid Kash. Spin kick by Kid Kash to the face sends the opponent FLYING across the ring. Covers for a quick two count. Kash crushes Spanky with a huge legdrop. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Spanky counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Springboard dropkick from Spanky. Nicely done. Tag between Spanky and Hurricane. Tor-NADO DDT from Hurricane, Kash got planted! ONE...TWO...THREE. Hurricane defeats Kash. STIFF~! chop lights up Spanky who covers up to try and stop the agonizing PAIN! Spanky pushes out of a Hurricane hold. Hurricane takes a NICE hurrancarana from Spanky. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Hurricane pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Hard back suplex on Spanky. Come to think of it, that move had WAY too much power in No Mercy for N64. Hurricane floors Spanky. Shining Wizard!!! 1....2....3!! It's all over. My Opinion: Oh, look out...almost ***, but not quite. **3/4. Overall Rating; 75% Segment 3: Matt Hardy (Version 1, BTW) is backstage. "I was just informed that Hurricane is now the Cruiserweight #1 Contender...wow...if that's the best this fed has got in the Cruiser division, then maybe I should become a heavyweight...Well, Hurricane, at Helloween, you will go face-to-face with Mattitude, and I will prove why I am the Nero to your Green Lantern, why I am the Yellow ring to your Green, why I am the Bane to your Batman...In other words, Hurricane, why I am the best...and why you are sh*t..." Rating: 77% Segment 4 MWA Cruiserweight Title Match Ultimo Dragon vs Matt Hardy Version 1.0. Match Background: This match is for the MWA Cruiserweight title. Matt Hardy Version 1.0 has been MWA Cruiserweight champion since 02 September 2003. The Match: Standing leg lariat by Matt Hardy Version 1.0 on Ultimo. STIFF~! chop lights up Ultimo who covers up to try and stop the agonizing PAIN! Implant DDT by Matt Hardy Version 1.0! I will always and forever mark out for that move. Spin kick by Matt Hardy Version 1.0 to the face sends the opponent FLYING across the ring. Matt drops an elbow...but Ultimo Dragon moves out of the way. Hard back suplex on Matt. Come to think of it, that move had WAY too much power in No Mercy for N64. Matt takes a NICE hurrancarana from Ultimo Dragon. Hooks the leg for a two count. Matt counters a sleeper with a jaw breaker and is able to get free! Spinning bulldog in the corner and Ultimo is down! Hooks the leg for a two count. Vicious kick to the teeth from Matt Hardy Version 1.0. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Ultimo backdrops Matt Hardy Version 1.0 out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of Ultimo Dragon. Ultimo just WAFFLES Matt with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! Matt Hardy Version 1.0 avoids a Ultimo Dragon avalanche by getting out of the damn way! THERE IT IS! A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! I swear, that makes any match just a little bit better. I don't mind telling you that every time I see it, that's for sure. Ultimo Dragon can barely stand. Version 1.0!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!! Hurricane comes running down the aisle with a chair! Matt Hardy Version 1.0 is just leaving the ring...and Hurricane scores with a brutal chair shot! Matt Hardy Version 1.0 falls to the floor holding his head. My Opinion: *** rating for an above average match. Overall Rating: 79% Segment 5 Frankie Kazarian and Jay Lethal (of D-Generation XXX) are in the ring. These two are the current Tag #1 Contenders. From behind the curtain, The Unholy Alliance (Mikey Whipwreck and Tajiri), the MWA Tag Team Champions, come out. Kazarian demands that their title shot be tonight, and The UA nod in approval. Looks like we have a Tag Title Match after the commercial break! COMMERCIAL Segment 6 K-Money is backstage. "Angle...I have a confession to make: I am actually ROOTING for you tonight...you have no idea just how much I want to get my hands around your neck and choke the hell out of you! You have no idea just how much I want to beat the living hell out of you on PPV...I have lied awake at night thinking about how much I want to hurt you...Becky has complained that I wake her up when I start to choke my pillow, thinking it's you...so tonight? Best of luck to you...best of luck against Y2J, Capt. America...because you are going to need it...Have a nice night, you red, white, and blue bastard...and prepare for hell." Rating: 93% Segment 7 MWA Tag Team Title Match Unholy Alliance vs Kazarian and Lethal. Match Background: Kazarian and Lethal used to be a regular team, but have been inactive for a while. Whether this match will lead to a reformation as an active unit remains to be seen. This match is for the MWA Tag Team titles. Unholy Alliance have been MWA Tag Team champions since 02 September 2003. The Match: Mikey Whipwreck strikes Kazarian. Hard back suplex on Kazarian. Come to think of it, that move had WAY too much power in No Mercy for N64. Hooks the leg for a two count. Tag between Mikey Whipwreck and Tajiri. Mikey Whipwreck scoops up Kazarian. Tajiri bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Covers for a quick two count. Hard back suplex on Kazarian. Come to think of it, that move had WAY too much power in No Mercy for N64. Kazarian reverses a waistlock. Super kick by Frankie Kazarian. There's a two count on the pin. Tag to Jay Lethal. Lethal crushes Tajiri with a running senton. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Hard back suplex on Tajiri. Come to think of it, that move had WAY too much power in No Mercy for N64. Lethal walks into a drop toe hold. Lethal takes a flying neckbreaker from Tajiri. Tag between Tajiri and Mikey Whipwreck. Whipwreck just WAFFLES Lethal with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! Tag to Frankie Kazarian. Kazarian takes a flying neckbreaker from Mikey Whipwreck. Frankie Kazarian is in big trouble...KickerSnapper!! 1....2....3! Triple X 2 come running down the aisle with chairs! They slide in, but Unholy Alliance are ready, and disarm them quickly! Triple X 2 leave the ring, their attempt at an ambush foiled. My Opinion: I'm capable of giving out high star ratings...but only for matches that really deserve it. This one didn't. **1/4. Overall Rating: 72% Segment 8 Becky Zullo is backstage with her client Chris Jericho. Becky explains that she knows tonight will be a big night, and so she wants Chris Jericho to put on a career-best performance. The scene fades out as the praise and motivation continues. Rating: 90% Segment 9 Chris Jericho vs Kurt Angle. Match Background: Angle has been feuding with K-Money recently, who is a stable mate of Jericho in The Firm. The Match: Kurt Angle snap suplexes Jericho. Chris Jericho is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Back suplex on Angle. Chris Jericho misses a clothesline...and takes out the referee accidentally! Front legsweep slam aka The Stroke by Chris Jericho. Cover, but there's no one to count for Chris Jericho! Jericho charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Chris Jericho takes a butterfly suplex from Angle. Doctor Bomb and Jericho is hurt. Hooks the leg for a two count. BURNING HAMMER~! from Kurt Angle is executed with perfect brutally! Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Jericho counters a sleeper with a jaw breaker and is able to get free! Spinning bulldog in the corner and Angle is down! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Jericho drops an elbow...but Kurt Angle moves out of the way. K-Money comes running down the aisle with a chair! Jericho goes to irish whip Kurt Angle into the ropes. Money prepares to swing the chair...but Kurt Angle reverses! Money accidentally smacks Jericho with a chair to the back! Chris Jericho can barely stand. Angle Slam!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!! Kurt Angle fights back, and has soon sent both Chris Jericho and K-Money into retreat. My Opinion: A ****3/4 rating for a great match. Close, but not 5 stars. Overall Rating: 97% Show Overall Rating: 82% My Opinion: God Dames, you are cruel! The Money/Angle feud is, quite obviously, my top feud right now. Other feuds include Unholy Alliance vs. Triple X-2 (Daniels and Skipper), Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit, Steve Corino vs. Low-Ki, and Bret Hart vs. Ric Flair. Until Monday, that's MWA! Wow, I suck at this...