Kinetic

Wouldn't I deserve exactly half the credit for inspiring Incanetic?

Well, you're what...25? Let's say, just hypothetically speaking because I have no way of knowing short of asking you, that your first roll in the hay occurred at 18. This means that you're averaging less than two women per year, which is hardly cause for calling up the promiscuity hotline.

This is clearly a race issue and rightfully so. Motown was founded by a black man, all of the artists on the label during its heyday were black, it was mostly operated by black people, most of the songwriters were black, etc. So to have an anniversary special celebrating the legacy of this portion of black culture hosted by a white guy whose main claim to fame is appropriating black culture for his own use is not so much racist as it is nonsensical.

Yeah, that was me. I ran out of bird watching material pretty quickly, believe it or not.

This is my most recent photo:

I guess it's safe to assume that Sandman didn't take part in any Boxing Day festivities today.

My girlfriend bought me cigarettes, 40s, and porn. That was impossible to top, and it turned out that my more proper gifts from family members didn't even come close.

The only danger in giving Dave Coulier a part in anything is that his suddenly increased profile could again somehow enable him to break the heart of a sweet but ultimately vindictive Canadian singer-songwriter and former children's television star, thus subjecting the lot of us to another "You Oughta Know" and subsequently forcing me to summon up the statistic that the aforementioned singer-songwriter's album sold 20 Million+ copies when making an assessment of how depressing the previous decade's musical output was. I can see no real harm in having them boned by John Stamos, however.

Every time I think we've hit the bottom of the barrel...

That's a bit of an undemocratic point of view to have, in addition to being the sort of self-fulfilling prophecy that maintains the two-party system that alienates so many American voters.

You don't think total lack of media coverage has anything to do with that?

We call that sort of justification the "weapons of mass destruction loophole."

Couldn't you just spend the money slowly? I find it unlikely that someone's going to investigate my every sandwich purchase, nor would they find it suspicious when I upgraded my choice of 40s from King Cobra to Old English. Any potential problem would come from making some sort of major investment, such as a car or a brothel.

No, but I do have his knack for outlandishly florid prose. But, alas, where I once had a surplus of words with which to festoon this post, I am now treading perilously close to a defecit. And so it is with a heavy heart that I bid you all farewell and good night.

I'd have to say that owning a domesticated animal would fall under the heading of "ethical," whereas the unapologetic barbarism that takes place in slaughterhouses and various other places where animals are stored prior to being murdered for human consumption would not. What's more, I totally agree with Bill Maher's statement about Christopher Reeves. The fact that he's paralyzed is unfortunate, but he lost that particular battle of wills between himself and the horse. The fact that some people revere him as a hero just because he broke his neck is the real outrage.

That's to the extent that you even want to consider Nirvana a grunge band. Their sound was completely different than that of the other bands that they were lumped in with, i.e. Pearl Jam, Alice in Chains, Soundgarden, and so on. The nu metal stuff on the radio now owes a much larger debt to those bands than Nirvana, whose only similarity with them is thematic. And, even so, Cobain's lyrics were a lot more oblique. I'm a Nirvana apologist.

I can't believe this made it to six pages. Incandenza's like some sort of evil genius or something.

While identical, each of the twins has subtle traits that reveal themselves in things like facial expressions and eye gleams and so on. For instance, you can tell from Ashley's devilish smirk that she's the sort of girl who's likely to take on the entire varsity football team in a story entitled "Ashley Olsen's Locker Room Gangbang Pts. 1-12." By the same token, Mary-Kate's naive eyes makes her more likely to engage in a steamy affair with her new roommate, a curvaceous French piano prodigy.

Right, but you can't really give credit to Bob Dylan for everything from Rubber Soul on. Were I to smoke a lot of pot and become some sort of successful artist, I wouldn't track my dealer down and attempt to pay him residuals.

I'd actually suggest using that "gargantuan proportions" line in any description of the cock. And maybe "pure, vice-like entrance" in reference to her genitalia.

I find the notion that Lennon and McCartney smoking pot enabled ideas to begin falling out of the sky pretty amusing.

Wang: "my burgeoning manhood."

Before the end of January, and "delectable, glistening mound(s)."

And I think if you include Malcolm McLaren and Richard Hell, I'll have no more complaints. Edit: Oh, and Marc Bolan! Christ, is he not on there?

I absolutely believe that Barry Gordy should be on this list, but I can sort of understand why he's not. With the way the Motown structure was set up, it can be fairly difficult to figure out who did what, and it's probably impossible to prove that Barry Gordy had more to do with developing the Motown sound than x person. So if you're including him, you'd need to include Smokey Robinsons, Holland/Dozier/Holland, and countless others who had an equal or greater part in creating that deal. I'd probably have one spot labelled "Motown" and leave it at that.