Kinetic

That's actually exactly what I was thinking, although I'd throw "slow" in there as well. I'm not sure how this helps their secondary any, although they're the goddamn rat bastard Patriots so I'm sure it won't end up mattering.

My Hatriotism aside, Lynch seems very much like Belichick's type of guy on defense.

Man, I can't even smoke a cigarette on my own porch without having some black asshole ask me for money. This guy talked my ear off for five minutes. "Manmanmanuhuhuh...got these kids, right? Got these kids. The one girl, she don't even do nothin' but sit on the couch, talkin' bout manmanmanuhuh got these kids, right? What I'm gonna do is uhuhuh what I'm gonna do is, I'm gonna cut that man grass. I'm gonna cut that man grass. Got me a gas tank. I'm tryin' to do right. I'm tryin' to do right. I just need a dollar." Fucking panhandlers.

Well, now you're just being ridiculous.

John Lynch is visiting the Patriots today. Lynch is my favorite Buc ever and I'd like to see him land somewhere if he still wants to play, but it would pain me to see him in a Patriots uniform. Anyone got any early song predictions for the Springsteen Super Bowl halftime show? I'm thinking he might go more the Prince route and cover a lot of territory with songs both predictable and obscure, rather than the Stones/McCartney/Tom Petty "big recognizable hits plus one recent song" formula. I'd like to see "Glory Days" with Brett Favre on tambourine. I really would.

Sounds like you've got an idea for a zombie movie there, mister.

Here's the bio on Jung Billz: His given name is Alvin Hoobler and he's a 44 year old recovering crack addict/welfare recipient/aspiring rapper from Wausau, Wisconsin (also the hometown of Metal Ed, who knew?). He's been mentored by fellow former addict and Wisconsin rap legend Crackity Too Tall, whose once promising career was derailed when he refused to remove the controversial song "Cowbooty" (a rather graphic account of a leisure activity enjoyed by all young Wisconsinite males) from an album he submitted to Def Jam in the 80s. The two have been collaborating on an album to be titled Pipe Dreams: Da Life and Times of Alvin Hoobler Volume 1, which features local hits such as "Gas Station," "B.I.T.C.H. (Da Shawty is Shoddy)," and "Big Ballin." It is to be released on the cassette-only independent label Richconsin Records. Hope this clears up any confusion.

Oh, ouch. I never thought I'd say this, but I would not want to be Jericholic82 right now, lemme tell ya.

Hey, the guy only has six months left in office. Let him have his fun. If these "protected species" can't cowboy up for half a year, maybe they didn't deserve to be protected in the first place.

I wasn't aware of this until just now. Pretty solid gimmick.

I HAD NEVER SEEN A SHOOTING STAR BEFORE. 25 years of rotations, passes through comets' paths, and travel, and to my memory I had never witnessed burning debris scratch across the night sky. Radiohead were hunched over their instruments. Thom Yorke slowly beat on a grand piano, singing, eyes closed, into his microphone like he was trying to kiss around a big nose. Colin Greenwood tapped patiently on a double bass, waiting for his cue. White pearls of arena light swam over their faces. A lazy disco light spilled artificial constellations inside the aluminum cove of the makeshift stage. The metal skeleton of the stage ate one end of Florence's Piazza Santa Croce, on the steps of the Santa Croce Cathedral. Michelangelo's bones and cobblestone laid beneath. I stared entranced, soaking in Radiohead's new material, chiseling each sound into the best functioning parts of my brain which would be the only sound system for the material for months. The butterscotch lamps along the walls of the tight city square bled upward into the cobalt sky, which seemed as strikingly artificial and perfect as a wizard's cap. The staccato piano chords ascended repeatedly. "Black eyed angels swam at me," Yorke sang like his dying words. "There was nothing to fear, nothing to hide." The trained critical part of me marked the similarity to Coltrane's "Ole." The human part of me wept in awe. I was there. I think I might have met this prick, too. He told us how he didn't own a TV.

Yeah, Sorgi is on the roster because he's a nobody that they can get on the cheap. The Colts suddenly showing interest in upgrading at the backup QB position (Quinn Gray and/or Jared Lorenzon) has fueled a lot of speculation about the status of Manning's ailing sac.

Got away from you, maybe. But, yeah, what do Scientoligists think happens to people when they die? Is Isaac out in that black righteous space now or is he with L. Ron or what?

Man, famous black people are dropping like flies. Bernie Mac, Isaac Hayes, Estelle Getty, Koko B. Ware...the list goes on and on. Wonder what sort of impact this will have on the election. I think things are trending downward for Obama. RIP, Mr. Hayes. I'll be missing you.

The Steelers are apparently going to sign both Byron Leftwich and Daunte Culpepper to back up Roethlisberger, according to PFT.

Yeah, and some of the more optimistic predictions I've seen (other than those coming out of Chicago) have him just missing this season. But if the Bears did their homework, they knew he had a back problem when they drafted him.

"Burnin' for You" I'm with Czech on this one. Due to more than a couple of midnight viewings of The Stoned Age as a teenager, I'm also quite fond of "Don't Fear the Reaper."

Oh. Well, way to make me look stupid, guy.

Different ghost. The Ghost of Harold whatever is the former RedBaron, who's celebrating 23 fabulous years on Earth today.

I heard a guy complaining about a cover band at a nearby restaurant playing "Sitting on the Dock of the Bay" the other day at work. He said something along the lines of "You hear that? A white man singing that song? That's an insult and an affront to my people!" I was like, "You gonna pay for that Whatchmacalit or what, Schoolly?"

The Jets would have to give up three first round picks if they trade him. Who the fuck would agree to that? What if they release him...same deal? Not that they would, but, y'know, just wondering. I don't think the Packers would have any recourse there, but the Tangini consortium, already unpopular in some league circles because of last year's Spygate debacle, would have enemies for life in Ted Thompson and Mike McCarthy. Plus, it wouldn't make any sense.

Right, and more doctors, lawyers, sanitation experts, maintenance engineers, etc. Did you know that China has as many professional basketball fans as America has Americans? And you want to tell me that we need contraception? If we're going to compete in this changing global economy, we need as many people as we can get. If they're unwanted and unloved, so much the better. They'll have a chip on their shoulder and something to prove.

A couple of points you guys are missing: 1. A child is always a blessing. 2. Sex is a sin. So what's the problem?

Chris Mortensen just said that the Jets will give the Pats a run for their money in the AFC East.

I've always liked Pennington. Yeah, his arm isn't anything special and he's got a long injury history, but he's smart and makes good decisions. I think he'd be an upgrade at starter for a few teams.