Kinetic

DJ Jeff would have been 27 today.

There's apparently some language in the trade that makes it prohibitively costly for the Jets to trade him to the Vikings or anyone else. So Favre is and will continue to be a Jet unless he decides to retire again. Chad Pennington will be cut soon. I'm stunned. I don't know that the difference in wins and losses with Garcia rather than Favre will be that great (the defense and the running game will carry this team anyway) but I had gotten to the point where I was downright excited about the idea of Favre playing in Tampa. And now...nothing.

There's no question about that. I've heard somewhere--ESPN, I think--that Favre would rather go back into retirement than play for the Jets. If he ends up anywhere, it's going to be Tampa. It's basically a matter of them working out trade details. I've heard the names Brian Griese and Ryan Nece thrown around, as well as a 2nd, 3rd, or 4th round draft pick.

Who you crappin'? New England twice a year doesn't equal playing in a hard division. The Dolphins are a mess and the Bills are slightly above average at best. The AFC East might be the weakest division in the league. Jeff Garcia came into camp out of shape and bitching about his contract. I'd take my chances with wishy-washy, over-the-hill Brett Favre before hitching the team's wagon to injury-prone latent homosexual Jeff Garcia.

See? But I guess we should know by tomorrow, as Favre wants to get this over with and get into training camp somewhere. The Jets are apparently offering Green Bay a better deal, but Favre somewhat justifiably doesn't want to play for them. I've been getting somewhat irked by all of the articles referring to the NFC South as "weak" or "diluted" (because the NFC North/West/AFC East/AFC West aren't?) but, yeah, he'd obviously have a better shot at winning the South with Tampa than he would at winning the AFC East with the Jets. So...barring an unexpected defection to the CFL or a decision to pursue Wrangler League tractor racing full-time, I'm guessing Favre will be a Buc sometime prior to our bye week.

You might get a third. Remember Green Bay is coming to Tampa on September 28th. Well, they can only flex the back half of the Sunday night schedule, but I would definitely imagine that the GB-TB game would be in FOX's national 4:15 slot. I might actually be able to watch my team at home more than a few times a year. All hail Lord Favre.

So the trade is likely to be finalized in the next 24 hours, which gives Favre time to change his mind two or three times. I'm not going to get too excited until they put this thing in writing.

Hol-ee shit. I can't believe it's actually happening.

I would imagine that the Bucs or Jets could get him for next to nothing, as the Packers have no leverage in any negotiation. They need to get rid of Favre more than anyone else needs to acquire him. A bonus to the Bucs trading for Favre is that goddamn NBC wouldn't dare flex us out of our (I think) two Sunday nighters this season.

According to Jay Glazer, it now seems very unlikely that Favre will play for the Packers this year. The sticking point is that Favre wants to play in the NFC North, but the Packers would like to trade him to one of the two non-division teams that's shown interest--the Jets or the Bucs. So even though Brett is now in Green Bay and on the active roster, it feels like this story has taken the wayback machine to about two weeks ago. This is all stuff that we already knew. My amended bold prediction, based on nothing, is that Aaron Rodgers will suck a dick this year and the Packers will come to regret jettisoning Favre. Heads will roll come next offseason.

I'm going to go with Eli Manning making it rain and shooting up a strip club.

It's not hard to envision Hart leapfrogging Dominic Rhodes on their depth chart. My bold prediction, based on nothing, is that he'll end up not only making the team, but splitting time with Addai. Kenton Keith will be released.

ESPN's "College Gameday" is a running "coolest helmet" tournament in the classic "TSM Poster Tournament" format. Allow me to put my $0.02 in. Personally, I've always been partial to helmets with stickers on them. I have always believed--and those of you who have been reading my work since I was a pup writing wrestling articles in Bumfuck, Texas can attest to this--that stickers are pretty. They just are.

So how do Georgia players celebrate their preseason #1 ranking? By getting into a bar room slobberknocker, that's how. True story: Against my better judgement, I one night ended up in the bar where all of this took place. After about 30 seconds of hearing two incredibly shrill sorority girls loudly yelling "Play Soulja Boy!!! Wooo!! Omigod, Soulja Boy!!!" I made a beeline for the door. It was time to go home.

Interesting Skip Caray anecdote: I was listening to him call a Braves-Cardinals game last week, and after a particularly woeful series of at-bats for what remains of the Braves lineup, he said something to the effect of "I don't know how much more of this I can take." Not much more, apparently. He can watch them strand baserunners in heaven now. RIP Skip.

We meet again, Mr. Bojangles.

I just drink cause I love to party. Woooo!

How much did you eat yesterday? Seven beers on an empty stomach will typically cause me to black out, as well.

The press release sent out by the Packers makes it sound like they're now grudgingly going to allow Favre to compete for the starting job. Having resigned myself to the fact that he's not going to end up in Tampa, I'm really hoping that he somehow ends up in Minnesota just for the sheer drama of the Monday night season opener in Green Bay.

...the room is spinning... Actually, Gruden says it's a minor injury. A hamstring strain, I think. Take that for what you will.

I got really drunk and downloaded a pitch-shifter last night. Discuss.

No. You'll be lucky to see any regular season starters for more than a quarter. The last preseason game is used mostly to determine which fringe guys will round out the 53 man roster and which ones will be cut.

Catz in the hood.

I'd wager to say that more white people get HBO. Speaking of which: Curb Your Enthusiasm. Holy shit, that's a white interest if I ever saw one.

Haha, fuckers. I'm sure this will elicit a lot of "What the fuck, bro?" reactions here in Athens. Due to what happened in last year's game and all of the shit I've had to deal with being a Gators fan here, Florida smacking the fuck out of the Dawgs in Jacksonville this year would probably be the all-time high point of my sports fandom.