Nighthawk

I'm pleased to report that Dino is even crazier in real life than he seems on film. I chatted with him a little. Talked about Jimi Hendrix. Once he stripped naked, they let him introduce the band members. Before he did that, he did this crazy high pitched shriek, like "UUUUUUUUURWHOOOO!" Ten times. Then he fondled his balls and introduced the lineup, referring to himself as "GG Allin". When the band was done, they left the stage, and Dino proceeded to stick his drumsticks up his ass, then took them out and went into The Lick. Most people just wandered away. Didn't stop him. I wanted a picture with him, but realized that I should have asked before the show, because I didn't want to get too close to him while he was sweaty and naked. Seeing him live, though, the guy is really rad. I sort of love him too. He's so delicate. There's the tiniest window of society where a person like Dino can function and be happy, and he's living it. PS, Merle Allin is the coolest guy ever.

One of the bands that opened for the Murder Junkies sounded like, I swear, Lil Jon fronting the Misfits. Once I said it out loud, everybody was like "Yes, that's exactly it." It was an interesting sound. The guy said "YEAH-UH!" a lot.

I do think that's ok, although I don't particularly experience it myself. I mean, usually an ex is an ex because there was some sort of falling out. You usually feel bad. Revenge is a natural emotion, there's often no escaping it. It's why guys kill their exes. But you know, we can be mature. But sometimes the world takes our revenge for us. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth. If you don't care one way or the other, either you didn't care all that much about them in the first place, or the breakup just went really smoothly. Basically, if you shouldn't care, you won't. One of my favorite stories of breaking up came when we went out to eat, and proceeded to sit in silence for like ten minutes. We hadn't been fighting or anything. Then I break the silence with "This isn't working out." and she says "No it isn't. "Well, you still want to eat?" "Sure." and then we talked, while we were eating. Just chatted. I still don't really get it.

The songs, for the record, were: "I Get Wet" "Pictures of You" "Do It" "Like A Prayer"

Well, hip hop is an entire genre. It's like saying "I used to listen to jazz." There's millions of variations. But there is a standard reason for this. To give some background, I've gone through a lot of phases of what kind of music I listen to, before coming to this point where I listen to everything. I've gone through the indie phase, the death metal phase, the electronic phase, and many more. But the constant is that while I'm listening to that, I listen to rap too. It's just always been there. (By the way, I say rap, not hip hop. Hip hop is a culture, rap is the music. Plus hip hop sounds like something a rabbit listens to.) People sometimes outgrow rap. It is a very juvenile type of music, largely, which is much of the point the movie Baby Boy made. The whole "I constantly fuck women and have a lot of money." thing gets old. Since rap is lyrically based, the content makes much more of a difference. For example, my all time favorite album is Appetite For Destruction, which I can't relate to at all anymore. Doesn't matter, cause it sounds great. Today, I often have to remind myself to listen to rap. I get focused on these very specific subgenres and say "Oh yeah, rap is happening too. Listen to that." The fact that local rappers often stand outside the record store and hustle cds they burned themselves helps. I'll give 'em a few bucks. And you know what? Sometimes it isn't bad. Keeps me real with the streets, nigga. I lived on the street most recently about four months ago, and that's what was going down. Keeping that shit real. Now, a lot of the connection I have to rap comes with the fact that I actually lived in the ghetto they describe. As a young white person from England, I'm pretty sure you didn't. So living these fantasies vicariously can run its course. However, you may want to try getting into more conscious rap. You know, KMD, Mos Def, whatever. It may reinterest you. Although a lot of that's really political, too. Short answer: You can't relate to it and grew out of it.

Ok, time to add another to the list of musicians I've cried over. Last night I got pretty drunk and wept over Madonna. So it's Andrew WK, the Cure, Spice Girls... Madonna. I just want to gaybash myself.

I'm going to see GG's last band, the Murder Junkies, tonight. GG's brother Merle plays bass, and he's one of those guys who is shockingly down to Earth and normal, yet does a shit ton of weird stuff. He's one of my myspace friends, and one of the best bulletins I ever got was him saying "Send me your bloodiest, most disgusting tampons. I need them for a project I'm working on. Whoever sends the filthiest, worst tampon gets to be in my top friends!" No words on what the project was. Just Merle needs disgusting tampons. But the real loon in that band is the drummer, Dino. He plays nude, for one thing. But seriously, GG was very volatile and hostile, but compared to Dino, totally had a tight grip on reality. To quote part of Hated... "Dino, the naked drummer? Dino believes he is immortal. He believes he is free of all law. He believes he is telepathically connected to the Lunachicks, and he believes that they love him. Dino did time for exposing himself to a little girl. Dino exposed his schwing to a nine year old girl, did time for it, and then later, when asked about it, said 'Oh, I was just teasing her.'" This was him when he was playing with GG: (Aside: that looks like the awesomest place ever.) This is him today: He's had that look for years now. Caption it. Friend of mine who's going to the show with me riffed on this picture for like 45 minutes. "He looks like Yosemite Sam." "He's the Joker's abusive uncle." "Birthplace: Axis Chemicals. Makeup by: Acme" "He just jerked off a space alien." "He went bobbing for apples in a tub of watercolors." And so on. He's actually a really good drummer. His signature is a 30 minute solo he calls The Lick. It's entertaining. For the entire 30 minutes. Also, he is a bike messenger when he's not drumming. Picture that guy coming up like "Here's your mail!" Totally makes sense. I own that dvd. Takes a special kind of person to read that synopsis and say "Yeah, I gotta see that!" With Merle Allin in 1994. I'm hangin' out with these guys tonight! I'm so excited!

No. I do have some fine attire, which I will wear to special occasions, but my standard "going out" wear is jeans and a t shirt. Granted, I do have some pretty volatile shirts, several of which contain profanity (the best are probably one with a picture of Jerry Falwell and the caption "Rest in shit, motherfucker." and the back has his dates of birth and death and the quote "If you are not a born again Christian, you are a failure as a human being.", and one which says "Yes, I'm wearing this goddamn shirt in front of your fucking kids." Every single shirt I own has gotten comments from strangers, but those seem to get it most.) When I go on stage, I pay pretty much no attention to what I wear. Since I got a couple tattoos, I usually go without a shirt, but even before than, it meant nothing. I'd typically do shows straight from work and just wear whatever I had to wear at work. Shirt and tie, polo with company logo on the breast, whatever. I guess I do actively try to wear the least expected thing. So in that sense, clothes sort of make the man. But I think it's more, "The man makes the clothes." As an aside to that, I really love cursing. If I end up with kids, I will teach them to swear terribly. You know, make them good in every other way, but just with a filthy mouth. Like, somebody says "Little girl, you can't skip rope here." and she goes "Fuck off, cunt!" And I hope I get called to school with "Uh, we regret to inform you, but little Slayer called his teacher a motherfucker." so I can say "What the fuck's wrong with that?" It's no worse than peepee head. Seriously. Just like in Harry Potter, fear of a name only increases fear of the thing itself. Patton Oswalt: "I'm going to shoot my goof juice in your hoo hah!" is infinitely more creepy than "I'm going to shoot cum in your pussy." While I think they're a load of bitches, I do admire their independence. I watch every single hood movie that comes out, and Baby Boy is seriously underrated. Tyrese is calling this one girl as a booty call, and she's like "Nigga, who the fuck you think you is? If I want some dick, I'ma call you!" and just hangs up the phone. That's awesome. Also, the time I got lost in Harlem at one in the morning, I saw this chick (dressed like a whore, mind you) just walking down the street. And these dudes were like "Hey beautiful, what's up?" and she turned on these dudes and was like "Fuck you nigga! How the fuck you think you can say that shit to me..." and on and on and she turned these guys out. Completely. Over "Hey beautiful." Not "Hey bitch." That is pretty awesome. I've dated a few of those hood rats, and I'm not ashamed to admit I can't handle them. More civilized black girls, I like, though. As amazing as it is, in this day and age, in San Francisco, people still get pissed off seeing a white guy with a black girl. Which I of course take as an opportunity to flagrantly make out with them and grope them, which enrages the old white people even further. Also, a lot of these girls really wouldn't tolerate me doing that if it wasn't to educate old racist people. Double points.

Yes! I can't believe I forgot him. Also Keith Moon. Now that Steve-O did a rap album, I can say him. I'm actually looking forward to listening to it. I think he has an interesting voice. Also, some people seem to do a lot of weird shit, but are by all appearances quite sane. They just seem to like it. I guess they qualify as "screwed up". Here I think of El Duce. Although he did get drunk and get hit by a train. And was apparently approached to kill Kurt Cobain. Yeah, he was nuts. There was a local band in Tampa called Hell On Earth and they'd do shit like put rats in a blender and fuck dead cows on stage. They couldn't really leave the state. That's why a lot of wrestling goes on in Florida, too. It's relatively easy to get away with crazy shit. Yoko Ono's pretty far gone, too.

You're both gay? That is part of it, actually.

Also, how did anybody think they were going to go gay at the end? Haven't you ever gotten totally drunk and told your friend you love them? Like, "No seriously. I love you. No, you don't understand what this means. I love you." That's not gay at all, it's just sweet. I do that all the time.

First, jerking off is better than sex in many ways. There's no expectations. No disapointments. No one judges you. You can do all kinds of weird shit in your head that you never get to in real life. Secondly, I will not get back with an ex. I just don't do it. I tell them up front "You get one chance with Dave. Do not break up with me to make me jealous or some shit, because that'll be it. I'm gone." And yeah, I've broken my rule once or twice. Ends in ten kinds of wrong sewn into a ball and slammed through the hoop of atrocity. But it's love that makes people do that, sure, and comfort. It's not hard to be in a relationship with someone you already have been. You don't have to relearn a new set of quirks. People remember the good times, and they're like "Why couldn't we do that again?" and they get back together and it's like "Oh yeah. That's why." I can get over pretty much anything, I was recently having a discussion about which comic book character I was most like in a relationship (yes, I was really having that discussion), and the answer is Wolverine. Crass, take no shit, and gets over anything instantly. I can work through anything. But break up? No. That's forever.

Yeah, I guess it's more the legend of Robert Johnson. Still, the bit about him foaming at the mouth and saying the devil was after him is good stuff. He Who Cannot Be Named is a wife beating alcoholic. That sucks, but it's not really crazy. Still, all the Dwarves are at least a little crazy. There's a fine line between crazy and drug addict, too. I mean, drugs'll make anybody crazy. Should I be mentioning James Brown? Or Rick James? Iggy Pop is good, though he's ok now. He was crazy and a drug addict.

It is a classic. It's our generation's Fast Times. Fuck American Pie. However, and I know I will be in an extreme minority, Hot Rod was funnier. Superbad had heart and shit, and taught you things about yourself, and was a better movie, but Hot Rod seriously almost killed me.

Seriously, you could show me that and ask which celebrity it is, and I'd get to six or seven before I got it. Speaking of giant wigs and drugs... have fun: http://www.cracked.com/index.php?name=News&sid=880

She looks like a totally different person.

He was in Mayhem. He was Count Grischnacht. After he killed Euronymous, Euronymous' mother went to Hellhammer, and said "Look, as a show of respect to our family, please mix out all of that guy's bass tracks." And Hellhammer said "Yes, I totally will." and completely didn't, not as a show of disrespect or whatever, he just had no idea how. That's pretty awesome. Hellhammer also ate part of Dead's brain and made a necklace out of his skull fragments. METAL! This thread rules, by the way. I hadn't heard of half of the people being mentioned.

I actually support wearing weird, weird shit for no reason (I have a collection), but I think teachers should look completely normal. It's comforting.

Man, I just realized something cool. I've totally isolated a ton of girls... but they will talk to you if you play the "I'm a god damned human being!" card. I told them "Look, I may have done these things, but I'm still a person! I feel, just like you do, and it hurts me when you don't talk to me. I'm just a human being, like you, I'm not an animal, and I get lonely. Just say hi once in a while. It means a lot to me." And they're like "Ok, sorry I'm so mean to you, David, but you honestly do act like an asshole all the time." And I say "Look, I'm sorry, I won't anymore. I really just want to be your friend, but nobody understands me, and I want attention, so I sometimes act a fool." And they get it. I mean, all those thing I just said are true, don't just lie... but this vulnerability thing really works. Try telling the truth. It fucking works. Like "My name is George. I'm unemployed and I live with my parents." truth. It's just so different that it gets responses.

Oh fuck, shrooms and dxm are the ultimate drug combo. This is going to be awesome for you. Just please don't turn into Jingus.

Hey, it's not just me. I have multiple friends who are the same as me and they had no idea about it either. We'll get to know each other, researching this man.

This is an obscure one, and I likely won't get helped, but I'll throw it out there. On Patton Oswalt's new album Werewolves and Lollipops there's a bit about him idolizing really crazy, screwed up musicians, and he mentions Roky Erickson and GG Allin, who I know, and one other person. I can't even really understand what he's saying. It sounds like Hazzel Atkins, but I have no idea who that is and it gives me no search results, so that's likely not it. Any idea?

Shrooms are great because they're a psychedelic but you can still basically function on them. Probably the best was the time I hallucinated that I was inside the movie James and the Giant Peach. I was on some other stuff, but I think that was the primary thing. That movie's a trip anyway, and that was just great. I kind of fell in love with the spider in the movie during that trip, and then when it was over (the movie, not the trip), I went on aim and told Leena that I was in love with her. I was sort of confusing her with the spider, because they were both foreign. It's true that I think Leena's awesome, but a lot of it's probably residuals from a drug trip where I thought she was a spider. Still, we were good enough friends before that that I could say something like that and she would take it at face value. Recently I was discussing with a friend of mine my associations of certain drugs with different locations. Like, coke: night club, weed: rap concert, meth: somebody's basement, and so on. Mushrooms was the desert. He was sort of surprised, but that was my usual MO. When I was going to do mushrooms, I'd go out into the desert, or when I moved to Florida, the swamp, and take them and just sit there introspectively. I learned some amazing things. Hey pbone, if you read this, I remember you talking to me about wanting psychedelic experiences, and that's my advice. Go out into nature and take mushrooms and just sit there. You live in Hawaii, there's so many places with amazing scenery. I don't do drugs anymore, but I would probably consider doing mushrooms again if I was in a position to stare into a volcano, or I was in the Himalayas or Antarctica or something.

Let's all recall Rick James licking girls faces from the Dave Chappelle sketch. In the extended interview, though, he admits it was usually a girl he knew and he was just fucking with Charlie. Of course, that's only the way he remembers it. Cocaine's a helluva drug. I should try this.

Do all of those things. Just the other day I had been up all night and had to go out at four AM to talk to some guy about a job. I had to drive into San Francisco, and I looked at the gauge and said "Shit. I gotta get gas." So I did, and at the gas station, I was like "Hm, this seems familiar. Why do I feel like I used to stop here every day..." Before realizing that I did indeed stop there every day, buy an energy drink and get cash back to pay the toll on the bridge. I would have totally forgotten and been fined $100. Actually I probably would have parked the car and gone walking back to the cars behind me begging money. But that's not pleasant either. But the point is, I know all about chugging Rock Stars at four in the morning with the AC on full blast and the window down. Van Halen or Aerosmith work well.