BUTT

I don't know what that means, Marv.

TSM

I thought this update would be to alert us of Tay's impending side project with James Iha and the dude from Fountains of Wayne.

DUR DUR DIRTY HOMOS ALL GOT THE AIDS

How do you fit Rush in there? They aren't a comedy band. At least not intentionally.

Agnes, you have to rein in the act a little bit or it stops being special.

He was not making anywhere near that. You learned that from Keith, didn't you.

Skip to 3:30.

I hear you bro. Remember when this shit was taboo? Girls kissing doesn't even give me a semi anymore! That said, Katy Perry writing The Official Song of Fake Lesbians is a pretty brilliant marketing move, much like Destiny's Child releasing a song called "Survivor" at the advent of the reality show boom.

Cave Story for Wii Ware is unmentioned. That might not mean much, since they only named four Wii Ware games in the press release. But it would have been reassuring if they had listed it.

As I've previously revealed, my penis is detachable. It interfaces with my body through a 6-pin DIN connector. All the circuitry is contained in my balls, which is why I am able to clean my penis in the dishwasher without damaging it.

When Taker turned heel and cut his hair he still had "Rollin'" as a theme. Are you talking about that piece of ass-rock they gave him as a theme around the time he ended Hogan's last title run? That theme later had vocals added and was titled "You're Gonna Pay," and much like the DX-Rage rumors there was much speculation that this theme was performed by Guns N' Roses even though the singer on it sounded nothing like Axl. It was a remarkably bad theme for an Undertaker-level star. Re: Jarrett, I really don't think the country singer gimmick was bad at all. Maybe in '93 the idea of using a wrestling career as a stepping stone to another form of entertainment was ludicrous, but today half the women in WWE are there to get exposure for acting and modeling jobs. Of course, since he didn't sing at all until the summer of '95 (and even then he wasn't really singing) it's fair to say that his plan wasn't so successful. But there are always bullshit artists in the world of entertainment, aren't there? Terrible outfits, though. The blinking hat was appropriately tacky for the gimmick.

Other rumors including a merger with ECW, a deal with Fox and Michael Jordan appearing at the show. Really.

Do this one, Brody. I bet you want some wrestling content to work with. This pisses me off more than a message forum has ever pissed me off before. Even though it's just text from someone that I will never meet, it pisses me off. Not just because I'm a Morley mark, but because people are so dimwitted they have to always use the same excuses for everything. His matches are repetitive? Fuck you. Alright. Just straight fuck you. This is the WWE. EVERY match is repetitive. Every fucking one. That's what happens when you only get four minutes to work. I think, no fuck that, I KNOW Val is the best wrestler on RAW. Yeah, that's right. Better than Jericho, better than RVD & better than Lance Storm. You can call me crazy all you want, but I know what I have seen. Morley always...ALWAYS entertains me. On the stick, in the ring, everywhere. He should be a main eventer by now. Especially after having to go through all the "Val Venis" bullshit. He is WAY above average in the wrestling department. "Average at best?" Fucking please. Rodney Mack is average at best. Test is average at best. Morley is better than half the roster (including Smackdown). Average at best means that when he has his best nights, it's only average. Or, it could mean if you added up all of his matches and rated them on quality, then divided by the number of matches you would end up with a number that was "average" based on a scale that would have to be made up as well. Fuck that. Did you even think before you typed that? His offense is rather dull aside from a few moves like the Blue Thunder? Why's that? Because not every single move he uses is exclusive to him? I beg to differ. He executes all of his moves well. He has a great finisher. The 'Money Shot' is highly underrated. Everytime I see it I just have flashbacks to Jimmy Snuka days. Just because he doesn't do twenty moonsaults and six corkscrews before hitting a body splash doesn't mean that it can't still be impressive. I swear, it's like people have selective viewing habits. If you don't think Morley is talented, you shouldn't be allowed to form an opinion about wrestling on a wrestling forum. The same people that preach about Chris Jericho, Booker T. & The Hurricane had better damn well see something in Morley. Now I'm bitter. I can't believe that someone would go out of their way to call Morley average. I've never even seen Morley botch a spot! Remember his feud with D-Lo way back when for the IC title? Yeah, he was even good back then. I've also never heard about Morley being hard to work with or causing problems backstage. In fact, whenever I do read something about him, it's usually just something like him going to another wrestlers wedding. That just shows that he's a nice guy with a lot of friends. I guess we all know where nice guys finish. I just think it's a case of the good old TSM double standard again. I have no doubt in my mind that if people talked about Morley as much as they talk about some other 'Smark Darlings" everyone would act like they liked him. Why? Because this place is full of fucking sheep. Just a bunch of damn bandwagon jumpers. It makes me sick. It's like everyone just tries to fit in. Everyone likes the same five wrestlers...and I know that they are talented, but I guarantee half of the people that act like they like Guerrero or Jericho only say that to try and fit in here. The reasoning is because they don't want to be "ran off" for having a different opinion. Don't act like it wouldn't happen either, because it's happened in the past. It's not just a difference of opinion either. You might not like Morley as much as me, that's fine. You might think other wrestlers are better than him, that's fine too. Those are opinions, I'll admit that. Saying the man is not talented or is average is not an opinion. Not to me. To me it's false information. It's bullshit. He obviously has talent. OBVIOUSLY. If you can't see that, quit watching wrestling because you wouldn't know talent it it took you out into the middle of the street and blew your brains out.

Eh, They wouldn't do that. Metroid isn't an evergreen title that disrupts the marketplace blah blah blah. It's a Core Title. Maybe they just won't release it because of its lack of casual appeal. Perhaps Reggie saw the disappointing sales of MP3 despite that AMAZING marketing campaign they did for it and just thinks people don't want Metroid. OK, maybe not. But it is an American game. There's no excuse for taking so long with it. Hey Drew, did you see the "In a world"-style voiceover they added for the Wii version of Prime? I think it was originally in the European version of the game, but it's pointless and lame. Surprising is the lack of Wii Sports Resort on the list. I thought that was supposed to come out in Spring. Doesn't The Conduit use MotionPlus? That doesn't necessarily mean the add-on has to be out when the game comes out, but it should. It wouldn't surprise me if that was the big fall game since it's a pretty damn big deal.

Disney's Doug didn't have Billy West. Lame. I remember when I used to go over to my mom's friend's house for the morning carpool to 1st grade. She had a 3-year-old daughter and they always had the Disney Channel on. (They also had two young sons of about 8 and 10 but they didn't have an NES! What kind of family was this?) This was when DC was a premium channel so it was sort of an enigma to my young self. I definitely was not impressed with what I saw. There was some sort of live-action Alice in Wonderland show (I think they had a rapping Mad Hatter or a rapping Tweedledee and Tweedledum. Someone rapped.) They also used to play some "Locomotion" video but I can't remember if it was Kylie's Stock-Aitken-Waterman arrangement or what. We started getting it free in '98 but all I remember watching was Growing Pains. Why does this thread exist?

shocker

Conan wasn't on at the time of Mania IX.

I wonder how often Jim Johnston employed real drums in his works. Those cymbal crashes always sound the same in WWF themes. Obvious samples IMO.

Someone should 'shop that gif into Dwyer holding a big ol' cock and squirting jizz into his mouth. Or a bottle of cheese whiz if you want to be a little more safe for work.

Keep in mind this pbone gent is barely 18. At his age, dudes aren't very reasonable or logical.

They always prepare their speeches in advance, don't they? You don't really have much time to write a speech in the ten minutes between speech end and time for rebuttal.