The Amazing Rando

It's not my fault you're SPECIAL!

It's... GEEEEEEEEENE~!

Snitsky is the new KAAAAAANE

Yeah right, Edge can't count.

and what do we do after those two seconds are up? Repeat it another 3599 times, and then use the over-run of Raw for the greatness that is Chuck Palumbo.

This week should be all about celebrating the greatness that is Tyson Tomko. Seriously.

Okay, here's an idea just spoke about with TCR. For the Rumble and WM next year, viewers have the chance to get them full price and if they do, then the next PPV (No Way Out for Rumble, Backlash for WM) is only a penny. If the viewer doesn't get RR or WM, then NwO and BL are regular price. It would be good just to see if the buyrate would go up at all, or if it would stay the same. (and it'd be hilarious if it dropped) The idea would be a risk, but I doubt it would hurt there pockets much, considering RR and WM are two of the biggest selling PPVs of the year anyway.

I didn't get here fast enough. I was thinking about calling it "RAW RAW SIS BOOM BAH" though.

^ I once watched a speaker at my college completely RIP a student a new ass for saying "ax" instead of "ask". It was great. The guy looked like he wanted to crawl under his chair and die.

If you can't tell I'm being a sarcastic bastard, then I just don't know what to say. Then stop gallavanting and start with the "hordes of flaming death"

E. La Parka I stand by it, dammit. And i'd rather see the Downhome in my sig, not the one who is gallavanting around this fine eve.

E. LA PARKA!!

I don't consider Donnie Darko much of an "obscure cult hit" anymore. I did when I first watched it, but I now know more and more people who have seen it. They don't necessarily UNDERSTAND it, which is part of it's charm, but they have seen it. I myself rented it, watched it, and then bought it the very next day. It was too good not to have. The Director's Cut could be good, but having the DVD and watching all the deleted scenes is the same thing. You get a bit more information on the whole thing, but it still leaves the viewer with tons of questions, all of which are great reasons to keep watching the movie over and over.

Never seen this one, Heard about it from a few friends. Might not actually be many copies in existence (but it's on IMDB.com) I Killed My Lesbian Wife, Hung Her On A Meat Hook, And Now I Have A Three Picture Deal At Disney" - 1993 - A first-time feature-film director (who's also the writer and producer) is casting the lead actress. We meet him talking to his wife about the picture and the process. We meet the actress, Sandy, negotiating with her roommate and talking by phone to her mother. Then, we watch Sandy audition for the director at the call-back session; also attending are the casting director and the production company's sycophants. The wrinkle is that the director is a homicidal misogynist, his wife is tied up and hanging from the ceiling, and Sandy has something in her purse that bodes a rocky future. Ben Affleck directed this beautifully-titled work while still in college. Talk about a way to get into the business...sheesh.

I really hope nothing is, then.

Ding Ding Ding! Fuck that noise. Awaits Kotz to bash himself with "fo sheez" EDIT: Also, all that -izzle speak. Fuck that noise part deux.

"Ring the bell. Ring the damn bell. Ha. That shit never gets old."

Why isn't this the "OAO RAW IS REVOLUTIONARY" Thread. It seems to fit the theme. Everything they do now is revolutionary, even Michael Cole apparently.

(Edit: The byline should be "Where's Tomko?" , as originally I planned this for Palumbo, but putting him at the scene of the theft seemed illogical even by WWE standards) Okay, one Monday Night, Chris Jericho is defending his lovely IC Championship against Christian AGAIN, and after a sound defeat, Jericho goes to retrieve his title only to find...it's GONE? Jericho's immediate suspect is his opponent, but hey...Jericho was with him in the ring the WHOLE TIME...but wait...where's Tomko? Footage reveals that NOBODY noticed Tomko steal the belt and rush off with it through the crowd, leaving both men out in the cold. Jericho goes after Christian, who of course denies involvement, him too wanting to know where the hell Tomko went. So the former friends rush to Bischoff, who has seen the incident and has reported it to security, but nobody has seen the large Tomko anywhere. Bischoff does not want his title disrespected, and immediately sets Christian, Jericho, and a few other random midcarders out to find him, with whomever does getting a shot at the belt (unless of course it's Jericho). So right then Christian knocks Jericho down and takes off, with the rest of the group in tow, all hunting for Tyson Tomko. The moment becomes a hot topic the rest of the night, and as the show goes off the air he still hasn't been found. The next week, Christian reports he hasn't seen Tomko all week during an interview with Todd Grisham, but as they talk, Tyson appears in the background, darting through, seeing the camera, and then taking off like wildfire. Nobody but JR and King (and the fans) notice (right then). Other wrestlers appear and burst through the interview, going around the corner and giving chase. Christian follows. Later, Christian again meets with Bischoff to announce nobody could find him. After a commercial break, a scan of the crowd in the upper decks shows Tomko with the belt around his waist holding a "have you seen me?" sign, but as the camera swings past he drops the sign and runs. The following week, the search has grown, as Bischoff has sealed off all entrances and exits, so Tomko has to be caught. Security is shown in the back, only for Tomko to be seen ON THE OUTSIDE of the building, partying with a few lucky fans and laughing towards the camera before rushing off. Bischoff sees this and begins to scream to catch him, but it is too late. Finally (the week before PPV) Bischoff demands Tomko appear or lose his job. The Titantron lights up, as Tomko is holding a cameraman hostage somewhere in the building. Tomko makes threats of destroying the belt in the boiler room, and once more the chase is on. The group of motley wrestlers, and Bischoff, get to the boiler room moments later, only to find the cameraman out cold and the IC Championship in pieces. Bischoff tells the world watching that if they see Tomko on the street to tell him that he is wrestling not one, not two, not three, but FOUR men at the PPV...and if he does not show, he is gone. The PPV rolls around and the four men are shown... Chris Jericho, Christian, Edge, and Rhyno. With the four men in the ring, Tomko's music hits... but there is no Tomko. Bischoff's music follows and he comes out to publicly fire the man, but as he talks Tyson does in fact appear, hitting the ring decked out in a long trenchcoat and mask. Tomko begins to attack and Bischoff screams for the four men to destroy him, but Tomko alludes being put down...dodging out of way of attacks and putting all four men on the outside. Finally, with Bisch watching at the top of the ramp, Tomko removes the mask and trenchcoat to reveal... THE IC TITLE! It was a trick! Bischoff screams for a second wave of attacks, and this time they finally put him down. As the four men celebrate, Christian, Edge, and Rhyno turn on Jericho...leaving him down and out along with Tomko. CER reform the alliance they had years before. The next night, Bischoff comes to make the announcement of who will be the next IC Champion, and since Jericho never technically lost it, he will have to defend against Christian, Edge, and Rhyno tonight in an elimination match. C, E, and R agree that once Jericho is out of the picture it will be a fair fight between the three for who is the best man. The match occurs, and Jericho fights the men off for a bit, but finally succumbs to the numbers. Just as he is about to be pinned, Tomko appears weilding a chair and cleans house, saving Jericho's ass. The crowd goes apeshit, and Tomko is bah gawd over. Or maybe I'm just crazy.

Random Fan: Damn, Mr. Batista, what happened to your leg!! Batista: What do you mean? Fan: It's got, acne or something all over it... Bob: HEY! Fan: OMG WTF! Your leg talked! Batista: I know.

Yokozuna and Ludvig Borga (they were part of the Foriegn Legion at a SurSer, if that counts)

I'm sure Bob grabbed his digits so he could have another late night meeting with Mr. Dave, possibly to hear his thoughts on Saturday Night Live, and which cast member he would spinebuster if he hosted (which would of course be Uber-Pimp) Can't you just hear Big Dave throwing out the "Live From New York, it's Saturday Night!" as he Demon Bombed Tina Fey? Pure Gold.

Then what the hell are "Billy and Chuck" doing on there?!

"I'M DRUNK, I'M HIGH, GIMME SOME PUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSY!" (in the loudest possible voice you can imagine) My best friend, the night before beginning military training. He ended up trying to walk on his hands, promptly fell on his face, and fucked up his neck so bad he had to wait a few weeks until he was cleared to actually begin the training.

The CD says the song was produced by Jimmy Hart, Johnston, and JJ Maguire. Could very well be that last guy. (yeah, it's kinda sad... owning Volumes 1-4, Agression, and Forceable Entry, as well as Anthology...which I love for having "Tell Me A Lie" on it)