Rob E Dangerously

[We fade to Leon Sharpe, laying back in a lounge chair, wearing one of his t-shirts. Sharpe puts his feet up on a footrest and begins to talk.] Leon Sharpe: Hello Fans.. I bought this very footrest with the money that I got from selling my t-shirts to you. Sure, this might have cost about 40 bucks, but it was 40 bucks that you all might have given me. [sharpe nods.] Leon Sharpe: Now, you all may be losing faith in me. I heard that my sales plunged after that karate wuss Blan Coo spit his lunch all over my face and pinned me. Do not give up now. Know that I will be on the top when Blank is forgotten. [sharpe smiles.] Leon Sharpe: Blank might have thought he one upped me from the start.. since he decided to accidently take me off my game. You see, he entered first. But, he should have known that I enter first. That is a good luck charm of mine. Entering first allows me to lay back in the ring and then prepare with a good view of my opponent. Blan Coo tried to take that from me. I was coming close to giving him his and I would have if he didn't enter first, but then he unleashed the Red Mist, I didn’t automatically expect it since my sources said it was rare and evil. I don’t expect rare evil moves in debut of my opponent. Let me tell you this Blan Coo, I don’t know if that red stuff was kool aid, steak sauce, evil Japanese red death water or what. Anyways, that mist stains ya, it took me a about 2 minutes to wash that out of my face. I don’t want to go around looking like I got dunked in a punchbowl facefirst, Do I? that doesn't sell my t-shirts. But let me tell you this. The next time I sense you will use that rare evil Mist on me, I assure you that I have the counter to the Evil Mist. When we meet again I will show you what happens when I enter first What happens? Well, it's bowling shoe ugly. Blan Coo, let me tell you this, I'm not gonna give you my t-shirt. I don't give t-shirts to karate wusses who give me the red mist [sharpe grumbles.] Sharpe: Anyways, I know I am facing Manson this Sunday Night. Yes, Manson. Not that Manson, an even angrier Manson. My sources told me that Manson is sad, and angry, and bitter. Well Manson, Manny, whatever, you see.. I know why you are bitter. You are missing something. Something very important. I’ll get to that later. Manson, you were a former number one contender for the World title, weren’t you? You probably drank that shot away in dispair since you’re not facing Mak, you’re facing me. Manson, I just figure that I will be beating you on Sunday night in San Jose, when that happens, I don’t think you’ll be getting that World title shot. Then again, who knows what will happen in SJL. My biggest concern after beating you will be t-shirt sales. I know that Californians like t-shirts. Manson, happyman, we collide on Sunday, you can buy my shirt, but you can’t get a victory over me with a million dollars. Get the point?!?! [sharpe winks as we fade to black]

1) Kane comes out to attack HHH and he reveals that he is gonna be just like HBK, even down to the gimmick. 2) Kane runs down to face the UnAmericans and then uses lightning bolts to set the flag on fire 3) Kane runs down to the ring and trips over the ropes coming in 4) Kane runs down to the ring, and then accidently torches the American flag with his pyro 5) Kane comes down to the ring and then asks where he can find Hall, Nash and X-Pac so he can kick their asses. 6) Kane interferes in the Fink/Lillian match in favor of Fink, only to be stripped by three women 7) Kane shows up, injures himself, and is out another four months. Any more ways it could have been worse?

Hell.. let's take these guys in.. they could get least stay in the JL for awhile to freshen it up

hopefully this will last longer than the Conan reruns on CNBC

pushing him off a cliff?

"I'll scream if I want it" Ack!

19th and 40th! (19 for me and 40 for Lesnar Lunatic)

This vibrating broom sounds like something you'd get as a sex toy for your girlfriend if you didn't have the guts to get something like a Dildo Then she'd dump your stupid ass

starting with my random fed [Finals]: Match for the vacant WCW International World title Shane Helms pinned Jyushin Lyger with the Overcast in 0:13:19. Rating: **** (Shane Helms won the WCW International World title.) Satan pinned Shane Helms with the SatanDriver 98 in 0:01:06. Rating: * (Satan won the WCW International World title.) [Heaven or Hell]: Casket No-Time-Limit-No-Countout-No-DQ-Match God defeated Satan in 0:23:31. Rating: -* 1/4 (God won the WCW International World title.) No-Time-Limit-No-Countout-No-DQ-Match Triple H pinned God with the Pedigree in 0:00:25. Rating: 1/2* (Triple H won the WCW International World title.) No-Time-Limit-No-Countout-No-DQ-Match for the vacant Big Gold Belt Shane Helms pinned Triple H with the Overcast in 0:13:33. Rating: ** (Shane Helms won the WCW International World title.) (Shane Helms won the Big Gold Belt.) ------ Match for the vacant The Big Gold Belt Brock Lesnar pinned Shannon Moore with the F-5 in 0:11:13. Rating: *** (Brock Lesnar won the Big Gold Belt.) No-Time-Limit-No-Countout-No-DQ-Ladder Match Shane Helms defeated Brock Lesnar in 0:35:01. Rating: ** 3/4 (Shane Helms won the Big Gold Belt.) No-Time-Limit-No-Countout-No-DQ-Match for the vacant Big Gold Belt Shane Helms pinned Triple H with the Overcast in 0:13:33. Rating: ** (Shane Helms won the WCW International World title.) (Shane Helms won the Big Gold Belt.) --------- [Finals 1/2-1/28]: Match for the vacant Castaway Wrestling Alliance Heavyweight Mike Quackenbush pinned The Sandman with the Quackensmash in 0:10:45. Rating: 1/2* (Mike Quackenbush won the Castaway Wrestling Alliance Heavyweight title.) No-Time-Limit-No-Countout-No-DQ-Falls-Count-Anywhere Match Hayabusa pinned Mike Quackenbush after the Michinoku Driver in 0:05:14. Rating: *** 1/4 (Hayabusa won the Castaway Wrestling Alliance Heavyweight title.) No-Time-Limit-Match with Managers Banned From Ringside where the title can change hands via DQ or Countout: Mike Quackenbush pinned Hayabusa with the Quackensmash in 0:13:07. Rating: *** 1/2 (Mike Quackenbush won the Castaway Wrestling Alliance Heavyweight title.) ------ [Finals, 1/2-1/28]: Match for the vacant CWA Tag Team titles Steve Corino and Jeff Jarrett defeated Hayabusa and Yang when Jarrett pinned Yang with the Stroke in 0:11:20. Rating: *** (Steve Corino and Jeff Jarrett won the CWA Tag Team titles.) [3/14-3/25] Jason Jett and Magnum TOKYO defeated The Can-Am Wrecking Crew when M. TOKYO pinned Jarrett with the Adult Video Star Press in 0:14:27. Rating: * (Jason Jett and Magnum TOKYO won the CWA Tag Team titles.) No-Time-Limit-No-Countout-No-DQ-Falls-Count-Anywhere Match The Can-Am Wrecking Crew defeated Jason Jett and Magnum TOKYO when Corino pinned Jett after the Doctor Bomb in 0:26:08. Rating: *** 3/4 (The Can-Am Wrecking Crew won the CWA Tag Team titles.) CIMA and SUWA defeated The Can-Am Wrecking Crew when SUWA pinned Corino with the Triple F in 0:08:40. Rating: * 3/4 (CIMA and SUWA won the CWA Tag Team titles.) AFS (Asian Cougar and Daisuke Ikeda) defeated CIMA and SUWA when Cougar pinned SUWA with the Aztecan Suplex in 0:08:07. Rating: ** 1/2 (AFS (Asian Cougar and Daisuke Ikeda) won the CWA Tag Team titles.) Four Corners Match Kronik defeated Air Paris and Carl Malenko, CIMA and SUWA and AFS (Asian Cougar/Daisuke Ikeda) when Clark pinned Ikeda with the Meltdown in 0:25:29. Rating: *** (Kronik won the CWA Tag Team titles.) ---------- [Finals, 2/28-3/12]: Match for the vacant CWA United States title Michael Modest pinned Robert Thompson with the Natural Driver in 0:08:26. Rating: *** 1/4 (Michael Modest won the CWA United States title.) Two-out-of-three-Falls Match with Managers Banned From Ringside Christopher Daniels beat Michael Modest 2 falls to 1: x M. Modest beat Daniels via a short lariat in 0:12:22 x Daniels beat M. Modest via the Last Rites in 0:18:18 x Daniels beat M. Modest via an Asai moonsault in 0:20:45 Rating: *** 3/4 (Christopher Daniels won the CWA United States title.) ----- No-Time-Limit-No-Countout-No-DQ-Match with Managers Banned From Ringside for the Naturally Thrillin' and Shannon Moore defeated The B-2s and Too Cold Scorpio when Moore pinned Scorpio with the Twisting Moonsault in 0:05:25. Rating: *** 1/4 (Naturally Thrillin' and Shannon Moore won the CWA Six-Man Tag Team titles.) The B-2s and Robert Thompson defeated Naturally Thrillin' and C.W. Anderson when D. Morgan pinned Maverick after a fisherman's suplex in 0:21:56. Rating: ** 1/2 (The B-2s and Robert Thompson won the CWA Six-Man Tag Team titles.) Two-out-of-three-Falls Match The Caromanic Express and Mike Maverick beat The B-2s and Robert Thompson 2 falls to 1: x Schwanz beat Daniels via countout in 0:20:27 x R. Thompson beat Maverick via the Double Arm DDT in 0:22:23 x Schwanz beat D. Morgan via the Swinging Schwanz in 0:25:53 Rating: * 1/4 (The Caromanic Express and Mike Maverick won the CWA Six-Man Tag Team titles.) --------- No-Time-Limit-No-Countout-No-DQ-Match Bill Goldberg pinned Steve Corino with the Jackhammer in 0:08:57. Rating: ** 1/2 (Bill Goldberg won the NWA Heavyweight title.) Jeff Jarrett pinned Bill Goldberg with his special move in 0:15:10. Rating: ** (Jeff Jarrett won the NWA Heavyweight title.) Shinya Hashimoto pinned Jeff Jarrett with the Vertical Drop DDT in 0:07:43. Rating: ** (Shinya Hashimoto won the NWA Heavyweight title.) Triangle Match Ken Shamrock defeated The Wall and Shinya Hashimoto when Shamrock made The Wall submit to the Ankle Lock Submission in 0:19:56. Rating: * 1/2 (Ken Shamrock won the NWA Heavyweight title.) Frank Shamrock pinned Ken Shamrock after a belly-to-belly suplex in 0:00:15. Rating: * (Frank Shamrock won the NWA Heavyweight title.) Joe L. Maximo pinned Frank Shamrock with the Crown's Gate in 0:04:24. Rating: *** 1/4 (Joe L. Maximo won the NWA Heavyweight title.) ------ go for it..

Do any of your top 40 stations or other radio stations play Pink's "Just like a pill" constantly? I swear, in Kansas City on 93.3, they play that song soooooo fuckin' much. Because one of the DJs there considers it his favorite off that album. It gets old.. but do you have this sort of thing happening in your towns?

here we go.. 3489 words.. roll.. ----- Axis: We are looking forward to an action packed evening, so let’s get to our first match as Blank takes on Leon Sharpe. Suicide King: Let’s see if either of these guys can win their debut there. Edwin MacPhisto: From what I’ve heard about both guys, this could be a styles clash. Sharpe is a big guy and Blank is a small martial artist. Suicide King: So, it’d be like watching a car wreck, in a way? Edwin MacPhisto: Yeah.. that’d be a good way to describe it. Axis: Let’s go on to the match here. [The Lights dim a bit and suddenly "Something Bad is Gonna Happen" by Fenix-TX starts to play thought the arena] Funyon: Introducing first, he’s making his SJL debut, he hails from Detroit, Michigan, weighing in at 300 pounds, Leon Sharpe! [Leon Sharpe walks down to the apron in his gear with a t-shirt on as he gets cheers, many of which are now for him being from Detroit, which is near the site of this card. Sharpe steps over the top rope and into the ring to wait for his opponent] Funyon: Introducing second… ["Stick em up" by Quarashi starts to play] Funyon: he’s also making his SJL debut, weighing in at 190 pounds, Blank! [blank rolls on out to the ring on his skateboard, doing tricks on his way down. Sharpe just glares at this with a look of disgust.] Axis: Sharpe doesn’t look to be a fan of Blank’s skatboarding. Suicide King: That’s because big guys like him can’t do all that.. it’s jealousy Edwin MacPhisto: Well, it won’t matter how well Blank skates here, it will matter how good he can wrestle. Suicide King: Unless he hits people with his skateboard, then I’d say that it’d matter. [blank, while skating, leaps off the board and onto the apron, where he is then knocked back to the floor by Leon Sharpe within seconds.] Edwin MacPhisto: What an unfortunate accident there. I think it was an accident. Axis: It sorta looks like Sharpe bumped into Blank as he landed, knocking him to the floor. Suicide King: That was no accident! That was a cheapshot by this newcomer Sharpe. Who the hell does he think he is? That he can disrupt an intro like that? Damnit, he could have fallen on his skateboard and broken a rib. [blank re-enters the ring as Sharpe stands in the other corner, staring at him and smirking.] This match started out with Sharpe walking around the ring as Blank decided to be faster than the 300lb Sharpe. Blank fired off with quick kicks at Sharpe’s legs first. He moved fast to avoid Sharpe trying to come back with counters. Blank, after some more kicks, moved in to attempt a jawbreaker. Axis: Blank trying for a jawbreaker here! Sharpe just throws him across the ring. I’d guess going into grappling with Sharpe may not be a good idea yet. Edwin MacPhisto: Sharpe’s strength was too much for Blank there. Blank got back to his feet, deciding that it’d be smarter to just try sticking and moving on Sharpe. Blank went for an Irish whip, that got countered by Sharpe, Sharpe then hit Blank with a forearm. That dazed Blank a little bit, but he stayed on his feet. Sharpe whipped him towards the ropes, but he then countered with a dropkick, surprising Sharpe, sending the big man Sharpe wobbling towards the ropes a little bit. Sharpe walked a little bit to regain his composure. Blank then moved in a bit, kicking towards Sharpe’s legs some more, Sharpe tried to brush off the kicks, finally grabbing his foot and then kicking him in the knee to counter his kicking. Sharpe then took his opportunity on the dazed Blank to hit a back elbow strike, then Sharpe goes for a sidewalk slam, only to have Blank try and counter with a DDT, forcing Sharpe to grab hold of his ribs and squeeze with a bearhug on the smaller man. Sharpe rammed Blank into the turnbuckles back first a few times before releasing his bearhug. Sharpe then throws some strikes to the ribs of Blank, trying to wear down the smaller man. Blank replied with some kicks and an irish whip. Blank then hits Sharpe with an armdrag takedown, stunning him a bit. Axis: Sharpe is surprised here, as he is down from an armdrag, but he is getting back up. Suicide King: Sharpe is too slow for Blank, Blank will just kick Sharpe’s legs out from under him and go from there. Timber! Edwin MacPhisto: Don’t be so sure.. Leon Sharpe didn’t come here in front of his hometown to lose his first match. Sharpe was indeed back up, as Blank went in with some more kicks, Sharpe caught his leg on one kick, spun him around and hit him with a clothesline, taking him down. Sharpe picks up Blank in a unique way, by pulling on Blank’s ponytail and yanking him to his feet. Suicide King: Hey, that’s a cheap shot! I know all the cheap shots and yanking your opponent up by his ponytail is one of them! Edwin MacPhisto: I don’t really agree with Sharpe’s tactics, but, I guess if they get the job done for him. Sharpe smacks Blank around a bit, earning a kick to the face for his efforts. Sharpe takes that kick hard, moving back towards the ropes, and then Blank comes in with a dropkick, sending Sharpe over the top and Sharpe lands feet first on the floor. Blank then dives in with a suicide dive, but Sharpe moves out of the way, making sure that Blank hit the floor first. Sharpe swoops in, kicking him while on the floor, yanking him up by his ponytail again and giving him a backdrop on the floor. Sharpe notices the count being given and he throws Blank into the ring. He then gets on the apron himself. Axis: Sharpe on the apron, Blank getting to his feet as Sharpe steps over the top, Blank just makes Sharpe hit that top rope crotch first.. Edwin MacPhisto: Ouch! That was uncalled for! Suicide King: Yeah, I’m sure that if Sharpe had a ponytail, he’d yank on that too. Sharpe is obviously in pain and displeased with this turn of events. As he looks on in pain trying to get himself into the ring and out of the ropes, Blank recieves a warning from the referee. Blank then comes in, hitting Sharpe with some more kicks to the legs, focusing on the knees. This puts Sharpe down to one knee as Blank walks back to try for another kick. He swings and Sharpe moves out of the way and throws Blank thru the ropes. Blank gets back onto the apron, only to receive a Hot Shot from Sharpe, which leaves him on the apron in pain. Sharpe kicks at his ribs through the ropes as Blank tries to get up. Axis: Sharpe kicking at the ribs as Blank is trying to get to his feet on the apron. Edwin MacPhisto: I don’t agree with this either, obviously Sharpe has a bit of a meanstreak in him, that’s for sure. Suicide King: Sharpe is trying to pick on a smaller man and he’s doing it to the cheers of the fans. I don’t his tactics, he should cheat and want to be booed, like normal people, not cheat and be cheered. King was indignant about Sharpe’s tactics. But Blank rolled onto the floor, to catch a breather, Sharpe moves back a little bit and then Blank jumps onto the apron. He slings himself onto the top rope, coming off with a springboard dropkick that hits Sharpe and causes him to stumble back a little bit. Blank charges in, trying to go for a DDT on Sharpe, only to have Sharpe counter with a bearhug to his ribs. Blank counters by slapping Sharpe in the ears Axis: Painful move there as Blank hits that mongolian chop to counter the bearhug Sharpe applied. Sharpe still has the hold on and he headbutts Blank, Sharpe is trying to take him out any way he can. Suicide King: I’m sure headbutting a guy while you have a bearhug on him is fine and dandy to these fans. Edwin MacPhisto: It’s fine in the eyes of Leon Sharpe, and that appears to be the only authority that matters on that issue. The ref went for the ‘drop his arm’ method of determining if Blank had a enough. After his arm dropped once, Blank managed to grab onto a rope while his arm was up the second time. Sharpe, having his hold forcibly broken, charged in with a clothesline to Blank, only to see Blank duck the clothesline and hit him with an enziguri, a kick to the back of the head, this startled Sharpe, as he walked towards a corner. Blank whipped him towards the other corner, going a cartwheel on his way in, before doing a backflip, and getting introduced to Sharpe’s right arm, as Leon Sharpe charged out of the corner and gave Blank a thunderous lariat after Blank hit his backflip. Sharpe went for a cover there. Axis: One.. Tw.. foot on the ropes there.. Edwin MacPhisto: Blank was too close to the ropes there for a cover. Still, doing that backflip cost him there as Sharpe was able to come out of the corner and hit him with that lariat. Suicide King: Sharpe will have to yank on Blank’s ponytail a few more times before he can finish him off. Sharpe did, in fact, pick Blank up by his ponytail, he went for an irish whip, and Blank countered. Blank hit Sharpe with a spinning heel kick as Sharpe came back off the ropes. This startled Sharpe, leaving Blank to come off the ropes and hit Sharpe with a roundhouse kick, putting Sharpe on his back and leaving Blank to attempt a cover Axis: One.. tw.. kickout by Sharpe there Suicide King: Blank’s speed is catching up with Sharpe here. Sharpe can’t cheat forever. Edwin MacPhisto: I heard Sharpe has a lot more stuff left to dish out when it comes to moves, so Blank better make sure he doesn’t fall into a trap here Blank tried to yank Sharpe up by his hair, as Sharpe got up, looked at Blank with an evil eye and gestured for Blank to come at him. Blank thought it out a bit and took into consideration that charging at a three-hundred pound man like Sharpe would be really stupid when he has hit stuff on him already. Sharpe decided to go after Blank, causing Blank to hit some combos, like a punch, a jab and a kick to the shin. Sharpe was displeased with the kick to the shin, so he whipped Blank towards the ropes and as it looked apparent that Sharpe would hit a big boot on Blank, Blank countered by hitting a baseball slide into Sharpe’s other leg. That took him down a few notches. Sharpe got back up to his feet, irritated at the counter to his move, so he decided to go for Blank’s ribs some more. Sharpe blocked a kick and went to work. Sharpe hit a ribbreaker on Blank, allowing him to fall to the canvas, before he picked him up and gave him a spinebuster. Sharpe yanked Blank up again and hammered at his ribs. Axis: Sharpe going off on those ribs, Gut-wrench suplex by Sharpe, that had to put some more pain on Blank’s ribs. Suicide King: Sharpe would be foolish to not use his size here. Obviously if he just tried hard enough, he could slow Blank down, but the big oaf isn’t doing that. Edwin MacPhisto: Sharpe picks Blank up again here.. Axis: Sideslam by Sharpe, putting Blank back on his back here. Suicide King: Very clever.. but Blank kicks with his feet, not with his ribs. Sharpe should remember that if he wants to hold off his kicking, or the fabled Red Mist that I’ve heard a lot about. Sharpe stomps on Blank’s ribs some more, taunting him to get up. Sharpe picks up Blank and hits another ribbreaker. Blank grimaced in pain as Sharpe stood with a smirk on his face Suicide King: What is Sharpe’s deal? He just seems to arrogant here.. sure, he’s putting Blank in pain, but he’s missing some openings. Edwin MacPhisto: Sharpe seems very confident of himself against Blank. Axis: Blank getting back up to his feet. Sharpe seems to be looking for a good shot here. Wait.. what in the hell is this? Sharpe does a martial arts pose as a mockery of Blank Suicide King: What the hell is Sharpe gonna do to Blank when it comes to martial arts, Sharpe Fu? Blank replies to that blasphemy by kicking Sharpe hard a few times in the legs, causing him to back up Axis: Sharpe paying for his little insult to Blank. Suicide King: Now, that’s Martial Arts! Blank charged in a bit to kick more, but Sharpe hit him first with some kicks to the ribs, but Blank was about to counter it Axis: Blank with a dragon screw to Sharpe, taking him down again. Edwin MacPhisto: Sharpe didn’t watch it when it came to kicking this man. Blank countered it here. Sharpe gets up to his feet, only to notice a charging Blank. Sharpe then hit a back body drop on Blank. Sharpe tried to exert his power by pounding Blank in a corner. Following with Sharpe standing on the middle ropes while trying to get punches in on Blank in the corner. One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six! Seven! Axis: Sharpe is laying it to Blank in the corner. Eight! Nine! *Sharpe lifts a fist to the air* Suicide King: That’s just wasting time! Ten! *Sharpe unleashes what could be called a ponytail-grab takedown, as he grabbed that ponytail, using it to toss Blank to the ground, ala an Armdrag takedown. Sharpe receives a warning from the referee for this* Suicide King: A warning? Come on! He’s done it about 10 times tonight! Edwin MacPhisto: This is obviously more serious than before. Sharpe was only using that ponytail to yank Blank up, not throw him around, until then. *Sharpe hits an elbowdrop and mockingly smacks Blank across the face again* Suicide King: Come on! Can any of you agree with Sharpe’s tactics? Edwin MacPhisto: I didn’t see nothing.. hehe.. I think you’re just mad because a guy is cheating and you can’t cheer for it. *Sharpe goes for a kneedrop, but Blank gets up causing Sharpe to miss that move. Blank hits Sharpe with a poke of the eyes, followed by an eyegouge. He used that time to hit Sharpe with kicks to the chest from the side as he is trying to recover from the missed kneedrop and the eye gouging. Blank whips Sharpe towards the ropes, holds on to him, stopping him a bit, and then hits Sharpe with a spinning heel kick. That dazed Sharpe quite a bit and Blank sought to follow through. Blank went for a legsweep, taking Sharpe down to the mat. Blank hits Sharpe with a standing moonsault, he goes to follow it up..* Axis: Blank trying to follow this up, and possibly score an upset here in his debut. Blank hits a senton onto Sharpe. And a cover by Blank.. One! Two! Axis: Kickout by Sharpe! Edwin MacPhisto: Sharpe showing that he can kick out of big moves here in his debut. Suicide King: Let’s see if he does anything more in this match. *Sharpe gets up onto his feet, only to be whipped into the corner by Blank. Who comes in and does a handstand onto the turnbuckle.* Axis: Nice handstand there by Blank Edwin MacPhisto: But Sharpe is walking out of the corner and he’s gonna see if Blank does anything. Axis: Blank coming back down off the top onto his fee--- CRAP! SHARPE WITH A GERMAN SUPLEX! Blank just got lawndarted into the mat there. Sharpe waited for him to comedown and then launched him with a German Suplex when he landed. Impressive move by Sharpe there. Suicide King: Impressive? You mean Sharpe trying to throw Blank like a ragdoll? That didn’t impress me, that was just a cheapshot by Sharpe. *Sharpe pounced on Blank after taking him down hard with that German Suplex. Sharpe went for a Camel Clutch, which wenches the ribs of Blank. Blank was too close to the ropes as Sharpe was forced to release the hold. Sharpe then went back to work, hitting Blank with an Exploder Suplex and then going for a cover.* One! Two! Axis: Kickout by Blank! Suicide King: Blank had too much in his tank to lose right now. Edwin MacPhisto: That’s right. *Sharpe was stunned as Blank decided to regain control. Blank hit Sharpe with some more kicks to the legs, following that up with a DDT and a cover.* One! Two! Axis: Sharpe kicks out! WHOA! He threw Blank off him.. *Blank went back to kicking Sharpe in the legs. Sharpe caught one of the kicks, spinning Blank in a circle, as he gripped on with a Chokeslam* Axis: Sharpe is gonna go for a chokeslam here! Suicide King: Blank is too quick, I just sense this.. *Blank grabs Sharpe’s arm and escapes the chokeslam by countering with an Armdrag* Axis: Blank counters out of this, Armdrag! Suicide King: Told you so! Edwin MacPhisto: Blank wasn’t battered enough to just take a Chokeslam from Sharpe quite yet. *Sharpe, was obviously frustrated over that counter, gets back up and clocks Blank with a clothesline. Blank is startled, but he irish whips Sharpe into the ropes. He attempts a Huracanrana, but Sharpe catches him.* Axis: Sharpe has Blank up now.. looks like a powerbomb.. *Sharpe drops Blank onto his back with a painful looking powerbomb, Blank flips over onto his stomach due to the impact* Axis: What a Powerbomb by Sharpe. Blank may be done after that!! Edwin MacPhisto: That’s what happens when you try to hit a rana on Leon Sharpe. You get hurt. Suicide King: I don’t usually see powerbombs like that. That was plainly vicious. *Blank tries to crawl out of the ring as Sharpe goes to drag him into the center of the ring for a cover.* Axis: Blank may still be in this, he doesn’t want to just be dragged to the middle of the ring. Suicide King: Hey Leon, powerbomb him again, you oaf! Goodness.. that’s what he should do. Edwin MacPhisto: Sharpe did take a bit long to go for a cover, but Blank’s legs were too close to the ropes after he took that powerbomb. *Sharpe decides to pick Blank up instead* Suicide King: Look, he didn’t even pull the hair again! Axis: Wait! Blank counters.. SMALL PACKAGE! One! Two! Axis: Kickout by Sharpe!! Blank caught Sharpe off-guard again! Suicide King: Haha.. I love when big goofs get shown up like this.. Sharpe should have yanked him up and powerbombed him into the mat again, but he took too long. Hahaha! Edwin MacPhisto: I knew from the day this match was made that it’d be a styles clash, the small martial artist Blank and the big man Sharpe seemed like an interesting debut match for both men. Axis: Sharpe is getting back up here, but Blank is going to the apron. *Blank gets on the apron and then gets onto the top rope and comes off* Axis: He’s going for a Springboard Spinning Back Kick *Sharpe manages to avoid the kick, but Blank lands on his feet* Axis: Wait, Sharpe got out of the way of the move. Edwin MacPhisto: very clever of Sharpe. *Sharpe walks back and then hits Blank with a Big Boot, taking Blank down.* Axis: Big Boot by Sharpe, Blank is down now.. Suicide King: a big boot isn’t gonna finish Blank. Only big goofs like Sharpe think that. Edwin MacPhisto: King, you’re being a bit hard on Sharpe. Heck, I figure that Big Boot isn’t meant to be a finisher. *Blank gets up onto his feet* Axis: Blank charges at Sharpe, no.. Sharpe has him up in a Gorilla Press.. could this be his finisher? *Sharpe presses and front slams Blank, hitting him with the setup to the Silver Bullet* Axis: Sharpe picks up Blank again, into another Gorilla Press.. SILVER BULLET! Cover by Sharpe! ONE! TWO! THREE! Axis: Sharpe has prevailed in his debut match here tonight, with his finisher, "The Silver Bullet". Edwin MacPhisto: Blank but up a great effort, I’m sure we’ll be hearing a lot from both of these athletes in the future. Suicide King: If Blank didn’t have a ponytail, Sharpe would have been in a bit of trouble. Edwin MacPhisto: King, that’s just your opinion.. Axis: Still, a good opener here.. -------------- Anyways.. LS

That Guy holds back all the good talent, like How, When, Where and Him! This Guy is a crusader for all that is right in the world!

ok.. circa September 2001 -- Tape #1: WWF Biggest, Smallest, Strangest, Strongest -Hosted by Jesse Ventura, from 1985 -We start off with clips of guys, such as Andre, Patera, midgets, Atlas (holy shit! get off the Roids Tony!) and other guys -Andre the Giant v. Samoan #3. You try naming a Samoan. Lockup, #3 into a corner, #3 trys some kind of offense and it looks like Andre had a ARMBAR on. #3 behind Andre, BAD IDEA. #3 flys and that is all for this. -Clips of Bobo Brazil, do the Coco BUTT! Brazil is doing his 'cool in the 60s' offense to Blassie. -Clips of Haystacks Calhoun. Guess how he died kiddies! It appears that somebody is selling for the big guy in overalls in a six-man -Clips of Ernie Ladd. Ladd, of course, is very fucking tall. Or the jobbers are short. Ladd is taking on Jobboan #3 and Frank Williams. -Clips of Ivan Koloff. -Clips of Gorilla Monsoon, put a shirt on Gino! as he finishes Caveman jobber #3 with a splash. -Clips of Blackjack Mulligan, who is the father of Barry Windham, Mulligan is on Piper's Pit. -Clips of Big John Studd v. Hulk Hogan. KILL ME! KILL ME! STUDD SUCKS! I'm sorry, don't canonize him. Hogan is in at *364*lbs here. Hogan does a shoulderblock and Studd no-sells. Slams exchanged without success. Studd's gimmick sucked. -Clips of Nikolai Volkoff. Sing the anthem! no.. he is gonna beat some jobber in a tag match. -Clips of King Kong Bundy. Bundy is with Jimmy Hart here, when did that partnership end? Bundy stands, and his opponent sells around him. His opponent is Tony Garea. -Clips of Hillbilly Jim, as Ventura makes a death threat to us.. err.. no.. he just says that a cassette will come out about Jim and Elmer. Jesus christ.. that does not sound good. Jim makes Rene Goulet sell for him and finishes him with the BEARHUG OF DOOM! Hillbilly Jim is shown on Piper's pit. Man, I just know Orton looks like a western star or a Blazing Saddles guy, help me. Hillbilly Jim introduces Uncle Elmer. Stan Frazier must have been 45 by then. -Clips of midgets. Man, did they have lame gimmicks or what? if these midgets weren't bald, people would confuse them for children. -More clips of Midgets. I'd take Mexican midgets, thank you very much. Haiti Kid (from Haiti) and Tiger Jackson (from Florida) take on some guy and Dana Carpenter, Carpenter looks like he is just 15 years old and not a midget. Jackson hits a f-ed up flying headscissors and a f-ed up splash. Then again, where can you train a midget? -More clips of Midgets. One is a fat Indian midget with a mohawk, two of them have heads of hair. Man, this crowd is quiet. Must be everybody getting drinks. One midget bites the other midget on the ass, hilarity ensues. Little Beaver unleashes the Little Press Slam for a win. -More fucking midgets. Don't put all of these on at once. Wait.. this better not have gone 45 minutes. But the ref is a drunk and makes sure this match DOESN'T END. Count the pin. Vince McMahon is easily amused by little men chasing each other. Little Brutus and Sky Lo Lo get the win at 42:22 -Clips of the Rugged Russians. Rugged Russians my ass! more like Crazy Cardinals! -Clips of the Canadian Wolfman, who I think jobbed to Monsoon and he is facing Gorilla now. Canadian Wolfman, who comes from the caves of Canada. -Clips of Pampero Firpo. He sure has alot of hair. Firpo supposedly spoke six languages. -Clips of Luke Graham. Who also has alot of hair and is fat. GRAND WIZARD OF WRESTLING! -Vince McMahon interviews THE GRAND WIZARD! and Crazy Luke Graham, Wizard is the man. There is a good reason why Luke had a mouthpiece. Wizard is undoubtedly the man. The Grand Wizard is the manager of champions, ya know. Vince accuses Wizard of planting the sign. Pot, meet Kettle. -Clips of Mad Dog Vachon, who is a "cult hero" in Minnesota. I wonder why???? Must be his Always Watchable Amusing-times. Vachon is taking on Buddy Colt here. If Albert was born 15 years earlier, he would be a Vachon. -Clips of Lord Alfred Hayes having tea with the British Bulldogs, Mr. Fuji and Moondog Spot. Feel the hilarity! Feel the amusement as Moondog Spot smashes stuff. Nice suit Vince. -Clips of Mil Mascaras. Mascaras wrestles "only occiasonally" in 1985. -Clips of Captain Lou Albano. Good deal that Vince Jr. hated him. -Clips of Nikolai Volkoff. Nikolai SINGS THE ANTHEM! -Clips of WWF guys with odd clothes. Adonis (dog collar), Sheik (pointy boots), Brutus Beefcake (original face), Junk Yard Dog (chain), Strongbows and Hogan. Why Hogan? because it's either this or Hogan in the midget part. Piper, Jimmy Hart, Blassie, Lauper, Valentine, Heenan, Johnny Valiant (did Vince hate him also?), Moolah, The Moondogs and Ventura (duh). -Clips of Patera, Heenan, Big John Studd (boo!) and Vince with some poor sap. Heenan is doing the hair for this guy. The poor guy gets his clothes wet and shaved. -Clips of Mad Maxine, 6'4" my ass! although Maxine didn't last. -Clips of the one time this man showed up in the WWF, THE MISSING LINK! What an interesting gimmick, and alot of facepaint. You are the missing link, kissyourcareer goodbye! -Some clips of George Steele, George Steele uses the padding, as he beats on the Brooklyn Brawler. George Steele still wants to wrestle to show that the new kids "can't work". Fuck off George. -Clips of Bepo the Mongol is shown. Bepo went on to sing the Anthem in the 80s. -Clips of Putski-Ventura. This is an arm-wrestling match and it ends like EVERY SINGLE ARM WRESTLING MATCH IN HISTORY HAS ENDED. It ends with the heel KOing the face. But, after massive stalling. Ventura chairs Putski after some more stalling and suspense. And the Polish wanted revenge on Jesse Ventura. -The Iron Sheik has the Persian Clubs. Sheik is also speaking another language, uh, I think he is. -Big John Dudd (tm John McAdam) is with Vince. He roided up to 380lbs for today. DUDD is going for lifting 630lbs, then for lifting over 690lbs. His gimmick sucked. DUDD is now going for 700lbs, how much did Bravo lift? (he was only Canada's strongest man). DUDD is unable to lift 700lbs. -We go to Bruno on TNT (oh him and Vince, those crazy kids!), DUDD comes out and tries it again. DUDD lifts "700" pounds. As John McAdam said 'Who was the worst- Studd, Ivan Putski, or George Steele? To me, they all sucked equally in the ring, but at least Steele has a gimmick and Putski had charisma- leaving Studd the Thud as the worst.' -Clips of Tony Atlas (nice body Tony, get off the roids now). Patera is also around as he does some bumps. Patera and Heenan must have gone to the same barber. -Now in the ring with Vince, Ken Patera. Patera is gonna drive a spike thru some wood. Patera isn't that charismatic. Patera does drive the spike thru the walnut, as he wants Vince to give that to the fans, uh.. bad idea. Patera talks about his 'hand strength'. Put your own dirty joke in here. -Ken Patera bends a spike in half. -Ken Patera will now throw a rock thru the window at McDonalds. -Oh, just kidding. -Patera will blow up a hot water bottle and pop it. He does it, sorta. -Now, Ken Patera wants Vince McMahon to drive a van at him so he can hold it back with his legs. Hayes warns Patera about Vince's driving. So, Patera will put a pillow between his back and the wall and he will put his feet against the bumper and hold it back. You are no Magnus Von Magnusison buddy. As Patera puts his foot on a slow moving van, and then he puts both feet on. KILL HIM VINCE! but Patera shakes a bit as smoke comes out. Vince's foot got "stuck" on the accelorator. -That's all folks! -This take is only good if you like this, if you want to see alot of Big John Studd or if you have a robot friend that can satirize this with you. -and we close with an advertisement for Best of the WWF Vol IV, advertising Hogan-Snuka/Orndorff-Orton. An add for 'WWF, The Managers' with Hart, Heenan, WIZARD!, Albano and Blassie. Another ad for "Wrestling's Country Boys", featuring the Hillbillies. Harley Davison and Elmer talk. Then, DUDD v. ELMER. CHRIST! That's inhuman to take! -In closing, I demand more of the Grand Wizard and less of Big John Studd. But a video of Patera squishing soap with his hands in prison must be scary. ------- feedback?

I was going thru a calendar while bored and I noticed that SJL might have Thursday Night Shows on Halloween and Thanksgiving and one Tuesday show got on 12/31/2002. I guess anything can happen, right?

Nice pic they got of Nowinski for that page..

He should do that without an airtank then we'll be impressed. He can do the "Blainetology" ( © South Park) gimmick. Krisstology forever!

Anybody have any copies of the column that was on PWTorch for awhile since 9/11 that was an article from 1991 about Slaughter being an Iraqi and all the weird ideas they could do after that. I want to see that again. Just so we can all mark down the stuff that the UnAmericans will not be doing (such as getting boots from Saddam).

We will be the Edge Executioners! The Double E. Feel free to join it. I'm open to ideas about the name

did we all notice Molly had a thong on during RAW? Good.. that seems out of character for her. Hehehe.. Where will Molly/Nowinski go next? I figure it will end up with Molly turning out to be too much for Nowinski to handle. Then it can be hinted to that Nowinski blew it big time with Molly. Of course Nowinski would always deny those claims. In the WWE climate, if this goes anywhere, neither Nowinski or Molly should be turned heel, but Molly won't do racy angles either because she's a big Christian. Sadly, this may not fly.

Results of the qualifiers.. Brock Lesnar over Mabel, 14-2 Ken Shamrock over Billy Gunn, 15-1 ------- Bret Hart (1993) v. Brock Lesnar (2002) Triple H (1997) v. Kurt Angle (2000) Steve Austin (1996) v. Edge (2001) Owen Hart (1994) v. Ken Shamrock (1998) ----- vote... voting ends after TNA on Wednesday

*ba-da-BUMP!!* The Hardys v. Rosie and Jamal in a Tuxedo Match Kamala v. Albert with Jamie Noble as the guest ref. Winner gets to hump Nidia in the ring. Eric Bischoff v. The Undertaker, Black Hair Dye on a pole match. Edge v. Test. 2 out of three falls. Fall 1: First person to hit a Spear or a Big Boot wins. Fall 2: Hair contest. Fall 3: Joke-telling contest. Chris Jericho v. Kurt Angle. HHH must interfere every three minutes, pedigree both men and bury them. The only way to win is to find a pair of Linda McMahons panties, strip down, put on the panties and come to the ring with them on. Rikishi v. Mae Young. Bra and Panties match. First person to give their opponent a stinkface wins. Legends match: Iron Sheik v. Superstar Graham in an 'exploding ring' match. Rob Van Dam v. Kurrgan. Iron Claw Challenge. Rey Misterio Jr (dressed in a manatee outfit) v. Rico (dressed in a panda outfit) in a match where you cannot use any other move but a low blow. Kane v. Billy Gunn. Reverse Inferno/Semen match. You have to set yourself on fire to win, if you lose, you have to drink down Pat Patterson's sperm. Bradshaw v. Norman Smiley. First person to engage in Anal Sex with the other person wins. One Man Gang v. Bam Bam Bigelow. Mud Wrestling match. Roddy Piper v. Jimmy Snuka in a 'lucha libre, crackpipe on a pole match', first person to execute a lucha libre move or get the crackpipe wins the match. and the main event: HHH v. Shawn Michaels. Banana on a pole match. First person to take the banana from the pole, unpeel it and eat it, wins the match.

Buddy Young, the most confused preacher in Wrestling! I used Young, as a Priest with a collar (with taking off the collar as a sign of his finisher), a Reverend, a religious guy who supposedly got head from a prostitute dressed as an Alter Boy (for one ICW show) His finishers: The Hail Mary, The Leap of Faith, The Buddy Cutter. Anyways, Buddy would come to the WWE and team up with D-Von as the "Apostles". But, Buddy would come out to either organ music or "God Hates Us All" (Slayer). This leads to Buddy and D-Von breaking up. Buddy then goes on to get a ho train of girls dressed as Catholic boys or something. Just to make it more creepy

doesn't get.. "Big Ben" Doesn't that seem possible? the WWF will dub him that. Maybe he'd be a porn star feuding with Val or whatever..

From WC: "I was never a really big fan of that angle, but am intrigued by what other bookers' interpretations might look like: Vince Russo - Instead of pushing the heel's face into the cake, the babyface instead sticks his own face in to "swerve us." Paul Heyman - Wrestler powerbombs his foe through the cake (and the table) while Joey Styles screams "We're ECW ... and the 'C' stands for CAKE!" Atsushi Onita - Face pushes heel into cake and the cake explodes. Kevin Nash - Builds the entire show around the arrival of the cake, then when the cake gets there, he eats it, beats up twelve Luchadores and leaves with a porn star. Kevin Sullivan - Gives the cake to Chris Benoit and tells him to pretend that he's eating it even though he's not. Eric Bischoff - Tells all the boys in the locker room and various people on the Internet and Radio that the possibility of the cake coming to WCW is highly unlikely...and the swerves the boys when the cake finally arrives! Kevin Nash - Tells Goldberg, Konnan, and Bryan Clarke to all job to the cake. Then, when cake is a big star, books Rey Mysterio to defeat the cake to earn him the "Cake Killer" nickname. Cake is finally ran over by a monster truck. Tells Randy Savage to announce that he knows he ran over the cake, but never tells the answer and we are left with the mystery for months. When cake recovers, Nash tells cake to go on Jay Leno and challenge current WWF champ for the cake's own cake ($$$) at stake. Pat Patterson: Holds Cake Party in which each piece is delivered to the ring in 2 minute intrevals Dusty Rhodes: The cake gets eaten, but then the next night it is revealed that the wrong cake was eaten and the real cake is still champion." hehehe..

well.. somebody had to spark up the trend of throwing trash in the ring and running in again.. right?