Patty O'Green

*DINGDINGDING* The teams quickly decide on who's going to start. Megan Skye for Holly's team and Sophie for Team Morgan, cheered on by all her team-mates, except Morgan who stands withdrawn from the rest staring at the ringmat. COLE An awkward position for Sophie to be in, teaming with the girl who took her Women's Title, Morgan, fighting against the team her cousin Josie Baker has backed. COACH L'problem. Sophie and Megan lock up and Sophie applies a headlock, to cheers from her team. But Megan quickly performs a legsweep and Sophie faceplants into the mat, which quietens them down. Sophie checks her face for damage as Megan stomps the back. Picking Sophie up, Megan tests the face again, with a forearm smash. Sophie falls against the ropes and Megan's team-mates are now the more vocal as she stomps the French girl down. COLE Megan Skye taking no nonsense here tonight. I suppose she takes enough of it out of the ring, having to deal with Landon, so why do it here? Irish whip sends Sophie for the ride, but she ducks a clothesline and responds with a crossbody block... 1... 2... No! Sophie reaches her hand forward and tries to make it to her corner, but is cut short with a kick to the ribs. She falls to her knees and Megan delivers a shot to the back, before dragging Sophie across and tagging in Lorelei. COLE In comes Lorelei, with her opponent compromised, of course. Stomps in the corner earn a warning from the referee and earn the referee a cold glare as Lorelei is forced to bring Sophie out into the ring. Snap suplex and a cover... 1... 2.. No. Lorelei drops a knee to Sophie's midsection and reaches out, tagging Holly in. The crowd boo as The Angel Of Death steps in and steps her black combat boot into Sophie's ribs. Morgan continues to shy away from everything around her and makes no eye contact with Holly, who scoops up Sophie and slams her to the mat. With a scowl on her face Holly backs up and glances Morgan's way as she comes off the ropes. But that momentary distraction costs her, as Sophie rolls out of the way of an elbowdrop. "YAAAAAAAAAAY!" Quickly across to her corner, Sophie tags to Melody. COACH Oh, this geek. Powerbar fully charged, Melody comes in a ball of energy. She throws a dropkick, sending Holly head over heels. Holly walks right into a second dropkick. And then a third. Melody lies in wait for Holly to get back up again, hand shaking with anticipation, ready to deliver the JUDO CHOP... ...and Holly just stands there and gives Melody a funny look. So Melody quickly goes low with a drop toehold and oklahoma rolls Holly up instead... 1... 2... No! Holly grumbles to herself as she gets back to her feet, getting frustrated with the speed of Melody. A lunge and grab fails, Melody ducking low and evading. And this time she throws the dreaded JUDO CHOP, bonking Holly right on the top of the head! After a couple of seconds of mild discomfort, Holly realises she's not really that hurt and angrily kicks Melody in the gut, putting her on her BUTT. COLE I think that chop just annoyed Holly. COACH Can you blame her? She's dealing with a nerd. Treat her like one. With Melody left winded and surprised a tag is made, to sister Melissa. Reject's girl smiles from ear to ear as she steps in and starts kicking away at her nerdy Nerdly sibling. Grabbing her by the hair, Melissa throws Melody's face the mat, then turns to pose to the camera. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Melissa picks Melody up and buries a knee to the gut from a clinch. And another. An irish whip then sends Melody off for a back elbow and another batch of posing. All smiles, she shadow-boxes, waiting for Melody to get back up so she can start teeing off. Safe to say Melissa is better at boxing shadows than people though. Her first punch is ducked and she's struck in the face with a Standing Yakuza Kick! COLE Ooh, right to face! That might stop Melissa's preening and posing. COACH That ain't no ordinary face either Michael. That face belongs to the World Champ. He owns that face. So that ain't cool. Tag is made and Molly Nerdly is already halfway to the top rope, ready to fly down onto Melissa with a big Crossbody Block!! COLE Molly taking flight! And Melissa with more than her face to worry about! Completely left reeling by this sudden turnaround, Melissa staggers back to her feet. Molly is waiting with a boot to the gut, before turning her sister over and dishing out the Final Cut (Pro 2)!! 1... 2... 3!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" COACH What!? COLE Say goodnight Melissa, time to go back and get the Champ ready. Or look at yourself in the mirror for a couple of hours. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Melissa Nerdly Eliminated by: Molly Nerdly TEAM MORGAN 5 TEAM HOLLY 4 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Holly and Lorelei are left holding their hands on their heads, while Megan reacts a little quicker and jumps Molly from behind. COLE Well that's an earlier disadvantage for Team Holly, now one girl down. COACH That's okay, plenty of time to recover. Megan clubs away on Molly before looking for an irish whip. Molly is able to reverse the whip and guides Megan into one of the neutral corners. However, she misses with a charge and her controversial Boxoffice Bust crashes into the turnbuckles. Megan turns her around in the corner and starts to go to work, attacking Molly's midsection with a series of middle kicks. COLE There's that kickboxing offence of Megan. Those feet, very proficient. COACH Yeah and they're pretty effective too. COLE ..... With Molly hurt, Lorelei is eager to come back in and gets her wish. Lining up Molly in the corner she charges and puts her rear-end to good use with a running BUTT smash, crushing Molly against the lower turnbuckles. COLE No love lost between Molly and Lorelei, former allies within The Enterprise until the big fallout with Ned Blanchard and Theodore Moneymaker. COACH No love lost between Lorelei and anyone on Morgan's team. Not me though. I got plenty o'love for her. One day.... After dishing out a double axehandle to Molly's back, Lorelei walks over to her opponents' corner and taunts them by throwing a roll of twenty dollar bills from off of her ring attire! Throwing the money at them doesn't prove much of an insult though. Especially when Maya reaches into the ring and snaps up all the bills in astonishingly quick time. A costly insult is then added to as Lorelei is then flung face-first into the corner by a smart move from Molly. COACH What's with all the abuse to the faces here!? Lay off a little, girls! Tag is made and Jade comes in for the first time, to a hearty cheer. She goes to work on Lorelei with forearm shots in the corner before bringing her out with a big running Bulldog!! JADE WHAT'S UP TORONTO!? "YYYYYAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY!!" Maya briefly glances up and shrugs. MAYA That was probably lame. But, I don't give a hoot, I'm already up 140 bucks! Trying to weasel her way out of the ring Lorelei tries to cut a deal and suggest she and Jade should both make a friendly, unrestricted tag to someone else. But she gets a big NO DEAL and popped in the face with a left hand! Jade then paws her with an open right. With a guttural shout, Jade then pulls a 360 and knocks Lorelei down with a big clothesline! COLE And Jade is ROLLING~! Lorelei tries to get to her corner but has her foot caught by Jade. However, a firm kick with the free leg catches Jade right in the breadbasket and she's forced to let Lorelei go, allowing a tag to Megan. Skye comes in and goes right for the kill, aiming high with the CHICK KICK... but Jade ducks and catches Megan on the way back around with a front dropkick to the chest! COACH Her head was nearly rolling there, rolling back up the aisle. COLE But Jade managed to avoid the kick and now back in comes Melody. A little too eager to come in, Melody is forced to check her run. And by the time she's 360'd back around, Megan is waiting and hangs Melody across the top rope with a hotshot! COLE The momentum is shifting back and forth in this one. A real rollercoaster ride for the team captains, or so you'd think, but I'm not even sure Morgan has looked up once since this match started. Megan grabs hold of Melody by the hair and takes her over to a corner. Hopping to the middle rope, Skye sets up for a Tornado DDT. But Melody fights out. Breaking free of Megan's facelock, she takes a step back and unleashes a thunderous SHORYUKEN, causing nerds and geeks around the world to wet themselves with sheer joy! Coincidentally, some of whom sit in this wrestling audience. "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" Knocked silly Megan slumps forward and falls off the ropes, right onto Melody's shoulders. Melody carries Megan to the middle of the ring and delivers a big TKO, then rolls on top... 1... 2... 3!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE And just like that, Team Holly are down by two! And Holly cannot believe her eyes! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Megan Skye Eliminated by: Melody Nerdly TEAM MORGAN 5 TEAM HOLLY 3 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Megan is rolled out of the ring, Holly is left with just Lorelei and Malaysia for company and berates her latest beaten team-mate. For the first time in virtually the whole match, Morgan glances up and looks around to see her 'team' with the numbers advantage, almost enough to bring her out of her shell. COLE This is not going the way Holly was expected. Or, I'm sure, the way Josie Baker was expecting. A five to three deficit! COACH If there's one consolation for Holly though, it's that one of those three is Malaysia and she almost counts for two by herself. Having had enough of this crap Holly steps into the ring with a purpose, trying to lead by example. She goes right on the attack on Melody, who is quickly overwhelmed, but manages to fight her way out from Holly's flying fists. Running away to create some distance, she lures Holly in and evades her again, getting across to tag Jade. COLE And Morgan's team making plenty of quick tags, except to Morgan herself. Jade beats Holly to the punch as she comes in and fends Holly off with forearms before she hits the ropes. Able to duck a clothesline, Jade knocks Holly down with a thesz press... 1... 2... No. Rolled off of Holly, Jade quickly picks herself up and dishes out an open left hand. And then an open right. Before Jade can go for the spinning clothesline though Holly reaches out and rakes Jade's eyes! COLE Holly getting desperate. COACH Are you kidding? She'd rake the eyes of a corpse if she thought it would hurt. With Jade momentarily blinded Holly tries to charge at her, only to be blocked off with an elbow. With enough vision left to tag Jade gets over to bring Sophie into the match. The French girl waits for Holly to charge in again and navigates around it, into a schoolgirl... 1... 2... No! Holly goes to grab Sophie's hair, but is tripped up and rolled back onto her shoulders... 1... 2... No! COACH Man, Holly needs to watch herself. If she gets pinned and it's 5 on 2, that ain't gonna go down well with the boss-girl. Tumbling over with Holly, Sophie scrambles back to her feet as well. The French girl ducks a wild clothesline and reaches up, hooking Holly with a neckbreaker! Lorelei despairs from the outside, as Sophie comes off the ropes and follows up with a Big Splash... 1... 2... Kickout! As Holly gets back up Sophie tries to take control and grabs a side headlock. She's turned away from her corner though and thrown to the ropes. Sophie tries to make lemonade out of citrons, preparing to throw a clothesline. But Holly cuts Sophie off with a well-placed boot. Holly then takes a step to the side and SLAMS her combat boot into the side of Sophie's head! COLE Ooh! COACH Dayyum! Sophie looks shocked to have been hit so hard and holds her ear in pain. Hauling Sophie right back up, Holly takes aim, flinging the French girl hard into the turnbuckles. As she staggers out, Sophie then suffers another kick to the gut and is given a dose of PERCUSSION to her already ringing head! COLE That's going to do it for Sophie, I'm afraid. 1... 2... 3!!! COACH That oughta even things up a little bit. COLE That kick to the head was just too much to recover from. Sophie's bell was well and truly rung. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Sophie Eliminated by: Holly TEAM MORGAN 4 TEAM HOLLY 3 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Sophie rolls outside into friendly arms, Jade comes in to replace her and lays into Holly with some forearm shots. Holly cuts Jade off with a knee to the gut, then rears back and delivers one hard right hand to drop Little Miss California. She then tags in Lorelei, who quickly sends Jade off the ropes. Jade ducks underneath a clothesline though, waiting for Lorelei to turn around and delivering the Sweet Dreams! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Jade looks over to her corner and points to Morgan, asking the crowd if they want to see her in. COLE Looks like we might see the team captain in for the first time... or, maybe not. Continuing to shy away from any contact with her team Morgan hangs her head and sadly shakes it, not wanting to come in. Jade asks the crowd to make a little more noise, hoping that will help. And Maya tries to convince Morgan from the outside. COACH Come on, if the girl doesn't want in, she don't want in. Leave her alone. COLE They're just trying to include Morgan in the match, what's so wrong about that? COACH They want her to get beat so she won't turn around and zap them, that's what they want. COLE I don't think so. Finally, after much coaxing, Morgan meekly reaches out her hand and makes the tag. And some of the crowd cheer, which takes her a little off-guard. Jade holds Lorelei in place, a look of fear on the Money Honey's face as Morgan walks in and gives her a boot in the ribs. COLE Teamwork from Morgan and Jade! Lorelei shuffles back into a corner and tries to beg off from Morgan. Her pleas of "WE'RE STILL FRIENDS" fall on deaf ears though and she's dragged to her feet... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...for a knifedge strike to the chest! *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" And another. Her assets stinging, Lorelei reaches out and shoves Morgan away. It's only when Morgan picks herself back up when Lorelei realises what she's done, seeing the look on the Women's Champion's face. And before Lorelei even has a chance to beg off Morgan unleashes with a Lightning Kick, repeatedly kicking Lorelei in the corner. COLE And Morgan, unleashing her fury on Lorelei! Couldn't happen to a nicer person! COACH What are you talking about? Lorelei gave Morgan everything she ever wanted. Love, loyalty, safety, money. And this is how you get repaid? Once Lorelei is beaten down sufficiently, Morgan whips her former "friend" out of the corner. Lorelei gets her foot up on the turnbuckle to stop another collision, then sticks out an elbow to nail Morgan coming in. A bodyslam puts Morgan down and suddenly a vengeful look comes over Lorelei's face. She smiles an evil smile, grabbing Morgan's wrist and dragging her over. Lorelei then looks up at Malaysia... but as she goes to tag her, Holly intercepts the tag and comes in instead. COACH Uh-oh, Holly wants in and she wants a piece of Morgan! Holly goes right to work with her heavy boots, stomping the tiny frame of the Women's Champion repeatedly. Poor Morgan is rocked with every stomp and she tries to cover up, as the referee moves in to get Holly to back up. The ref manages to keep Holly at bay long enough for Morgan to pick herself up, letting out a SCREAM of rage and DIVING onto Holly with a wild frenzy of slaps and scratches!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COACH SHIT JUST GOT REAL! Ripping and clawing at each other Holly and Morgan roll around on the mat, as everyone else looks on helplessly. Lorelei steps in ready to break the fight up, as does Jade, cancelling each other out while Morgan and Holly roll underneath the bottom rope and land in a heap on the arena floor... and then keep fighting some more!! COLE These two are GOING AT IT! I don't think there's enough people in this building to pull Morgan and Holly apart! COACH They might have to wait until one of them has ripped the other's flesh off and they're just dealing with a carcass! As the fight continues, the referee stands over the ropes, helplessly to do anything except count. Morgan and Holly pay absolutely no attention to that, too busy trying to claw each other's eyes out and choke each other unconscious. And it doesn't take long for the referee to reach ten (roughly ten seconds, as luck would have it!) and signal to the outside. COLE I tell you what, if OAOAST officials sign these two to another one on one match, we may never have seen a fight like it! These two aren't trying to beat each other. They're trying to HARM each other! Referees pile out from the back and the action in the ring has stopped, everybody transfixed on this war unfolding in front of them. It takes at least 8 people to pull Holly and Morgan apart. 8 brave men, Holly and Morgan kicking and lashing out in an attempt to get at each other again. "LET THEM FIGHT!" "LET THEM FIGHT!" "LET THEM FIGHT!" "LET THEM FIGHT!" COACH No, don't let them fight! They're gonna rip each other to shreds! Morgan starts throwing a fit, clearly not happy with being manhandled by four referees telling her to calm down. And as she starts to freak out, Maya rushes over to try and help out, seeing Morgan in distress. Maya's way seems to work a little better than the referees. But all of a sudden, Holly breaks free of the referees restraining her and BOOTS Morgan right in the head, sending her flying back against the barricade!!!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" COLE Oh, what a cheapshot! What a cheapshot! Morgan lays hurt on the floor as Holly is restrained again and dragged away by the referees. A camera follows her up the ramp, which even on PPV is a bad idea and sends the bleep button into overdrive. COLE We apologise for those comments by Holly... uhm, all of them. I think we've finally got some order restored here but at the cost of Morgan being hit with a vicious kick, which she didn't even see coming. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the referee has ruled that both Holly and Morgan Nerdly have been COUNTED OUT! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Morgan Nerdly and Holly Eliminated by: Double CO TEAM MORGAN 3 TEAM HOLLY 2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The remaining referees and Maya try to tend to Morgan and help her to the back, Holly now hauled off and out of earshot. Thankfully. COLE So that's both team captains gone. And what are we left with... we've got Melody, Molly and Jade on one side. And on the other, Lorelei DeCenzo and Malaysia, who has yet to tag in during this entire match. Don't expect that to last long. As the two remaining teams regroup, Melody steps in for her team. Lorelei assumes leadership with Holly gone and she tries to motivate Malaysia, before sending her into the ring. COACH What a gracious woman, finally letting Malaysia have her turn in the ring. Unselfish to a fault, Lorelei DeCenzo. COLE That's one way of looking at it. If you're an idiot. Malaysia squares up to her nerdiest sister and dares her to take a free shot. Melody knows too much about her sister to fall for that though and dodges behind, trying to put Malaysia out with a sleeper hold. Hands on hips, Malaysia doesn't seem concerned and reaches up, dumping Melody over to the mat. Dusting herself off, Melody moves in again, but gets grabbed by the throat! Melody bats at Malaysia's arm, trying to break her grip. A firm shove sends The Game Genie stumbling back against the ropes, bouncing her back into an equally firm boot to the chest! COLE There has never been a competitor in the women's division so physically dominant as Malaysia. You think of all the success Krista and Alix have had against the male competitors, but a lot of that success comes from technique and strategy. Malaysia is an absolute powerhouse! Picking Melody back up, Malaysia rears back and brings a booming forearm down across the back. Another hard forearm leaves Melody wincing in pain. Thrown to the ropes, Melody ducks under a clothesline though, coming back with a flying body tackle. Clumsy and not very elegant, it doesn't do much but stagger Malaysia. Melody tries again, with the same result. So she hits the ropes a third time and catches Malaysia in a sunset flip... 1... 2... No! Melody stomps on Malaysia as she gets back up, not doing enough to keep her down. Hitting the ropes again Melody looks to dish out some Nerdly Revenge, going for the Wheelbarrow Bulldog... ...but Malaysia shoves Melody down, face-first into the mat! "OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Like she was nothin'! Grabbing onto Melody's feet before they fall out of reach, Malaysia quickly steps through and applies the Inverted Boston Crab!! Melody thinks about crawling for the ropes, but not for long, before tapping out! COACH One down. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Melody Nerdly Eliminated by: Malaysia Nerdly TEAM MORGAN 2 TEAM HOLLY 2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Molly jumps Malaysia as soon as she lets Melody go, but does little better in inflicting damage on big sister. In no mood for taking shit, Malaysia grabs Molly and takes her over to a corner, then starts driving shoulders into the ribs. COACH Like. She. Was. Nothin'! COLE Malaysia is taking the fight to her sisters. There's no such thing as a handicap match in her mind. And now the sides have been evened up. After working Molly over with the shoulders, Malaysia whips her across the ring and delivers a crushing Avalanche!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE And look at the big smile on Lorelei's face. COACH Even money couldn't buy a better partner. Molly falls to her knees gasping for air. Hanging her sister over the rope, Malaysia chokes her against the middle rope with a sinister smile on her face. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" Malaysia lets go of Molly, only to place her head the other side of the ropes and pull back on the hair this time! "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" COACH Just like the good ol' days up the road in Edmonton at the Nerdly compound. COLE House. COACH Same thing. Dragging Molly back up, Malaysia sends her away to arm's length, then drags her back into a forearm shot. Molly falls to her knees again. Malaysia decides to inflict some more pain by pulling back on the hair again, then breaking the count by throwing Molly face-first into the mat. Over in the corner Jade and Maya do their best to encourage Molly, but it's clear she's completely at her sister's mercy. Especially when her neck is stepped on and she's left trapped in place, unable to escape. COLE This doesn't look good at all for Molly. Or for Jade. Picked back up, Molly is scooped up into Malaysia's arms with ease. And then thrown with even more ease, right across the ring with a Fallaway Slam! JADE COME ON MOLLY! YOU CAN DO IT! MAYA SAVE YOURSELF! RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN! JADE MAYA Sorry, gotta stay on message, huh? Malaysia waits for Molly to pick herself back up and charges at her, aiming with a hard Yakuza kick to the chest... but Molly sidesteps and goes for a backslide! COLE Look at this, a counter! COACH No way. No way. No way is right, Molly without the strength to pull Malaysia down. And what was a nice idea turns out to be the beginning of the end, as Malaysia turns around and grabs Molly in a gutwrench. Jade watches on, fearful for her team-mate, knowing exactly how it feels to suffer the CANADIAN BACKBREAKER PILEDRIVER!!!! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COACH Bye bye boobies. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Molly Nerdly Eliminated by: Malaysia Nerdly TEAM MORGAN 1 TEAM HOLLY 2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With Molly thrown aside Malaysia looks over to the last girl standing on the opposition. Trepidation would be a good way to describe Jade's mood at this point, despite the support of the Toronto crowd starting up. Lorelei leans over the ropes and pats Malaysia on the back for a job well done, a big smile on her face. COLE And what a position this leaves Jade in. COACH Her only hope is to turn tail and run. No lie. Malaysia is just slayin' girls. And if that weren't bad enough, she's got someone just as dominant waiting on the apron to be tagged and do the same! COLE Are you kidding me? Jade slowly climbs into the ring and squares up with Malaysia, no stranger to the most dominant Nerdly of the bunch. Malaysia smiles down at Jade and remarks "long time, no see", about as unnervingly as is humanly possible. But Jade doesn't back down and unloads with forearms shots! Getting about four in, Jade has the presence of mind to duck underneath a swing from Malaysia and catch her with another four or five quick strikes. COLE Jade has found the formula to beat Malaysia in the past. Hit and run, try and keep this mighty woman on her toes. Failing, Jade is suddenly on her toes, thanks to Malaysia gripping the top of her cheerleader costume and nearly lifting her feet off the mat. A careless shove sends Jade tumbling back into a corner. But as Malaysia charges, Jade dodges out of the way and Malaysia hits the turnbuckles. Jumping up, Jade pins Malaysia in... "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" "FIVE!" "SIX!" "SEVEN!" "EIGHT!" ...and no more, Malaysia suddenly lifting Jade up off the ropes and holding her by the throat! COLE Uh-oh! Malaysia leaves Jade hanging for a few seconds before dropping her the considerable distance to the mat. The back of Jade's head bounces off the mat and Malaysia places her foot on her body... 1... 2... Kickout! Jade slowly crawls to the ropes, needing their help to get to her feet. Stalking right behind, Malaysia waits for Jade to reach out, then stands on her hand! COLE Malaysia is startig to enjoy herself. In that sick, twisted way of her's. Pulled back to her feet, Jade is struck in the chest with a forearm and crumbles to the mat. "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" Maya plays cheerleader, realising her sister needs some help. All the fans in the world joining hands and spelling out Jade's name with multi-coloured flashlights probably wouldn't do much good against Malaysia though. She tries to fight back, punching Malaysia in the breadbasket. Malaysia just shrugs the shots off though, clubbing Jade in the back to snuff her out. Reaching down, Malaysia then scoops Jade up and delivers a big Side Slam! LORELEI MALAYSIA! TAG! TAG ME IN! Not used to get orders, outside of foreplay at least, Malaysia looks at Lorelei with some curiousity as she demands the tag. So Lorelei takes it upon herself and pats her partner on the shoulder. COLE I guess Lorelei's satisfied that Malaysia's done the work. And now she wants the glory. COACH Well that's cool. Malaysia enjoys doing the work more than she would the glory anyway. Lorelei picks up right away, putting the boots to the defenceless Jade to the disgust of the crowd. Revelling in it Lori gives the "money fingers" to the crowd as she picks Jade up. COACH Looking good, Lori! After a couple of blows across the back Lorelei loads Jade up, whipping her to the ropes. Lorelei attempts a back elbow, but Jade ducks underneath and gets ready to throw a big forearm. However, Lorelei catches her. Jade elbows her way out of the uranage attempt, only for Lorelei to grab hold of the hair and tug Little Miss California down to the mat by it. Boos rain down on The Money Honey as she hooks Jade up, a smirk on her face. Hooking the leg, she takes Jade up, looking for the Cash Flow... BUT JADE COUNTERS WITH AN INSIDE CRADLE... 1... 2... 3!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" LORELEI ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Lorelei DeCenzo Eliminated by: Jade Rodez-Duncan TEAM MORGAN 1 TEAM HOLLY 1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lorelei looks stunned and hounds the referee, refusing to believe what happened. COLE A lapse of concentration from Lorelei and she is gone! What a move from Jade! And we're down to one on one! Rubbing Lorelei's face in defeat, the wacky dance of Maya Duncan-Blanchard just makes the loss all the harder for Lorelei to bare. She finally leaves the ring, bitching out people in the crowd as they wave her goodbye. COLE Looks like The Money Honey finally got too greedy. COACH Oh you're just bringing the laughs tonight, aren't you? BOOOOOO! You suck! This is horrible. With Lorelei gone, Jade drags herself to the ropes. Weary and winded, she hangs against the ropes, watching on disheartened as she sees Malaysia stepping back into the ring to face her again. Malaysia doesn't look concerned about being left on her own. Far from it. She smiles and waves for Jade to get back to her feet. "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" Determined not to let anyone down Jade picks herself up and squares up to Malaysia one more time. COLE After all the battles these two had last year, this is what it comes down to tonight. Jade and Malaysia. Once she's summouned up some energy, Jade prepares to throw the first shot, but Malaysia beats her to it by grabbing her around the throat! Jade fights and struggles but Malaysia backs her across the ring, into a corner. The referee gives Malaysia a five count and she breaks on four, to throw a big forearm... but Jade dodges out of the way. Right hands start flying as Jade tries to take advantage of this opportunity, wailing away on Malaysia. Jade then tries an irish whip. But Malaysia doesn't budge. COLE Uh-oh. No go! Jade's eyes widen as Malaysia pulls her back in and throws a short clothesline. Jade avoids it though. Finding herself in the corner, Jade quickly kicks up off the turnbuckles, thrusting her boots into the chest of Malaysia. Malaysia staggers back as Jade hops to the middle rope. After an appeal to the crowd Jade then leaps forward, hooking Malaysia for what looks like a swinging DDT... but Malaysia CATCHES Jade! Stopping short of being DDTed, Malaysia lifts Jade back up on her shoulder and drops her over her head with ease! COLE What a show of power, just deadlifting Jade and backdropping her like she was nothing. Freakish. COACH Oh, she's a freak alright. COLE I didn't mean in that way. COACH She's a freak in many ways. As Jade picks herself up, Malaysia lays in wait. Off the ropes she delivers a running boot to the chest and covers... 1... 2... No! Malaysia smirks to herself as she leads Jade back to her feet. Slipping behind she applies a rear naked choke and watches as Jade struggles for every breath. Jade tries to fight the hold and quickly sinks to her knees, being choked out. COLE Look at that sick smile on the face of Malaysia. Jade is going out and she knows it. COACH I don't think that's what she's smiling about Mikey. She's smiling about what she's going to do once Jade's defenceless! Hitting the ring mat in a desperate attempt to keep her sister awake Maya looks on, concerned. Jade hears this and tries to fight back. She manages to get a hand in between her throat and Malaysia's arm, aleviating a bit of the pressure and allowing her to get back to one knee. But Malaysia just lets her go. And as Jade regains much needed breath, Malaysia comes off the ropes again. Jade stands back up, just as Malaysia aims another boot at the chest... ...but Jade sidesteps! Leaping onto Malaysia's back she tries a sleeper hold of her own, but Malaysia is too strong and backs Jade into the turnbuckles. Jade lets go of the sleeper, but doesn't let Malaysia go, moving up onto her shoulders and taking her down with a Victory Roll!! 1... 2... NO! COLE Couldn't hold Malaysia down. A good idea though. It may take a quick pin or roll-up to win this. Jade gets up on the ropes again and looks to the crowd for some more support, as she takes off... ...and gets CAUGHT again! Malaysia smiles and then throws Jade back over her head with a Fallaway Slam, as Maya gives a resigned shake of the head. COLE That, however, was not such a good idea. Stalking over to where Jade landed, Malaysia licks her lips. Dragging Jade back up she takes her time, slowly and deliberately hooking Jade in a gutwrench position. Malaysia then hoists Jade up over her shoulder... and Jade, realising she's in a bad place, starts to fight. Able to squirm free Jade manages to slip free and land on her feet behind Malaysia, to the relief of the crowd. As Malaysia turns around, Jade lands a forearm. And another. Neither with much behind them. COLE Jade not giving up here, she's giving everything she has. COACH And even that's not enough. With a kick to the gut, Jade doubles Malaysia over and leaps over top, looking for a sunset flip. Malaysia stands firm though and reaches down, picking Jade back up by the throat! Jade breaks free, going to the midsection with another kick. COLE Malaysia just can't seem to put Jade away here! Jade tries to whip Malaysia into a corner, but it's reversed. There's still enough left in Little Miss California to make one more leap to the ropes, landing on the middle ready to counter-attack. But Malaysia closes her down. And suddenly, fear hits Jade, as she's caught on the ropes. Malaysia reaches up and pulls Jade down onto her shoulder, carrying her away from the corner and DRIVING her down into the mat with the Piledriver!!! "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COACH Well, that oughta put her away. Malaysia sits for a second, smiling sinisterly, before turning Jade over... 1... 2... 3!!! *DINGDINGDING!* The crowd give a dejected boo, a boo that was already resigned to defeat. Maya hangs her head on the apron as Malaysia hovers over Jade, still grinning. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner and SOLE SURVIVOR... MALAYSIA NEEEERRDDLLLYYYYYY!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Jade Rodez-Duncan Eliminated by: Malaysia Nerdly SOLE SURVIVOR: MALAYSIA NERDLY ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Malaysia stands over Jade, the referee hesitant to even raise her hand in victory for fear of what she might do. COLE The battle began with Holly and Morgan, looking to get the upper hand over the other. But in the end, it's the dominance of Malaysia that is the story. She may not be much of a team player, but she didn't need to be tonight. Just too big, too strong and too powerful. Malaysia leaves the ring, looking back briefly at what she's left behind, before she walks off content with her work.

Now I’m that BITCH! Now I’m that BITCH! Now I’m that BITCH! Now I’m that BITCH! Livvi Franc’s “Now I’m that bitch” instantly switches to Another Body Murdered by Faith No More. Anger! Anger I tells ya! That’s the precise emotion that welcomes team captain Holly into the ring. Wearing a plaid mini skirt, and a cut-off to the chest black mesh top over a red bikini top, Holly cuts a pretty but fearsome image. She snarls at the camera, almost knocking the poor videographer over on her way to the ramp. BUFFER The following is a ten woman survivor series match! Now making her way to the ring, from Sin City, Nevada, she is THE ANGEL OF DEATH HOLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYY! “BOOOOOOOOOO!” Red spotlights flicker in the background, as Holly stomps down the ramp, cursing out everyone she lays eyes on. She slides into the ring, popping to her feet with a nasty glare at the referee. Holly then leans against the ring ropes, looking out at the masses and chiding every last one of them for booing her. COACH Josie’s put a lot of faith in Holly, and Holly’s gotta put a lot of faith in her team. I ain’t so sure Holly is that trusting, though. COLE They're going to have to come through as a group because Holly can't do this five on one. Cue: “Renegade” by Jay-Z and Eminem Melissa Nerdly struts on stage in an 80’s throwback exercise outfit, of purple tights, and red swimsuit style top. On the rear end of her tights Reject's Girl is scribbled in cursive lettering. She stretches out on the top of the ramp, hitting a few jumping jacks, before moseing down to ringside. BUFFER And her partner, from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, MELISSAAAAA NERDLYYYYYY! COLE The Nerdly family well represented here at November Reign in their home country of Canada. Melissa gently steps into the ring where she feels the need to pose to a less than receptive audience. Seeing Melissa’s annoyance, Holly brow beats the fans for their lack of respect. Things start to get a little wild thanks to Motley Crue’s “Wild Side”. The fans jeer and boo as the mighty Malaysia Nerdly makes her appearance on stage. She raises her arms into the air, while white lights swirl in a frantic pace all around her. The sadistic Nerdly comes bound in a leather corset and black denim pants. She laughs haughtily at the frightened crowd before making her to the ramp. BUFFER From Edmonton, Alberta Canada, she is the ultimate combination of Beauty and Beatdowns….SHE IS MALAYSIAAAAAA NERDDLLLLLLYYYYYY! COLE From one Deadly Alliance member to the next! Both looking to make their mark on the women’s dvision. The former champion stands on the outside, cracking her whip and delighting in scaring the fans with it. Holly and Melissa keep their distance, because frankly Malaysia is a little worrisome! Oasis’ Slide Away fires up bringing out the no nonsense Megan Skye. Less no non sense is her intricate tights. Black leather pants with the Cucaracha Internacional logo on the left thigh and a yellow line down the legs. Black leather top with a yellow one underneath, just visible around the arms and cleavage. Black elbowpads, black boots with yellow soles. She grumbles to herself about something no dobut relating to Landon, and heads to ringside. BUFFER And representing Cucaracha Internacional she is from Providence, Rhode Island, MEGAN SKYEEEEEEEE! BOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Megan doesn’t much care for the crowd’s reaction, and instead goes straight to Holly to discuss strategy. COACH There’s a woman with a lot of plans, and a lot of clothes, lose some of that shizzzzz girl, keep it lookin good and skimpy! M O N E Y So sexy Damn, I love the jam, the jet and the mansion. (Oh yeah) And I enjoy the gifts and the trips to the islands.(Oh yeah) Its good to live expensive You know it, but my knees get weak intensive When you give me k-kisses Thats money honey, Well I'm your lover and your mistress Thats money honey When you touch me, its so delicious Thats money honey Baby when you tell me the pieces Thats money honey COLE Lorelei’s earning the big bucks tonight, this is her 3rd appearance on the show! Lady Gaga's Money Honey rings out over the numerous boos from the arena crowd. Stepping onto the Angleslam set is Lorelei DeCenzo, wearing black booty shorts and a ruffled pink featherd top, twirls around to show off her impressive body before pointing to the ring. Nodding to herself she heads down the entrance ramp with nose firmly stuck in the air to avoid interaction with the audience. BUFFER She comes from Manhattan Beach, California, representing The Enterprise she is a former women's champion….THE MONEY HONEY LORELEI DECENZOOOOOO! "BOOOOOOOOO!" the fans spit venom at Lorelei, who wags her fingers at them. COLE And here’s someone that knows Morgan all to well, no doubt an asset when teaming against her. COACH Or a liability if Morgan snaps on her. Lorelei enters the ring, brushing aside her team in order to have the full ring to strike a beauteous pose in. Melissa scoffs at such actions, obviously considering herself to be the fairer of the two. BUFFER And the opponents….. “I MAKE THEM GOOD GIRLS GO BAD I MAKE THEM GOOD GIRLS GO GOOD GIRLS GO BAD!” YEAAAAAAAAAA! Bouncing out from backstage is film buff and NYU Art Student, Molly Nerdly. The self-proclaimed smartest of the bunch, wheels around through the entrance doors in a black leather jacket and a faux fur black micro skit. In a gesture similar to Halloween Spectacular, she smiles to the crowd as she rips away her jacket to reveal a triangle bikini top that shows plenty of skin! COACH Woah mama! What’s papa Nerdly got in them genes? COLE His penis. COACH His….wha….not those kind of jeans! BUFFER From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, she is the 2009 manager of the year, MOLLYYYYYY NERDLLLLYYYYYYY! Molly frames up the gathered heels in the ring, and gives them a cold THUMBS DOWN! Needless to say this sets Holly off, and its only the oncoming entrance music that shields us from her profane tirade. "Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy) And you don’t care what they say See, every time you turn around They screamin' your name Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy) And you don’t care what they say See, every time you turn around They screamin' your name" The lights flash purple and white when "When I Grow Up" by The Pussycat Dolls hits. Seconds later the dynamic cheerleading duo of Jade Rodez-Duncan and little sister Maya Duncan-Blanchard run onto the stage to a HUGE ovation! No boobs so less than Molly. Either way the girls fire up the rabid audience, while Molly claps for their arrival. BUFFER Residing in Los Angeles, California... the second generation starlet with a heart of gold... ladies and gentlemen, she is accompanied by Maya Duncan-Blanchard... "LITTLE MISS CALIFORNIA"... JJJJAAAAAAADDEEEEEE... RRRRROOOOODDEEEEEEZZZZZZ - DDUUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAANN!!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" COLE Well, Morgan actually got Jade as a volunteer for this match up thanks to her sister Maya. It should be noted Maya got Alfdogg onto Team Alix as well. No extra credit for her social services classes at school, though. "When I grow up I wanna be famous I wanna be a star I wanna be in movies When I grow up I wanna see the world Drive nice cars I wanna have Groupies" Molly gets a big hug from Jade as she reaches the ring apron. Maya continues working up the now standing and roaring audience, while also soliciting them to buy girl scout cookies. Gotta move those Thin Mints. Fallout Boy's cover of "Beat It" powers through the arena and out comes the queen of Geekdom, Melody Nerdly! Multi-coloured strobe lights freak out around her as she strikes a Matrix style pose, befitting of her Matrix style all leather outfit. With seizures caused around the world by her far out light display, Melody makes her way to the ring with a skip in her step. BUFFER This contest is scheduled for one fall and is for the OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first, the challenger. Eminating from the Fortress Of Nerdlytude... she is "PLAYER ONE"... MMMMEEEEELLLLLLLLLLOOOOODDYYYYYYY... NNEEEEEERRRRRRRDDLLLLLLYYYYYYYYY!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" Melody catches up with her teammates and proceeds to offer them advice in the form of Yoda quotes. Oddly enough, Jade seems to seriously consider each piece of Star Wars knowledge. :CUE: Sophie comes onto the stage waving and greeting the cheering audience as red and blue lights flash behind her. She wears a white tank top with her name etched on the back, black workout pants, and white tennis shoes that carry her down the entrance ramp. The French girl is all smiles as she shakes hands, and high fives the front row OAOAST Marks. BUFFER She comes from Marseilles, France, she is SOPHIE GREEEEEYYYYYY! Sophie jogs to the rest of her team, and exchanges kisses on the cheeks. Because that’s what the French do, see? A male fan tries to get in the action but he’s warded off by Melody’s Hadoken. The dizzyingly frantic symbols and the ripping adrenaline of flow into the arena like a volcanic eruption. “OHHHHHHHHHH!” the fans murmur, knowing full well the danger that lies behind the entrance doors GO! To un-explain the unforgivable, Drain all the blood and give the kids a show. By streetlight this dark night, A séance down below. There are things that I have done, You never should ever know! And without you is how I disappear, And live my life alone forever now. And without you is how I disappear, And live my life alone forever now. Bolts of electricity crash down like bombs onto the stage, exploding into blinding sparks. All across the arena, video screens are filled with the image of flickering electricity. The stage lies carpeted by a serene yet evil blue light. The most powerful burst of electricity scorches through the air and touches down in the middle of the stage. That’s when the youthful challenger first appears on stage, earning an intimidated reaction from the frightened crowd. Morgan wears a pinstriped booty shorted romper over her tiny frame. She chews on her blond hair nervously, and watches the crowd with the same frightened look they give her. There is however a noticeable section of the teenage crowd greeting Morgan with cheers. Angsty teenagers>>>>* BUFFER From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada... she THE OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION!! Prepare for SHOCK and awe from MMMOOOOOOORRRRRGGAAAAAAANN... NNEEEERRRRRDDLLLLLYYYYYYYY!!! Can you hear me cry out to you? Words I thought I'd choke on figure out. I'm really not so with you anymore. I'm just a ghost, So I can't hurt you anymore, So I can't hurt you anymore. And now, you wanna see how far down I can sink? Let me go, fuck! So, you can, well now so, you can I'm so far away from you. Well now so, you can. Morgan gets into the ring and stands on the first rope, while leaning over the third. She casts a quizzical glance at the audience, almost childlike in its odd innocence. COACH She didn’t even glance once at her team. Not once. Everyone is buddy and she totally ignores them. COLE Well, Morgan does have a hard time trusting people. She’s not going to suddenly change over night. COACH No its that these girls can’t be trusted, one’s French and a coward, another spends her days locked in a cavern playing dungeons and dragons with pokemon dolls, they’re all untrustworthy except for Molly because she’ll flash you and that’s hot!

extra space if needed

COLE And now, folks, we're gonna go on location to Toronto's uptown roll arena! It's time for the Skate or Die match for the OAOAST Heartland title! Cut to the rink, where a DJ is seen behind glass. NOTE: Visual aid for the match. DJ Yo yo yo, ladies and gentlemen, a little somethin' special for y'all tonight! The OAOAST is in the house! The Heartland title is on the line! This is DJ AX, and I'm gonna introduce the participants! The participants are shown surrounding the rink, which already has people skating on it. DJ AX Show some love for the BURROUGH BOYS! Mariano! Luther! Waldo! Quincy! COLE And there's paying customers on this rink, Coach! Let's hope no one gets hurt here. COACH Of course not, Cole, this is a Heartland title match! DJ AX The Superheroes of Dance! Vinny Valentine! Biff Atlas! PANIC AT THE DISCO! Vinny does a little dance, as Tony Tourettes stands by, also wearing skates. DJ AX The man behind the mask! J-MAX! J-MAX raises his arms in the air. DJ AX Uno and Dos! The Voo Doo Daddies! LOS CONQUISTADORES! Uno and Dos are shown talking back and forth with Colombian Heat. DJ AX Yo, this girl's got a fever, and we got the cure! Anderson and Pigley, THE LOVE DOCTORS! The Docs do a dance as the ladies scream from the rink. DJ AX Someone be kind and donate a little change for DEADBEAT DAVE! Vinny and Biff clap as Dave holds his arms out. DJ AX The Bad Boy himself, COLOMBIAN HEAT! Heat throws up the "W". DJ AX No fightin' the law tonight, we got the V.I.C.E. squad in the house! CPA and Bosley, reppin' the Enterprise! Bosley talks smack to Todd Cortez. DJ AX "Urban Legend"...or just a Legend? TODD CORTEZ! Cortez pounds his chest and raises a fist in the air. DJ AX This is a Skate or Die match, but things are still getting deadly! From the Deadly Alliance, MR. DICK, and Mr. Heartland himself, SANDMAN9000! The DA members raise their arms. DJ AX And finally, our defending champion! He puts the "Heart" in Heartland, and the "Jam" in Jamaica! The OAOAST Heartland champion, DENZEL SPENCER! Denzel raises his arms, then DJ AX blows a horn and the combatants walk onto the rink, and begin to attempt to slug it out while on skates. Various songs play in the background, as some of the combatants start to gain speed around the rink. CPA and Bosley lift Heat onto their shoulders, with CPA holding him around the head and Bosley holding him around the waist. However, this leaves them open to a surging Denzel, who leaves his feet and flies into Heat, which causes CPA and Bosley to fall to the ground as well! COLE Nice move there by Denzel, as he's putting this environment to good use right away! Suddenly the track scratches, and Black Sweat by Prince hits. COLE Oh wait, this is a familiar song... COACH Oh fuck, is that what I think it is? The camera cuts to the front door, where MISTER Warrior bursts through and pounds his chest. COACH DAMN it. MISTER Warrior rolls over to the half wall, and hops over it onto the rink. He gains speed around the rink while pumping his arms in the air, then floors Quincy with a clothesline! He then hits Biff! Waldo! Luther! Mariano! Dave! Vinny! He pounds his chest, then crashes waist-first into the half wall and flips over it into the carpeted area. COLE Well, that was exciting! MISTER Warrior then skates around the carpeted area, into the arcade, where Tony Tourettes is playing Tekken. Tony looks up, and sees Warrior. The two stare each other down briefly, then MISTER Warrior lets out a huge roar, which is returned by Tony. Both men then simultaneously pound their chests, and begin to engage in a Tekken battle while continuing to yell at nothing in particular. Meanwhile, CPA drags Denzel into the arcade with them, and lifts him overhead, then presses him onto a skeeball ramp! COLE Look at this, CPA looking to gain a pinfall on Denzel already! CPA grabs one of the skeeballs, and loads his hand with it, then drills the recovering Denzel with the GIGATON PUNCH~!!!!!11111 Cover... 1... 2... 3!!! COACH All right, CPA! COLE And we've got a fall! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MAN TO BEAT: CPA ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CPA gloats, until Sandman flies into the picture, hopping onto one of the round booths, then hopping into CPA with a dropkick! CPA stumbles back onto the floor, then Sandman lays roller skate stomps into his body as he lays on the ground. COACH Hey, Sandman's pretty good on those skates! Back to the rink, where the Burrough Boys all kind of stand out of the way at the wall. COLE And the Burrough Boys taking it easy over there right now! Cortez slugs it out with Sandman just outside the arcade, while CPA comes to and hammers away on Dr. Pigley. Vinny, Biff, and Dave work together on Colombian Heat, but Dr. Anderson comes to his aid (get it? lol), going to work on Dave. Heat fights his way back on Vinny and Biff, as Anderson makes his way over to help Pigley with CPA. The Love Docs execute a double slam on CPA! Bosley attempts to help his partner, but is met with right hands! The Docs then take off around the ramp, gaining speed, and floor Bosley with a double clothesline! COLE High-impact double clothesline! Meanwhile, J-MAX manages to climb onto the half wall, waiting on CPA, and hits him with a flying bodypress! 1... 2... 3!!! COLE And J-MAX with a fall on CPA! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Man to beat: J-MAX ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Burrough Boys are surrounding the foozball table as Luther and Waldo compete in a game. Meanwhile, Mr. Dick slides a Conquistador across the skate return counter into the back room, and follows him over. They slug it out, while Deadbeat Dave hammers away on J-MAX. The other Conquistador makes his way to the skate return booth shortly after. COLE I've just been informed that 5 minutes have passed in the match! Only 10 minutes remain! Denzel and Heat dive right into the Burrough Boys, which doesn't prove to be wise as the BB's quickly make it a 4-on-2 assault, with Mariano and Waldo hammering away on Denzel, and Luther and Quincy doubling up on Heat. Mariano and Waldo hold Denzel up against the lockers on the wall, while Luther sets up Heat for a battering ram, and Quincy gains speed on his skates and pushes the two towards Heat. However, Denzel manages to escape the grip, and Heat shoves Luther off into Mariano and Quincy! COLE The Burrough Boys had a big move set up there, but Heat and Denzel turned it around! Quincy makes another dash towards Heat, but he catches him with the momentum and shoves him into the other BB's! Heat makes his way over to Luther, and drags him into the women's bathroom, while Denzel works over Mariano. He drags Mariano to the concession stand, and they fight their way into the back. COLE Into the concession stands! Vinny and Biff work over J-MAX, scooping him up and dropping him across the half-wall! Vinny then makes his way to the concession stand, as Biff skates back up onto the carpet, then climbs onto the wall, and drops a leg across the back of the head of J-MAX! He then pulls himself to his feet, and drops a knee to the sternum for good measure, then covers... 1... 2... 3!!! COLE Look at Biff FLY off that wall! COACH ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Man to beat: Biff Atlas ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Biff celebrates, as we cut back to the concession stands to catch Denzel removing the slush puppy tank, and dumping the contents onto Vinny's head! VINNY AAAH! COLD! Vinny arches back and dances around in a circle as the icy beverage runs down his back. Seconds later, a familiar tune comes over the arena. Cut to 6:54 All the combatants (including MISTER Warrior and Tony Tourettes) as well as all the customers make their way to the rink and get in formation, then Denzel rolls into the scene front and center. The music hits, and everyone begins to dance. COLE Well, we thought we'd seen it all in the OAOAST, but this is a first! The Heartland title match has broken out in song and dance! The dancing continues, but once the lyrics kick in, Heat drills Biff with a PELE KICK~! and covers him... 1... 2... 3!!! COACH What a party pooper! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Man to beat: Colombian Heat ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The BB's pound on Heat, but the Love Docs quickly join in. The crowd moves over closer to the half-wall, where the Conquistadores climb onto the wall, and both jump on top of the seven-man pile! COLE Look at this! Vinny and Biff stand on the carpet on the other side of the half-wall, while Dave stands in front of the entrance door. Dave skates towards Vinny and Biff, picking up speed, and Vinny and Biff catch him, double-hiptossing him onto the pile of people! COACH Look at that teamwork! Sandman skates onto the rink and reaches over the wall, ramming Vinny and Biff's heads together, then climbs onto the wall, and does an ugly-looking backflip on top of the pile! COLE And Sandman with a moonsault attempt, tough to do with those skates on, but down goes the mass of people once again! As the people get up once again, Mr. Dick puts his arms around the shoulders of CPA and Bosley at the far end of the rink, and the two grab MD's head in a battering ram. The three men pick up their speed, charging into the group of combatants, and crash into everyone, as everyone falls to the ground! COLE Look at the carnage! DJ AX Five minutes left in the match! FIVE MINUTES! The mass of people start to come to their feet, and Heat makes a dash at Sandman...who pulls a defenseless skater in the way, causing Heat to collide into him! COACH COLE And Sandman just sacrificed one of these paying customers to dodge that attack from Heat! This is something we feared would happen! Sandman grabs the dazed Heat, and PLANTS him with a DDT onto the floor! COLE And a DDT right into the hardwood skating floor! Cover... 1... 2... 3!!! COACH Uh-oh, this could be the start of another reign of terror for Sandman! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Man to beat: Sandman9000 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Cortez attacks Sandman from behind, as the camera cuts to the skate return booth, from where a huge cloud of smoke emerges from the window. COACH What the hell's going on here? The cameraman fights through the smoke cloud to find Vinny, Dave, Tony, and the BB's sitting in a circle, indian-style, on the floor in the backroom where all the skates are kept after they're returned. COLE Well, those guys aren't going to win the title that way! COACH My boys are like "fuck this, let's go toke it up!" MD helps Sandman out, as the two double-team Cortez. They start to set up a double-team move, but J-MAX comes to his aid, hammering away on MD. DJ AX Three minutes to go in the match, THREE minutes! COLE And Sandman9000 is just three minutes away from becoming a two-time Heartland champion! Sandman skates up to the concession stand and grabs a Coke, swigging it down, then catches Pigley coming after him with a kneelift, and slams his face into the counter. Sandman attempts to skate over and hit Cortez with a tope over the half-wall, but Cortez moves and Sandman lands with a splat on the floor! Cortez then gains speed going around the rink, and Denzel sneaks up and shoves Sandman from behind, right into a SPEAR from Cortez! COACH COLE What a spear! Denzel and Cortez dive in, and CPA, Bosley, J-MAX, the Docs and Conquistadores all pile on top of Sandman! 1... 2... 3!!! COLE And Sandman was pinned in a dogpile! But who get credit? DJ AX It's the TWOOOOOOOO Minute Warning! The referees pull the bodies off the top of Sandman, and Denzel is revealed to have snuck in for the pin just before Cortez! COLE And Denzel is going to get the credit for the fall! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Man to beat: Denzel Spencer ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Cortez hammers Denzel, and the two begin to slug it out. Cortez gets the better of the exchange, then backs up and dashes towards Denzel, who drops to the ground, as Cortez hits the wall and flips over into the carpeted area! COLE And Denzel's going to go on the defensive here! The BB's, Vinny, and Dave are seen stumbling from the back. Vinny stumbles on his skates, and falls to the ground, as he and Mariano laugh uncontrollably. COACH Those guys are wasted! Seconds later, MISTER Warrior and Tony emerge from the back, arm-in-arm. Both guys let out a roar, which turns into rumbling laughter halfway through. DJ AX ONE MINUTE, contestants! COLE Less than a minute left in this one! Denzel skates onto the carpeted area, fending off various attacks. Sandman has removed one of the bars from the foozball table, and begins hammering the combatants going after Denzel. COACH Look, that's one of those things from the foozball table! See the little guys on there? COLE Sandman trying to get Denzel all for himself! DJ AX THIRTY SECONDS! Denzel boots Sandman in the gut, then lunges at him, but gets clotheslined by the bar. DJ AX FIFTEEN SECONDS! Sandman grabs Denzel and moves towards the concession stand. DJ AX TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! Sandman sends Denzel's head crashing into the glass case of arcade prizes! Denzel crumples to the ground, and Sandman covers... 1... DX ONE! 2... The horn blows as the referee slaps the ground a second time! COLE The match is over! COACH Sandman wins! COLE No, I don't think there was a three-count there! Sandman raises his arms in the air, but the referee waves it off, saying that time expired. COLE There it is! DJ AX Ladies and gentlemen, the match is over! The winner, and STILL OAOAST Heartland champion, DENZEL SPENCER! COACH What a travesty! A slow count by the referee! COLE Denzel Spencer retains his Heartland title in the Skate of Die match! Denzel is helped up by the referees, and walks through the exit with his belt. COACH Well, I'll tell you what. He may have been saved by the bell tonight, but there'll be another time for Sandman9000!

“The World is Mine” by David Guetta plays the Can-Am Assassins and LDC Moneygang to the ring. BUFFER This is a Survivor Series match. Introducing first, accompanied by LORELEI DECENZO…team captains SPENCER REIGER and COLIN MAGUIRE, JR… THE LDC MONEYGANG!! And their partners, FELIX STRUTTER and KEN PANTERA… THE CAN-AM ASSASSINS!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Self-appointed team captains, I might add. COACH I don’t see the Can-Am Assassins complaining. COLE You ought to call the OAOAST Hot Newzline more often. As the heels loosen in the ring, “Shine” by Collective Soul hits. BUFFER And their opponents! First, the reigning TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS OF THE WORLD and captains… CHARLIE MOSS, QUENTIN BENJAMIN… TEAM HEYROSS!!! And their partners… DEUCE DEUCE BIGELOW and JUMBO!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Red, white and blue pyro shoots off behind Team Heyross, Deuce and Jumbo as they pose. COLE Arguably the most decorated tag team in OAOAST history, Team Heyross enter tonight fresh off two successfully title defenses against the men opposite them, Deuce and Jumbo. COACH Lady luck’s been on their side recently, but she always finds a new favorite, Cole. It’s only a matter of time before we have new tag team champions. The pre-match gear is tossed aside and we’re ready for action. * DINGDINGDING * Reiger mocks Deuce’s weight at the start, pretending to be out of breath after one step. A wry smile on his face, Deuce calls for Reiger to lockup. They do and Reiger goes straight for the eyes, blinding Deuce momentarily. Reiger drives Deuce face-first into the boot of CMJ and then tags out. Irish uppercuts and leg strikes rock Deuce against the ropes before he’s sent for the ride, but CMJ is unable to hit THE CAMBRIDGE CURSE (Stun Gun) as he legs give out and Deuce lands on top! ONE! TWO! SAVE BY REIGER! COLE What a mistake that was. I can’t believe CMJ actually thought he could get Deuce up. COACH Obviously Deuce packed on a few extra pounds during Thanksgiving, otherwise CMJ would have gotten him up with ease. Jumbo tags in and hammers away on CMJ, then whips to the buckle for a corner avalanche splash! Reiger charges in, but Jumbo moves and splashes both men in the corner! COLE This is payback right here. You know Deuce and Jumbo haven’t forgotten how CMJ and Reiger beat them a few weeks ago on OAOAST Syndicated. Quentin Benjamin receives the tag and catches CMJ with a SPRINGBOARD CLOTHESLINE! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Benjamin wrings the arm and tags Moss, then executes a drop toehold while Moss delivers a leg drop off the ropes. The cover. ONE! TWO! NO! CMJ kicks out again. Although maybe CMJ wishes he hadn’t after Moss rams him into THE HEAD of Deuce! COACH Don’t say it, Cole. COLE Talk about using your head! COACH I just knew you couldn’t resist that cliché. Another head BUTT follows, and then a RUNNING POWERSLAM, but instead of going for the cover Deuce attempts a vertical diving head BUTT only to have CMJ move. COACH Now that’s NOT using your head. Reiger gets the tag again, but runs into a backdrop! Reiger begs off in the corner, a ploy to sucker the big man in, but Deuce blocks a kick and delivers an atomic drop! Reiger stumbles to the wrong corner and receives blows from all 3 men on the apron, and then a DROPKICK BY DEUCE! COLE What agility for a man that size! Deuce introduces Reiger to the turnbuckles of both neutral corners, but Reiger manages to reverse a whip and CMJ knees the Flaming Gigolo in the back! A tag is made and CMJ works Deuce over in the heel corner, stepping away when instructed so his teammates can get in their cheap shots. COLE Where’s the second official to breakup this nonsense? COACH Is it that time of the month, Cole? You’re awfully moody tonight. Sure enough, the outside official rushes over to put an end to the triple-teaming. Then for the first time tonight a member of the Can-Am Assassins sees ring action, as Felix Strutter tags in. A series of body shots follow before Strutter attempts a DOUBLE UNDERHOOK SUPLEX, but Deuce counters with a backdrop. Strutter tags Pantera and the strongman clubs Deuce across the back, and then slams him easily! COACH That’s power right there, baby boy. COLE You aren’t kidding. I’ve never seen anybody slam Deuce with such ease. In case anybody thought it was a fluke, Pantera executes a DOUBLE UNDERHOOK STALL SUPLEX! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! The Can-Am Assassins tag, but Pantera stays in to hold Deuce up for Strutter. COLE Come on, ref. You gotta get Pantera out of there. COACH Don’t worry about it. They have until the count of 5. Strutter makes his move as does Deuce and Pantera takes the brunt of a HIGH ROUNDHOUSE KICK! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Deuce PRESS SLAMS a stunned Felix Strutter, then tags Jumbo. Strutter spots the big fella headed his direction and tags CMJ, who goes toe to toe with Jumbo. CMJ gets the worse end of the exchange and ultimately finds himself in a BEARHUG! COLE We’re gonna have our first elimination at any moment. Reiger enters to lend his partner a hand but gets cut off by Deuce. COACH We’ve got all 4 men in the ring. Deuce shoots Reiger in for a HANDSPRING ELBOW, then whips him towards Jumbo who delivers a BIG BOOT. Jumbo returns the favor and Deuce levels CMJ with a SPINNING WHEEL KICK. COACH I don’t hear you crying about the officiating now, Cole. Deuce and Jumbo have been in the ring well over the allotted 5 seconds. COLE The referee must feel things aren’t too out of handle. And I’d have to agree. It’s organized chaos, not chaotic. Jumbo bounces off the ropes for the XL SPLASH~!!! The cover. But first the ref must get Deuce out of the ring, which allows Reiger to nail Jumbo with a TOP ROPE KNEEDROP! COLE No! Reiger places CMJ on top and exits. The count. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! High-fives all around in the CAA/LDCMG corner. Needless to say that isn’t the case on the other side. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 1st elimination: Jumbo eliminated by: Spencer Reiger (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COACH It’s 4 on 3, Cole. Strutter gets the tag and is immediately greeted by Benjamin. Benjamin fires Strutter into the ropes after a brief exchange, but Strutter counters Benjamin’s hip toss with a TRAPPED ARM BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Strutter slams Benjamin mid-ring and climbs to the top, only to be met by Benjamin who runs up the ropes to execute a RELEASE OVERHEAD BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX!!! COLE Oh, my! The cover. ONE! TWO! THR-- NO! Strutter kicks out and just barely. Team Heyross tag and they perform a cradle hip toss back suplex. Again the cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Moss brings Strutter to his feet and is raked across the eyes. Pantera receives the tag and charges in…to an arm drag! And a second! And a third! SUPERKICK catches Pantera off-guard, and Moss capitalizes with a GERMAN SUPLEX! The cover. ONE! TWO! NO, KICKOUT! Deuce tags in and hammers Pantera. Big head BUTT stuns both men briefly, then Deuce whips Pantera in for a dropkick. Like the tattoos on his head, Deuce is on fire. The Flaming Gigolo delivers a FALCON ARROW and then a TOP ROPE FLYING HEADBUTT… BUT NOBODY’S HOME! COACH More like “I’m out cold, Medina,” than Funky Cold, huh, Cole? Since it’s PPV, Pantera busts out THE APOLLON’S WHEEL~!!! “OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” COLE Another incredible show of strength by Ken Pantera. The cover. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! Reiger is quick to let Team Heyross know it’s 4 on 2 now. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 2nd elimination: Deuce Deuce Bigelow eliminated by: Ken Pantera (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COACH Team Heyross might as well forfeit, Cole. The odds are stacked against them. COLE Although I don’t like their chances, if anybody can pull this off it’s Team Heyross. Moss again catches Pantera off-guard, this time with a SCHOOL BOY! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Pantera knees Moss and tags Reiger, who gets taken down by a drop toehold. Moss floats on top to apply a side headlock, but Reiger shoves him off and a blind tag is made. Reiger leapfrogs Moss on the rebound, then gets undercut by Benjamin as Moss delivers the clothesline! COLE Double Goozle! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Benjamin stays on the offensive, taking to the air to hit a FLYING CROSSBODY…BUT REIGER ROLLS THROUGH AND HOOKS THE TIGHTS!! ONE! TWO! THR-- NO, KICKOUT! Both men pop to their feet, but it’s Reiger who strikes first connecting on a standing dropkick. Benjamin falls outside where’s he’s triple-teamed by the Can-Am Assassins and CMJ. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The outside official rushes over to restore order, but the damage has been done. Reiger tosses Benjamin back inside and performs his signature SLINGSHOT DOUBLE STOMP! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! COACH Somebody tell that idiot he’s better off living to fight another day. COLE I’ve told you before, there’s no quit in Team Heyross. If they go down they’re gonna do it swinging. Reiger signals for CMJ to head up top. COACH If they hit this it’s gonna be 4 on 1, Cole. “This” being THE SPIKE REIGER COUNTER, but Benjamin takes Reiger down and SLINGSHOTS him towards the corner, causing the LDCMG to collide! CMJ tumbles to the floor while Reiger stumbles back at Benjamin, who executes a VERTICAL SUPLEX INTO SITOUT POWERBOMB!!! COLE Orange Crush! The cover. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 3rd elimination: Spencer Reiger eliminated by: Quentin Benjamin (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lorelei throws her arms up in disgust, then proceeds to scold the Can-Am Assassins. COACH Looks like Lorelei is coaching up her team, Cole. Just as that’s said Lorelei SLAPS Strutter! COLE I don’t know about that. COACH Obviously Lorelei subscribes to the Bobby Knight method of coaching. Strutter gets in Lorelei’s face, but CMJ comes to her defense. An argument ensues and CMJ walks away with Lorelei and Reiger. STRUTTER COLE Is he leaving? COACH It appears so. The referee starts to count CMJ out. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 4th elimination: Colin Maguire, Jr. eliminated by: Count out ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE Some co-captain CMJ is. I can’t believe he took his ball and went home. COACH I’m at a loss myself. Maybe both teams weren’t as close as I thought. Moss brings Strutter in the hard way. Strutter calls for a time out but gets a kick to the sternum instead! Moss fires Strutter across for a corner clothesline, then climbs onto the middle rope and unloads. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN! Strutter drops to his knees, gets turned over and has his legs grapevine, but a clubbing forearm by Pantera breaks up the attempted Mossy Knoll. COLE The Can-Am Assassins dodged a bullet. Had the Mossy Knoll been applied it would’ve been 2 on 1. COACH At least try to hide your bias, Cole. You’re practically drooling at the prospect of Team Heyross being up 2-1. After Strutter rams Moss into the boot of Pantera, he tags out. Pantera keeps Moss in the corner for a series of shoulder thrusts, then executes a GORILLA PRESS SLAM! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Looking to squeeze the fight out of Moss, Pantera applies a BEARHUG. COACH Listen to Moss’s back snap, crackle and pop, Cole. Benjamin encourages the crowd to rally behind Moss, and it seems to work as Moss slips an arm inside, but Pantera dashes any hope of a comeback with a TRAPPED ARM BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Strutter receives the tag and executes a fall away slam, then steps out on the apron for a SPRINGBOARD HURRICANRANA…only to have Moss counter with an STO BACKBREAKER!! “OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” In a world of hurt Strutter does the Curly Shuffle, and then tags out. Moss evades a charge, sending Pantera crashing hard sternum-first into the buckle, then delivers a HALF-NELSON SUPLEX which is followed by a tag and TOP ROPE BULLDOG! The cover. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 5th elimination: Ken Pantera eliminated by: Quentin Benjamin (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE What turn of events. Team Heyross found themselves down 4-2. Now they’re up 2-1. Incredible! COACH Yeah, but CMJ was not counted out, not pinned. We could bring him back to even the odds. Right? RIGHT?!? COLE Listen to yourself. You’re in denial. Reality sets in on Strutter, evident by the look on his face. STRUTTER Strutter puffs his chest and asks Team Heyross if they want some, to which they nod and motion for him to come on in. But Strutter has a change of heart and leaves, pointing to his head walking up the aisle. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH Here’s a man who gets it, Cole. The odds are stacked against Felix so he’s gonna live to fight another day. COLE Who’s to say he can’t rally from being down 2-1? Team Heyross did and it was 4-2. Speaking of which, it’s funny how Strutter claimed Team Heyross were ducking him and Ken Pantera, yet he‘s the one running from a fight. The referee starts to count Strutter out… ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! …but Team Heyross catch up to him jawing with fans and drag his ass back to the ring. "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Strutter pleads for mercy, but eats a DOUBLE FLAPJACK and is put away with THE SUPER ROCKER DROPPER~!!!! Moss covers. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! COACH I think I’m gonna puke. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 6th elimination: Felix Strutter eliminated by: Charlie Moss (pinfall) SOLE SURVIVORS: Team Heyross ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ *DINGDINGDING* BUFFER Here are your winners and sole survivors… CHARLIE MOSS, QUENTIN BENJAMIN… TEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMM HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" “Shine” by Collective Soul plays as Team Heyross’ hands are raised in victory. COLE They’ll be talking about this one for years, Coach. Just a truly remarkable performance by Team Heyross to overcome a 4 on 2 deficit. COACH As much as it pains me, I gotta give Team Heyross their due. A lot of teams would’ve quit, maybe even should quit with those odds, but they kept fighting. I can’t wait to hear what the LDC Moneygang have to say about this. COLE You won’t have to wait long. They’re standing by with our broadcast colleague Tony Brannigan. We cut to the Enterprise’s private dressing room where CMJ and Spencer Reiger are dining on turkey legs. BRANNIGAN Spencer Reiger, CMJ, I gotta tell you, for two guys whose team just LOST you sure don’t seem too upset. CMJ (mouthful) It couldn’t happen to a bunch of nicer guys. REIGER More like a pair of TURKEYS if you ask me. I mean, some partners the Can-Am Assassins were. The whole concept of tonight’s show is teamwork. So why the hell did they stand on the apron with their thumbs up their ass while CMJ laid in on the floor in a world of hurt and I got spiked with the Orange Crush?!? Suddenly a lot of screaming and shouting is heard in the halls. Then the door kicks open and THE CAN-AM ASSASSINS enter. STRUTTER THERE YOU ARE, YOU SONS OF BITCHES! With that all hell breaks loose as the LDC Moneygang and Can-Am Assassins go at it backstage. OAOAST officials quick to rush in and separate the four. COLE Tony, be careful back there. We cut back to Sofa Central once the action cools. Cole and Coach both stunned. COACH I don’t know what else to say after that. We're taken to an exterior image of the Air Canada Centre COLE Folks, thank you for joining us on this November Reign, lots more matches coming up!

NO HOMO PREVIEW! Maggie Nerdly stands inside the ActionZone at OAOAST HQ in Pittsburgh (blah!), PA. MAGGIE What's up, ya'll? Its the It Girl on the Scene, Maggie Nerdly here to bring you the latest screenshots and preview of No Homo. I don't wanna waste any of your time and take away from this kick ass show, so lets cut right to the chase! LEON RODEZ ENTRANCE MAGGIE Am I gonna have fun whuppin his ass, or what! VINNY VALENTINE ENTRANCE LEON VS VINNY ~~~~ VINNY VALENTINE Overall: 73 Abilities: Dirty Pin, Taunt Theif ~~~~ ~~~~ LEON RODEZ Overall 99 Abilities: Dirty Pin, Evasive Dodge, Object specialist, Move thief, Kip up, Possum Pin, Ring Escape ~~~~ MAGGIE A 99 for Leon? Well, he sure ain't a 99 in bed, I'll tell ya that much! Aight, gang, that's all we got for today, stay tuned for more OAOAST No Homo 2010!

Oh shit, this match ain't even finished and its already awesome!!!

Soooooooo what's poppin ppl?

God of Thunder hits and the crowd buzzes with hatred. The entryway is lit by flashing yellow lights that hail the arrival of ThunderKid. The hero of Green Bay raises his arms in salute to his own greatness before he makes his way down the entrance ramp. BUFFER The following is a Untied States Title match scheduled for one fall with a time limit of sixty minutes. Now making his way to the ring, from Green Bay, Wisconsin, he is a former One and Only tag team champion and United States champion... THUNDERKIIIIIIIIIID! COLE There’s a happy man with The Green Bay Packers having beat The Lions on this Turkey day. TK enters the ring, and makes the classic belt motion to jeers from the audience. Hey girl Where's your drink? We goin' all get real drunk tonight Hey girl I got bud we can all get fucked up tonight (get fucked up tonight) By the end of the night Imma have you drunk and throwing up (hey! ) By the end of the night Imma have you so fucked up Paraidiso Girl’s Patron Tequila booms into the arena and is met with a massive ovation from the audience. Rising onto the side of the entrance stage is a bar setting complete with patrons, and a neon pink sign that says “ALIX’S!” On top of the bar counter, attired in white booty shorts, and a white tube top is Miss Speiza herself. She wows the audience and the bar flys with some dirty dancing. She then hops off the bar and blows a kiss to the camera, leading super imposed red lips to appear on the screen. BUFFER And hisopponent, first from Los Angeles, California…..she is the United States Champion…..ALIX MARIA SPEZIAAAAAAAAAAA! Alix meerily skips down the entrance ramp, high fiving the fans before she charges up the ring steps. She then flashes the peace sign Yes I copied last week’s intro. No time to write a new one I’m afraid. DING DING DING Although unsure of the quirky Alix, TK decides to match his strength against her’s with a lockup. There’s a moments struggle before TK inevitably wins out and pushes the champion into a corner. His hands finds her face and uncomfortably press against it. Alix, however, has an easy solution to this problem. She bites his fingers! TK howls in miserey and immediately lets go of Alix. Unfortunately she hounds him towards the center of the ring and acquires a headlock. COLE I’m used to biting in the bedroom and its only fun when you or your partner Deshaun have a safe word. The hold doesn’t last for very long, as TK manages to shove the Hollywood Bad Girl into the ropes. She bounces back only to have TK leapfrog her. This forces her to take another run off the ropes, and when she does, the former US champion again leap frogs her. Alix again must run the ropes. Her arrival towards TK sees another leap frog, but this time Alix is wise to it and sticks out her foot. This causes TK to land crotch first on her tennis shoes! Alix bounces up and down and claps happily before rolling TK into a pinfall… ONE! TWO! TK rolls himself out the pinfall. He quickly rolls to his feet, and sends an anger spurred lariat at Alix. But the sexy Latina dodges it by sliding behind TK. There she gives him an atomic wedige! COLE Painful. Memories. High School. In front of all the marching band. GET MY UNDERWEAR OUT THE TUBA! NO THE DRUM STICKS DON’T GO IN THAT HOLE! AHHHHHHHH! Alix takes a swat at TK with a leaping enziguri, but the still wedgied puglist ducks his head. Moving with great speed, her captures Alix’s bare legs and begins roll her over into a boston crab. “FIX YOUR PANTS! FIX YOUR PANTS! FIX YOUR PANTS!” the fans chant at TK. He ignores their pleas, and instead keeps his focus on torturing Alix with his painful submission! The hold seemingly exhausts Alix, and she pounds her hands against the mat in frustration. Despite the agony, Alix reaches for the ropes and eventually she reaches them. The fans cheer as TK is forced to relequnsh his hold. He pulls Alix to her feet, and sends her on a run into the turnbuckles. TK charges after her, but his arrival carries him directly into a raised tennis shoe from brunette babe. As he staggers away injured, she leaps onto the third rope and springboards backwards to catch him in the face with a dropkick. Alix giggles with delight as she attempts a pinfall…. ONE! TWO! ThunderKid gets his soulder off the canvas with time to spare. With much haste he heads to his feet and puts himself off the ropes. Alix greets his return…by doing the robot!??? Highly perplexed ThunderKid stops dead in his tracks. This is when Miss Robot, slaps him in the face and hits him with a leaping DDT! The referee quickly gets into position for another pinfall… ONE! TWO! ThunderKid kicksout! COACH Gotta love the way ThunderKid kicksout of pins. If the virgin mary’s unsoiled vagina could give birth to a second child it’d be ThunderKid’s kickout style. COLE Forgive him, God, he knows not what blasphemy he speaks! Both competitors head to their feet, but it’s the wearied ThunderKid getting in some heavy right hands. He the grabs onto Alix’s arm and attempts to whip her towards a corner. But Alix will have none of that and reverses the hold to send TK into the corner. The agile Green Bay native avoids a horrible crash by running up to the third rope. He then flies backwards and shoves Alix to the ground with a cross body block! The fans are none to pleased with that move, but TK certainly is as he attempts a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Alix pops out the pin. Getting to her feet proves to be a difficult task as TK smacks her in the face with a dropkick. She staggers backwards into the ring posts, giving the former US champion the opportunity to strike her with a corner splash! The shot lands with tremendous force, and she begins to teeter over. But TK keeps her upright in order to launch her to the opposite corner. He follows in after her, and when he nears he takes to skies with a second body splash. However, this time Alix is well prepared for his strike and jumps upwards to nail TK in the face with a rising knee! “YEAAAAAAAAAA!” COLE That looked painful, and I bet it felt painful! ThunderKid stumbles away from Alix, holding tightly to his weakened jaw bone. Alix taunts him by spanking her tush and inviting him to take a shot. Rather than be mesmerized by the glorious jiggling of her but, TK is annoyed and charges shoulder lowered. But Alix slides out the way, and TK is forced to ram shoulder first into the corner posts. The fans are dekighted, but TK is noticeably less so. As he uneasily steps to the center of the ring, the US champion climbs the turnbuckles. “Shout outs to my pilgrims on the Mayflower, eatin with them Indians and then shooting em in the back. We rockin wit u founding fathers in Los Angeles, screw them hatin’ ass niggas!” With that wonderful Thanksgiving message, The Hollywood Bad Girl departs the turnbuckles and strikes down TK with a tumbling lariat! As the audience cheers her aerial show, Alix scampers onto TK and goes for a pin… ONE! TWO! TK pops his shoulder off the canvas, saving himself from certain defeat. While he struggles to get himself off the canvas, Alix pushes herself off the ring ropes. But as she skates across the ring, TK manages to knock her over with an unexpected bicycle kick. Quickly he dives atop Alix for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Alix makes the kickout which pleases the sold out audience. COLE Look at the speed ThunderKid delivered that kick with, it totally caught Alix off guard. COACH And its gonna catch her team off guard at November Reign, I know that. TK leaves Alix behind and heads to the corner. He makes moves to the top rope, jawing back and forth with the audience as he does so. But before he can properly elevate himself, Alix dropkicks his leg from under him. Somewhat fortunately he is able to land in a precarious standing position on the ring apron. But he hasn’t time to get his bearings before Alix dropsaults him off the apron. “YEAAAAAAAA!” The audience gets even to cheer about when the Hollywood Bad Girl descends from the top rope and takes TK to the ground with a diving spear! COLE Alix risking life and limb with an amazing aerial attack! Alix picks TK up and throws him inside the squared circle. Alix follows him in, but is put on the defensive as he rises with a lariat. But she ducks behind it, and then PINCHES his BUTT. “YEOOOOOOWWWWWWWW!” “Soft, squishy, not to firm, lacks defined musculature, I’d give this BUTT a 4.7” she comments. Much to her surprise TK takes offense and wheels around to strike at her, but she drops him down to the canvas with a drop toe hold. She then grabs onto the ropes and shakes them like a wild woman to the pleasure of the fans. With the ropes bouncing behind her Alix runs forward and lands a leg drop across TK’s neck! A pinfall is made… ONE! TWO! TK throws his shoulder off the canvas. Giving him little time to rest, Alix grabs onto his arm and promptly hurls him into the corner. Before he as a moment to register his surroundings, Alix attacks him with a dropkick right to the face. Alix then returns to TK to drill him in the jaw with a diving elbow! The fans pop once again, and Alix makes another pinfall.. ONE! TWO! It’s a near fall as TK manages a last second kickout. He fights to his feet, where he meets an assault of chops aimed at his chest. Though these strikes sting mightily, they can’t prevent him from nailing Alix in her waifish stomach. He then grabs onto her with a front facelock. From there he brings her into the air, seeking a falcon arrow. But Alix is crafty and wise to his hold and uses her knees to strike her to freedom. Landing on her feet, she immediately rushes towards the ropes. Coming back she fires herself forward with a cross body block. But TK manages to turn that over into a powerslam. He hooks onto both her legs for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Alix lifts a shoulder off the canvas. “ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” While the fans sing her name, Alix is dragged upright by TK. He throws her forward into the ropes, and then sticks his leg out to catch her with a big boot. She topples over, crumbling into the canavs. TK gives her little time to catch her breath, as he latches onto her tanned legs. He then falls backwards and slingshots her into the nearby corner. She lands hard against the ring posts, and injured groans seep through her mouth. Within moments of hearing these wails, a blood thirsty ThunderKid runs to nail her back with a shoulder tackle! COACH That’s like getting hit by a raging bull. TK then grabs onto Alix’s waist and throws her backwards with a snap suplex. He then leaps to his feet, where his boots drive into Alix’s back with pinpoint percesion. As she wails her miserey, the former US champion pulls the current off the mat. He holds onto white booty shorts and pulls her back and forth to strike her lower back with forearms. Her bare back burns a bright red, a pleasing colour to ThunderKid. He happily puts himself off the ropes, and comes back to wack Alix in the back with a running boot. “BOOOOOOO!” the fans jeer in response to TK holding up his arms. He ignores their taunts and insults and attempts a pinfall on Alix…. ONE! TWO! Alix makes the kickout! “YEAAAAAAAAAAA!” COLE Judging by the look on TK’s face he wasn’t expecting that. Frustrated TK, grumbles to himself as he picks Alix off the ring apron. But the brunette beauty begins to fire right hands into his midsection , causing him pain and annoyance. In response, he takes his knee and rams it directly into her forehead. Alix falls over, landing between the second and third ropes where she gasps for air and strength. TK leaves her behind, and charges to the ropes. He rushes back at top speeds and jumps forward to crash into her back with raised knees. Alix screams in anguish as she topples backwards, falling lifelessly to the mat. TK drapes his arm across her neck for a crucial pinfall…. ONE! TWO! A kickout! “YEAAAAAAAAA!” TK’s anger comes through grit and grinding teeth. He hauls Alix up by her chocolate colored hair and beats on her back with clubbing forearms. He then runs to the ropes, hoping to be able to cut through her with a spear. But as soon as he lowers his body, Alix shoots forward and drags him downwards with a sunset flip! ONE! TWO! But TK rolls himself out the pinfall. He comes back to his feet, and drops Alix off her’s with a double leg take down. He attempts to switch her over into a sharpshooter, but Alix’s resiliency allows her to rocket upward and drag TK down for another pinfall. ONE! TWO! But once again, TK kicksout. COLE Two very close near falls here on the Thanksgiving HeldDOWN~! As both performers are on their feet, TK fires off a lariat at Alix. She manages to duck that attack, but TK whips around with a kick that catches her right in the jaw. Alix falls sideways, all semblance of life drained from her face. An eager ThunderKid drops on top of her in a pinfall effort… ONE! TWO! THR-ALIX KICKSOUT! The fans erupt with enthused cheers, as TK falls backwards and curses his ill luck. COLE ThunderKid no doubt thought he was about to be a two time United States champion. Still angered TK stands up and gruffly demands that Alix does the same. His patience fails poorly, and he has no choice but to bring Alix off the canvas himself. But as he does so, the California hottie begins pumping elbows into his lower abdomen. These strikes serve their purpose and brush him backwards. This allows Alix to rise upright and begin throwing forearms against TK’s face,. COLE Look at Alix go, bringing the fight right to ThunderKid! COACH Reject ain’t gonna approve of TK dropping another US Title match. Best friends, nothing, the R-Man doesn’t play when it comes to wins and losses. With TK dazed from her flurry of strikes, Alix is able to rush into the ropes. But when she returns, TK is able to stab her stomach with a sharp boot. Alix doubles over in agony and this permits him to ltrap her in a front facelock. “THUNDER BOLT DDT!” he bellows to boos. But boos quickly turn into cheers, as Alix rips her body from his clutches. TK tries to reclaim his hold, but Alix snaps her hands around his neck. Within seconds he’s flipped by a sommersault neckbreaker! COLE Confessions of a Kristaholic! “YEAAAAAAAA!” The pin is made… CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! REJECT SMASHES A CHAIR INTO ALIX’S BACK! DING DING DING COACH I told you, that boy don’t play when it comes to wins and losses. Reject smiles at his handiwork, and soon The Heavenly Rockers join him within the ring.. Together they stomp away at poor Alix, while ThunderKid recovers in the background. Alix tries to fight to her feet, but the vultures are too much to counter. However, help appears on the way, as D*LUX bursts through the doors and charges down the entrance ramp. “YEAAAAAAAAAAA!” D*LUX enters the ring and immediately take down the Heavenly Rockers with twin spears. A slightly recovered ThunderKid is nailed with the Hit Me Baby One More time! The fans are overjoyed with what they see. That is until Reject hits a Euology on Tyler! Things for from terrible to horrendous for D*LUX when Leon Rodez comes in to take a chair to Shayne’s knees. COLE Come on! The beatdown resumes for no more than a few seconds before Alfdogg is sprinting down the ring . He slides into the squared circle, popping up to avoid a weak lariat from Synth. He charges forward and attempts to lariat Reject out the ring. But he’s cut off by running tackle from Logan Mann. With the MACHO Macho Mann holding Alfdogg down, Reject and Synth begin smashing their boots into Alf’s skull. COLE The numbers game keeps favoring Team Leject! *BbwWbAhmotherfuckerLlIiiBbbEErRrAATtTeeyYyOUUurRrMmmMmMiIInNnDddDd!!* "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE What is this? What is this? This Bohemoth blazing a trail of fire down the ramp. Full of fury and venom he dives into the ring ready to take on all of Team Leject! Synth is the first to try and stand tall against the big man. His piddly punches do him no good, as Bo grabs onto his neck and throws him over the top rope! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Logan is shoved into a challenge by Reject, and is promptly punished by a LETHAL spinebuster from the monster. COLE A beast unleashed! That’s what Bo is! TK attempts to interject himself into the slaughter, but is KO’ed by a QUADRUPLE dropkick from Alf, Tyler, Shayne and Alix! COLE Now that’s team work! Leon and Reject wisely bail out the ring before they can fall victim to this hellish rampage. They each back up the entrance ramp, scowling at both Bo and their fallen teammates. COLE Its Bohemoth rounding out Team Alfix and they’re standing tall while Team Leject is lying down beat down! Team Alfix raises each other’s arm, and they celebrate with their newest member the Meterosexual Monster Bohemoth. FADE OUT

-OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT- We come to the OAOAST Arena Where Michael Cole and Johnathan Coachman sit at a desk decorated with various Thanksgiving props such as faux turkeys, corn crops, ,cornucopias, stuffing, sweet bread, and that cranberry crap I HATE. COLE Welcome one and all to the Thanksgiving HeldDOWN~! Its a special time here at the OAOAST, and we wish you and your's a happy Holiday season. Michael Cole joined with Johnathan Coachman just days before November Reign. We've got a Thanksgiving treat for you with two title matches! The tag team titles are on the line when Team Heyross meets with the LDC Moneygang, and we have a United States title contest in the mainevent, Alix against ThunderKid. But we kick things off with Christian Wright! "Clean shirt, new shoes and I don't know what I am gonna do. Silk suit, black tie, I don't need a reason why. They come runnin' just as fast as they can cause every girl is crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man." The crowd is certainly not thankful to see Christian Wright and let him know it as he appears on stage. He simply adjusts his collared white shirt, and frowns at the fans. Patting his trusted breifcase, he's joined by Lorelei DeCenzo. She hooks his arm and guides him down the entrance ramp. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of twenty minutes, now making his way to the ring accompanied by Lorelei DeCenzo....Now residing in Washington D.C... weighing in at approximately 8 and 1/3 BARS OF GOLD~! He represents THE ENTERPRISE and is "THE NATURAL"... CCHHRRRIIIIISSSTTIIIIIIAAAAANN... WWRRRIIIIIIIIIIGGHHHHTT!!!!! The announcement of Wright's name draws out more boos, as the man himself poses with arms wide on the ring apron. Lorelei stands to his side on the ring mat, applauding her charge and chastising anyone who doesn't do so. COACH Mikey, there's a man with a lot to be thankful for this holiday. He could finish out the year on an amazing unbeaten streak. BUFFER And his opponent... Makes Me Wonder plays and its groovy beats are joined by the choatic scream of girls across the ring. Sliding out onto stage in black denim jean jacket and shorts is Shayne Brave. He's joined by Maya Duncan-Blanchard, and the two do their part to fire up the already rowdy audience. BUFFER From Detroit, Michigan, being accompanied by Maya Duncan-Blanchard, weighing one hundred eighty three pounds, he is SHOWTIME SHAYNE BRAAAAAAAAAVE! "YEAAAAAAAAA!" Inside the ring, Shayne Brave walks from edge to edge, pointing at the crowd and getting them to cheer louder and louder. On the outside, Maya helps to continue to pump up the capacity crowd. COLE Shayne Brave has quite the test for him heading into November Reign. Let's see if he passes against the so called God Child. COACH The Centennial Man, the god child. The Natural! DING DING DING Wright employs and unusual strategy; he charges across the ring and spears Brave into the corner posts. Still taken by surprise, Brave is unable to halt Wright’s shoulders from savaging his thin midsection. After several blows land, The Natural ends the attack and attempts to whip Brave across the ring. But the boybander reveres the hold and its Wright who’s sent crashing into the ring posts. The Natural stumbles forward, wheezing from his lost breath. Brave gaves him little time to recover as he leaps forward and strikes down The Centennial Man with a leg lariat. “YEAH-UH!” Brave shouts to the sold out audience They respond, “LET’S GO SHAYNE! LET’S GO SHAYNE!” Pumped up by the audience, Brave makes a quick dash to the ropes. As he hits the cables, Wright finds his footing once more. This allows him to lift Brave into the air and violently slam him through the canvas with a Wright Off. Thrilled with his signature attack, Wright struts about the ring, holing his arms high into the sky. “CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS!” “SILENCE!” Wright bellows as he begins bringing Brave back to his feet. An irish whip sends Brave into the corner, and a leaping lariat timbers him to the canavs. Smirking in satisfaction, Wright exits the ring in order to grab hold of Brave’s leg. Ignoring the referee’s pleas for mercy, Wright happily slams Brave’s knee into the metal ring posts. COLE An unnecessary attack by Christian Wright. That should be a DQ. Wright contiues his poor sportsmanship when he rams a loafer into his foe’s head. While the referee checks for blood on Brave’s forehead, Wright reenters the ring. Unwelcome by the referee and the fans, Wright stalks a crawling Brave. Once he reaches him, he grabs onto the back of his denim jeans, and roughly yanks him upright. The Centennial Man wraps his arms around Shayne’s small waist, and then lefts him into the air. He delivers incredible pain to the cute boybander by ramming his knee into the ring posts. Shayne falls to the ground, leaving him defenseless in the stomps that Wright delivers to his knees. Quickly growing bored of stomping the life out his foe, Wright pulls him upright into a front facelock. But Shayne shows incredible resiliency, by hammering at CW’s ribs with powerful fists. This earns him his freedom, but no offense as Wright recovers to drop him with a dropkick to the knee. “I AM THE CENTENNIAL MAN!” Wright boasts to booing fans. COACH After this match, Mikey, its only 95 more wins to 100. COLE In honor of Thanksgiving, I'll be thankful for when he finally reaches that mark and just shuts up! Wright runs the ropes, and returns to drop an elbow onto Brave’s knees. Brave screams in pain, a sound that only puts a smile on Wright’s face. He then brings Brave off the canavs and irish whips him into the cables. When the teen idol returns, Wright flips him over with a snap powerslam. The cover ensues…. ONE! TWO! Brave fights out! Wright attempts a second pinfall… ONE! TWO! Kickout! And a third pinfall… ONE! TWO! Kickout! The frustration is written clear across Wright’s face as he brings his younger opponent to a standing position. He throws him into the cables once more, and when Brave returns he’s thrown several feet by a belly to belly suplex! COLE What a show of power from Christian Wright! COACH See, now even you’re impressed by The Centennial Man. Wright hollers at Brave to rise. Although slowly, Brave comes off the canvas. He’s immediately struck by a mixture of kicks to his sore knee and European uppercuts. This should spell doom for Brave, but the handsome fighter begins taking aim at CW with powerful right hands! The fans root him on, as he leaves a dazed Wright to head to the ropes. Coming back to The Natural, Brave springs forward with a cross body block and topples Wright over! A count is made… ONE! TWO! Wright narrowly escapes the pinfall! He quickly springs to his feet, making a hurried attempt to regain the upperhand. But Brave counters him with a gorgeous sitout hip toss! “SHAYNE’S A HOTTIE! SHAYNE’S A HOTTIE!” the girls in the arena chant. Although dazed Wright comes back to his feet under his own power. But he’s once again thrown to the canvas thanks to a hurricanrana from Shayne! The referee counts the resulting pinfall… ONE! TWO! Wright kicksout once more, which earns relieved sighs from Lorelei. “BOOOOOOOOOO!” Both competitors return to their vertical bases. Shayne attempts to draw first blood with a spinning back fist. But Wright ducks bellow the move and attempts to move behind Shayne. But that effort meets horrible agony as Shayne tags his jaw with a deadly superkick! COLE He got him there, Coach! Showtime strikes again! As the fans explode with delight, Shayne makes another pinfall effort…. ONE! TWO! Wright gets his foot on the ropes, deflating the capacity crowd. COLE The OAOAST Marks thought the winning streak was snapped at five, but CW remains alive. Brave starts to pull Wright towards a vertical base. However a desperate CW resorts to cheap shots and slams his fist into Shayne’s unmentionables! “BOOOOOOO!” the audience hisses, while an exhausted Wright stumbles backwards. Strangley enough he begins motioning towards the entrance ramp. COLE Is he signaling for someone? The Moneygang! “BOOOOOOO!” the jeers aren’t for The Moneygang but rather for The Heavenly Rockers, who begin rushing to ringside. COLE Now this isn’t right! This violates the holiday spirit! Its akin to rape! They're raping Thanksgiving! Lorelei welcomes The Enterprise’s favorite band with a warm applause. Shayne, however, isn’t so pleased and is forced to keep an eye on the duo as he trades punches with CW. “TONE DEAF BASTARDS! TONE DEAF BASTARDS! TONE DEAF BASTARDS!” the audience sings to The Rockers. Wright throws Shayne into the ropes and charges after him to stun him with a lariat. But the teen scream jumps forward and takes Wright on a dizzying ride with a tornado DDT! COLE VINTAGE Shayne Brave “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Brave kips up, only to see Logan distracting the referee with one of his famous temper tantrums. Behind him, Shayne fails to notice that Synth has passed Wright a pair of drumsticks.. The Natural does well to conceal them, and they remain hidden as Shayne turns around to focus back on Wright. But all that changes, when Wright jumps up and jams them into Brave’s eyes! COLE No! No, he can’t do that!” “He just did!” Lorelei chuckles in response. The Natural wraps Shayne up in a school boy. Mann now lets the referee go free, and he returns to count the pin…. ONE! TWO! THREE! “BOOOOOOOOOOO!” the fans rain down jeers, as The Rockers smile to each other over their misdeeds. BUFFER YOUR WINNER AS A RESULT OF A PINFALL….CHRISTIAN WRIGHT! Lorelei beams with the smile of a proud parent as she enters the ring and passes the micophone to CW. WRIGHT From this day forth, I defiantely vow... no man, woman nor beast shall commit thine self to defeat! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COACH The Centennial Man comes through! Alright! Only 93 more victories to go! COLE 93 more tainted victories, you mean. Wright has to be pretty thankful for The Heavenly Rockers this turkey day.

The FOTRESS OF NERDLYTUDE is where we find Melody Nerdly. The geek-chic lass is situated inside the family kitchen which has been dolled up to look a little bit like a messy heap of food and candy, and a little bit more like a news set. Just a little bit more. MELODY Howdy, ya'll! Its that time of year again! The time where millions of fanboys and fangirls flock to gamefaqs message board and debate every piddly little detail about the newest OAOAST game....No Homo 2010! CANNED APPLAUSE! MELODY That's right, everyone. No Homo 2010! Be prepared to bitch about Landon's Go 2 Sleep taking to long to execute, Sandman wearing the wrong color sweatpants, Leon not having the 450 splash in his moveset, and Christian Wright's agility being rated way to highly! This game features over 60 OAOAST Stars and legends, including this cowgirl right here! There are over 40 different match combinations, a road to Anglemania career featuring stories for Krista, Moneymaker, PRL, Reject, Morgan, and Bohemoth! Plus we've got create an entrance, create a superstar, create a taunt, and create a storyline for all of us who like writing gay fanfics about D*LUX! Right now lets get to some pictures and profiles! TODD CORTEZ VS THEODORE MONEYMAKER THEODORE MONEYMAKER'S ENTRANCE TODD CORTEZ ABILITIES: Hard Punch, Kip Up Overall: 85 THEODORE MONEYMAKER ABILITIES: Object specialist, dirty pin, referee shield, ring escape, super taunt, move theif Overall: 98 MELODY That's all for today! But we'll have a lot more in these coming weeks! FADE OUT

Backstage, many from the OAOAST roster are seen helping themselves to Thanksgiving fixings provided by the higher-ups, when the Burrough Boys walk into the room, and spot Vinny Valentine. WALDO Vinny mama got one big titty and one little titty, and dey call da bitch Biggie Smalls! VINNY Wow, that was original! I didn't know the OAOAST hired Dave Chappelle! MARIANO Hope y'all left me some candied yams and collar greens! VINNY Well, come here, let me show you what we got. Vinny leads the BBs over to Biff, who is trying to hold back laughter. Vinny raises up the lid on one of the trays. VINNY Right here, we got the turkey. Vinny lifts up another lid. VINNY Some nice ham, real juicy, make sure you try that. And under this one... Vinny lifts up the third lid, and Tony Tourettes pops his head out of a hole in the table and lets out a big roar, causing the BB's to jump about two feet back from the table. Vinny and Biff burst out in laughter. BIFF That was the Tony Surprise! Deadbeat Dave walks up with a small tray of his own. DAVE What about this, guys? I just finished making this cornish hen with chestnut dressing! Vinny, Biff, Tony, and the BB's look at each other, then back at Dave suspiciously. DAVE Would you believe a pigeon stuffed with SPAM? The other continue their stare. DAVE ...would you believe a rat stuffed with cough drops? TONY ...are they cherry-flavored? LUTHER Naw, but this is! Tony then takes a cherry pie to the face from Luther. DAVE Oh, this must be the obligatory Thanksgiving night food fight. VINNY Yeah, this is it. DAVE Count me in! Vinny takes a blueberry pie to the face from Dave. Jumbo holds onto a turkey at the end of a table, while the Burrough Boys each grab one of Tony's limbs, and slide him across the table, with Tony's head going straight into the cavity of the turkey! Dave and Biff cringe upon this sight, then Waldo takes a bite of sweet potato pie before shoving it into Biff's face, and Dave gets a peanut butter pie from Quincy. The madness continues as we go to commercial.

BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is for the ONE & ONLY WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP! “The World is Mine” by David Guetta hits and Lorelei DeCenzo leads her charges through the curtain flanked by green and gold spotlights. BUFFER Introducing first, the challengers representing THE ENTERPRISE and accompanied by LORELEI DECENZO… at a total combine weight of 430 pounds, COLIN MAGUIRE, JR. and SPENCER REIGER… THE L-D-C MMMOOOONNEYGANG!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Lorelei removes her men’s hoodies and the LDC Moneygang take a moment to laugh at all the little people. COLE (sarcastically) What great champions those guys would make. COACH I know, right? Definitely much better than Team Heyross. Speaking of whom, “Shine” by Collective Soul cues. BUFFER Their opponents and CHAMPIONS… total combined weight 485 pounds… CHARLIE MOSS, QUENTIN BENJAMIN... TEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMM HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Team Heyross pose as red, white and blue pyro blasts in the background. COLE Captains of their Survivor Series team...and not self-appointed like the LDC Moneygang... this Sunday night, Charlie Moss and Quentin Benjamin look to make it 2 in a row. Last week they successfully defended their tag titles, albeit in less than desirable circumstances thanks to the men they face tonight. COACH Are you kidding me? Team Heyross provoked the LDC Moneygang. I mean who had everything to lose and nothing to gain? Team Heyross! So they devised a plan to cause a friction between the LDC Moneygang and Can-Am Assassins in case they got caught in trouble during the match, but it backfired. It only bought their opponents together. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" THE CAN-AM ASSASSINS make a surprise visit ringside taking a seat in the LDCMG corner, much to their surprise. COLE This can’t bode well for Team Heyross. COACH What did I tell you, Cole -- they’re closer than ever. You don’t see that kind of comradely between Team Heyross, Deuce and Jumbo. Strutter gives Reiger a big thumbs up as CMJ and Quentin Benjamin step inside. * DINGDINGDING * Both men circle around before they lockup, only for CMJ to suddenly break and deliver multiple leg strikes. Irish uppercut rocks Benjamin back into the corner where he’s subjected to more. Benjamin turns the tables and CMJ gets a taste of his own medicine. CMJ is then whipped off, but a blind tag is made, so after a hip toss Benjamin is floored by a Spencer Reiger standing dropkick! COACH Nobody delivers a dropkick quite like Spencer Reiger. COLE I’d have to agree with that. It’s very similar to how Ricky Steamboat perfected the arm drag. COACH Only a dropkick hurts a heck of a lot more than an arm drag. Reiger lays the boots to Benjamin, then rams him into the buckle. A series of knife-edge chops follow and so to does a whip to the far corner, but Benjamin floats over the top and SCHOOL BOY‘S Reiger! ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Big right hand stuns Reiger and Team Heyross tag. They shoot Reiger in for a double hip toss but hold on to perform a DOUBLE BACK SUPLEX! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Reiger reverses a whip and CMJ nails Moss with a knee to the back! COLE What a cheap shot that was. CMJ receives the tag and unloads on Moss, Irish uppercut after Irish uppercut. Then he goes from more Irish more to another, the Irish whip to be exact, but Moss reverses and delivers an OVERHEAD BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX! Moss smartly tags out in favor of the fresher man, Quentin Benjamin. SPINNING WHEEL KICK connects and Benjamin makes the cover. ONE! TWO! NO! Benjamin moves and Reiger accidentally drops a knee on CMJ! STRUTTER Dropkick sends Reiger flying outside. Benjamin then heads up top as Moss hoists CMJ onto his shoulders. LORELEI COACH Somebody do something! The Can-Am Assassins spring into action. Strutter distracts the ref while KEN PANTERA shoves Benjamin down onto the guardrail below! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh, come on! COACH Say what you will, Cole, but nobody can call the Can-Am Assassins liars. They promised to have the LDC Moneygang’s backs and they did just that. "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Lorelei and the Can-Am Assassins retreat to the other side as DEUCE DEUCE BIGELOW and JUMBO arrive ringside. COLE Speaking of having people’s backs, Coach, look who’s here. COACH Obviously we ran out of food, or these guys would still be in catering. Reiger gets the tag and rolls Benjamin back in, hitting a SLINGSHOT DOUBLE STOMP before making the cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Like Benjamin did earlier, Reiger knocks him outside with a dropkick. And like the season pro that he is, Reiger baits Moss in while CMJ works over Benjamin on the arena floor. The ref forced to restrain Moss and the team of Deuce/Jumbo. COACH Before you get on your soapbox about the need for 2 referees for tag matches, let me remind you there will be 2 officials ringside for all Survivor Series matches at November Reiger. CMJ tosses Benjamin back in and Reiger delivers a measured knee drop, then tags out. And CMJ goes right back to work with his patent Irish uppercuts, rocking Benjamin in the corner. HARVARDPLEX plants Benjamin smack in the middle of the ring. The cover. ONE! TWO! THR-- NO, KICKOUT!! CMJ slaps the mat in frustration, then stalks Benjamin. COLE D-Street Cutter on the way? Cole’s guess is correct, but Benjamin shoves CMJ off and hits a desperation SUPERKICK! COACH That one nearly took Colin’s head off, Cole. COLE Team Heyross needed that badly, because CMJ and Reiger were in total control of the match. Moss rallies the crowd behind Benjamin who begins to stir around the same time CMJ does. Fortunately for the champs, the kick dropped CMJ near their corner, meaning he’s got a longer way to go. CMJ gives up his quest for the tag as Benjamin gets there first! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Moss comes in a house afire, whipping CMJ into the ropes for a BAAAAACK body drop, and then catching Reiger on the way in with a dropkick. Following a pair of slams Moss delivers a DOUBLE COCONUT! COLE Lorelei DeCenzo’s men are in real trouble here. Reiger falls to the floor as CMJ stumbles into a BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Moss stays right on the offensive and places CMJ in THE MOSSY KNOLL~!!! COLE We could have a submission at any moment. COACH Maybe if Moss was in the hold. There’s no quit in CMJ. Lori hops on the apron for a word with the official, allowing Reiger to sneak in and nail Moss with a pair of BRASS KNUCKS!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Reiger places CMJ on top, then celebrates outside with the Can-Am Assassins. COLE No, damn it! COACH (laughs) We’re gonna have new champions, Cole. Lori jumps down from the apron into the arms of Reiger and the two embrace. Meanwhile, Felix Strutter leaps onto the apron. COACH What the heck? COLE Look up top. We pan to a wide shot as DEUCE DEUCE BIGELOW delivers a TOP ROPE HEADBUTT! COLE Funky Cold Medina! COACH No! Deuce places Moss on top! The count. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! * DINGDINGDING * Reiger grabs the tag titles and holds them up in the air…only to have them snatch away by the referee and awarded to Team Heyross. REIGER BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of the match… and STILL your One & Only World Tag Team Champions… CHARLIE MOSS, QUENTIN BENJAMIN... TEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMM HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" CUE: “Shine” by Collective Soul Reiger is tripped by the ropes as he enters the ring to argue with the official, disbelief on his and Lori’s face. Team Heyross, meanwhile, celebrate with Deuce and Jumbo. COACH This is awful, Cole. COLE I say it’s poetic justice. Reiger turns his anger towards the Can-Am Assassins and receives a shrug from Strutter. COLE We got problems here. COACH No, we don’t. The CAA leave Reiger and company in the ring. COLE What about that? COACH The match is over, idiot. There’s no point in sticking around. Quit trying to start trouble. COLE In any event, Team Heyross once again defended their tag titles. What a team they are and what a treat it will be to see them perform at November Reign. More after this, folks. COMMERCIAL

THE THANKSGIVING WEEKEND TRADITION NOVEMBER REIGN THIS SUNDAY NIGHT LIVE ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW Survivor Series Sweet Sixteen Match Cucaracha Internacional (Landon Maddix and Nathaniel Black; James Blonde and Faqu) and All The Queen's Men (Mardi Gras Hellfire Club; Last Kings Of Scotland) vs. Citizen Soldiers, Christ Air Express, Orange County Cobras and Los Diablos De Fuego In two other Survivor Series Matches... Can-Am Assassins & LDC Moneygang vs. Team Heyross, Deuce Deuce Bigelow & Jumbo TEAM ALFIX (Alfdogg, Alix, D*LUX, and ???) vs. TEAM LEJECT (Leon Rodez, Reject, ThunderKid, The Heavenly Rockers) PLUS... Heartland Title extravaganza featuring... Denzel Spencer © Sandman9000 Mr. Dick J-MAX Biff Atlas CPA Bosley Love Doctors Todd Cortez Conquistadores Colombian Heat Vinny Valentine Deadbeat Dave Burrough Boys AND MUCH MORE!

Cut backstage, where TK and Reject are all smiles as they make their way into the arena along with the rest of the DA. They're stopped by Josh Matthews. JOSH Reject, last week you guys joined up with your November Reign partners, the Heavenly Rockers, in a heinous assault on Alix, Alfdogg, and D*LUX. Are you concerned at all about any retribution tonight, and who their fifth partner might be? REJECT Retribution? Who's gonna have the nerve to come get some of this? Reject holds his arms out, referencing the DA as a whole. REJECT Did you see what we did to those four last week? You can add any one individual you want, it won't change the result. TK That's right, Josh, we've got no worries. No matter who they add as their partner, it doesn't matter! We're like a team full of Parker Lewises, 'cause we can't lose. REJECT Exactly. Let's go, guys. Reject and the DA walk off as Josh looks on. LATER TONIGHT TAG TEAM TITLES ON THE LINE TEAM HEYROSS VS THE LDC MONEYGANG TONIGHT MAINEVENT UNITED STATES TITLE ALIX MARIA SPEZIA VS THUNDERKID THE MAINEVENT COMMERCIAL

OAOAST Syndicated! With JESSE VENTURA TONY SCHIAVONE LEAD CORESPONDENT TONY BRANNIGAN SIDEKICK MAYA DUNCAN-BLANCHARD AND HOST ALIX MARIA SPEZIA Brought to you by American Express Alix kicked off the show with her monolouge, some highlights: "So recently the city of Los Angeles has jailed a guy for using his house as a place for homeless people to seek shelter. In other news its been announced that LA will now be going by the name "Home of the most evil bastards on earth." "In other news Michael Jackson's doctor seeing patients despite investigation of homocide, these patients have a very rare disease called "are you idiots fucking stupid-itis, a disease who's earliest known case is George W.Bush" Tony Brannigan conducted a podium interview with the Can-Am Assassins, who chewed out the LDC Moneygang for interfering in their recent tag title bout against Team Heyross. This prompted a response by the LDC Moneygang, with Spencer Reiger claiming his emotions got the better of him as he could no longer sit and watch Team Heyross “cheat like politicians on their wives. Our good intentions resulted in bad consequences, but we kept out word…we had your backs.” After a moment of silence Strutter looked the LDC Moneygang in the eyes and stated, “That’s deep, man. It hit me right there, in the heart. And you’re right, you had our backs. You supported us in an arena full of haters that night. Ken and I would like to return the favor this coming week as you guys go for the gold on HeldDOWN~! Put ’er there, homie.” The segment closed with Strutter giving Reiger a fist bump, and Reiger looking into the camera to say, "BTW, we're the team captains. ***ThunderKid Vs Tyler Bryant**** Tyler got the better of the early exchanges with kicks and some well placed slams. TK fought his way back into the match using elbows and well placed strikes. He then took over the contest, pummeling Tyler with powerful blows. But a missed lariat, spelled doom as it allowed Tyler to get back on the offense. Things were evenly matched at that point, until Tyler reversed a pinfall into a hurricanrana for a surprise pinfall! Winner: Tyler Bryant, via pinfall. Post match did not fare so well for Tyler Bryant, as TK became a sore loser and nailed the D*LUX member with a Thunderbolt DDT! Gotta keep that heat, my nigs. THIS WEEK ON A SPECIAL THANKSGIVING HeldDOWN~! TAG TEAM TITLES: TEAM HEYROSS VS LDC MONEYGANG US TITLE: ALIX MARIA SPEZIA VS THUNDERKID THURSDAY! We cut inside an empty roller skating rink, where Josh Matthews is sitting on a bench with Denzel Spencer. Josh asks Denzel to explain the upcoming match at November Reign for the fans, and Denzel explains that the match is called a "Skate or Die" match, and the match would take place inside this roll arena, with all participants competing while wearing roller skates. He explains as he skates alongside Josh on the rink that the match will last 20 minutes, with pins counting throughout, and the last combatant to score a pin will walk out the champion. So just like the Sunday Detention match from 2006, except it's in a roller rink on roller skates. The OAOAST Quote of the Week A new feature to the show aired titled "Eat like the Superstars," where OAOAST talent share their favorite receipes. This week it was how to cook a delicious turkey dinner with Mr. Dick and Malaysia. "Now, the first thing you gotta do is buy a turkey. Unlike pleasing a woman, size doesn't matter so any bird will do. Next you wanna get your turkey injector and marinate that sumbitch with special flavor." With that Mr. Dick dropped trou and reimagined the famous pie scene from American Pie. "Hey, you can't do that. You're gonna get us thrown off the air!" a producer shouted. The show's logo appeared on-screen as the director immediately cut away, though audio of Mr. Dick pounding the turkey could still be heard. "MMM-MMM, UNH! Once finished pop that bird in the oven, set it to about 325° and in a few hours you'll have one delicious turkey." ***Megan Skye and Queen Esther -VS- Melody Nerdly and Molly Nerdly*** Queen Esther came to the ring decked out in her luxurious velvet tracksuit, ready to fight. If she really had to. So long as she didn't have to, she was perfectly fine with standing on the outside and observing. So Megan contested virtually the entire match by herself against both of the nerdiest Nerdly sisters. Megan held her own fairly well, using her kickboxing background to fend off her opponents. After cutting off Molly, Megan eventually got confident enough to tag in Esther. The Queen delivered a grand total of two stomps before tagging back out and soaking in the feeling of being in battle. Way to go. Megan could only hold of Molly for so long before she escaped and tagged in Melody. A big "wacky comeback" from Melody was stopped by a roundhouse to the back of the head. However, Megan set up for the Tornado DDT and was countered, Melody hitting the SHORYUKEN~! Queen Esther reached up and tagged herself in, trying to surprise Melody with a rollup. She only scored two and was then in trouble. 'Surrounded', Esther turned away from Molly and was pinned, after ONE Melody Tomahawk Chop to the head renderred her powerless to kickout. Needless to say, Megan didn't look too impressed. Winners: Melody Nerdly and Molly Nerdly, via pinfall No sympathy from her partner, Queen Esther wailed in pain and had to be helped to the back, such was the DOOM she had just suffered.

In the mainevent.....US TITLE: ALIX MARIA SPEZIA VS THUNDERKID

Lemme get all the old shows posted there first, and then I think we should start our move. Man, we gotta turn off flood control at that board its fucking up my show posting!

Christian Wright Vs Shayne Brave!

That's a Tuesday by the way. What will it be, children?

I wanted a Midwest-sounding name for when Alf won it for the first time (to go along the lines of Puerto Rican/Italian title). I was deciding between Heartland, Great Lakes, and another one, maybe Midwest States or something like that. I consulted Hoff on it, and we both agreed on Heartland. It's just stuck since then. Finally! An explanation after all these years! Gateway to the west title, would've been cool to for those STL cats. I totally forgot the belt was once named the Puerto Rican title, and I only slightly remember the Italian title oh yeah, an NR match TEAM ALFIX (Alfdogg, Alix, D*LUX, and ???) -Vs- TEAM LEJECT (Leon Rodez, Reject, ThunderKid, The Heavenly Rockers,)

Only missing some stuff from Alf, and we're golden

-OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT- We come to the OAOAST Arena Where Michael Cole and Johnathan Coachman sit at a desk decorated with various Thanksgiving props such as faux turkeys, corn crops, and cornocupias. COLE Michael Cole and Johnathan Coachman here tonight with you on HeldDOWN~! the number one rated show on Cable TV. Tonight is an explosive night with Alfdogg teaming up with United States champion Alix Maria Spezia against world champion Reject and former United States champion ThunderKid. And lets not forget or tag title contest with The Can Am Asssasins making their mark against champion Team Heyross! But right now we kick things off with a six man contest! "HOLD UP! WAIT A MINUTE! PUT A LITTLE LOVE IN IT!" The rocking riffs of Family Force 5’s "Love Addict" boom into the arena. Multicolored spotlights trace a psychedelic path across the entry way, as the numerous video monitors flash with the steamy images of The Love Doctors. Unfortunately, it's Biff Atlas who walks through the entrance, to a loud GROAN. Luckily The Love Doctors themselves are not far behind and resuscitate the hearts of the female fans by performing their strip-tease routine. BUFFER The following contest of OAOAST HeldDOWN~! is a six-man tag team match, set for one fall. On the way to the ring... first, from Venice Beach, California. Weighing two hundred, twenty pounds... BBIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFF... AAAAATTLLLLLAAAAAASSSS!! And his tag team partners hail from Chicago, Illinois. DR. STEVEN PIGLEY and DR. MAX ANDERSON... THE LLOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVEEEEEE DDOOOOCCTTOOOORRRRRSSSSSS!!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" The de-labcoated Love Doctors slide into the ring and whip the crowd into a frenzy, as Biff is given some almost sympathetic slaps on the back from the fans. COLE Six man tag team actions, with The Doctors Of Love and the would-be superhero! COACH Only in the OAOAST. Unfortunately, I work for the OAOAST. So this is not a good thing. "Clean shirt, new shoes and I don't know what I am gonna do. Silk suit, black tie, I don't need a reason why. They come runnin' just as fast as they can cause every girl is crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man." Boos ring out for the arrival of the opponents, practically oozing "business". The smirking face of Christian Wright appears first, marching in front of his back-up for the night. Both puffing away on big expensive cigars and wearing blazers and suit pants, CPA and Detective Bosley look about as cool as back-up can look. BUFFER And introducing, their opponents. First, from Miami, Florida... the OAOAST's resident V.I.C.E squad... DETECTIVE TTTAAAANNGGOOOO BBOOOSSSSSLLLEEEEEYYY... and CHRISTOPHER PATRICK ALLEN, C... P... A!!!! And their tag team partner. Now residing in Washington D.C... weighing in at approximately 8 and 1/3 BARS OF GOLD~! He represents THE ENTERPRISE and is "THE NATURAL"... CCHHRRRIIIIISSSTTIIIIIIAAAAANN... WWRRRIIIIIIIIIIGGHHHHTT!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Wright walks ahead of his cackling buddies, briefcase in hand and adjusting his collar. He places the briefcase under his corner and begins to unbutton his shirt, while CPA and Bosley are busy stubbing out their cigars. COLE Christian Wright of the Enterprise, teaming tonight with two men who were of course once alligned with The Enterprise, CPA and Tango Bosley. Nowadays, class themselves as 'freelancers'. But still on some good terms with Moneymaker, or at least Moneymaker's money, and back teaming with Christian Wright tonight. COACH And what a team! V.I.C.E, always rolling hard, rolling real-deal. And CDub, on the big win streak! This is some money stuff here, for real. Stripped off and ready to go, CW enters the ring with CPA and Bosley taking up their place on the apron. COACH Hot damn look at the Centennial Man! Even in a ring with male strippers he still shines the hottest...no homo. *DINGDINGDING* Dr. Pigley starts out with Wright, a rematch from last week. And the Doctor gets the crowd clapping, which doesn't sit well with Wright. He commands them to quiet down as he enters a lock-up. Side headlock quietens down Pigley, Wright taking it to the mat. 1... 2... Pigley throws his shoulder up and quickly fights back to his feet. Elbowing CW in the gut, Pigley manages to get free and shoves Wright off into the ropes, only to get knocked down with a shoulder tackle. Wright makes the "money fingers" gesture to the crowd, to boos, then hits the ropes again. Dropdown by Pigley and then a leapfrog keeps Wright on the move, before getting caught with a hiptoss! "YYEEEEAAAAAAHHHH!" Wringing the arm, Pigley tags in Dr. Anderson, who comes in off the top with a double axe to the arm. Anderson quickly wrings the arm out and brings Pigley back in to get a SECOND OPINION!~ COLE You can't fault the teamwork of The Love Doctors, OAOAST veterans of about 5 and a half years. A knee to the gut breaks up Pigley's armbar though and a tag is made to Detective Bosley. The brash musclehead rushes right into an armdrag though and the Docs tag in. A double irish whip sends Bosley off, setting him up for a double inverted atomic drop. The Love Doctors then back off the ropes... BOSLEY COME ON, IS THAT THE BEST YOU'VE GOT!? IS THAT ALL YOU'VE GO -UGH-OOF! ...and blast Bosley with a double dropkick! Cover by Max... 1... 2... Kickout! Arm wrung again, a quick tag is made, this time to Biff! Stepping into the ring the mighty meathead clubs Bosley across the arm. Biff then starts clubbing Bosley in the chest with overhand forearms, slowly backing him across the ring. COLE Look at Biff go! Way to go Biff! With Bosley seemingly worn down to a stop Biff turns on his heels and runs off the ropes. Bosley isn't as beaten down as he's making out though and chases after Biff, elbowing him in the face just as he connects with the ropes! Bosley waits for Biff to stagger off the ropes, then wows everyone with a jump spinning back kick to knock Biff down! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH How about looking at the agility!? My man Bos got ups! COLE This crowd didn't appreciate it much. It really seems like they're warming to Biff. There's something strangely endearing and likeable about him, it's as if the crowd are willing him to succeed. COACH That's super-pathetic. Bringing Biff over to the corner, Bosley tags in CPA and holds Biff wide open for a shot to the ribs. CPA measures Biff, dishing out a couple more bodyshots that drop him. COLE As much as you may want to see Biff succeed, you've got to think he should find some new targets, besides CPA and Bosley, to be trying to beat. And CPA and Bosley just seem to be enjoying themselves everytime they step in the ring with Atlas. CPA lifts Biff back up, only to knock him back down with a headbutt. Wright calls for the tag and starts to put the loafers to Biff, before trapping him in a rear chinlock. COLE And now, the man who's vowed to go unbeaten until the end of time. Speaking of lofty goals. COACH The Centennial Man can do it, Michael. Unlike Biff he's got the talent to back those dreams up. He's The God Child! "LET'S GO BIFF!" "LET'S GO BIFF!" "LET'S GO BIFF!" The Love Doctors get the Milwaukee crowd chanting, trying to will Biff on. Hearing the chants, Biff looks as surprised as anyone. "LET'S GO BIFF!" "LET'S GO BIFF!" WRIGHT SILENCE! "LET'S GO BIFF!" "LET'S GO BIFF!" Biff starts to fight back to his feet, causing those that weren't chanting to suddenly believe there might be some point to doing so. An elbow is buried into the gut. A second. And a third. Biff is free and hits the ropes. A well-placed knee looks to be his downfall. But somehow, Biff stops and blocks the knee to the midsection! Tripping a shocked Wright up, Biff takes both legs and starts to propel Wright up off the mat, taking him around the ring with the GIANT SWING!! COACH AAAHHH! COLE Just like Wonder Woman! COACH COLE She used to spin around when she changed clothes...... I'm straight, okay! Letting go of Wright, Biff lacks the equilibrium that Wonder Woman apparantly had and falls to the mat as well. Both Wright and Biff are dizzy and they look around for a while, trying to find their corners. COLE Who's going to get the tag first? Despite all of the swinging, Wright gets the tag off to Bosley first... but Biff is there a second later, tagging in Dr. Max! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!!" Max jumps in over the top and beats Bosley to the punch, rocking him with a flurry of right hands. Off the ropes, Anderson ducks a clothesline and rocks Bosley back with a running dropkick. A second dropkick puts Bosley on the ropes, literally. And a clothesline sends him up and over the top to the floor! Anderson quickly sets his sights, looking for a big dive, but turns around right into a goozle from CPA. COACH ACK! With Anderson by the throat CPA doesn't think to watch out for Dr. Pigley, who springs off the top and wipes him out with a dropkick! COLE Always helps to get a SECOND OPINION. COACH We already made that joke dumbass. After a high-five The Love Docs set to work on CPA. Whipping the bigman off, they deliver the double inverted atomic drop again. Dr. Pigley then holds CPA in place, while Dr. Anderson comes off the ropes with the dropkick. Unusually the Lovematic Grampa isn't enough to put CPA down though, as he just staggers back to the ropes. Pigley and Anderson think quickly and nail CPA with a double clothesline. But still not enough to put him down. So they go to the gut. Two boots double up CPA, setting him up for a Double Flatliner. CPA still has quite the pulse yet though and with a big show of strength just closes his arms together, slamming Pigley and Anderson back-first into each other! COACH Woah! That's scary, right there! The Love Doctors are then nailed with a double clothesline from Allen. COLE The Love Doctors just getting manhandled by CPA! Bosley slides back in to help CPA out, as if he needed it. The illegal man, Pigley is tossed outside, leaving Dr. Max alone two on one. V.I.C.E look to send him to the ropes, but Dr. Max slides underneath the bottom rope. Confused, CPA and Bosley turn around to find Biff Atlas FLYING AT THEM WITH A DOUBLE CROSSBODY BLOCK!!!! COACH WHAT THE HELL!?!? 1... 2... KICKOUT! COLE I don't believe it, Biff can actually fly! COACH Yeah, well, neither can he. As Biff tries to take in his super-heroic feat, Wright sneaks up behind and blindsights him, tossing him outside to huge boos. COACH Haha, look, he flew again! Wright dusts his hands, then turns around into a flurry from Dr. Anderson. Quick lefts and rights stun The Natural, before Anderson does a 360 and connects with a spinning backfist. Wright is stunned, so Anderson hits the ropes. A running forearm staggers Wright some more. When Anderson hits the ropes again though, V.I.C.E step out in front of their partner and save him by DESTROYING Dr. Anderson with a double spinebuster slam!! "OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH That's what happens when you get messed up in V.I.C.E! Job done, CPA and Bosley step aside and take care of Pigley and Biff on the outside. All this leaving Wright to pick the bones. Scooping Dr. Anderson up, Wright hooks him up and delivers the STOCKMARKET CRASH, flipping the beaten Anderson over... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING!* COACH Chalk another one up for the The Centennial Man, baby! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winners of the match... the team of V.I.C.E... and CCHHHRRRIIIISSSTTIIIAAAAANN... WWWRRRRRIIIIIIGGHHHHTT!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" "Sharp Dressed Man" plays out again, as Wright stands over Anderson with his hands raised in victory. CPA and Bosley look up from the kicking they had been dishing out. And with the job done, they casually walk off to go party. COLE The undefeated streak goes on, Christian Wright continues to back up those complicated words. COACH Speaking of which. Wright grabs a microphone and calls for hush. WRIGHT From this day forth, I defiantely vow... no man, woman nor beast shall commit thine self to defeat! Wright raises his arms in victory, as V.I.C.E look back, brows raised slightly LATER TONIGHT TAG TEAM TITLE ON THE LINE! TEAM HEYROSS VS CAN AM ASSASSINS TONIGHT! COMMERCIAL

Eh, that's not a big deal. Morgan is only 19 years old herself. She's a teenager to!

ALIX AND ALF VS REJECT AND TK