Patty O'Green

[b]***Christian Wright W/Lorelei DeCenzo -VS- Jumbo***[/b] Match two of Christian Wright’s winning streak promise provided a hefty challenge in the big man from Chi Town. Being a smart man, Wright wisely avoided Jumbo early on. But this cat and mouse game caught up with him when Jumbo trapped him inside the corner. The big man took control of the contest, using his blubber to pound CW down. A close count was made after a second rope body splash from Jumbo. CW was able wrest the advantage away from his super sized foe with a low blow. After that Wright worked on the big man’s legs, chopping him down to size. Jumbo tried to make an inspired come back, but fell short after being struck with the Wright Off. CW hooked the legs and won his second match in a row. [b]Winner:[/b] Christian Wright, via pinfall, 2 win winning streak. Post match Wright conducted his new spiel “From this calendar day forward, as long as the sun may set, and the moon shall shine, I, Christian Wright, will concede neither pinfall nor submission to any man! Los Diablos hosted an All-Male costume contest with some of the OAOAST Performers, who scandalously steal a paycheck by never wrestling but yet show up to dress in funny looking outfits! Damn these leeches! First up in the costume contest was Deuce Bigelow dressed as Maurice Gibb from the Bee Gees. DB showed an exquiste understanding of subtle hypnotism provided by a man shaking his jelly rolls of fat while wearing over a thousand sequins. Envy those who saw it live. Uno paid homage to the old school OAOAST by dressing as Angle-Plex. Sure enough Angle-Plex’s buffoonery extended to costumes as when Uno went to the top rope he slipped and stumbled to the outside. The curse of Angle-Plex lives even through spandex! Baron Windells and Tim Cash pleased both luchadores with their chippendales stripper outfits. Showing that they don't discriminate, Mariachi and Moracca hooted over Quentin Benjamin's topless gladiator outfit. James Blonde came dressed as Landon Maddix. Poor James Blonde, poor simple James Blonde, when will his homoerotic fanaticism find proper boundaries? Los Diablos seemed to like it, finding it “very sexy!”, and Blonde ran backstage to tell Landon that two weirdos in pink batman outfits find a costumed version of him attractive. As JB left the scene, Melissa appeared on it. She said the men were making a mockery of costume contests, and the girls would give everyone a show at the HS with the first ever OAOAST Hottie costume contest. She said all the girl’s costumes would be better than the men’s, and that her’s would be the best of all! Let's just hope I feel like writing it!

Yes, yes, plz post the show! I may have Christian Wright Vs Jumbo, hopefully.

[size="5"][b][color="#FF0000"]HEY! WAIT! I GOT A NEW COMPLAINT![/color][/b][/size] The fans have a compliant also, namely they don’t want to see the Heavenly Rockers! But that’s exactly who they get as the duo of Synth Abdul Jabbar and Logan Mann stride out to a cemetery that’s covered with roving multicolored spotlights. Logan wears sunglasses and a leather jacket with his name stitched on the back and long leather pants with a bloodied sword down the right leg and a crazed angel on the left. Synth keeps it simple with white tights, Arabic style boots, and blue lens snowboarding goggle. Together they pull out magic markers and write D*LUX’s name on one of the tombstones. BUFFER The following is a cage match scheduled for a time limit of sixty minutes. Now making their way to the ring, from Sin City, Nevada, they are three time tag team champions and the only rock n wrestling band that matters, they are Synth Abdul Jabbar and Logan MACHO Macho Mann, THE HEAVENLY ROCKEERRRRSSSSS! Synth and Logan bang their heads as they walk down the entrance ramp surrounded by booing fans. COLE Now Maya, no Jade, no Holly, and no Abdullah. This is between four men who absolutely hate each other. And they've all been waiting a very long time for this moment, this match, this confrontation. COACH It’s a culture clash, Mikey, between hard rock and partying, and teeny bopper PG rated teen culuture. As Logan and Synth enter the cage, “Makes Me Wonder” plays to a large pop from the fans. Dressed in red denim cargo pants and jean jackets, the much loved duo of D*LUX rushes onto the stage. They seem a little lost without their management team, but can still manage to whip the crowd into a frenzy. Perhaps most important of all…THEY HAVE CANDY! BUFFER And their opponents form Detroit, Michigan, they are “ Showtime” Shayne, “Tremendous” Tyler……D*LUUUUUXXXXXXXXX! D*LUX rolls down the entry way, shaking hands, and passing out candy to the fans. Some of these fans decide to use them as projectiles to launch at The Rockers. Apparently the foolish fans don't notice there's a 15 foot cage guarding them! COLE This is one of the biggest matches of D*LUX’s career. A cage match against three time tag team champions, The Heavenly Rockers. Winning this match may put them among the elite level teams in our sport. DING DING DING Logan stomps about the ring as though he were a man possessed, cursing all those who lie outside the cage. Synth for his part merely points to Logan and yells “That’s what yer dealing with” at D*LUX COLE Logan Mann without a doubt has the shortest temper in the entire history of the OAOAST. Never have I seen a man so quick to be angered. COACH In this he has a right to be heated! His team has been harassed nonstop by D*LUX and their spoiled brat friends. I’d wanna pop some heads to if I was Logan. D*LUX has enough of Logan’s lunacy and Synth’s taunting, and immediately attack the two rock n wrestling legends. Their punches back The Rockers back to opposite corners. They keep their foes there for only a few seconds before Tyler whips Mann across the ring. Shayne slides out the way and The MACHO Macho Mann collides with his long time partner. “YEAAAAAAAAA!” Mann stumbles out the corner, and finds himself thrown to the canvas with a sit down hip toss by Brave. The handsome teen idol then takes hold of his arm and twists him into a la magistral cradle. Referee Clem Buzzlefoxer counts the pin… ONE! TWO! A kickout by Mann! COLE We almost had an early ending to this crucial cage match. Mann is furious over what he feels his a slow count and lays into the elderly offical. But taking his eye off of Shayne was unwise; the pop superstar grabs him by the back and hurls Mann into the cage. The crowd is delighted to see that and continue to cheer as Tyler shoulders Synth stomach against the turnbuckles. With Synth weakened by those attacks, Tyler backs towards the center of the ring. He works the crowd up and then comes flying at Synth with a body splash. But the drummer rolls out the way, and Tyler takes a nasty crash into the turnbuckles. Synth is forced to avoid more D*LUX’s attacks as Brave comes charging in with a lariat! Synth ducks down and Tyler strikes his own partner directly in the chest. COACH Morons! That’s what they are. How you gonna come halfway across the ring and try to clothesline a guy who just avoided a body splash from two feet away? Synth sees this as his golden opportunity to escape and begins crawling up the steel cage. This doesn’t sit well with D*LUX and the duo recover to yank him off the cage. Together they batter him with punches and kicks and then irish whip him to the far ropes. As he comes back Tyler attempts to floor him with a lariat. But Synth ducks that attack, only to run head first into a boot from Shayne. Fortunately Abdul Jabbar is saved from further beatings by Logan who comes off the top rope with an axe handle smash. Synth grabs onto Shayne’s arm and attempts to irish whip him. But the cute boybander reverses the hold and brings him into a short arm dropkick. “WE LOVE D*LUX! WE LOVE D*LUX! WE LOVE D*LUX!” Logan charges forward and is promptly hurricanranaed away. Frustrated, he slams his fist against the mat repeatedly and howls at the referee. COLE This guy can get mad about anything! Mann jumps to his feet and takes a mad dash towards Brave. The former HI-YAH tag champion leaps upwards and again hurricanrana’s the hot head. Mann winds up in a corner, but shrugs aside his injuries to begin climbing the cage from the turnbuckle. COACH Hurry, Logan! The quicker you get this over the closer you’ll be to victory over these clowns! Logan barely makes it up a few inches before Brave springboards off the ropes and spears him to the ground. Mann groans in agony, his body pounded by the pain. The audience cheers loudly as the Detroit native makes the pinfall.. ONE! TWO! SYNTH BREAKS UP THE PINFALL WITH AN ELBOW DROP! “BOOOOOOO!” The fans poor mood quickly dissipates as Tyler Bryant returns to batter Synth with right hands to the back of the head. Abdul Jabbar rises past these strikes and lashes out to strike Bryant in the face with a goggle assisted headbutt. A second one follows and dumps Tyler against the ropes. Synth takes a run of the ropes on his own and comes back to body check Tyler into the cage. After Tyler sinks back to the canvas, Synth drags him him forward and attempts a pinfall… ONE! TWO! A kickout by Tyler. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Less pleased is Mann, who goes into another one of his angered rage filled rants. After being calmed down slightly by Abdul Jabbar, he assists his partner in bringing Tyler to his feet. Together they hook Tyler inside a front facelock and give the booing audience the finger twirl of [b]doom[/b]. Seeing this the fans urge Bryant to fight his way out the hold. COLE These OAOAST Marks know exactly what that means! COACH Yeah it means Tyler’s match is over. No one survives the Percussion! However the Percussion DDT never occurs thanks to Tyler countering with an impressive double northern lights suplex. The fans offer a large pop to that impressive showing. He then leaps to his feet and fires up the sold out audience. COLE The Rockers got tricked and Tyler Bryant got a treat! Mann gets to his feet and takes another one of his mad runs at Bryant. But the boyband hottie elevates his foe onto his shoulders for a Samoan Drop. But Mann wiggles free of the hold and drops down safely to his blue boots. He then spins Tyler around and catches him with a snap Percussion DDT! The formerly joyful fans are now horrified at what they’ve seen. Tyler’s head rings with pain and he makes zero movements.. COLE Oh my, this might be it! COACH What do you mean might be? That dude is done and fried like Popeyes. COLE Love me some Chicken from Popeyes. Mann hooks both of Tyler’s legs for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Shayne Brave breaks up the pinfall with a sliding dropkick to Mann’s face. As you can no doubt imagine, Mann throws his usual outrageous fit, dumping his anger on the elderly referee. Shayne manages to beat him away from Clem and chase him to the corner. He climbs to the second rope and begins blasting his foe with powerful punches. “ONE!” “TWO!” “THREE!” “FOUR!” “FIVE!” Logan regains his strength and grabs onto Tyler’s denim jeans. He prepares to launch him forward with a powerbomb but Tyler leaps from his shoulders and catches hold of the steel cage. After that amazing display of athleticism, the Tremendous One begins climbing the cage. COLE Tyler making his escape, and he’s got to be fast! Tyler, however, is not fast enough as Logan and Synth both pull him down from the cage. Synth takes a wild fury fueled swing, but misses Tyler entirely and instead clocks his partner. LOGAN SHIT, GOD DAMN IT! THAT’S MY FUCKIN NOSE! Ignoring Logan’s vulgar rant, Tyler focuses on attacking Synth. But he doesn’t have the striking ability to compete with Synth, as the drummer headbutts him away with his goggles. COLE There is something seriously wrong with him being aloud to wear SNOWBOARDING goggles in a wrestling ring, and then using those goggles to knock everyone out. COACH It’s a Halloween costume! COLE Its a Halloween costume 365 days of the year? Synth begins a climb up the cage, using the ropes to boost himself up. But unaware to him, is Shayne taking position onto the second rope. His arms circle around Synth’s paunchy waist, causing Abdul Jabbar to panic wildly. Synth tries to kick his way free, but Shayne succeeds in German suplexing him off the ropes! “YEAAAAAAAA!” the audience pops as the two men crash into the canvas. Synth screams are loud and plentiful and a joy to the fans. Shayne hooks the legs for a pinfall…. ONE! TWO! Synth kicks out at the last possible nanosecond. “WE LOVE D*LUX! WE LOVE D*LUX! WE LOVE D*LUX!” COLE What OAOAST Mark doesn’t love these two kids? Their as exciting as any tag team in this sport. COACH Yeah, and their braincells are like dinosaurs. Extinct! Shayne brings Abdul Jabbar to his feet and launches him against the ropes. Coming back, Synth looks to hit his foe with a diving headbutt. But Brave counters with an amazing leg lariat! Another pinfall results… ONE! TWO! Synth again kicksout. He rolls quickly to his feet, clutching his face and putting up his free arm as a shield. Shayne doesn’t mind the defenses and throws out a superkick. Synth avoids the strike by spinning around but this carries him into a superkick by Tyler! The fans are overjoyed with the strike and continue cheering as Tyler tries for a fall… ONE! TWO! Synth brings his shoulder off the canvas. COLE Somehow someway, Synth Abdul Jabbar is finding a way to survive two on one odds. The teen heartthrobs hunch over, waiting for Synth’s rise. When he finally steps to his feet, he’s met with two superkicks screaming towards his face. Abdul Jabbar acts fast, and dives down to take them both out with chop blocks. COACH Look at the way Synth handles his business. He’s got the Hit Me Baby One More Time coming at him, and he just drops down and smokes them both out. That’s a veteran for you. The Vegas native picks Shayne up and throws him into the steel cage. As Shayne lies against the cage, Synth runs to the ropes. When he comes back, he leaps forward with legs extended and dropkicks him almost through the cage. Tyler falls backwards hanging himself in the ropes. This allows a recovered Logan to rush forward and strike him with his [b]POWERFUL LEFT HAND[/b]! “OHHHHHHHHH!” Synth and Logan lift Tyler up off the canvas, and hook him into twin front facelocks. They raise him high into the sky, his feet pointing towards the rafters. From there they drop backwards and throw him back against the cage! COLE Brutal attacks by The Rockers, how much more can Tyler take from the Rock N Wrestling legends? “LET’S GO D*LUX! LET’S GO D*LUX! LET’S GO D*LUX!” The crowds energy provides Bryant with some life and teen hottie begins fighting back against his aggressors. He manages to knock Logan away with a discus punch, as Synth takes off to the ropes. Synth rushes back to him, but is insantly dumped to the canvas with a Samoan Drop. COLE VINTAGE Tyler Bryant! Tyler lays across Synth’s body for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Logan breaks up the pin count. “BOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE The OAOAST Marks sticking firmly behind D*LUX tonight at the Halloween Spectacular. Logan grabs Bryant by the scruff of his neck and tries to lead him to the corner. But Bryant breaks free of his grip and shoves Mann into the corner. Before Logan can even move his way out the corner, Bryant leaps forward and crushes his back with a body splash. As Logan staggers out the corner, Tyler takes a run of the ropes. Once he reaches Mann he leaps forward and catches him with a Phantom Neckbreaker. The audience pops loudly as Mann is thrown against the canvas. COACH Ah! Logan, my brother, how you gonna let that one twenty pound dude sneak up on you? That ain’t hip-hop, homie! Tyler hooks the legs for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Logan kicksout! Though free of Tyler’s pin, it weighs on his mind as he verbally cuts apart old man Clem for a fast count. COLE Come on! That’s an eighty five year old man you’re threatening. Show some class! COACH Class is overrated, winning is all that matters, and Clem is keeping The Rockers from winning. Tyler starts to make his way up the cage, which prompts a grand reaction from the crowd. However, he can’t make it very far before Synth jumps onto the cage to confront him. The two begin trading blows with extreme fury. COLE High drama on the cage! Synth and Tyler continue to bat it out as the crowd watches on the edge of their seats. Synth eventually wins out when he starts kicking at Tyler’s legs. Enough kicks cause Tyler to fall from the cage and crotch himself on the ring ropes! “OHHHHHHHHHH!” COACH I bet there’s a good eight thousand girls in this arena willing to massage that injury away. Mann sees Bryant’s poor state as chance to go for the kill. He runs to the third rope, and then shoots forward to capture Tyler’s head. He falls backwards and spikes him into the canvas with a Percussion DDT! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COACH YO~! That’s it! Its over! Mann certainly hopes so as he goes for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! TYLER AMAZINGLY KICKS OUT! The fans can’t believe it and let out the biggest pop of the contest. COLE Simply incredible, folks! LOGAN [img=http://fc03.deviantart.com/fs37/f/2008/242/d/8/Wrath_by_Oktanas.gif][img=http://fc03.deviantart.com/fs19/f/2007/258/1/2/swearing_by_8BitLoser.gif][img=http://fc07.deviantart.com/fs45/f/2009/078/b/3/_frustrated__revamp_by_brokenboulevard.gif][img=http://fc09.deviantart.com/fs31/f/2008/189/2/e/Tantrum_Emoticon_by_aussie_gal.gif][img=http://fc00.deviantart.com/fs10/i/2006/081/1/e/_furious__by_Taimotive.gif][img=http://fc05.deviantart.com/fs23/f/2007/310/e/7/_steaming__revision_by_Mrichston.gif][img=http://fc08.deviantart.com/fs41/f/2009/026/9/e/I__AM__MAD__by_Lesslya.gif] :angry: :9mm: [img=http://emoticons4u.com/mad/1335.gif] [img=http://emoticons4u.com/mad/206.gif] [img=http://emoticons4u.com/mad/boese079.gif] [img=http://www.websmileys.com/sm/mad/846.gif] SYNTH :o COLE Oh my! Clem Buzzlefoxer has had enough of enduring Logan’s tantrums and bitter rants. This major straw breaks the camels well worn back and causes Clem to DQ’the MACHO Macho Mann! “YEAAAAAAAA!” LOGAN WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT? CLEM You heard me, sonny boy, now get out here before I whip out my whopping stick. LOGAN You're what?! CLEM My penis! Logan continues to throw a temper tantrum, swinging at the air and stomping on the ground. No one in the arena can quite believe they are witnessing a grown man devolve into an enraged maniac of immense proportions. COACH You can’t DQ someone in a cage match! COLE Repeated abuse of an official is not tolerated in any OAOAST contest. Logan and his anger have finally crossed the line and now he has to suffer the consequences. Only after Clem threatens to DQ both rockers does Logan exit the ring, cursing at everyone within in earshot. When he reaches the outside he picks up the steel stairs and throws them at the cage. When the stairs hit the ground, Logan merely picks them back up and throws them back at the cage! “NAAANAAA NAAANAAAA HEY, HEY, GOOD BYE” the oh so clever crowd sings. Back inside the ring Synth is back to his feet, and horrified at what he’s just seen. But he hasn’t a moment to argue before Shayne Brave is upon him. The boybander takes him with right hands before irish whipping him to the ropes. As Synth returns, Brave attempts a leg lariat! But Synth ducks beneath it, only to run right into a Yakuza Kick from Tyler! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” The boys wait for Synth to scrape himself off the canvas. When he does, Tyler attempts to lift him into a samoan drop. But Synth counters by rolling up the Detroiter. ONE! TWO! Tyler rolls through! ONE! TWO! Synth rolls through and out the pin, jumping to his feet. Unfortunately he’s met with an Inverted Atomic drop by Shayne. Only seconds later Tyler nails him with a second yakuza kick that saps all life out of him! COLE Synth just got his body rocked! Tyler attempts a pinfall and the fans count along… CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE! DING DING DING BUFFER Your winner as a result of pinfall….D*LUX! COLE A big win for D*LUX here at the Halloween Spectacular! COACH A tainted win thanks to old crazy ass adult diapers Clem Buzzlefoxer! Put that horse out its misery, Clem done messed up again The fans are extremely delighted with the favorable outcome and come to their feet to cheer. Mann, on the other hand, flops onto the ground and holds his hand over his head. He can not fathom for the life of him how his team was beaten by “pop sissies”. His latest fit is so bad that security has no choice but to escort him from ringside before he harms himself of the fans. D*LUX only shrug their shoulders and celebrate with Maya and Jade who have made their way into the ring.

Fun match to open the show, Bosley was great in this one. What a change he has made from when he debuted. I bet Tony wasn't thinking this when he created the character! Strong showing from the OCC. I had been meaning to turn LC face after they got attacked by the Moneygang but never I got around to it. Maybe sometime I'll have the time for it, or maybe they'll just be tweeners from now on. Tru story I really did forget to do the paint picture of Krista's grandmother. Oops!

Added on today's HeldDOWN~! Cage match: The Heavenly Rockers Vs D*LUX Also on HS: US TITLE-ThunderKid Vs Alix Maria Spezia

I am a Real American Dick! Exploding on the face of every woman! I am Real American Dick! Suck on my balls, till I cum like Niagara falls! When I come crashing down and its throbbing deep inside I'’ll leave you wetter than a flood tide I gotta bend you over that'’s how I like to ride! I date a girl who whips my hide And my 12 inches is my greatest pride I am a Real American Dick! Exploding on the face of every woman! I am Real American Dick! Suck on my balls, till I cum like Niagara falls! "Womanizer" by Britney Spears replaces the most vulgar entrance tune in the OAOAST. Through the golden pyro that rolls from the ceiling, Mister Dick and Malaysia emerge onto stage. The jeers are furious as Mister Dick, clad in white speedos and shiny white chaps, flexes his powerful muscles. Behind him Malaysia, in bikini briefs and a black corset, massages his baby oil coated body. COLE The Urban Cowboy, the Phallic Phenom, call him what you will but he is trying make lightening strike twice. He made history at Amglemania being the first person to ever beat Krista one on one, and tonight in this non title match he goes for a second win! BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from San Antonio, Texas... weighing two hundred and thirty eight pounds. He is accompanied to the ring by MALAYSIA and represents THE DEADLY ALLIANCE... "THE HUMAN HARD ON"... MMMIIIIIIIIIIISSSSTTEEEERRRRRR... DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKK!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" The baby oil coated gladiator slides into the ring. He stares at the women in the front row, as he furiously humps the canvas. Behind him Malaysia cracks her whip, urging him to hump harder Give me those bright lights, long nights High rise, over time "YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Give me them bright lights, long nights Party till the sun is rising High rise, over time Working till the moon is shining Hot guys, fly girls Never thought I'd say I feel on top of the world I feel on top of the world Hey! Dacners dressed in sexy military garb of camo booty shorts, and tight camo tank tops fill a stage that’s flooded by pink and golden lights. Through the entrance doors comes the hottest dancer of them all, Krista Isadora Duncan in a black mini skirt and camo tank top cut low to give the crowd a pleasing amount of cleavage. She twirls through the dancers that battle over her, and holds up her world title BUFFER And introducing the opponent! Hailing from Los Angeles, California! She is a Hollywood Walk of Famer, the 2009 Wrestler of the year, best selling author, and star of the world famous FIT with KID line of exercise videos. Tonight, she steps into hostile territory and comes face to face with those she has overcome in the past, hoping to come out the other side victorious once more. She is the MASTER of the Kidology and a two-time, reigning and defending OAOAST HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WWOOOORRRRRLLLLLDD... KKRRRRRIIIIIISSSTTTAAAAAA... ISADORA DDUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANN!!!!!!! Krista glides down an entrance ramp that’s covered with sparkling red and orange confetti. Upon hitting the end of the ramp, she tosses her head back and offers a sensually charming smile to the camera. COLE Krista is only a week away from a world title defense against Leon Rodez, but tonight her mind is focused solely on getting revenge against her archrival Mister Dick! Doing her best to ignore the stares of Malaysia and Mister Dick, the world champion climbs up the ring apron. Her legs cross the ring ropes, and bend her upside down, allowing her to blow a kiss to the roaring, and very turned on, audience. COLE Such hatred between these two foes. DING DING DING “You ain’t leavin Texas with my world title, grand ma!” “Not you, the other old hag.” “Where the hell are you old bitches comin from?” Mister Dick decides to leave that quandary alone and dives at Krista hoping to snare her in a double leg takedown. But the walk of famer meets his attack, by circling her arms around his head. Mister Dick struggles against her grip and is able to break the hold in order to flip her over with a fireman’s carry. Mister Dick keeps hold of her body and flips her over into a pinning situation… ONE! TWO! Krista lifts her shoulder off the canavs. But there’s no chance to catch her breath as the Cocky Prick quickly squeezes her inside a grounded front facelock. “Come on, grandma, give it up to ol Jockie!” “If I’m going to lose to you, let my grandmother be squashed by a bus.” Krista replies. PRETEND THERE IS FUNNY PAINT PICUTRE OF KRISTA’S GRANDMOTHER BEING SQUASHED BY BUS! “That was unfortunate.” She adds. Forgetting the bad paint job, Krista uses every bit of strength in her body to power out the hold and take Mister Dick into an armbar. Unfortunately she isn’t able to do the damage she wants to do, thanks to The Human Hard On reaching out with his long arms to grab the ropes. “What the hell?” Krista wonders why she had to stop the submission. Referee Earl Hebner replies, “You can’t attack someone when they’re on the ropes.” “So I could just sit on the ropes all day and no one could touch me? WHY DIDN’T ANYONE TELL ME THIS SOONER!??!!!” While Krista ponders a life of inaction, Mister Dick tries to sneak her by surprise. He captures one of her long muscled legs and attempts to bring her down to the canvas. But Krista isn’t taken by surprise and wraps her arms around his head. She pushes forward and pins him against the mat. ONE! TWO! Mister Dick kicksout the pinfall, and quickly rolls to his feet. Krista follows him upwards and is met with series of right jabs from the surly Texan. These strikes allow him to capture her inside a headlock. But that hold doesn’t last for very long as Krista shoves him into the ropes. But when he returns, The Human Hard On runs through her with a shoulder block. “BOOOOOOOOOO!” the fans express their displeasure as The Human Hard On flexes his impressive Adonis like muscles. Next Mister Dick rushes to the ropes, and as he bounces off them Krista attempts to trip him up. But he avoids her basic tactic by leaping over her body and continuing towards the opposite ropes. As he returns he stretches out his 6’5 body into a cross body block. But the fitness queen springs into the air and slashes him with a dropsault! Mister Dick tumbles back down to the canvas, where he curses a blue streak. COLE Mister Dick wasn’t expecting that! Krista shows off some break dancing ability, by twisting around with a handstand before flipping forward and landing a senton onto MD’s brawny chest. A pinfall quickly follows. ONE! TWO! But the Human Hard On shoves himself out the pinfall. He then crawls to the ropes, hoping that they’ll aid him to his feet. But unfortunately for him Krista decides to use his positioning against him, and chokes him into the ropes by sitting on his head. “Krista, remember what I said about the ropes?” The referee asks her. KRISTA “I’m not doing anyone any harm, am I?” Apparently not as the drooling referee backs away from the luscious babe. Eventually Krista grows tired of choking Mister Dick with the ropes. This leads her to snare her arms around his neck, and lead him into the center of the ring. At the center of the ring Krista gives him the most devastating move one can imagine…she drums the tune of girls just wanna have fun on his skull. COLE When the night is said and done- COACH Girls just wanna have fun. Needless to say Mister Dick grows tired of being humiliated. Thusly he’s required to exert his raw strength in pushing himself out of Krista’s annoying hold. The fitness queen quickly attempts to strike at him, but he drops to his knees and uses his leverage to flip Krista to the canvas with a fireman’s carry. Not wanting to give the world champion any chance to sneak away, the Urban Cowboy snares her into a simple reverse chinlock. Krista instantly begins coughing and wheezing as the hold taxes her ability to breathe. This greatly pleases Mister Dick, and he makes the situation all the more painful by stretching their bodies down along the mat. “K-I-D! K-I-D! K-I-D!” Houston bleats. But there of little help to Krista, who suffers through Mister Dick ramming his knees into her upper back. He then glides his right leg over her body in an attempt to trap her onto the canvas. But this has the unfortunate side effect of weakening his grip, allowing Krista to simply break it apart. Frustrated he begins hammering Krista with illegal closed fists. This earns a warning from Hebner that’s met with annoyed growl from the studly Texan. As he argues with the referee, Krista manages to bring herself upright. But there’s little she can do, as MD is immediately upon her with a side headlock. He then flips her over, throwing her down to the mat. There he keeps her locked with in his powerful chiseled arms and does near unbearable amount of damage to her neck. “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” MD continues to inflict pain upon her, this time by forcing her to rise upwards. But Krista succeeds in taking advantage of this situation by shoving him off to the ropes. His return sees him leap frogging the ducking world champion. He bounces off the opposite ropes and charges towards Krista with a lariat. But the sexy Miss California hikes up her skirt and nails him with the BUNS OF STEEL! “YEAAAAAA!” the fans scream as Krista spanks her tight tanned tush for their pleasure. She then flips backwards and strikes her foe with a moonsaulting elbow drop. Krista then sits on top of him for a pinfal…. ONE! TWO! Mister Dick stays alive with a last minute kickout. He rolls to his feet, still dazed by Krista’s buns of steel. This leads to his downfall as Miss California slams her heels into him with a dropkick. While he lies battered on the floor, Krista rushes to the ropes. She leaps onto the third one and flies backwards with a lionsault. But Mister Dick slides out the way and she’s forced to crash into the canvas. Instantly Mister Dick regains his strength and scrambles atop her for a pin… ONE! TWO! Krista’s shoulders come off the canvas and earn a great pop from the audience. Less thrilling to the OAOAST Marks is the leaping knee drop Mister Dick drives into her forehead. Another pinfall follows… ONE! TWO! Krista again finds her way out the pinfall. Unpleased with that result, Mister Dick jumps to his feet and lays into Hebner. After dousing Hebner with angered fire, Mister Dick orders Krista back up. Her rise is slow, but when she finally stands he rushes forward with a Stiff Kick! But Krista ducks the attack, and MD harmlessly sails past her. Seeking to take advantage of his miss, she makes a quick leap onto the second ropes and comes back with a diving crossbody block. But The Human Hard On counters into a spine buster! As she wails in agony, Mister Dick towers above her gently massaging his six packed stomach. “NEEDLE DICK! NEEDLE DICK! NEEDLE DICK!” The fans are all the more enraged when Mister Dick mounts her in military position for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Thankfully Krista kicksout, but then suffers the humiliation of being dry humped! “BOOOOOOOOOOO!” the fans scream, while Malaysia stands outside smiling over the sexual abuse. COACH Like they wouldn’t do the same thing if they had a chance! Mister Dick calls an end to his shameful practice, and instead hooks Krista into a neck vice. The pain is almost immediate and Krista hollers out in anguish. “Make her scream, baby, make her cry!” Malaysia shouts, almost at the point of delerium. Mister Dick follows orders as best he can, cranking and grinding her sore neck. But even with this pain, Krista has the strength to fight to her feet. Now upright she peppers Mister Dick’s baby oil slicked body with right hands. The blows do enough damage to cause The Human Hard On to break the hold. Angrily, he whips her into the far ropes. When the cables bounce her back he steps forward for a lariat. But the fitness queen slides between the gap in his legs. She immediately pops back to her feet and darts at MD. But the Cocky Prick turns her over into a powerslam. The referee counts the pinfall… ONE! TWO! Krista’s shoulder comes off the canvas, leaving Mister Dick to ponder how he failed to secure victory. Mumbling to himself he stands upright where a burst of confidence causes him to grab onto his crotch and taunt the audience. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Smiling at the reaction, Mister Dick pounds at Krista with his white cowboy boots. “Come on, ya old hag, you ain’t got nothin’ fer me, do ya?” He taunts her. “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” “Shaddup! All of ya!” Mister Dick snaps back. He then scoops Krista up by her top and flings her into a neutral corner. He then charges forward and forces her to bite his shiny metal dick! COACH Mister Dick is getting the taste of some sweet, sweet, revenge! After Krista slumps over to the floor, The Urban Cowboy hooks onto her well insured legs for a fall… ONE! TWO! Krista kicksout the pinfall, to the incredible surprise of MD and Malaysia. They both smash the canvas with their angered fists. COLE Neither of these two can be feeling good about Mister Dick’s chances as he’s continually failed to put Krista away. COACH Fool ass fool! Mister Dick’s got a whole bunch more weapons in his arsenal. Mister Dick now stomps at her neck, doing his best to drain her of any energy. He can only go down this path so long as Hebner steps in to stop him from further hurting the fitness queen. With MD in conversation with the referee, Malaysia is able to sneak herself beneath the bottom rope and choke away at Krista. “Don’t you love it? Don’t you love it when I choke you? Doesn’t this turn you on like it does me?” Malaysia shrieks in Krista’s ear. COLE This is disgusting to see! COACH But it works so very well. Nothing’s stopping Krista from having Alix out here and distracting Mister Dick. With Malaysia’s handiwork over, The Human Hard On attempts another pinfall… ONE! TWO! The fans are delighted to see Krista kickout and instantly begin chanting her name. “K-I-D! K-I-D! K-I-D!” Mister Dick is back on his feet and screams at Krista to reach her feet. Very slowly she’s able to make some progress. Yet this rise is not fast enough for MD, and he continues his loud shouting. Eventually the walk of famer fully gets to her feet. That’s when The Human Hard On picks her up in hopes of hitting a tilt a whirl slam. However, Krista shocks him, however, by twirling around his muscular physique and nailing him with a tornado DDT! “YEAAAAAAAAAAA!” The audience rallies their girl with chants of her name, as both competitors try to make it to their feet. With the aid of the ring ropes, they’re able to lift their exhausted bodies from the canvas. Once they’re finally upright they come together at the center of the ring to trade punches. But, Krista is too weak to stand and trade with the Texas A&M alum, so she must resort to her usual trickery. “Hey,Jock, Joey Fatone was the fat one in N Sync and then somebody realized his name spells fatone. Who do you think the first person was to realize that?” “How the hell would I know that!” “Three jews in a pickle jar, leave me alone, Jock!” “You started talkin’ to me first!” “No I didn’t!” “Yes you did!” “Nooooooo!” “Yeeeeeeeees! Krista pokes Mister Dick in the eye! As the fans cheer that tactic Krista leaps into the air and strikes her foe down with a flipping heel kick. Krista promptly proceeds to do jumping jacks on his sprawled out body. This draws a large cheer from the stands, though most of it is for her fantastic breasts bouncing in such a glorious manner. Krista cuts the pleasuring show short, and drops down onto MD for a pinfall…. ONE! TWO! NO-----Mister Dicks throws his shoulder off the canvas. Krista quickly picks him up, seeking to continue her offensive flurry. But as she leads MD off the canvas, he shocks her with a rollup and a hook of her mini skirt! ONE! TWO! Hebner sees the hook of the tights and immediately ends his count to chastise MD. Neither The Cocky Prick nor Malaysia appreciates this and they both spew their venom at the referee. Unfortunately for Mister Dick this leads to Krista rolling him into a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Mister Dick narrowly avoids defeat with a desperate kickout! COLE That was close, so very close! Mister Dick has to get back on track and on gameplan otherwise this match will have a very different outcome than the one at Anglemania. Mister Dick makes an effort to catch a breather and readjust his strategy as he sits on the corner posts. Krista however is no fan of this tactic and rushes after him. But as she approaches he flips forward to haul her to the canvas with a sunset flip. However, the world champion rolls through and pops up to send a running knee at her foe. But Mister Dick dodges it and Krista misses him entirely. She springs onto the second rope and comes off with a strike aimed at MD. But he leaps upwards and connects with a dropkick that takes her out the air. “OHHHHHHHH” Breathing heavy, Mister Dick crawls onto her body for a fall… ONE! TWO! Krista pops out of the pin! “YEAAAAAAAAA!” Krista hurries to her feet and brushes by Mister Dick to head to the ropes. She hops onto the third one and uses it to launch herself across the ring with an enziguri. But Mister Dick ducks the strike, and Krista is forced into a rolling landing. She quickly kips up and comes after MD with a rushing high knee. But he wheels around her, snatches her slender waist inside his arms and bridges her backwards with a German Suplex! ONE! TWO! Krista kicksout, causing a large roar from the OAOAST Marks. COACH We were inches away from a Mister Dick victory! Mere inches, Mikey! COLE But, Krista, so resilient, finds ways to keep hope alive. “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” the fans chant to the fallen heroine. Smirking to himself, MD lifts the Los Angeles native off the canvas and hooks her into a full nelson. He then swings her forward driving her to the mat with the Pure Penetration. Malaysia purrs in erotic ecstasy, and Mister Dick flexes his powerful muscles before attempting a pinfall… ONE! TWO! No! Krista shoots her shoulder upright. “YEAAAAAAAAAA!” On the opposite end from the fans’ joy is an outraged Mister Dick who screams his frustration with the loudest voice he can muster. COLE Well, the Anglemania win did not come easy for Mister Dick and tonight it won’t come easy either. MD lifts Krista off the canvas and roughly shoves her into a corner. Continuing his screaming and shouting he runs to give her another taste of his shiny metal dick. But Krista gets her expensive heels up and strikes him away to the crowd’s glee. As he stumbles backwards Krista climbs to the top rope, hunching over to give the front row crowd an eye pleasing view up her skirt. But, she never gets the chance to execute any offense as MD springs to life and throws her from the top rope! Krista hits the canvas hard, and shouts of pain push through her gritted teeth. After crotch chopping the booing audience, The Human Hard On attempts a pinfall… ONE! TWO! NO A KICKOUT! The fans are again overjoyed and clap loudly for Krista’s survival. Mister Dick, however, returns to his highly noisy bellyaching. With red flashing in his eyes, he blindly charges her with the lethal Stiff Kick! But Krista sweeps out his leg and he tumbles to the canvas! From there Krista bounces off the ropes and strikes Mister Dick with a running knee ala John Morrison. COLE VINTAGE Krista! "Oh (hey!), I've been travelin' on this road too long Just tryin' to find my way back home But the old me's dead and gone Dead and gone And oh (hey!), I've been travelin' on this road too long Just tryin' to find my way back home But the old me's dead and gone Dead and gone, dead and gone..." The opening to "Dead And Gone" by T.I. fades into "Numb" by Linkin Park, creating an intense anger in the arena and inside Krista. COLE What is this? Krista turns her attention towards the entrance ramp, expecting Leon Rodez to appear. She puts her hands on her hips, and raises a skeptical eye as the music plays without any signs of the number one contender. COLE Where is he? Krista asks the same question for several seconds, before finally giving up. She turns around and is left KO’ed by a Stiff Kick! “BOOOOOOOOOOOO!” A pinfall quickly follows….. ONE! TWO! THREE! DING DING DING! COLE COACH My nigga did it again! Mister Dick spins around in wonderful celebration, before falling into the arms of Malaysia. Krista is back awake, and looks none too happy with the outcome. But her eyes don’t devour Mister Dick, instead she stares violently at Leon Rodez who claps atop the entrance stage. COLE Leon Rodez has got Krista, and cost her her rematch against Mister Dick! But what will be the outcome at the Halloween Spectacular? Find out next week on TSM! FADE OUT

PRESENTED IN HD FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY -OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT- We come to the OAOAST Arena Where Michael Cole and Johnathan Coachman sit at a desk decorated with various Halloween props such as pumpkins, orange and black streamers, and standups of mummies and vampires. COLE Ladies and gentlemen it is time for the number one rated show on cable television, OAOAST HeldDOWN~! We are just a week away from the Halloween Spectacular and our show tonight is red hot with a mainevent Anglemania rematch between Mister Dick and world champion Krista Isadora Duncan! "I can feel it coming in the air tonight, oh lord And I've been waiting for this moment For all my life, oh lord Oh lord." COLE Let's kick it off with a little V.I.C.E.! Nonpoint's version of "In The Air Tonight" brings out the OAOAST's V.I.C.E squad, CPA cracking his knuckles ready for action and Detective Bosley in his casuals. Reaching into their front pockets, CPA pulls out a cigar and Bosley a cigarette. They light up, take a puff of nicotine and look out at the world contently. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first, being accompanied by his V.I.C.E partner, TANGO BOSLEY. Weighing two hundred, eighty pounds and hailing from Miami, Florida... CHRISTOPHER PATRICK ALLEN... C... P... A!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Smoking away without a care in the world, V.I.C.E saunter down to the ring. Taking up a corner, Bosley calls over a cameraman and goes into a long rant about his weekend, "curbstomping underage drunk punk bitch pussies outside the local YMCA"... and the camera cuts away mid-story to CPA posing in the ring. COLE There's a guy with some issues, right there. COACH Yeah, of Maxim magazine. Because he's a man. Take some notes or something. As CPA is forced to put out his cigar by the referee, with no fanfare or music enters Biff Atlas, taking the crowd a little by surprise. What with the no music thing and all. Biff walks out deep in thought, occassionally looking up and seeing where he is. BUFFER And his opponent! From Venice Beach, California and weighing two hundred, twenty pounds... BBIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFF... AAAAAATTLLLLLAAAAAAAASSSSSSSS!!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" COLE A warm reaction for Biff Atlas, who's been going through some mental trials and tribulations as of late. COACH That's what happens when you've got a brain the size of a pea. COLE Well Biff's got a lot on his mind. COACH I bet that hurts, what with it being the size of a pea. COLE You just have endless material at your disposal, don't you? Biff climbs into the ring, a little absent-minded as he almost trips on the ropes. That causes Bosley to laugh like a madman and Biff looks around bewildered. *DINGDINGDING* Getting his head together Biff squares up to CPA in the middle of the ring. The bigman smiles down at Biff, who looks around a little, before attempting a bodyslam! COACH Gotta be kidding me. After two attempts Biff limps away holding his back and CPA just shakes his head. Biff psyches himself up and tries again, but again fails to lift CPA's feet even a centimetre off the mat. Biff wonders why his powers have deserted him and tries to focus his energy... or, something... while CPA looks outside to Bosley, confused. COACH I thought we'd already ruled out super strength? COLE I don't even know anymore. The fans encourage Biff to try again and perhaps it's people power running through Atlas. CPA just stands and motions to Biff, letting him have a free attempt. Biff rubs his hands together and deep in concentration, he moves in again. CPA just smiles, confident he won't be lifted... ...but Biff doesn't even try, instead rolling Allen over to the mat and pinning him down! COLE Oh wait a minute! 1... 2... CPA kicks out! COLE Biff's smarter than we thought! He almost shocked CPA right there! CPA gets back up and is clubbed across the chest with a forearm blow. A second. And a third. Realising he's getting nowhere fast Biff turns and runs the ropes, getting more momentum behind a running forearm smash to the chest. But CPA just absorbs it. COACH If he were really smart, he wouldn't make the big black man angry! In need of a Plan B, Biff goes for a scoop slam... and soon remembers why he gave up on that plan in the first place. Biff's back gives way and CPA levels him with a clothesline. COACH For anyone not paying attention, yes, Michael Cole did think for a second that Biff Atlas may have out-smarted someone. COLE I don't know what I was thinking. Biff crawls to the ropes, looking for a reprieve. But doesn't get one. CPA stands on the back of Biff's head and leans on the ropes to force all his weight down on the skull of his opponent. As the referee backs CPA away, Bosley walks over and berates Atlas a little, before doing the same to a fan who dares to heckle him. Slowly pulled back up, Biff is leant up against the ropes by CPA, who shows him how it's done with a lung-emptying forearm. Biff gasps for air and is rocked with a headbutt! BOSLEY YEAH! BUTT HIM! BUTT HIM TILL HE BLEEDS BIGMAN! PENETRATE THAT FLESH! COACH An irish whip sends Biff for the ride, but the hapless hero amazes everyone by ducking CPA's clothesline. He bounces back off the ropes and lands a clothesline of his own, putting CPA back a step. CPA growls back at Biff though, throwing his own clothesline... but Biff throws his forearms up to block and strikes CPA across the chest with another clothesline! Atlas then hits the ropes, looking for a third with CPA off balance. But the bigman is right back at it and fells Biff with a Big Boot to the jaw! "OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Just as Biff was building some momentum. Cover by Allen... 1... 2... NO! Bosley chews out the referee, but CPA doesn't look too disheartened and drags Biff up again. COACH Could be Domination time. With a gutwrench, CPA throws Biff up over his shoulder, looking for the Dominator. Biff slips free though, landing on his feet! CPA cusses under his breath, turning around and getting forearmed in the face. COLE I tell you one thing, this is as much heart and resiliance as we've seen out of Biff Atlas in a long time. The will to win is certainly there. COACH Yeah, but what about the capacity to win? Biff blasts CPA with two more forearms, then tries an irish whip. The two hundred eighty pounder is going nowhere though. A firm tug sends Biff into a corner instead. Biff manages to sidestep out of the way of an avalanche though and CPA runs himself into the turnbuckles. COLE Maybe, Coach. Eyes lighting up, Biff sees an opportunity. He comes off the ropes with a big running high knee and CPA is staggered backwards, right back towards the ropes. Biff looks around, amazed. And he gives the signal for the big slam! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" COACH He's mad, Cole. MAD! As Allen staggers away from the ropes Biff sets himself and with all his might, he stoops down and scoops CPA up... about two inches off the mat, before his back gives way. A disappointed sigh fills the arena. CPA clubs Biff across the back to break free of his grip, then hits the ropes. Fist clenched, he looks for the GIGATON PUNCH... ...but Biff drops to his knees, covers up for dear life and ends up clipping CPA's knee. COLE I don't know if that was intentional, but it worked! Emerging from his hiding place Biff sees CPA limping and gets another boost of confidence. Grabbing CPA, he whips him to the ropes and ducks his head for a back bodydrop. CPA sees it coming way too early though. Putting on the brakes, CPA keeps Biff's body pressed down and delivers a headbutt, directly to the spine. Again the crowd sigh, all hope for Biff disappearing. And all hope is then destroyed, as CPA scoops Biff up and plants him with the DOMINATOR!! COLE That quickly, Domination is dealt! 1... 2... 3!!! *DINGDINGDING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the match... CHRISTOPHER PATRICK ALLEN... C P A!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" CPA rests his fist on Biff's chest, glaring out into the crowd as Bosley rolls in and hands him a victory cigar.

Backstage we find Morgan, wearing a grey skirt and a white button down top, sitting on some boxes staring blankly into space and rocking back and forth. She’s quickly confronted by Holly, wearing ripped up jeans and a flannel shirt. HOLLY Aren’t you gonna give me congrats? MORGAN (softly) For what? HOLLY For what? For what I did to Barbie last week. MORGAN Jade? HOLLY That was nothing. I’ve done that routine a million times, but it always feels good afterwards. You were out there you saw what I can do? Don’t it make you kind of scared? I mean, I’ve hurt girls bigger than you like it was nothing, and I did it with a smile on my face. How about you? You ever hurt anybody? MORGAN (softly) I’ve done some things. HOLLY What type of things? MORGAN (softly) Bad things. HOLLY As bad as me? Because I’m one bad bitch. For whatever reason this comment causes Morgan to raise her head and her tone in an angered speech. MORGAN You’re one bad bitch? Is that what you think you are? You tell yourself that? HOLLY I don’t have to tell myself. Others tell it to me, as I’m crushing their windpipe with my boot. MORGAN You’re not bad. You’re nothing close to bad. You have life with a husband, and a family, and a nice house in Las Vegas. I would kill for your life. If I had a soul I would sell it to anybody for your life. You have normalcy and health and people who love you. You’re not bad, you’re just a ungrateful mean spirited bitch! That’s what you are. You don’t know anything about bad HOLLY Look, little girl, I know bad a hell of a lot better than you. Bad don’t recognize you, but its on a first name basis with me. MORGAN Come live my life, and do the things that I’ve done and tell me that you’re bad. Morgan gathers up her women’s title and departs. Holly merely nods her head and smiles to herself. COMING UP NEXT ANGLEMANIA REMATCH KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN VS MISTER DICK NEXT IN OUR MAINEVENT COMMERCIAL

As we return from commercial the entrance stage fills with gold smoke and purple light as Fedde Le Grand's “Creeps” blares through the speakers. COLE Welcome back to OAOAST HeldDOWN~! BUFFER The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, hailing from Port Au Prince, Haiti, the minions of the underworld… DIVINE BROTHERS UNO and DOS... LOS CONQUISADOOOOOORRRRRRRSSSSSSS!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Dos drops to his knees and chants to his strange and mysterious gods while Uno stands behind him, arms outstretched chanting the same prayer. COLE You know Halloween’s near because Los Conquistadors have come out to play. COACH According to the gossip spewed daily on the OAOAST HOT NEWZLINE, Los Conquistadors like to go trick or treating in the cemetery. COLE “Scream” by Chris Cornell hits and Molly Nerdly leads the Orange County Cobras ringside. BUFFER And their opponents, accompanied by MOLLY NERDLY! From the O.C., total combine weight 460 pounds, the 2009 Anderson Cup champions… SIMON SINGLETON and NED BLANCHARD... THE ORANGE COUNTY COOOOBRAS!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Molly continues the hand slapping while Simon and Ned get ready for business inside. COLE The Orange County Cobras a little over a week away from their big encounter with the Mardi Gras Hellfire Club. And like Simon Singleton said last week, Coach, the Hellfire Club will have to put up or shut up. COACH I, for one, still can’t believe they’re crying over spilled milk, Cole. Zero Hour was weeks ago. Besides, the Hellfire Club offered to bury the hatchet but Simon and Ned wanted no part of that. Don’t they realize we’re back to being a kinder, gentler America? * DINGDINGDING * Simon and Uno lockup and Simon executes an arm-wringer, then delivers a series of knife-edge chops. He rams Uno into the buckle and tags Ned. Irish whip leads to a back elbow from the Handsome Hustler, followed by a knee off the ropes. Ned slams Uno and tags out, slinging Simon inside for a big splash! The cover. ONE! TWO! NO! Dos makes the save, raking Simon’s eyes! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Uno rams Simon into the knee of Dos. A tag follows and Los Conquistadors deliver a double clothesline. The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Dos dumps Simon outside, then baits Ned in so Uno can do a number on Simon behind the referee‘s back! COLE Turn around, ref! Dos rolls Simon back in and heads up top, but Simon pops to his feet and slams him! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" COACH Bad mistake by Dos. He got cute instead of keeping it simple. The O.C. Cobras tag and Ned takes on both Conquistadors. Following a pair of scoop slams Ned whips Dos for a BAAAAAAACK body drop, then ducks a clothesline from Uno and knocks him outside with one of his own! COLE Ned dominating in the ring. SLINGSHOT SUPLEX leads to a tag and the O.C. Cobras drop THE ATOMIC BLOND!!! The cover. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! * DINGDINGDING * “Scream” cues as we get the official announcement. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, here are your winners… SIMON SINGLETON and NED BLANCHARD... THE ORANGE COUNTY COOOOBRAS!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Molly raises the hands of Simon and Ned. COLE You know Simon and Ned are ready for next week. Will the Mardi Gras Hellfire Club be up for the challenge? We’ll find out at the Halloween Spectacular.

Outside in the parking lot Maggie Nerdly stands on hand with The Heavenly Rockers and Abdullah Abir Nerdly in front of their tour bus which is painted with their wild logo. MAGGIE What’s poppin, everyone? Its me The “It” Girl on the scene with three baaaaaad dudes, The Heavenly Rockers and Abdullah Abir Nerdly. Guys, ya’ll just found out its going to be a cage match between you and D*LUX at Halloween Spectacular. ABDULLAH Praise to the one who created this match! He is a servant of god, and he has gifted us handsomely! SYNTH Right on, your holiness, this the shit we been lookin’ for all along! Ain’t no teenage spoiled brats running up in our shiz, its just us and those two Idol dropouts. That’s how we like it, baby! Ya'll dudes is deader than Abe Lincoln and James Brown put together. Ya'll is done for! ABDULLAH Yes, yes! It will be a glorious day, my children! May we all look forward to this blessed event, of the well justified massacre of D*LUX. Enemies of the holy word and holy Rockers are they, and they must suffer due consequence! LOGAN Right, right. Suffer, I like that word. Maggie, you have to understand something. Yes, we’re rock n wrestling legends, but at the very core we’re animals. We hunger. Hunger for blood. This time we’re hungering for the blood of D*LUX. We want them to paint the canvas red. We’ve been waiting for this moment for a long, long time. This is what we live for. The hunt and the kill. D*LUX, we’ve had you in our sights a long time. Now we're coming for your blood! TONIGHT'S MAINEVENT ANGLEMANIA REMATCH KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN VS MISTER DICK TONIGHT COMMERCIAL

Anybody???

Outside in the parking lot Maggie Nerdly stands on hand with The Heavenly Rockers and Abdullah Abir Nerdly. MAGGIE What’s poppin, everyone? Its me The “It” Girl on the scene with three baaaaaad dudes, The Heavenly Rockers and Abdullah Abir Nerdly. Guys, ya’ll just found out its going to be a cage match between you and D*LUX at Halloween Spectacular. ABDULLAH Praise to the one who created this match! He is a servant of god, and he has gifted us handsomely! SYNTH Right on, your holiness, this the shit we been lookin’ for all along! Ain’t no teenage spoiled brats running up in our shiz, its just us and those two Idol dropouts. That’s how we like it, baby! Ya'll dudes is deader than Abe Lincoln and James Brown put together. Ya'll is done for! ABDULLAH Yes, yes! It will be a glorious day, my children! May we all look forward to this blessed event, of the well justified massacre of D*LUX. Enemies of the holy word and holy Rockers are they, and they must suffer due consequence! LOGAN Right, right. Suffer, I like that word. Maggie, you have to understand something. Yes, we’re rock n wrestling legends, but at the very core we’re animals. We hunger. Hunger for blood. This time we’re hungering for the blood of D*LUX. We want them to paint the canvas red. We’ve been waiting for this moment for a long, long time. This is what we live for. The hunt and the kill. D*LUX, we’ve had you in our sights a long time. Now we're coming for your blood!

Won't somebody save my show!!!!!!?????

As promised, your mainevent Krista Vs Mister Dick!

All in all a decent show.

Ideally Tuesday or Wednesday would be a good time to post it, but I can do Thursday. The Nerdly Challenge Series continues!

COLE Welco....hang on Coach... apparantly... apparantly there's some sort of a commotion going on backstage, can we get a camera back there? We can, as backstage we find LEON RODEZ, swinging a trash can repeatedly at the body of one of Los Diablos De Fuego! COLE That's Leon Rodez! And he is just beating the HELL out of Los Diablos, what is going on here! COACH It's retribution Michael. Retribution for what happened earlier. As Mariachi is beaten to a pulp, Moracca returns and tries to save his tag team partner, latching onto Leon from behind. Dropping the trash can Leon manages to shrug Moracca off of him and then lays him out with a hard right hand. Leon seethes as he stomps away on Moracca, before throwing aside the trash can and grabbing hold of Mariachi. Gripping onto the mask, Rodez drags Mariachi up and starts to cart him off towards a black curtain in the distance, which from the increasing noise seems to lead into to the arena. COLE Leon Rodez has snapped here and it looks like he's bringing Mariachi, who can barely even stand under his own power, out our way! Letting Mariachi go, a clubbing blow to the back sends the pink luchador stumbling through the curtains and out by the side of the stage. The crowd suddenly find themselves closer to the action than they could have imagined, as Leon retrieves Mariachi and hurls him into the boards at the bottom of that section, before stomping away again. COLE This is just out of control. Leon Rodez is beating this poor guy mercilessly! COACH Well these fruity idiots brought it on themselves Michael. I got no sympathy. COLE Coach, this is crossing the line. Los Diablos were just trying to have some fun. They never meant to do any harm and I'm sure they never meant to scare Morgan the way they did. It's not their fault she has issues. They don't deserve this. Leon drags Mariachi to the ramp, clubbing him across the head as they go. He throws the luchador up onto the steel and climbs up after him, mounting and laying in some punches as the crowd hurl abuse his way. COLE Somebody needs to get out here and stop this! By the mask again Leon drags Mariachi down the aisle, throwing him into the rail at the side. Mariachi slumps down, holding his ribs. Not done yet though Leon drags the Mexican up again, throwing him towards the ring. As Mariachi is dumped inside, Moracca suddenly re-appears and the crowd cheer as he limps to the ring. COLE Here comes Moracca to try and protect his friend... but, I don't know what good he's going to be able to do, he looks hurt too. As Leon slides in and puts the boots to Mariachi again, Moracca climbs to the apron. Grabbing the top rope he slings himself over, landing on Leon's back with a rear naked choke! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" The fans cheer, but Leon is in no real danger and hurls Moracca up over his head with a thud. COLE And finally, we're getting some officials out here to stop this! Referee eventually hit the ring, putting a stop to Rodez's attack as he stomps down on both Diablos. As the bodies start to get in his way Leon lurches away and slides outside, grabbing a microphone amidst a sea of boos. LEON You want to put a stop to this? Fine! Ring the bell! COLE What? LEON One of you make this official and ring the bell. I'll take them both on. I don't care. But I'm not leaving. Get Josie. Get Anglesault. Get whoever you need to get. The referees, en masse, wave this idea off and continue to point Leon off to the back. LEON If one of you doesn't call for that bell, then you will regret it. The only reason I'm out here alone is me. So either someone rings the bell and starts a match, or I say the word and Morgan deals with this problem herself. Your call. COACH And we all know what Morgan'll do to these referees Michael! Toasted zebra! Apparantly the referees start feeling a little more co-operative, as they try to figure out what to do. Referee Mike Chioda can be seen listening through his earpiece as the other officials continue to keep Leon from doing any more damage. Until, suddenly, Chioda starts asking Los Diablos if they're okay to compete. "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" Leon scowls, waiting for something to happen. Despite being down and hurt, Los Diablos seem to be responding. And Chioda starts motioning his fellow officials out and calls for a bell! *DINGDINGDING* COLE I don't believe this. We're having a handicap match? Right now? As the referees leave Chioda behind, Leon slides back in and goes back on the attack of the gutsy but helpless Diablos. Rodez places his foot on Moracca's throat and chokes him, before going over and stomping Mariachi. COLE Los Diablos are in no condition to have a match here, I don't care if it is two on one. COACH Well, it's one on two right now. Leon picks Moracca back up and throws him into a corner. Attacking with punches and kicks he leaves him slumped against the bottom turnbuckle. Mariachi fights back to his feet and tries to help. But he walks right into Leon. A knee doubles Mariachi up, setting him up for an Exploder Suplex, INTO THE CORNER, LANDING ON HIS OWN PARTNER!!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!!" Standing over Los Diablos, Leon's eyes narrow. COACH I think Los Diablos might think twice about who's expense they have their fun at in the future. Infact, they're lucky this is all the punishment they're going to get, messing with Morgan. Rodez drags Mariachi back up. Unable to fight back, the luchador is pulled onto one knee and grabbed behind the head. With a scowl on his face Leon then starts firing knees, repeatedly, smashing the masked skull of Mariachi from side to side. After that brutal beating, Leon then steps back... and unleashes the rolling sobat to the face, knocking him clean out!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Ugh! The One Hit Kill, that devestating kick to the face! Looking down at Mariachi, Leon turns his attentions to Moracca who is trying to pull himself up in the corner. With two handfuls of mask Rodez starts bouncing the back of his head off of the turnbuckle. Moracca's body goes limp and Leon steps away. Waiting for Moracca to stumble out, he fires another rolling sobat, this time to the gut. Moracca falls to all fours and is forced to the ground, Rodez grabbing hold of the legs and putting him in the LIONTAMER! And Moracca wastes no time in submitting. *DINGDINGDING* COLE Well Leon has won this 'match', but that's not the story here. And now, he refuses to break the hold! Come on referee! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Rodez keeps Moracca in the Liontamer, the luchador screaming in pain underneath him. Not listening to the referee he tortures Moracca until he's satisfied he's done enough, at which point he throws Moracca's legs to the ground and stalks the referee out of the ring. Meanwhile, the cameras pan up the aisle, to find a troubled Morgan Nerdly making her way out. COLE Oh no... now what? Now what are they going do!? Dishing out some more stomps, Leon keeps Los Diablos down as Morgan slides in. Looking at the two pink devils she sits against the bottom rope, nervously chewing her bottom lip for a second, until she's sure they're both incapacitated by Leon's stomps. Calling Morgan over, Leon holds Mariachi up off the mat, almost like he's offering food to a wild animal. And Morgan stares for a few seconds, before letting out a scream and lunging at the helpless luchador. COACH Oh yeah! She's gonna claw him to shreads Michael! COLE It's not the clawing I'm worried about... WAIT A MINUTE! Suddenly, the crowd cheer as ALIX MARIA SPEZIA dives into the ring. She tackles Morgan off of Mariachi and pins her down... but before she can do any more, Leon runs up behind and boots her in the back of the head! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh, Alix got caught! And now the pack of wolves have a new target! Leon and Morgan stomp away at Alix, until KRISTA hits the ring swinging like a wild-woman!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE HERE WE GO! It's chaos in the aisle as Krista and Leon go at it, scrapping around on the mat in a frenzy. They trade short punches, short knees, whatever they can land while rolling around the ring. Morgan stands and watches, unsure of what to do, when back-up arrives in the form of THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS. Flanked by Holly, Logan and Synth climb into the ring and head towards Leon and Krista. The World Champion and #1 Contender battle by the turnbuckles, out of the way... ...and that's when Logan and Synth turn their attentions to Morgan. COLE ...what the... COACH Oh my God, they've got Morgan trapped! Morgan's eyes widen as she finds herself unexpectedly surrounded by the former World Tag Team Champions. And with Holly standing right behind her, waiting for the Women's Champion to make a move. While this is going on though, Leon manages to fight off Krista, bumping her outside. He looks up and seeing Morgan in danger, he rushes over, JUST as Logan and Synth are about to grab a hold of her! COACH Woah! COLE And look at the face-off, Leon Rodez and The Heavenly Rockers! They were after Morgan, but they might have made a huge mistake! Leon glares the same cold, evil glare at Logan and Synth that he did Los Diablos and it's all set to explode, when more bodies hit the ring, this time D*LUX!!! Shayne and Tyler slide in and tackle Synth and Logan down, leaving Leon standing in the middle confused as hell. COLE This is CHAOS! Who's side is who on, I can't keep track of this! With D*LUX and The Heavenly Rockers brawling to the floor, Leon is pounced on by Krista... and Morgan is pounced on by Holly, all hell breaking loose with four seperate fights in and around the ring! The women's champion and her number one contender scrap on the mat, the world champion and her number one contender battling it out in a corner, while D*LUX and The Heavenly Rockers spill into the crowd swinging fists. COLE What a chaotic scene here on HeldDOWN, we need to get some order restored here! Thank you for joining us, we will see you next week, goodbye from a tumultuous HeldDOWN!!! FADE OUT.

PRESENTED IN HD FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY -OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT- New song! New song! We come to the OAOAST Arena Where Michael Cole and Johnathan Coachman sit at a desk decorated with various Halloween props such as pumpkins, orange and black streamers, and standups of mummies and vampires. COLE Welcome to Houston, Texas everybody, sight of this week's HeldDOWN~! The action promises to be hot this week as we head into Halloween Spectacular! And we open things up with a big time match between Holly and Jade Rodez-Duncan! The cameras pan back, revealing the OAOAST Women's Champion Morgan Nerdly settling into the guest commentator's chair. Not so much settling, as nestling into it. Tucking her knees up to her chest, she puts the headset on and sits sadly staring ahead, curled up. COLE And as you can see, we're being joined here for this opening contest by our Women's Champion, who will be scouting her next challenger come the Halloween Spectacular. Morgan, thanks for joining us. MORGAN (softly) You're welcome. Not getting much conversation, Michael just shrugs to Coach. "Now I'm that BITCH Now I'm that BITCH Now I'm that BITCH Now I'm that BITCH" The OAOAST mash-up machine gets another workout as Livi Franc’s "Now I’m That Bitch" turns into Faith No More’s "Another Body Murdered" as red, gold, and orange spotlights flood the arena. With a permanent scowl fixed on her face, Holly stomps her black combat boots through the entrance. And she scowls. The Heavenly Rockers follow Holly out, with Abdullah there to help keep a volatile Logan in check. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first. Accompanied to the ring by the only rock n' wrestling band that matters, THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS... and "The Speaker For The Prophets" ABDULLAH ABIR NERDLY. From Las Vegas, Nevada. She is "THE ANGEL OF DEATH"... HHHOOOOOOOOLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYY!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Holly climbs up the ring steps and into the ring, fixing her scowl now on Morgan. A smirk breaks through the smile and Holly makes a belt motion. With The Heavenly Rockers and Abdullah making their way around the ring, Morgan shies even deeper into her chair. COLE Holly trying to intimidate our guest here. They will do battle at the Halloween Spectacular on October 31st. Morgan remains unnervingly quiet, looking up at Holly pounding her palm threateningly with her fist. "Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy) And you don’t care what they say See, every time you turn around They screamin' your name Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy) And you don’t care what they say See, every time you turn around They screamin' your name" The lights flash purple and often as "When I Grow Up" by The Pussycat Dolls hits to excited cheers. Bounding out onto the stage Jade gets swept up in the excitement and plays to the crowd. Which, unbeknownest to her, Maya mocks behind her back. A slightly embarrassed Jade subtely warns Maya she'll pay for that later, while showing off the famous Duncan "fixed smile to the crowd" as she, Maya and D*LUX head to the ring. BUFFER And introducing her opponent! Accompanied by D*LUX and her co-manager sister, MAYA DUNCAN-BLANCHARD!! She hails from Los Angeles, California... "LITTLE MISS CALIFORNIA"... JJJAAAAAADDEE... RRROOOOOODDEEEEEZZZZZZZ - DDUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAANN!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" As Jade skips down to the ring, Morgan looks on with disgust. COLE Two former Women's Champions doing battle here in our opening contest on HeldDOWN. And both women well supported here tonight... COACH Woah momma yeah! COLE ...by their respective tag teams, D*LUX and The Heavenly Rockers. COACH Oh. Right. Jade and Holly square up in the middle of the ring, Holly quickly putting a downer on Jade's good mood. The referee separates them and Holly motions to Morgan to watch closely. *DINGDINGDING* As Holly and Jade circle, D*LUX get the Texans in attendance clapping. Logan flips out, screaming for some quiet (irony, see), and has to be calmed down by Synth and Abdullah Abir. COLE There goes Logan again. That man has some serious anger issue... oh... Michael looks nervously to his right, where Morgan glances his way. COLE Let's just concentrate on the match, shall we. COACH Please do Michael. Please. Jade and Holly lock up, jockeying for position. Using her superior power Holly manages to back Jade up against the turnbuckles, drawing in the referee to call for a clean break. Holly looks like she's going to co-operate for a second, but then shoves the ref aside and slams her combat boot into Jade's midsection. More stomps work Jade down into the corner and Holly walks away with a smirk on her face. COLE Holly, one of the most ruthless women in the OAOAST. She just likes hurting people. Simple as that. Walking back over Holly grabs a hold of Jade's blond hair, jerking her head back cruelly. After getting a look at Jade's fearful eyes, Holly then takes Jade out of the corner, whipping her over with a hairmare! Jade sits up holding her back, allowing Holly to take aim with a stomp to the spine. Cheered on by an over-excited Logan, Holly then places Jade in a painful camel clutch type move, only relying on another pull of the hair. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" Holly lets Jade go, noticing Morgan's eyes intently fixed on her. She stares back and then pulls back on the hair of Jade again. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" Another break just in time from Holly, who applies a legal chinlock. COLE Holly doesn't seem to be too concerned about facing you Morgan, despite your track record. Infact, she demanded this match at the Halloween Spectacular. MORGAN People shouldn't cross me, Michael. They... they just shouldn't do it... I... Morgan, troublingly, trails off. Meanwhile, Jade fights back to her feet and starts fighting out of the chinlock, only to take a knee to her ribs. A clubbing blow to the back knocks Jade down to her knees and her little sister, now feeling worried, tries to encourage her. Jade is knocked back down by another shot though, Holly in total control. COACH Jade's getting taught a lesson here. Holly's the original woman ass-kicker of the OAOAST. Backing off the ropes, Holly takes aim and throws a boot at Jade's head... but Jade manages to sneak out of the way and roll Holly up with a schoolgirl! 1... 2... No! Quickly back up Holly boots Jade in the stomach again and regains control. COLE Holly shouldn't be concerned with our guest tonight though. Jade was Women's Champion for seven months. She's not someone you want to overlook. COACH Yeah and who was it that beat her? Our guest, Morgan Nerdly! Infact she may even be a better Women's Champion! Please don't hurt me! Holly throws Jade face first into the turnbuckles and starts burying more boots into the stomach. A blatant choke then has to be broken up by the referee. Complying, Holly backs away into the opposite corner of the ring, waiting for Jade to resurface. Once Jade is back up Holly then comes charging, leaping in looking for an avalanche, only for Jade to move out of the way! "YYAAAAAAAAAAAAAYY!!" Hope returns to the crowd and to D*LUX, as Jade grits her teeth and starts firing back on Holly with repeated forearm smashes in the corner. An irish whip sends Holly across the ring and Jade follows, leaping at The Angel Of Death and flipping her overhead with a monkey flip! COLE Jade fighting back, how many times have we talked about the heart and determination of this young girl? Firing up Jade runs at Holly with a clothesline and goes for a cover... 1... 2... No! Jade waves Holly back to her feet and goes to hit the ropes, but is suddenly brought to a stop when ABDULLAH ABIR grabs her wrestling shoe from the outside! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Hey, come on! The crowd hiss their displeasure, as Holly capitalises on the distraction, kneeing Jade in the back and sending him sprawling through the ropes to the arena floor. Jade lays in a heap in front of The Heavenly Rockers and Abdullah, prompting D*LUX and Maya to run over and protect her. The referee quickly jumps out between the warring tag teams before anything can happen, ordering everyone back to their corners. COLE What a big man that adopted brother of yours is, interfering against woman and then hiding behind his friends when somebody confronts him. MORGAN My family are cowards. All of them. Holly leaves the ring to dump Jade back inside, as order is restored. She forces Jade away from the ropes and quickly goes for the cover... 1... 2... No! Holly applies an abdominal stretch on the seated Jade, cruelly digging her elbow into Jade's exposed ribs, causing her to squeal in pain. COLE I have to ask, Morgan, are you worried about Holly? Or are you looking forward to the Halloween Spectacular. MORGAN I... really don't like this time of year. COLE ...I see. The Houston fans are whipped up by D*LUX and Maya and start to encourage Jade back to her feet. With her arm still being tugged on, Jade gets back up, but still finds herself in an uncomfortable position and is kneed in the side before she can do anything. Holly clubs Jade in the back a couple more times, before hitting the ropes and carrying herself back with a Spear! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Holly traps Jade in the hold again, demanding she submit. "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" COLE Holly has really worked over Jade's ribs, you can see her struggling for every breath. MORGAN (inquisitively) Why do these people like her? COLE Uhm... well, she's a nice girl and a gutsy competitor. Jade starts to fight back up again, but Morgan remains unimpressed. MORGAN (angrier) Why... do these people like her!? COLE I... I don't know. MORGAN She's just like all of them. She's the same. They're all the same. All of them! Morgan takes her headset off and throws it onto the table, staring at the ring with wide-eyes. The commentators look at each other nervously and try to move on. Elbowing her way out of Holly grip, Jade starts firing away with forearms again. And she starts rocking Holly, staggering her up against the ropes. With Holly good and dazed, Jade turns on her heels and runs to the ropes. Holly steps off the ropes, but walks into a front dropkick to the chest! The force rolls Holly back to her feet, now winded herself. Pulling herself back up, Jade hits the ropes again and dishes out a second front dropkick. JADE COME OOOOONN!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" Determination back, Jade hits the ropes one more time, only for Holly to step to the side and leave Jade to hit the mat empty-handed. "OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Ouch. Holly, too smart for that. As Jade gets back up, Holly scoops her off her feet and delivers a sidewalk slam, hooking the leg... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Only two, as Morgan Nerdly continues to look on. COACH Not exactly a high energy guest, was she? COLE I think she has some things on her mind. And I don't wish to know what they are. Holly brings Jade back to her feet and calling for the finish, she underhooks the arms, ready for the Angel's Wings. Fighting it with all she has left Jade is able to block though and eventually counter, backdropping Holly overhead! A cheer goes up, but Jade falls to a knee and it's clear she's still hurt. Despite the pain though, she manages to run the ropes and catches Holly standing back up, hooking her with the SWEET DREAMS!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" Hook of the leg by Jade... 1... 2... NO! COLE So close for Jade, what an effort this is turning into from her, as the number one contender's momentum is starting to slip away! Weary as she is, Jade is still gutsy and encourages Holly to get back up. When she does Jade is waiting. Jade paws her with an open left hand. Then paws her with an open right. With a guttural shout, Jade then pulls a 360... but Holly ducks the clothesline and lifts Jade up into a fireman's carry. COLE Uh-oh! Got caught! Holly carries Jade into the middle of the ring and throws her forward, right across the knee with a gutbuster!! COLE OH, right back to the ribs! COACH Here it comes Michael, Holly's signalling for the end. All the wind knocked out of her, Jade is left unable to stand, completely doubled over in pain. Holly quickly hooks the head, then the leg, before twisting violently and dumping Jade on her neck with the Rodeo Driver! Tyler and Shayne wince on the arena floor and are then knocked to the ground, as Logan and Synth pounce from behind! COLE Come on, there's no need for that! COACH Got to stop them interfering and breaking the count. COLE D*LUX were going to do no such thing! Holly smirks as she sees Maya run away in fear, then fixes her smirk on Morgan as she forces Jade's shoulders to the mat... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING* COLE And Holly picks up the win, as she looks ahead to the Halloween Spectacular. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the match... HHOOOOOOOOOLLLLYYYYYYYYY!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Holly shoves Jade aside and walks across the ring, making sure Morgan gets a good look at her hand being raised in victory. Chewing on her hair, Morgan's eyes gaze vacantly up at The Angel Of Death as she stands victorious. Meanwhile, Logan and Synth get in a few last stomps on Tyler and Shayne, happy with their work as well. COACH I tell you what, I wouldn't cross Morgan with a loaded shotgun. But if I were her, I'd be real worried right now. More worried than usual. Because Holly looks uber-dangerous right about now. COLE She'll get her shot in just over two weeks and lord only knows what's going to happen in that one. And look at The Heavenly Rockers, smiles on their faces. They look like they just won a match, nevermind Holly, after that unprovoked attack on Tyler and Shayne. COACH They were about to make a move into the ring, I swear it. With a smug expression on her face Holly leaves the ring, joining in the celebrations with Logan and Synth at ringside. Maya is left standing at ringside, looking on sadly as her big sis' and her teenage tag crushes all lay hurt in and around the ring. And at the announce table, Morgan shifts uncomfortably in her chair. COLE Well, we'd like to thank Morgan for joining us... but... maybe now's not a good time.

COLE Well, moving on, earlier this week, budding film student Molly Nerdly followed a... well, an 'interesting' subject, Biff Atlas. Let's take a look. BIFF ATLAS: THE HERO WITHIN? A maybe or maybe not heroic story By Molly Nerdly Watching this footage back on a TV monitor, Biff Atlas sits in deep thought. Molly's hand reaches and turns off the monitor and Biff snaps back to life. MOLLY (off-screen) So, watching that back... what do you feel? BIFF I feel... empowered. I mean, I didn't believe it at first myself. But the signs are all there. There have been just too many coincidences. Before, I was weak. Afraid. Cursed by luck. When I think back to those times, all those injuries I suffered in the ring. My foot seemed magnetically attracted to every crack and raised edge in the pavement. Papercuts would leave me bed-ridden for days on end. And now... I mean, the car, the fall from the ring, the scaffold... what other explanation can there be? I must have been blessed. MOLLY (off-screen) So, you believe that you have these powers, but you don't actually know what they are? BIFF Not yet. But when I finally do find out, then and only then can I really come to terms with the fate that has befallen me and try to discover my true purpose in life! MOLLY (off-screen) *clears throat* ...uhm, right, okay. Anyway. You want me to catch this on film, so you can be sure. What exactly have you got in mind? ~~~TEST 1: SHAPESHIFTING~~~ Stood outside of a women's bathroom, Biff Atlas holds an 8 by 10 picture of Mister Dick in his hand. A signed picture. So he's already $20 down. BIFF Okay, my theory is, that instead of it being speed or power that saved me, perhaps I merely morphed into something that could survive those situations. So I'm going to try it. I saw Malaysia go into here. If I look at this picture hard enough and concentrate hard enough, like I must have been concentrating during that fall off the scaffold, I can morph into Mister Dick and surprise her. Biff locks eyes with the pictures and starts to concentrate. Hard. MOLLY (off-screen) Wait... what do you mean "I must have been concentrating"? Surely if you were concentrating, you'd know? Biff, now shaking, suddenly drops the picture. He turns to Molly and slicks back his hair. BIFF (southern drawl) Cram it already! Or else, I'll cram it for ya, with my giant hunk of man meat, ya hear? Dumb broad! Grabbing his not-quite so impressive man meat, Biff struts into the women's bathroom. For a moment, there's silence. Before, suddenly, a loud tinny thud. And then screams. *LASH* "AAAHHHH!" *LASH* "AAAHHHH!" *LASH* "AAAHHHH! That's the good stuff baby, give it to The Dickman!" *LASH* "AAAHHHH!" ... *FLUSH* MOLLY (off-screen) Oh dear. ~~~TEST 2: REGENERATION~~~ With his hair looking suspiciously wet and ruffled all of a sudden, Biff perseveres on. Now, in the parking lot BIFF Okay. It occurs to me now that I can still feel pain. MOLLY (off-screen) Mmm-hmm. BIFF And yet, I seem to suffer no long-lasting damage. Infact, I'll bet that if I slam my fist through this car window, I won't even leave a scar. Opening the driver door, Biff takes aim. MOLLY (off-screen) Are you sure about this? BIFF Trust me. MOLLY (off-screen) WAIT... Biff stops just short of punching the window, as Molly pulls up his shirt, revealing marks from where he'd been whipped. MOLLY (off-screen) You've already got scars! BIFF Where? Let me see! Biff arches his head around, trying to look over his shoulder at his own back. Sadly, he forgets about the car door. A passer-by accidently nudges it and it slams shut, trapping his arm with a thud. BIFF MOLLY (off-screen) Oh my goodness, are you okay! BIFF ...AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH... ~~~TEST 3: RESISTANCE TO ELECTRICITY~~~ As Morgan Nerdly stands patiently in line for coffee, Biff Atlas walks up behind her, tapping her on the shoulder with his heavily bandaged arm. BIFF Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you are very undersized and not at all attractive. So, saying that, I thi... *ZZZAAAAAAAAPPP* BIFF ......BBLAAAARRGHGHAAHAGAHAGRRRHGHGHAAA!!!!! Zapped, Biff lays on the floor quivering. MOLLY (off-screen) What does that even have to do with falling off a scaffold and surviving? BIFF (in immense pain) I... don't... know. ~~~TEST 4: MAGNETISM MANIPULATION~~~ Movely very gingerly, Biff sits, flipping a coin. MOLLY (off-screen) So, I take it you've given up finally? Not a moment too soon. BIFF Given up!? Are you crazy!? Call. MOLLY (off-screen) Oh, uhm... BIFF Tails! Biff lets the coin hit the ground and it indeed comes up tails. BIFF That's the answer! I can control magnetic fields. Think about it. The car was metal. The scaffold was metal. MOLLY (off-screen) What about the car door thou... BIFF Tails! ...YES! As Biff goes to pick up the coin, he feels a twinge from the punishment he's taken. Molly picks it up for him, but then happens to inspect the coin. MOLLY (off-screen) Biff, this is a two-sided coin. The reason you keep guessing right is because both sides are tails and that's what you keep calling. BIFF Did I do that? MOLLY (off-screen) No! Suddenly, Officer Bosley walks up. BOSLEY HEY! Gimme back my coin punk! I need this to get girlies outta their clothes! Dumb bitches always call heads. BIFF Tell you what, I'll flip you for it. BOSLEY Okay, you call. Biff's eyes light up. BIFF Haha! TAILS! Bosley flips the coin... right into Biff's eye. BIFF .....AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!! I'M BLIND!! Picking up his coin, Bosley strolls off, leaving a blinded Biff behind. ~~~TEST 5: TELEKA...OH WHAT'S THE POINT?~~~ Sulking, Biff sits and takes a sip of water, before adjusting his eyepatch. MOLLY (off-screen) And so, no closer to discovering his true superpower, or whether he even has any at all... or even if he is at the level of a normal human being, let alone a gifted one... Biff Atlas must continue to struggle with the dreams of grandeur and a lack of understanding for the concept of pure, dumb luck. This is Molly Nerdly, reporting. BIFF Is the number you're thinking of... fourty two? MOLLY (off-screen) No Biff. No. BIFF Damn. COMMERCIAL

"Clean shirt New shoes And I dont know where I am goin to. Silk suit Black tie, I dont need a reason why. They come runnin just as fast as they can Coz every girl crazy bout a sharp dressed man." A large chorous of boos fill the air and brings the disliked duo of Christian Wright and Lorelei DeCenzo sliding through the entrance doors. Both are dressed as sharply as the song indicates with Wright in pleated khaki pants and a cashmere blazer, and Lorelei in a sparkling strapless evening gown with one leg cut out. Together they hold hands and turn their nose up at the Texas fans. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall. Introducing first... representing THE ENTERPRISE! He is accompanied by Lorelei DeCenzo Now residing in Washington D.C. He weighs in at approximately '8 and 1/3 BARS OF GOLD'... The Financial Analyst of The Enterprise, this is "THE NATURAL"... CCHHHRRRIIISSTTIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAANN... WWWWRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGHHHHHHTT!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE The Natural all set to meet J-MAX here on OAOAST HeldDOWN live from Houston, Texas! Wright hands his valued briefcase to Lorelei for safe keeping. He rounds across the ring, leaping up to the apron and sliding down to the turnbuckles. Removing his suit, he climbs atop the turnbuckles with one foot on the second and another on the third. There he makes the money fingers to boos from the crowd. Witness by Roots Manuva hits and a nice pop comes from the Texas fans. The entrance doors shoot apart and J-MAX hops his way into the stage. He turns to the video screens blaring his image, and points to them with a confident swagger. BUFFER And his opponent for Birmingham, England, he weighs 181 pounds…..he is J-MAAAAAAAXXXXXX! J-MAX raises his hands in salute to a cheering audience as he bops his way down the lighted floor panels of entrance stage COLE Both these men lost their beat the clock challenges and both looking for a big win here tonight. DING DING DING The two competitors immediately go for a lockup, which unsurpingly doesn’t go J-MAX’s way. The Natural powers out the hold and forces his smaller foe into a side headlock. The young Brit tries to force his way out the hold, but finds only failure as CW rolls him over onto the canvas. There J-MAX again tries to push his way past CW’s grip. However, the Natural bridges upwards and makes this quite a hard task. “BOOOOOOOOOO!” CW brings J-MAX to his feet, hoping that standing up will give him more levrage to cause his foe pain. But this has the nasty side effect of allowing J-MAX to pepper him in the side with punches. Eventually Wright’s grip is weakened and the masked star is able to shove him into the ropes. As CW returns he’s nailed in the face from a twisting dropkick by J-MAX! COLE You have got to love the amazing offense J-MAX brings to the table everytime out. COACH Christian Wright ain’t loving it right now. CW is back to his feet with some speed. But he’s met with the striking boots of his foe. Weakening CW with those kicks, J-MAX attempts to irish whip him into the corner posts. But CW avoids this, by reversing the hold. He charges in after J-MAX. But the agile European flips entirely over his body. As the fans marvel at J-MAX’s agility, The Natural crashes his shoulder into the ring posts. “YEAAAAAAAAAA!” Wright stumbles out the corner, face full of rage and seeking revenge. But its J-MAX who continues the attack, nailing his foe in the skull with a pele kick! A pinfall follows… ONE! TWO! CW pushes out the pinfall. The Natural immediately rolls to his feet and seeks the comfort of the ring ropes for support. This does please J-MAX who motions for him to return to the fight. When CW refuses the invitation J-MAX brings the fight to him with a running senton splash into the Natural! The fans are wholly impressed by J-MAX who lands easily onto his feet. Wright, however, is not as he staggers from the ring posts. While he tries to recollect his thoughts and strategies, J-MAX takes off to the ropes. Unfortunately for him the always sexy Lorelei DeCenzo grabs onto his foot and trips him up. This allows Wright to sneak up on him and crash him to the canvas with a European Uppercut! “BOOOOOOOO!” “SILENCE!” Wright shrieks at the OAOAST Marks. CW then drops on top of J-MAX and tags him in the face with a series of elbow strikes. He finally pulls J-MAX to his feet, but does so only to pulverize his chest with a short arm lariat. Thinking his rival to have been defeated by his strikes, CW attempts a pin… ONE! TWO! J-MAX pops out the pinfall, earning a nice cheer from the capacity crowd. COLE Lots of toughness in J-MAX. COACH Is that why he ran away like a bitch when The Rockers were sonning him? Because he’s tough. Frustrated with himself and his foe, an angered Wright locks J-MAX into a reverse chinlock. The fans get on J-MAX’s side which gives him the strength he needs to mount an early escape attempt. Wright’s hold hangs tight at first, but as the chants increase in volume and J-MAX increases the strength of his struggles, CW is forced to his feet. There his hold is broken by J-MAX, who takes off to the ropes. This time there’s no Lorelei to intefere. But Lorelei would be infinitely preferable to the move J-MAX is struck with as Wright nails him with the Wright Off! The referee counts the ensuing pinfall… ONE! TWO! J-MAX kicks out, and is promptly brought to his feet by The Natural. The two trade strikes before J-MAX is able to secure the upperhand with a spinning roundhouse directly into the side of Wright’s head. The Natural is dazed and dizzied, and staggers on his feet. This allows J-MAX to spring off the ropes and haul him to the mats with a springboard spear! “YEAAAAAAAAA!” The Natural rolls to his feet but is met with painful knife edge chops from the masked wonder. Leaving Wright to clutch his now beat red chest, J-MAX runs up the ropes. He comes back with a flipping lariat that tumbles both men to the canvas and has the audience marveling at his agility! As soon as both men head to their feet, J-MA lunges forward with a running kick. But he misses The Natural as Wright meets his charge by taking him into his shoulders in set up for the Bank Roll! However, J-MAX recovers and saves himself from harsh pain by rolling forward and hauling CW into a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Wright quickly pops out of the pin. He scrambles back to his feet, only to have J-MAX leap onto his shoulders seeking an inverted hurricanrana. However CW refuses to permit such an attack to come to him and shoves J-MAX off his shoulders. The masked superstar lands awkwardly, which allows Wright to trap him into his clutches. Within moments J-MAX is being struck by the Stockmarket Crash (gordbuster!) COLE There it is! There it is! CW hooks both of J-MAX’s legs for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! THREE! DING DING DING Wright pops to his feet and raises his arms to many jeers from the Texas audience. BUFFER Your winner as a result of a pinfall…..CHRISTIAN WRIIIIIGHTTTTTTTT! Lorelei enters the ring with microphone in hand. She passes it onto Christian, and begins rubbing his shoulders as a reward for a job well done. WRIGHT Let it be heard, let it be heard! “BOOOOOOOOO!” WRIGHT From this calendar day forward, as long as the sun may set, and the moon shall shine, I, Christian Wright, will concede neither pinfall nor submission to any man! Wright releases the microphone from his hands, letting it fall gently to the floor. Lorelei takes hold of his arm and raises it into the air in celebration of his grandiose promise. COLE That’s a mighty large claim that Christian Wright has to live up to! COACH Yo that boy was 2005 rookie of the year, he’s stepping his game up and is deciding to live up to that potential. The rest of the OAOAST better watch out.

Elsewhere.... It's almost Halloween! And clearly, some OAOAST superstars are already in the mood for Halloween, namely Los Diablos De Fuego. The devilish luchadors are decked out in full devil costumes. All pink, leather devil costumes. Where you would buy such a thing is not something I wish to think too deeply about. Giggling to themselves, Moracca and Mariachi scamper down the halls creating mischief, as devils are known to do. On their way down the hall, they spy Jumbo and Deuce Deuce Bigelow hanging out. Excitedly they point over and sneak up behind Jumbo, catching him in mid bite of a slice of chocolate cake... MORACCA and MARIACHI BOOOOO!! JUMBO ..MMF..HYURGH!! As Jumbo starts choking on the cake, Moracca and Mariachi start humping at his legs, before scampering off in search of more people to spook. And leaving Deuce to perform the heimleich on his choking friend. MORACCA and MARIACHI Tee-hee-hee-hee! Spying another target, Los Diablos titter. OAOAST broadcast colleagues Tony Brannigan and Maggie Nerdly chat, blissfully unaware of the fact they're being watched. And as Big Tone works his ravishing charms on The It Girl... MORACCA and MARIACHI BOOOOO!! ...he's shocked to be ambushed and MOLESTED! BRANNIGAN HEY! GET THE HELL OFF OF ME! Brannigan, still burly after years out of the ring, manages to throw Los Diablos off of him and turns around with a snarl on his face. Los Diablos do a double-take, then take off, as Brannigan thinks about giving chase. He thinks better, not quite so nimble after years out of the ring. And he turns back to find Maggie laughing at what happened. Meanwhile, Los Diablos carry on with their mischief. Still delighted with their brush with T-Bod, Los Diablos giggle like a pair of enfatuated schoolgirls as they head down the halls. As they do, Morgan Nerdly heads the other way, deep in her own mixed-up thoughts. Los Diablos hear footsteps and without looking, they leap out at the oncoming person... MORACCA and MARIACHI BOOOOO!! MORGAN AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! MORACCA and MARIACHI :huh: Not seeing the fun in this light-hearted spooking, Morgan hits the floor and curls up into a ball, her eyes panicked. Clearly terrified the Women's Champion shakes like a leaf, convinced she's in some kind of immediate danger from these two devils. Moracca and Mariachi quickly realise that this isn't part of their fun and look at each other, confused. Beginning to get worried, the pink devils then take off, leaving poor Morgan a quivering wreck on the floor. COACH Ya'll niggas done fucked up now! COMMERCIAL

Backstage Terry Taylor is with KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN & ALIX MARIA SPEZIA TERRY TAYLOR Ladies and gentlemen, I am standing beside OAOAST World Champion, Krista Isadora Duncan! Krista you had pretty tough last week, haven’t you? ALIX Hey, dude, back off! She saw those Mark Jacobs pumps first and even if she had to club a few women with her purse, threaten bodily harm against their first born, and wave a switchblade in front of her face to get them, they’re still her’s! KRISTA Perhaps my two master degrees have finally failed me and I’m lost in a sea of miscommunication but I think, just a hunch, he’s talking about Leon Rodez attacking me last week and not my attempted battery and assault. I mean its only a guess, why would a wrestling announcer ask me about something that occurred in a wrestling ring? Why, I ask you, why? ALIX Ya know, you could’ve just said “I think he’s talking about something else” KRISTA I could’ve, but I keep our relationship in tact by undercutting your self esteem. Terry I put up with a lot of things. I deal with your repeated attempts to dress in costume and convience Alix that you’re the house underwear inspector. I deal with three different girls each running up my credit card bill for ludicrous purchases. ALIX How am I supposed to take over western Los Angeles with a sea monkey army if I don’t buy sea monkeys? KRISTA I live next door to Denise Richards- ALIX And that bitch is crazy! KRISTA See, honey, my life is a constant exercise in tolerance and self control. But what I will absolutely never ever in my 28 years of life- TERRY 28? KRISTA You heard me, penis jockey! What I won’t tolerate is some ex-pornstar who once humped a woman dressed in a banana costume for actual consumption by viewers, attacking me, blindsiding me with a steel chair. The pain was nothing short of horrific. But private exotic dancers and Grey Goose have made great strides in the pain killing department. ALIX They’re even better than doctors! Does your doctor let you swipe credit cards through her g-string like the stripper did? My pediatrician did, but for some reason he had to stop practicing due to some silly court order about not being allowed around children. KRISTA Eeeeeeek! Attention passengers we will be changing our subject immediately, please return to your seats. Terry, I will not under any circumstances allow Leon Rodez to go unpunished for attacking me last week. ALIX Even if he bought you cupcakes? KRISTA Even if he brought me cupcakes squeezed between Jessica Biel’s breasts. Leon wants to talk about suffering? Because he lost a professional wrestling title belt? Because he recruited at least 12 of the dumbest human beings to ever waste oxygen and skin on this green and blue earth to try and beat a woman who is near invincible? He’s suffering because his nice guy act has tumbled to the ground, and looks like the ruins of Paris after a world war two bombing? He wants suffering? I’ll give him suffering. How about giving up your first born daughter to adoption? How about your mother making you promise to never admit or acknowledge your sister? How about your teenager love dying in a car accident? How about being hospitalized twice for suicide attempts? How about the father of your second child totally abandoning you and leaving you to raise your daughter by yourself when you’re still college? How’s that for suffering, Leon? Do you want to suffer like that? Is that the experience you want to feel? What I felt? What your slave Morgan feels? What your minor little issues can never ever compare to? Then fine. If that’s what you want that’s exactly what I’ll give you at Halloween Spectacular. That’s a promise.

“Living in America” by James Brown hits and REV. AL… Oops, wrong promotion. In the OAOAST that music belongs to the ultra patriotic All-American Boys tag team! They march out to images of true Americana flashing on the video screen and pyro, lots of pyro. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from the Hearts of the American people, they fight for truth, justice and the American way… FREEDOM and LIBERTY… THE ALL-AMERICAN BOYS!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Liberty proudly waves Old Glory while Freedom shakes hands and kisses babies. COLE We’re about set to go with tag team action. The All-American Boys vs. the Mardi Gras Hellfire Club. COACH Basically a tune-up for the Hellfire Club, although they already look sharp heading into their match against the Orange County Cobras at the Halloween Spectacular. COLE If by sharp you mean ambushing Simon Singleton and Ned Blanchard two weeks ago on OAOAST Syndicated. Speaking of the O.C. Cobras, they’re standing by with these pre-recorded comments. OAOAST A small box swoops across the screen and settles in the upper left hand corner. There Simon and Ned stand in front of a grey backdrop. MOLLY (Off-screen) And action! SIMON Lucius, Rico, you two douche bags have done a lot of talking in recent weeks. The last couple of times we’ve been in the ring together you’ve left us laying. Next time we meet it’s gonna be face to face. So it’s either put up or shut up, and I can tell you right now we plan on shutting you up. NED Halloween night, it’s gonna be no treat for the Mardi Gras Hellfire Club. MOLLY (O.S.) And cut! That’s a wrap! OAOAST COACH Oh, how cute. Molly’s directing promo spots now. I wonder who she had to put out for to land that gig. COLE "Right Round" by Flo Rida cues and Queen Esther escorts her knights ringside. BUFFER And their opponents, representing ALL THE QUEEN‘S MEN… “SWEET” LUCIUS SOUL and RICO DE JANEIRO… THE MARDI GRAS HELLFIRE CLUB!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Rico places his bejeweled scepter in the corner and the MGHFC are ready for action. * DINGDINGDING * The bell sounds and Rico starts with Freedom. Knee to the gut doubles Freedom over and a big right knocks him off his feet. Rico proceeds to put the boots to Freedom and then cheap shots Liberty. The King of Mardi Gras whips Freedom to the buckle and tags Lucius. COACH Watch this, Cole. Soul combs his ‘fro and then lets go with a CORNER YAKUZA KICK! Freedom stumbles out into THE POUNCE~!!! The cover. ONE! TWO! THR-- NO! Playtime isn’t over yet. Lucius shoves Freedom near the All-American Boys corner and invites Liberty inside. A proud American, Liberty doesn’t back down. But upon entering the ring he’s struck by a running knee to the side of the head! COLE Some host Lucius is. He invites Liberty in and then does that? Come on. Lucius whips Liberty to the corner for his trademark SOUL BROTHER SPLASH! A tag follows and Rico delivers a BACK SUPLEX FROM THE MIDDLE ROPE! The Mardi Gras Hellfire Club then finish Liberty off with THE MOUSTACHE RIDE/SWINGING DDT combo! COLE What do you call that? COACH I don’t know, but it’s devastating. The cover. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! * DINGDINGDING * BUFFER Here are your winners, the team of “SWEET” LUCIUS SOUL and RICO DE JANEIRO… THE MARDI GRAS HELLFIRE CLUB!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The Hellfire Club’s hands are raised in victory as Queen Esther cheers her men on. COLE Is this what we’re gonna see at the Halloween Spectacular? The Mardi Gras Hellfire Club victorious? COACH Yes. COLE No, we’re gonna have to find out Halloween night. We'll also find out if we have a new world champion as well as a new women's champion. It's going to be an explosive, exciting and possibly scary sight, and its live on TSM and The Pit! COMMERCIAL

Backstage, Vinny Valentine, Deadbeat Dave, and Tony Tourettes are seen playing UNO. Dave puts a card down, then Vinny looks at his hand, and picks up another card from the deck. Tony then slams his last card into the pile. TONY I WIN, BITCHES! VINNY What? TONY That was my last card! VINNY Wait...you didn't say Uno! You don't win! TONY (picks up deck) LIKE HELL I DON'T! I got rid of all my cards! DAVE You gotta say Uno, man. That's the rule. VINNY And if you don't, you have to draw two more cards, so pick 'em up, bitch! Tony ponders this for a second, then throws the deck of cards in Vinny's face. TONY FUCK YOU, I WON! Suddenly, a knock on the door. LUTHER (off-screen) Somebody order a large pepperoni dick wit' a pizza on top? Luther hops through the door, holding a pizza box over his pelvic area. Fortunately, the box is still closed. LUTHER Man, what the f... Luther turns into the corner, then tosses the pizza box down and zips up his pants. He then slaps Waldo in the head. LUTHER This ain't Jade's locker room, foo! Waldo laughs while rubbing his head. Mariano and Quincy walk into the room, as well. LUTHER It ain't funny, nigga! I just wasted that pizza, too. VINNY (chuckling) Just give it to Tony, he'll probably eat it! Tony lunges over the table for Vinny, causing it to fall forward and spill him on his face. MARIANO You v-squared, you got the shit or what, mang? Vinny pulls out a big bag of discolored marijuana. QUINCY Man, what the fuck is that shit? Cheap-ass white boy, we ain't gettin' lit on that shit! Look, all the stems n' shit's in dere! VINNY Hey, don't call me cheap, Mr. Most Likely to take his prom date to McDonald's! I don't see any of you carrying no grass! MARIANO See, you wrong there, homie! It just so happens, I brought my backup stash, just in case you screwed this up. Mariano pulls out the sack. LUTHER Way to think, baby! TONY Well, WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE WAITING FOR? SIT YOUR ASSES DOWN! The BB's sit down. Waldo sits down next to Dave. WALDO Nigga you musty! You like the missin' Teletubby, Stinky Winky! LUTHER Or 'dat old president, Abe Stinkin'! VINNY It's alright, once we light this shit up, you won't even notice it. Off-screen, the door opens. BIFF (off-screen) Hey! pizza! LUTHER ...help yo' self, man! Everyone at the table laughs as they roll up joints. COLE Family friendly fun, here on HeldDOWN~! NEXT WEEK ON HeldDOWN~! ANGLEMANIA REMATCH KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN VS MISTER DICK NEXT WEEK! COMMERCIAL

WOMEN'S TITLE: Holly Vs Morgan Nerdly