Patty O'Green

My brothers I can honestly wait no longer. I have delayed past my intentions and I am guilt ridden due to it! The show has gone up! Hey, who needs the last two matches anyway?! We all like it when HD goes up without knowing who won two major ppv matches, am i rite e-wrestling thugs?

COLE Coming up next, tag team action featuring The Love Doctors against the pair of individuals who did this to them a couple of weeks ago. OAOAST FLASHBACK HeldDOWN~! November 14, 2008 Upon the video’s conclusion we cut backstage where Tony Brannigan is with Mr. Dick and Malaysia. BRANNIGAN In his first television interview since joining the Deadly Alliance one week ago, I have the opportunity to speak with this man, Mr. Dick. He’s of course accompanied by Malaysia. MR. DICK (chewing gum) Now officially the world’s most deadliest woman I might add. BRANNIGAN Be that as it may, before we get to your match tonight, let us go back to this past Sunday night at November Reign. You both had major bouts on the card, but neither one was successful. In fairness to you, however, Mr. Dick, it became 2 on 1 once team captain Theodore Moneymaker hung you out to dry. Though it doesn’t change the fact you guys blew a 4 on 2 advantage. MR. DICK At least you called a spade a spade, Brannigan. But you failed to mention how Malaysia got robbed of the Women’s title. She had Jade Rodez right where she wanted her until Auntie Alix came to her aid. BRANNIGAN Need I remind you that match was no disqualification? A stipulation Malaysia specifically demanded! MALAYSIA Let my little pony gallop awhile longer before I take her out back and put her down. It’s not the kill, it’s the thrill of the chase. The terror in your eyes, the fear in your voice… Ooh, it makes me feel so…alive. BRANNIGAN That’s one sick lady you got there. MR. DICK She’s fine. And so am I after the luxury liner I was on Sunday night sank. Had there been a co-captain onboard, like say me, once the captain fell asleep behind the wheel I could’ve steered the ship in the right direction. Instead our so-called captain abandon ship with a very important piece of cargo still onboard. BRANNIGAN Allow me to guess -- you. MR. DICK (nodding head) Fortunately my enormous package kept me afloat and I was able to navigate the rocky waters back to shore. That’s why Malaysia and I are excited to be part of the premier organization in this industry, the Deadly Alliance. When Alfredo and the boys say they’re gonna do something, they get it done. There’s no false promises or empty rhetoric when it comes to the DA, just like there ain’t with me. I told everybody bigger and better things lied ahead for Mr. Dick and after last week I’d say things...just...got...DEADLIER! BRANNIGAN You’ve got the catchphrase down, but can you keep The Love Doctors down in order to pick up the victory here tonight? MR. DICK What are they so angry about anyway? They’re lucky I didn’t go to the review board to get their licenses revoked after the way they treated me when I came seeking medical assistance. But they’ll be a pretty good test for us before the Anderson Cup. BRANNIGAN Wait a minute. You and Malaysia in the Anderson Cup? MR. DICK Isn’t that right around the corner? BRANNIGAN January 2009, yes. MR. DICK Figured so. I’ve been in a few of those rodeos; never won it because a man can only carry someone else’s weight around for so long. The 2009 Anderson Cup is gonna be a whole new different story though. I got me a partner who can handle their fair share of the load this go around. BRANNIGAN Do you not remember who the current tag titleholders are? MR. DICK Reject and TK. And I see where you’re getting at. Well I got some Hot Newz~! for you, pal. I ran this idea past the DA and they love it. See, there ain’t nobody who can dethrone the champs, so we’re in it for the other gold prize at stake -- that humongous trophy awarded to the winner. Malaysia and I could have some real fun with that. BRANNIGAN MALAYSIA Hmm, just the thought of you jabbing that big hard wooden trophy deep inside drives me CRAZY. BRANNIGAN I’d be careful doing anything out of the ordinary with that thing. Think about the splinters! MALAYSIA (eyes rolled in back of head) OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH~!!! MR. DICK I think she’s ready for action, wouldn’t you say? So Love Doctors, whatcha gonna do when Dickzilla and the world’s most deadliest women pop all over you?! When I come crashing down and its throbbing deep inside I’ll leave you wetter than a flood tide I gotta bend you over that’s how I like to ride! I date a girl who whips my hide And my 12 inches is my greatest pride I am a Real American Dick! Exploding on the face of every woman! I am Real American Dick! Suck on my balls, till I cum like Niagara falls! The music segues to “Womanizer” as Mr. Dick and Malaysia march out through a golden shower of pyro. BUFFER The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall. Coming down the aisle, representing THE DEADLY ALLIANCE! First, from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, a former Women’s Champion, presenting the Ultimate Combination of Beauty and Beatdowns... MMMMAAALLLLLLAAAAAYYYYYSIA!! Her partner hails from San Antonio, Texas, and weights in at a hard 237 pounds… MISSSSSTERRRRRRRR DICK!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The Real American Dick channels his inner Hulk Hogan, cupping not his ear but his BALL SACK in every which direction, before he tears away his chaps and parades around in short shorts with a heart strategically placed on his crotch. COACH Ever heard of ball in a cup, Cole? Well this is the new organic version of it, BALLS in a cup! COLE I understand our broadcast colleague Tony Brannigan has paged The Love Doctors to the interview area. Let’s go to them right now. And we do, to find Dr. Max scribbling on his clipboard and Dr. Steven making sure his t-shirt plugging his Love Live program on local Chicago radio is front and center. BRANNIGAN Arguably their biggest match to date, tonight my guests look to avenge a beat down from two weeks ago. DR. STEVEN We have all the paperwork in order Tony, all that’s left to fill out is Mr. Dick and Malaysia’s time of death. DR. MAX Ever heard the phrase “the operation was a success but the patient died”? BRANNIGAN Indeed I have. DR. MAX/STEVEN This is one operation we hope the patients do die! *WHIIIR!* *WHIIIR!* Doctor, doctor, give me the news I've got a bad case of lovin' you No pill's gonna cure my ill I've got a bad case of lovin' you 20,000 screaming Osmonds, mostly on Marie’s side of the fence, welcome the Love Doctors onstage, and for their loyal and vocal support they are treated to a strip tease! BUFFER And their opponents! Hailing from Chicago, Illinois, the team of MAX ANDERSON and STEVEN PIGLEY... THE LOOOOOOOOOVE DOCTORS!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Anderson and Pigley wave and blow kisses to their adoring fans. The Doctors of Doctornomics pumped for their match. COACH I bet there isn’t a day that goes by Anderson and Pigley don’t regret setting up their practice in Salt Lake City. They’d be the richest men in the world had they done so! COLE If you wanna go there, Coach, I suggest you call in to the Love Line hosted by Dr. Steven Pigley on local Chicago radio and ask. Some teams use rock, paper, scissors to determine who’ll start for their team, Mr. Dick and Malaysia, however, squeeze each other’s crotches until somebody releases. Never one to go off prematurely the Human Hard On emerges victorious. COLE That’s kind of like how we decide who speaks first, Coach. COACH In your dreams maybe. Malaysia concedes defeat with a congratulatory bite on the ear. Meanwhile, Anderson gets the nod for The Love Doctors. * DINGDINGDING * Threaten little by his opponent Mr. Dick grabs a side headlock and gives Dr. Max a NUGGIE~! COACH COLE How disrespectful. I’d love nothing more than to see that man go on a Gurney to the Center of the Earth. MD hears it from the crowd for his balls in a cup taunt, to which he challenges anybody to do something about it. Max Anderson does with an arm drag out of a tie-up and body slam. Dick charges back and into a side headlock takedown, then a NUGGIE! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" MR. DICK A dropkick wipes the look off MD’s face and leads to a tag. Face to face, Malaysia offers Dr. Max the first punch. Ever the gentlemen he declines, preferring to lockup instead. * FOREARM~! * “OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” Unlike the good doctor, Malaysia has no problem firing the first shot. Anderson shakes off the cobwebs and issues a warning, one that goes unheeded. * FOREARM~! * His patience wearing thin Dr. Max asks Malaysia to wrestle, not fight. Malaysia ignores his request and fires another forearm…but does a faceplant courtesy of a drop toehold! Anderson places her in a front facelock and tags fellow Love Doctor Steven Pigley. COACH Did you see that, Cole? Max Anderson totally copped a feel. He ought to have his licensed removed and be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. There’s no place for that kind of harassment. COLE This wouldn’t have anything to do with their blue M&M rib on you? COACH I don’t know what you’re talking about. COLE Riiight. Malaysia rakes the eyes to escape an arm-wringer, then across the back for kicks. YAKUZA KICK TO THE CHEST floors Pigley. The cover. ONE! TWO! NO! The Real American Dick cheers on his main squeeze as she decides to inflict more pain on her foe. Scooped for a slam Dr. Pigley manages to float over the top and roll Malaysia up in a SCHOOL BOY! ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Dr. Max and Mr. Dick enter the fray and a pier-six erupts. Whipped into each other MD is spun around from the impact and drops on all fours…and Malaysia just so happens to fall right behind to put the pair in a hilarious compromising position. COLE COACH Oh, yeah. You laugh now but I promise you’ll be crying later. This match is far from over. MD and Malaysia roll outside to regroup. COLE Fans, the tape machines are rolling. Should the match end during the break we’ll show it to you when we return. But stay right where you are. HeldDOWN~! continues after these messages. Tonight following HeldDOWN~! on TSM The action resumes with Mr. Dick paint brushing Dr. Steven in an arm bar. Pigley fights back and breaks free, but MD reverses a whip and lands a clothesline… NO, CRUCIFIX BOMB!!! COLE Back to live action and WHAT A COUNTER! ONE! TWO! THR-- KICKOUT! Dr. Pigley heads up top following a suplex for his patent SHOOTING STAR ELBOW. He plays to the crowd and lives to regret it as Malaysia SWIPES his legs out from under, CROTCHING the Love Doctor on the turnbuckle! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Mr. Dick unloads a FACIAL, formerly the discus punch, on Pigley that knocks him outside where Malaysia delivers a slam on the arena floor. Malaysia receives the tag once Dr. Steven is dumped back in and hits a butterfly suplex, then hooks the leg on the pin attempt. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Short-arm elbow smash levels Pigley, whose chest Malaysia tries to leave her imprint on with repeated stomps. The Ultimate Combination of Beauty and Beatdowns rams Dr. Steven into the buckle and, following a tag, joins Mr. Dick in a picturesque double back suplex! ONE! TWO! THR-- NO! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" COLE Luckily for Dr. Steven his colleague Max was there to make the save. COACH You put it well, Mikey Cole. The Love Doctors got lucky. If not for Dr. Max there’s no doubt in my mind that would’ve been it. * PATOOEY * A wad of spit is enough to bait Dr. Max inside, which allows MD and Malaysia to put the boots to Dr. Steven while the official deals with the other Love Doctor. COACH Go ahead and whine, Cole. Be like Mack Brown and the University of Texas. Like them, by now you should know how the game is played. It may not always be fair but at the end of the day the objective is simple: just win, baby. JUST BEING A DICK, Pigley is head butted in the groin! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Once again the legal participant, Malaysia sits Dr. Steven upright and grinds her knee into the back of his spine while yanking his hair with one hand and his nose with the other! COACH This move even pains me, baby boy. I’ve got such a great but controversial line. COLE Well say it that way I wouldn’t have to deal with you anymore! * CLAP * CLAP * CLAP * CLAP * Fueled by the crowd Pigley hits a jawbreaker to break from Malaysia’s grip, setting the stage for a most thrilling finish. Their respective partners in position for the tag, it becomes a race to see who can reach their corner first. Mr. Dick turns this into a game of inches, shoving his pelvis through the ropes to make the tag all the more easier for Malaysia. And it pays dividends as she tags his member, but the Love Doctors tag as well! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" MR. DICK SPINNING BACKFISTS put MD on his heels long enough for a whip and BAAAAAAAAACK BODYDROP! The Real American Dick begs off to buy Malaysia time to sneak up on Dr. Max, but he spots and drops her with a clothesline! COACH What a fraud Max Anderson is. He waits until Malaysia isn’t ready to throw a cheap shot. This after she offered him the first punch earlier in the match. COLE I don’t know what match you’re watching, but it sure as hell isn’t the same one I am. MD blindsides Dr. Max, then presses him in the air on the rebound…but Anderson slips out and with assistance from Dr. Steven they hit an inverted atomic drop/dropkick combo! COACH It’s the Lovematic Grampa! The Love Doctors aren’t done yet. With their opponent dazed they take him on a GURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE EARTH~!!! The cover. ONE! TWO! MALAYSIA YANKS EARL HEBNER AWAY AND SCURRIES OFF TO AVOID DETECTION! EARL Unbeknownst to Dr. Steven, Malaysia appears behind and delivers a LOW BLOW~! Dr. Max charges forward and into a big BOSSMAN SLAM!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Malaysia stomps on Mr. Dick’s pubes to revive him, and he finishes Dr. Max off with the COCK BLOCK! ONE! TWO! THREE!!! * DINGDINGDING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of the match… MR. DICK and MALAYSIA! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE An impressive victory to say the least. This, ladies and gentlemen, the kind of action you’ll see when the Anderson Cup kicks off next month. COACH No other team should even bother entering the Anderson Cup. After their performance tonight I say Mr. Dick and Malaysia are the clear favorites.

The very sexy Kim Sozzi sings us back to HeldDOWN with her epic and sensual trance anthem It's a good job we've got so many cameras in so many locker rooms and it can't be constituted as spying in any way. Because now we're required in the locker room of Krista Isadora Duncan and assorted family. Alix isn't really family, but as good as and she's there to greet an actual member of family, Jade Rodez-Duncan, as she arrives with her bags fashionably late. ALIX Eeek! There's my little Champion! Alix runs up and gives Jade a big and above all unexpected hug, squeezing the life out of the poor girl to the point that she almost drops the bag she's carrying. By the time Alix has prised herself off of Jade she's left with aching ribs and a cough, which she tries to hide out of courtesy. She sets her bag down, before glancing over at Krista, who sits on the luxurious brown leather couch only her dressing room could command, busy reading over a glossy celebrity magazine which we cannot name due to advertising laws! JADE Hi Mom. KRISTA (barely listening) Oh, hey Stephen. How's the radio show going? ALIX She can't hear you sweetie. She's lost in goss'. It's great! I've already bagged a new widescreen TV and tickets to a West End show this weekend! Boy, is she gonna be pissed when she realises I'm not really Marilyn Monroe come back to life and just wanting to be loved by her, just her! Worth it. So worth it. Anysnickles, how are you feeling? Are you okay? Is everything good? Doin' okay? Everything kosher? Feelin' fine? JADE I'm a li... ALIX Just chill? Good in the hood? Killer awesome? Do go on. JADE ...I'm a little sore, few bumps and bruises. Nothing too major, ALIX But you're still the champeen, ain'tcha! All those people who said you couldn't beat Malaysia, they were all wrong. Malaysia, Mr. Dick, Terry Taylor, Coach, Alix Maria Spezia, Las Vegas oddsmakers who were strangely unco-operative on the idea of betting on pro-wrestling, they were ALL wrong! All those people who said you didn't stand a chance against that kinky sex machine and that you'd get whipped so bad people'd be like "damn, when'd they bring back slavery but spare the blacks and round up all the cute blonde cheerleaders this time, does this mean all my favourite porn sites are gonna be gone or just be more extreme now", all those people were dead wrong! All those people who called you an epic failure who was bringing down the Duncan dynasty one embarrassing, poorly choreograped public appearance at a time, stinki... JADE Yeah, yeah, I get it. ALIX Forget dose fools, Jade! Forget dose fools so hard because they were wrong and you were right all along! You're awesome now! You're so awesome, even your uncle wins titles now, that's how awesome you are! You're so awesome, you can do anything! Why, I bet you could even get Bohemoth to date you now. Or, you could become, like, a world famous race jockey and win the big Derby! We could plan it together, Jade. We could plan it together and they'd never find the money. JADE I don't know about that. ALIX Trust me I got it all figured out, I've already found a horse so we just gotta get you some horse lessons... JADE No, I mean about Bohemoth. ALIX What!? Are you crazy? He's gotta be hot to trot for you now, you're a famous race jockey! I mean a Women's Champion! You beat Malaysia in a Street Fight, didn't ya hear? Also, also! You're the fourth most searched for celebrity on AskJeeves ever since I put out that rumour about the naked photos. Right? Remember? 'Heart' the internet. Those morons'll believe anything if it involves nudity or conspiracy theories. Also, didn't ya hear me earlier when I said I bet you could do anything now? Cause you could. You just gotta be super confident and super quick before your luck runs out and you're not awesome anymore. JADE What's that suppos... ALIX NO TIME TO TALK! TIME TO ACT! You gotta march right over there and get with that Big Bo thang! Seduce him while you're seductable! GO NOW! AND DON'T COME BACK UNTIL HE'S LET YOU TOUCH HIS MUSCLES!! Much to Jade's continuing confusion and shock, which to be fair she's learnt how to deal with by now without too much fuss, she finds herself being shoved out the door by Alix and having it slammed behind her. A couple of seconds pass, before Alix suddenly routes through Jade's bag, grabbing her Women's Title belt. Luckily Jade is still in shock and stood behind the door as Alix passes it to her. JADE Wait! What am I supposed to say? ALIX Improvise. And don't forget, you're awesome! *SLAM!* KRISTA What was that? ALIX Nothing, nothing. Now, let's talk about that motor scooter for my underpriviledged students again, Miss Duncan. They'd like it to be pink... Krista nods her head without listening, causing Alix to bounce up and down and clap her hands together like a playful child. COMING UP NEXT MISTER DICK AND MALAYSIA VS THE LOVE DOCTORS NEXT COMMERCIAL

WHO HAS SOILED THE NEW TESTAMENT TO THE DON AKA THE GODFATHER AKA BLACK JESUS AKA MAMBA AKA BEAN AKA KOBE BRYANT? TONY? ALF? I'M SORRY MAMBA! I NEVER MEANT TO HURT YOU! I NEVER MEANT TO MAKE YOU CRY! BUT TONIGHT THEY GOT ME IN THE CLOSET! A man can't even pay tribute to another man without somebody fucking it up! Niggas won't let you have shit these days!

Real spit, did anyone here play an organized sport in highschool? Pocket pool while peeping into the middle school boys shower does not count as a sport. Lovely opener! Pantera came out lookin really strong, and almost defied the odds to make a big comeback. Wonder what the future holds for Denzel Spencer? He's been coming on strong lately. Could a Heartland victory be in his near future? Bravo, KC, bravo on a fine women's title match. Little Miss Cali has finally rid herself of the demon known as Malaysia and made Coach and all the doubters eat crow. Malaysia is seriously fucked up for wanting to use a cattle prod. There needs to be a Nerdly family intervention. The handcuff spot with Alix was very cute. But what does the future hold for Jadey? Why do I ask myself questions I already know the answer to? Why do I ask questions anyway, no one answers them. LAWLING@the stewie griffin t-shirt bit. Really enjoyed this SS contest. With so many characters such as the BHB' or D*LUX, we don't often get to use O'Hara or the CAE as much as we should and its good to see them gettin some PPV shine. I was super shocked to see Maddix eliminated! I had him pegged as the sole survivor eliminating Baron, and he goes out before anyone. All that tough talkin to his dudes gonna bite him in the ass now. I wouldn't mind seeing the CAE and CI feud continue. Man, that was a cool intro, that would've looked awesome live. This was a nice fast paced type SS match. Everyone got their shine on and there wasn't a single dull moment. Or sentence. A joy to read, that's what this was. It looks like the DA may have sealed the coffin on Heyross, but I bet there's more to come between those two teams. Sandy keeps on a rollin also. My dvd cover! I win! I win! Cute little commercial. One day someone should actually make a DVD in post form. See, you put the matches in the post and in between you do the interviews with people and stuff. That is a damn good idea! Admit it! Admit it! You know it is. You're probably leanin back in your chair goin "wow, Patty just changed the game up" Really liked the IC match, always loved Ragdoll so its nice to see him with another title. He's always been a big time player when he's been around and makes for an entertaining dynamic. I like when he got on the mic and did the fake introductions in the middle of the match, that was really cool. There's a character with lots and lots of personality. Hey, the US Title and the IC title are both held by mainevent level characters! What do you people have against the CPA's of the world? Huh? Meanies! Much respect to my dude Dr.Z for gettin his match in THREE WEEKS early. If anyone can ever beat them I'll send them a lolipop, no fuckin lie. ALF THINKS HE'S ON SOME SLICK SHIT RIGHT HERE! But I put on the hater blockers and some whitney houston, Its not right, buts it okay, I'm gonna make it anyway! Sing it whitney, sing it! Oh shit WTF?! Synth was never eliminated! I'm gonna go off and yell at some one right quick. The white man is fuckin up! I guess I better edit that, but Mama's Family is on and I wanna check that out for a bit. AH-HA! In a night full of dudes almost coming from behind to win matches only Zack and Krista can pull it off. In your ass other characters!!!! In yo ass!2 Leon's world title win was shocking. I mean, I honestly had no idea that he was going to win. It was a complete and utter surprise that left my floored. Totally unexpected from this colour kid. Srsly. Truthfully. Honestly. Naw I lie, kid, I knew for awhile. I know everything about everyone. I am all powerful. I even know shit your characters will do before they do it. Solid contest with a storybook ending. PRL truly got served, this is one some Billie Jean King type shit right here. Leon scored a victory for funny dudes from Michigan everywhere. I expect Tim Meadows to win the US title soon. Really liked the dynamic of Tha Puerto Rican being cocky, basically disregarding Leon as a threat at some points. Landon's appearance was also interesting, and you can bet he'll remind PR that if he had just accepted his help he'd still be champ.

No. This is now the One And Only Kobe Bryant Sucks Thread. Together we will celebrate the greatness of Kobe "Bean" Bryant through poetry, song, anecdotes, and dance. wrote this a while back for the GOAT to the tune of Hey Mama by Kanye Hey Mamba,I wanna scream so loud for you, cuz I'm so proud of you Let me tell you what I'm about to do I know I act a fool but, I promise to always root for you I appreciate what you've done for me I know 52 points is enough for me I wanna tell the whole world about a friend of mine This little light of mine and I'm finna let it shine I'm finna talk about Mamba if y'all dont mind I was 10 years old and I used to cry Monday night and Kobe not playing? Imma die Late January, harsh winter gave me a cold Turned on the T.V and 81 points. that was good for the soul Went on TSM coulda seen Alf bein a troll You play late nights and I keep off the lights turnaround 3, that was a very good sight And you would give anything in this world You need to bless us with a boy. Another girl? I almosted hurled And you never put no team over me and I love you Kobe for that, can't you see?!! 10 years old, caught you with tears in your eyes national T.V.. colorado man? I wish that bitch dies As I knelt on the kitchen floor I said Kobe, Imma love you t'ill I can't post no more And when I get older, I aint gonna hurt no more viewed 81 point game 100th time and my hand was sore(*wink*) See you're, unbreakable, unmistakable unshakable, unattainable. A livin legend too, just look at what heaven do Send us an angel, and I thank you REMIX

Los Convoodoowhores Vs Krista Isadora Duncan and Tyler Bryant maybe another match because you lazy sacks of donkey shit couldn't follow KC's simple request and write a squash match or something so you can choke on a sack of baby dicks. Just kidding about some of that. But not all! I reserve opening promo 4 our new champion unless KC doesn't want it, then fuck him, I ain't doin nice shit for nobody around no more, tired of you BUM ASS WHITE BOYS!

lol my dude, you edited it in the wrong version of the 2nd part! Remember when I said it wasn't proof read at all when I sent it to you? I weren't tellin no lies, mang. But not to worry the right version is in and all is well with DecNovember Reign!

Okay fuck that Friday nonsense. This is show is mos.def going up on Saturday.

more space!

*DING DING DING* OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH THA PUERTO RICAN (Champion) vs. LEON RODEZ (Challenger) The crowd is on fire! Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez circle each other. COLE And here we go! Main event time! Tha Puerto Rican, the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion, defends his Title against a man he says isn’t in his league and isn’t World Champion material. If there was any time for Leon to prove the naysayers wrong, this is it! VENTURA Dynamite commentary, Cole! It’s no wonder you’re the lead announcer for the OAOAST! COLE Thank you, Jess! What a nice compliment! VENTURA (under his breath) Dork. “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” Leon and PRL are both hesitant to make the first move. Finally, they lock up. P.R. and Leon jockey for position, neither man gaining the advantage. After several moments, Tha Puerto Rican shoves Leon onto the mat! Tha Puerto Rican then flexes his muscles with a cocky smirk on his face! “YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!”/ ”BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE And PRL strikes first blood! VENTURA And look at him! He’s ALREADY showing off! PRL taunts Leon. Leon is slightly shocked at being shoved onto the mat so quickly. PR motions for Rodez to get back to his feet. So, Leon does so. The New Age Love Machine and the P.R. Menace circle each other again. After some hesitation, they lock up again. Once more, both men jockey for position, with neither man gaining the advantage. Then, Leon shoves Tha Puerto Rican onto the mat! Leon then flexes *his* muscles with a cocky smirk on *his* face! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” COLE And Leon strikes back just like that! Leon takes it one step further by doing some trademark Hulk Hogan poses! Leon cups his right hand to his right ear, and then pantomimes ripping his shirt off! “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” COLE Silkamania is runnin’ wild, BROTHER! VENTURA This is EXACTLY what Tha Puerto Rican has been talking about! All Leon wants to do is joke and joke and joke! Tha Puerto Rican is shocked at being shoved onto the mat so quickly. But he quickly gets his head back into the game. THA PUERTO RICAN WOULD YOU BE SERIOUS FOR ONE FREAKIN’ SECOND!?!?!? LEON You want me to be serious!? All right. COME ON! Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez lock up once again. And again, both men jockey for position. They are unable to get an advantage, so they break it up. But one second later, they lock up for the fourth time. And it is at this point, that Tha Puerto Rican gains the advantage, applying a headlock on the challenger to his World Heavyweight Title! PR cinches the hold tight, a look of determination on his face! COLE Two popular superstars, Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez, going at it! “P.R. SUCKS!” “P.R. SUCKS!” “P.R. SUCKS!” “P.R. SUCKS!” VENTURA Well, maybe not popular to EVERYBODY in this arena, Michael Cole! PRL turns the headlock into a hammerlock on Rodez. Leon reverses into his own hammerlock. He then applies a headlock on Tha Puerto Rican! COLE Nice exchange. Good go behind from the hammerlock by Leon Rodez! Leon cinches the headlock tight! PRL shoves Leon into the ropes. Leon responds with a shoulder tackle that takes Tha Puerto Rican down onto the mat! Rodez then bounces off of the ropes, leaps over Tha Puerto Rican, bounces off of the opposite ropes, Tha Puerto Rican leapfrogs over Leon Rodez, Leon bounces off of the ropes, PRL does a reverse leapfrog over Leon Rodez, Leon bounces off of the opposite ropes, Tha Puerto Rican hits Leon with an arm-drag, taking him down onto the mat! COLE Vintage PRL! Tha Puerto Rican applies an arm-bar on Leon. He taunts Leon. Referee Charles Robinson checks on Leon, who is grimacing in pain already. COLE Tha Puerto Rican is the 15th One And Only AngleSault Thread Superstar to hold the One And Only AngleSault Thread World Heavyweight Championship. His name will always be on the belt, on the side plates, regardless of whether he wins or loses here tonight. Leon Rodez is hoping to one day have his name inscribed on the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt, and that day may be today IF he can defeat Tha Puerto Rican either by pinfall or submission! VENTURA Which he has yet to do in his five and half years in the One And Only AngleSault Thread. COLE True, but I think that just gives Leon MORE motivation! Leon gets on his hands and knees, so PRL drops an elbow onto Leon’s left arm! Leon gets up, still trapped in the arm-bar, which soon turns into a wristlock by Tha Puerto Rican. PRL then pulls Leon back into a headlock! Puerto cinches the hold tight. Leon falls to his right knee, which leads to the crowd starting a “LEON!” chant. Charles Robinson asks Leon if he gives up. Leon responds by standing up, and then shoving PRL into the ropes. PRL responds with a shoulderblock, knocking Leon down! PRL bounces off of the ropes, leaps over Leon, bounces off of the opposite ropes…and gets arm-dragged down onto the mat by Leon Rodez! PRL gets right back up, so Leon gives P.R. another arm-drag onto the mat! Leon holds onto the right arm to apply an arm-bar! COLE Nice arm-drag takedown by Leon Rodez! Leon drops a few knees onto PRL’s right arm! He then applies another arm-bar on the arm. Leon cinches the hold tight. But PR quickly gets back to a vertical base, still trapped in the arm-bar. He tries to grab Leon’s hair, but Leon counters that by applying a hammerlock on Tha Puerto Rican’s right arm! “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” Leon slams the point of his right elbow onto Tha Puerto Rican’s right arm! He then pulls down on the arm, further hurting PRL! Leon whips Tha Puerto Rican into the ropes--PRL reverses, Leon bounces off of the ropes, right into a running back elbow from Tha Puerto Rican! COLE P.R. with a double back elbow! The crowd cheers! Leon lies on the mat, clutching his jaw after the running back elbow. He gets up…and shoves Tha Puerto Rican! VENTURA Look at that! Leon showing ANGER! LEON SPEARS THA PUERTO RICAN DOWN AND STARTS PUMMELING AWAY AT HIM! COLE Shades of The Love Shack four weeks ago! VENTURA Except it was Leon who instigated it this time, Michael Cole! The crowd is shocked, but delighted at Leon’s aggression! COLE Leon Rodez has taken off the kid gloves! He wants to become OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion here tonight, and he’s showing us how bad he wants it! Rodez suddenly stops punching PRL. He calms down, seemingly in an anger induced trance for the past few minutes. Leon takes a deep breath, and then picks Tha Puerto Rican up. Punches take PRL into the ropes. *CHOP!* “WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” *CHOP!* “WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” *CHOP!* “WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Leon grabs PR’s left hand, and then gives him an Irish whip into the opposite ropes. Leon goes for a clothesline, Tha Puerto Rican ducks, bounces off of the opposite ropes, Leon goes for a jumping back kick, but THA PUERTO RICAN HOLDS ONTO THE ROPES! P.R. then charges forward with a clothesline of his own, knocking Leon Rodez down onto the mat! Afterwards, PRL points to his head to show how smart he is! “YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”/ ”BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE P.R. getting a bit cocky! VENTURA He’s been cocky his whole career! Why stop now!? PRL gets on top of Leon and starts pummeling him! COLE And now PRL getting some payback from moments ago! VENTURA He’s bringing it, and he expects Leon to too! P.R. stands up, plays to the crowd, and then waits for Leon to get up. When he does, PR grabs Leon’s left hand, and then gives him an Irish whip into the ropes. Leon bounces off of the ropes, PRL puts his head down, Leon stops in his tracks and kicks Tha Puerto Rican right in the face! PRL staggers around the ring, clutching his face. Leon charges forward…RIGHT INTO A LATIN SLAM!!!!--NO!!!--Leon elbows out of the Latin Slam attempt! PRL takes a few steps back and then charges forward…Leon grabs PRL’s legs and sweeps him onto the mat! LIONTAMER!!!--NO!!!--PRL grabs the bottom ring rope, and Leon has to let go! COLE Latin Slam blocked! Liontamer blocked! These two men know each other very well! VENTURA This match is a far cry from their match at AngleMania V! COLE Indeed, Jess. Both men are a little older. A little wiser. And they are more prepared for each other this time around! They have learned so much about each other since AngleMania V! Leon drags PRL by his legs into the center of the ring. He makes the first cover of the match! 1... 2... KICK OUT!!! COLE Leon trying to surprise PR and end this match as soon as possible! Rodez stands up and starts stomping on PRL. He then picks up Tha Puerto Rican and hits him with some Clubberin’~! They Be Clubberin’~! forearms! The forearms bring PRL to his knees, so Leon sets him back up straight again so that he can go for a punch--BLOCKED! P.R. fires with a Rock-style punch to the temple! And another! And another! PRL whips Leon Rodez into the ropes! Leon fires back with a flying forearm knocking Tha Puerto Rican down onto the mat! Leon does no kip ups, instead choosing to just cover PRL, hooking his right leg. ONE! TWO! RIGHT SHOULDER UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! COLE The flying forearm only put Tha Puerto Rican down for a few seconds! But as of this moment, he is still the holder of the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title! Leon does a disappointed sigh. PRL is now a little groggy. Leon picks Tha Puerto Rican up. “LET’S GO P.R.!” “LET’S GO LE-ON!” “LET’S GO P.R.!” “LET’S GO LE-ON!” “LET’S GO P.R.!” “LET’S GO LE-ON!” “LET’S GO P.R.!” “LET’S GO LE-ON!” Rodez sends Puerto into a turnbuckle corner. *CHOP!* “WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” *CHOP!* “WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” *CHOP!* “WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” PRL grabs Leon and shoves him into the same turnbuckle corner! *CHOP!* “WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” *CHOP!* “WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” *CHOP!* *CHOP!* *CHOP!* *CHOP!* *CHOP!* *CHOP!* *CHOP!* *CHOP!* *CHOP!* *CHOP!* PRL whips Leon into the opposite turnbuckle corner! Leon hits the turnbuckle back-first HARD! Tha Puerto Rican follows through with a Stinger Splash onto Leon Rodez! THA PUERTO RICAN HOW YOU LIKE THAT!? PRL whips Leon into the ropes--Leon reverses, holds on, and gives PRL an Exploder Suplex! COLE Exploder Suplex! Out of nowhere! Cover! 1... 2... KICK OUT!!! PRL is now breathing hard. Leon picks P.R. up. He gives P.R. an inverted atomic drop! As PR bounces up and down holding his gonads, Leon charges forward, bounces off of the ropes, rolls through and clotheslines Tha Puerto Rican down onto the mat! COLE There went The Shack Attack! VENTURA As did Leon’s chances of becoming OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion! COLE What? Where did that come from!? What basis do you have to say that!? VENTURA It’s my opinion and I’m sticking to it! COLE Will you stop!? Leon looks at the crowd. He smiles. Rodez picks PRL up. “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” Leon gives PRL a backbreaker! He picks PRL up again. Standing dropkick! COLE Leon knows that even though he has had World Title opportunities before, this is his biggest chance, his biggest shot to grab the brass ring! Never before has Leon Rodez come this close to becoming World Heavyweight Champion, and if he loses tonight, if he fails in his quest to obtain the World Heavyweight Title, just who knows when he will get a chance like this again…if he ever does. Leon picks Tha Puerto Rican up again. One punch to the jaw sends PRL back down to the mat! VENTURA Leon Rodez has competed in Canada, in Mexico, in Germany, in the UGS, in Japan, and in the OAOAST, but he has yet to garner a World Heavyweight Title in his ENTIRE career! Tha Puerto Rican wrestled for 10 years to get to where he is today. Leon has wrestled for five and a half years. But the journey to the top for Leon Rodez has been equally as hard for him as it was for Tha Puerto Rican, if not moreso! Never before has Leon received an opportunity quite like this! Leon picks Tha Puerto Rican up again. *CHOP!* (“WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”) Leon then whips Tha Puerto Rican into the opposite ropes…PRL hits Leon with a flying clothesline, knocking him down! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” With the crowd back on their feet, PR waits to strike again. Once Leon is back to a vertical base, P.R. charges forward--and gets drop toe-holed onto the middle ring rope throat first! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” COLE Oh my. Oh boy. VENTURA Oh no. Tha Puerto Rican rests throat first on the middle ring rope. Leon has a sly smile on his face. He nods his head as he looks at the crowd. Leon does a little jig, and then charges forward, bounces off of the ropes, charges forward, leaps up…and then drives all of his body weight across Tha Puerto Rican’s spine! COLE CALL THAT BITCH BOJANGLES! VENTURA Do we really want this comedy based wrestler to represent our company as its World Heavyweight Champion!? COLE The fans don’t seem to mind the comedy! VENTURA Since when do we care what the fans want!? Because this is a special night, and because of what Tha Puerto Rican has said to him over the past month, Leon milks the cheers for all their worth, bowing to the audience, blowing kisses, and saying, “THANK YOU! THANK YOU! I LOVE YOU ALL! YOU’VE BEEN A BEAUTIFUL AUDIENCE!” He then does another jig to really stick it to Tha Puerto Rican. VENTURA Now this is getting ridiculous! This is the main event of a pay-per-view! Not Soul Train! Get back into the match, Rodez! COLE He feels like he has the match well in hand! You can’t blame him for feeling this jolly! VENTURA If you ever, EVER say jolly again, I swear to God… Leon pulls Tha Puerto Rican off of the middle ring rope by his tights and sets him down on the mat where he proceeds to stomp the holy hell out of him! He then switches to simple punches to the head, punches which elicit another pro-PRL chant! “P.R.!” “SUCKS!” “P.R.!” “SUCKS!” “P.R.” “SUCKS!” “P.R.” “SUCKS!” Well, a pro-PRL chant from about 60% of the crowd. COLE Leon Rodez doing everything he can to win this high stakes match-up! Rodez picks PRL up. Bodyslam! Leon exits the ring, and then starts climbing the top rope. COLE Leon going up top! Could it possibly be time for the 450 Splash!? Leon is hunched over on the top turnbuckle…that is until PRL bounces off of the ropes, causing Leon to lose his balance and crotch himself on the top rope! “OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” COLE Even I felt that! VENTURA How could you? COLE Leon winces in pain as he feels the throbbing pain in his Johnson right about now. PRL takes this moment to catch his breath as he rests on the ring ropes. After taking a deep breath, PRL stands upright and then nails Leon with a Rock-style punch to the temple! Another Rock punch to the temple for Rodez! PRL then delivers a knife-edged chop across the chest of Leon Rodez! “WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” At this, Leon starts slumping on the top turnbuckle, using the ring post to keep himself from falling completely off of it. COLE Certainly, Rodez did NOT want to land in that particular manner…that is, unless, he is wearing a cup…and I’ll never know the answer to that one. VENTURA Go check the man. COLE I said, I…will…never…know…the…answer…to…that…one! VENTURA But secretly, you wish you could. Admit it. COLE PRL climbs the second turnbuckle. He stands up straight, grabs Leon by his hair, looks to the crowd to salute them…and then leaps up, wrapping his legs around Leon Rodez’s head, and bringing him down onto the mat with a FRANKENSTEINER~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111 COLE Frankensteiner! Shades of Scott Steiner in his good years! VENTURA He's no Frank Bruiser. COLE Who? Both Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez lie on the mat, exhausted! Both men are now sweating and breathing hard. Charles Robinson checks on both men, and then administers his 10 count. “ONE!” “TWO!” “THREE!” COLE Remember, Tha Puerto Rican WILL retain the OAOAST Championship if this match ends in a countout or a disqualification! “FOUR!” “FIVE!” “SIX!” “SEVEN!” Tha Puerto Rican starts moving. “EIGHT!” Tha Puerto Rican gets to his hands and knees. Leon Rodez sits up. “NINE!” Leon Rodez stands up! PRL is on his left knee. Leon takes advantage of this, going for a punch--BLOCKED! Tha Puerto Rican nails Leon Rodez with a Rock-style punch to the temple! Leon staggers, but then goes for another punch--BLOCKED! PRL fires again with a left jab to the temple! And another! And another! And another! THA PUERTO RICAN BLOWS A KISS TO THE CROWD! And then fires off with yet another Rock-style punch to the temple! COLE Tha Puerto Rican MOCKING Leon Rodez on that exchange! VENTURA THERE’S Tha Puerto Rican that I know and love! PRL grabs Leon by his left hand and then delivers an Irish whip into the ropes. Leon bounces off of the ropes, right into an overhead belly-to-belly suplex from Tha Puerto Rican! Leon and PRL get right back up. Leon walks right into a Samoan Drop from Tha Puerto Rican! Afterwards, PRL applauds himself. *Some* of the crowd applauds with him. COLE Tha Puerto Rican is getting cockier. He feels the match is in his hands now! VENTURA He’s showing some of that old spark that he used to have, Cole! The spark that brought him championship after championship! PRL goes for the cover. 1...2...RIGHT SHOULDER UP!!! THA PUERTO RICAN Goddamnit. Both PR and Leon get up slowly at the same time. PR hits Leon with a Rock punch, grabs Leon by his left hand, and then whips Leon into the ropes--NO!--Leon reverses, and hits Puerto with a short armed clothesline! “YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Tha Puerto Rican KIPS UP~!!! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” THA PUERTO RICAN SURPRISE! Tha Puerto Rican nails Leon with rapid fire Rock-style punches to the temple that take Rodez into a turnbuckle corner! Punch. Punch. Punch. NOW KISS THAT LEFT~! Punch! Leon FLIES over the top rope and onto the floor! COLE Tha Puerto Rican with a surge of adrenaline knocks Leon Rodez out of the ring! VENTURA He’s got a second wind, Michael Cole! PRL takes a moment to catch his breath, a look of disdain on his face for his opponent tonight. Puerto then exits the ring. Leon is on his hands and knees on the protective mats. PRL grabs Leon by his hair and then slams his face onto the top of the announce table! VENTURA Look out! THA PUERTO RICAN GIVE UP! Tha Puerto Rican slams Leon’s face onto the top of the announce table again! THA PUERTO RICAN YOU CAN’T BEAT ME! After taking a few moments to refill his stamina meter, Tha Puerto Rican grabs Leon by his hair and by his singlet and tosses him back into the ring. A sneer etched onto his face, PRL follows Leon by sliding into the ring underneath the bottom ring rope. Once the fans see the sneer, some of them start booing. PRL stands up tall, watching Leon crawl around the ring, groggy, out of breath, and in pain. PRL decides to stop the crawling by nailing Leon with several shaky leg kicks to the back! Leon is soon lying flat on his back, so Tha Puerto Rican simply continues kicking Leon with his shaky leg kicks. He stops to “smell the electricity”…and draws boos. “P.R. SUCKS!” “P.R. SUCKS!” “P.R. SUCKS!” “P.R. SUCKS!” COLE There’s something that I thought that I would never hear again. VENTURA Apparently, if you put a gun to a fans’ head and told them to choose between Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez, 95% of them would choose Leon Rodez. Ain’t that something? COLE He’s got a lot of fans, but so does Tha Puerto Rican. But it looks like the Leon fans are making their voices heard right now! THA PUERTO RICAN Come on jabroni. PRL picks up Leon Rodez. He looks to the crowd, and then goes for a punch--BLOCKED! Leon hits Tha Puerto Rican with a jab! A jab! A jab! A jab! Rodez turns, blows a kiss to the crowd, before turning back on his heels… *SMACK!* …and hitting Tha Puerto Rican with an Enziguri~!!! COLE MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT! Tha Puerto Rican Flair Flops onto the mat! LEON YEAH-UH~!!! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Leon picks Tha Puerto Rican up, whose eyes are glazed over. Leon applies a front facelock on Tha Puerto Rican, puts PRL’s right arm over his head, grabs his tights and then goes for a vertical suplex…except Tha Puerto Rican won’t budge. So, Leon tries again. PRL still won’t budge. Finally, Leon tries one more time, only for PRL to not budge, and instead deliver a vertical suplex on Leon Rodez! PRL holds on, rolls through, and then delivers a second vertical suplex on Leon Rodez! PRL holds on, rolls through again, and then lifts Leon up for a third vertical suplex…but just holds him up. The crowd is in awe as PRL continues holding Leon Rodez up in the air, letting the blood rush to his head. Some fans even applaud. VENTURA Incredible strength. Look at that, Michael Cole! COLE The World Heavyweight Champion showing off his strength to the worldwide audience! Tha Puerto Rican holds Leon up in the air for a few more seconds. PRL does the “You Can’t See Me!” hand gesture, and then walks towards the ropes, drops Leon stomach-first onto the top ring rope, and then follows that up with the third suplex, a slingshot suplex! Afterwards, Tha Puerto Rican sits up and applauds himself. Some of the fans applaud him too. COLE Tha Puerto Rican with his patented People’s Trifecta! Two rolling vertical suplexes followed by the slingshot suplex! VENTURA A combination straight from the mind of Tha Puerto Rican! PR rolls through, and then goes for the cover, hooking Leon’s right leg. 1! 2! KICK OUT!!!! THA PUERTO RICAN Shit! PRL slowly gets up, as does Leon Rodez. PRL goes to pick Leon up, but gets punched in the face by Leon! Leon nails PRL with a knife-edged chop across the chest! (“WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”) And another! (“WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”) Leon charges backwards, bounces off of the ropes, charges forward, PRL goes for a clothesline, Leon ducks, charges forward, bounces off of the opposite ropes, AND GETS THROWN OVER THE TOP ROPE AND ONTO THE FLOOR! Leon rolls and rolls until his back hits the barricade! COLE Tha Puerto Rican back on offense! VENTURA He’s fighting. Leon’s fighting. This match is better than I thought that it would be! PRL paces back and forth inside of the ring and lets out a mighty yell. COLE Tha Puerto Rican used Rodez’s momentum to take him over the top! Leon is down and the referee has started his 10 count! VENTURA Leon was *too* fast! *Too* quick! P.R. exits the ring. He has a sneer on his face as he watches Leon Rodez slowly try to get up. Rather than do anything, PRL simply throws Leon back into the ring underneath the bottom ring rope. PRL slides back into the ring underneath the bottom ring rope. Cover. It gets two! PRL sits up. THA PUERTO RICAN What the hell was that!? CHARLES ROBINSON TWO! THA PUERTO RICAN Thanks, jackass. P.R. gets up, grabbing Leon by his hair and picking him up as he gets up himself. Puerto gives Leon a snapmare takeover, and then applies a chinlock on Rodez! COLE Tha Puerto Rican is the aggressor. He fought tooth and nail everyday of his life for 10 years to win the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title at AngleMania VII. He has been the Champ for 8 months now, and if he wins tonight, he will extend it to 9 months! VENTURA Tha Puerto Rican has changed his gameplan here. Tha Puerto Rican now applying the pressure on The Silky Smooth One, trying to slow the momentum of the challenger. I have to admit, so far, solid gameplan by both men! PRL cinches the chinlock on tight. Leon is fading fast. Charles Robinson checks on Leon’s state. PRL continues tightening the hold. The chinlock weakens Leon enough that he is soon lying on the mat. Rodez tries desperately to reach the ropes, but he is too far away from them. CHARLES ROBINSON Do you give up? LEON … CHARLES ROBINSON Do you give up? LEON … Leon flails his hands around, but soon gets too weak to even do that. Soon, Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez are both on the mat, Leon still trapped in the chinlock. COLE Leon is the bigger of the two, but Tha Puerto Rican has more weight. VENTURA Not that much though. PR is only two pounds heavier than Leon. COLE But sometimes the littlest things can make all of the difference in the world! VENTURA Do shut up. The crowd is starting to get loud. Leon is stomping his feet on the mat. PRL has a look of determination mixed with anger on his face. He cinches the chinlock tighter. THA PUERTO RICAN I own your ass. COLE Tha Puerto Rican is the favourite, at least in most people’s estimations, going into this match-up! VENTURA And he’s proving why he is the favourite, and why he has been the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion for the majority of this year, right now! Charles Robinson checks on Leon Rodez. Leon weakly flails his arms and legs around. Soon, he isn’t moving any body part. THA PUERTO RICAN I got him! Leons’ eyes are shut. PRL has a tiny smile form on his face. COLE The sold out Honda Center watching the main event of OAOAST November Reign 2008! Fans, thanks for ordering this spectacular event LIVE on pay-per-view! We really appreciate you choosing to end your Thanksgiving weekend with us here in the One And Only AngleSault Thread! And just who will represent the OAOAST as our World Heavyweight Champion after tonight? Charles Robinson checks Leon Rodez. He raises Leon’s left arm into the air. It falls. “ONE!” VENTURA That’s one. Charles Robinson checks Leon Rodez. He raises Leon’s left arm into the air again. It falls. “TWO!” THA PUERTO RICAN Ring the bell! COLE It may be over! Leon’s dream of becoming World Heavyweight Champion may be CRUSHED here tonight at November Reign! VENTURA He’s in big trouble now, Cole. Charles Robinson checks Leon Rodez. He raises Leon’s left arm into the air one more time. It fal-- “NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! TWO!” “YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Leon starts shaking his fists. PRL is stunned. Leon sits up on the mat! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” PRL is shaking his head as Leon gets to his left knee, still trapped in the chinlock! Leon quickly gets to his two feet, still trapped in the deadly chinlock! Leon walks around while trapped in the chinlock as the crowd gets louder and louder. COLE Leon’s fighting back up! He’s trying to relieve that pressure, get back to his vertical base! Leon walks in circles while in the chinlock, until he simply elbows PRL in the gut to break the chinlock! Rodez punches P.R. in the face several times! The punches take PRL into the ropes. Leon whips PR into the opposite ropes. Leon fires with a standing dropkick!…that doesn’t connect as Tha Puerto Rican holds onto the ropes! COLE Short trip, bad landing there! PRL grabs Leon’s legs, pulls on the kneepads so that he has a better grasp of Leon’s legs…and then catapults Leon Rodez into a top turnbuckle pad! VENTURA CATAPULT~! Leon stumbles out from the turnbuckle corner, right into a clothesline from Tha Puerto Rican which knocks him down! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE And some of our fans are none too happy that Tha Puerto Rican is back in control! Tha Puerto Rican stops to catch his breath in the same turnbuckle corner Leon was just in. He sneers at Leon. “P.R. SUCKS!” “P.R. SUCKS!” PR snorts, cranks his neck, and then goes back to work, picking Leon up by his hair. The World Champion drags Leon into position before scooping and slamming him. Tha Puerto Rican points to the top and starts to head up, to another mixed reaction. COLE PRL going to take a risk here, heading to the third floor. Scaling the turnbuckles, Tha Puerto Rican gets his footing up on the top rope and stares down at his challenger. Slowly PRL removes his left elbow pad and throws it into the crowd. He then leaps off of the top rope, doing the "Up yours!" hand gesture while in mid-air... ...and DROPPING the big elbow!! COLE He hit it! People's Elbow Drop, although whether the People are happy to see it is another matter. PRL hooks the leg... 1... 2... NO!! VENTURA I gotta question that move Michael. Okay, it got the World Champion a nearfall, but so far he's done a good job of protecting that injured bicep. I don't think dropping an elbow from that high up is gonna do those muscles and ligaments one bit of good. PRL picks himself back up, stomping away at Leon as he sizes up his next move. "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" Suddenly the Anaheim crowd get into it again, distracting the World Champion for a moment. PRL reaches down and drags Leon off the canvas, putting him in a front facelock. THA PUERTO RICAN THIS IS WHAT I THINK OF 'LE - ON'... *WHAM!* Tha Puerto Rican spikes Leon with a quick DDT. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Flipping his opponent over PRL smirks at the fans routing against him as he makes his cover... 1... 2... NO!! VENTURA Tha Puerto Rican's gotta keep his cool here. You can't let these people get under your skin. Unfortunately, that seems to be exactly what PRL is doing as he walks over to the ropes and makes a big show of telling the people that it's over. Mostly boos greet him, as he walks back over and grabs hold of Leon. Up on one knee, Leon surprises PRL with a punch to the gut though! A small, hopeful cheer goes up, as Leon lands another punch! And another! Suddenly back up, The Silky Smooth One then surprises PRL with another Inverted Atomic Drop! "YYYEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!!" Turning on his heels, Rodez quickly hits the ropes. Tucking and rolling, he throws the clothesline... ...BUT GETS CAUGHT AND DRIVEN WITH A SPINEBUSTER!!!! COLE Uh-oh! Tha Puerto Rican was prepared for the Shack Attack on this occassion. And now, we might be about to see it! PRL stands over Leon's body, jawing with the crowd as he starts to remove his elbowpad... which is when Leon suddenly kicks up and shocks him with a pinning cradle... COLE HEY! HEY! 1... 2... NO!!! Scrambling to his feet, Tha Puerto Rican manages to cut Rodez off with a quick clothesline! The World Champion looks furious at getting caught though, even despite the kickout, and starts to stomp away at Leon with furious speed until the referee pulls him off. COLE Just like you said Jesse, PRL can't afford to be pre-occupied with this capacity crowd. VENTURA It only takes three seconds to get pinned. And it only takes one second taking your eye off the ball to wind up in trouble. Spitting mad, Tha Puerto Rican picks Leon back up. He unloads with a few punches before grabbing the wrist, whipping the challenger hard into the turnbuckles. Out staggers Leon, as Tha Puerto Rican charges in, looking for the Stinger Splash... NO! CAUGHT! Fear fills the eyes of the World Heavyweight Champion as he finds himself caught in Leon's clutches and thrown overhead... ...WITH AN EXPLODER SUPLEX INTO THE TURNBUCKLES!!!!!!!!!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" COLE OH MY!!! PRL is motionless, as both he and Leon lay flat out on the canvas. "HO - LY SHIT!" "HO - LY SHIT!" "HO - LY SHIT!" "HO - LY SHIT!" VENTURA Unbelievable move! The World Heavyweight Champion hitting those solid steel turnbuckles, before coming crashing down on the top of his head for good measure. We might have a new Champion right here and now if Rodez can just get the cover! Charles Robinson checks on the two men and with few signs of life from either, he has to lay another count on. “ONE!” “TWO!” “THREE!” COLE That suplex took a lot of energy out of Leon as well, unable to capitalise here. “FOUR!” “FIVE!” Finally Leon starts to stir. The crowd will him on, as he rolls over, dropping on top of PRL... ...not realising the Champ is lying face down. “SIX!” “SEVEN!” Hauling PRL over onto his back, Leon flops on top again, able to weakly hook a leg... 1... 2... KICKOUT!! VENTURA No, Leon just took way too much time in following up. COLE This has been a gruelling match so far, as you'd expect from these two great athletes, fighting over the richest prize in the OAOAST! As Leon starts to pick himself up using the ropes, PRL wisely or luckily rolls underneath the bottom rope and to the floor. VENTURA There's a break. Leon is forced to roll out of the ring after PRL and dumps him back inside. Climbing back to the apron, he decides to head for the top. As Tha Puerto Rican picks himself up, Leon gets his feet on the top rope and soars with a Crossbody... 1... PRL ROLLS THROUGH... 1... 2... NO! Both men get back up and it's Leon who scores with a boot to the gut. Leon double underhooks the arm... but PRL spins free and sends Leon off with an irish whi... NO, reversed. PRL comes back off the ropes and gets caught with a SPINEBUSTER! COLE Oh, surely not! Positioning himself by PR's head Rodez smirks, the crowd already knowing what's coming. The Silky Smooth One pulls his elbowpad off and skims it into the ninth row, before doing some very weird hand signals. VENTURA Of all the moves. COLE Of all the insults, here it is, the most silky smooth move in professional wrestling today! Bouncing off the ropes, Leon leaps up and over PRL and bounces off the opposite ropes. Slowing down, Leon stops and "smells the electricity"... then throws up the Badd Boyz' "Killa B" hand signal... before slapping his hands together, miming laying the smackdown on someone... after which, he gives a "that's it" signal... and then, he applauds himself... prior to bending down and telling PRL "you can't see me"... COLE Boy, PR's got a lot of taunts, don't he? Leon stops and tries to recall if there's anything else to parody, before dropping the elbow... BUT PRL MOVES OUT OF THE WAY!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" VENTURA Well what the hell did he expect? Shaking out his arm, Leon turns right into PRL, who picks him off his feet with a double leg takedown. With a hold of the ankles he then steps through and applies the SHARPSHOOTER!! Leon struggles to avoid it but PRL is able to turn him and lock the hold in anyway! COLE SHARPSHOOTER! VENTURA He's not got it fully locked in though Michael. Sure enough, by the time PRL is able to sit down on the hold Leon has managed to scramble his way close to the ropes. Tha Puerto Rican puts the pressure on, but it's only a few inches more for Leon to drag the World Champion, before reaching out... and grabbing the bottom rope. "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!" VENTURA Leon knew that Sharpshooter was coming and didn't bother wasting energy trying to fight it, he went immediately for the ropes so once the hold was put on he'd be in a prime position to force a quick escape. Smart move on his part. Using the ropes, Rodez picks himself back up. Shaking out his arm, Leon turns around, right into the waiting arms of PRL WHO DRILLS HIM WITH THE LATIN SLAM!! COLE Got him with the Latin Slam! Hook of the leg by PRL... 1... 2... SHOULDER UP!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" Looking shocked Tha Puerto Rican gets right in the face of the referee as he holds up two fingers. COLE PRL is getting frustrated Jess. VENTURA We've seen in the past couple of weeks signs of the old PRL, some have said a desperate PRL. I'm not sure about that but you do sense some sort of insecurity ever since he went down with that bicep injury. PRL finally lets up on Charles Robinson and goes back to Leon. He drags his challenger up and nails him with a punch. And another. And a third. Once Leon's dazed, Tha Puerto Rican then scoops and slams Leon, dead centre of the ring. Scowling at his opponent PRL yells that he's going to 'show him how it's done'... …and then kicks Leon's right arm onto his chest. VENTURA Here we go. Tha Puerto Rican removes his right elbow pad and throws it into the crowd. He then does some weird hand signals and then bounces off of the ropes, leaps over Leon, and then bounces off of the opposite ropes. COLE It's now time for the real most electrifying move in professional wrestling, The Puerto Rico Elbow! Tha Puerto Rican stops dead in his tracks. He turns to the crowd and blows a two-handed kiss... ...BUT LEON AVOIDS THE ELBOW DROP!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Nobody home on the Puerto Rico Elbow either!! VENTURA You don't see that every day. COLE You sure don't, when was the last time PRL didn't land with the Puerto Rico Elbow, the Intensezone Elbow, whatever you want to call it. It's not often I can tell you that for a fact! As PRL gets back up, Leon is waiting with a double leg takedown... AND TURNS PRL OVER INTO THE LIONTAMER!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE LIONTAMER, THIS COULD BE IT! With the knee pinned in the back Tha Puerto Rican is trapped and starts to freak out as the pain sets in. Rodez nods his head, feeling victory in his grasp. Charles Robinson drops down, asking PRL if he wants to quit. Wagging his finger, PRL yells "NO", but the pain on his face says different. "TAP!" "TAP!" "TAP!" "TAP!" No support comes from the crowd for PRL as he continues to suffer in the hold, making no big moves towards the ropes. Leon continues to pull back on the legs trying to get the submission... but suddenly lets it go as LANDON MADDIX HITS THE RING!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" VENTURA What in the hell? COLE What in the hell is right, what is Maddix doing out here!? Referee Robinson intercepts Landon as he tries to get in the ring, distracted Leon. That allows Tha Puerto Rican time to recover and catch Leon turning around with a quick Jawbreaker! As Leon falls to his knees PRL struggles back up, back aching. Meanwhile, JAMES BLONDE is out as well, taking over distraction duties allowing Landon to act innocent for long enough to escape detection when he rolls into the ring with a steel chair. COLE I don't understand this at all! Weilding the chair, Landon waves Leon to his feet. PRL has his back to this and gives the signal, "that's it", calling for the end. He then turns around... ...and JUST SNATCHES THE CHAIR FROM LANDON BEFORE IT HITS LEON!! VENTURA Neither do I now. Landon starts to yell at PRL, insisting that he's just trying to help him... *CRACK!* ...BUT PRL SILENCES HIM WITH A CHAIRSHOT! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Picking Landon up, PRL sends him flying up and over the top to the floor and dusts his hands in satisfaction. COLE Okay that was strange. Referees rush out to take care of Landon and Blonde, as the action continues in the ring. PRL waits for Rodez and sets him up for the LATIN SLA... NO! Leon elbows his way out! Staggering around with his equilibrium momentarily messed up, Tha Puerto Rican walks into a boot. Leon grabs on a front facelock and grabs hold of PRL's waistband. COLE PR Nightmare!? ...NO! PRL spins out and pulls Leon forward looking for a Short Arm Clothesline... but Leon ducks and counters with a Blue Thunder Bomb! COLE IT'S DA BOOM! 1... 2... NO!!! Looking weary, Rodez rests on the turnbuckles for a couple of seconds before heading up top. COLE Leon going up again, but PRL is too far away for the 450, not sure what he's looking for here. VENTURA Looks like we'll never know. Before Leon can reach the top Tha Puerto Rican finds a burst of energy and recovers, catching Leon with a shot to the gut. Leon sits on the top turnbuckle as PRL reaches up to deliver a couple more punches before beginning to follow his challenger up. The crowd rise to their feet expecting something big. PRL gives Leon a couple more shots from the middle rope and grabs a front facelock, only for Leon to fight back. COLE We've got a battle on the turnbuckles breaking out. After a couple of more shots to the gut, Leon aims a kick at PRL and sends him crashing backwards off the turnbuckles and to the canvas! COLE Look out, Tha Puerto Rican is in deep trouble now. The crowd rise up as Leon gets his footing on the top rope again. Lining PRL up, he then takes off... ...450 SPLASH... ...MISSES!!!! "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Tha Puerto Rican is able to roll out of the way at the last second, leaving Rodez to bounce off the unforgiving canvas!! COLE Man, nobody home! VENTURA That could be the beginning of the end right there. Went for it all and got nothing. Leon staggers back up, holding his ribs. Waiting on him is PRL, coiled like a rattlesnake waiting to strike. As Leon walks in he takes a boot to the gut. PRL grabs the head and sinches up on Leon's singlet, to a shriek from the crowd. THA PUERTO RICAN JOKE'S OVER PEOPLE... JOKE'S OVER!! PRL sets... ...but Leon spins out the side door and CATCHES PRL WITH AN INSIDE CRADLE!!! COLE WAIT! 1... 2... 3 NO, ONLY TWO!!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE Oh my word how close was that!? VENTURA We were less than a half a second away Michael. Less than a half-second away from a new World Heavyweight Champion! COLE PRL almost become the BUTT of the joke! As both men get back to their feet PRL swings with a right hand, but Leon ducks and traps PRL in a SLEEPER! After flailing around for a second PRL counters though, running to the turnbuckles and ducking down to slam Leon's face into the turnbuckle pads. Rodez stumbles away from the corner and Tha Puerto Rican, seeing his chance, pounces... KICK! *WHAM!* CAPPA KIL... NO! Leon shoves PRL off, countering the Stunner... ...but PRL comes back off the ropes with the spinning Gamengiri kick, catching Leon flush in the forehead!! COLE DODGE THIS, BITCH!! And Leon couldn't! A weary PRL makes the cover... 1... 2... KICKOUT! "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" Sitting up, deep breaths are taken by Tha Puerto Rican. He wipes the sweat from his face and pushes back up to his feet, lying in wait for Leon to get back up. The World Champion stands hunched over, until he finds the energy to signal "that's it". THA PUERTO RICAN GET UP! GET UP! COLE Tha Puerto Rican just begging Leon to get back to his feet, ready to put him away. "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" Ignoring the chants, PRL shuffles anxiously on the balls of his feet. He waves Leon up as he reaches one knee, also feeling the effects of fatigue as he falls back down. PRL begins to get impatient and waves Leon up again. Finally, Leon starts to draw on the support of the crowd, who might regret their chants as he reaches his feet, turning around into a boot to the gut and getting caught in a front facelo... ...NO! LEON TRIPS PRL UP AND APPLIES THE LIONTA... ...NO!! PRL GRABS LEON'S HEAD AND PULLS HIM INTO AN INSIDE CRADLE... 1... 2... KICKOUT!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Both men are back up and PRL lands with a boot again. He pulls Leon into the facelock, grabs the singlet and lifts him up... ...but Leon kicks his feet until they find their way back onto the mat!! PRL takes a deep breath and tries again... ...but AGAIN, Leon gets his feet back down!! COLE Look at this, Leon fighting the PR Nightmare with every last ounce of energy in his body! VENTURA PRL just cannot get him, how frustrating must this be!? PRL goes to lift again... but Leon finally backdrops his way out! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE PRL couldn't apply the PR Nightmare! As Tha Puerto Rican gets back up, Leon hooks him in a 3/4 facelock and points to the turnbuckles. He runs him forward... ...but PRL shoves Leon off, sending him chest-first into the turnbuckles! The breath is knocked out of Leon, allowing Tha Puerto Rican a couple of second to regain his. PRL then dodges past Leon, running to the corner in front of them. Grabbing the top ring ropes Tha Puerto Rican pushes off, looking to float up and over The Silky Smooth One. But he doesn't make it all the way over and much to his shock finds himself sat on Leon's shoulders in an electric chair position. COLE Uh-oh. Victory roll? VENTURA I don't think so Michael, I don't think this is what PRL had in mind somehow. It's soon clear that PRL isn't in control, as Leon starts to walk away from the corner with the World Champion's arms waving frantically. Stopping in the middle of the ring, Leon then reaches up... and hooks his hands behind the back of PRL's head. COLE What is this!? With PRL trapped, Leon glances to the crowd one last time... *WHAM!* ...BEFORE SITTING OUT AND DROPPING PRL RIGHT ON THE BACK OF HIS HEAD!!!!!!!!!!! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" COLE VENTURA COUNT! 1... 2... 3!!!!!!!!!! "YYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" VENTURA ...WE'VE GOT A NEW WORLD CHAMPION!!!! The crowd go NUTS as the bell sounds, barely audible in the arena. Fans literally jump for joy in the stands as Leon lets go of the legs of Tha Puerto Rican and flops backwards on the mat, completely spent. COLE AFTER FIVE AND A HALF YEARS, LEON RODEZ HAS FINALLY CLIMBED THE OAOAST MOUNTAIN! AND HE IS NOW THE NEW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!! "Rock The Casbah" blares over the speakers as Tha Puerto Rican rolls slowly out of the ring defeated. With almost as little energy, Leon struggles back to his feet and looks around the ecstatic sea of fans as referee Charles Robinson helps him up and raises his hand in victory! "YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Leon falls back to one knee clenching his fists, before finding the energy to climb the turnbuckles and salute the crowd. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the match... and the NEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWW ONE AND ONLY ANGLESAULT THREAD... HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WOOOOORRRRRRRLLLLDD... "SILKY SMOOTH"... LLLLLLEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOONN... RRRROOOOOOOOODDEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZ!!!! "YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE AND THAT'S NO JOKE! As Leon climbs another set of turnbuckles, referee Charles Robinson retrieves the World Heavyweight Title from ringside. But Tha Puerto Rican rolls himself back into the ring and stops him in his tracks, whispering something in his ear before taking the title belt from him. Leon steps back off the turnbuckles and turns around with a relieved sigh, only to find Tha Puerto Rican with the belt in hand. VENTURA I'd yell for him to "waffle him" right now, but I'll bet he won't. COLE I certainly hope he doesn't do that! With Leon breathing heavily, Tha Puerto Rican stands with his right hand pressed against his neck and the belt hanging loosely in his left arm which is clearly giving him some trouble as well. PRL leans in and says something to Leon which isn't quite picked up by the cameras. But whatever it is must be complimentary, as he can me seen mouthing the words "YOU EARNED IT"... before handing the belt over and shaking Leon's hand. "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" VENTURA Eh. COLE And after weeks of confrontation, ultimately Tha Puerto Rican with a show of humility. After everything he's said in the past few weeks, tonight Tha Puerto Rican realises he was wrongs. As Leon Rodez proved once and for all that he is truly NO JOKE! VENTURA Well even I've gotta give it to Tha Puerto Rican for fighting through that bicep injury and putting in such a great effort. They both did. And I guess this is a fitting end to a great match... ya know, if you like this sort of thing. PRL says some more words to Leon, holding up one finger seeming to signal that he wants one more shot down the road, before raising Leon's hand as he shrugs figuring maybe his opponent ain't so bad after all. After a last pat on the back, Tha Puerto Rican then leaves the ring still nursing his injuries. That leaves Leon to look at the OAOAST Title in his hands, holding it up to eye level and kissing it. VENTURA Must have seen his reflection in it. As PRL leaves, bodies pass him in the aisle as D*LUX and JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN hit the ring, Shayne with his broken arm in a cast of course. As Jade helps him into the ring, Tyler slides in ahead and is the first to embrace his buddy on his victory, to another loud cheer from the Anaheim crowd. Leon embraces Shayne a little more carefully, what with the broken arm and all, before Jade throws himself into her uncle's arms to the biggest cheer of them all. "YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE WHAT A SCENE! WHAT A NIGHT! The celebration party continue to pile into the ring, including BOHEMOTH, who after congratulating Leon summons Jumbo over from the pack to help him lift Leon up onto his shoulders! Leon raises the World Title up, before he's suddenly put back down. The crowd of OAOASTers step aside to let ZACK MALIBU past. The Franchise of the OAOAST has a big smile on his face as he steps back, taking a look at his long-time tag team partner with the OAOAST World Title over his shoulder. Zack then extends a hand. Sure enough they shake and then hug to applause from everybody else in the ring. COLE Ladies and gentlemen, we hope you've enjoyed November Reign 2008! As the celebrations continue, this is Michael Cole and Jesse The Body Ventura saying thank you for joining us and we will see you on TSM for HeldDOWN, for the first night of the Silky Smooth Era in the OAOAST!! Thank you and goodnight from Anaheim! With the OAOAST wrestlers and personalities still surrounding him Leon raises the OAOAST World Championship to the crowd, our final shot as we FADE OUT

Over the river and through the woods to...that's not the right intro! * DUN DUN DUN DUNNA, DUN DUN DUNNA * TV MA (fuck this 14 shit we do it raw dog!) L, V PRESENTED IN HD Across a river, over a bunch of mountains, through fields, sweeping past trees and bushes, hovering over the skyline of New York City, the OAOAST logo flies through the air...before sweeping down, brushing past an elderly man who seems understandably shocked to see six over-sized letters fly past him. The logo continues going, nearing a house...which luckily, a woman is leaving, meaning the logo can sweep through the open door, continuing on down the hallfway and into the living room where a young kid is sat on his computer. It sweeps past him, hitting the computer...which explodes with a flash, lighting up much to the kid's shock and delight. THE OAOAST...WHAT THE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD IS READING~! Man I was all set to say fuck the booking thread and do this intro with another song but my nigga KC CAME SLICK with this theme song. Props to that dude! This is the way you left me, I'm not pretending. No hope, no love, no glory, No Happy Ending. This is the way that we love, Like it's forever. Then live the rest of our life, But not together. The scene is an unfinished basement, a dark, dank, are, it’s the type of place no child would go into alone and few adults would want to either. The walls are barely walls of any human construction, made mostly out of rocks embedded into ground. The ceiling, or what can be seen of it, is worn down tired wood and it’s a wonder how the rest of the house stays aloft. In this underground dungeon the grey cracked and moldy concrete floor is littered with boxes. Covered in dust, its obvious most of these have gone untouched and their contents long forgotten. Through a small window the slightest hint of daylight creeps in. It may be small but its enough to shine down upon a dust shrouded picture frame. Through the grey cloak, we can see a group picture of the OAOAST roster. Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life Can't get no love without sacrifice If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell Theodore Moneymaker is seen walking through the darkened halls of his old prep school’s athletic wing. With hands in his pocket, and his face expressing more vulnerability than ever before, he lip syncs the sorrowful words to the song. The view switches to a lower profile shot, where although he only see his arm and torso we can see a trophy case that also honors his many records in varsity football, lacrosse and wrestling. This is the hardest story that I've ever told No hope, or love, or glory Happy endings gone forever more I feel as if I'm wasted Another dreary and depressing setting is shown, this time an overhead view of an empty minor league hockey arena; the only light shining from a window to the lobby. We go to a wideshot of Tyler Bryant clad in his full high school hockey gear, singing as he sits alone at the edge of the bench nearly off screen. This is the way you left me, I'm not pretending. No hope, no love, no glory, No Happy Ending. This is the way that we love, Like it's forever. Then live the rest of our life, But not together. 2 o'clock in the morning, something's on my mind Can't get no rest; keep walkin' around If I pretend that nothin' ever went wrong, I can get to my sleep I can think that we just carried on Bohemoth stands on an empty stage in auditorium with an audience of zero. A few spot lights beam down on him as we see him flexing shirtless from the back. Beneath these few pieces of illumination reads a banner “ARNOLD BODYBUILDING CLASSIC 1999” This is the hardest story that I've ever told No hope, or love, or glory Happy endings gone forever more I feel as if I'm wasted And I'm wastin' every day This is the way you left me, I'm not pretending. No hope, no love, no glory, No Happy Ending. This is the way that we love, Like it's forever. Then live the rest of our life, But not together. Its sunset over a Southern California soccer field ripe with lush finely manicured green grass. Gazing out into this beautiful expanse of sport and nature is Alix Maria Spezia. We see her from a medium profile shot, leaning against the goal post, wearing her UCLA goalie outfit, singing as he stares off into space. A Little bit of love, little bit of love Little bit of love, little bit of love[repeat] I feel as if I'm wasted And I waste everyday Zack Malibu sits on a blue mat in the middle of a Tae Kwon Do Dojo. In his hands rest his black belt, earned over years of intense training. He looks down solemnly at the piece of fabric and then stares upwards with wistful, dreamy but still saddened eyes. This is the way you left me, I'm not pretending. No hope, no love, no glory, No Happy Ending. This is the way that we love, Like it's forever. To live the rest of our life, But not together. We fade out on the roster picture we saw earlier. With the dust gone, we see that’s its full of OAOAST stars holding various sports equipment from their youth, in remembrance of who they are before they sold their soul to the OAOAST devil. Except for Tony Brannigan because apparently Tony149 thinks HE’S TO COOL to play organized sports like us simple folks! You think you’re better than me, Tony? Is that it? Is that what you think? Yo, fuck you dude! Our opening video fades into an arena filled to capacity with rowdy Orange County denizens ready for another wonderful OAOAST production. Orange and gold pyro sparklers sizzle on the entry way as the November Reign logo, beautifully designed by KC, flashes on the oversized video screens in front of an entrance ramp highlighted with blue and red lights. COLE Ladies and gentlemen we hope you have had a great Thanksgiving weekend! But the holiday is over and hell has arrived here at November Reign! Someone will reign supreme and someone will bow down to the king! COACH What’s with the all hyped up intro? COLE I’m excited! Excited for November Reign, baby! COACH The hell is wrong with you? Did someone lace your morning cup of semen with caffeine? Did Zack Malibu sprinkle extra angel dust on his piece before you sucked it? YADA YADA CLAK CLAK! Rock Your Baby hits, and the lights go out, as the multicolored disco ball lowers and the arena fills with a misty, haze-like smoke. Several disco dancers come through the curtains and get their groove on (as seen from 3:10-5:13 in the video above), then Vinny Valentine leads out his team, stopping on the way to groove with some of the female dancers. COLE Quite an entrance by Vinny Valentine, leading his team out for an elimination match! Let's go to Michael Buffer! BUFFER The following contest is a five-on-five elimination match! Making their way to the ring, accompanied by Tony Tourettes, at a combined weight of 1,132 pounds...TRYST AT MARDI GRAS! Led by team captain...VVVVVVVVVVVVINNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLENTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNN NNNNNNNEEEEEEEEE!!!!! BIFFFFFFFFFFFFF ATLASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! KENNNNNNNNNNNNN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNTERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! And the the team of RICO DE JANIERO and "SWEET" LUCIUS SOUL...the MARDI GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMEWRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRECKING CREWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!! Vinny rolls into the ring and dances, then gets into a huddle with all of his teammates as well as Tony. After a brief discussion, Tony then yanks the mic away from Michael Buffer. COACH Uh-oh! TONY ALL RIGHT, TRYST AT MARDI GRAS IS FUCKING READY! GET OUT HERE AND GET YOUR FAT FAGGOT ASSES KICKED! Tony drops the mic, as Sweet Home Chicago hits, and Jumbo leads his team out. COLE And here comes Jumbo's team, will they in fact meet the demise that Tony has predicted? We're about to find out! BUFFER Their opponents...at a combined weight of 1,535 pounds...DISCO DEMOLITION! Led by the team captain...JUMMMMMMMMMBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! DEUCE DEUCE BIGELOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!! DENNNNNNNZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSPENCCCCCCCCCCCCCERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!! REGGIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNT!!!!! and "AFTER HOURS" FFFFFFFFFFFFELIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXXXXXXX STRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRUTTERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!! Jumbo's team takes a lap around the ring, and slaps hands with the fans, then enter the ring, and huddle up in the corner, before stepping out. At that point, Lucius attacks Deuce from behind! *DING DING DING* COLE And we're underway! Deuce quickly fights back on Lucius, backing him into the ropes, then tagging in Jumbo. Jumbo and Deuce whip Lucius across, then follow him into the ropes, and when Lucius bounces back off, he doesn't see anyone! Lucius looks around, then turns around into a double clothesline! COLE COACH Oh, for crying out loud. Deuce whips Lucius into a corner, and hits a handspring elbow, then tags in Strutter, who comes in as Lucius staggers out, and sends a foot to the gut, then hooks him...and drives him with the THUNDER BAY THROTTLE~!!!!!11111 COLE Whoa, we may have one already! 1... 2... 3!!! COACH I can't believe it! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 1st elimination: "Sweet" Lucius Soul eliminated by: "After Hours" Felix Strutter (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Strutter gets up and raises his arms, but gets attacked from behind by Biff Atlas, who knocks him to the mat with a double axhandle. COACH OK, here we go! Biff'll get things under control! COLE Maybe record time here, it's already 5-on-4! Biff stomps away on Felix, then picks him up and whips him into the ropes, hitting him with a running high knee! COACH Always Wear Safety Goggles, Cole! COLE ...I do. COACH What do you need goggles for? COLE Well... COACH Never mind, don't answer that. Biff then climbs to the top rope. COACH Uh-oh, could be the Safetysault! Biff comes down in attempt for the SAFETYSAULT~!!!, but Felix rolls out of the way! COLE And as usual, comes up empty! Felix tags in Reggie, who comes in and delivers right hands to the midsection, then backs into the ropes, and floors him with a clothesline! And another! And a third! He then backs up, and hits Biff with a BICYCLE KICK~! COLE And Vinny's team in a VERY bad way here! Reggie plays to the crowd, then makes his way back over to Biff, who delivers a thumb to the eye. Biff then whips Reggie into a corner, and charges, but Reggie gets a foot up! COLE And right into the foot of Reggie Lamont! Reggie quickly tags in Denzel, who steps through, then charges Biff and jumps, placing his right knee against Biff's face, then grabbing him behind the head with his right hand and dropping to the mat, driving Biff's face into his knee! COACH Wow! COLE Denzel's knee right into the face of Biff! Cover... 1... 2... 3!!! COACH Oh no! COLE And another one down! Jumbo's team on a roll! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 2nd elimination: Biff Atlas eliminated by: Denzel Spencer (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rico sneaks into the ring, and floors Denzel with a BIG clothesline! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Rico with a nice clothesline, but it only gets two! COACH Well, they better get a pin here soon, it's now 5 against 3! Rico executes a gutwrench suplex, then backs into the ropes, and hits him with a big elbow! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Rico picks up Denzel, and backs him into the ropes, where he makes a blind tag to Deuce. COLE Tag made there, I don't think Rico knows it! Rico whips Denzel across, and drops down, then attempts a clothesline, which Denzel ducks, but gets caught with a powerslam! However, Rico runs right into Deuce, who scoops him onto his shoulders...and executes the BOOTY CALL~!!!!!!1111 COLE And Deuce with the Booty Call! 1... 2... 3!!! COACH I can't believe this. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 3rd elimination: Rico de Janiero eliminated by: Deuce Deuce Bigelow (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE And now it's just Vinny and Ken Pantera against Jumbo's entire team! It's gonna take a miracle here for the Tryst at Mardi Gras to pull out a win! However, Vinny surprises Deuce off the top with a MISSILE DROPKICK~! COACH Whoa, they may get one here, though! 1... 2... Kickout! COLE No, two-count! Vinny backs up, and drills Deuce with a Shining Wizard! COACH Vinny puts on his Boogie Shoes, and maybe gets Deuce now! 1... 2... Kickout! COLE But Deuce comes out again! Vinny stomps away on Deuce, until he's flat on the mat, then climbs to the top. COACH He won't if Vinny hits this, Cole! Vinny comes off for NIGHT FEVER~!!!!!11111...but Deuce rolls out of the way! COLE But he doesn't! Deuce hits s Ghetto Blaster on Vinny, then tags in Denzel, who picks him up, and drills him with the CARRIBEAN COMPACTOR~!!!!!11111 COACH Oh, kick out, Vinny! 1... 2... 3!!! COACH Damn it, damn it, damn it. COLE And can you believe this? Ken Pantera now looking across the ring at an entire five-man team! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 4th elimination: Vinny Valentine eliminated by: Denzel Spencer (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Pantera steps into the ring, and surveys the scene, then moves in slowly on Denzel. Denzel moves in for a tie-up, but gets a foot to the gut instead. Pantera quickly hammers him to the mat with forearms, then drops an elbow, and covers... 1... 2... Kickout! COACH And this is what Pantera's got to do here, go for falls, he can't let up! Take them one-by-one! You can do it, Kenny! Pantera lifts Denzel for a PRESS SLAM~!, then does several reps with Denzel, before dropping him to the mat! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Pantera picks up Denzel, and whips him into the corner, then charges...but Denzel moves out of the way! COLE Nobody home on that charge, though! Denzel tags in Reggie, who picks up Pantera for a big scoop slam! COLE And Reggie Lamont showing off a little power of his own there! Reggie delivers a foot to the gut, then backs into the ropes, and executes a SCISSOR KICK~! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Reggie executes another slam, then climbs to the top rope. COLE And Reggie Lamont now, I don't think I've ever seen him go to the top! Reggie comes down, and gets caught by Pantera in a bearhug! COACH And there's why! Pantera rams Reggie into the corner, then brings him out and executes a belly-to-belly gutwrench! COLE Big suplex from Ken Pantera, just throwing around this 260-pounder like a ragdoll! COACH He's not in this match, Cole. COLE Well, I...forget it. Pantera picks up Reggie, and grabs him in a front facelock, lifting him and executing the APOLLON'S WHEEL~!!!!!11111 COACH There we go! 1... 2... 3!!! COACH All right. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 5th elimination: Reggie Lamont eliminated by: Ken Pantera (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jumbo comes in, and hammers Pantera on the back, then whips him into the ropes, and hits him with a Vader-esque body attack! COLE And Jumbo in there immediately! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Jumbo whips Pantera into a corner, and charges, but Pantera steps out and sticks his elbow out! Pantera then scoops up Jumbo. COLE And look at this strength. COACH Look at him hold the man! This guy's 440 pounds! Pantera executes a FALLAWAY SLAM~! COLE And a fallaway slam! Unbelievable! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Pantera sets up Jumbo for an Irish whip, but Jumbo reverses, and hits him with a BIG BOOT~! Jumbo then makes a tag to Felix! COLE And now it's the former tag team partners going at it! Felix slings into the ring, catching Pantera with a dropkick on the way in! Felix executes right hands and chops, then backs him into the ropes and whips him across, backing into the ropes himself, and catching him with a spinning wheel kick! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Felix runs to the corner, and hops to the second rope, leaping off and hitting Pantera with a forearm! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE And if anyone knows what to do against Ken Pantera, it's his former tag team partner, World Cup champions! Felix hits a high kick on Pantera, staggering him into a corner, then charges, but Pantera moves, and Felix goes shoulder-first into the post! COLE Oh, Felix with that shoulder right into the post! Pantera pulls Felix out by the pants, and locks in the FULL NELSON~!!!!!11111 COLE And now the full nelson! COACH And notice, Pantera facing Felix's corner, making sure no one comes in for the save! Felix fights briefly, but is forced to tap out! COACH Now we're talking! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 6th elimination: "After Hours" Felix Strutter eliminated by: Ken Pantera (submission) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE So Felix Strutter gone, at the hands of his former tag team partner, the only man left for Tryst at Mardi Gras, Ken Pantera! Deuce comes in, and engages in a slugfest with Pantera, eventually winning the exchange, then whipping him into the ropes, and hitting him with a spinning wheel kick! Deuce quickly tags in Jumbo, then whips Pantera into a corner. COLE Double team move coming up here! Jumbo grabs Deuce in a headlock, and executes a BATTERING RAM~! on Pantera! COLE A battering ram from Jumbo and Deuce! Pantera in trouble, he's been in there a long time! Denzel hops into the ring, and leaps into Ken's face, pulling him down onto his knee! COACH And that's the move that eliminated Biff earlier! Jumbo then backs into the ropes, and hits the XL SPLASH~!!!!!11111 COLE And this could be the move that eliminates Pantera! Jumbo covers, and Deuce and Denzel both pile on... 1... 2... 3!!! *DING DING DING* COLE And that'll do it! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 7th elimination: Ken Pantera eliminated by: Jumbo (pinfall) SURVIVORS: Jumbo, Deuce Deuce Bigelow, Denzel Spencer ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen...the survivors of the match...DEUCE DEUCE BIGELOW, DENZEL SPENCER, and JUMMMMMMMBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! COACH I'll tell you what though, give Pantera some credit here! He was faced with Jumbo's entire team, and still managed to take out two of them before falling to the odds! COLE Yes indeed, a gallant effort on the part of Ken Pantera at the end, but the result here is Jumbo survives, along with Deuce and the red-hot Denzel Spencer! Felix and Reggie come back out to celebrate in the ring COLE And the eliminated members of the team back out to celebrate, as Jumbo's Disco Demolition squad victorious at November Reign! OAOASTShop.com just...got...Deadlier. The Deadly Alliance T-shirt. Get it now at OAOASTShop.com

Hello, Hello, Hello I'm waking up at the start of the end of the world, But it's feeling just like every other morning before, Now I wonder what my life is going to mean if it's gone, The cars are moving like a half a mile an hour if that And I started staring at the passengers who're waving goodbye Can you tell me what was ever really special about me all this time? But I believe the world is burning to the ground Oh well I guess we're gonna find out Let's see how far we've come Let's see how far we've come Well I, believe, it all, is coming to an end Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend, Let's see how far we've come Let's see how far we've come I think it turned ten o'clock but I don't really know Then I can't remember caring for an hour or so Started crying and I couldn't stop myself I started running but there's no where to run to I sat down on the street and took a look at myself Said where you going man you know the world is headed for hell Say your goodbyes if you've got someone you can say goodbye to I believe the world is burning to the ground Oh well I guess we're gonna find out Let's see how far we've come Let's see how far we've come Well I, believe, it all, is coming to an end Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend, Let's see how far we've come Let's see how far we've come It's gone gone baby it's all gone There is no one on the corner and there's no one at home It was cool cool, it was just all cool Now it's over for me and it's over for you Well it's gone gone baby it's all gone There is no one on the corner and there's no one at home Well it was cool cool, it was just all cool Now it's over for me and it's over for you But I believe the world is burning to the ground Oh well I guess we're gonna find out Let's see how far we've come Let's see how far we've come Well I, believe, it all, is coming to an end Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend ~A CELEBRATION OF HOW FAR WE'VE COME~ OAOAST HeldDOWN THE 300TH EPISODE JANUARY 29TH 2009 LIVE FROM DODGER STADIUM LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA Let's see how far we've come Let's see how far we've come Let's see how far we've come Let's see how far we've come Let's see how far we've come COLE That's right fans, on January 29, 2009, we will have the THREE HUNDREDTH episode of OAOAST HeldDOWN~! That's right! 300! It has been a wild ride! We have seen some wild stuff! And we hope that you will join us for the 300th episode celebration! But don't forget, there will be another episode of HeldDOWN~! this upcoming Saturday night at 8:00 p.m. Eastern Standard Time/5:00 p.m. Pacific Standard Time. That's a special time for this week only, fans! And just who will walk into OAOAST HeldDOWN~! as the One And Only AngleSault Thread World Heavyweight Champion this Saturday night? Well, we are about to find out! The OAOAST November Reign 2008 logo flashes across the screen. The match-up graphic for Tha Puerto Rican/Leon Rodez OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship Match appears on screen. The old school WWF Survivor Series theme song plays in the background. The crowd cheers loudly. COLE Fans, coming up next is our main event! The one we have been waiting for! This is Leon Rodez’s biggest test to date! Tha Puerto Rican has spent the past four weeks calling Leon a jokester and Mr. Comedian. Can Leon finally win ‘The Big One’? His opportunity is here and now! Leon Rodez challenges Tha Puerto Rican for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship! This is going to be one hell of a match-up! It is our main event for November Reign, and it has been a long and winding road for both men to get to this moment! Here’s a look at our two competitors in our main event! The OAOAST November Reign 2008 logo flashes across the screen. The old school WWF Survivor Series theme song ends. CUE: PR/Leon video package. Cut to a close-up of Tha Puerto Rican. Cut to a close-up of Leon Rodez. Cut to a close-up of Tha Puerto Rican. Cut to a close-up of Leon Rodez. Cut to a close-up of Tha Puerto Rican. Cut to a close-up of Leon Rodez. Cut to a close-up of Tha Puerto Rican. Cut to a close-up of Leon Rodez. Slow classical music plays. The following all takes place in black and white: Cut to Tha Puerto Rican coming to the ring. NARRATOR The P.R. Menace. Cut to Leon Rodez coming to the ring. NARRATOR The New Age Love Machine. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican coming to the ring. NARRATOR The Great One. Cut to Leon Rodez coming to the ring. NARRATOR The Silky Smooth One. Cut to a montage of PRL and Leon Rodez clips. Both men in action, both men performing their finishing moves, both men coming to the ring, both men interacting with fans, both men celebrating wins, and close-up shots of both men. NARRATOR Both men have many nicknames, both men have many moves in their arsenal, and both men are loved by the fans. The main event for November Reign 2008 is less about two fierce rivals who are filled with hate for each other, and more about two charismatic, talented individuals who both want what only one can have. Cut to a montage of PRL clips. NARRATOR Tha Puerto Rican: cool, calm, sophisticated. A man who has a response for everything and a wit as quick as his fists. He has waited 10 years to get to where he is today. A young boy with a dream is now a man living out his destiny. Cut to a montage of Leon Rodez clips. NARRATOR Leon Rodez: funny, smart, athletic. A man who would rather crack a joke than pound your head in. Leon has made a name for himself as perhaps the funniest Superstar in One And Only AngleSault Thread history. He has been in this company for five and a half years, but has yet to garner its top prize. Cut to clips of the interactions between Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez over the past month. NARRATOR These two men have found themselves at a crossroads. Both men seek to prove a point in tonight’s main event. It is a battle for respect, honour, and dignity as much as it is for the World Heavyweight Title. Cut to a montage of Leon Rodez clips throughout his career. NARRATOR For Leon Rodez, it is a chance to prove that he belongs in the main event scene. It has been a long hard road up to this point. First making a living as a porn star, Leon traveled around the globe before arriving in the OAOAST in 2003. Since then, he has been the holder of several titles, competed in several classic matches, and has garnered a huge fan base. For Leon, being in the OAOAST is all about having a good time and making each and every fan in the arena smile. Cut to a montage of PRL clips throughout his career. NARRATOR For Tha Puerto Rican, it is a chance to prove that he is the top athlete in the One And Only AngleSault Thread. It has been a longer, harder, more bumpy road for The People’s Champion that began in San Juan, Puerto Rico. The man formerly known as Puerto Rican Lightning debuted as the leader of The Lightning Crew, and for four years, he led The Lightning Crew as they left their mark in the OAOAST, winning titles and beating down Superstar after Superstar. Cut to Cuban Wall clotheslining Tha Puerto Rican from behind on the November 30, 2007 edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!, and then The Lightning Crew turning on Tha Puerto Rican. NARRATOR Exactly one year ago today, Tha Puerto Rican’s life changed forever when he was banished from the very group that he created and forced to go at it alone. P.R. began his road to redemption, winning the love of the fans in the process, which culminated at AngleMania VII, when he achieved his dream and became World Heavyweight Champion. Cut to P.R. celebrating his World Heavyweight Championship win at AngleMania VII on March 30, 2008. NARRATOR Since then, Tha Puerto Rican has successfully fended off every challenger to his Title. For Tha Puerto Rican, being in the OAOAST is all about proving that he is not only the best athlete to ever come out of Puerto Rico, but the best athlete in the world, PERIOD. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican celebrating his victory in the 5-Man Prism Elimination Match for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship at the Halloween Spectacular on October 31, 2008. Cut to highlights from Tha Puerto Rican/Leon Rodez Ladder Match for the OAOAST 24/7 Championship at OAOAST AngleMania V on April 2, 2006. NARRATOR This will not be the first battle between Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez. At AngleMania V on April 2, 2006 from the Trump Plaza Hotel And Convention Center in Atlantic City, New Jersey, P.R. and Rodez proceeded to have one of the greatest Ladder Matches in professional wrestling history. At the end of that battle, it was Leon who emerged victorious, obtaining the OAOAST 24/7 Championship from the hook as P.R. watched on in agony, being held back by four men, one of who, ironically, would join up with Tha Puerto Rican to form The Badd Boyz less than two years later! Cut to Leon Rodez grabbing the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt to win the Ladder Match at OAOAST AngleMania V. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican brawling with Leon Rodez on the November 13, 2008 edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. NARRATOR Over two years have gone by since that classic Ladder Match. A lot has changed in the lives of both P.R. and Leon. Tonight, both men will fight for the first time since April 2, 2006, and one has to wonder if the two year gap between matches will affect their gameplans. Have they learned anything from their previous encounters with each other? Cut to Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez staring at each other from the November 13, 2008 edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. NARRATOR Even though neither man wants to admit it, there are several similatries between Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican coming to the ring wearing the OAOAST X-Division Championship belt. Cut to Leon Rodez coming to the ring wearing the OAOAST X-Division Championship belt. NARRATOR Both men are former X-Division Champions. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican coming to the ring wearing a HI-YAH World Tag Team Championship belt. Cut to Leon Rodez coming to the ring wearing an OAOAST World Tag Team Championship belt. NARRATOR Both men are former co-holders of tag team championships. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican coming to the ring wearing the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt. Cut to Leon Rodez coming to the ring wearing the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt. NARRATOR And both men are former 24/7 Champions. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican raising the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt into the air with his right hand and “smelling the electricity” as a single spotlight shines down on him ala The Rock while Leon Rodez looks on from the November 6, 2008 edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. NARRATOR But the one thing that they don’t have in common is the one thing that Leon hopes to change tonight: being the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez having a staredown on the November 27, 2008 Thanksgiving edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. NARRATOR This past Thursday on the Thanksgiving edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!, Tha Puerto Rican gave his final thoughts on Leon Rodez. THA PUERTO RICAN So, here we are. Three days away from the biggest match of your life, and has anything I’ve said over the last three weeks sunk in yet? No, I don’t think so. Well, Leon, let me tell you one more time. Before we head into the Arrowhead Pond in Anaheim, California this Sunday night, I just want to tell you one final time: you AREN’T in my league! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” THA PUERTO RICAN Leon Rodez, the closer we get to the match, the more obvious it becomes. You just can’t cut the mustard. Leon, in my 243 days as OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion, I have been choked out by a 6’7” 285 pound monster, been pushed to the limit by a 6’6” 215 pound ankle breaking machine, been made a fool of by an OAOAST Original, and have been chased by four of the best wrestlers in the world today! I have fought the best. I have fought the biggest. I have fought the smartest. I have fought the most dangerous. I have fought the most charismatic. I have fought the most cunning. And I HAVE BEATEN THEM ALL! And Leon, you are NONE OF THE ABOVE! “OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” THA PUERTO RICAN You are a jokester, Leon. You are a makeup-less clown! You’re just a comedian who is in WAY over his head! If the OAOAST was based on comedic talent, and making the fans laugh, then you would have been World Heavyweight Champion many times over. But this is not The Daily Show. This is not The Colbert Report. This is not Late Night With Conan O’Brien. This is the OAOAST. And in the OAOAST, talent in the RING comes first! And in that case, you…can’t…match…up…to…me! Leon just stares at Tha Puerto Rican. THA PUERTO RICAN In a perfect world, you would just accept this and move on. But this isn’t a perfect world, so you can’t accept this fact of life. So, Tha Puerto Rican will just have to BEAT YOU UNTIL YOU ACCEPT IT! You’re not gonna win on Sunday, Leon! I'm not winning this for The Deadly Alliance. I'm not winning this for Cucaracha Internacional. I'm not winning this for The Enterprise. I'm not winning this for The In Crowd. I'm winning this for ME! THIS is PERSONAL! THIS is all about ME! Tha Puerto Rican is NOT in danger! Tha Puerto Rican is NOT in jeopardy! Tha Puerto Rican is NOT in danger of losing the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship! Leon Rodez, there is a reason, a very very GOOD reason why people, they talk and they talk and they talk about why you can’t win ‘The Big One’. And of all of the reasons, Leon Rodez, Tha Puerto Rican tells you the truth: the reason you can’t win ‘The Big One’ is simply because…you are not that good! “OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” THA PUERTO RICAN You’re funny, I’ll give you that much. But as a wrestler? UH-UH! You just don’t have what it takes! You’re not in my league! Tha Puerto Rican OWNS your roody poo candy ass! And this Sunday, at November Reign, Tha Puerto Rican will show the world that this is the truth, Ruth! And there is not a damn thing you can do about it! You little one trick pony! You can’t win! You can’t pin me! You can’t make me submit! You can’t BEAT ME! You are going do-- LEON RODEZ SHUT…UP! “YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Tha Puerto Rican is shocked. Leon is more than a little annoyed with Tha Puerto Rican right now. THA PUERTO RICAN What the hell? Don’t you ever, AND THA PUERTO RICAN MEANS EVER, interrupt Tha Puerto Rican ever aga-- LEON RODEZ Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT…THE…HELL…UP! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” THA PUERTO RICAN Oh, lookie here. FINALLY, Leon shows some anger! Isn’t that sweet!? Well, listen here-- LEON No! YOU listen! Just shut up for a second and LISTEN for once in your sad pathetic life! All month long you have been talking and talking and talking! Do you even know what you’re saying anymore!? I’m not gonna lie, I’ve had it up to here with you! You have gotten on my last nerve! You keep dogging me, insulting me, belittling me, and frankly, I can’t take anymore of this! You’re annoying me now! You’ve gotten under my skin! And unlike you, I don’t have a thousand and one catchphrases to pick and choose from to respond with. I respond through different more creative ways, usually. But this situation is special. I’m going to respond the best way I can: by beating YOU and taking YOUR OAOAST World Heavyweight Title in the process! The crowd cheers. LEON You’re talking because you’re scared. And you’re scared because you know what’s coming up. And that is the end. The end of the PRL Era. The end of your World Heavyweight Title reign. And I know that that’s gotta suck! I mean, you spent 10 years chasing after this, and it’s all over in just 8 months! 8 months is NOTHING compared to 10 years of dreaming! But that’s reality, PRL! You’re going to be on the top of the OAOAST for not even a year! On Sunday night, a new era will begin in the One And Only AngleSault Thread! And THAT is the truth, Ruth! THA PUERTO RICAN You talk big, but you’re a scared little man! I can sense it! LEON All you sense is that the end of your World Title reign is near! So you’re trying to save your ass now! THA PUERTO RICAN I’m doing no such thing! LEON Face reality, PR! The sooner you accept it, the better you will be in the long run! You think I’m not that good? Not that good, huh? Well, I’ll promise you this, P.R., after this Sunday night, you will never-- THA PUERTO RICAN OH BITE ME, LEON! YOU GIANT PIECE OF MONKEY CRA-- Leon puts his right hand in front of Tha Puerto Rican’s face! Leon is getting more and more pissed off as the seconds go by! COLE I have never seen Leon Rodez quite like this! Tha Puerto Rican is stunned by this. But he quickly goes back to being all snotty. THA PUERTO RICAN So it’s like this, huh? Is this how you wanna play? Leon sticks his right hand out in front of Tha Puerto Rican’s face again! “YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Tha Puerto Rican removes his sunglasses and flicks them aside. He steps to the left of Leon’s hand. However, Leon simply steps to his right, so that his hand is once again in front of Tha Puerto Rican’s face. “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” Leon turns his hand around. He then does the one hand motion Tha Puerto Rican didn’t expect. LEON Just shut up…and…JUST…BRING IT! And Leon does indeed do the “Just Bring It!” hand gesture! Tha Puerto Rican shoves Leon! Leon shoves Tha Puerto Rican back! Tha Puerto Rican shoves Leon again! Leon shoves Tha Puerto Rican once again! COLE It’s breaking loose! It’s gonna break down again! Leon and Tha Puerto Rican stand nose-to-nose, face-to-face, yelling at each other! The crowd is going nuts! That’s more than enough for security, referees and OAOAST Road Agents to run into the ring to separate the two men. The crowd boos loudly! COLE And here comes security, road agents, officials to separate these two! Josie Baker must have sent them out to make sure that the main event of November Reign goes off as planned, because these two are about ready to tear each other apart! Referees, security and OAOAST Road Agents are able to separate Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez, but that doesn’t stop the two men from running their mouths, yelling at the top of their lungs. PRL holds up the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt and points to it, telling Leon in no uncertain terms that he doesn’t have a chance in Hell of winning this Sunday night. “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” Cut to Tha Puerto Rican giving Leon Rodez the P.R. Nightmare on the November 27, 2008 Thanksgiving edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. NARRATOR And so we have arrived. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez brawling on The Love Shack on the November 13, 2008 edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. NARRATOR A match that some say is 2 years in the making. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican coming to the ring. NARRATOR For Tha Puerto Rican, it is a chance to prove that he is the most dominant Superstar in the One And Only AngleSault Thread today and it is a chance to go down in history as one of the greatest One And Only AngleSault Thread World Heavyweight Champions of all-time. Cut to Leon Rodez coming to the ring. NARRATOR For Leon Rodez, it is a chance to prove that he is a serious threat in the One And Only AngleSault Thread. It is his chance to finally win ‘The Big One’. A chance to show his doubters that he is more than just a comedic wrestler and that he has what it takes to compete in the big time main events. Cut to clips of Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez. NARRATOR Two masters of the mic. Two warriors of the squared circle. Two charismatic Superstars who will one day be enshrined in the OAOAST Hall Of Fame! Two one-of-a-kind Superstars will duke it out for the richest prize in our industry! For the chance to be called World Heavyweight Champion! Cut to clips of Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez celebrating victories. NARRATOR At the end of the night, only one man will be able to raise the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt. Cut to clips of Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez after losing matches. NARRATOR At the end of the night, only one man will be on the mat, in pain, suffering defeat. Cut to one more montage of PRL clips. NARRATOR For Tha Puerto Rican, it is about cementing his place in One And Only AngleSault Thread history. Cut to one more montage of Leon Rodez clips. NARRATOR For Leon Rodez, it is about finally having his moment in the sun. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez staring at each other from the November 27, 2008 Thanksgiving edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. NARRATOR Just who will emerge victorious? Buckle up your seatbelts. We are about to find out! We freeze frame on Tha Puerto Rican and Leon Rodez staring at each other from the November 27, 2008 Thanksgiving edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. The slow classical music ends. FADE OUT The OAOAST November Reign 2008 logo flashes across the screen. ENOUGH TALK! LET’S START FIGHTING!!!

COACH Rules are made to be followed, Mikey, The Blonds broke ‘em and now they’re outta here. Every bit as angry as the audience, the Pissed Off Prep comes in a smoldering cauldron of rage and fire. The first victim to feel his wrath is Logan, cut down by a lariat. Right as Mann hits the canavs, Malibu darts towards Moneymaker. Eager to avoid the enraged megastar, Moneymaker leaps off the ring apron. The obnoxious finger wagging of his rival distracts Zack from Mann, and he’s caught from behind with a clubbing forearm. Two more shots to the back follow before Mann flings Zack into the corner. The ring posts nearly knock the breath out The Franchise as he collides backfirst with them. But he still has the wits about him to scatter out the way when Mann comes charging after him. Clutching his hurt stomach, the rock n wrestling superstar staggers backwards as Malibu leaps onto the second rope. The fans explode with cheers when he crashes through Mann with a cross body block! Buzzlefoxer counts the pinfall. ONE! TWO! Mister Dick breaks it up with a boot to the head! The disdain the fans felt over such a tactic dissipates the moment Bo runs the length of the apron and nearly takes MD’s head off with a clothesline! While his partner drags himself out the ring, Logan attempts to chuck Zack into the ropes. But the POP reverses the hold and sends Mann heading to the cables. Unable to think of a counter attack, the three time tag champ is upended with a back body drop! “MALIBU! MALIBU! MALIBU!” Zack is feelin' DAT BABYFACE FIYAH~! and beats his chest to an approving audience. Yet, this flood of testosterone costs him dearly; Christian Wright surprises him with a bulldog! Without waiting for the alzheimer’s ridden referee to realize this is illegal, Logan rolls out the ring to make Wright the legal man. CW quickly takes advantage of his trickery by planting a pair of elbows into the back of Zack’s head. With Malibu groggy from the shots, CW guides him to his feet and assails him with a bit of verbose trashtalk. Zack may not be able to understand what the hell CW says, but it doesn’t make him any less angry, and he recalls his strength to batter The Natural with wild right hands. Wright looks on the verge of tipping over into an early KO, but he’s kept aloft by the POP whipping him into the corner. Just seconds after hitting the post, Wright must deal with the irking sight of Malibu charging him. Out of sheer desperation, he throws up his loafers and that’s enough to stop Zack’s attack and cause him to stagger backwards. As Malibu attends to his blurred vision and sore face, CW scoots onto the top rope. He then flies towards Malibu and sends him tumbling to the canvas with a dropkick. While the Steamers applaud his showing, he hooks Zack’s leg for a fall… ONE! TWO! The massive forearm of Bohemoth ends the pinfall, and has Christian demanding Buzzlefoxer control his former bodyguard. Wright soon shifts his attention away from old man Clam and back to Zack, roughly shoving the Franchise into the neutrual corner. He reddens his chest with several European uppercuts that leave Malibu wincing in agony and covering his tormented chest. Wright isn’t much for mercy and furthers his assault with an Irish whip towards an opposite corner. He follows the Prep in, expecting to hit a body splash. But Zack evades his charge and he slams full force into the posts! Staggering backwards Wright falls into the Angle Slam! “YEAAAAAAA!” the Anaheim audience erupts, as Zack falls on top CW for a pinfall. He waits and waits for the referee to count, thinking Clem is merely undergoing another narcolepsy spell. In reality, Abdullah has distracted him with verses from his holy book. Without a second of hesitation, Zack reaches the speaker for the prophets and headbutts him off the apron! The audience’s delighted reaction is the complete opposite of the mortified Cleveland Steamers. COACH He just hit Allah’s right hand sand nigga! Hope you enjoy your trip to hell, Preppy! MACKENZIE I don’t think he will. Hell doesn’t have an Applebees for him to take his bastard child to that looks like the Hispanic guy next door. Zack turns back to Wright with the thought that The Natural is still down from the Angleslam. Erroneous thinking on the POP’s part as CW runs through him with a spear! A pinfall follows… ONE! TWO! Zack gets his shoulder off the canavs. Rolling off Malibu, Wright keeps his hands within his sandy blonde hair in order to bring him off the mat. Now upright, Malibu regains his spirit and tags CW with a left-right combo that leads right into a right cross! Feeling as though every tooth in his mouth has been loosened, The Natural wobbles aimlessly before suffering a mercy killing as Zack brings him to the mat with a double leg takedown. He drags The Natural to his corner where he applies the tag to Krista! Huge cheers rush from the mouths of the fans for their fellow Californian, but Krista isn’t quite ready to enter as she’s reapplying her lip gloss. “Hurry up, ya dike!” Mister Dick shouts from across the ring. ‘Hey, racist, you no who else is? Ben Stiller, Adam Sandler, hall of famer Rod Carew-“ “He said dike not kike.” Zack chimes in. “Oh, honey, I’m sorry.” Krista apologizes and to make up for her gaffe decides to give CW a free make over. Ignoring his protest, she crazily scribbles her lip gloss across his face. But he continues to complain, and not one for ungratefulness, she shoves him to the ground and throws her gloss at his head. Just CW’s luck, it hits him in the eye. Unsympathetic to his associate’s misery, Moneymaker gruffly orders him to fight. With no room for debate, CW is quick to his feet, but just as he stands Krista’s ten thousand dollar legs spin him around in a twisting head scissors. On the verge of vomiting, CW stumbles upright but is caught by a five thousand dollar knee strike! The attack knocks him off balance, but he recovers with quickly enough to charge at the walk of famer. But, Krissy meets his arrival by tightening her arms around his neck. He exhausts every effort to break free of her grip, but all her work is futile and she drops him with a Blonds Never Pay A Cover (side effect)! COLE Wright paying the ultimate price for being in the same ring as Krista at the same time. Hasn’t he learned by now? He was Rico before Rico was Rico. Wright tries to get off the mat under his own power, but this is made maddingly impossible when a Fendi platform heel slams into his noggin. The other half of the 675$ pumps lands its strike, and then the whole pair mangles his face with a dropkick. The heels take her to the ropes, but her hands bring her back in a graceful cartwheel that ends with a knee driven into CW’s skull. A furious headache immediately consumes Wright, and urges him to get to his corner. Thus he rolls off the canvas, but as he does so Krista is bouncing off the ropes. When she reaches her rival, her arms hook beneath his and haul his lip glossed face down against her knee. Quickly, she scurries behind him and further mutilates his facial features with a one handed face crusher! Wright cries out in miserey. “Oh, honey, you’re gonna raise your voice to me right now? In front of our kid?” “I am not increasing the decibel levels of my tonality! By the gods, I’m injured!” “For the sake of the baby, honey, I think we need some space.” Space is taken as Krista takes in the Meterosexual Monster! CW attempts to make a speedy retreat to his corner, but his escape is halted by BO’s fingers clamping down on his curly hair. The giant throws him into the corner, and ignoring Wright’s cries for mercy, ravages him with a series of overhand chops. Logan realizes that Bo might very well shred Wright straight to his bone, and enters the ring to rescue his fellow Steamer. Unfortunately for him, Bo spots his arrival and nearly saws him in half with a powerful lariat! The audience cheers and Bo roars with adrenaline, neither one noticing a recovered CW standing on the second rope. Thus its to both their surprise when he vacates his perch to pelt Bo with a diving forearm. Satisfied with that one offensive strike, CW tags in The Billion Dollar Heir. Together they lift a groggy Bohemoth off the mats and throw him at the ropes. He returns with both arms raised for double clothesline, but that only makes it easier for The Enterprise reps to throw him over with a double hip toss! As Wright departs the ring, his boss hands Bo A Fistful of Dollars and then goes for a fall. ONE! TWO! Bo powers his way out the pinfall, leading Moneymaker to stomp around the canvas in a lunatic tantrum. Putting his rage to a “healthy” use, he returns to the big man to collar him and blast his face with punches. After drawing a sprinkle of blood from Bo’s forehead, Moneymaker ends his hold in order to stand up and drive his red boots into the top of his rival’s head. Yet even as Moneymaker throws all his strength and anger into his stomps, Bo still succeeds in finding his way up. Unwilling to give the monster a chance to mount a counter attack, Moneymaker irish whips Bo away. As he returns, the Messiah hops into the air for a leapfrog, but the South Carolinian is a hair ahead of him and smashes him into the canvas with a spine buster! COLE Is there anyone in the OAOAST with the might and power of Big Bohemoth? MACKENZIE We’ll see how impressive you find that might and power when its holding you down and RAPING you. While Bo takes a moment to shake out the cobwebs Moneymaker’s kicks struck him with, The Steamers’ captain rolls to his corner where he makes a tag with Logan Mann. Showing no fear of the monster, Mann charges into the ring. But his bravery is rewarded with a flap jack that brings him down throat first across the top rope! Logan stumbles away from the cables, and heads towards the snarling beast. As he has little intentions of enduring further beatings from Bo, Mann resorts to cheap tactics and rakes his eyes. Blinded, Bohemoth can’t stop Logan from hooking his gigantic arms behind his back. Thankfully he recovers his sight just in time to boot a charging Wright in the face! As the fans pop for his counter, the big man breaks free of Logan’s hold and whirls is around to hammer him with a punch. But Mann moves quickly, and stabs him in the gut with a swift boot. His hands go around his neck in a front facelock and the dreaded finger twirl signals the percussion! “BOOOOOO!” But Bo fights off the finisher by shoving Mann to the ropes! Little does he know, that he just gave Mister Dick the chance to make a blind tag. The MACHO Macho Mann darts at Bo, sliding beneath the lumbering brute’s legs. Distracted by Mann’s frantic movement, Bo can’t prevent the Human Hard On from pasting him in between the eyes with a polish hammer! The attack doesn’t succeed in flooring Bohemoth, instead knocking him straight towards Mann who captures him in another setup for a Percussion DDT! Once again Logan is unsuccessful, as Bo lifts him up and runs clear across the ring to dump the rockstar over the ropes! Not even waiting to see where poor Mann landed, the Meterosexual Monster now turns on Mister Dick. Though rumbling back with full speed, Bo is casually ensared by the waiting arms of The Cocky Prick. With almost inhuman strength, Mister Dick hoists the two hundred seventy five pounder onto his shoulders, and let’s the world marvel at his awesome power. Finally he throws Bo off his shoulder and on the big man’s descent he drives his knees straight into his gut! The fans are distraught, and Zack looks panicked on the ring apron, both watching Bo tumble lifeless onto the canvas. COLE The Cock Block! Oh no! MACKENZIE If only someone had cock blocked Bohemoth before he raped me. Smiling broadly, Mister Dick leans back across Bo’s body for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! THREE! A cascade of angered boos rushes down from the stands as Mister Dick only enflames the fiery situation by using his boots to remove Bo from the ring. Standing in rapture is his fellow Cleveland Steamers, scarcely able to stop themselves from pouring into the ring and celebrating their fantastic odds. BUFFER Boheomth has been eliminated! MACKENZIE Can we finally kill the myth that this guy is worth anything? He’s like a guy at a gym telling everyone to clear way so everyone can see his monster dunk, then proceeds to jump only 1inch in the air and fall on his ankle wrong and have 2 guys carry him off the court crying. And then he dies on the ambulance ride over. Though repeated taunts and threats of violence from the Steamers make it seem as though Zack and Krista are pilots about the Hindenburg, the two captains affix their bravest and most resilient looks on their face. The audience still feels the sting of Bohemoth’s elimination, but now throws their full support behind their resolute heroes. COACH Cleveland Steamers came through and shitted on they lives, cuz! Laid feces and excrement on they heart and soul! Straight pulled down the chinos and dropped a deuce on a whole gang of niggas. That’s whats up! Things don’t get off to a rollicking start for the dream team, as Mister Dick grabs onto Krista’s hair and throws her into the ring. Immediately she tries to stand up, but she’s halted by a bombardment of punches from Dickzilla. Abruptly, MD ceases his strikes but this is only to make a savage attempt to choke the life out her. Ignoring the warnings from Buzzlefoxer and the cries of the audience, MD continues to tighten his hold around her neck. Only when Buzzlefoxer threatens a DQ does Mister Dick finally relent. None too pleased about having to stop choking Krista, he expresses his displeasure by spitting on her! COACH I’ma tell you what the Dream Team feels like, right hurr. Its like you simpin on a ho on facebook , then you send a message and she doesn't reply. So you write on her wall where you know she has to see it....and she still doesn't reply...then you see her friends have left messages. But it looks like she hasn't replied to them either...so you take a sigh of relief...only to log back on and see has uploaded new photos...but she still hasn't replied to you...so you send a note to her inbox....and she still hasn't replied...and then you see her at Lennox mall with another guy! FUCK YOU ELLEN HOPKINS! Meanwhile, Mister Dick whips Krista to the ropes. Unexpectedly, she snaps his neck back like a tether with a ferocious diving forearm! Kipping back up at the exact same moment her angered foe gets to his feet, Krista lures him into her. He takes her bait and nearly has his testicles ruptured with an inverted atomic drop! As the horrific pain freezes him in place, he can do nothing to stop her from leaping upwards , collaring her hands around his neck and spiking it off the canvas! The audience applauds with great enthusiasm, as Krista strikes a covergirl pose for the throng of photojournalists. Eager to take advantage of her vanity, Wright runs into the ring. But, The Franchise protects his teammate from harm by wiping out CW with a springboard crossbody block! “YEAAAAA!” Unaware of what just happened with Zack and CW, Krista wonders why both men are laid out, but merely chalks it up to the usual being floored by her beauty, and decides to head to the ropes. Unfortunately, Mann lowers the third cable and the Hollywood starlet is upended out the ring! On sheer luck alone, she’s able to land on her feet, but its an off balance landing and she stumbles into the barricade. Sensing a sliver of vulnerability, Moneymaker targets her with an axe handle smash. But her perceived weakness disappears, and after she glides out the way he slams into the steel guardrail. Draped over the railing, he’s deluged with insults from a decidedly hostile audience. Unlike most performers who would take this moment to try and put their foe through the nearby announce table, Krista is satisfied to gather up whatever refreshments she can from the fans and shove them into Moneymaker’s tights. Once his red tights are filled to capacity with skittles, popcorn, snickers, and hotdogs, she retrieves a chair from the timekeeper area. Krista figures she better not risk a DQ and yells, “Hey Clem, California law says if you don’t close your eyes once per match you have to do oral on Judd Nelson!” “The guy from the Breakfast Club?” “The one and only.” Unable to pass up such good legal advice, Clem shuts his lids and that’s what allows Krista make the ickiest culinary concoction by slamming her steel chair into Moneymaker’s BUTT! Distressed cries of pain and rage fall out his mouth, but are quickly washed away by the uproarious laughter of the audience. While, Moneymaker has to deal with the gooey junk in the trunk, Krista sets up her steel chair inches away from him. Backing towards the other end of the floor gives her the running start she needs to use her tool as a launching pad that sends her scorching to Moneymaker with a double stomp. She comes down across his head with the force of an atom bomb, and with even more deadly precision as she imprints his skull into the concrete floor of the stands. KRISTA & THE FANS Through with celebrating with her fellow Californians, Miss Money In The Bank darts back into the ring. There a Stiff Kick from Mister Dick welcomes her! But she rolls beneath the signature strike, and comes up in front of her corner to make the tag with the Pissed Off Prep! The moment Zack steps into the ring, the newest Deadly Alliance member tries to steamroll him with a polish hammer. But Malibu greets his charge with a knife edge chop, and then hammers away with forearms. His furious attacks collide with MD’s noggin several times before he sends the Human Hard On charging towards the ropes. A blind tag is made by Christian Wright, but that’s of little use to Dick as Zack drills him with a running elbow smash. Zack takes a moment to admire his handiwork. This turns out to be costly thanks to CW shocking him with a side russian leg sweep. He hastily rolls The Franchise to his feet, and shifts position to hook him into a front facelock. A moment later, Malibu is brought into the sky in the makings of a vertical suplex. But, The Franchise refuses to be brought down by Wright and battles out the hold with several knees to the noggin. Besieged by a crippling headache, The Natural hasn’t any other choice but to relinquish his grip on his rival. Back down on his feet, Zack strikes fast and brings the snooty star down to the canvas with a drop toehold! “MALIBU! MALIBU! MALIBU!” While Christian grouses about a possibly broken nose, Malibu rolls across his back and wraps his arms around his head, applying a front facelock and rising to his feet. On the upright, Zack sends a pair of knees into Wright’s sternum and feels his opponent weaken within his grip. With that in mind he attempts to lift Wright up for an impaler DDT. But CW isn’t as weak as Malibu thought and promptly breaks the hold. That’s but a small victory for The Natural as an enraged Franchise begins peeling apart his chest with knife edge chops! But, before the blows can truly leave their searing impact on Wright, he’s granted a reprieve when Mann reaches into the ring and hauls his opponent to the outside. Caught unawares by such foul play, Zack hasn’t the mind to defend himself against the wicked left hands Logan shoots into his face. With the referee distracted by CW’s explaining the theory of evolution, Malibu is left to the merciless assault of the Steamers. After a spinning left hand from Logan leaves him floored, Mister Dick latches onto Zack’s legs. The fans grow heated, hollering numerous threats against Mister Dick should he be so cruel as to harm the company’s poster boy. MD only smiles amidst their complaints and slingshots Malibu against the steel posts! Zack’s head bounces of the harsh metal, creating a clanging sound that’s every bit as chilling as the pained grunts he lets out as he falls back to the floor. On the ring apron, Moneymaker might enjoy such a sight if he weren’t busy trying to clean peanut buttercups out his tights. Logan returns to the ring, and makes a tag with Christian Wright. As Zack is all but removed from the contest, Mann takes it upon himself to taunt Krista over her imminent demise. “Gee, Logan, I’m sure you said something about demise, but all I heard was ‘Damn, I wish my girlfriend didn’t look like a crack addled Kathy Griffin, coming fresh off a gangbang on the set of Mad Max.” Although bloodied, wounded and possibly concussed, Zack won’t allow his injuries to spell his doom and attempts to climb into the ring. But thanks to those maladies his ascent is painfully slow, and its look as though he may fall back to the canvas at any second. He’s given a “helping hand” from Mann, who reaches through the ropes and drags him up onto the ring apron. Once he’s there, the Vegas native tightens him into a front facelock and brings him into the ring with a vertical suplex. He then floats over into a pin… ONE! TWO! Krista breaks up the pin, and earns a grand ovation from her home state crowd. Zack, however, is far from out the woods; Logan begins peppering him with those dangerous left hands. COACH Zack getting tooled on by Logan Mann. Let’s talk about it! Picture a dignified, handsome, Marvin Gaye type brother like Logan being beaten on by a pea-brained nutjob whiteboy like Zack? He an understimulated ass smurfed out lil son-son! LOGAN Able to get his senses back during Logan’s rocking out, Malibu turns onto his knees and uses them to get to an all too unsteady vertical base. Mann isn’t pleased to see Zack back on his feet and punishes him for his insurgence with more left hands. But Malibu shows the same dynamist that made him a three time world champ, and begins fighting back at the rock n wrestling legend. “MALIBU! MALIBU! MALIBU!” the fans and Krista chant. Their support is rewarded by The Franchise as he slams chop after chop against Mann’s pecs. But his offense comes to a sudden halt when Logan fires a knee into his stomach. Crippled by agony, Zack is easily tangled inside a front facelock for a percussion DDT! COLE Oh no! “The end draws near!” Abdullah shouts. But the speaker for the prophets the declaration comes to soon; Zack manages to shove Logan back towards the Dream Team’s corner. Krista strikes him with a slap across the face that stumbles him directly towards a School’s Out! But, Logan snaps to life and makes a sharp U-Turn! Unfortunately, he can’t avoid the springboard dropkick Krista sends at his face! Agonized by the sharp heels driven into his face, he haphazardly falls over before Zack catches him and spins him around with an Angle Slam! On his descent Krista laces her arm around his neck to strike him with an inverted DDT Anaheim nearly cheers itself hoarse in reaction to the double team! COLE He got it! He got the Angleslam! Malibu reaches back and grabs onto Logan’s leg in a cover. ONE! TWO! THREE! BUFFER Logan Mann has been eliminated The Steamers can hardly believe what’s transpired before their eyes, the four on two advantage they had has dwindled to a shaky 3 on 2 matchup. None of the 3 warriors can find the words to describe the wretchedness Logan’s loss has left with their team. The Natural is the first into the ring for his team, and puts Malibu back on the defensive with an elbow drop. Wright then stands up, and brings his foe with him. Malibu begins pelting him with light body blows, but that surge is easily cut short by CW with a knee to the head. With Malibu now subdued, Wright ensnares both of his arms into a butterfly lock and tangles his leg behind Malibu’s. Trapped inside a deadly submission hold, Zack grunts in frustration, as Moneymaker demands he submit. But, Zack strives with incredible vigor to bust free of CW’s submission, but with his every limb under lock and key making it to the ropes is near impossible. Thus he’s forced to suffer a slow death at CW’s hands. COLE Wright and Zack have been at odds many times before, first during the Upstarts feud and now during the In Crowd’s war with The Enterprise. And it looks like CW might win the battle tonight. “Strong men wax weak when stronger men prove unbeatable, eh Zachary?” Wright hollers and gets boos from the audience. Sadly, his haughty demeanor is wrecked by the wonderful image of Miss Money In The Bank performing a “boobie shimmy”. Operating in unified seduction, her torso and shoulders swing side to side, letting her bouncing breasts wash a tidal wave of pleasure over the audience, and Christian. Pleasure soon becomes pain, however, as Zack takes advantage of his distractedness and hip tosses him over! Instantly, CW leaps back upwards to try and reclaim his hold on Zack. But, Malibu dives around him and applies the tag to Miss California! There’s a thundering song of cheers from Krista’s home audience as she enters the ring. And these roaring fans scream even louder when she knocks CW over with a leg lariat. With a hand on his aching face, he stumbles upright and gets thrown into the ropes with an Irish whip! On the rebound, Krista catches him in the stomach with a spinning back kick. She then nails her hobbling foe with a beautiful dropsault and lands perfectly on her high heels. “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” the fans chant as the California idol bows towards her loving fans. Moneymaker cuts short her celebration by brandishing her with right hands. As the fans boo his intrusion, his fists bulldoze her towards a neutral corner. He weakens her with a pair of elbows to the throat before whipping her to the opposite corner. She hits the ring posts with such awesome force that she wobbles backwards and falls right into his arms. Her opponent lifts her up for a back suplex, but the sex kitten slithers down his back. He hasn’t a moment to curse her counter before her tanned legs are slamming into him with a spinning wheel kick. The fans delight in watching him go shoulder first into the steel post, and are even more pleased when he clumsily tumbles to the outside mats. COLE Is it just me or do the rules only seem to apply half the time when Clem referees? MACKENZIE That’s because he only remembers the rules half the time. Lending credence to Cole’s theory, Mister Dick enters the ring to attempt to decapitate Krista with a Stiff Kick! Though she ducks his signature strike, he still hits paydirt by managing to connect with an unmindful Malibu! Boos fill the arena as the OAOAST poster boy is abruptly dumped to ringside. Adding insult to injury, the former Aggie stands at the edge of the ropes and pretends to masturbate over Zack’s fallen corpse. “BOOOOOOO!” “We live in a terrible, terrible culture. Ya don’t like your spouse, divorce em and take half their assets. Ya don’t like someone you’ve only had 30 seconds of interaction with, kick them in the face and masturbate on them.” Miss Money In The Bank mulls over the odd scene. With philosophizing out the way, Krista gets some revenge for Zack by striking MD with a dropkick. Propelled through the ropes, he’s only able to save himself from Zack’s fate with a tenuous grip on the apron. As he brings himself up, Krista runs to the ropes in order to springboard at him with a dropkick. But Moneymaker brings a violent end to these plans through grabbing onto her ankles and throwing her back to the canvas! The audience admonishes him for his cruelty, but he only turns to them with an innocent shrug. COLE For someone who wrestles once every four months, Moneymaker sure is a crafty SOB. MACKENZIE He went to Yale, for Pete’s sake, he could probably figure out how to win the tag team titles with a blind tit mouse as a partner. The Billion Dollar rushes back into the ring with an elbow aimed at his fallen foe’s head. She whimpers in distress, but knowing no help is coming, manages to get herself upright. The Messiah batters her with closed fists, lighting her up with an expert combination of rights and left. But, Krista stuns both he and the fans by whirling around and catching him into a rear waistlock. Despite her incredible fitness model strength she can’t keep Moneymaker under control for a German Suplex, and he wheels out the hold to throw her over with a belly to belly suplex! Leaping to his feet, he mocks Anglesault by dancing in circles and whooooing into the Honda Center sky. “YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!” Through a hold on her slinky top, Moneymaker lifts Krista off the canvas. He leaves her dizzied with a trio of elbows to the back of the head, before taking off to the ropes. Returning with a lariat, he finds she’s not as bad off as he remembered; the blond beauty catches onto his arm, and uses it to hold him in place as she tears into his stomach with knees. But, suddenly Moneymaker tucks his arm between his legs and swings her over with an Angle Slam! To gasps of immense horror and dread Krista is thrown down onto the ground by the former GM’s finisher. COLE Oh my! We could be looking at 3 on 1 odds for Zack right here. That is not good. Moneymaker hooks Krista’s leg for what he believes will be her final three seconds in this match. ONE! TWO! THRENOZACKBREAKSITUP! YEAAAAAAAA!” Past the wild cheers is the gravely voice of Theodore Moneymaker, lambasting the referee for not doing more to prevent Zack’s intrusion. “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA” the fans bleat as their fellow Golden Stater slowly tries to stagger off the mat. She can’t draw on their support, however, as Moneymaker keeps her weak with carefully measured body blows. He then clasps onto her arm and throws her at the ropes. The cables spit her back right into a diving lariat from the Yale alum. Moving with great haste, he dives on her for another fall… ONE! TWO! Krista’s left shoulder comes off the canvas, stunning Moneymaker into disbelieving silence. Without so much as a vexed glance towards Clem, Moneymaker grabs Krista by the arm and guides her to his corner. Upon reaching his destination, he applies the tag with The Human Hard On. Entering the ring, MD measures her for the perfect punch, and then throws her against the mat with a lethal uppercut. As his eyes devour Krista’s prone body, he licks his lips over the harm he can cause her. Dropping down to his knees, he intends to turn fantasy into reality and suffocates her with an illegal choke. “Come on,bitch! Say my name! Say my name!” he shouts, totally shunning the official’s warnings. Finally he relinquishes his harsh choke on Krista, leaving her hacking and wheezing on the mat. She hasn’t much time to recoup her breath before the Cocky Prick brings her upright and digs his fingers into her bright blue eyes. Short of breath and nearly blinded, she’s easily whipped into the cables. But as she comes back, she experiences a burst of strength and leaps into her foe to bring him down across her knees with a KIDology (Codebreaker)! COLE Mister Dick just got inducted into the church of KIDology! A mammoth shout of joy rises from the fans, and Zack pumps his fist in early celebration while Mister Dick rolls over onto the canvas. Krista tries to fulfill their high expectations and pins her hated adversary. ONE TWO! Mister Dick kicks out and an entire arena is left shocked and deflated. While Krista is left to try and piece together how she failed to finish off MD, he decides not to tempt fate any further and crawls away to tag CW. The Natural rushes into the ring and accosts Krista with European uppercuts across the throat. Feeling her weakened by his favorite strikes, the DC native tries to whip her into the corner. But she catches him by surprise and reverses the hold. But he recovers from his shock soon enough to leap onto the ropes to avoid a grizzly collision with the posts. Without wasting a single moment Wrights comes flying off with a forearm! But Krista counters his attack by stabbing her boot into his midsection. He’s hobbled over by the attack, and effortlessly trapped into side headlock. From there the popular starlet swings around and gives CW a taste of Life In The Fab Lane (twist of fate)! “YEAAAAAA!” screams her legion of Golden Staters, coming to life as Krista lays her arm across MD for a vital fall… ONE! TWO! Somehow, CW kicksout. But just getting his shoulder off the canvas, seems to have drained Wright of precious energy and exhaustion glues him to the mat. But, Krista can’t capitalize on his weakness, her aching bones made weary by this hellish contest. Nor she can she recover quite as well as CW due to Moneymaker returning to the contest to terrorize her with stomps. COLE Now this is ridiculous! Come on, Clem! CLEM Hey! I don’t go to a glory hole and tell you how to suck dick, so you don’t tell me how to do my job! COLE & COACH & MACKIE :o Meanwhile in the ring Moneymaker heads to the ropes, intending on hitting Miss Money In The Bank with a billion dollar kneelift. But he can’t even bounce off the cables before Zack lowers them, causing him to take a cataclysmic tumble to ringside. While the audience cheers Moneymaker’s downfall, their heroine is put down by a bulldog! Quickly, Wright scrambles to the top rope, and forgoing all grandiose prelude, flies off with a frog splash. The Honda Center is overjoyed to watch The Natural plow into Krista’s raised knees! Joining their cheers in the arena soundtrack are Wright’s pained screams as he bounces away from Krista. COACH Naw, man! How you gonna miss ya move like that? How you gonna miss ya move, son? Equally as perturbed is Wright, who lies face down on the canvas, uttering profanities that haven’t been heard since Taming of the Shrew was first enacted. Krista remains fatigued, all the bones in her body feeling as heavy and impossible to move as solid steel. She’d like nothing more than to reach her corner for a much needed tag with Zack, but her burned out body won’t even being to cooperate with her. “LET’S GO KRISTA! LET’S GO KRISTA! LET’S GO KRISTA!” COLE Southern California getting behind its homestate hero! MACKENZIE Only because they know if they don’t, her congressmen daddy will introduce legislation to raise taxes by a billion percent. There’s some life left in Krista; she brings her arm off the canvas, shaking it as though she were trying to will all the strength in the world to come to her. The audience sees her admirable sprit and increases the volume behind their already loud chants. Off to the side, Wright is forced to rely on his own will and the ropes as his support. Though, paltry they combine in bringing him to his feet. As the fans reach their loudest point yet, Krista finds her footing. Wishing to draw first blood, she rushes across the ring and leaps at Wright for her KIDology. But, Christian counters her in mid leap and leads her into the air for a Wright Off! However, she locks her lovely legs around his neck and hauls him downwards in a hurricanrana into a pinfall! Buzzlefoxer drops down to score the fall as the audience explodes with glee. ONE! TWO! THREE! “YEAAAAAAAAA!” BUFFER Christian Wright has been eliminated! COLE The Dream Team has evened upped the odds and turned a dream matchup into a nightmare for The Steamers! Moneymaker hasn’t the slightest clue how to continue; he doesn’t know whether to bury his head into his hands and cry, or to use those hands to plug his ears in protection from raucous ovation of the Honda Center. Unnoticed by Moneymaker in his bewilderment, is an outraged Wright procuring a chair form beneath the ring. Very much aware of Wright’s actions, the audience blasts him with heat as he enters the ring. Their words change from that of hatred to that of warning as he winds up to take a swing at Krista. But she ducks bellow his incoming attack and the metal object slams into Buzzlefoxer’s head! “OOOOOH!” reacts the audience as the 86 year old capsizes to the canvas. MACKENZIE That’s what you get for that glory hole crack. God don’t like ugly, Clem. Wright hasn’t the slightest bit of concern for the fact he may have killed the oldest person in the OAOAST. Instead he directs all his energy and focus to turning around and smashing Krista in the back with his chair! Krista crumbles to the canvas, hollering as agony bursts all across her back. There’s no chance for CW to celebrate as Malibu wipes him out with a diving forearm! The two exchange punches, jumbled in a tangled heap that rolls them straight out the ring. After hitting the floor they both speed to their feet, but Zack isn’t quick enough to best CW and The Natural punts him in the testicles with a brutal kick! “BOOOOOO!” the fans hiss at CW, while Zack is left paralyzed by the pain that explodes throughout his netheregions. “Though my flame in this blazing fire has been extinguished, you Zachary Malibu, you will find that your own end is neigh!” Wright shouts over his shoulder, sulking along the entryway. MACKENZIE So much for those evened up odds. Life is so, so good when you’re bad! Meanwhile inside the ring, Mister Dick dives upon Krista for a fall. COLE What is he doing? There’s no referee to even count the pin. How wrong you are! Allison comes darting down the ramp, attired in traditional referee garb. Met with a chorus of jeers and disdain, she slides into the ring to make Krista’s loss official… ONE! TWO! Krista kicks out of certain defeat, drawing a grandoise shout of happiness from the audience. Their noise level is amazing, a huge outpouring of cheers and chants, all with the single task of bringing about a victory for the walk of famer. COLE The Dream Team is hanging on, somehow they’re hanging on! The support of the audience is an invigorating potion that restores Krista with the life she needs to get upright. Unfortunately for her fresh foe does the same, with full intention on bringing his rival’s time in the match to an end. Mister Dick pounces on her and bombs forearms across her back that permit him to irish whip her to the corner. Moneymaker now enters the ring to try and lacerate her with a lariat. But she thrills her homestate, by rolling beneath his arm. While the Billion Dollar Heir is nauseated by his violent crash, Krista unfurls her body and lays out MD with a high knee lift. Just as Moneymaker is beginning to recover, Krista closes the gap between them and knocks him over with her buns of steel! Terribly exhausted from this latest burst of energy, she makes a mad dash to her corner to tag in The Franchise before collapsing! “YEAAAAAAA!” comes the mighty scream of the audience, and even though Moneymaker doesn’t see Zack he knows well enough to make a hasty retreat. Thankfully his escape is given aid by Allison who runs interference by lecturing Zack on his many personality flaws. Of course Zack isn’t keen on being dressed down by his ex, and brushes Allison, still screaming, aside. But Allison’s annoyance worked to Mister Dick’s benefit as he’s able to meet Zack with a pair of left hands. But the blows are taken in stride by the POP and he comes back with left hands of his own! Realizing the punches are doing nothing to hurt Zack, MD launches a lariat at him. But Malibu ducks and the errant strike cause MD to go in a clumsy twirl. Unable to regain his balance Mister Dick is forced onto Zack’s shoulders in a standing fireman’s carry. COLE What does the In Crowd founder have in store? Whatever it is, Mister Dick wants no part of it and furiously elbows Zack in the head. Though Malibu tries to hold strong, the culminated damage of the attacks proves too much and he finally relinquishes the Human Hard On. But Zack doesn’t go on the defensive, instead throwing out a spinning elbow. Yet, Mister Dick catches the Preppy’s arm and uses it in order to fling him towards corner. He runs right after him and leaps upwards to ram his Shiny Metal Dick right down Malibu’s throat! COLE The Deadly Alliance’s newest member just laid right into the In Crowd leader, and you know Alfdogg is sitting backstage loving that. As Zack comes staggering out from his position in the corner wounded by a severe headache, Mister Dick leaps onto the top rope. He makes a dick sucking motion to an elderly lady in the front row, and once that disgusting bit of business is over dives off the top rope to bring Malibu down with a shoulder tackle. Mister Dick then stretches across Zack for a fall… ONESUPERFAST! TWOSUPERFAST! Zack’s left shoulder finds its way off the canvas! Angered, MD smashes his hand against the mat, feeling that an already unfairly fast count wasn’t fast enough. Allison is unmoved by MD’s complaints and with anger flooding her words, orders him to finish off Zack. Problematically, Malibu is pushing onto all fours, with a wild look clouding his eyes. MD snarls in defiance and charges him, but Zack pounces forward and dives to the side to roll him up with a school boy! ONE! TWO! Moneymaker breaks up the pinfall, and then exits the ring as fast as his feet will carry him. Still wishing to lay hands on The Messiash, Zack runs after him with the mania of a feral wolf. But his chase is cut short when MD snares him into a full nelson and gives him Pure Penetration! COLE He hit it! Mister Dick hooks Zack’s leg for a pinfall SUPERFASTONE! SUPERFASTTWO! SUPERFASTHREE...NO! The crowd roars, and Mister Dick can hardly believe his horrible luck. He gets up and approaches Allison again, then waves her off in annoyance, pulling Zack back up and hitting him with a second Pure Penetration! MACKENZIE I think somebody just likes to say the words “Pure Penetration”. Rolls of the tongue so well. Mister Dick makes another cover, and Allison makes another ultra fast count. SUPERFASTONE! SUPERFASTTWO! SUPERFASTHREE! FOOT ON THE ROPES! COLE The Dream Team is still in this contest! The fans are on their feet and so is The Human Hard On. But while they may cheer their lungs out, Mister Dick is tearing his hair out in a mad fury. At Allison’s behest, he let’s go of his own hair to grab hold of Zack’s and bring the prep to his feet. He throws Malibu to the ropes, and lowers his head, expecting to be leapfrogged. But The Franchise throws him for a loop and kicks him in the chest! MD rockets upright, screaming in pain. But his shouts are muffled into silence when Zack corrals him into an inside cradle. ONE! Moneymaker into the ring! TWO! But Krista dropkicks him away! It doesn’t matter however as Mister Dicks pops out the unexpected pin on a well delayed two count by Allison. COLE Dammit this isn’t fair! She has no right to even referee this contest! Malibu could never have enough patience to argue with Allison over her miserable officiating, and so instead continues to battle MD. He drags him up by his curly brown hair, but halfway up, the Cocky Prick blasts his foe with a low blow. As the fans boo the lowdown tactic, MD takes a step back to admire his treachery. Done with self congratulating he sends his foot forward in a School’s Out! But Zack ducks the finisher theft and runs beneath the former Aggie’s lanky leg. As MD turns around to get a bead on Zack, the former world champ clocks him with the School’s Out! The fans come unglued for the legendary finisher as Zack drops down onto The Cocky Prick for the pivotal fall. COACH Come on, Mister Dick! You gotta kick out! Actually, no he doesn’t, as Allison flat out refuses to perform a count. No excuses. No pretending to see a fly. She simply refuses to count. These shenanigans devour any chivalry Zack once had, and his eyes blaze with ill intent towards Allison. Thankfully for his good guy image Krista does the dirty work and spears her to the canvas! The lovely ladies roll across the ring and dump themselves to the outside. Allison isn't any match for the 4 time tag champion, and against her will is slung across Krista's knee. Cackling with mischievous glee, Krista arches back with her right hand brings it across Allison's BUTT! Then sudden she reaches back once more and delivers another stroke over Allison's ass. Krista continues to spank Allison at will, while Zack's former lady love shrieks for help that will never come. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Zack’s enjoyment of raunchy show is snuffed out when The Billion Dollar Heir strikes him from behind with a running axe handle smash. COLE Here we go! Zack Malibu and Theodore Moneymaker hooking up for the first time since Angleslam! Round 2 of Malibu/Moneymaker goes the Billion Dollar Heir’s way as he manages to push Zack into the corner with a flood of elbow strikes. Moneymaker then punishes his archenemies with furious knees to the gut that leave Zack weak and nauseous. He seizes on Zack’s vulnerability by hooking him into a front facelock for the Spear Of Longinus! But The Messiah can’t keep his hold for more than a few seconds before Malibu’s regained strength allows him to power out his grip. Now free of Moneymaker, The Franchise tags him with a rapid fire series of jabs! COLE That’s gotta feel good for Zack! Unfortunately the joy isn’t long lasting; Moneymaker puts an end to Zack’s flurry with a jawbreaker. Attempting to finish Zack before he can gain his second wind, Moneymaker pounces on her with the Bank Vault sleeper hold. The affects of the signature move are immediate, a painful constricting of his breathing. This is more then a mere rest hold, for Zack this is onerous battle to remain conscious. Moneymaker does his effort to stay awake no favors cranking on his neck as roughly as his strength will allow. The supportive crowd continues the task of rallying the babyface, singing his name. Drawing strength from their kindness, The Franchise hammers his elbows against Moneymaker’s stomach. At first they have little effect but overtime they serve to weaken once epic restraints, and Zack breaks free of the finisher! COLE He’s out! Zack stuns Moneymaker with an inverted atomic drop that doubles him over, then hits the ropes. As Zack comes off, his feet rise from the canvas, and the point of his knee heads to the side of Moneymaker’s head. The Messiah avoids a certain concussion by sliding his skull out the way and Malibu whiffs on the Zack Attack attempt. Moneymaker takes a moment to breath a sigh of relief, and once his breath is caught he grabs Malibu in a front facelock for the Spear of Longinus. But Malibu angrily shoves him back. As The Messiah tries to regain his footing, the deadly School’s Out comes his way! Fraught with panic, Moneymaker dives backwards as if he were trying to escape the swipe of a grizzly bear. And with Zack snarling at him like that very same animal, the tycoon realizes its best to wave his white flag. Thus with his health relatively intact he slides beneath the ropes, and hastily retreats up the ramp. Though he hangs his head in defeat, he's at least content with the knowledge he'll live to torment Zack another day. “BOOOOOOO!” hisses the audience as Zack leans over the ropes and with voice full of fire demands Moneymaker returns. But the billion dollar heir Moneymaker continues his trek without even acknowledging the calls to action. Zack now sees he has no choice but to fetch his foe himself. But, his mission is put on hold by Mister Dick coming in and dropkicking him in the side of the face! MACKENZIE We’re still in this, or so it would seem. MD waits for Malibu to stand, and when he does, The Human Hard On surges forward to connect with the Stiff Kick! Down goes Zack crumpling as though a spear were just driven through his face. Mister Dick promptly dives on top of him, looking to close the book on this match once and for all. Referee Charles Robinson slides into the ring to make the count… ONE! TWO! A returning Krista breaks up the fall, bringing a gigantic eruption from the city of Anaheim, and an eruption of anger from Mister Dick that materlizes as him lunging at tanned goddess! But, he falls right into Krissy’s trap; her legs jump into his upper body and her knees cave in his chest with the KIDology! While the audience continues to sing with joy, Krista rolls him onto his back to win this war… ONE! TWO! MISTER DICK KICKSOUT! COLE I don’t believe it! I don’t believe it! The fans fall back into their seats, unable to comprehend the incredible fight Mister Dick has shown tonight. More hopeful than Anaheim is Miss California, who drags MD off the canvas. Krista traps the still stunned Real American Dick into a butterfly suplex, but though she has the will, she’s lacking the strength to suplex him over. Her futile efforts cost her dearly; Mister Dick powers out of her grip to hoist onto his broad shoulders. “You gonna get cock blocked, bitch!” Mister Dick bellows to wrathful booing of the audience. COACH It’s that time! But Mister Dick’s finisher is interrupted by a School’s Out that impacts precisely with his chin! Eyes roll back into his head, blood flies from his mouth, and the 6’4 powerhouse topples over with Krista landing on top of him. COLE That could be the biggest School’s Out of the night! Zack and the audience hold their breath and hope against all hope as they watch Robinson count this latest fall… ONE! TWO! THREE!!! MACKENZIE 35 minutes next to Michael Cole, just to watch my team blow a 4 on 2 lead. Could it have been any worse? I suppose I could’ve spent 45 minutes next to Michael Cole. COLE I also could’ve been naked. And erect! A shout of euphoria comes from the stands and the rocks the arena to its very core. The Franchise falls to his knees, overwhelmed by feelings of small joy for the victory, and extreme disappointment over Moneymaker’s cowardly escape. Krista tries to cheer Zack out of his doldrums, but nothing short of Moneymaker’s lifeless body at his feet could bring a smile to the In Crowd leader’s face COLE They did it. Zack Malibu and Krista Isadora Duncan came form behind to overcome the odds and pull off a miracle. What a triumph from our biggest male star and our biggest female star! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen the survivors of this contest…ZACK MALIBU AND KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN! The remaining members of The Dream Team enter to fantastic cheers the OAOAST Marks. Bo helps up Zack up and gives him the most non-homosexual hug he can manage. The Blonds check on Krista’s health and Ned offers profuse apologies Krista plays nice and doesn’t wonder why of all the things Ned should apologize for, he picks a DQ in a wrestling match. With the two survivors in good health, the Dream Team joins hands and lifts their arms in exultant celebration. The standing audience does the same, cheering as loud as their voices will allow as red white and blue conffietti rains beautifully down from the ceiling. I like confetti because it makes me forget that my dad beat me.

The bell sounds to signal the start of the action, and from across the ring, Malibu locks eyes with the captain of the opposition. Everyone on Malibu's team clears out to a loud pop, and Malibu gets in the ready position, waving Moneymaker on. Looking disgusted by Malibu's bravery, Moneymaker clears his team out, telling them to get out on the apron. All four do so, and Moneymaker rolls his wrists, ready to lock up...then turns around and tags in Christian Wright! COLE Oh come on, already with the cowardice! COACH Cowardice? That's one of the smartest men in the world, Mikey Cole. Why should he have to get his hands dirty right off the bat? That's the team captain! Wright dashes in, and he and Malibu lock up before Malibu can protest Moneymaker's backing down. The two struggle for position, and Zack sends Wright to the ropes, then drops down onto his stomach. Wright goes over him, and Zack comes up then leapfrogs over him on the rebound charge. Wright hits the ropes a third time, and Zack nails him with a beautiful dropkick! Wright dusts himself off and comes up, but Zack follows with a charging clothesline to put him over the ropes and out to the floor, then turns to the corner and shouts for Moneymaker to come at him...and Teddy responds by sending in Logan Mann! Logan charges in, a bit overzealous, and gets hiptossed over by Zack. He gets up, but walks right into an inverted atomic drop, then thrown overhead with a belly to belly suplex! Aching, Logan rolls out under the bottom rope, and now Moneymaker is pissed, as he, Synth and Dick hop off the apron to regroup with CW and Mann. COLE Malibu took this match, hoping that he would finally get his hands on the man hellbent on ruining his reputation, but Moneymaker is sure doing his best to avoid that confrontation! Just as flustered as his captain, Mister Dick hops up on the apron and mouths off to Malibu before stepping through the ropes. Zack, all too eager to take on the former Gunslinger ties up with him, but finds himself shoved down to the canvas! The crowd boos as Mister Dick pounds his chest in triumph. Zack gets up and SHOVES Dick, drawing his ire, then rolls under a clothesline attempt! He pulls Dick into a headlock, but gets shoved off towards the ropes. Malibu comes off and leapfrogs over Dick, then makes a quick tag to Bo as he hits the far side! When Zack rebounds, he slides through Dick's legs, and Dick drops his head as to not lose track of Malibu...but when he comes up, it is he who is blasted with a hard lariat, as Bohemoth bursts into the ring! COLE Nice, quick tagging and teamwork there by the member of The In Crowd! Bo gets Dick and hurls him into the corner, then charges in with a shoulderblock to the ribs...but Dick gets a knee up, and Bo eats it! The Metrosexual Monster staggers back, and Dick pushes himself up onto the middle rope...but Bo races towards him and hurls him down to the canvas with a military slam! COLE I bet Dick is sore after that! COACH That's not the first time you've said that tonight, is it? Angered, Dick stands up, favoring the small of his back, then tags in Christian Wright once again. The man who brought Bohemoth to the OAOAST in the first place comes into the ring and goes eye to eye with his old charge, then slaps him across the face, telling him "you're here because of ME!" Caught off guard, Bo snickers at the slap, then wraps his hands around Wright's throat and lifts him off his feet into a hanging tree choke...but Wright rakes the eyes to save himself! He clubs Bo across the back, then readies him for a suplex...but the big man puts the brakes on! Second attempt is a failure as well, but then Bo reverses, lifting him up for a suplex but throwing him down face first! Wright reels from the toss, but as Bo moves in for him, he quickly uses a go-behind and shoves Bo into the heel corner, where all four of Wright's teammates lean over the ropes and get their licks in! The Blondes, Zack and Krista all protest, but all referee Clem does is issue a stern warning over the infraction, and backs away as Wright finally gets off his suplex, taking Bo to the canvas. Wright then stands up and rakes the laces of his boot across Bo's eyes, then runs the ropes and drops an elbow on the prone big man. Wright then rolls to his feet and tags in Logan Mann, the Macho Macho Mann himself! Bo gets doubled over by a kick to the gut, and then Mann quickly tags in Synth. The Heavenly Rockers now double up on Bo, sending him to the ropes and using their combined strength to press him up and then hotshot him on the top rope! Bo then gets dumped by a double clothesline, and The Rockers celebrate by taunting the crowd, then turning and blocking the referee's view as Dick hops off the apron and scoop slams Bo on the floor, then puts the boots to him! COLE What a dick! COACH That's MISTER Dick to you! The Beverly Hills Blondes rush the ring, moving fast past the ref and brawling it out with the Heavenly Rockers! Christian Wright comes over and aids Dick in stomping on Bo, but they don't notice Malibu race across the apron and nail the BOTH of them with an Apron Run Diving DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE~! Moneymaker is furious, kicking at the guardrail on the outside, and turns around just in time to see Krista launch herself over with a pescado, wiping him out as well! COLE The Dream Team is taking control! COACH Well the referee certainly isn't! Who the hell is legal anymore!? The Blondes have the Rockers set in opposite corners, and call out to each other before sending their foes running...but the Rockers reverse, sending the Blondes crashing into each other! Or not, as Simon leapfrogs over Ned, landing with a Thesz press onto Logan, while Ned tackles Synth to the ground, and both Blondes go to town on the Rockers as the crowd goes wild! COLE Listen to that, Coach. A sound we never thought we'd hear...the crowd is going CRAZY for the Beverly Hills Blondes! Growing frustrated with his inability to keep all hell from breaking loose, Clem Buzzlefoxer pries Ned Blachard up, or at least does his best to get the BHB member out of the ring, and urges Simon to get out as well. The Rockers protest, but as they do, Bohemoth comes back into the ring a little more perturbed, and spears the hell out of Synth! Logan then gets sent over the top by his head, crashing hard at the floor below! Bo whips Synth to the corner and hits a brutal charging corner clothesline, then tags in Krista, who slingshots over into a monkey flip that sends shivers up Synth's tailbone when he lands! Grunting, Synth gets up and turns around...right into a Blue Ball Special, causing his jaw to drop and a scream of agony to emit from his mouth, the likes of which hasn't been heard since Paris Hilton's The Hottie and The Nottie was released upon the moviegoing audience! COACH I'll say this, Mikey Cole, that's one way to take control! COLE I doubt ol' Clem is about to try that one, though. Synth takes a wild swing, but Krista ducks while still holding on to his flesh colored Christmas ornaments. Finally, he grabs her by the hair and snaps her down to the canvas, then hobbles away, tagging in Mister Dick! Krista's nemesis comes in and brings her up, smiling as he presses her over his head...but showboating too much and allowing her to escape! Krista runs him towards the ropes and tries to roll him up, but Dick hangs on, and Krista winds up rolling backwards on her own! Dick rushes her and tries for his patented running boot...but Krista ducks it! The feisty femme fatale hits the ropes and leaps onto Dick's shoulders, but he pulls her up as she tries to bring him over with a rana, leaving himself with a view of what many, MANY men long for. Krista, not happy with the positioning, hammers down on Dick's temple with her fist, releasing herself from his grasp and falling to her feet. Krista then connects with a strike, followed up by a second and a third, and the crowd roars as she reaches for her compact mirror...but a dazed Dick snaps out of it just in time to knock the mirror out of her hand and step on it! The crowd LETS HIM HAVE IT for that one, and so does Krista, as she rears back for the final Vanity Punch...but Dick grabs her wrist and doubles her over with a knee, then hoists her up and drops her across it with a gutbuster! Dick then pulls her up and hoists her into the air, letting the blood rush to her head as she's held upside down for nearly half a minute before being dropped to the canvas! Mister Dick gets up and tags in Theodore Moneymaker, who finally enters the contest as a legal participant, and drops a fist between Krista's eyes, then goes for the cover! ONE! T-NO! COLE It's nice to see the team captain ready to get his hands dirty! Moneymaker brings Krista up and sends her to his corner, then works her over with several back elbows. He sets her up on the top rope, but as he climbs up, she starts firing back, knocking him off! The leader of The Enterprise lands on his feet, but Krista leaps over him, doing a tuck and roll as she lands and comes up in her corner, tagging in Zack! COACH Oh...oh no... Moneymaker turns around, and all he sees is a blur of blue and gold as Malibu is racing towards him...and Moneymaker dives out of the ring! Zack gives chase, and as Moneymaker rounds the corner, both Beverly Hills Blondes hop off the apron and block his path! Moneymaker begs off, trying to gain some sympathy from the reformed rulebreakers. When that doesn't work, he turns around, coming eye to eye with Zack! Moneymaker quickly rolls back into the ring to avoid Malibu, and tags in Synth of the Heavenly Rockers, drawing a tremendous amount of boos as he's again successfully avoided Malibu! COLE I certainly hope this isn't considered leading by example, because it doesn't speak well for the confidence level of the Gang of Five! COACH It's brilliance, Mikey Cole. It's ring generalmanship. COLE Is that even a word? COACH How should I know? Cool people don't carry around dictionaries. MACKENZIE I don't know if the person using the team name that died on the cutting room floor has any reason to speak on word inaccuracy. Synth comes in and goes after Zack, but Malibu sidesteps him and lets him come off the ropes. Zack looks for a hiptoss, but Synth blocks, then swings around Zack's back and pulls him down with a backslide! ONE! Malibu breaks free of the hold and rolls over to his feet, but is soon grabbed by Synth. Before he can be sent to the ropes, Malibu uses his free hand to knock Synth's grip away, then blasts him with a pair of European uppercuts, but misses an enzugiri attempt! Synth drops an elbow, but Zack rolls out of the way of that, and then the two come up, with Zack dazing him with jabs, one after the other, until nailing another European uppercut that puts the Rocker on his back! Malibu then bounces off the ropes and goes for a bulldog as Synth comes up, but Synth stays grounded and throws Malibu off! Synth leans over and tags in Logan, and together the Rockers utilize their tag team expertise, both hitting a kick to the gut and then yanking Malibu down to the canvas. Logan then lifts Synth as if for an atomic drop, but drops his partner into a legdrop on Malibu! Synth heads back to the corner as Logan takes over, striking Zack with a couple of punches to daze him before sending him into motion, bound for a crash into the corner! Malibu takes the impact hard, and Logan comes running with a back elbow that nails Malibu! The former World Champion finds himself snapmared over into a seated position, then Logan hops up on the middle rope and leaps over Malibu, bringing his head forward as gravity brings him down! COLE Necksnap off the middle rope, and the Rockers are having their way with Zack Malibu. COACH They've had their way with everyone in their path...their rock stars! COLE Coach, I think you and I are on two TOTALLY different wavelengths right now. Logan brings Zack up and whacks him across the back of the neck, then hooks an inverted facelock. He tugs at Malibu's waistband and brings him over for a reverse suplex...but Malibu allows the momentum to carry him over and lands on his feet! He hooks a rear waistlock quickly and brings Logan down to the canvas, then stays on top of him as he struggles to get up, striking him with hard crossface shots! Synth comes charging in to break it up, but Zack spears him down when he sees him coming, and then mounts his shoulders, nailing him with hard elbow smashes! Clem urges Zack to get up and stop beating on the illegal man, and Malibu obliges. He turns around and tries for a lariat on Logan, but Logan ducks it and reaches back, snapping Malibu with a neckbreaker! He goes to the corner and tags in Christian Wright, and the INTENSE~! intellectual comes in, first striking Malibu with chops before sending him to the ropes and nailing him with a high knee! Wright then pulls Malibu up and uses an arm wrench, followed by another blistering chop, and then a European uppercut to knock Zack against the ropes! He pulls Zack to the middle of the ring and tries for a butterfly lock, but Zack counters with a fireman's carry and throws him over! Before Zack gets up though, Wright grabs him in a side headlock and takes him down to the mat, but Zack kicks his legs up and scissors Wright's head, using them to pull him off! The two technical wizards come up to the their feet and tie up, with Zack using a go behind, but Christian breaks free and hiptosses Zack over! He leans over to get at Zack, but Malibu kicks him off, and again, both men come up to their feet. Wright charges, and Zack sidesteps him, allowing him to bounce off the ropes. Zack leapfrogs his charge, then spins around just in time to nail Wright with a dropkick that catches him flush on the chin! Wright struggles to his feet and as Malibu charges, he drops back down, sending Zack over the ropes...NO! Zack hangs on, and lands on the apron! He launches himself into the ring with a springboard lariat, but Wright dropkicks him in the ribs on the way down! Zack comes up clutching his ribcage, and Wright plants him with a DDT, then covers and hooks the leg! ONE! TW-KICKOUT! Wright rolls Zack to his feet, and drags him to his corner, where Mister Dick gets tagged back in! Wright puts Zack in an abdominal stretch, allowing Dick to clobber Zack across his exposed ribs! Dick then hooks Zack in a bearhug and wrenches his thick arms around Malibu, squeezing the air out of his body and putting pressure on his ribs! Over in the Dream Team's corner, all four of Zack's teammates lead the rally, stomping and clapping and holding their hands out, hoping that Malibu can perservere and make a tag! COLE Malibu's been getting worked over for a little while now, and he'd best get the tag to remain as fresh as possible. With all ten competitors still in this, we've got a long way to go tonight! Zack struggles, but Dick runs him backwards into the heel corner, ramming his back into the turnbuckles, then drags him towards the middle of the ring and applies the bearhug again! Malibu squirms but can't break free, so he does all that he can muster...and headbutts Mister Dick right in the face! Dick covers his face with his hands, thus unable to see Malibu recover and nail him with a bicycle kick! Malibu then hits the ropes, and when he does, Moneymaker lifts his knee up, driving it into the small of his back! Angered, Malibu lunges for him, but Moneymaker hops off the apron again, only to be grabbed by the Beverly Hills Blondes! The BHB grab Moneymaker and roll him in to a big pop! Malibu waits for him, but Mister Dick nails Zack from behind as he waits, then takes Malibu and hurls him out to the floor. Dick goes after him, but the Blondes have Moneymaker in the ring, sending him into the ropes and both sending him up and down with a high back bodydrop! A double dropkick follows, and then Moneymaker gets sent into the corner, while Ned then whips Simon in, nailing the main man of The Enterprise with a corner splash before whipping him out of the corner, right into a Simon spinebuster! The crowd is electric as the Blondes have unleashed the fucking fury on the Most Hated Man in the OAOAST...but now Clem is waving them off, and calls for the bell to be rung! COACH Ha! He counted Zack out I bet! COLE Did he? I can see Mister Dick and Zack brawling it out over here, with Dick doing his best to keep Zack away from Theodore Moneymaker, but if Zack's gone then Dick has to be gone too! Clem, who has HAD IT, scolds the Blondes and points to the aisleway, telling them to get out of the ring. Simon and Ned, completely confused as to what his issue is, are just as surprised (and let down) by Michael Buffer's following announcement. BUFFER Ladies and Gentlemen, the referee is disqualifying BOTH Ned Blanchard and Simon Singleton, citing illegal double teaming! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" MACKENZIE Wow that was a brilliant idea by Zack and Krista to select the Beverly Hills Blonds as tag team partners. I just don't know how to express in words what a great thought that was. They performed so well and were such a benefit to have around. Its amazing, that's what that is Simon and Ned argue their points, and Bo and Krista come in to back them up. CW, Logan and Synth all come in to tend to Moneymaker, and both teams scream and shout from across the ring! Begrudgingly, The Blondes exit the ring and head up the aisle, while down the floor Dick has been sent into the guardrail...not only into it, but OVER IT, as the impact causes him to flop over the barrier and into the front row. Malibu then runs into the ring, amidst the chaos that's been going on since The Blondes were dismissed from the contest, and he is NOT HAPPY! COLE Zack's disposed of Dick, but I'm not sure he realizes what's going on. COACH True dat. He was so busy getting his bell rung he might've confused it with the actual bell ringing! Zack gets into the ring and, after a moment with Bo, confronts the referee, who explains what's going on. Malibu protests, but Clem stands his ground and says they're out of here. Moneymaker laughs heartily at the injustice, while Malibu is left fuming on his side of the ring. Bo, Zack and Krista start to talk strategy, but Malibu is turning redder by the minute!

The view falls on Michael Buffer, standing inside darkened ring that’s only illuminated by a purple spotlight that hangs over the legendary announcer. BUFFER The following is a ten-man, elimination rules match! Team members can be eliminated by pinfall, submission, disqualification, or countout! "If you are what you say you are A superstar Then have no fear The camera's here and the microphones and they wanna know Oh oh oh yeah" Lupe Fiasco’s chart topping track brings down both the red carpet and a wealth of cheers from the Anaheim audience. Onto an entrance stage who’s flashing white lights resemble paparazzi flashes, comes the Beverly Hills Blonds and Molly Nerdly. Silver vest sparkle with gorgeous elegance as the boys strike a victorious pose while Molly Nerdly captures their handsome image on the Siclopse camera. They show respect to their newfound fanbase with bows, and then follow Director Molly down the stage. BUFFER Introducing the Dream Team! Now making their way, from right here in Southern California…they are three time One and Only World Tag Team Champions, being accompanied by Molly Nerdly, they are The Handsome Hustler Ned Blanchard, Box Office Simon Singleton….THE BEVERLY HILLS BLONDS! With Molly keeping her boys in perfect frame, the greatest (male) tag team in OAOAST history struts their stuff down the red carpet. Simon hunches over, bouncing his hands up and down to psyche both himself and the crowd up, while Ned cockily pops the collar on his glittery silver vest. COACH Ingrates, Mikey! Damn ingrates! Mister Moneymaker gave these idiots everything. They’d be working the night shift at Taco Bell with Chris Stevens and AJ Flaire if it weren’t for him keeping their useless asses employed. COACH Moneymaker took Ned, Simon, and Molly for granted. He stopped appreciating them, started finding fault in everything they did, and I hope they eliminate both he and Christian Wright! Reaching the ring, Ned takes to the top rope, and stays true to his SoCal roots by throwing up a hang ten sign. Simon kneels on the apron near Ned’s post, holding his hands out in picture frame. Molly takes time out from serious directing to pose goofily with the group, shooting herself hanging out with her guys. *BbwWbAhmotherfuckerLlIiiBbbEErRrAATtTeeyYyOUUurRrMmmMmMiIInNnDddDd!!* Does Disturbed kinda suck sometimes? Sure! Does Bohemoth? Sure don’t as the uproarious cheers can attest to. Big Bo trots through the entrance way, stopping at the edge of the ramp to flex rock solid muscles that press through shiny leather biker shorts. Done showing off his Mister Olympia worthy body, the big man tilts down his sunglasses and swaggers down the aisle with ice water flowing through his veins. And actually this song is kinda good, but Disturbed still sucks besides this song and In The Fire. BUFFER From Greenville, South Carolina! He weighs in at two hundred and eighty four pounds and represents the In Crowd... a former OAOAST 24/7 CHAMPION... "THE METEROSEXUAL MONSTER"... BBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - HHHHHEEEEEEEEEMMMOOOOOOOOTTHHHHHH!!!!! The beast from the South East stands atop the turnbuckles as cool and collected as he’s ever been. There’s no fear, no nervousness, and no trepidation on his face. A 284 pound rock of confidence, he’s clearly ready for warfare. COLE Any team called the Dream Team has got to feature The Meterosexual Monster. There is nobody bigger, nobody stronger, and nobody nastier than Bohemoth. What a specimen of god's craftmanship! He is every wrestling fan's wet dream! COACH Come off that Elton John shit, son! This dude is the weak link. Ned and Simon know the weakness of Moneymaker and Wright, Krista never loses, and Zack’s a three time world champion. This nigga just big. Oprah is big. You gonna tell me Oprah can come in and start some shit? You gonna tell me Oprah could be spinebusterin dudes all willy nilly? BUFFER And introducing the co-captains! As In My Arms plays to a mammoth ovation the camera pans over an entrance stage coated completely by white tiles designed to resemble a hockey rink. These powerful illumination perfectly fits the sexy dancers dressed in Anaheim Duck booty shorts, and baby doll tees. They twirl around foam hockey sticks, dancing in aggressively sexy movements. But these babes aren’t fighting to gain control over the puck, rather they’re fighting over Miss California. At the center of this shrine of beauty stands the women herself, Krista Isadora Duncan posed on top an oversized Stanley Cup. The statuesque beauty swings her arms through the air, and with a mind on seduction, shifts her slender hips to show off the firm muscles of her creamy thighs. The finest legs on earth are on full display by pink tights that provide as much coverage as a rubber band to her scrumptious bootie. BUFFER She is California born and raised...she is a New York Times best selling author, a reality TV star, the founder of the FIT with KID line of exercise videos, a member of the Hollywood Walk Of Fame, a loving mother, a four time tag team champion, a nine time Angle Award winner, one half of the 2008 Tag Team of The Year, the 2008 Female Personality of The Year, and the current Money In The Bank contract holder, California, she is your very own Miss California Krista Isadora Duncan! COLE Krista Isadora Duncan is very much a part of Southern California culture. She was born here, raised here, and rose to fame here out of a gym in Santa Monica. She attended UCLA, her father is a congressman, and she raises two lovely daughters here in the Golden State. She is a 100% product of the spirit of California. And the very happy mother of a girl who proved her critics wrong and beat Malaysia earlier tonight! COACH Here’s an interesting fact, Krista has beaten everyone on her team. Multiple times! Zack’s been sonned by Krista four times. Ned and Simon 6. “Lucky” Bo’s only been buried by Krista 3 times! What team chemistry they got. Ha! With camera flashes popping off to immortalize her gorgeous image, Krista gives the amateur photographer’s a true work of art, strutting her fashion model walk across the ring apron. She takes a seat on the second rope, and kicks her leg up in order to run her hand down the smooth tanned piece of beauty the audience lusts over. The home audience is promptly sent running for the tissues as she bends over backwards, stretching her legs around the top rope. The melodramatic and potent opening chords of "Getting Away With Murder" pour out the speakers, and the Honda Center responds with ecstatic cheering for the man who has continually battled whatever evil plagues the OAOAST. Their screams get all the more loud when Zack Malibu steps out from behind the entrance doors, his hands clenched in taut fists beside his dark blue tights. The sparks from a shower of golden pyro explode along the entry way as Zack steps through the sizzling display with solemn resolve. He gives a poised salute to his approving fan base, and then marches onward to partake in this landmark matchup. BUFFER Hailing from Providence, Rhode Island and weighing in at one-hundred and eighty-five pounds. He is a three time OAOAST Heavyweight Champion, former OAOAST 24-7 Champion, former co-holder of the OAOAST Tag Team Titles and a former HI-YAH Heavyweight Champion among many other accomplishments. Please welcome a future first ballot hall of famer the leader of the In Crowd and the OAOAST Poster Boy…ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK MALLLLLLLLLLLIBUUUUUUUUUUUUU~! Towering pillars of white pyro come alive with a volcanic eruption, but while they may wow the audience they have little effect on the stoic Franchise. Even those fans that try to offer high fives are met with stern indifference by the usually gracious OAOAST legend. He only discards his hooded vest to the ground and dives into the ring where he has handshakes for every one of his Dreammates. COLE Look how serious Zack is. This match means everything to him. We are going to see the best of Zack Malibu. The Steamers better bring their A game because no one in the OAOAST does it better than The Franchise. HEY WAIT I GOT A NEW COMPLAINT! Leaping out their seats, the crowd spews forth jeers as Nirvana’s grunge track blazes into the arena, and the entrance doors are parted to reveal The Heavenly Rockers– complete with brown themed tights to fit the Cleveland Steamers name. Thanks for dressing for the occasion, gents. The hard rocking foursome poses on the entrance stage with Logan and Holly swapping spit, Synth jamming on the air guitar and Abdullah opening his hands to the power of Allah. Behind them blue and white pyro pillars race across the entry way, flaring even brighter than Abdullah’s gaudy bejeweled headdress. BUFFER Introducing The Cleveland Steamers! First being accompanied by Holly Mann, they are The Only Rock N Wrestling Band That Matters, presented by the great Colonel Abdullah Abir Nerdly, speaker for the prophets, they are The MACHO Macho Man Logan Mann, Synth Abdul Jabbar, THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS~! The audience is all over the Vegas based band, but with Logan and Holly enamored in their game of tonsil hockey and Synth and Abdullah enamored with Koran study, the hostility of the fans is hardly noticed. Once inside the ring, Abdullah, fine spiritual leader that he is, leads the only rock n wrestling band that matters through a Muslim prayer for victory. COLE Motley Crue, Poison, Guns N Roses, Southern California is no stranger to bad boys of rock, and it doesn’t get any stranger or badder than The Heavenly Rockers led by the surly Holly-Wood and the deluded Colonel Abdullah Abir Nerdly. I am a Real American Dick! Exploding on the face of every woman! I am Real American Dick! Suck on my balls, till I cum like Niagara falls! When I come crashing down and its throbbing deep inside I’ll leave you wetter than a flood tide I gotta bend you over that’s how I like to ride! I date a girl who whips my hide And my 12 inches is my greatest pride I am a Real American Dick! Exploding on the face of every woman! I am Real American Dick! Suck on my balls, till I cum like Niagara falls! Womanizer replaces the most offensive song in the history of all mankind, and the audience responds with a tremendous deluge of jeers. This incredible hatred is solely targeted at the man who stands beneath an exquisite golden pyro shower, The Human Hard On Mister Dick. His long lashes hood his dark eyes as he gazes at his hand taking firm hold of his rock hard phallus. Strutting down the entrance ramp with his trademark arrogance he makes certain to threaten and demean as many unprovoked targets as his vulgar mouth will possibly allow. BUFFER Hailing from San Antonio, Texas, he is a former OAOAST One and Only world tag team champion and star of the Texas A&M Football team! He stands six foot four and weighs two hundred thirty eight pounds, now representing the Deadly Alliance, he is The Human Hard On....MISTER DICK! COLE Theodore Moneymaker, the mastermind behind the Steamers, had no clue, none whatsoever that he was selecting the 5th member of the Dangerous Alliance when he arranged this contest. But, as Alfdogg told reporters earlier this week, Mister Dick will do the Deadly Alliance proud and make this a very rough match for The Dream Team. MD dives beneath the ropes, scattering his own partners, who want nothing do with his ring humping routine. He plows into the canvas with the ferocity of a jackhammer and the panting of a wild boar. Once done, he leaps to his feet and hurls a wad of spit in the direction of his foes. Only the fantastic strength of Bo can keep Krista from prematurely getting herself thrown out the contest by attacking MD. The lights in Honda Center fade out as streams of green lazers shoot from the set, obscuring it from view as the classic opening riff leads into the screaming shredding of AC/DC. Yeow! Tailored suits, chaufeured cars, Fine hotels and big cigars Up for grabs, all for a price, Where the red hot girls keep on dancin' through the night. As Theodore Moneymaker and Christian Wright stride past the frantic moving lights, a burst of yellow and green pyro speeds down the entrance ramp. The fans are unimpressed with such flashy tricks and continue to besiege the hated duo with boos. But they remain a pillar of calm class, as Mackenzie DeCenzo, clad in a sexy backless yellow dress, strides out to take both their hands and guide them to the ring. BUFFER And their partners, being accompanied by "The Money Honey" Mackenzie DeCenzo, weighing 8 1/3 bars of gold, now residing in Washington D.C., he is the Enterprise's Financial Analyst, CHRISTIAN WRIGHT! And finally from Vero Beach, Florida, this man needs no real introduction he is the CEO of The Enterprise, the second largest investor in TSM, the heir to Moneymaker fortune, he is THE MESSIAH THEODORE MONEYMAKER! While Moneymaker and Wright approach to a warm reception of hugs and handshakes from their teammates, Mackenzie makes her way over to the announce table. COLE It looks like we have Mackenzie DeCenzo joining us. How wonderful this is for me, being such a big Mackenzie DeCenzo fan that I am. MACKENZIE Oh great. Its bad enough I have to share the same hemisphere with you, but now I have to share the same announce table? God is a woman, and she’s a brunette and that’s why she hates me. Cole, I’m here to lend objectivity and wisdom to an otherwise biased and stupid proceeding. Thank me. COACH Thank you, Miss DeCenzo!

January 1st, 2009 Detroit, MI LIVE ON TSM extra promo space if needed!

CUE: "I'm Shipping Up To Boston" by Dropkick Murphys -The fans immediately rise to their feet, letting out a deafening chorus of boos. The lights flash green and gold as the curtain opens slowly, revealing none other than the Irish Golden Boy, Colin Maguire, Jr. The OAOAST Intercontinental Title belt, as always, slung over his right shoulder. A big smirk creeps out underneath his hood as CMJ looks around at all the booing fans. He shrugs, bounces from side to side, and begins his long walk down to the ring. BUFFER "Ladies And Gentlemen! This next match...is scheduled for one fall...and is a TRIPLE THREAT MATCH FOR THE OAOAST INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP!!!!! Introducing first, making his way to the ring, weighing in at Two Hundred and Ten pounds...from Boston, Massachusetts...he is the IRISH GOLDEN BOOOOOOOOY...COLIN!! MAAAAAAAAAGUUUUUUUUIIIIIRRRREEEE!! JUUUUUUUUUUUUNIIIOOOOOOOOOOOORRRR!!!!! COLE This man has some nerve showing up here tonight with that title belt slung over his shoulder like he earned it! COACH He DID earn it!! Just like he said, every single time he has faced Jereme Grey for that belt, CMJ has been SCREWED out of it! He PASSED out in a submissions match for it! His sister Evelyn did a fast three count the next match! CMJ, in my eyes, is the REAL OAOAST Intercontinental Champion! COLE Thank God the only things seen through your eyes are restraining orders and alimony letters. COACH ...Ow. -CMJ slowly climbs into the ring, then up the turnbuckle, raising the IC title belt high into the air, causing the boos to increase in both number and volume. CMJ smirks and hops into the ring, handing the belt to the ref as he takes off his track suit top and tosses it out of the ring. The lights go off. CUE: "Paint It Black" by The Rolling Stones -The cheers are off the charts as the eerie opening guitar riff plays. Suddenly, the drum beat spells out letters on the AngleTron R A G D O L L RAGDOLL Hear that? Yeah, you can't. Because the cheers are deafening. The lights start flashing red, purple, and green as the curtain opens once again, revealing Austin "Ragdoll" Baker, still clad in his Joker costume from the Halloween Spectacular. Ragdoll stands at the top of the ramp, smiling straight at CMJ. He suddenly shoots his head to the side, cracking his neck, before making his slow walk down to the ring, singing the Stones!~! song to himself as he does so. BUFFER "And his opponent...weighing in at One Hundred and Ninety Pounds...from LAS VEGAS, NEVADA!!! HE IS A LEGEND OF THE OAOAST RING....HE IS AUSTIN....RAAAAAAAAAAGDOLLLLLLLL....BAAAAAAKEEEEEERRRRR!!!!" -Ragdoll slides into the ring, just as CMJ makes his quick departure from it. CMJ smiles smugly to Ragdoll, who returns the smile. Ragdoll's is creepier. WHAM!!! The fans once again erupt as CMJ gets laid out on the outside!!! COLE IT'S JEREME GREY!! HE CAME IN THROUGH THE CROWD!! COACH Slimy French bastard!! -Ragdoll's entrance isn't even done yet, and Jereme Grey has already made an impact in this match. The song fades out as Jereme slides CMJ back into the ring, then quickly follows. Ragdoll moves slowly towards the far corner, his eyes never leaving the action unfolding in the middle of the ring. CMJ covers up opposite Rags, while J-Grey drives devastating boots to the head, face, and chest area. DING DING DING!! COLE ...And the match is underway? -Jereme quickly picks CMJ up and pushes him into the corner before...WHACK!!! FANS/RAGDOLL WHOOOOOOOOO!!!! -...WHACK!! FANS/RAGDOLL WHOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! -Jereme decides to ditch the knife-edge chops, and instead begins delivering blistering rights and lefts to the face of CMJ. As soon as one fist leaves his face, Jereme replaces it with the other. The flurry continues as Ragdoll cocks his head to one side and leans in the corner, folding his arms across his chest. COLE Ragdoll is just WATCHING as Jereme Grey devastates CMJ!! COACH What would you do, Mike? Try and stop him? Ragdoll is playing it VERY smart here. He's letting J-Grey and CMJ expel energy and get tired, while he waits to pick up the scraps! It's a genius move! -Ragdoll chuckles slightly as Jereme continues his onslaught. J-Grey suddenly grabs CMJ by the wrist, and with all his might, whips him towards the other corner. Ragdoll's eyes go wide as he lets out a yell and scurries out of the corner, just as CMJ's chest hits the top turnbuckle, causing the Irish Golden Boy to let out a giant *HUFF!* He back out slowly, but is quickly shoved right back in, thanks to a Jereme Grey flying knee!! CMJ steps back slightly as Jereme rolls backward...WHAM!! A diving knee chop takes CMJ down! CMJ quickly rolls out of the ring, but Jereme is right behind him. Meanwhile, Ragdoll's eyes are fixated on the two as he reaches into his pocket and pulls out... COLE A pack of cigarettes! COACH THERE'S the Ragdoll we know and love!! -Ragdoll pops a shmoke into his mouth as he fumbles about in his other pocket for a lighter, which he finds. Ragdoll ignites the flame and lights the smoke, before tossing the light out into the crowd. Ragdoll leans on the top rope, watching Jereme continue to kick the shit out of CMJ on the outside. "ONE!!" -Ragdoll's face suddenly expresses "quizzical." "TWO!!" -He quickly turns towards the referee, who raises three fingers. "THREE!!" COLE Ragdoll looks confused! -Ragdoll slowly shakes his head and motions for the ref to come over to him. The ref abides and walks over to the former X champ, who tries to talk some sense into him. The ref shakes his head as he backs up. "FOUR!!" -Ragdoll stares at him for a second, before advancing. Ragdoll suddenly pushes the ref into the corner, holding his lit cigarette a centimeter from his eyeball. The ref agrees now. Ragdoll smiles and nods as he backs away. He leans against the top rope again just in time to see Jereme slam CMJ's head into the barrier. The ref heads over to the other side of the ring and yells something to buffer, who nods and puts the mic to his lips. BUFFER "Ladies and Gentlemen...this match is now NO DISQUALIFICATION!!!" -The fans erupt as Ragdoll looks over to the ref, who glares back. Ragdoll gives him the thumbs up, just as Jereme tosses CMJ back into the ring and follows close behind. Ragdoll, ever the opportunist, delivers a swift kick to the ribs of CMJ, who once again lets out a loud *HUFF!* Jereme stands quickly and glares at his cousin-in-law, who points to CMJ. "I'm helping you out!" Ragdoll yells. Jereme shakes his head before focusing his attention back on CMJ, who is trying to crawl out of the ring. Jereme catches up to him and grabs him by the foot, stopping the Irishman in his tracks. CMJ grabs onto the bottom rope as Jereme tries to drag him into the center of the ring. CMJ is having none of it! CMJ pulls himself in closer to the rope, wrapping both arms around it, just as Jereme grabs onto his other ankle. Jereme once again tries to pull CMJ in, but CMJ holds on too tight. Jereme shrugs slightly, then...WHAM!! The fans erupt as CMJ lets go of the rope, and instead holds on to his jewels, which are surely black and blue from the vicious soccer kick from Jereme Grey! COLE We are seeing a very vicious side to Jereme Grey here, Coach! COACH Yeah, the Frenchie finally grew some balls. Whoop-de-shit. -Jereme slowly turns towards Ragdoll, who is still leaning in the corner furthest from them. RAGDOLL -Jereme shakes his head once again as he turns back towards CMJ. Jereme leans down slowly, grabbing his archenemy by his hair. Jereme brings CMJ to a standing position, pushes him into the ropes, and irish whips him. CMJ hits the opposite ropes and rebounds, AND BARELY DUCKS A J-GREY CLOTHESLINE! CMJ once again rebounds, just as Jereme turns. CMJ leaps...WHAM!! Both men hit the mat hard, but it's Jereme clutching at his jaw, thanks to the flying shoulder tackle from CMJ! COLE A desperation move from CMJ!! COACH Desperation my ass! He planned it from the get-go. -Ragdoll smirks as he takes one more drag off of his cigarette before flicking it out towards the ramp. He cracks his neck quickly, before squatting slightly, his eyes watching CMJ, who is slowly pushing himself up. The fans all stand as Ragdoll mouths, "come on. get up. get up, collie. come on." His eyes never leave the Irishman, who slowly gets to a knee. This is Ragdoll's cue! He takes off running, and leaps over the now-pushing-himself-up Jereme. CMJ turns his head slightly, just in time to a see a kneWHAM!!! COLE/COACH DEVIL DOLL!!!!! -The fans erupt as Ragdoll's momentum causes him to fly a bit past over the now crumpled CMJ. Ragdoll scrambles on his hands and knees towards his victim. Cover!! The ref drops!! ONE!! TWO!!! THNO!!~ COLE Jereme broke up the pin!! -Ragdoll groans loudly before looking back towards Jereme. Ragdoll shakes his head...before leaping over the near-dead CMJ! Ragdoll quickly wraps his hands around Jereme's throat, attempting to choke the life out of him!! The fans erupt as the two roll around on the ring, all four hands wrapped around a throat. Ragdoll positions himself on top (no homo) and pulls away from the choke, before he lifts his right hand...WHAM!! A vicious punch...WHAM!! A left hand punch follows! WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! Blistering lefts and rights pummel Jereme, who tries his hardest to block the onslaught! Ragdoll quickly stands, grabbing Jereme by the arms as he does so, lifting the champ to a standing position, before dumping him to the outside!! Jereme tumbles out and hits the mats hard, but regains his bearings, just as Ragdoll once again scrambles over to CMJ!! Ragdoll once again covers, this time hooking the leg!! ONE!! TWO!!!! THNO!~! COLE JEREME JUST PULLED THE REF AWAY!! -Ragdoll once again groans and pushes himself off the dead man as the ref looks out at Jereme, giving a "DUBTEEEF?!" look. Ragdoll chuckles as he stands quickly, backing away from where Jereme is. Ragdoll lifts one hand, motioning for Jereme to bring it. The cheers grow louder as Jereme slides into the ring...AND COVERS CMJ!! ONE!!! TWO!!! THNO!~! COLE NOW RAGDOLL BREAKS UP THE PIN!!! -Ragdoll's size 10 boot slams into the back of Jereme's head. Jereme clutches it as he gets picked up. Ragdoll once again dumps Jereme out of the ring, but Jereme holds onto the middle rope, causing him to only land on the apron! He stands quickly and whistles, causing Ragdoll to turn back towards him, just as Jereme leaps up onto the top rope! He pushes himself off and jumps towards Ragdoll! Jereme wraps his legs around his head and spins...LA RÉVOLUTION!!! COLE A SPRINGBOARD SPINNING HURRANCANRANA!! Did you know he could do that, Coach?! COACH Didn't know, didn't care. I must admit, I am pretty impressed by Jereme tonight. -Ragdoll clutches at the back of his head as Jereme stands quickly. FANS "JER-UH-ME! JER-UH-ME! JER-UH-ME!!" -Jereme looks between the two men...and once again covers CMJ! The ref once again drops as Ragdoll slides out of the ring, clutching at his neck!! ONE!!! TWO!!! THRNO!~ CMJ KICKED OUT!!! The fans groan as Jereme sits up on his knees, bowing his head in frustration. He stands slowly, just as Ragdoll slides back in...WHAM!!! Jereme screams in pain as the steel chair brandished by Ragdoll hits the small of his back. Hard. Jereme stumbles forward, dropping to a knee...WHAM!! Another scream because of another chair shot to the back. Ragdoll quickly moves to the middle of the ring and unfolds the chair. He moves back towards Jereme and grabs him by the hair. He lifts the champ and pushes him against the ropes, before Irish whipping him past the chair. Jereme hits the ropes and rebounds, just as Ragdoll vaults off the chair....WHAM!! COACH/COLE DEVIL DOLL!!! -The fans erupt!! The force of the Devil Doll causes Ragdoll to hit the mat hard, but he soldiers through and scrambles for Jereme! He covers!! ONE!!!! TWO!!!! THREENO!~! CMJ BROKE UP THE PINFALL!!! -"Are you serious?!" Ragdoll says sternly towards the ref as he sits up quickly. The ref holds up two fingers as CMJ lies beside Jereme, gasping for breath. Ragdoll stands quickly, grabbing the ref by the hair. He picks him up to a standing position and grabs his face. RAGDOLL "Are. You. ?" -The ref shows no fear and stares straight into the eyes of Ragdoll, who stares right back. The two lock eyes for a few moments before Ragdoll smirks softly, and in an instant...WHAM!! DDT!!! The fans erupt as Ragdoll sits up quickly, smacks his lips, and claps his hands together. COLE God! Ragdoll is completely insane! He just took out the referee!! COACH DUHHHHH Genius! We all saw it! -Ragdoll turns his head slightly, noticing CMJ pushing himself up. Ragdoll smirks before standing slowly, and heads towards the opposite side of the ring, leaning against the ropes. Ragdoll makes a "c'mon" hand motion as CMJ continues to push himself up. CMJ is now to a knee...and that's Ragdoll's cue! The fans erupt as Ragdoll takes off running. He sidesteps CMJ and leaps towards the ropes, before placing both feet onto the second and rebounding off. Ragdoll leads with his right knee as he spins...CMJ looks up just in tiWHAM!~! COLE/COACH DEVIL DOLL!! -The cheers are off the richter as Ragdoll scrambles to make the cover!! ..before realizing he just took the ref out with a DDT. RAGDOLL "...shit." -Ragdoll sits up slowly and wipes his nose. He shrugs a little. "Figures," he says before standing up. COACH HA! Ragdoll dug his own grave with that DDT to the ref. COLE Or, Coach...it gives him more time to beat up on his opponents. -Ragdoll strides around the two completely out cold competitors, looking between the two as he walks by them. Ragdoll lightly kicks Jereme in the ribs as he walks past him, before sitting down beside his cousin's body. He lightly motions for a microphone, before pulling out the pack of cigarettes and lighter once more. Buffer slowly walks behind Rags and hands him the microphone as the cigarette is lit. Ragdoll takes the mic as he takes a deep inhale off the cigarette. He slowly blows the smoke out through his nose, before putting the mic up to his lips. RAGDOLL "...Good Evening, Ladies and Gen-tel-mennn. See...I've never enjoyed Mr. Buffer's introductions in this federation...so I figured I'd take a stab at it. Now...to start..." -Ragdoll stands slowly and walks over to CMJ's twitching body. RAGDOLL "...From BASS-ten, MASS-a-CHU-setts. Weighing in at mm-mm-mmmmm sexy...he is the Irish Golden Shower...CAL-in! MAGWIAH! JUNE-YAH!!" -Ragdoll chuckles before spitting on CMJ. The fans erupt as he turns towards the slightly moving Jereme Grey. RAGDOLL "...and the opponent...from Froggyville...weighing in at...some...amount of French numbers...he is the current OAOAST Intercontinental Champion...for...I dunno...until the ref wakes up...Jéremeeeeeee...Griiiiiiiiiiiis... that's his name in French, by the way..." -The fans erupt as Ragdoll takes another drag off his cigarette nodding in approval of the cheers for his cousin. He blows the smoke out slowly as he steps over - and on - Jereme. RAGDOLL "...and THEIR opponent...from The Greatest God Damn City in the world....Las Vegas, Nevada!...He is the SINGLE greatest wrestler to have ever lived! He is the SINGLE greatest wrestler to have ever stepped foot in an OAOAST ring! And he is the SECOND greatest lover his wife has ever had....THE OAOAST ICON OF INSANITY...AUSTIN! RRRRRRRRRRRAGDOLLLLLLLLL!! BAAAAAAA- -Ragdoll's intro is cut short as he is suddenly lifted up in the air by JEREME GREY!! Ragdoll drops the mic as Jereme, using all his strength to lift Ragdoll in a German Suplex..."SHIIIIIIT!!" Ragdoll screams....CRASH!!! The fans erupt as Ragdoll folds up like a chair!! He flops backwards, landing on his stomach, before twisting over onto his back, clutching at the back of his neck. COLE JEREME GREY IS BACK IN THIS MATCH! AND HE JUST TOOK OUT RAGDOLL WITH A HUGE GERMAN SUPLEX!! COACH NO! THAT DAMN FRENCH SNAKE BASTARD!! -Jereme lies on his back, breathing heavily, before finally flipping over. He begins his slow crawl over to Ragdoll, who flops around violently, still clutching his neck. Jereme, noticing the ref is beginning to come to, gently slaps him on the face as he passes him, and now BOTH men are crawling slowly towards Ragdoll. Jereme lifts his arm...AND COVERS!! The ref, trying his hardest to shake the cobwebs loose, starts the count! ONE!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!! THNO!~!!~ RAGDOLL KICKED OUT!~! COLE NO! Jereme was so close to retaining his title! NO!! -Ragdoll starts to laugh maniacally as Jereme covers his face. The screen suddenly produces a small box marked "REPLAY." REPLAY ...THE OAOAST ICON OF INSANITY...AUSTIN! RRRRRRRRRRRAGDOLLLLLLLLL!! BAAAAAAA- -Ragdoll's intro is cut short as he is suddenly lifted up in the air by JEREME GREY!! Ragdoll drops the mic as Jereme, using all his strength to lift Ragdoll in a German Suplex..."SHIIIIIIT!!" Ragdoll screams....CRASH!!! The fans erupt as Ragdoll folds up like a chair!! He flops backwards, landing on his stomach, before twisting over onto his back, clutching at the back of his neck. REPLAY -Jereme stands slowly, grabbing Ragdoll by the hair as he does so. Instead of picking Rags up, Jereme simply drags him towards the far turnbuckle and sits him down in it...WHAM!! A huge right foot stomps Ragdoll right in his grinning face, but the boot only makes Ragdoll grin wider. "c'mon, jer...that was a good one." WHAM! "oh HO! even better, cuz cuz!" WHAM! "shit...ok, THAT one hurt." COLE It seems like Ragdoll is just toying with Jereme! COACH Ragdoll has been put through SO much worse! Glass tables, barbed wire, thumbtacks, chairs, tables...and Jereme Grey thinks that a German Suplex and some STOMPS will hurt him? Please. -Ragdoll begins to chuckle once again as Jereme fumes before him. Jereme suddenly stomps back towards the opposite corner and turns, glaring right at his cousin, who simply smiles. Jereme slaps his right knee, then points to Rags, who twists his neck to the side, letting out a loud crack before making a kissing motion towards Jereme. Jereme suddenly starts to run...BUT CMJ IS UP!! CMJ LEAPS UP BEHIND JEREME AND GRABS HIS HEAD....CRASH!!! COLE D-STREET CUTTER!!! D-STREET CUTTER!!! COACH YES! YES! YES!! -The fans erupt in boos as CMJ covers!! ONE!! TWO!!!! THNO!~! JEREME KICKED OUT!!! The fans erupt as CMJ sits up quickly, covering his face!! COLE JEREME GREY JUST KICKED OUT OF THE D-STREET CUTTER!! UNBELIEVABLE!! COACH ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!~ -CMJ uncovers his face and glares at the reWHAM!~!~ COLE/COACH DEVIL DOLL!! DEVIL DOLL!! DEVIL DOLL!!!! -The fans erupt as CMJ slowly falls backward, just as Ragdoll lands right on top of him! THE REF DROPS!! ONE!!! TWO!!!!! THREE!!!! DING!! DING!! DING!!! BUFFER "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!! YOUR WINNER......AND NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW ONE AND ONLY ANGLESAULT THREAD INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION!!....AUSTIN!! RRRRRRRRRRRRRAGDOLLLLLLLLLLL!! BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRR!!!" CUE: "Paint It Black" by The Rolling Stones COLE RAGDOLL!! RAGDOLL IS THE NEW INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION!!! COACH I'm...strangely okay with this outcome... COLE Ragdoll, EVER the opportunist, SAW HIS CHANCE! AND GOD DAMMIT HE TOOK IT!! -Ragdoll quickly rolls out of the ring and is handed the IC title belt. He stumbles as he walks up the ramp, tripping up a few times, but never letting go of his NEW championship belt. Ragdoll. The NEW OAOAST Intercontinental Champion. Heaven help us. -fade to...

NEW! THE HeldDOWN~! CREDIT CARD THE ROAD TO BANKRUPTCY HAS NEVER LOOKED THIS COOL! Boos ring out through the arena as "The Church Of Hot Addiction" by Cobra Starship begins to play, leading out the member of Cucaracha Internacional. BUFFER This contest is a Traditional Survivor Series Rules Match! Introducing, team number one. At a total combined weight of nine hundred, fifty five pounds... together they compromise CUCARACHA INTERNACIONAL!! Consisting of, the OAOAST World Six Man Tag Team Champions... from London, England... NNAAATTHHHAAAANNIIIIEEEEELLLL BBLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAACCKK!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Striding ahead of his team-mates a scowling Black raises a fist in the air. BUFFER From Vancouver, British Columbia... "THE TRENDSETTER"... JJJJAAAAAMMMMMEEEEESSSSSS... BBLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNDDEEEEEEEEEEE!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Another day, another trend, Blonde rocking a red beanie with the flags of Cucaracha Internacional's very own UN stitched onto a black rim in gold thread. Just don't tell him we're in California under bright arena lights and he doesn't need a wooly hat on, okay? BUFFER From the Isle Of Samoa... "THE SAMOAN WRECKING BALL"... FFFFAAAAAAAAQQUUUUUUUUU!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Blonde backs up a step and slaps his partner on the chest. Faqu follows suit and beats his chest, gabbling away in his native tongue as Blonde nods his head pretending to understand what he just said. The Samoan's third of the title belts hangs over his shoulder, until he feels a little peckish and sticks it in his mouth. BUFFER And, finally, accompanied to the ring by MEGAN SKYE! He is the leader of Cucaracha Internacional and the Team Captain... LLLAAAAAANNDDOOOOOONN... "LA CUCARACHA"... MMMMAAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIXXXXXXX!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Rounding out the team, the team captain is doing his bit for morale by already shaking his head. Blonde's over-exuberant thumbs up doesn't really help and Landon is still a bit distant as he enters the ring. COLE Traditional Survivor Series action here with the members of Cucaracha Internacional, four of them at least, once again holding the World Six Man Championships but suffering a crisis in form if not confidence. With the fierce competition between the OAOAST's major groups recently, Cucaracha Internacional have been struggling to make headway. And losing the titles on Syndicated earlier this month contributed to that. COACH But they won them back within about a week, so it's hardly worth talking about. COLE Try telling Landon that. I don't think he's quite forgiven his team-mates yet, even the one who worships the very ground he walks on. COACH I take it you're not talking about Megan? COLE Hardly. With Landon feeling sorry for himself it's down to James Blonde to try and play motivator to his three team-mates. And Megan for some reason. As he goes around his partners psyching them up, the still nonsensical entrance music that is "Thriller" by Fall Out Boy fires up. Red and blue lights flash out, as an orange pyro missle descends from the peak of the entrance set-up and onto the stage. It lands with tremendous impact, nearly deafening those spectators unlucky enough sit near it. Immediately after the powerful pyro display concludes the lights dim to a troubling blackness (KC-CENSORED Patty-all of KC's snide remarks against me will be striken from the shows!). The home audience is shown an overhead view of the entrance stage, it's metallic floor carpeted by simmering flames that form the shape of a bull's head. The camera then pans downward to reveal the rugged man known as... uhm, Jamie O'Hara! Methinks this isn't what Patty intended when writing this intro in the stats! (Patty-no it wasn't! WTF!) BUFFER And introducing the opponents! Total combined weight, eight hundred and eleven pounds. Introducing first, from Birmingham, England... "THE BIRMINGHAM BAD BOY"... JJJJAAAAAAAMMMMMIIIIIEEEEEE O'HHHHAAAAAARRRRRAAAAAAA!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" The Birmingham Bad Boy shouts out to the crowd, encouraging them to make some noise. BUFFER His partners are accompanied by MELODY NERDLY! First, the team of MARV and MEL... THE CHHRRIIISSTT AAAAIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRR... EEEEEEXXXXXXXXXXPPRRRRREEEEESSSSSSSSSS!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" MARV and MEL rush out and hit their leaping high-five, before tagging hands down the aisle. At first Melody follows them, but leaves them hanging in favour of hooking up with a big, burly Texan. That's sisters for you. BUFFER And, the captain of the team... "THE LONESTAR GUNSLINGER"... BBAAAAARRRRROOOOOOOOOONN... WWWWIIIIIIIINNDDEEEEEEEELLLLLLSSSSSSSSS!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" Finally the entrance makes sense as big Baron walks out, high-fiving Melody who jumps like her brothers. The gentlemanly Baron lets Melody climbs the steps ahead of him as they reach the ring. Baron then climbs to the top rope and raises his arms, with Melody mimicking his actions with an imaginary Wiimote. COLE It will be revenge on the minds of Jamie O'Hara and The Christ Air Express, after they were robbed of the OAOAST Six Man Championships just 11 days after winning them. And the addition of big Baron Windels to the team by Melody Nerdly will definately help the three aerial specialists against the impact of Black and the size Faqu. High-fives go all around Baron's team, before they enter a huddle. As Baron leads the talk, Blonde tries to get a similar huddle going. Problem is Maddix is already out on the apron and Megan is on the floor. Plus Faqu is hardly the huddling type. And neither is Black, who shrugs his annoying partner away and points him to the ring apron. COLE Well in theory Cucaracha Internacional should have the advantage in terms of team continuity. But that theory doesn't take in what's happened the past few months. Cracks starting to show in Cucaracha Internacional. COACH Don't read too much into that. There's just some volatile personalities involved, there's bound to be a few fallouts. COLE Some volatile egos too. Finally Team Baron break and Jamie O'Hara stays in to start for his team. *DINGDINGDING!* COLE Bell sounds and look at who we've got starting. The two Englishman, the two warring Englishmen, Black and O'Hara. COACH These two could fight every day for the rest of their lives and they'd still be swapping punches outside the gates to English heaven. COLE English heaven? COACH Yeah, in my idea of heaven, all the countries are kept apart. I ain't sharing cloud space with no stinkin' Belgian! Bizarre religious theories are set aside, as Black and O'Hara square up in the centre of the ring. Heads touching they start butting at each other, before breaking away and locking up. Black takes the wrist and wrings Jamie's arm then torques it the other way to force O'Hara down to the mat. Top wristlock applied, Black drops a knee onto the point of the elbow! Away rolls O'Hara letting out a shout of pain with Black right on his tail. Black drags O'Hara away from the ropes and controls the arm again, dropping a knee to the inside of the elbow this time, then putting a keylock on it. COACH There you go. Finding himself trapped on the mat, O'Hara tries to kick at Black but both attempts are avoided. So O'Hara fights to his feet, only for Black to use the keylock to drag O'Hara over and back to the canvas. COLE Black trying to keep this on the mat. Whether he respects it or not, he has to recognise O'Hara's ability to use his speed and agility. O'Hara gets to his feet again, making it easier for him to kick. He catches Black in the gut a couple of times, then jumps onto the middle rope. Black loses hold, allowing O'Hara to pull him down with an armdrag! Quickly back to his feet Black swings at O'Hara, who ducks underneath the clothesline and comes off the ropes with a dropkick. Not going down, Black falls against the ropes but comes right back at O'Hara and snares him with another armbar. O'Hara spins out though and leaps onto Black's shoulders, looking for a victory roll... 1... 2... No! Another swing and a miss with a clothesline, O'Hara springing off the middle turnbuckle. But Black sidesteps the moonsault backwards... and NAILS O'Hara with a Lariat as he lands!! "OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Cover by Black... 1... 2... No! COACH You've gotta watch those Lariats. It ain't flashy, but it's damn sure more effective than whatever Flips McGee was tryin' to do. Black pulls O'Hara back up, throwing him face-first into the top turnbuckle. A still winded O'Hara slumps against the turnbuckles trying to catch a breath. But what he does catch are Black's forearms, striking him upside the head from the left and from the right! Black slugs away at O'Hara's head and it's soon clear Black isn't going to let up. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" Finally Black breaks, with complaints from Baron coming from the apron. COLE Black just hammering away at O'Hara, you could feel the contempt behind every shot! Backing across the ring, Black sets himself in the opposite corner waiting for O'Hara to pick himself up. Once he does Nathaniel comes charging, head down... and MISSING, as O'Hara rolls up and out of the corner over Black's body! Black turns and charges again, but O'Hara catches him with another dropkick! Quick tag is made on both sides after that exchange, bringing in Baron and James Blonde, who slams on the brakes when he sees his opposition. "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" Melody leads the chants, as the smiling Texan pats his hands together. Backing away, Blonde eventually finds himself stuck through the ropes getting referee Mike Chioda to back Baron up. COLE Black and O'Hara out before they took each other out at the pace they were going. A little less direct approach from James Blonde, shall we say. Once he's satisfied with the distance between himself and Baron, Blonde re-emerges from the ropes. Before they can lock up though, Melody appears on the apron. She throws Baron something, which he catches adeptly. MELODY Show 'em what a real trendsetter looks like cowboy! To a big pop, Baron pulls on his Stewie Griffin t-shirt! COACH Oh lord. COLE Baron Windels settin' 'dem trends! Surprisingly Blonde doesn't seem too worried and rolls out of the ring, rummaging underneath the apron. And when he returns he too has a fashion statement to make. As he pulls on his t-shirt, we soon see LANDON MADDIX'S face printed on it, much to the man himself's surprise. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The pride of the t-shirts takes over as Baron and Blonde square up, both fired up. They lock up and Blonde quickly grabs a side headlock, before TRYING TO PULL BARON'S T-SHIRT OFF HIS BACK!! Baron fights it and manages to escape out the back, applying his own side headlock. Baron THEN GOES FOR THE T-SHIRT ON BLONDE!! A quick escape from Blonde leads to a stand-off, both men checking their t-shirts are okay before they lock up again. Side headlock by Blonde sees him shot off into the ropes, looking for a shoulder tackle. Baron doesn't move much but Blonde also stays on his feet, putting it down to the power of Landon's head adorning his chest! COLE It's the battle of the t-shirts at November Reign. You see something new every month on OAOAST Pay Per View! Baron backs off the ropes again and Blonde quickly does the same. They collide in mid-ring again, with Blonde just about managing to keep his feet as the impact staggers him. Blonde and Baron square up once more... before the match suddenly breaks down into a hockey fight, both men trying to pull each other's shirts up over their head as they land short punches and knees. They battle for a few seconds, before Blonde pulls away. But he pulls away SHIRTLESS, Baron waving his capture to cheers from his partners. "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!!" BLONDE NO! To add insult to injury, Baron wipes his brow with the shirt... then under his ARMPIT, before throwing it to the outside! BLONDE NO! Blonde charges... and Baron nails him with a big boot! Holding his jaw, Blonde scampers to his corner and slaps Faqu on the leg as he rolls to the floor, making the Samoan the legal man. COACH Mr. Dick's stock is rising day on day. Baron Windels is being outshone by his t-shirt. Entering the ring, Faqu yells at Baron as the Texan whips off his shirt and gets down to business. A quick boot catches Faqu cold, allowing Baron to come off the ropes and deliver a clothesline. Faqu stays on his feet, so Baron lands a second clothesline. This one rocks Faqu back on his heels. Getting up some steam, Baron charges again... but Faqu cuts him off with a thrust to the throat! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Faqu follows Baron into a corner... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and lays a heavy chop into his chest. Doubling up, Baron is pulled back upright and whipped across the ring. He avoids an avalanche though and comes off the ropes, catching Faqu staggering out of the corner with a crossbody block... 1... 2... No! Front facelock by Baron, controlling his opponent as he climbs up. Baron releases Faqu and lands a right hand. A second. And a third. As he backs Faqu up against the ropes Baron reaches out and tags MARV, then whips Faqu off the ropes. A leapfrog by Baron sets the Samoan up for MARV to come in off the top, springboarding and delivering a dropkick on the bigman! "YYYEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" COLE And down goes Faqu! Landon looking even less confident than he did earlier! COACH I've got a bit of a sinking feeling myself. MARV makes the quick tag to MEL, drawing Blonde in the ring to complain. He does his personal Wrecking Ball no favours though as it allows the twins to deliver two Double Kickflips to stagger Faqu, duck a double clothesline and deliver a Bulldog/Front STO combination! By the time Black has reeled Blonde back to the apron, MEL has Faqu down for the count... 1... 2... Kickout. Another quick tag is made and learning nothing, Blonde tries to get in to help. That leads to an arguement between Black and Blonde, distracting the referee. Meanwhile, MARV and MEL take Faqu down with a double drop toehold. MARV backdrops MEL on top of Faqu, then runs the ropes to get flapjacked on top of Faqu as he rolls over! Landon just rubs his head in his hands, as the ref counts again... 1... 2... Kickout. As Faqu gets back up, MARV and MEL tag again. But before they can get to Faqu the big Samoan is called over to the corner and slapped on the shoulder by a deeply frustrated Landon, bringing himself into the match finally. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Alright, let's see if Landon can fare any better. Stepping into the ring, Landon gives his partners a team-talk, which basically consists of "just watch what I do and let me show you how it's done". Having set himself up for a fall, Landon then sprints right into a drop toehold from MEL bouncing his nose off the mat. "YYYEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" COLE I guess not. As Landon nurses his nose, MEL wrings the arm and makes the tag. MARV comes in off the top with an axehandle, then wrings the arm and tags out to Baron. The big Texan comes off the top with an axehandle as well, then brings in O'Hara. Howls of complaint sound out from James Blonde as the Brit also lands with an axehandle across the targetted arm of La Cucaracha. Another quick tag brings MARV in, wringing the arm and then quickly tagging MEL. Together The CAE set up a double whip and deliver a double hiptoss. MARV and MEL then take cheapshots at the rest of Cucaracha Internacional, drawing them in while O'Hara crushes Landon with a Springboard Somersault Seated Senton while he's sat prone on the mat!! COLE The former Six Man Champions are running the rule over Landon Maddix and Cucaracha Internacional! COACH Come on already ref, it's four on one! Once the referee has gained control, he finds MEL covering Landon... 1... 2... 3- NO! ONLY TWO! COLE Oh my, so close! Could you imagine if Landon Maddix were the first man eliminated for his struggling force? This could turn into a very bad night for Cucaracha Internacional if they're not careful! Megan can barely watch by this point as things continue to go badly for her man. The CAE tag off again, bringing MARV in. Retreating into a corner, Landon is caught with a boot and whipped across the ring. Reaching out and grabbing the top rope Landon floats up and over... the invisible man, getting snared by the not-so invisible MARV who times his run to kick off the turnbuckles, looking for the ACID DRO... NO! Landon throws MARV off! COLE There's a little respite for Landon. Breathing a noticeable sigh of relief, Maddix reaches down to pick MARV up... but MARV throws up his legs and pulls Landon forward into a pinning cradle! COLE Spoke too soon! 1... 2... NO! MARV beats Landon to his feet and boots him in the gut again. Firing up, MARV then hits the ropes again... but gets a knee in the back from Nathaniel Black! COLE Hey, come on! COACH Oh, so double teaming and triple teaming is fine, but a little knee in the back and suddenly it's 'come on' all of a sudden? Spinning MARV around, Black delivers a European uppercut from the apron. The referee orders Black back to his corner but the damage has been done, as MARV is scooped up and given the GO 2 SLEEP by Landon as he turns around!! James Blonde quickly jumps into the ring to guard against any attempts at a save, as Maddix wraps MARV up... 1... 2... 3!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" A delighted Blonde gives Landon a far too enthusastic pat on the back and celebrates the mini victory as he goes back to the apron. Melody puts his hands on her hips on the outside as suddenly the match has turned on her. COACH Landon Maddix, leading by example baby! COLE And you can chalk up a heavy assist to Nathaniel Black for that one. Team Baron had everything going their way until the Englishman's intervention from the apron and now, Team Baron are down a man and The Christ Air Express are down a Nerdly! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: MARV Eliminated by: Landon Maddix CUCARACHA INTERNACIONAL 4 TEAM BARON 3 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Landon picks himself up and decides this is the perfect time to give his team another lecture. Unfortunately, Baron Windels disagrees and runs into the ring, pulling him down with an O'Connor roll! 1... 2... NO!! COLE Landon almost got caught again though! Things still aren't running smoothly for Cucaracha Internacional, no matter how you try and sugarcoat it Coach. Landon scrambles back up and eats a right hand! A second. And a third. And a fourth. Blind tag is made as Baron sends Landon off the ropes though, Nathaniel Black interjecting himself legally this time as he knocks Baron down from behind! Black then stomps away until Chioda forces him to let up. COACH Looking smooth from where I'm sitting. COLE Are we watching different feeds or something? Baron's team have dominated this match, Coach! COACH Keep stirring Michael. Just take one look at the numbers and you'll see who's really in control. Picking Baron up, Black lands with two European uppercuts. With a 3/4 headlock he drags Baron over to his teams corner, allowing Faqu to be tagged in. The Samoan comes in with a kick to the ribs of Baron, then stalks after him and strikes down on the trapexius muscle with a mongolian chop. Falling to one knee, Windels is trapped in a nervehold, but is quick to lay an elbow into Faqu's large midsection. And a second. Faqu clasps on a choke though! "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" "FIV..." On Blonde's orders alone Faqu releases the choke and gives Baron a kick to the chest. Faqu then drops a big leg, causing Melody to cover her eyes. 1... 2... Kickout. Baron sits up, but Faqu puts him back down with a hip attack. COACH I tell you one thing, if Baron goes then it's match over. As it is they've still got a chance but without Baron you can't tell me MEL and O'Hara can hang with Landon and the Six Man Champs. COLE Those would be some very unfavourable odds. James Blonde tags in and boots Baron in the head before climbing to the middle rope. The Trendsetter snaps his sweatband and balls up the fist, coming off thee ropes wih the fistdrop. But Baron is up on his feet and CATCHES Blonde in his arms! He then drives JB back into the turnbuckles, driving the wind out of him. COLE Don't go counting Baron out yet though, not by a longshot! An irish whip sends Blonde corner to corner and hard into the turnbuckles again. Baron then draws on the power of more cancelled Fox cartoons as he tells Blonde to BITE MY SHINY METAL ASS!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COACH LOL at these people cheering for a cartoon that's strictly made for DVD. COLE As opposed to running a wrestling company like the SWF whose shows are made for DVD. Because that'd be kinda pathetic too, right? COACH That's completely different... sorta. Diving~! tag brings in MEL, to a cheer. With Blonde still dazed from the BUTT bump MEL delivers a flying clothesline in the corner, landing on the middle rope. MEL pulls himself through to the apron and waits for Blonde to answer to his beckoning, feeding a shoulder through the ropes and then launching back inside with a sunset flip... 1... 2... No! Despite his dazed state, Blonde is able to land a knee to buy himself a few seconds to clear his head. Blonde then clubs MEL in the back, before shooting him into the ropes. A baseball slide takes MEL through Blonde's legs though! As Blonde turns around MEL scoops him for the MELANO... NO! MELA-NO, as Blonde floats over the back and locks on the cobra clutch, setting up ILLEGALLY BLON... NO! BL-ON... I MEAN, BLON-NO... look, MEL counters it, okay! And he counters it by running forward, driving JB's face into the top turnbuckle in his corner! COLE Nice momentum move and there's the tag, here comes J-OH! With Blonde dazed, O'Hara comes off the top with a Moonsault Press! 1... 2... NO! COLE I'm sure it's both cliché and debatable, but I'm going to say it anyway, nobody in the OAOAST gets higher than Jamie O'Hara! COACH And we've got at least two Jamaicans on the roster so that's some claim! O'Hara stomps Blonde up against the ropes, then looks for an irish whip. A reversal sends O'Hara towards the ropes but he's well prepared for any interference from Nathaniel Black wandering down the apron, throwing himself at him with a dropkick! Black goes flying off the apron to the arena floor, while O'Hara quickly pulls the rope down on Blonde's charge. COLE We're about to see it again it looks like! Lining Blonde and Black up, O'Hara hits the ropes... ...but Maddix comes in and cuts him off with a boot, then gives the crowd the 'up yours'! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Landon mocks the rest of his opponents a little, before he and turns hits the ropes himself. But as he rebounds, Jamie O'Hara suddenly goes whizzing past him, THROWING HIMSELF OVER THE TOP WITH A TWISTING MOONSAULT DIVE ONTO BLACK AND BLONDE ANYWAY!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE LOOK MA' NO HANDS! COACH Look ma', no brains more like! That shit was banana! Slowly pulling up on his run Landon looks confused as to what just happened, while O'Hara gets to his feet and slaps some of the fans' hands at ringside. Landon is put to the apron, still trying to figure out what in the heck just happened. Meanwhile, O'Hara throws Blonde back inside and makes a cover... 1... 2... No! Tag made, MEL back in for Team Baron. MEL comes in and manages to prevent Blonde's despairing attempts to tag Faqu and get the hell out of the ring, pulling him away and to his feet. Two quick forearms allow MEL to pull Blonde down with a drop toehold. He then executes La Majistral... 1... 2... No! COLE Baron and his team eager to even up the score here, but give credit for James Blonde, he's hanging in there. For now. Blonde picks himself up and uses another short knee to save himself. With MEL doubled over, he then threads his leg over the back of the head and looks to deliver the Guilt Trip. However, MEL is able to spin out of the back of the move and before Blonde knows what's hit him, he's trapped in a full nelson and faceplanted into the canvas! COLE Oh, big move by MEL. And in perfect position, MEL looking to get high as well perhaps? COACH Yeah yeah, they all like recreational drugs, we get it by now, get a new angle already. Exiting to the apron, MEL gives the signal and heads to the top. The crowd rise to their feet as MEL reaches the third floor and points to the sky, before taking off with majestic form... ...on a MISSED SHOOTING STAR PRESS!!!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE Nobody home! Having rolled out of the way Blonde scrambles to his corner and gets a tag to the team captain. Quick as a flash, Landon is in the ring and catches MEL winded and on one knee... *SMACK!* ...NAILING him with a Low Flying Superkick to the side of the head! COACH DAYYUM! With MEL already seeing stars, Landon quickly pops him up into a fireman's carry. In comes Black to run Baron and O'Hara off the apron, keeping them out of the equation as Landon delivers a second GO TO SLEEP of the match and hooks the leg on the unconscious MEL... 1... 2... 3!!! BLONDE WOOOOOOOOOO!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" A deflated boo from the Anaheim crowd and a dejected look from Melody, sinking a little on the outside. Rolling off of MEL, Landon looks as smug as can be as he makes the tag out to Faqu, more than happy to stand and listen to the sucking-up of James Blonde by this point in the match. COLE And with that Landon Maddix has wiped out both of The Christ Air Express, leaving us at a four against two situation. Team Baron now just Baron himself and Jamie O'Hara, up against the four of Cucaracha Internacional. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: MEL Eliminated by: Landon Maddix CUCARACHA INTERNACIONAL 4 TEAM BARON 2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As MEL is rolled from the ring and checked on by sister Melody, Baron and Jamie regroup on the outside. Realising the deficit they're facing they have a quick peptalk, before Baron re-enters the ring and sizes up Faqu. COACH What did I tell you Michael? Leave it to Landon to get things running smooth again. COLE Well he can certainly afford to look a bit happier with proceedings than he did in the early going. Dare I tempt fate and say things are starting to look up? James Blonde certainly thinks so, grinning like a kid at Christmas as he turns to the crowd and points to Landon, "That's my boss!" As that sickening scene of boot licking continues, Baron and Faqu engage in the ring. They go to lock-up but Baron surprises Faqu with a succession of right hands that start to stagger the big Samoan. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" A knifedge chop, has little effect. And a short Cowboy Bebop elbow across the top of the head similar. Landing a boot, Baron decides at this point to go for broke and scoops Faqu up for a bodyslam... but winds up with all of his 301 pounds crashing down across his chest instead!! COLE Oh no! 1... 2... Kickout!! COLE Nearly disaster for Team Baron! COACH It's all a matter of time now Michael. Baron's their last real slim hope, since O'Hara hasn't got the size to match Faqu let alone what it takes to match the other three opponents. Now Baron's completely knocked the air out of his lungs, he's ready for the taking in my book. Faqu picks Baron up, delivering a hard headbutt. Down goes Baron and Faqu gives the tag to James Blonde who's eager to capitalise. Rushing into the ring, Blonde takes a needless cheapshot at O'Hara to draw him into the ring while he drags Baron over to the corner and lets Landon and Black put the boots to him from the apron! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Now why, with these odds, would Cucaracha Internacional need to go to these kind of tactics? COACH Assurance. Once Chioda has put O'Hara out the boots have stopped, allowing Blonde to drag Baron into a lateral press... 1... 2... No! Tag made back to Faqu, with more dirty work to be done just yet. "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" COACH Ya, cheer all ya like, it ain't gonna make a difference. This ain't a video-game Melody, you ain't gonna cure broken ribs by slapping a turnbuckle a bunch. Faqu scoops and slams Baron with all the ease the Texan failed to find earlier. Off the ropes, The Samoan Wrecking Ball then comes crashing down with a Big Splash! 1... 2... NO! MADDIX Here. Maddix calls for, and gets, the tag ready to lead by example once again. Hitting the ropes, the still smug Landon leaps up to bring all his two hundred, eight pounds down across Baron's chest with a double stomp... and bottoms right out into a back senton for good measure. Reaching back he hooks a leg... 1... 2... No! Not looking unduely concerned, Landon strolls around and decides to pose for the crowd. "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" As Baron gets back up, Maddix meets him with a forearm strike. And a second. Turning Baron around, Landon reaches up and hooks the head, bringing him down across a knee with a modified neckbreaker! Blonde applauds excitedly from the apron as Maddix taunts Melody for no reason other than the fact he can. COLE I think I liked him better when he was sulking. Landon catches Baron on his way up with a straight kick to the chest. Then another forearm. After directing some more words towards Melody, Landon then whips Baron into the ropes. Landon ducks his head... which proves a fatal mistake, as Baron hooks the head and drops him with the BRIGHAM YOUNG COCKTAIL!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COLE Woah! Got him! Baron quickly hooks Landon up... 1... 2... 3!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COACH WHA!? COLE That's three! Landon is out of here! Blonde and Black both react to the surprising turn of events too late to make a save and end up with shocked expressions on their faces, halfway inside the ring. Melody jumps for joy on the floor, as do the fans, as Megan holds her head in her hands. COACH What just happened!? COLE All I know is, Baron Windels just pinned the former World Heavyweight Champion! And the leader of Cucaracha Internacional is gone, we're back to 3 to 2! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Landon Maddix Eliminated by: Baron Windels CUCARACHA INTERNACIONAL 3 TEAM BARON 2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Landon rolls out, Megan is there to great him with words of consolation. Of course, they're negated with the flames from Melody Nerdly as a confused looking Landon (well, he did just get dropped on his head) is shepherded off to the back. Back in the ring meanwhile, James Blonde looks to avenge his fallen leader as he jumps Baron with stomps before he can get back to his feet. COLE James Blonde, like a wronged wife, on the attack! Blonde continues to stomp away, before dropping to his knees and blatantly choking The Lone Star Gunslinger. He quickly breaks but is riled up and almost takes a shot at the referee. Chioda quickly warns him against doing that and the emotional Blonde tags out to Nathaniel Black. Black prevents Baron from getting a tag and pulls him to his feet, driving his elbow into Baron's bicep. COLE Cucaracha Internacional, infact the World Six Man Tag Team Champions, just need to regroup here. Despite that sudden elimination of their captain and in one case inspiration, they still have the numbers advantage. COACH Exactly. Landon has lead the way, now it's time for his team to follow. COLE You mean follow him to the dressing room after being eliminated? COACH You know exactly what I mean bitch. Don't act like you don't know tryin' to act all clever, like. Backed in a corner, Baron's arm is wrapped around the ropes in a painful manner, forcing him to club at Black with his free arm to release it. Black quickly lands a back elbow though, then kicks the ropes and does further damage to Baron's arm in the process. Away walks Baron, Black following after him... and regretting it, as Windels wheels around with a hard right hand! And another! Black responds with a headbutt though. He then sets up an irish whip, but Baron counters and throws a boot... but Black catches it. He spins Baron around... ...and Baron answers with the MYSPACE COMEBACK... just as Black spins around with the BLACK LARIAT, both men nailing their 360 clotheslines in unison!! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE What a head-on collision that was. Both Black and Baron roll away and head for their corners looking for the tag. Melody's encouragement helps Baron even if this isn't a video game... and as Black tags to James Blonde, Baron makes a lunge and TAGS JAMIE O'HARA!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" O'Hara leaps in over the top, catching Blonde with a kick on the way. Hitting the ropes, he then catches Blonde marching towards him with the Busaiku Knee Kick! Cover... 1... 2... No! Irish whip attempt by O'Hara is reversed, sending him into the turnbuckles. Blonde follows up with a clothesline and locks on the side headlock looking for the follow-up bulldog. O'Hara counters by pushing Blonde off, into the ropes. Coming back Blonde throws a clothesline but O'Hara ducks and rolls The Trendsetter up... 1... 2... No! Right back up, Blonde soon goes right back down courtesy of a sweep of the legs, setting him up for a STANDING SHOOTING STAR PRESS~!! 1... 2... NO!! COLE Only two, but O'Hara is starting to build momentum. And once he gets going he's notoriously hard to stop. O'Hara signals to the crowd that the end is near, as he heads up the turnbuckles. As he reaches the top though, Blonde rushes over and cuts him off with a punch. The Canadian breathes a sigh of relief before he heads up the turnbuckles himself. Punches are exchanged as Blonde tries to hook O'Hara in a facelock. O'Hara manages to fight Blonde off though and shoves him off the ropes. However, Blonde lands on his feet. As Jamia starts to get his feet again up top, The Trendsetter quickly springboards off the middle rope AND DROPKICKS O'HARA OFF THE TOP TO THE OUTSIDE!! "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Your boy just got stopped. COLE That had to be at least a 15 foot fall, 80 feet in pro-wrestling terms! Right next to those 2,900 pound steel steps! In the middle of his preening, Blonde orders Faqu to go collect O'Hara for him as he lays in a heap on the floor. Faqu does as he's told, as ever. But as he tries to pick O'Hara up, Baron comes over to protect his partner, nailing Faqu with right hands! COLE It's breaking down here. Baron trying to even the odds. COACH Yeah, but they're not even, are they? As Baron keeps Faqu at bay, Nathaniel Black is on hand to dump O'Hara back inside. He rolls him in to Blonde, who instantly covers... 1... 2... KICKOUT! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" COLE I thought that was it for sure. What heart shown by Jamie O'Hara. Black halts the fight on the floor by blindsighting Baron, running him into the barricade. In the ring meanwhile, Blonde drags O'Hara up by the tracksuit pants. Blonde sets O'Hara up for a back suplex... but Jamie floats over and lands on his feet, dropkicking Blonde in the back! JB falls into the turnbuckles and O'Hara finds enough energy to follow in with a running back elbow. O'HARA THAT'S IT BITCHES! The crowd don't mind the suggestion that they're the bitches being referred to and cheer anyway, as O'Hara again heads up the ropes. On the second rope he gets ready to take flight. However, Blonde reacts and grabs O'Hara's Nike trainer, dragging him off the ropes! The back of O'Hara's head bounces off the mat hard and he rolls away, ending up in position for Blonde to come off the ropes with the LIONSAULT!! 1... 2... 3!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH That's it alright pal. That's it big time. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Jamie O'Hara Eliminated by: James Blonde CUCARACHA INTERNACIONAL 3 TEAM BARON 1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Blonde celebrates his victory, swaggering around the ring as O'Hara is helped out. COLE And the odds just got even steeper. Baron Windels against the Six Man Tag Team Champions, a no-contest on paper, but matches aren't fought on paper and Baron isn't going to give up without a fight here. "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" The crowd try to make themselves a second man for the Texan as he drags himself towards the ring. Before he can re-enter though, he's jumped by Nathaniel Black! Black clubs away at Baron with forearms before throwing him back inside, to the waiting boots of James Blonde. Stomping away, Blonde works over Windels until the signs of life are fading then breaks away to swagger some more. COLE It's hard to find a moment when James Blonde isn't feeling confident, but he's clearly feeling extra confident at this point. COACH Can hardly blame him. Blonde makes the tag to Faqu, ordering him to do some damage. As Baron struggles to his feet, Faqu pins him against the ropes and delivers a thrust to the chest. An irish whip then sets Baron up for a crushing Samoan Drop!! Cover by Faqu... 1... 2... Kickout! Melody tries to will Baron on, as he's picked back up and headbutted by Faqu. COLE These are dire straights for Baron, he's got to start mounting something and quick. He tries to, landing a right hand to the midsection. Faqu shrugs it off though, delivers a second headbutt on Baron that backs him against the turnbuckles and then tags Blonde back in. Directing traffic Blonde whips Baron across the ring for an AVALANCHE by Faqu! Blonde then delivers a corner clothesline, hooking Baron up and delivering the Bulldog! COACH There it is, put him away JB. Blonde, eventually, hooks the leg and kicks back with his legs crossed... 1... 2... NO!! As Blonde complains about the count, Black yells at him to get on with it already. COLE He's got a point. COACH Nat just needs to chill a little. He's an authorative guy, but it's just a matter of time, no need to stress. Calling for one more, Blonde whips Baron into his team's empty corner... or, tries to, but Baron reverses and gives Blonde the BITE MY SHINY METAL ASS treatment again! COACH Okay, maybe stress a little. More than a little, Black enters the ring and charges Baron, who gets up a Big Boot! Baron quickly runs Faqu off the apron for good measure, then goes to the top rope. As Blonde staggers to his feet the big Texan sizes him up and yells that "IT'S CLOBBERIN' TIME"... ...BEFORE TAKING HIM OUT WITH THE DIVING LARIAT!!! COLE Took his head off, that should be one down! Baron hooks up Blonde... 1... 2... SAVE BY FAQU!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE I've gotta believe that would have been it, no way Blonde was kicking out. The Samoan Wrecking Ball stomps away on Baron... and stomps away some more, despite the protestations of referee Mike Chioda. The savage then drops down and applies a blatant choke, screaming wildly. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" "FIVE!" MELODY Come on, get him off referee! Faqu refuses to let go of the choke and with Blonde and Black out of the way, there's no-one to control him. And with Chioda unable to physically prise Faqu's arm from Baron's throat he gives up and calls for the bell! Even that doesn't stop Faqu though, despite the cheers of the crowd. COLE I think the referee's throwing Faqu out of here Coach! The Samoan Wrecking Ball has lost it, the referee had no alternative but to disqualify Faqu! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Faqu Eliminated by: DQ CUCARACHA INTERNACIONAL 2 TEAM BARON 1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Still Faqu chokes away at Baron though, going completely wild as he does so. It's only when Nathaniel Black finally rolls back into the ring and calls him off that Faqu lets the choke go. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Black reasons as best possible with the Samoan to leave before he gets anyone else DQed. COLE So Faqu is out of here. But the damage might have been done already. COACH It's definately been done Michael. Faqu may be gone, but so has the life, right out of Baron Windels' body. As Black coaxes Faqu out of the ring, James Blonde shakes off the cobwebs. Seeing Baron down and out he quickly picks the Texan back up. Baron has no defence for the cobra clutch... or the legsweep, dropped with ILLEGALLY BLONDE! Blonde frantically calls the referee away from trying to control Faqu to make the count... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING* "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE The damage was done. And James Blonde picking up the scraps for Cucaracha Internacional! As the three comes down, Blonde literally leaps off of Baron and buries his head in his hands in a gushing victory celebration. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winners of the match and SOLE SURVIVORS... representing Cucaracha Internacional... NATHANIEL BLACK and JJAAAAAMMMMEEEEEEESSSS... BBLLLLLLOOOOOOOONNDDEEEEEEE!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Baron Windels Eliminated by: James Blonde SURVIVORS: NATHANIEL BLACK and JAMES BLONDE ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Blonde continues his OTT celebrations as Black glances back, sees what's going on and decides to follow Faqu to the back. Not daunted by being the only one celebrated Blonde points out his departed partners and shouts "WE DID IT!" to them, to which Nathaniel just gives a half-hearted thumbs up. Blonde's ridiculous celebrations earn boos from the crowd as he exits the ring and goes jogging after Black and Faqu, pumping his fists in the air. COLE Anyone would think Blonde just won the World Title! He pinned Baron after Faqu all but choked the life out of him and now he's on the verge of tears, what a goof! COACH Are you kidding? He's back in the good books! Screw the World Title! Just about catching up Blonde jumps onto Black's back as they disappear through the curtains. In the ring, Baron is checked on by Melody. COLE A gallant effort from Baron Windels here tonight. COACH Gallant efforts don't win you your quarters back at the arcade though. Hey, Melody, I got two words for ya... GAME OVER! HAHAHA! Fade in on a picture of Tha Puerto Rican as a child. “Famous” by Puddle Of Mudd begins playing. NARRATOR He was a boy with a dream. Cut to Tha Puerto Rican raising the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt into the air with his right hand while he “smells the electricity” as a single spotlight shines down on him ala The Rock. NARRATOR Now he is a man living out his destiny! #YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!# Cut to a montage of PRL clips throughout his career. NARRATOR Get the whole story on one of the One And Only AngleSault Thread’s brightest stars. It’s The Dream Realized: Tha Puerto Rican Story, the newest DVD release from OAOAST Home Video! NARRATOR Witness the journey of Tha Puerto Rican. From his childhood spent in San Juan, Puerto Rico… Cut to home movies of Tha Puerto Rican as a child. NARRATOR …to his World Heavyweight Championship victory at OAOAST AngleMania VII… Cut to Tha Puerto Rican pinning Stephen Joseph Popick at OAOAST AngleMania VII on March 30, 2008. NARRATOR …and all the points in between! Cut to more highlights of Tha Puerto Rican’s career. NARRATOR Included in this 3 disc retrospect of Tha Puerto Rican’s 10 year career: 15 of Tha Puerto Rican’s greatest matches: the Hell In A Cell Match against Bohemoth at OAOAST School’s Out 2007, the Ladder Match against Leon Rodez at OAOAST AngleMania V, the No Holds Barred Match against Cuban Wall at OAOAST The Great Angle Bash 2008, the 60-Minute Iron Man Match against Brickston at OAOAST AngleSlam 2008, the Career vs. Title Match against The Mad Cappa at OAOAST AngleMania III, the Empty Arena Match against Colombian Heat at OAOAST School’s Out: Class Dismissed, the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship Match against Stephen Joseph Popick at OAOAST AngleMania VII and much more! Exclusive interviews with Tha Puerto Rican, his best friends and his greatest foes. (Colombian Heat, Stephen Joseph Popick, Mrs. Lindsay Gonzalez-Popick, Zack Malibu, Landon “La Cucaracha” Maddix, Leon Rodez and “Shooter” Jay Darring are all shown in quick one second shots) 10 of Tha Puerto Rican’s best promos handpicked by Tha Puerto Rican himself! Tha Puerto Rican’s complete entrance video! A Day In The Life Of Tha Puerto Rican Tha Puerto Rican Returns Home To San Juan, Puerto Rico Tha Puerto Rican’s Journey To The World Title Video Package Tha Puerto Rican Says…: in which Tha Puerto Rican shoots on whatever or whoever we ask him about! And much more! Cut to another PRL career montage. NARRATOR Know your role, jabroni! And get to know The Most Electrifying Man In Professional Wrestling a little bit better with The Dream Realized: Tha Puerto Rican Story! Available now at OAOASTShopZone.com and wherever videos and DVDs are sold! Buy it now! Cut to another picture of Tha Puerto Rican as a child. NARRATOR Tha Puerto Rican: One boy’s dream… Cut to Tha Puerto Rican raising the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship in the air with his left hand while confetti falls into the ring and fireworks explode over the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum from OAOAST AngleMania VII on March 30, 2008. NARRATOR …One man’s destiny. ORDER NOW! The commercial ends. “Famous” by Puddle Of Mudd ends. Cut to Sofa Central. COLE That’s right, fans. The Dream Realized: Tha Puerto Rican Story is on sale RIGHT NOW wherever DVDs are sold! And how appropriate that it comes out now, when tonight we might see the END of Tha Puerto Rican’s first OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship reign! COACH It couldn’t happen soon enough! COLE You say that now, but later on, you will be heading for the hills when he comes out! COACH Why must you bring attention to that!? COLE Like I can hide it!? COACH COLE Anyway, fans, so much hype, so much anticipation for the main event! The OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion Tha Puerto Rican defends his much sought after Title against the #1 Contender Leon Rodez! Fans everywhere are divided on just who will come out the victor and the World Champion! In fact, we asked you on OAOAST.com just who would win the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship Match at November Reign, and this is what you voted through the site and through text messages. The OAOAST November Reign 2008 logo flashes across the screen. Cut to the poll results. The old school WWF Survivor Series theme song plays in the background. Who Will Be The OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion After November Reign? Tha Puerto Rican --------------------------[50.00%] Leon Rodez --------------------------[50.00%] COLE Wow! A tie! 50% think Tha Puerto Rican will win. 50% think Leon Rodez will win! It looks like our fan base is fiercely divided on this issue! COACH What do they know? COLE You hate both men. COACH Exactly. What do they know? Both guys blow! COLE They’re the competitors in our main event, Coach. COACH So? Doesn’t mean I have to LIKE it! If I had my way, the main event would be Theodore Moneymaker vs. Mr. Dick for the “Coolest Guy In The World” Heavyweight Championship! COLE You would seriously want two of your favourites to duke it out? COACH …Wait…hold on…uh…um…err… COLE While Coach tries to find some way to get out of that little awkward moment, let’s head down to the ring for our next match-up! The OAOAST Intercontinental Championship in on the line in a Triple Threat Match! The OAOAST Intercontinental Champion Jereme Grey takes on Colin Maguire Jr. and Austin “Ragdoll” Baker! Let’s go to the ring! COACH Wait! I got it! They can both take the dive and it will end in a draw! COLE Just stop. COACH Fine! COLE *Sigh* COACH *DING DING DING*

COLE And Cortez actually going to start the match for his team! *DING DING DING* Cortez and Reject circle the ring, then slowly move in towards each other. However, Cortez has his back to the enemy corner, and Alf steps in and delivers a knee to his back! COLE And Alf with a cheap shot, allowing Cortez to gain the advantage! Reject hammers away on the back of Cortez, then backs him into the ropes and whips him across. Cortez ducks a clothesline, then delivers one of his own! Reject gets to his feet, and takes a big swing, but Cortez ducks, then lifts him in an atomic drop, and drops him crotch-first on the top rope! COACH Oh no! COLE Reject in a precarious position right now! Cortez bounces Reject up and down on the ropes, until he comes back into the ring. He then unloads with a flurry of right hands, followed by a dropkick! Cortez then tags out to Brock Ausstin. COLE And here comes the team captain! Brock grabs Reject in a hammerlock, and lifts him off the mat, then slams him down onto the mat, while maintaining the hold. Brock drives a couple knees in, then tags Quentin Benjamin, who stomps away at the arm, then drops a knee onto it. Quentin then grabs the arm, and tags in Moss, who drives an elbow into Reject's head. COLE And quick tags by Brock's Flock, as all four guys have already been in the ring! Moss drives some knees in, then tags Benjamin back in, picking up Reject and holding onto his arm, as Benjamin comes off the top with a chop! Benjamin then grabs an arm-wringer, hammering away on the arm, and tags Moss again. COLE Team Heyross now trading off on Reject, one half of the World tag team champions! Reject works his way to his feet, then backs Moss into a corner, and drives some knees into the gut. He then sets up an Irish whip, which Moss reverses, and charges...but Reject moves out of the way! Reject then lifts Moss for an atomic drop, but Moss slips behind the back, and rolls up Reject in a reverse sunset! 1... 2... Kickout! Moss then trips up Reject, and executes a rolling cradle! 1... 2... Kickout! Moss comes at Reject again, but this time gets floored by a clothesline! Reject then tags in Alf. COLE First tag on the DA side, as the team captain in the ring! Alf picks up Moss, and whips him into a corner, and charges...but Moss moves out of the way, and tags in Brock! COLE And now both team captains in there! Brock hammers Alf with right hands, then whips him into the ropes, and executes a BIG backdrop! COACH Oh, no! COLE Alf up in the stars on that one! Brock covers... 1... 2... Kickout! Brock picks up Alf, and executes an OVERHEAD BELLY-TO-BELLY~! He follows it up with a PRESS SLAM~! COLE Brock showing off the power! Brock then tags in Cortez! COLE And this is exactly what Todd Cortez wants! Cortez backs Alf into a corner, and hammers away with right hands, and kicks. He then backs up, and gives Alf a superkick, which sends him bailing to the outside! COACH This one's spilling to the floor! Cortez follows Alf outside, and rams him into the guardrail! He delivers a couple more right hands, then rolls him back inside, where Alf quickly rolls over and tags in TK. Cortez responds by tagging in Brock. COLE And now it's the two power men on each side! TK and Brock circle the ring, and tie up. TK goes to the eyes, then hammers Brock with European uppercuts, and executes a shoulderbreaker! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! TK whips Brock into a corner, and Brock bounces out and floors him with a clothesline! Brock then sets up TK, and lifts him in a hanging vertical suplex, then falls back to the mat! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Brock then whips TK into a corner, and charges, but TK gets his feet up, then tags Reject back in. Reject sizes up Brock, then hits him with a BIG dropkick, but Brock lands right in his corner, where he tags in Moss. Moss and Reject circle the ring, and tie up. Moss backs Reject into the corner, and the referee attempts to separate them, allowing Reject to throw a cheap shot right, but Moss blocks, and delivers rights of his own! He then brings Reject out, and executes a gutwrench suplex! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Moss then grabs a side headlock, but Reject shoves him off into the ropes, then drops down, then gets to his feet, and collides with Moss in mid-ring! COLE Oh, and a collision in the middle of the ring, and both guys down on the mat! Reject and Moss both scoot to their corners, and make tags to TK and Brock, respectively! COLE Tags made on both sides! Brock hammers away on TK, then whips him into the ropes, and catches him with a BIG clothesline! Alf then jumps into the ring, but Brock sees him coming, and floors him with a big right hand! Brock hammers Alf in the corner, but then Reject jumps in and hammers him from behind! COLE This one's starting to get out of control! Cortez comes in the ring and begins to work on TK, while Alf and Reject whip Brock across the ring, but Brock ducks a double clothesline, and delivers one of his own! He then catches Sandman coming in with another clothesline! COLE But Brock fighting off all the odds! Team Heyross comes in and holds off Alf and Reject, while Cortez delivers the CROTCH DROPPAH~! to TK, who staggers right into Brock's waiting arms...for the F-STUNNER-5~!!!!!11111 COLE Brock with the F-Stunner-5~! 1... 2... 3!!! COACH No! COLE And we've got one man down from the Deadly Alliance! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 1st elimination: Thunderkid eliminated by: Brock Ausstin (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Both teams retreat to their corners, as Brock's Flock celebrates. Alf then moves in, and attacks Quentin Benjamin from behind, knocking him to the mat with a double axhandle, then stomping away on him. He then backs him into a corner, and delivers a CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! And another! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Alf then whips Quentin across, but Quentin hops to the middle rope, and fakes Alf out, who drops down to the mat, then Quentin hits him with a slingshot splash! COLE Nice fakeout by Quentin! 1... 2... Kickout! Quentin picks Alf up, but Alf goes to the eyes, then tags in Sandman. COLE And the Heartland champion, in the ring legally for the first time tonight! Sandman delivers forearm blows to Benjamin, then whips him into the corner, where Benjamin slings himself over the charging Sandman, but Sandman is quick to react, and catches Benjamin with a clothesline! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Sandman picks up Benjamin, and scoops him up, but Benjamin slips behind the back, and floors him with a superkick! Benjamin then starts in with right hands. COACH Benjamin needs to make a tag here, in my opinion! Benjamin hooks Sandman, and executes a snap suplex! Benjamin then climbs to the top rope, and waits for Sandman to get to his feet...then goes for a FLYING BODYPRESS, but Sandman drops to the mat, and Benjamin misses! COLE And Benjamin missing the boat there, he really should have made a tag there, as Coach said! Benjamin struggles to his feet, and Sandman grabs him by the head, then hooks his arms...and delivers the ARCHANGEL'S WINGS~!!!!!11111 COLE And there's the Archangel's Wings! COACH That'll do it for Quentin Benjamin! 1... 2... 3!!! COLE Even up again! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 2nd elimination: Quentin Benjamin eliminated by: Sandman9000 (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Moss comes right into the ring, and hammers away on Sandman, then whips him into the ropes, and catches him with a spinebuster! He then backs into the ropes, and drops an elbow! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Moss picks up Sandman, and executes a back suplex, then covers again... 1... 2... Kickout! Moss backs Sandman into the ropes, where he makes a blind tag to Alf. Sandman reverses the Irish whip, then Alf steps in and catches Moss with a AA SPINEBUSTER~! COACH NICE teamwork! COLE Alf with that spinebuster of his, and a cover! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Alf sets up Moss for an Irish whip, but Moss reverses, and Reject blind tags himself in as Alf hits the ropes. COLE Another blind tag by the Deadly Alliance! Moss catches Alf coming off the ropes, and executes a STUN GUN~! COACH Oof! Moss then turns around as Reject springs in...and hits him with the EULOGY~!!!!!11111 COLE Eulogy! COACH Moss is done! 1... 2... 3!!! COACH All right! COLE And just like that, the Deadly Alliance goes from a 4-3 deficit to a 3-2 advantage! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 3rd elimination: Charlie Moss eliminated by: Reject (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Brock steps in and hammers on Reject, but backs into the ropes, and Alf catches him with a knee to the back! Reject then tags Alf back in, and Alf stomps away on Brock, then hits a snap legdrop! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Alf sets up a suplex, but Brock blocks, then blocks again, and executes one of his own! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Brock then tags in Cortez, and holds Alf for him, as Cortez lays in a kick to the midsection! Cortez then backs Alf into the corner, and hammers away on him, then attempts an Irish whip. Alf reverses, and charges, but Cortez gets the feet, up, then floors him with a clothesline! Reject then steps into the ring, and gets caught with a SITOUT SPINEBUSTER~! COLE Reject got caught coming in! However, when Cortez turns around, Alf catches him with a SUPERKICK~! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Shoulder up! COACH And Brock was almost left all by himself there! Alf tags in Sandman, and the two whip Cortez across, and drop him with a double elbow! Sandman covers... 1... 2... Kickout! Sandman sets up Cortez, and starts to hook him for the ARCHANGEL'S WINGS~!!!!!11111...but Cortez is able to escape, and catches Sandman with an STO~! COLE STO, and now Cortez needs to tag! Cortez and Sandman scoots to their corners, and tags are made to Reject and Brock! COLE Tags on both sides! Brock floors Reject with a clothesline, then catches Alf with one as he steps through the ropes! He then catches Reject once again, and fires away with rights on Sandman! COLE Referee needs to get some people out of there! Brock whips Reject into the ropes, and catches him with a BIG backdrop! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Sandman makes the save! Cortez comes in and slugs it out with Sandman in a corner, while Reject waits for Brock, and attempts the EULOGY~!!!!!11111...but Brock, in one motion, slips out into the KATAHAJIME~!!!!!11111 COLE There it is! Brock's submission hold! However, before Brock can drop to the mat, Reject raises his foot up, delivering a LOW BLOW~! COLE And a low blow from Reject! Reject then tags in Alf, who climbs to the top rope, as Sandman shakes free of Cortez, and hits a YAKUZA KICK~! on Brock, as Alf gains his balance on top...and comes down with the FIVE-STAR ALF SPLASH~!!!!!11111 1... 2... 3!!! COACH Haha! COLE And this does not look good for Todd Cortez. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 4th elimination: Brock Ausstin eliminated by: Alfdogg (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE It's now 3-on-1 for Todd Cortez! As Cortez looks across the ring at his odds, Alf tags out to Reject, who moves in on Cortez, and engages in a slugfest. Cortez gains the advantage, but misses a swing, and Reject catches him with a back suplex! Reject then pounds away on Cortez on the mat, before picking him up and whipping him into the ropes. Cortez ducks a clothesline, and hits Reject with the HOLLOW POINT~! COLE Big move from Cortez! Cortez catches Reject getting up with the CROTCH DROPPAH~!, then whips him into the ropes, and executes a spinning wheel kick! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Cortez back into the ropes again, but gets tripped by Sandman! COLE And Sandman from the outside! Sandman then climbs to the apron and gets the tag in, Sandman executes BOOT SCRAPES on Cortez, then drags him over and tags in Reject once again. Reject picks up Cortez, and executes a FISHERMAN'S BUSTER~! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Reject pummels Cortez some more, then grabs him in a standing headscissors. COACH Could be the Pitch Black, Cole, we haven't seen this in a while! However, Cortez blocks on the pick-up, and comes back down, then trips up Reject, and goes to a quick rolling cradle! 1... 2... 3!!! COACH NO! COLE Reject got pinned! He's gone! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 5th elimination: Reject eliminated by: Todd Cortez (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Reject angrily protests the decision, Alf quickly comes in and hammers Cortez with right hands, then backs him into a corner and delivers a CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! And another! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! And another! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Alf then pulls Cortez out, and executes a BELLY-TO-BELLY~! COACH But here we go, this'll do it! Alf follows up with a T-BONE~!!, and covers... 1... 2... Shoulder up! COACH Come on, ref! Alf tags in Sandman, who comes in and chokes Cortez on the mat, then picks him up and whips him into the ropes. Cortez ducks a clothesline, then stops and applies a sleeper! COLE Cortez with a sleeperhold! After a brief struggle, Sandman grabs the head of Cortez and drops to his ass! COLE But a nice jawbreaker to counter! Sandman tags Alf back in once again, and Alf comes in and sets up Cortez on the buckles. He climbs up after him, but Cortez fights back, and a slugfest ensues. Alf gets the better of the exchange, then goes for a superplex, but Cortez blocks, then lifts Alf in a suplex, dropping him back down to the mat! COLE Wow, Alf face-first back down to the mat! Cortez steps back to the top rope, and leaps off, catching Alf with a MISSILE DROPKICK~! COLE Big dropkick! COACH Yeah, but now he's got no one to tag out to! Alf and Cortez slowly get to their feet, and Alf throws a right...but Cortez blocks, and starts delivering rights of his own! COLE And look at Todd Cortez fight! Cortez backs off for a second, groggy, then catches Alf with the URBAN ASSAULT~! COLE The Urban Assault! Could this do it for Alf? 1... 2... NO!!! Sandman makes the save! COLE No, Sandman there to make the save! Sandman sets up Cortez for an Irish whip, but Cortez reverses, then catches Sandman with the momentum and pitches him to the outside! However, Alf catches him with the COBRA CLUTCH FACEBUSTER~!!! COACH This is it! COLE One of Alf's big moves, and the cover... 1... 2... NO!!! Cortez gets the shoulder up! COLE But no! Cortez still fighting! COACH I can't believe this! Alf backs into the ropes, and runs at Cortez...but Cortez catches him in a chokehold! COLE Cortez going for it again! However, Alf delivers a kick to the gut, then sets Cortez up for the SHARPSHOOTER~!!!!!11111 COLE And now the Sharpshooter, Alf trying to get it on! Cortez reaches up and delivers a shot to the face, then rolls backwards up to his feet, and runs at Alf, hopping onto his head...and, in one motion, drilling him with the RIOT ACT PLUS~!!!!!11111 COACH You've got to be kidding me! COLE Unbelieveable! Cortez hitting the Riot Act Plus! Cover... 1... 2... 3!!! COACH Damn it! COLE And it's one-on-one! I can't believe it! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 6th elimination: Alfdogg eliminated by: Todd Cortez (pinfall) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE Landon said his guys need to start producing, what about Todd Cortez? Pinfalls over Reject and Alfdogg in one night, now, can he give Sandman his first defeat in approximately five years? Sandman crawls into the ring, as Cortez waits on him, then hops onto his head, and flips over...but the referee is in the wrong place at the wrong time, and gets taken out by the move! COACH And now the referee may be eliminated! COLE Sandman fortunate right there, the referee inadvertently blocking the Riot Act Plus from Cortez! As Cortez slowly gets to his feet, Alf slides back inside with the ring bell, and clobbers Cortez over the head with it! COLE No! Damn it! COACH Cortez just got his bell rung! COLE Wow, I've never heard that one before! Very clever! COACH Thank you! COLE Alf should be back in the locker room right now, he's been eliminated! COACH He is! Look, he's leaving! Sandman slowly gets to his feet, as Cortez is out of it, and revives the referee, then picks up Cortez, and executes the ARCHANGEL'S WINGS~!!!!!11111 Cover... 1... 2... 3!!! COLE Damn it! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 7th elimination: Todd Cortez eliminated by: Sandman9000 (pinfall) SOLE SURVIVOR: Sandman9000 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ *DING DING DING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen...the SOLE SURVIVOR representing the Deadly Alliance...SSSSSSSSSSSSANDMANNNNNNNNNNN NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEE THHHHHHHHHOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND!!!!! COLE The Deadly Alliance has STOLE this match thanks to Alf, who was already eliminated! Alf returns to the ring area, with Mr. Dick joining him, and meets Sandman, and the three celebrate in the aisle. COACH And for the second year in a row, Sandman9000 the sole survivor for his team, and ironically, the last man he pinned last year was Alfdogg! COLE But what an effort by Todd Cortez, facing 3-on-1 odds, and almost pulled off the stunner! One has to wonder what would have happened had Alf not interfered in this match at the end! You can bet, he'll be back, and he'll have a lot to say about this night and about the Deadly Alliance!

THE NEW OAOAOST IPHONE LOADED WITH OAOAST THEMES. GAMES. UPDATED HIGHLIGHTS FREE FOR SIX MONTHS. AND PICTURES OF REJECT NAKED IN THE SHOWER. AVAILABLE NOW! COLE And we're set for a big-time elimination match! Let's go up to Michael Buffer! BUFFER Ladies and Gentlemen...please direct your attention to the interview stage, and welcome a special guest for this match...DAVID CASTAGNA! The lights go out, and a spotlight flashes on Castagna on his keyboard. A laser show of sorts goes on throughout the arena as the song plays, like you may see at an old-school rock concert. The crowd applauds, as Castagna rises and bows, then departs the stage. Soon after, The Wall by Kansas plays, and the Deadly Alliance make their way through the curtains. COLE What a performance by David Castagna on the keyboards, and now we're about to see another great performance by eight men in this ring! Back up to Michael Buffer! BUFFER The following contest is a four-on-four elimination match! Making their way to the ring, being accompanied by Melissa Nerdly...introducing first, the OAOAST World tag team champions...THUNDERKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID and RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEJECT!!!!! also, the OAOAST Heartland champion...SSSSSSSSSSSSANDMANNNNNNNNNNN NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEE THHHHHHHHHOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND!!!!! and the team captain...the OAOAST United States champion...ALFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGG!!!!! Collectively, they are the DEADLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAA AAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNCCCCCCCCCCCCCCE!!!!! COLE A big week for the Deadly Alliance, as just three days ago, they revealed Mr. Dick as the much-anticipated fifth member of their stable! COACH And what an addition that is, an up-and-coming star joining four already top-level talents in the Deadly Alliance! COLE And tonight, the tables will be turned on them, as we still don't know one of their opponents! The DA enters the ring and goes through their extra-curriculars, then talk strategy, as a cold, dark voice begins to speak the ungodly hymn over the loud speakers, as smoke begins to cover the entrance way. "Come on God, Answer Me. For Years, I've Been Asking You Why? Why are the Innocent Dead and the Guilty Alive? Where is Justice? Where is Punishment? . . . . . . . . . . . Or Have You Already Answered? Have You Already Said to the World, Here is Justice. Here is Punishment. Here.... In Me." Punishment by BIOHAZARD hits, and Brock Ausstin comes through the curtains, followed by Team Heyross. COLE Well, we knew these guys were in the match, let's get their introductions from Michael Buffer! BUFFER Their opponents, are BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROCK'S FLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOCK!!!!! ...first, CHARLIE MOSS and QUENTIN BENJAMIN...TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRRRRRRRRROSSSSSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! introducing the team captain..."THE CURRENT BIG THING", BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROCK AUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSTINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!! Brock hops onto the apron, and jerks back on the ropes, causing pyro to explode from all four corners. Team Heyross then enters the ring, and poses on the buckles. COACH Well, we're about to find out, Cole! Buffer readies himself as the music dies down. BUFFER And their mystery partner... A brief silence, then Oh No by Mos Def, Nate Dogg and Pharoahe Monch plays, and the crowd comes to its feet as Todd Cortez bursts through the curtains. COACH Hey, wait a minute! COLE Todd Cortez the fourth man! And you can bet, he's got revenge on his mind! BUFFER From Hollywood Boulevard, representing Cucaracha Internacional..."URBAN LEGEND" TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODD COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!! Cortez slides into the ring, and points the finger at Alf, then spits at him, as the rest of the DA holds back Alf. COACH What must Landon be thinking right now? The referees get everyone calmed down, then teammates step out, and Cortez sets up to start with Reject.

"SOPHIE!! GET ME JEREME!!" -A door in the back hallway of the arena opens quickly. It zooms out to show Jereme Grey - causing the fans to erupt in cheers - leaning against the wall next to the doorway, where his sister, Sophie, now stands. SOPHIE ...Josie vous veut dans son bureau. JEREME Ouais. J'ai obtenu cel. -Jereme slides into the office, shoving his hair out of his face. The room is very dark, and only a desk lamp lights up the room. Sitting at her desk - no need for an introduction - JOSIE BAKER!~! The fans are mixed as she smirks slightly at Jereme, who sits down across from her. Josie looks over at Sophie and motions for the lamp standing next to her. Sophie hurries to it and flips the switch. Leaning against the wall, standing behind Josie... RAGDOLL!! JEREME JESUS CHRIST!! QUE LA BAISE!? -The fans erupt as Ragdoll chuckles. RAGDOLL ...Hi... JEREME You threatened my sister with a knife, you psychotic fuck!! RAGDOLL And I've apologized for that. JEREME I'm going to fucking - JOSIE Kill him? -Jereme stops and looks at his cousin. JOSIE You also want to get your hands on CMJ, don't you? -Jereme sits still for a second, before nodding slightly and leaning back. Ragdoll smacks his lips and pulls out a cigarette, before going through the lighting motions, just before Josie reaches her arm back and grabs the cigarette, before putting it in her mouth and smoking it. JOSIE ...What percent would you say you're at? JEREME What? JOSIE 50%? 75? 100? JEREME ...Um...I guess 100. -Josie smirks, just before leaning forward. JOSIE Then tonight...you get your chance to get CMJ. Tonight...it will be you, Jereme Grey, defending your title which was so rudely stolen...against the man who stole it...Colin Maguire, Jr. -The fans erupt as Jereme nods, smiling wide. JOSIE ...and Ragdoll. -The cheers grow even louder as Jereme's jaw drops. Ragdoll smiles wide and shrugs. JOSIE Now...i'm busy, so...both of you...get out. -Jereme sits, staring daggers at his cousin as Ragdoll skips past him. Josie stares right back at Jereme. The two don't break their gaze at all. JOSIE ...Look, Jer...you can have one of two things...you can have a staring match with me, or you can have an Intercontinental Championship match later tonight against the man that stole YOUR title, the man that has constantly called you a fluke and a cheap champion......and Ragdoll. Which is it gonna be? -Jereme continues to stare, then looks down. He stands slowly and walks out. Josie shakes her head and looks back down at her paperwork. Cut to... COLE Up next here at November Reign it's the California Street Fight, the biggest test of the young career of Women's Champion Jade Rodez-Duncan. The OAOAST's Prodigal Daughter has had a lengthy rivalry with Malaysia Nerdly ever since Malaysia showed up in the OAOAST. And it was an emotional victory when Jade finally took the Women's Title from Malaysia at AngleSlam. But that was just the start for Malaysia. As we return to the arena, the ominous sound of a whip cracking kicks "Wildside" by Motley Crue into gear. With a sinister smile on her face Malaysia Nerdly makes her way out, carrying her trusty cat o'nine tails in her hand. Malaysia, deep in thought, licks her lips. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is the California Street Fight, scheduled for one fall with No Disqualifications and No Countouts, for the OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing at this time, the challenger. Hailing from Edmonton, Alberta Canada. She is a former Women's Champion and The Ultimate Combination Of Beauty And Beatdowns... MMMMAAALLLLLLAAAAAYYYYYSSSSIIIIIIAAAAAAAA... NNEEEERRRRRRRRRDDLLLLLYYYYYYY!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Malaysia climbs the steps, staring at the hostile California crowd booing her. She cracks her whip against the steel steps and gives them a glare before entering the ring. COLE Our spies inform us that Malaysia Nerdly was in the arena early this morning and was seen routing around ringside, placing items underneath the ring. So, those 'toys' as she so disturbingly refers to them that she used on sister Maggie last Thursday, we can only assume, are ready and waiting for Jade tonight. COACH Any update on Maggie? COLE Well, she was shaken up but is now fine. Not the first time she's dealt with Malaysia in her life. COACH Okay. Any update on that corndog I ordered about five minutes ago? "Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy) And you don’t care what they say See, every time you turn around They screamin' your name Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy) And you don’t care what they say See, every time you turn around They screamin' your name" The lights flash purple and often as "When I Grow Up" by The Pussycat Dolls hits, to a BIG reaction from the home state crowd. Bouncing through the entrance way comes California's very own Little Miss, Jade Rodez-Duncan, pulling the Women's Title from around her waist and raising it over her head. Jade looks into the ring mid-lift though and what's meant to be a triumphant gesture is ruined by the look of fear on her face. Taking a deep breath, Jade lowers the belt and makes the long walk to meet her fate. BUFFER And her opponent! She now resides in Los Angeles, CALIFORNIA... she is the second generation starlet with a heart of gold... ladies and gentlemen, here is the defending OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION... "LITTLE MISS CALIFORNIA"... JJJJAAAAAAADDEEEEEE... RRRRROOOOODDEEEEEEZZZZZZ - DDUUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAANN!!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Jade hesitates on entering the ring, stood on the outside looking up at Malaysia. "When I grow up I wanna be famous I wanna be a star I wanna be in movies When I grow up I wanna see the world Drive nice cars I wanna have Groupies" COLE Jade has the homefield advantage, but it's clear to see Malaysia has the fear factor on her side. The Women's Champion has to try and draw a little courage from these fans, but then again that's easy for me to say sitting here. Having set her title belt aside Jade takes another deep breath before going to enter the ring. She thinks better of it halfway in though, scooting back outside. Malaysia can wait no longer and goes out after her indecisive opponent, but Jade is able to pass her and get into the ring. Malaysia just holds her hands on her hips and smiles. COACH Somebody tell Jade about the fun of the chase, wouldya? She's just making the moment she gets caught all the sweeter for Malaysia. COLE The longer Jade can stay away, the longer she stays in one piece. Still smiling, Malaysia reaches up and pulls herself onto the apron... ...but the smile disappears as she's flung to the arena floor by a dropkick from Jade! *DINGDINGDING!* COLE Alright, Jade taking the fight to Malaysia from the get-go! COACH Yeah, that's just gonna make it all sweeter too. Malaysia's kinky like that. Jade slides out of the ring and follows after Malaysia, nailing her with a forearm as she picks herself up. A second forearm staggers Malaysia around the ring. As does a third. The California crowd route Jade on she continues to take the fight to Malaysia, jumping up on her back and landing short shots to the back of the head. Malaysia carries Jade and absorbs the shots, until she manages to ram Jade's lower back into the ring apron. COLE Ooh! Getting the (proverbial) monkey off her back, Malaysia's smile widens as she realises the fun starts here. Balling up her fist, she wheels around... to find Jade's ankles disappearing underneath the ring skirt. Malaysia misses grabbing onto it and slaps the apron in frustration. COACH A little hide and seek, that's always good for building a little excitement. MALAYSIA #Jaaade#... come out and #plaaaayyy# Malaysia goes around the ringpost as Jade begins to crawl out the other side. She reaches out, grabbing onto Jade's hair and pulls her up. It's only then that Malaysia notices the KENDO STICK in Jade's hands. *THWACK!* "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" A shot to the thigh rocks Malaysia! *THWACK!* "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" Another shot to the back of the leg and Malaysia drops to one knee. Jade lets out a roar as she swings one final time... *THWACK!* "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" ...and catches Malaysia in the shoulder! COLE Wow! We've NEVER seen this kind of intensity from Jade and she's found it just at the right time. Jade HAS to go to these lengths if she's going to survive tonight as Women's Champion. COACH But by doing so, she's playing right into Malaysia's hands. Malaysia uses the announce table to pick herself up as Jade dumps the kendo stick. A quick jab catches Malaysia in the face, before Jade throws her challenger face-first into the ring apron. Malaysia is shoved back inside and Jade follows, going for a cover... 1... Quick kickout. COACH Nah, not even close. Jade stays on Malaysia and lands a couple of kicks, before attempting an irish whip. Hooking her arm around the top rope, Malaysia refuses to go though. Jade tries a couple more times to no avail. As Malaysia breaks the hands apart, Jade then starts to run, but Malaysia snatches hold of her hair and stops her! Suddenly the smile has gone and Malaysia doesn't look like she's after fun as she twists on the hair, dragging Jade around to face her. Jade realises she's in a tight spot, but escapes by stomping on Malaysia's foot! Jade then throws a front dropkick, sending Malaysia tumbling backwards through the ring ropes. COACH There's playing hard to get and then there's just frustrating. COLE Believe it or not, Jade's not here to be Malaysia's plaything. COACH That's not what Malaysia reckons. And seeing what Malaysia does to people, I'm inclined to agree with anything she says. Saving herself the challenger pulls herself up on the apron. Jade comes swinging with another right hand, but Malaysia blocks. Grabbing both of Jade's wrists, Malaysia throws herself backwards off the apron, clotheslining Jade across the top ring rope! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Malaysia lands on her feet and stares at Jade as she kicks her feet in pain. COLE This match may just have taken a sinister turn. Climbing back into the ring, Malaysia pulls Jade up off the canvas, slowly. Malaysia sizes Jade up with her fists cocked, ready to strike... but then she just lets go and allows Jade to fall to the canvas. COACH What's the deal? COLE Malaysia just letting Jade go. Don't tell me she's showing compassion? With Jade still trying to catch her breath back Malaysia surprises everybody by leaving the ring. But anyone expecting compassion is dumb as rocks... sorry Michael... as Malaysia's smile creeps back upon pulling up the ring skirt. Malaysia routes around for a few seconds, then slides a trash can lid into the ring. She then goes back under and re-emerges, eyes transfixed on her newest find. COACH Woah. COLE What is that!? Is that a riding crop!? Coach, that's a riding crop, what in the hell is Malaysia doing with that!? COACH Do you want me to draw you a diagram? Cause it'd probably easier to search for 'riding crop' on this laptop on our desk and just show you the results. Malaysia slaps the weapon against the ring apron and runs her hand across it before sliding into the ring. Unbeknownest to Jade, as she pulls herself up across the ring. Stalking towards her, Malaysia places the riding crop down into her ring attire before grabbing Jade by the hair, throwing her head into the top turnbuckle pad. And again. Malaysia then pulls Jade back, forearming her in the back of the head. Down goes Jade, left in a precarious position as Malaysia removes the riding crop again. Malaysia flicks Jade's cheerleader skirt up (WOOO!)... *THWACK!* "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" ...AND CRACKS THE CROP ACROSS HER BACKSIDE! COACH Ooh-hoo-hoo! COLE Coach, that's what jockeys use to whip horses during races. This is vicious... sadistic even! With Jade's face etched in pain she clings onto the bottom rope, hoping not to be hit again. Placing the riding crop between her teeth Malaysia drags Jade off the rope. She wields the crop again with sheer excitement in her eyes... but Jade fends her off with a thrust kick out of sheer desperation. "YYEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!" As Malaysia drops the crop, Jade lays in with a forearm strike. A second. And a third. Walking a little gingerly, Jade comes off the ropes with a fourth forearm to get more momentum, rocking Malaysia a little. Malaysia shakes it off and grabs at Jade, but she evades. Staying elusive, Jade evades again. JRD then runs to the turnbuckles and pushes herself up, placing herself on Malaysia's shoulders. Malaysia carries Jade away from the corner, but she takes a right hand to the top of the head. And another, allowing Jade to rock forward with a Victory Roll... 1... 2... No! COLE I think that crack of the whip woke Jade up Coach, she's starting to build a little momentum, keeping Malaysia on her toes! Weaving underneath Malaysia's arm, Jade kicks her in the back of the knee. The Women's Champ then hits the ropes and delivers a Bulldog. Cover... 1... 2... No! With her challenger reeling, Jade quickly grabs the trash can lid. The Californias encourage her to use it and after a little hesitation, she goes to... and gets cut off, empthatically, with a Yakuza kick to the chest! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!" As Jade picks herself up, Malaysia knocks her down with a second hard boot just for good measure. COLE It was the speed and elusiveness that helped Jade to victory at AngleSlam and we're seeing why. Once Malaysia catches you and slows the pace down, she just meticulously picks her opponents apart. COACH And enjoys it. Gotta love that. COLE Not particularly. With Jade hurt, Malaysia reaches down into her ring attire again... ...producing a PAIR OF HANDCUFFS!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh no. This is bad. Real bad. COACH I guess Jade was being a little too fiesty for Malaysia's liking. Malaysia dangles the handcuffs in front of Jade's face, waiting for her to make a grab from them before snatching them away. Malaysia then LASHES Jade across the back of the head with them! With Jade face down, Malaysia grabs her in a hammerlock, clamping the cuff around the wrist. Before she can get the other cuff on though, Jade somehow pulls off a legsweep to pull the rug from under Malaysia's feet. Both champion and challenger scramble to their feet, with Jade going behind looking for a schoolgirl... but Malaysia blocks... and locks the other cuff around her OWN wrist! COACH Oh, even better! Not realising they're joined at the wrists, Jade lets Malaysia go and tries to run into the ropes. She gets jerked right back though... and nailed right in the mouth with Malaysia's powerful forearm! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE And Jade has nowhere to go, nowhere to run. She is trapped within Malaysia's clutches. Malaysia uses her free hand to grab Jade's hair, pulling her to her feet. Stuck at close range, Jade is rocked with a HEADBUTT. She staggers backwards, until the cuffs kick in, keeping her on her feet for a boot from Malaysia. Jade falls to her knees as Malaysia positions herself behind Jade and forces her to choke herself with her own handcuffed arm! "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" COACH These people can chant all they want, there's nowhere for Jade to go! As Jade's face starts to redden, Malaysia grins knowing she doesn't have a five count to answer to. Jade uses her free left arm to elbow Malaysia in the hip but doesn't come close to breaking the choke. COLE If Jade passes out, we've got a new Women's Champion. COACH If Jade passes out, I wanna be here to see what happens next! The Anaheim crowd continue to will their homestate hero's daughter on to escape, but Jade is starting to fade away. Curiously, Malaysia chooses this point to let Jade go. Jade flops onto her face, only her cuffed right arm hanging off the canvas. Malaysia starts to pick Jade up again, dragging her over to a corner. Slowly Malaysia exits the ring and backs down the ring steps, forcing Jade to come with her. Unfortunately the ringpost gets in the way and as Malaysia keeps on backing up, Jade's shoulder is forced against the steel and forced to the point of being ripped out of the socket!! Howls of pain escape Jade before she finally manouevers herself away from the post, which doesn't really do her much good as her face hits the ring apron before her body crashes to the arena floor, dragging Malaysia to her feet. COLE Malaysia's going underneath the ring again. What on earth is under there we can only guess. Well, it's a wrestling show, which explains why Malaysia returns from under the ring with a TABLE! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" COACH Why are these people cheering? That table's gonna be Jade's crashmat in a few minutes you know. COLE Yeah but it's a wrestling show. Give them a break. Malaysia puts the table back in, as best a woman who's handcuffed to another woman by one wrist can. Malaysia then goes underneath the ring again. Clearly knowing where to look and what she's looking for, her eyes soonlight up. And a worried murmur goes through the crowd as they see what Malaysia has in her hand. COACH COLE That's a CATTLE PROD! Oh my God! I realise this is No Disqualifications, but this is going COMPLETELY over the line! "YOU'RE FUCKED UP!" "YOU'RE FUCKED UP!" "YOU'RE FUCKED UP!" "YOU'RE FUCKED UP!" The sickest of all sick looks appears on Malaysia's face, clearly a fan of objects with electrical currents. No homo. Malaysia eyes up the cattle prod with what can be best decribed as lust. But with her eyes taken elsewhere, Malaysia doesn't notice Jade getting to one knee. And with one last, desperate burst of energy, Jade plows forward... JADE RRRRAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!! *CRASH!* ...AND SPEARS MALAYSIA BACKWARDS INTO THE STEEL RING STEPS!!!!!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Jade might have just saved her life with that charge! Striking the back of her head against the steel, Malaysia looks to be knocked silly. Jade starts to crawl away, but is unable to get from within arm's reach. "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" Suddenly, up goes a cheer for another California hero, ALIX MARIA SPEZIA!!!! COACH Now what the hell is she doing out here!? Alix jogs to ringside and rushes right to the aid of a fan who's desperate for her autograph. To be fair, she doesn't waste time personalising the message or asking for any money. Once that's out of the way Alix dives to Jade's aid. Grabbing the handcuffs, Alix reaches into her hair and produces a hairpin. JADE Wha... what are you... ALIX Hey there sleepyhead! Trust me sweetie, I'll have you out of this fix in a jiffy-pop. When you're forgetful as silly ol' me, you either grab a dictionary and pray you stumble on your safeword quickly or ya learn how to pick the locks on handcuffs. And sure enough, Alix works her magic and unlocks the handcuffs! ALIX Bye ya'll!! "YYYYYAAAAAAAYYYYYYY!!" COLE Well, that got us out of that seemingly unescapable situation quite nicely. Alix disappears as quickly as she enters, leaving the match to continue as Jade rolls into the ring. However, Malaysia is quick to recover as well. She throws the handcuffs away angrily, re-entering the ring and closing the gap on Jade. But Jade is loose now and turns around, pawing the challenger with an open left hand. She then paws her with an open right. With a guttural shout, Jade then pulls a 360 and knocks Malaysia down with a big clothesline! COLE Exclusive: Rich Little Blonde Girl Kicks Ass! Jade showing a little of that Duncan fire! Grabbing the trash can lid, Jade wastes no time this time... *CLANG!* "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" ...and nails Malaysia over the head with it! COLE Cover Jade, cover! With all of California encouraging her, Jade does just that... 1... 2... NO! COLE Only two. COACH Yeah, what a crying shame that is, eh Michael. You're supposed to be impartial, jackass! COLE You aren't. COACH Exactly! You hold it together while I point out how Jade's an embarrassment to the Duncan heritage, that's how this thing works between us. Malaysia is already picking herself up, much to Jade's surprise. Well, not so much surprise as nerves. Jade dumps the lid and hits the ropes, catching Malaysia on the way up with a crossbody... but Malaysia catches her in her arms! A groan fills the arena, as Malaysia then dumps Little Miss California with the Fallaway Slam! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" With a scowl Malaysia pulls Jade back up and onto her shoulders. Positioning in the centre of the ring, she DRIVES her down with a Powerbomb and stacks Jade on her shoulders for the pin... 1... 2... KICKOUT!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COLE First nearfall of the match for Malaysia, who isn't having quite so much fun as she thought she would tonight. COACH That might be about to change. Marching across the ring, Malaysia grabs and starts to set up the table. Placing it near one corner of the ring Malaysia rubs the surface of the table with one hand, her body with the other, before going to retrieve Jade. What fight the Women's Champ had built is gone now and she takes a forearm to the face. Malaysia then pulls Jade's head down and applies a gutwrench. Another worried murmur goes up as the crowd know what's coming, even before Malaysia muscles Jade up over her shoulder, into the Canadian Backbreaker. COLE Oh no, here comes that Piledriver! Jade kicks and struggles as Malaysia begins to walk towards the table... and it pays off, as she escapes Malaysia's clutches and lands on her feet. Realising where she is, Jade grabs a hold of Malaysia's head as she's off-balance, pulling her down with the patented Duncan reverse x-factor!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE GOT IT FROM MY MOMMA! 1... 2... KICKOUT!!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Wow! Nobody kicked out of that move... COACH When Krista did it. Keyword, Krista! Everything Krista touches turns to gold, everything Jade touches turns and takes a giant leap off a cliff committing suicide rather than hang around to experience the pain of extreme failure! Jade looks shocked at not getting the three and doubt starts to creep in as she wonders what she can possibly do to beat Malaysia now. The challenger picks herself up with the table's help, so Jade grabs her in a cobra clutch... but gets an elbow in the gut. Malaysia then grabs Jade and bounces her head off the tabl... NO! Jade blocks and bounces Malaysia's head instead! "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" The crowd get behind Little Miss California, as she drags Malaysia around the table and places her against the turnbuckle. Jade climbs the turnbuckles and starts raining down right hands. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" "FIVE!" "SI..." NO! To the crowd's horror Malaysia picks Jade up off the ring ropes, readying her for a Powerbomb... ...but instead throws her backwards, stomach first across the top rope! COLE It looked like Malaysia was about to drive Jade through that table but for some reason, she didn't do it. With Jade hung up, Malaysia steps back and climbs onto the middle turnbuckle. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH All good things come to those who wait. COLE Oh boy. Getting her footing, Malaysia drives her elbow into Jade's kidneys as she lays on the rope beside her. Two more elbows land, before Malaysia starts to drag Jade so she's positioned on the turnbuckles as well. Malaysia then starts to try and manoeuver Jade into a canadian backbreaker position while sat on the top turnbuckle. COLE Oh no. Jade's got to get out of this, Malaysia's going to drive her headfirst through this table! COACH Well DUH! Just as Malaysia starts to stand up though, Jade manages to turn to the side and land a shot to the head! And another! And another! Malaysia sits back down and Jade is able to turn around, looking very unsteady on the top turnbuckle. Reaching up, Malaysia clubs her forearm across the side of the head and tries to grab Jade again. The Women's Champion is running out of options. And desperate times call for desperate measures, as she suddenly BITES MALAYSIA'S FOREHEAD!!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Now where did she learn THAT from!? Once the initial pain has worn off and Jade's teeth have let up on her flesh, Malaysia actually ENJOYS it and asks for more. But Jade has other ideas. Reaching back, Jade pulls off her boot... *THUD!* ...AND SMACKS MALAYSIA ACROSS THE BACK OF THE HEAD WITH THE SOLE!! The boot falls to the arena floor as Jade wobbles on the verge of following it. But she regains her balance. Jade then looks up at the heavens and crosses her heart, hoping not to die as she places herself on the top rope. Malaysia is still dazed, allowing Jade to hook her in a side headlock. Once she's steady, Jade then takes off... *KE-RAAASSSH!!* "YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" ...AND PUTS MALAYSIA THROUGH THE TABLE WITH A BULLDOG FROM THE TURNBUCKLES!!! COLE OH, MY!! The Anaheim crowd go WILD, as Jade manages to clear the table and lands on the comparatively safe canvas. Malaysia however lays flat out in the middle of the splintered table. "JADE!" "JADE!" "JADE!" "JADE!" Grimacing, Jade holds her hip as she drags herself back towards the table. She rolls Malaysia over and drops on top... 1... 2... 3!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" *DINGDINGDING!* COLE Can you believe it!? COACH I sure as hell can't! Wild celebrations start in the stands as Jade rolls off of Malaysia with her hand raised in victory. Clearly still in pain, Jade needs the referee's help to get to her feet but forces a smile nonetheless. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the match... and STILL OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION... JJJJAAAAAADDEEEEEE... RRROOOOOOODDEEEEEZZZZZZ... DDUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAAANN!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE With the pressure on and the odds against her, despite fear and trepidation, despite being physically out-matched, Jade Rodez-Duncan BEATS Malaysia and is STILL the Women's Champion! How can you possibly doubt this courageous young woman in the face of this!? Handed her title belt, Jade can barely hide her surprise but raises it over her head like the Champion she is. Malaysia is still hurting amongst the broken table and checked on by the referee as Jade just about pulls herself up the turnbuckle with genuine thanks for the support of the crowd. COLE The critics have been answered tonight at November Reign. This was no fluke! No Disqualifications, No Countouts, Jade still pulled it out. COACH Even I've gotta cop to this one. I didn't think she stood a chance in hell and maybe without Alix getting involved she wouldn't have done. But... *ungh*... like or not, she won, I guess. COLE Damn right she did! Jade climbs down from the turnbuckles and exits the ring carefully, to high-five some of the Anaheim fans. Limping up the aisle, she turns back to raise the Women's Title one more time, before limping off to get some attention for her injuries no doubt.

lol only you, me and alf have turned anything in so far! And KC is all done with the match graphics. I really wanna get it up Monday night no homo. But, Tuesday is as late as I'm willing to go 3 matches or not. The important question my butterflies is should the show's name now be changed to December Reign? Or do we dare defy space and time continuium?

smooth

That's cuz universeal music wanted to be on some FUCK SHIT, but i do these bitches raw dog i stuck my shit in they puss and nutted on they face and i updated it with a working video. SUCK A DICK B NO HOMO! Like I told the 149 great work on the opening segment here.The Blond's turn had been talked about for a while and it lived up to all our hype in the PM's. This is actually the first time they've been faces. Though there was a short 3 week peroid where they were fake faces in order to trick Holly and The Rockers. And props to Zack for his segment that was posted here in this folder. SMH@Maddix begging PRL to join like that hoops coach begged Will to join the HS team on fresh prince. step ya dignity game up, blood, you was a second away from offering some dick suckins for membership. Solid exchange between all the folks in this one. Even for a half finished segment it was good. This has been a really good feud with Leon/PRL. Sometimes its hard to build intensity or hatred in a one month feud but by god its been done here! Now, I thought the seg with CI was still pretty funny. Anything with Blonde's shameless stooging is gonna be entertaining. Dudes the Beebop AND Rocksteady to Maddix's shredder, and Megan is krang or whatever that brain looking thing was. She's hotter of course. You'd think Josh would've developed some kind of in-close relationship with Alf given how often he interviews him, but Alf stay giving J.Math the cold shoulder, and won't let any secrets out the bag. J.Math you a bitch,duke, and I hope you cum acid! An excellent contest! Alf put in dat work if it was me I would've written one team getting a clean sweep, 'cause I'm lazy like that. Very good stuff here. We have so many tag teams that you can have this match without huge teams like D*LUX, COD, Moneymaker & Wright, The Gunslingers, The Rockers and The Blonds and its still great. Kinky Malaysia promo, but I feel bad for Maggie. She's my second favorite Nerdly girl behind Molly. Hopefully she gets some get back. Alf did more quality work in the triple threat. Loved the DA involvement and the ending, the DA just even stronger with a rising star like the rising dick. And alf now has someone besides himself to write DA matches. what a smart man! Originally the plan with MD was to reunite him with Baron as a heel version of the Gunslingers, but then Alf came along and that sealed MD's fate as a singles performer from here on out. On a night of excellent matches, the mainevent kept up the pace. If Leon does win at NR we can look forward to some excellent ME's from KC from here on out. Although that's what we get now mostly, but you know what I mean!