

Patty O'Green
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Everything posted by Patty O'Green
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Hmmmmm, we're missing a few key segments. Sooooo maybe this show will be posted in the afternoon EST tomorrow.
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ahhhh crap, my fault. Its Krista Vs Leon this week, and Landon Vs Alf next week
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BI, can host, looking 18 to 45,disease free, be clean, hiv negative,please reply with status and pic, very horny here. hit me up if you are hung, thick and want to facefuck tonight.
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I said got dayum brothers its another very loaded show, with lots and lots of development and angles. Maybe we do experience a summer surge. AS should be flames at this rate.
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A video begins, in a locker room which is totally blacked out, with the exception of a dim light aimed on a muscular figure sitting on a bench with his back to the camera, which slowly moves in on him as the narrator speaks, cutting away only as mentioned below. Come on God, Answer Me. Footage of the man lifting weights, his face still not visible. For Years, I've Been Asking You Why? Footage of the man's hands, as he stares at them off camera. Why are the Innocent Dead and the Guilty Alive? Footage of the man clenching his fists. Where is Justice? Where is Punishment? . . . . . . . . . . . Footage of Brock Ausstin pulverizing Felix Strutter with a clothesline. Or Have You Already Answered? Footage of Brock executing a belly-to-belly on Bohemoth. Have You Already Said to the World, Here is Justice. Here is Punishment. F-STUNNER-5~!!!!!11111 to Alfdogg. Here.... Footage of Brock giving a roar in the ring, then back to the locker room, where the muscular man (Brock, obv.) turns his head and looks back into the camera. ...In Me." BROCK AUSSTIN RETURNS AngleSlam August 31st San Antonio, Texas Live on PPV *cut back to Sofa Central* COLE Yes, many big things on the horizon for AngleSlam, includig the return of the Current Big Think, Brock Ausstin! But right now, we've got a World title match coming up! COACH Wait...we do? COLE Yes. Tha Puerto Rican is coming out here-- Jonathan Coachman puts down his headset on the top of the announce table and then runs away, jumping over the barricade and running through the crowd and out of sight, out of mind. Cole looks on, speechless. COLE Uh...um...oooooookay. Well, um, ahem, hmmm, as we look for another colour commentator, we will be taking this short commercial timeout! We will be right back with the main event: Tha Puerto Rican vs. Brickston for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship right after a word from our sponsor! Coach...? Cole looks at the section of the crowd where Coach ran away like a chicken. He puts his hands up and goes, "Huh?" This is the last image that we see before we fade out and go to the commercial break. FADE OUT Commercials (Cut to Sofa Central.) COLE Welcome back fans. And with Coach gone missing, we are joined by one of the commentators for OAOAST Syndicated, our very own Jesse “The Body” Ventura! The camera zooms out to reveal Jesse “The Body” Ventura seated next to Michael Cole at Sofa Central. Jesse nods his head when being introduced. JESSE “THE BODY” VENTURA Great to be here, Michael Cole, for this incredible contest! The OAOAST World Heavyweight Title being defended LIVE on HeldDOWN~! This is not something that you see everyday! COLE Indeed you don’t, Jess. But we ARE going to see it tonight! One-on-one, Brickston challenges Tha Puerto Rican in an attempt to win his first World Heavyweight Championship! Will he be able to do it? The odds makers say it’s a good possibility. JESSE Tha Puerto Rican has changed since the last time I called a match of his. I’m hoping that Brickston will beat some sense back into him! COLE You might be the only one, partner. The Lightning Bolts are in the arena, and they are hoping for another successful Title defense from their hero. But enough talk, let’s head down to the ring for our main event on tonight’s HeldDOWN~! *Give me fuel Give me fire Give me that which I desire!* “Fuel” by Metallica starts playing, and the song that once made the fans jump in joy now makes them want to vomit. After a few seconds of waiting, the entrance doors slide open, and Brickston comes out, a sneer on his face. Brickston is wearing black short tights that have “BRICKSTON” written on them on the front in big white blocky letters, black fingerless gloves, black kneepads, black shin guards, and black wrestling boots. Behind him comes Vitamin X, clad in another suit and tie ensemble. The crowd boos loudly. Brickston looks at the crowd, the sneer still on his face. Vitamin X applauds his client, pointing at him and proclaiming him the new OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion already. Brickston then walks down the entrance ramp, with Vitamin X right behind him. *DING DING DING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is our main event tonight on HeldDOWN~! It is scheduled for one fall with TV time remaining, and is for the One And Only AngleSault Thread World Heavyweight Championship! Introducing first, the challenger. Coming to the ring at this time. Accompanied to the ring by his manager, Vitamin X. From Sacramento, California. Standing 6’6” and weighing in at 215 pounds. He is a former One And Only AngleSault Thread Italian Champion. He…is…BRICCCCKKKKKKKKKKKSTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNN! COLE Could we be seeing the crowning of a new World Heavyweight Champion here tonight!? JESSE I sure hope so! I’ve been looking forward to this match all night! Brickston continues walking to the ring. COLE Is there anything Tha Puerto Rican can do to prevent losing the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship here tonight? He has fought Brickston on many occasions, but he has not ONCE beat him…well, without any outside help that is! JESSE PRL needed The Lightning Crew to beat Brickston in the past, because he KNOWS that he is the inferior athlete. Brickston has always been the better competitor, and you know what? Tha Puerto Rican has no one to blame for that but himself. HE was the one who brought Brickston into the OAOAST as PROTOTYPE: The PERFECT Lightning Crew Member. HE was the one who trained Brickston to become all powerful and a ring general. HE was the one who made Brickston into the master of the Killswitch and the Anklelock! If Tha Puerto Rican loses the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship tonight, which he will, he has no one to blame for it but himself! Brickston flexes his muscles, and then climbs up the ring steps. Vitamin X follows him. Brickston wipes his feet on the ring apron, and then enters the ring. Brickston lets out a mighty roar, which only causes the crowd to boo him even more. Still, Brickston sports a sinister grin on his face as he taunts the fans who once cheered for him. Brickston makes the “I-Want-The-Belt” hand gesture, as Vitamin X assures him that he will get the belt tonight. Brickston raises his hands in a premature victory celebration and that further irritates the fans. COLE Tha Puerto Rican and Brickston have been at each other’s throats for over FOUR years now, regardless of stable affiliation! But there’s no stables to speak of anymore. The Lightning Crew/Stephen Joseph Popick Corporation is history. Brickston is on his own now, and he has brought Vitamin X along for the ride! JESSE Correction, Vitamin X has brought Brickston along for the ride! COLE Right, of course, silly me. Brickston heads to a second turnbuckle and raises his hands in the air to boos. Brickston taunts the fans for booing him, and then does the “Up yours!” hand gesture. Brickston laughs evilly as Vitamin X looks on in the ring. COLE Brickston has had quite the attitude adjustment this year. JESSE And now he’s fighting for the World Heavyweight Title. Who’s to say that his new attitude hasn’t helped him? Brickston points at a fan and says something to him. JESSE I see this match ending only one way, and one way only. Brickston’s too big, he’s too strong, he’s too massive! Tha Puerto Rican tonight is going to lose the One And Only AngleSault Thread World Heavyweight Championship! It truly is Brickston’s time to shine! Brickston hops off of the second turnbuckle. He talks strategy with Vitamin X in the ring as “Fuel” continues playing. COLE Brickston held the OAOAST Italian Championship, now known as the Heartland Championship, for three months back in 2005. He has been beltless since that time. He is hoping to end that drought tonight by winning the biggest Title of them all, a Title that belongs to his former mentor and friend. JESSE The fact that he hasn’t worn gold in over three years eats at him everyday. He knows that to be noticed in the One And Only AngleSault Thread, you have to have some championship gold in your resume. Brickston has only ONE title to his credit, and that’s it. He HATES that! Well tonight, that will change. People WILL notice him from now on when he’s holding the One And Only AngleSault Thread World Heavyweight Championship! Brickston and Vitamin X look to the entrance. “Fuel” by Metallica dies down. Brickston paces back and forth inside of the ring. Vitamin X demands that PRL come out right now. COLE The pressure is on both men! Will Brickston be able to defeat his biggest rival and win his first World Heavyweight Title? Or will Tha Puerto Rican be able to defeat Brickston by himself WITHOUT any help for the first time ever? JESSE Tha Puerto Rican is a long shot to win, in my mind. He’s got a giant mountain to climb! COLE Brickston HATES Tha Puerto Rican. And Tha Puerto Rican most definitely feels the same way towards Brickston. JESSE He hates everybody. COLE Not Vitamin X. JESSE Well, it’s a business relationship mostly. COLE How do you know? JESSE We’ve spoken a couple of times. COLE Vitamin X has got Brickston primed. It’s like sticking a mad dog with a sharp stick. JESSE And that mad dog might eat Tha Puerto Rican alive tonight! “THE CHAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMP…” *DUN DUN* “…IS…” *DUN* “…HERE!” “YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and “Know Your Role 2000” begins playing, with the crowd standing up and cheering loudly. The lights go down in the arena. PR is heard saying, “THE CHAMP IS HERE!” in tune with the beat of the song, while smoke fills the entrance stage and spotlights circle around and around the arena. A few seconds elapsed, the entrance doors slide open, and then Tha Puerto Rican quickly saunters out through the smoke and power walks down the entrance ramp, not stopping at all, and keeping his eyes focused on the ring. PRL is wearing a black hat, a black vest, and black chaps and has the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt strapped around his waist. BUFFER And his opponent. Coming to the ring at this time. From San Juan, Puerto Rico. Weighing in at 220 pounds. He is the reigning and defending undisputed One And Only AngleSault Thread Heavyweight Champion of the Wooooorrrrrrlllllllllddddddddddddddddddd…The Badd Boy Of The OAOAST…THA PUERTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO RICCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! The crowd cheers louder than before. Tha Puerto Rican gets stopped by a fan who has jumped over the barricade to hug him. The young female fan kisses Tha Puerto Rican! PRL hugs back with a smile on his face and then quickly goes back to walking to the ring while security forces the young female fan to get back to her seat. COLE Young and old, EVERYBODY loves Tha Puerto Rican! He is truly the most resilient, the most charismatic, the most electrifying World Heavyweight Champion in One And Only AngleSault Thread history! JESSE He might have a legion of fans now, but they aren’t wrestling Brickston tonight, he is! COLE But there are Lightning Bolts all over the arena! And they will inspire and motivate him to win tonight! JESSE You’re starting to sound like Tony Schiavone, Michael Cole, and I don’t like it! Tha Puerto Rican stops at ringside to slap hands with the fans in the front row before power walking some more around the ringside area. PRL high fives a fan, and then climbs up the ring steps. Tha Puerto Rican gets onto the ring apron. He gives the fans The People’s Eyebrow. Tha Puerto Rican enters the ring. He spins around; soaking in the fans’ cheers while “Know Your Role 2000” continues playing over the P.A. system. Tha Puerto Rican does the HBK muscle pose while pyro goes off behind him. Brickston and Vitamin X stand in the ring watching this, unimpressed. The crowd is still cheering loudly. COLE Tha Puerto Rican against Brickston, and this could be the impossible task for Tha Puerto Rican! JESSE It will be. Brickston is just too much for the Champ! Tha Puerto Rican unstraps the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt and heads to a second turnbuckle where he raises the OAOAST Championship belt over his head to a pop from the crowd. PRL smiles and thanks the fans. PRL hops off of the second turnbuckle and then walks over to the opposite turnbuckle corner where he climbs the second turnbuckle and raises the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt over his head again to another pop from the crowd. PRL smiles once more and gives the fans a thumbs up. PRL hops off of the second turnbuckle and heads to another second turnbuckle. Once there, Tha Puerto Rican proceeds to raise the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt into the air with his right hand while he “smells the electricity” as a single spotlight shines down on him ala The Rock. PR turns his head back to stare at Brickston, who sneers at The P.R. Menace. COLE Look into the eyes of the World Champion. He is READY for battle! JESSE He may *think* he is ready, but trust me when I say that he isn’t! PRL hops off of the second turnbuckle and heads to the fourth second turnbuckle to do the same Rock pose again, receiving cheers. PRL then hops off of that turnbuckle. Tha Puerto Rican takes off his black hat and throws it into the crowd. He then slings the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt over his left shoulder, and removes his black vest with his right hand and hands it over to a ringside attendant. PRL then removes his black chaps with his right hand and also hands them over to the same ringside attendant. As he does this, Vitamin X massages Brickston’s shoulders. COLE Millions are watching tonight on HeldDOWN~! Tha Puerto Rican looking to have another successful Title defense! Tha Puerto Rican removes his sunglasses with his right hand and hands them over to the ringside attendant. He then removes the earring from his left ear with his right hand and also hands that over to the same ringside attendant. PRL jumps up and down in place while holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt. COLE Tha Puerto Rican is living out his dream, and has been since AngleMania VII! JESSE Well that dream will soon turn into a nightmare, and NOT a P.R. Nightmare, once Brickston gets done with him! “Know Your Role 2000” dies down. Tha Puerto Rican kisses the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt and then hands it over to referee Earl Hebner who raises it over his head to let the fans know that this is a title match. He then hands the OAOAST Championship belt over to the timekeeper who walks with it and places it on top of the timekeeper’s table. A graphic appears on screen letting us know that this match is for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship. COLE This has been a wild night thus far, and what a way to cap things off, with an OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship Match! JESSE I tell ya, Michael, THIS is exactly why the OAOAST is the best professional wrestling organization in the world today! We give fans terrific matches featuring world class athletes like this match for example! COLE Indeed we do, Jess. You won’t hear me disagree with you on that! Earl Hebner pats down Brickston. He goes over the rules with him. He then walks over and pats down Tha Puerto Rican. Earl Hebner goes over the rules with Puerto. As the referee does this, Vitamin X gives Brickston some last minute advice. Earl Hebner goes over the rules one more time with both men, and then calls for the bell. *DING DING DING* OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH THA PUERTO RICAN (Champion) vs. BRICKSTON (Challenger with Vitamin X) The crowd cheers loudly. Vitamin X exits the ring. He speaks to Brickston while on the ring apron. VITAMIN X YOU GOT HIM! YOU GOT HIM! YOU GOT HIM! Brickston nods his head, a cocky smirk on his face. Brickston cracks his knuckles. PRL stretches in a turnbuckle corner. COLE And here we go. Brickston with his first ever OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship shot! JESSE And it’s about time too! I have been wanting him to get a shot for a long time! COLE Since when!? JESSE Since he came into the company, dingus! Brickston and VX high five each other. Vitamin X then jumps off of the ring apron and onto the floor. Brickston flicks his wrists. PRL continues stretching in the turnbuckle corner. COLE The dream came true for Tha Puerto Rican at AngleMania VII by defeating Stephen Joseph Popick. Will the dream continue after tonight? Tha Puerto Rican and Brickston circle each other. Brickston flexes his muscles. The crowd boos loudly. Vitamin X applauds his client. COLE There is definitely a size difference between the two. PRL, 5’9” 220 lbs. Brickston, 6’6” 215 lbs. JESSE That, along with talent, is why Tha Puerto Rican will lose tonight. Tha Puerto Rican stands there, unimpressed by Brickston’s huge muscle mass. Brickston taunts the fans. PRL looks at the fans and points to Brickston, saying, “Can you believe this guy?” BRICKSTON COME ON P.R.! YOU AIN’T SHIT! Tha Puerto Rican and Brickston circle each other some more. They lock up. Both men jockey for position. With neither man gaining the advantage, both guys let go. PRL flicks his wrists, and then circles the ring with his rival. Tha Puerto Rican and Brickston lock up again. Brickston strikes first by hitting PRL in the face! He then gives him an uppercut! Followed by another uppercut! And another uppercut! He then starts punching Tha Puerto Rican all over his body! COLE Tha Puerto Rican must move! He can NOT let Brickston hammer on him like this at ANY time during the match, much less the start of it! Vitamin X cheers Brickston on as Brickston nails Puerto Rican with shots to the gut! P.R. is soon clutching his stomach, sucking in wind, bent over from all of the shots to his stomach. Brickston grabs PRL by his Puerto Rican flag bandana and pulls his head back so that he can talk trash on his former mentor! VITAMIN X YEAH BABY! YEAH! COLE And Vitamin X is surely enjoying this! He has vowed to take someone to the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship since he can’t do it himself! JESSE Vitamin X will now have a chance to show his brilliant mind for the business! We all know how talented he was in the ring, and now we will see how talented he is OUTSIDE of the ring! Brickston gets all up in PRL’s face, and then gives the World Champ a short-armed clothesline! COLE Oh my! A clothesline that turns Tha Puerto Rican inside out! JESSE Brickston is dominating, not surprisingly! Brickston sneers at the fans. COLE I can remember a time when Brickston clotheslining Tha Puerto Rican would get him cheered! JESSE Yeah, well, you can’t really trust OAOAST fans! They’re a bunch of fair-weather fans! Tha Puerto Rican is already on his hands and knees, breathing hard! Earl Hebner checks on PRL’s condition, but PRL ignores him and rolls around the ring, trying to shake the cobwebs out. Vitamin X screams on the outside for Brickston to continue his attack and to not stop for one second. VITAMIN X TACKLE HIM! TAKE HIM! TAKE HIM! TAKE HIM! Tha Puerto Rican gets up, so Brickston takes him to the ropes, grabs him by his left hand, and then whips PRL into the opposite ropes. PRL bounces off of the opposite ropes, right into a Big Boot from Brickston--CAUGHT by Tha Puerto Rican! PR sneers at Brickston, and then does a legsweep, causing Brickston to fall on his back onto the mat! The crowd cheers! COLE Tha Puerto Rican swept the leg! JESSE We’re not going to get Brickston a body bag just yet, though! Tha Puerto Rican quickly bounces off of the ropes, and then nails Brickston with a front dropkick right in the mush! PRL stands up and runs his mouth on Brickston as he recovers! Brickston sits up, so PRL kicks him in the face! He then kicks him again! And again! PRL continues kicking Brickston in the face until he kicks him squared in the nose, causing Brickston to fall on his back! COLE Tha Puerto Rican is using his quickness to take down Brickston! JESSE That’s what he’s gotta do in order to win. The problem is, how long will he be able to use his quickness for? COLE I’m sure PRL hopes for the entire match! JESSE Somehow I doubt Brickston will let him use his quickness for that long! THA PUERTO RICAN COME ON JABRONI! Brickston rubs his eyes, and then sits up. PR gets on his knees and punches Brickston in the face repeatedly! COLE Brickston is in trouble already! JESSE It usually takes Brickston 15-20 minutes to warm up, don’t worry! COLE At this rate, the match might not even last that long! Puerto hits Brickston with left jabs to the face! Punch. Punch. Punch. NOW KISS THAT LEFT~! Punch! Brickston goes down! Tha Puerto Rican stands up and waits for Brickston to follow suit. COLE Tha Puerto Rican showing Brickston that he is NOT imitidated! For PRL to win this match, he’s gotta be quick! He’s gotta wrestle Brickston and keep the big man down! PRL grabs Brickston by his left hand, and then gives Brickston an Irish whip into the opposite ropes--Brickston reverses, PRL bounces off of the opposite ropes, Brickston lifts him up in the Gorilla Press Slam position, HOWEVER Tha Puerto Rican slips out of Brickston’s grasp and lands on his feet right behind him! PRL punches Brickston in the back a few times, and then applies a chinlock on Brickston! But the chinlock quickly ends as Brickston elbows PRL in the gut, causing PRL to scream out, “OOF!” in the process. JESSE So much for that little piece of offense! P.R. walks around the ring bent over clutching his stomach, that is until Brickston grabs him and walks with him over to the ropes. Brickston grabs Puerto Rican by his Puerto Rican flag bandana and his tights and simply throws him underneath the bottom ring rope--BUT WAIT! PRL shifts his weight so that he lands on his stomach, and it is Brickston who goes flying OVER the top rope and onto the floor! COLE And oh my! What a nice manuever there by Tha Puerto Rican! JESSE He got lucky there, Cole! COLE That was great quickness there by Tha Puerto Rican! Tha Puerto Rican went South, Brickston went North! Earl Hebner begins his 10 count. He tells PRL to stay back. However, once the referee gets to the count of 3, Tha Puerto Rican bounces off of the ropes and delivers a baseball slide right into the washboard abs of Brickston! Brickston clutches his stomach in pain, but he doesn’t fall! So, seeing Brickston bent over clutching his stomach, Tha Puerto Rican once again bounces off of the ropes, rushes forward gaining speed, and then LEAPS OVER THE TOP ROPE CRASHING INTO BRICKSTON WITH A TOPE CON HILO~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” COLE Oh my! What an incredible move from the World Heavyweight Champion! He’s showing us what brought him into the dance! JESSE He caught Brickston off guard! Brickston wasn’t prepared for THAT! COLE Nothing wrong with that, Jesse! PRL must use his quickness and surprise Brickston if he wants to leave here the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion! P.R. gets on his hands and knees and starts pummeling Brickston with right hands! Vitamin X stands a few feet away from this and yells out for Brickston to fight back! P.R. stops fighting so that he can get back into the ring at the count of 3. COLE The World Champion is in control of the challenger at the moment! JESSE Yeah, at the moment, Cole! Vitamin X runs over and tries to help his client get back to his feet. As he does this, Tha Puerto Rican lets out a mighty roar, mocking Brickston to the delight of the fans! JESSE Look at the arrogance of our World Heavyweight Champion! Mocking his opponent while he’s down! COLE Hey, Tha Puerto Rican might have changed a lot since being kicked out of The Lightning Crew, but he hasn’t COMPLETELY changed! He still has a lot of arrogance! He’s still as brash and as cocky as he ever was! JESSE And this is a good thing since when? COLE Since Tha Puerto Rican developed a heart and became a better human being overall. JESSE I haven’t seen evidence of that, Michael Cole. COLE Just look at these fans’ reactions to him, and that’s all the evidence that you will need! JESSE Nah! PR prepares to bounce off of the ropes, but stops when he sees Vitamin X helping Brickston up. Earl Hebner begins another 10 count. PR decides to go ahead and bounce off of the ropes anyway, rushing forward and sliding underneath the bottom ring rope. PRL bumps into Vitamin X, causing The X-Man to freak out and run away! Brickston turns PRL around and goes for a punch--BLOCKED by The People’s Champion! PR fires off with Rock-style punches to the temple on the outside! The punches get Brickston good and dazed, so PRL throws the big man back into the ring! PRL then hops onto the ring apron and then hops onto the top rope. He waits for Brickston to get up, and when he does, Tha Puerto Rican soars, nailing Brickston in the head with The People’s Axe (Double Axehandle)! Brickston goes down! COLE The People’s Axe by The People’s Champion! JESSE Dwayne Johnson really should look into suing Tha Puerto Rican real soon. COLE Will you stop!? PRL throws up a “Killa B” for his fans, and then waits for Brickston to get up. Once he does, PR bounces off of the ropes and leaps onto Brickston’s shoulders! Brickston goes for a Powerbomb, but PRL is able to prevent that move from happening by bringing Brickston down onto the mat with a hurricarana! COLE Hurricarana by Tha Puerto Rican! Going back to his high-flying moves that made him a star! JESSE Well that, and copious amounts of cheating. COLE That…is true. P.R. motions for Brickston to get up. Brickston gets up, albeit a little slower this time. Vitamin X yells at Brickston to “GET BACK ON THE BALL!“ P.R. bends down and prepares to attack. When Brickston is bent over, P.R. launches forward and leaps onto Brickston’s back! PRL then adjusts his body so that he is now on Brickston’s shoulders! Brickston walks with Tha Puerto Rican on his shoulders, desperately trying to get him off of him! TPR tries to maintain his balance on Brickston’s shoulders! Brickston tries to throw PRL off of him, but PRL stops that by punching Brickston in the face repeatedly! COLE PRL on Brickston’s shoulders! JESSE He’s on top of the world! COLE PRL taking a risk here! Brickston walks towards the ropes with Tha Puerto Rican still on his shoulders. He intends to throw Tha Puerto Rican over the top rope and onto the floor, but Tha Puerto Rican wraps his legs around Brickston’s head, so when Brickston attempts to throw PRL off of him onto the floor, Brickston is taken over the top rope with him and it is Brickston who ends up lying on his back on the protective mats! PRL is holding onto the top ring rope, so he skins the cat back into the ring! PRL plays to the crowd! The crowd cheers! COLE Unbelieveable! Tha Puerto Rican is in control! JESSE I can’t believe it, McMahon--I mean, Cole! COLE That was a leverage move! Tha Puerto Rican outsmarted Brickston and then utilized his leverage to get Brickston up and over and outside of the ring! Brickston’s gotta be very frustrated right about now! Tha Puerto Rican grabs the top ring rope and leaps over it, landing on Brickston’s shoulders! PRL goes for another hurricarana, but Brickston holds on tight, refusing to let go. PRL realizes he’s in trouble and tries to escape by punching Brickston in the head! But the punches have no effect on Brickston, who eventually lets Tha Puerto Rican go by POWERBOMBING HIM ONTO THE PROTECTIVE MATS!!! COLE OH MY~! A Powerbomb on the outside! Tha Puerto Rican has been DRIVEN into the COLD HARD concrete! JESSE Uh…there ARE protective mats there, Michael. COLE COLD. HARD. CONCRETE! JESSE Whatever. Vitamin X applauds Brickston for the Powerbomb. Earl Hebner has started his 10 count. Brickston raises his hands in the air and sneers at the crowd. PRL lies on the protective mats writhing in pain. Brickston slaps PRL in the face while he’s writhing! COLE Such arrogance from the challenger! JESSE Hey, PRL asked for it! COLE How so? JESSE By mocking Brickston! COLE Brickston didn’t see it! JESSE He sensed it! COLE Oh come on! Brickston climbs back into the ring. Earl Hebner starts his 10 count. COLE PRL looks to be in serious pain here! He’s having trouble getting up! JESSE He’ll probably stay down to retain his Title! He knows Brickston is too much for him! Tha Puerto Rican gets on his side, holding his back. Earl Hebner’s count is up to 3. “FOUR!” COLE Oh, PRL is not moving. He is NOT moving! JESSE The referee should stop the count! Give PRL time to recover! “FIVE!” VITAMIN X GET UP CHAMP! GET UP! “SIX!” PRL sits up on the protective mats. But he is still holding his back in pain. “SEVEN!” JESSE Hey! GET UP ALREADY! COLE Tha Puerto Rican is having great difficulty getting up now! JESSE He’s gonna do it! That little sneak! COLE Jess, come on, he’s hurt! JESSE Oh so now he’s fooling you? You’re even worse than Tony Schiavone, Michael Cole! Atleast HE would see right through this for what it really is! A cheap ploy to retain the Title! COLE Jess, I don’t think that’s the case now. Maybe last year it would have been, but now, I don’t think so. JESSE Shows how little you know about the wrestling business, Michael Cole! Once a snake, ALWAYS a snake! “EIGHT!” Brickston starts to get annoyed. “NINE!” BRICKSTON WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? VITAMIN X NO! NO! NO! PRL uses the ring apron to pull himself up off of the protective mats. He is on wobbly legs as he stands up. “TEN! THAT’S IT! RING THE BELL!” *DING DING DING* (5:38) “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE The bell has rung! Tha Puerto Rican has retained the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship! JESSE PRL saved himself! He saved himself from Brickston! He saved his Title right there! COLE Jess, Tha Puerto Rican was out of it following that Powerbomb on the floor! I’m not surprised that he couldn’t get up at the count of 10! JESSE Baloney! Our World Heavyweight Champion is a coward! And it makes me sick to my stomach! Brickston yells at the referee. But Earl Hebner stands by his decision. On the outside, Vitamin X is freaking out too! Tha Puerto Rican is using the ring apron to keep himself up. COLE Brickston FAILED to win the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title in his first crack at it, but it was only thanks to Tha Puerto Rican unable to answer the 10 count! Who knows what would have happened if Tha Puerto Rican was able to get back into the ring! JESSE He would have LOST the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship! That’s what would have happened! Tha Puerto Rican escaped with the victory because he KNEW that he had been outmatched by his proteage! He has SCREWED Brickston out of the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship! He’s still the same scrub he always was! COLE PRL looks seriously hurt, Jess! JESSE And that is why you will never be even HALF of the commentator that I am! Brickston is FUMING in the ring! Vitamin X is also pissed on the outside. But Earl Hebner still stands by decision. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner, as a result of countout…BRICCCCKKKKKKKKKKKSTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNN! The crowd boos loudly. Brickston doesn’t care that he won. JESSE It doesn’t matter since he doesn’t have the World Heavyweight Championship! BUFFER HOWEVER, because the One And Only AngleSault Thread World Heavyweight Championship can NOT change hands on countout…STILL the One And Only AngleSault Thread Heavyweight Champion of the Woooorrrrrlllllllldddddddddddddddddddd…THA PUERTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO RICCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Brickston grabs Earl Hebner and scoops him up onto his shoulders. He then gives him the KILLSWITCH! COLE Now come on! That’s not right! JESSE The referee made a bad call! COLE How so? JESSE He should have given Tha Puerto Rican enough time to get back into the ring! COLE Jess, he DID! JESSE NO HE DIDN'T! THIS IS A WORLD TITLE MATCH! BEND THE RULES A LITTLE! The crowd boos loudly. Brickston looks down at the fallen Earl Hebner. His eyes bulging out, veins about to pop, Brickston lets out a mighty roar! The crowd boos some more! COLE Uh-oh! Brickston has snapped! JESSE He’s loose, Michael Cole! Brickston sees Tha Puerto Rican on the outside. Brickston exits the ring and grabs PRL! He then throws the groggy Puerto Rican into the ring. COLE The match is over, Brickston! JESSE But the war has just begun! Brickston climbs up the ring steps and then enters the ring himself as the fans start panicking for Tha Puerto Rican. PRL is crawling on his hands and knees with Brickston standing tall over him. Brickston picks P.R. up, throwing his Puerto Rican flag bandana away in the process…and then scoops him up onto his shoulders. COLE Oh no! No! No! JESSE He’s gonna do it! Brickston parades around the ring with Tha Puerto Rican on his shoulders, a sinister grin on his face. Brickston then throws PRL off of his shoulders, and gives him the KILLSWITCH! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE Killswitch! Killswitch on Tha Puerto Rican! JESSE Serves him right for weaseling out of this match-up! COLE Oh come on! Jess, this isn’t right! JESSE This is justice being served the HARD way by Brickston! COLE Oh puh-leeze! Brickston lets out a mighty roar again! The crowd boos! Tha Puerto Rican holds his back in pain again! Brickston turns PRL onto his stomach, grabs his right leg, gets down on his left knee, and then applies the ANKLELOCK on Tha Puerto Rican! COLE The Anklelock! The match is over! JESSE Who cares!? PRL is getting just desserts now and I love it! HA! HA! HA! Brickston twists the ankle! Tha Puerto Rican TAPS OUT, but it is of no use as this isn’t even a match! The crowd boos loudly! “BRICK-STON SUCKS!” “BRICK-STON SUCKS!” “BRICK-STON SUCKS!” “BRICK-STON SUCKS!” Vitamin X enters the ring. He applauds Brickston for the Anklelock, and then taunts Tha Puerto Rican, who screams out in pain! COLE Brickston lost his chance to become OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion, and he is FURIOUS! JESSE Once again, Brickston has Tha Puerto Rican tapping out to the Anklelock! Some things will never change, eh, Cole? Vitamin X slaps PRL in the face several times! He points a menacing finger at the Latin Lion and taunts him as Brickston continues applying the deadly Anklelock on PRL! COLE Somebody stop this! “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” Security and referees come into the ring. They try to pull Brickston off of Tha Puerto Rican, but are unsuccessful! COLE Security and referees out here, trying to get Brickston off of Tha Puerto Rican! JESSE It won’t work! You will need the 81st Airborne to get Brickston off of Tha Puerto Rican right now! COLE Brickston is clinging onto that Anklelock! He REFUSES to let go! JESSE Give to the weasel! He deserves it! Security physically tries to pull Brickston off of Tha Puerto Rican. They are successful…for about 2 seconds, as Brickston goes back to applying the Anklelock on Tha Puerto Rican! PRL screams out in pain. He taps out again! JESSE Tha Puerto Rican taps out! You see? He IS the inferior athlete! He really is! COLE Jess, any man would have tapped out by now! Brickston’s Anklelock is the most deadly submission move in the OAOAST! JESSE The World Champion should be able to survive it! But he can’t, therefore proving how weak our World Champion really is! COLE That’s ridiculous and you know it! JESSE Who’s screaming out in pain now? It’s certainly not Brickston! Vitamin X tries to talk to security, but they are too busy trying to get Brickston off of PRL! OAOAST Road Agents “Macho Man” Randy Savage, Terry Funk, Terry Taylor and Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat come out and try their hand at pulling Brickston off of Tha Puerto Rican, but all four are unsuccessful! JESSE Look at that! Even three wrestling legends and Terry Taylor couldn’t pull Brickston off of Tha Puerto Rican! COLE Brickston has snapped! He wants revenge for losing this match! JESSE And he’s getting revenge right here, right now! Brickston turns the Anklelock into a heel hook! PRL further screams out in pain! He taps out again! COLE And now the heel hook! The heel hook on PRL! JESSE What a great way to end this great show! COLE Tha Puerto Rican at the mercy of Brickston as we end this week’s HeldDOWN~! The OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion is at the mercy of his former proteage! Fans, we are out of time! We will see you all next week! Brickston continues applying the Heel Hook on Tha Puerto Rican as we FADE TO BLACK
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THE FOLLOWING PROGRAM IS INTENDED FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY PRESENTED IN HD Ultimate Victory sends its epic stylings across the globe as the introductory video showcases just what type of wild and crazy action our viewers are in store for tonight. We fade out from a shot of Zack Malibu standing on a mountain top to.... (one day I will write the actual video. that day is not today. maybe next week!) From the logo we're taken directly to our fabled announce team, Michael Cole in an Orange polo and khaki pants and Coach in SWAT team gear to protect himself from any other wrestlers who wish to beat his ass half to death. COLE Welcome one, welcome all to OAOAST HeldDOWN~! I'm Michael joined by the fresh out the ER, Johnathan Coachman. Brett Farvre got shipped to the Jets and you almost shipped yourself to another country on a jet when you saw PRL today. COACH I ain't gonna address that swagger jacking, second rate John Cena, third rate Rock, domincian ass wannabe Puerto Rican bum! I got connections and if anything else happens to me, dawgs know who to get it. Can't believe I would get treated like that. What's on tonight? COLE Huge matches, including a world title defense with the newly rechristened Brickston, two Money In The Bank semifinal contests with Colombian Heat going against four time SWF and one time OAOAST world champion Landon Maddix, three time OAOAST World Champion faces former HI-YAH Heavyweight Champion Bohemoth, and she of the walk of the fame, Krista Isadora Duncan makes an apperence on The Love Shack hosted by Leon Rodez of the In Crowd! Let's get this party started! The rasping sounds of "Wild Side" by Motley Crue begin to play out through the arena, an unwelcome sound for the young lady that stands in the ring. In her purple athletic attire the newcomer, looking no older than 20 and about 120 pounds soaking wet, looks nervous. With good reason, as the Women's Champion makes her way to the ring, flanked by her man Jock Mulligan, both exuding confidence. BUFFER The following non-title contest is set for one fall... first, in the ring, from Barnesville, Pennsylvania, KELLY BENNETTE! *polite applause* And her opponent making her way to the ring. Accompanied by "Mr. Dick", Jock Mulligan... she is the OAOAST Women's Champion... MMMAAALLLLLAAAYYYYYSSSIIIIIIAAAAAAA... NNEEEERRRRRRRDDLLLLLYYYYYYY!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The intimidating Women's Champion enters the ring, unnerving her young opponent with a crack of the cat o'nine tails. COLE Well a great opportunity for this young lady from the Philadelphia area to compete on national TV, but... that's about the best you can say for her situation I think. Malaysia Nerdly has been nothing but dominant since surfacing in the OAOAST a few months ago. Virtually unstoppable. And the reason why Bennette is here is, pretty much, because no-one else is willing to face her! COACH That's right. All her sisters are way too smart for that, the Megans and the Mackenzies and the Hollywoods are all way too smart for that. Infact the only people dumb and desperate enough are girls without a contract and life failures like Jade Rodez who wanna make mommy proud. COLE You're reffering of course to the news broken on OAOAST.com this week, that Jade challenged Malaysia to a Women's Title rematch, which has been signed for AngleSlam in San Antonio. And, I'll be honest, I can't say any good things coming out of that. *DINGDINGDING!* With the bell sounded, Malaysia relinquishes her title and just as begrudgingly her whip. COLE So, Women's Title not on the line here. This just a tune-up for the ultimate combination of beauty and beatdowns. Looking to make good on her big opportunity, Bennette comes out of her corner determined to take the fight to Malaysia. She attacks her much larger opponent with a few forearms, which Malaysia absorbs before shoving her casually to the ground. To her credit, Kelly rolls back to her feet and charges in again. But Malaysia guides her against the turnbuckles before driving her shoulder into the midsection repeatedly. Each shoulder thrusts lifts Bennette off her feet and she cringes in pain, as Malaysia breaks clean... only to brush the referee aside and drive a running boot into Bennette's ribcage against the turnbuckles! COLE You have to admire Jade's courage for challenging Malaysia to another match, considering the way their previous two have gone. But as Kelly Bennette is proving, courage only gets you so far against the out-and-out physicality of the Women's Champion. Malaysia drags Bennette out of the corner and by her hair, throws her face-first into the mat. By the hair again, Malaysia picks her up and throws her backwards. Kelly's head whiplashes off the hard canvas and ignoring the warnings of the referee, Malaysia stands over LICKING the strands of brunette hair tangled between her fingers. COLE This is a dangerous woman and also a disturbing woman. COACH She enjoys her work, put it that way. Dragging Bennette across the ring, Malaysia positions her throat-first on the bottom rope and stands on her neck! "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" Malaysia breaks, Jock right in her poor opponent's face teasing her as she coughs and splutters. COLE Jock clearly enjoying himself. I doubt he'll be laughing so hard come AngleSlam, when he faces former partner Baron Windels one on one in their home state of Texas! More dragging pulls Bennette back into the centre of the ring. Her leg hands limp in Malaysia's hands and she isn't so much turned over as flung over onto her back, for a hard elbowdrop to the chest... 1... 2... No! COLE Kickout... and a smile from Malaysia, oh dear. COACH See that's the thing, Malaysia LOVES this! You kickout against a normal opponent, they're cussing out the ref, throwing a fit. All you're doing against Malaysia is giving her more of a thrill by prolonging the agony. Malaysia pulls Bennette back to her feet, still smiling as she torques back the neck with a handful of hair. A knee doubles Bennette up, before Malaysia slugs her back to the mat with a short range clothesline. Looking to be on her last legs, Bennette clambers back up. Waiting on her, Malaysia grips her in a gutwrench and hauls her from knees to feet, then from feet up into a Canadian Backbreaker. A submission is on the cards as Malaysia racks away with the hold for a few seconds. But, unfortunately, the worst is yet to come for poor little Kelly, as Malaysia stops, turns her upside down... and sits out with a THUNDEROUS piledriver, dropping her right on her head!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE There's that sickening piledriver that's put pay to so many. Placing a hand on Bennette, Malaysia demands the count... 1... 2... 3!! *DINGDINGDING!* COLE And another comprehensive win for Formula 1 president Max Mosley's favourite wrestler. COACH How many people are possibly gonna get that? BUFFER Here is your winner, the OAOAST Women's Champion... MALAYSIA NNEEERRRDDLLLLLYYYY!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Jock slides in and shoves the poor referee aside to do his own honours of raising Malaysia's hand in victory. The two make eyes at each other with pure, creepy lust, Malaysia running her hand up and down Jock's washboard abs. Annoyingly they're interrupted by the referee again, handing over the Women's Title to Malaysia. She snatches it away and warns him off with a glare, before dragging Jock from the ring and to the back for who knows what. COLE What a lovely couple. Watching all this with great interest is none other than Jade Rodez-Duncan. Great interest, coupled with great nervousness, coupled with just a little bit of disgust at the post-match scene. But mainly it's the nervousness. Not watching with great interest, or any interest at all for that matter meanwhile, is Krista Isadora Duncan, proprieter of the locker room and currently busy fixing her hair in her mirror ahead of her public appearance. Jade looks up from the TV screen a couple of times hoping to catch eye contact with her mother. But she's fixated with her reflection, forcing Jade to quaintly clear her throat to get her attention. JADE Mom... can we talk about Malaysia? KRISTA I don't know. Have a go by all means. JADE Uhm... well, okay, see the thing is I challeng... KRISTA (sticks her fingers in her ears) Oh dear, nope nope nope, doesn't look like you can after all. Lalala, you make me wanna lala... ugh, now see what you've got me singing!? I think I need to throw up. Pass me that martini I thoughtlessly placed on the radiator a half hour ago, that oughta push me the extra step of the way. Fingers down the throat is so archane. JADE Please? KRISTA *sighs* Okay, I'm not gonna lie to you honey. You were... uhm... Krista looks at the look on Jade's face. KRISTA Okay, so I'm not going to tell you the truth either. Are you sure we can't just do something else that'll hurt your feelings instead but will be easier to gloss over by this weekend when I need you to babysit Maya. Oh, yeah, by the way, I need you to babysit Maya this weekend. JADE I challenged Malaysia to a match at AngleSlam. This is going to go away. KRISTA Oh alright, fine, make me make you hate me! Who actually taught you to wrestle? JADE Well, Leon... and I trained at the OAOAST school for a little while. KRISTA Oh lordy lordy lordy. See there's your problem! The OAOAST wrestling school has to the best of my knowledge, which by the way does not usually stretch to such insignificant matters but I make an exception in this case, produced precisely three people ever. All of whom largeless worthless, thus evidenced by their pitance salaries paid in rusty dimes and nickles and stolen World War II food stamps which unbeknownest to him Clem is no longer collecting, which incidentally provides the sole reason I call them largely worthless as opposed to completely and utterly worthless. And as for Leon, what the heck has he ever done? No, really, he's interviewing me in about 15 minutes and I need any and all ammunition. I'm pretty certain we have very little to talk about. It's not like our lives or careers have ever become entangled in any meaningful or suspiciously convenient way. Look, you weren't neccessarily 'bad'. You just weren't doing things the Duncan way. Although, I consider everything not done the Duncan way to be bad as a matter of principal. You see the dillemma I'm in. Can you please commit to babysitting Maya this weekend before we go any further? Jade looks sadly at the floor. JADE So... uhm, would you... help me be better. Please? KRISTA Oh, honey, of course I will. JADE It doesn't have to be much. I know you're very busy. Just some of what it takes to be a Duncan. KRISTA Well, it is my specialist subject. That and modern greats of the movie industries featuring partial and full front female nudity. Someday a gameshow will accept me as a contestant so I can prove it. Someday... *looks off into distance wistfully* Anyway, until that day comes, we'll take a new haircut as your starter for 10. And by ten, I of course mean 1000, the guesstimate amount of dollars it's going to take to sort all of... this wild growth out. Then we'll fit you up with a new wardrobe, at a price the closest to excellence and not one penny under. And then you'll be ready for the wild world of the OAOAST, where everything's made up and the titles don't matter. JADE Once you've taught me what it takes to be a Duncan. KRISTA Yeah, as I just described. JADE What about the wrestling? Holding up a hand to pause her daughter, Krista grabs herself a martini, purely and simply to take a sip to allow her to execute a spittake. As it's been sitting on the radiator, it actually helps ward off the urge to swallow precious alcohol. KRISTA Sorry, that was the only suitable way to portray my amusement at that statement without further crippling emotional pain, which I am somewhat hesitant to do to you since you're my daughter, legally old enough to babysit my other dauther 'n all. Jade, you clearly have a lot to learn. Trust me when I say, knowledge of professional wrestling is the LEAST important piece of the puzzle that is my successful career! No, you're right, I am very busy. I will happily teach you the important stuff. How to dress, how to present yourself, snappy putdowns and the fine art of charisma. Anything else will be Vinny Valentine. JADE Huh? KRISTA Tedious and painful to experience. It's my new OAOAST word substitution system I've developed, to allow me to sneak in even more unwarranted shots at people. You can never have enough. Anyway, I've asked Alix to take care of what little physical training there may be in your transformation and she had little choice but to accept with the new parental lock I placed on her laptop able to block any and all female nudity at my command. Harsh, perhaps. But for me I would consider it relatively high in the moral stakes. And I didn't even have the heart to so much as threaten full removal of spare batteries from the house. I must be going Christian Wright. JADE Huh? KRISTA Soft. JADE Oh. Of course. Seeing that her daughter isn't seeming to upbeat about the prospects of all this, Krista tries to cheer her up with a consoling click of the fingers to get her attention. Okay, so, not so consoling. But attention grabbing. KRISTA Listen, trust me, once I'm done styling and re-creating you, you'll be a Duncan. Now, about babysitting Maya... JADE Yeah, it's no problem. KRISTA Great. In that case, now that it's signed, sealed and official, you're welcome to watch me verbally castrate your uncle in front of everyone. It'll give you and Maya something to talk about while you're no longer talking to me. Toodles! Off scoots Krista, leaving Jade to dread what's about to happen for yet another different reason. We then fade to commercial COMING UP NEXT QUARTERFINAL MONEY IN THE BANK MATCH LANDON MADDIX VS COLOMBIAN HEAT NEXT LATER TONIGHT ***WORLD TITLE MATCH*** PRL VS BRICKSTON WITH VITAMIN X TONIGHT A commercial comes on, showing the Deadly Alliance standing in front of a gray background, shot from the waists up, wearing tuxedos, with serious looks on their faces. VOICEOVER This is the Deadly Alliance for the One And Only Anglesault Thread. The camera starts to pan out. VOICEOVER Read OAOAST HeldDOWN~! every Thursday! (or Friday, or Saturday) The camera has panned out to shoot their whole bodies, to reveal Thunderkid wearing a ballerina's dress, Reject wearing Zubaz with swin fins and a seahorse life raft, Alfdogg wearing boxer shorts and cowboy boots, and Sandman9000 wearing golf shorts and clown shoes. VOICEOVER It's Serious E-fedding, in the One And Only Anglesault Thread! COMMERCIAL
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-The scene fades in to Sophie Grey sitting behind Josie's desk. A long, thin cigarette hangs in her mouth. The phone rings, and, of course, she picks it up. SOPHIE Bonjour? Non, je suis désolé, Josie est hors de ville. Je suis le président temporaire d'OAOAST jusqu'à ce qu'elle revienne. Comment est-ce que je peux aider le you?... bonjour? Bonjour? -Sophie hangs up the phone, shrugging. Suddenly, a knock is heard at the door. SOPHIE Entré! -In walks Colin Maguire, Sr. and Colin Maguire, Jr. Both men wear matching blue Burberry suits. The fans boo at the sight of CMJ. Maguire Sr. sits down in one of the empty chairs, smiling a little smile. SOPHIE Comment allez-vous, M. Maguire? MAGUIRE I...I don't understand what you're saying, Sophie. JUNIOR Who gives a shit, Dad... -Maguire smiles, then stands. He walks slowly around the desk, now standing beside Sophie. MAGUIRE Where's Josie, Sophie? SOPHIE Madame Baker est hors de ville, sa fille est malade, ainsi elle a dû aller à Hollywood pour la semaine. Est-ce que je peux vous aider? -Maguire smirks a little bit, reaching into his back pocket. MAGUIRE I don't get you frogs, Sophie...I simply don't. You come into this country, and ya don't even learn the fuckin' language...Do ya speak English at all? -Sophie, now a little shaken, shakes her head slowly. Maguire chuckles a little bit, looking back at his son, who smirks. Maguire looks back at Sophie...before pulling out a knife. MAGUIRE You see this knife?...I'm going to teach you to speak English with this fucking knife, you little frog bitch. Where's Josie? -Sophie's eyes go wide as she hits a button on the intercom...nothing. She slaps it again as tears start welling up in her eyes. MAGUIRE You're callin' for yer little ghetto ass bodyguards, I assume, aint'cha? Well...I took care of that problem. -The door opens slowly, revealing Michael "Mickey" Gillpatrick and Patrick Callhan. They walk towards the desk, chuckling. MAGUIRE Where...is...Josie? -Sophie, now sobbing, shakes her head and stands, backing away slowly. SOPHIE Elle est dans Hollywood, je vous a dit que.... s'il vous plaît, s'il vous plaît laissez-seulement moi...... -Maguire looks back at Mickey and nods. Mickey and Patrick suddenly advance towards Sophie, grabbing her by the arms. Sophie screams, but Maguire silences her, shoving the knife next to her mouth. MAGUIRE Now you listen...your boy is ducking MY boy. Not only that, but that little bitch Jereme is the ONLY person my boy has faced...you tell your whore cousin that my boy isn't waiting 'till AngleSlam to get his shot at the title, and that he wants to face more people...Understand? -Sophie nods slowly, the tears now streaming down her face. Maguire puts the knife down on the desk, a wide shit eating grin plastered on his face. He nods once again towards Mickey, who slams Sophie down, face-first, onto the desk. Maguire picks up Sophie's still-burning cigarette. MAGUIRE ...and just to show you we're not kidding... -Maguire drives the flaming embers into the back of Sophie's neck, causing her to scream. Mickey covers her mouth as Maguire flicks the cigarette away. He adjusts his suit, signaling toward the door with his head. MAGUIRE Let's go...this little frog whore gets the message. -Mickey lets go of Sophie, as all four members of the IRA walk out, chuckling, leaving Sophie alone. Her sobs are muffled as she crumples to the floor. Fade to..
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(This would be a couple of segments after the match, if you can) We come back from commercial break and see Cooper Riley, sitting on a chair by the monitor in the locker room, with his face bandaged up and holding his shoulder. Sly Sommers walks into the room, pulls up a chair, and sits down next to Cooper Riley. SLY Coop...you okay? *Cooper nods* Bro, I'm not going to give you too much crap since I did stupid things when I was just starting out too. But, I do hope you got this superstar stuff out of your system. Let your talent develop naturally. There's a reason why they call it "climbing the ladder". You don't just go from the first rung to the top! COOPER I know, I know...I'm sorry. I should've listened to you. You were just looking out for my best interest. I didn't listen and I got hurt. SLY Doctor said you're going to be okay...it could've been a lot worse. Tell you what: since your shoulder isn't completely out of socket and your eye looks to be intact, I did you a favor and signed you to a match on Syndicated. You're gonna wrestle some guys who I trained with when I was wrestling on independent shows after wrestling school. COOPER Wait...GUYS?!?! SLY Don't worry; I'll be your partner. Nothing to worry about. It'll be a real nice learning experience for you, man. The camera zooms in on Cooper's concerned face, as we dissolve to the next scene... COLE Right now, let's go to Michael Buffer for the announcement of our second Money in the Bank quarterfinal match! *DING DING DING* (slow and dramatic) BUFFER LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLadies and gentlemen...this is our second Money in the Bank quarterfinal match of the evening. Tonight, one of the OAOAST's biggest in stature squares off against one of its biggest in credentials in a first-time ever match, for the right to advance to the semifinals of the Money in the Bank tournament. ARE YOU READY? *crowd cheers* BUFFER Philadelphia, Pennsylvania...ARRRRRRRRRRE YYYOUUUUUUUUUU RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREADYYYYYYYYYYYYY????? *crowd cheers louder* BUFFER Then for the thousands in attendance here in Philadelphia, and the millions and millions watching around the world...there's only one thing left to say. Ladies and gentlemen...LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLET'S GET RRRRRRRRRRRRREADY TO RRRRRRRRRRRRRUMMMMMMMBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! Magnum Opus hits, and Alfdogg gets a mixed reaction when he comes through the curtains. COLE And as Michael Buffer said, a first-time ever matchup we're about to see right here! BUFFER Coming to the ring at this time...weighing in at 237 1/2 pounds! One of the most decorated stars in the history of this company...and tonight, he looks to take one step further in his ascent back to the top of the mountain. Ladies and gentlemen...the leader of the Deadly Alliance...a former two-time OAOAST heavyweight champion of the WORRRRRRRRRRRRRRLD...ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLFFFFFFFFFFFDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOGG!!!!! COLE Alf defeating The Lone Star Gunslinger, Baron Windels, in the first round, for the right to face Bo here tonight, a Deadly Alliance vs In Crowd showdown! COACH That's right, Cole, and there's a lot of tension building between all these groups, all thinking that they lay claim to being the dominant force in the business! Alf slides into the ring and poses on the buckles, drawing a mixed reaction. *BbwWbAhmotherfuckerLlIiiBbbEErRrAATtTeeyYyOUUurRrMmmMmMiIInNnDddDd!!* plays, and the crowd goes crazy for Bohemoth as he strolls through the curtain. BUFFER His opponent...hailing from Greenville, South Carolina, and weighing in at 284 pounds! One of the most physically dominant, and fastest-rising stars in the business today. Ladies and gentlemen...representing The In Crowd...he is the "Metrosexual Monster"...BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEMOTHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! COLE And we mentioned that Alf defeated Baron Windels to get to this point, Bohemoth had to go through Baron's former partner, Mr. Dick, Jock Mulligan! COACH Yeah, thanks in part to Baron himself, I might add! Bo stalks to the ring, and hops onto the apron, then climbs inside. He hops from side to side while staring across the ring at Alf, who is being checked by the referee. He then makes his way over to check Bo, before calling for the bell. *DING DING DING* Alf talks trash to Bo as both men make their way to mid-ring, and stare one another down. Alf gives Bo a shove, and Bo returns with a bigger shove, sending Alf all the way into the ropes! COLE And Bo right away showing some power, and some intimidation tactics! COACH Nah, they're not intimidation tactics to Alf! He's been in there with competitors of all shapes and sizes! Alf moves in, and the two tie up. Bo grabs a side headlock, and Alf backs him into the ropes and shoves him across. Alf drops down, then leapfrogs Bo, but Bo comes back with a shouldercheck which knocks Alf off his feet and all the way to the floor! COLE BIG shoulderblock from Bohemoth, and Alf to the outside early! Alf walks around the side of the ring, and climbs onto the apron, as the crowd begins some conflicting chants. "LET'S GO ALF~! "LET'S GO BO~!" "LET'S GO ALF~!" "LET'S GO BO~!" Alf steps in, and ties up with Bo once again. This time Alf takes him down with a side headlock! COLE Nice move by Alf! Bo reaches up and grabs him in a headscissors, but Alf KIPS UP~! to escape, then catches him with another takedown! Bo tries another headscissors, but this time Alf evades it and cinches in on the headlock. COACH And Alf sticking to wrestling now, and he's got a clear advantage in that department, you've got to say! Bo works his way to his feet, and shoves Alf across, then goes for a PRESS SLAM~!, but Alf slips behind, and rolls up Bo in a reverse sunset! 1... 2... Kickout! Bo comes for Alf, but gets rolled up in a small package! 1... 2... Kickout! Alf catches Bo in another side headlock takedown! COACH And Alf taking Bo to school here early on, Cole! COLE Bo's gonna have a hard time if he tries to match up with Alf technically, no question about it, but there's still a long way to go in this match! Bo tries to get to his feet, but Alf pulls on the headlock...until Bo slips out, and applies a hammerlock! COLE But look at that nice escape! Bo drops some knees on the arm, before Alf works to his feet. Alf catches Bo square in the chops with an elbow! COLE Oh, Bo caught one right in the mush! Alf then wrings the arm of Bo, and hammers away on the shoulder until the big man goes down to his knees. Alf then stands over Bo, and paintbrushes him, to the delight of some, to the dismay of others in the crowd. COLE But Alf may be making a mistake here! Bo gets a foot under himself, then rolls forward onto his back, then kicks his feet up into Alf's face! COLE And a nice counter by Bo! Alf holds his face, as Bo gets to his feet and floors him with a clothesline! Bo then bars the arm of Alf, and returns the favor with a paintbrush of his own! COLE And Bo with a little measure of revenge for Alf's taunting! Alf gets to his feet and takes a swing at Bo, who ducks and lets Alf do a full spin around, then trips him up by the legs! COLE Slingshot coming up here! Bo slingshots Alf into the top buckle! Alf staggers out, and Bo wrings his arm. Bo then grabs Alf under the shoulder, and lifts him into the air, still holding the arm-wringer, slamming him down on his back! COACH Whoa! COLE Devastating move right there from Bo, who knows what that could have done to Alf's arm! Alf shakes the arm as he gets to his feet, but Bo grabs it once again. Alf scoops up Bo and slams him to the mat...but Bo holds onto the arm and rolls through! COLE And look at that! Bo takes the slam, and still holds onto the armbar! Alf works his way to this feet, then backs Bo into the ropes, and whips him across. Alf drops down, then catches Bo with a AA SPINEBUSTER~! COLE Wow, and that's a big man to execute that move on! Most impressive by Alf! Alf comes to his knees and wipes the sweat from his brow, then gets to his feet, and drops a snap legdrop! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Alf picks up Bo, and executes a backbreaker! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COACH Alf going for quick falls here, looking to make the big man expend energy by kicking out! Alf gets to his feet and drives an elbow into Bo, then picks him up and sets him up in the corner, and delivers a CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! And another! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! However, this one doesn't seem to affect Bo! Alf backs off a couple steps, then delivers two quick CHOPS~!, before Bo delivers a kick to the gut, and turns him around in the corner, firing off right hands and forearms! COLE And Alf with those knife-edges only got the big man fired up! Bo whips Alf across, and charges...but Alf gets his foot up! Alf then climbs to the top, but Bo recovers in time to catch him up there, and tosses him back into the ring! COLE Bo took the hit and came right back to avoid that high-risk attempt by Alf! Bo then follows suit, and climbs to the top himself! COLE And look at this, Bo going for a high-risk move here! However, this time Alf gets to his feet too quick, and leaps onto the ropes, causing Bo to crotch himself! COACH He took too long though, Cole! You can't take your time going for those moves! Bo starts to fall forward, but Alf pushes him back up, then climbs up himself. He climbs all the way to the top, and takes Bo down with a HURRICANRANA~! COLE Big move! This could do it! Alf scoots over and covers... 1... 2... NO! Shoulder up! COLE But no! Bo just does escape! Alf vents to the referee, who re-affirms that it was only a two-count. Alf then stomps Bo until Bo rolls to the floor. He waits for Bo to get to his feet, and hits him with a SOMERSAULT PLANCHA~! COLE Alf going for it all here against the big man from the In Crowd! Alf poses, drawing another mixed reaction, then rolls Bo back inside. Alf arrogantly hits Bo with some jabs, then takes a step back, and hits him with a dropkick! COACH Alf in total control here, Cole, it could be just a matter of time! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Alf picks up Bo, and executes a fisherman's suplex! 1... 2... Kickout! Alf then starts to deliver some more jabs, until Bo ducks one, and rolls Alf up in a backslide! 1... 2... Kickout! COLE And Bo almost snuck away with it right there! Alf rolls through to his feet, then floors Bo with a SUPERKICK~! when he gets to his feet! Cover... 1... 2... Shoulder up! Alf waits for Bo to get to his feet, then takes him over with a BELLY-TO-BELLY~! COLE And Alf starting to set up Bo for what he hopes will be the big finish! Alf waits again, then pulls Bo up from his knees and executes a T-BONE SUPLEX~!! He picks up Bo once again, but when he tries to lift him into his shoulders, Bo slides down his back, and starts to deliver right hands! COLE And look at Bo fight back after taking those suplexes! Bo sets up an Irish whip, but Alf reverses. Bo ducks a clothesline, but gets caught in a sleeper! COACH G'night, Bo! Alf climbs onto the back of Bo, leaning his weight in, and eventually forcing him to his knees and down to the mat. As Bo fades, the referee lifts his arm... 1!!! 2!!! ...but Bo holds through on the third lift! COLE Bo not done yet! Bo makes his way to his feet, and backs into the buckles with Alf! Bo is dazed as he walks out of the corner, but Alf is able to recover quickly, and jumps back on, applying the hold again! COACH How about that? Alf got sandwiched in the corner, and was able to come right back and go back to the hold! This time, however, Bo won't be forced down. Instead, he delivers three elbows to the midsection to loosen the hold, then follows with a SPINEBUSTER~! COLE And Bo finally able to pull off a big move! Both men are down, and the referee begins a count... 1!!! 2!!! 3!!! 4!!! 5!!! 6!!! 7!!! 8!!! Bo sits up, and turns to his side, as Alf starts to stir himself. Both men make it to their feet around the same time, and start to exchange blows! Bo gets the better of the exchange, but Alf goes to the eyes, then attempts an Irish whip, but Bo reverses...and catches Alf with a PRESS SLAM~! COLE Big show of strength from Bo, even after all the punishment he's taken! Bo lets out a big yell, to signify that he's ready to take control! COLE And Alf may be in some trouble now! Bo picks up Alf, and whips him into the corner. Alf staggers out, and Bo catches him with a clothesline! He then backs into the ropes, and floors him with another! He runs to the ropes, and delivers a third! Cover... 1... 2... Shoulder up! Bo picks up Alf, and whips him HARD chest-first into the buckles! COACH DAY-UM! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Shoulder up! Bo then lifts Alf for another PRESS SLAM~!, this time dropping him crotch-first on the ropes! COACH Now that should be a DQ right there! COLE Why's that? COACH How is that any different than low-blowing a guy with you arm or foot? COLE srsly, when was the last time someone was DQ'ed for that? Bo then sets up Alf in a standing headscissors. He signals to the crowd, then lifts Alf up...but Alf is able to slip out in front, then trips up Bo, and locks in the SHARPSHOOTER~!!!!!11111 COACH OH YEAH! COLE Sharpshooter applied by Alf, and this is what did in Baron in the first round! Alf sits back in the hold, as Bo grimaces in pain, but is close to the ropes...until Alf pulls him out to the center! COLE And right out in the middle now! Bo lets out a yell, as he puts his hands under him, and moves towards the ropes again. Desperately, Bo manages to crawl over and reach the bottom rope! The ref forces Alf to break, which he does after a four-count. Alf picks up Bo, and sets up an Irish whip.. However, Bo blocks, and pulls Alf in for a MURDERLINE~! COLE And a big lariat from Bo, and he's right back on top! What a match this is! Bo signals for the end, as Alf scoots toward a corner. As Bo goes to pick Alf up, he sees Thunderkid rushing down to ringside! COLE And here come the troops for Alf! Bo knocks TK off the apron, then catches Reject with a big boot as he comes at him with a steel chair raised. However, as all this is going on, Sandman9000 slips his barbed wire bat to Alf! COLE Oh no, Alf's got that bat from Sandman! Bo makes his way back over to Alf, as the referee tries to usher Reject out of the ring. COLE Turn around, referee! As Bo grabs Alf, Alf jams the bat into the crotch of Bo! As Bo doubles over in pain, Alf gets to his feet, and holding the bat on the handle and at the end of the barrel, smashes it into Bo's head! COLE Alf with that barbed wire bat behind the referee's back, and Bo has been busted open here! Alf tosses the bat to the outside, then heads to the top rope, gets his balance...and hits the FIVE-STAR ALF SPLASH~!!!!!11111 COLE And there's the splash! 1... 2... 3!!! *DING DING DING* COLE And Alf has stolen this quarterfinal match! BUFFER The winner of the match, advancing to the semifinals of the Money in the Bank tournament...ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLFFFFFFFFFFFDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGG!!!!! COACH Score one for the Deadly Alliance, Cole! And now, look at the matchup in store for the semis! COLE Indeed, Alf will take on Landon Maddix, the head of Cucharacha International, in yet another first-time ever meeting! As Alf rolls out of the ring in front of the announce position, Reject rolls back inside with the chair. COLE Oh no, Reject's in the ring, Coach. Bo is just starting to stir, as Reject opens up the chair, and places it around his head and neck! COLE Oh no, not this! Somebody get down there! As Reject climbs to the top rope, Sly Sommers slides into the ring, armed with a chair of his own, with Zack Malibu and Leon Rodez bringing up the rear. COLE And thank God for The In Crowd, Reject was going to try to snap the neck of the big man with that steel chair! Reject hops to the floor, and helps Alf up, as the DA makes their way around the ring to the aisle. TK and Reject raise the arms of Alf, as Sandman stands in the background, the In Crowd staring them down all the way, as Bohemoth gets to his feet in the ring. COLE The Deadly Alliance wreaking havoc tonight, but The In Crowd puts a stop to that injustice! But they can't put a stop to Alf moving on to the semifinals, and that's just what will happen, as he's set to take on Landon! Let's go to...
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Cut backstage, where Alfdogg, Sandman9000, and Thunderkid sit in the locker room. ALF Can you believe that interview guy, trying to knock me on my heels with the whole In-Crowd intro for Bohemoth? Who cares? Just one more faction that has to fall. At that point, Reject walks in, sporting a new buzz-cut look, and sits down without a word. ALF So where have you been all week? Nobody's seen you since last Thursday. REJECT I've been thinking. ALF Oh, about Maggie? REJECT As a matter of fact, yes. Alf rolls his eyes. REJECT Don't get the wrong idea. These aren't friendly thoughts anymore. Reject clenches his title belt in his hands as he stares into it, a look of anger on his face. REJECT No, instead I've been thinking about everything that's gone down over the last month...about her lies...her false gratitude...she really did say those things about me. And I believed her! She played me for a fool. And that's all that's been on my mind for the last week. All her lies, the way she played with my emotions, the way she USED me to get at Leon. She USED ME! Reject stands up and grabs his chair by one leg with one hand, and lets out an angry yell as he rockets it across the locker room, right into the large-screen plasma TV, sending sparks about. Alf and TK sit up in their chairs, looking on in astonishment. REJECT I got USED. And someone is going to pay for it tonight. Reject storms out of the locker room, as the rest of the DA looks on, with Alf cracking a smile, then looking back at TK, who shakes his head. TK I was watching that. *cut to Sofa Central* COLE Wow, what can you say about that? COACH All I can say, I feel for the poor sucker who crosses the R-Man tonight. I've never seen him like that, Cole, ever. COMMERCIAL "If you are what you say you are A superstar Then have no fear The camera's here and the microphones and they wanna know Oh oh oh yeah" by Lupe Fiasco plays as Molly Nerdly backpedals through the curtains, filming the entrance of Simon Singleton on the Siclopse. COLE And we're ready for a triple threat match, featuring half of the participants in the newly-announced TLC match at AngleSlam! Let's to to Michael Buffer! BUFFER The following is a triple threat match, scheduled for one fall! Making his way to the ring, accompanied by Molly Nerdly...from Beverly Hills, California, weighing in at 225 pounds...representing the Beverly Hills Blonds, and the Enterprise...SSSSSSSSSSSSSSIMOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSINGLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEETOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!! Simon poses in the ring, as Makes Me Wonder hits, and the crowd comes to its feet for Jade Rodez and Tyler Bryant. BUFFER Accompanied to the ring by Jade Rodez...from Auburn Hills, Michigan, weighing in at 196 pounds...one half of D*LUX, TYYYYLERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN NNT!!!!! COLE And of course, last week, D*LUX fought the Beverly Hills Blonds to a double-disqualification in a match that was supposed to determine the #1 contender to the World tag team titles, which led to tonight's match being set up as well as a TLC match for the titles at AngleSlam! Tyler poses on the buckles, drawing applause from the fans, as hits. The arena goes dark, and the entryway fills up with yellow strobes and smoke, as Thunderkid walks through the smoke, getting a mixed reaction, mostly cheers. COLE Lots of Deadly Alliance fans in the house as TK makes his way out! BUFFER And from Green Bay, Wisconsin, weighing in at 250 pounds...representing the Deadly Alliance, he is one half of the OAOAST World tag team champions...THHHHHHHHHHHHHUNDERKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIIIIIIID!!!!! COLE TK looks ready for this match, but how about the words and the actions of Reject tonight? COACH Well, this can be only be good for the Deadly Alliance, Cole! I mean, we all know Alf's a tough guy, Sandman is obviously a tough guy, TK's a tough guy...but Reject, a little more laid back than the others, maybe doesn't have that same killer instict! And from a mental standpoint...as much as I hate to say this about the R-Man, he may be kind of the weak link in that regard. But maybe that ends tonight. TK walks down the aisle intently, then starts talking trash to Tyler from the floor, which opens up Tyler for a sneak attack from Simon! COLE And Simon from behind attacking Tyler! TK comes and stands at the apron, as Simon sets up an Irish whip, but Tyler reverses. Tyler drops down, then leapfrogs Simon, then catches him with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker! COLE Nice backbreaker by Tyler, as TK has yet to enter the ring! Tyler whips Simon into the corner, and charges, but catches a foot to the face! Simon then goes for a clothesline, but Tyler ducks, then runs to the ropes and catches him with a flying back elbow! At this point, TK slides into the ring and levels Tyler from behind! *DING DING DING* COLE And now the match officially under way! TK then stomps away on Simon, and comes back to hammer Tyler on the back. TK then picks up Simon and sets him on the buckles, climbing up after him, but Tyler yanks TK down and starts to go up himself. TK comes back, and lifts Tyler out on his shoulders, as Simon steps to the top. COACH Look at this double team! Simon goes for a clothesline, but Tyler rolls forward, causing him to miss, and attempts to roll up TK! However, TK blocks the attempt, then lifts Tyler up and slams him on top of Simon! The referee counts... 1... 2... TK pulls Tyler off, and covers... 1... 2... Tyler pulls TK off! TK shrugs Tyler off, and hooks Simon in a front facelock. Reluctantly, it seems, Tyler follows suit. COLE And now a double suplex coming up! Tyler and TK lift Simon in the air, but Simon uses his leg action to bring himself back down, and counter in one motion with a DOUBLE DDT~! COACH But what a counter by Simon! Simon stops for a second to pose, then covers both men. 1... 2... TK and Tyler easily push Simon off. Simon picks up Tyler, and sets up an Irish whip. Tyler reverses, but Simon slides under the legs, and hits him with a CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! He then hits TK with a CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Another for Tyler! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Another for TK! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! COACH Look at Simon go! Simon whips Tyler into TK. Tyler rolls forward, with his shoulders landing at TK's waist, and rolls up his body, ending up in a hurricanrana position! TK holds onto Tyler as he absorbs a few rights, then Simon approaches, and TK flips Tyler off onto Simon's shoulder. Simon kicks TK in the gut, then attempts a Snake Eyes on Tyler, but Tyler slips behind the back, and shoves Simon into the corner! Simon staggers out, and gets caught in a drop toe hold! Simon gets to his feet and staggers into TK, who lifts him for a PRESS SLAM~! COLE TK with Simon high in the air! TK tosses Simon on top of Tyler! The referee counts... 1... 2... TK pulls Simon off, then whips him into the ropes, and tosses him into the air, letting him drop to the mat! COLE TK in control of things at the moment! Tyler then charges TK, who catches him in a gutwrench, but Tyler spins through and takes him down with a headscissors! COLE But Tyler with a nice counter there! Cover... 1... 2... Shoulder up! Tyler lays for a second, then covers Simon... 1... 2... Shoulder up! Simon then drapes an arm over TK... 1... 2... Shoulder up! COLE And guys are starting to get spent now! Simon gets to his feet first, then lets TK get to his feet, and clotheslines him to the floor! COACH Well, one guy is on the floor, now let's see if one of these guys can put the other away! Simon hammers on Tyler, then whips him into the ropes, and goes for a leapfrog, but Tyler hooks the ropes, then, as Simon charges, backdrops him over the ropes on top of TK on the floor! COLE Right down on top of TK goes Simon Singleton! Tyler then signals to the crowd, before running to the ropes and performing a SUICIDE DIVE onto both guys on the floor! Tyler raises his hands for the fans, getting a round of applause in return. COLE Big move from Tyler Bryant of D*LUX! Tyler then grabs Simon and tosses him inside, then climbs to the top, and hits him with a flying bodypress! 1... 2... NO! Simon kicks out! Tyler then picks up Simon and sets up an Irish whip, but Simon reverses, and goes for a slam. Tyler slips behind, but gets caught with a foot to the gut, followed by a swinging neckbreaker! COLE And Simon looking to pick up the win! 1... 2... TK saves! COACH TK in there just in time! TK picks up Simon, and lifts him in a gutwrench, executing a SITOUT POWERBOMB~! 1... 2... Tyler saves! COLE Big powerbomb from TK, that may have done it if not for Tyler making the save! Tyler waits for Simon to get to his feet, then charges him, hitting him with a SPEAR~!, causing both men to fall through the ropes to the floor! As Tyler slugs away at Simon, TK steps through the ropes, and climbs to the top...hitting both men with a MOONSAULT~! COLE TK going for it all, and he got it! TK slowly gets to his feet, to the delight of the pro-DA fans in attendance. He tosses Tyler back inside, and signals for the end. COACH TK says it's over, Cole! About this time, Simon gets to his feet on the outside...when a chair comes flying into camera view, smacking him on the back of the head! The camera pans over to reveal Reject as the aggressor, staring down on Simon! COLE Reject is here! COACH Reject said someone was going to pay, looks like it's going to happen in this match! However, the referee is still focused on the ring, where TK has Tyler set up in a front facelock, when Jade Rodez hops onto the apron! COACH Get her down, ref! TK looks over at Jade, then drops Tyler to the mat and stalks to the apron. COLE And Jade had better get down now! Jade points the finger in the face of TK, who grabs Jade by the wrist, then pulls her in and plants a big kiss on her! COACH Can you believe this? Jade just kissed TK! Bitches'll go to any lengths to get the winner's purse! COLE Jade responds with a SLAP to TK's face! COLE She didn't kiss him that time! Upon seeing this, Reject slides into the ring and grabs Jade by the hair, yanking her in over the top rope! COLE And look at this, Reject manhandling Jade Rodez! Give me a break! Jade holds her hair as she gets to her feet, and backs away from Reject, but backs right into TK, who pulls his fist back, causing her to fall to the mat, at which point Reject grabs her legs and starts to apply the R-LOCK! COLE Oh, no, don't do this! Reject turns Jade over and locks in the hold! Jade immediately begins to tap, until Tyler flies in with a clothesline to Reject! COLE And thank God, Tyler Bryant breaks it up! Jade rolls out of the ring, and retreats to the locker room, as TK hits Tyler with a BICYCLE KICK, then Reject and TK lay the boots to him as the referee calls for the bell. *DING DING DING* COLE And this match has been thrown out, as thankfully Jade wasn't in that hold long enough to inflict any serious harm on her! Reject then grabs the chair, and gives the same angry stare into it that he gave in the locker room. COACH Uh-oh...this doesn't look good. Reject raises the chair up, and SLAMS it into the leg of Tyler! He continues, going all Steve Austin at WM X-7 vs the Rock on Tyler's leg, then drops the chair outside as if nothing had happened. At this point, Simon drags himself into the ring, but is stomped by Reject. Reject then signals for TK to set up Simon. As TK picks up Simon, the referee approaches Reject, and gets dropped with the EULOGY~!!!!!11111 COLE And now he's assaulted a referee! Somebody's got to stop Reject! TK drapes Simon's left arm over the top rope, then pushes him against the ropes with his foot and extends his right arm out. Reject then climbs to the top rope. COACH Oh, this is an old Ole & Arn trick! COLE They could break the arm with this, dislocate the shoulder, who knows! However, Molly Nerdly jumps onto the apron, and uses all her strength to shove Reject off the top rope! COLE Molly just shoved Reject off the top rope, can you believe that? COACH No, she didn't! She was up there tryin' to cop a feel on the R-Man, and it just startled him, he fell off! Reject quickly gets to his feet, and locks eyes with Molly, who has just realized what she's done. COACH See, he's fine! COLE Yeah, but what about Molly? TK grabs Molly by the arm and drags her through the ropes, as Reject approaches her. Reject then nods at TK...who picks up Molly in a hangman's hold! COLE Oh no, not this! COACH OK...I gotta admit now, this is going a little far. Reject gives one last stomp to Simon, then turns around and does the "sizing her up" hand gesture, then backs up... COLE Oh no... ...and LAYS A ROUNDHOUSE KICK INTO THE ABDOMEN OF MOLLY NERDLY!!! COLE OH MY GOD. Molly drops to the mat and turns to her side, holding her ribs while screaming and sobbing uncontrollably. COLE Get some EMTs down there, RIGHT NOW. Reject walks over to the main camera and gives an evil stare. COLE Yeah, you feel better now, after injuring a defenseless woman? COACH I'm just...I don't know what to say about this. COLE I'll tell you what, Jock Mulligan may be Mr. Dick, but he's got to share that title with Reject tonight! Reject runs a hand over his head slowly, then looks down at Molly, then up at TK, who smiles. REJECT Do it again. COACH Did you hear that, Cole, Reject just told TK to do it again! COLE Oh no, is there anyone in the back to stop this??? ANYONE? TK picks up Molly again, and Reject measures her, then slides out, as he sees Ned Blanchard, the Heavenly Rockers and CPA sprinting down the aisle. TK drops Molly and slides out, as well, and he and Reject retreat through the crowd. Ned tends to Molly, as CPA and the HRs stare down TK and Reject. COLE And who knows what that nut would have done to Molly had the Enterprise not hit the ring! COACH Well...Reject said someone was going to pay tonight, but I had no idea that he would stoop to something like this, Cole. COLE Somebody needs to...this guy needs to be in a padded cell somewhere, not in a 20,000 person arena. Simon is near tears in the ring as he tends to Molly, whose screams of pain have yet to subside, as the EMTs come down the aisle with a stretcher. COLE OK, I understand Josh is actually going to try an interview here...Josh, you're a braver man than me, that's all I can say. JOSH Michael, everyone in the arena is in a state of shock at what just happened out here, and I am certainly no exception...Reject, what are you doing out there? REJECT I did exactly what I said I was going to do, Josh. I said I was going to make someone pay, and I did. That doesn't go for just wrestlers...that goes for managers, that goes for valets, that goes for the fans...that goes for announcers (ominous stare at Josh)...anyone stupid enough to get in my way. JOSH I just don't understand, Reject...I mean, it's like you're a different person. What's going on? REJECT You know what...you're exactly right. You know, the people who have watched me over my career, have seen Mr. Laid-Back, Down-to-Earth, Ladies' Man Reject. Try to help a woman...and I use that term loosely...with her problems, and what happens? They use you. They walk all over you. Well, it's never going to happen again, because the old Reject...the Ladies' Man, laid-back, down-to-earth, shoulder-to-cry-on...from this point on, he's DEAD. Reject pauses for a second, then grabs Josh by the shirt collar and presses him against a wall. REJECT YOU HEAR ME, JOSH? HE'S DEAD! DEAD! Reject puts Josh down on the floor, still holding his shirt with his right hand, and grabs his microphone with his left hand. REJECT Take a good, long look, Philly. You're looking at a brand new R-Man. From this point forward, I look out for ME, and I look out for the Deadly Alliance. And as little Polly Purebred out there found out tonight...crossing the R...(stares at Josh)...won't get you far. Reject releases his grip on Josh, and walks away. COLE What a disgusting, demented motherf... COACH Shut yo mouth. The EMTs are loading Molly onto the stretcher, as she still writhes in pain. Simon can be heard saying "you gotta hold still, Molly!" as the EMTs make their way to the back. COLE This is a very unfortunate scene...the Enterprise may not be fan favorites, but to see a woman, especially one like Molly Nerdly, who's not a wrestler, who's not an athlete...get assaulted like this, unprovoked, just makes me absolutely sick to my stomach. To Philadelphia's credit, many of the fans who cheered Thunderkid and Reject have changed their minds after this incident, but to those who continue to cheer their actions such as this, well, they make me sick, too. Let's go...let's just go somewhere. I need a break. COMMERCIAL
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OAOAST HeldDOWN is brought to you by... Pineapple Express-In Theatre's Now! Geico-15 Minutes Could Save You 15 Percent or More on Car Insurance * BANG * * BANG * The loud explosion startles fans, but it’s back to normal when a cloud of purple haze is released, bringing them to their feet as the CHRIST AIR EXPRESS burst out on the stage to the tune of “Rise Against“ by Like the Angels. COLE Talk about kicking things off with a bang. Wow! COACH I can barely hear myself think. COLE YOU’RE AN ASSHOLE! COACH What?! COLE I said what a match-up this should be. Instead of getting booed out of the building like they would’ve been 6 months ago, the CAE are cheered wildly. A sign their new stoner lifestyle has done wonders for their popularity. BUFFER The following special challenge match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, hailing from Laguna Beach, California, and weighing 185 pounds soaking wet, one-half of the wildly popular Christ Air Express… MMMMEEEELLLL!!! “YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" The CAE flash the RAWK~! sign to let the fans know of their appreciation. COLE The brothers from Laguna Beach receiving love from the City of Brotherly Love, which is no easy feat. COACH It ain’t gonna get any easier for MEL tonight, that’s for sure. I can’t believe that idiot had the balls to challenge him. What happened at the Big Apple Spectacular was between Mr. Dick and Baron Windels. He’s got nothing to do with it. COLE Baron’s a good friend of the Christ Air Express and their sister Melody, who’s still his manager I might add. COACH Yeah, and to Baron’s credit he hasn’t interfered in her affairs -- all 100 of them! “My Dick” hits and Mr. Dick isn‘t just showered with boos, golden pyro rains down on him from the ceiling! The Cocky Prick solo as depending on where this is placed Malaysia is preparing for her match, reeling from her defeat or enjoying a little R&R after a good workout. BUFFER His opponent, from San Antonio, Texas, weighing 242 pounds… MMMISSSSSSSSTEEEEEERRRRR DICK! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!” Mr. Dick enters the ring, tosses his glittery cowboy hat aside and tells MEL to bring it. MARV high fives his brother and exits. COACH How fair is this? You don’t see Malaysia ringside. Why should MARV be allowed to stay? I seriously doubt he has a manager’s license. COLE Obviously referee Clem Buzzlefoxer has deemed MARV is no risk to interfere. COACH Now that I think about it, old man Buzzlefoxer is right. MARV is no threat to Mr. Dick. Just look at ‘em. Mr. Dick would squash him like a bug. * DINGDINGDING * The bell sounds and both men lockup mid-ring. Mr. Dick goes behind and takes MEL down to the mat with a waistlock, then paintbrushes him to the cheers of a vocal minority. All too used to this kind of bullying MEL has a few choice words for the Cocky Prick. Mr. Dick backs off…then shoves MEL to the mat and drops an elbow, but nobody’s home! “YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" MEL grabs a side headlock and quickly is shot off, decked by a standing dropkick on the rebound. Rammed into the buckle MEL is then hammered in the corner. Whipped out he ducks a clothesline and returns with a flying head scissors, followed by a dropkick and VICTORY ROLL! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Both rush to their feet and Mr. Dick lands a kick. He fires MEL across and drives the knee… NO, MEL ROLLS HIM UP IN A SCHOOL BOY! COLE Oh, what a counter! ONE… TWO… THR-- KICKOUT! On the wrong end of a side headlock takeover, Mr. Dick raises his shoulder off the mat to prevent an accidental pin. Trapped square in the middle of the ring, he rolls MEL onto his back in a cradle! ONE… TWO… And only two, as MEL regains his position. Mr. Dick returns to a vertical base and executes a back suplex to break free. After being violently reintroduced to the turnbuckle MEL reverses an Irish whip and delivers a BAAAAAAAACK BODY DROP! “YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" The crowd ROARS as MEL signals for one of his signature moves, MELANOMA…but when he scoops Mr. Dick up the Cocky Prick floats over and spikes him into the canvas with PURE PENETRATION!! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Reverse chinlock is applied and MEL begins kicking and screaming as Mr. Dick holds onto the bottom rope with his legs for extra leverage, drawing the ire of MARV and fans alike. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!” COACH Why all the whining, Cole? Don’t the people see MARV trying to incriminate Mr. Dick by shaking the ropes? COLE “LET’S GO MEL!” “LET’S GO MEL!” “LET’S GO MEL!” The adrenaline flowing and the blood pumping MEL starts his comeback, fighting out of the now side headlock with a series of elbows to the gut, but it’s short-lived however, as Mr. Dick rakes the eyes and goes back to the chinlock following a snap mare. COLE MEL just can’t catch a break right now. What a beating he’s sustained the last few minutes. COACH Similar to the one Baron Windels will receive Sunday night, August 31 at Angleslam. MEL wraps his hands around Mr. Dick’s head and sits down with a JAWBREAKER! “YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Mr. Dick staggers into a SPINNING HEEL KICK and is covered! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! MEL wrings the arm for the NOSEPLANT…but Mr. Dick answers with an INVERTED ATOMIC DROP and CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL!! COLE The Cock Shock! COACH Clem doesn’t even need to bother making the count, just ring the bell. The cover. ONE… TWO… THR-- KICKOUT! “YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE What heart being displayed by MEL here tonight. Win or lose, he can be proud of his performance. COACH There’s no such thing as moral victories in wrestling, Mikey. Sent for the ride, MEL leaps onto the middle turnbuckle and fakes a diving cross body block, causing Mr. Dick to drop down. When he pops back up MEL connects with a MISSLE DROPKICK! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Fired up, MEL unloads with a series of overhand chops. Mr. Dick reverses and Irish whip…and MEL spikes him with a SWINGING BULLDOG! ONE… TWO… THR-- NO! Slammed near the corner Mr. Dick gets the KNEES up as MEL comes down with the SHOOTING STAR PRESS, then dumps him through the ropes into MARV to add insult to injury! “OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” COLE What a cheap shot! COACH I’d say. If MEL has beef with MARV he should handle it privately and not in front of the cameras. COLE Mr. Dick tosses MEL back in for THE COCK BLOCK! ONE… TWO… THREE!!! * DINGDINGDINGDING * BUFFER Here is your winner… MMMISSSSSSSSTEEEEEERRRRR DICK! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!” Though the match is over, Mr. Dick isn’t done yet. He lays into MEL some more, knocking MARV off the apron as he tries to help his big brother. “YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Like they had his back a few weeks ago, BARON WINDELS has the Christ Air Express’. With a BULLROPE in his possession, the Lone Star Gunslinger blindsides his former partner with the attached COWBELL, slicing Mr. Dick open! COACH You wanna talk about a cheap shot. There was a cheap shot. Clem Buzzlefoxer attempts to restrain Baron, but the look in his eyes makes him think better of it. Pleading for mercy in the corner, a bloody Mr. Dick receives none and is HUNG OVER THE TOP ROPE!!! COLE Baron Windels has snapped! COACH He ought to be fined and suspended, Cole. You can kill a man this way. Not even the CAE can pry BW off Mr. Dick. More OAOAST officials rush out from the back to gain control of the situation, but Baron’s a man possessed. It’s only until MALAYSIA appears that BW releases Mr. Dick…and that’s so he can invite her in to fight! Officials and the CAE intervene before it can reach that point. Mr. Dick helped backstage by Malaysia. COLE Oh, man. We desperately need to take a break after that. There’s nothing more I can say about what just took place. We’ll be back. COMMERCIAL
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Josh Matthews is standing backstage with Alfdogg, who gets a mixture of cheers and boos. JOSH Thanks, Michael, joining me right now, the leader of the Deadly Alliance, former two-time World heavyweight champion Alfdogg, who later tonight continues his effort to earn another shot at that title when, in a Money In the Bank quarterfinal match, he squares off for the first time ever against Bohemoth, who as we found out last week, now represents the In Crowd! ALF (looks down at Josh) Oh, you say that like I'm just supposed to be scared! The In Crowd is back, oh no! Watch out, other units! I'm not worried about that at all, Josh. You see, this...is Philadelphia. This is a Deadly Alliance town! The camera pans the crowd, as there is a loud cheering section for the DA, with some fans tugging on their Deadly Alliance shirts as the camera passes them. ALF What better place than the Land of Extreme, for the Deadly Alliance to establish its dominance? And that's just what we're going to do tonight. You see, the Deadly Alliance, like it or not, represents tradition. We're not some mamby-pamby mongrol stable thrown together to keep up with the trends. And we will show the In Crowd and any other stable that gets in our way, their place. *mixed reaction* ALF Now then. Bohemoth, you may be a big, bad man, but I've taken out bigger, badder and manlier in my time here, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna let some second-rate Miami Vice musclehead get in the way of my becoming a three-time World champion. You're gonna wish you were "insignificant" after tonight, back carrying around Christian Wright's luggage. That's all I got to say, little ma... Alf trails off at the sound of the approaching chatter of LANDON MADDIX and MEGAN SKYE, Landon in celebratory mood. MADDIX Ah-ha-HAA! Put out the word, La Cucaracha is back in business baby! ALF I'm sure I speak on behalf of everyone when I say "it's better late than never". MADDIX Oh, Alf, you know you always were... something. Apparantly. Anyway, just wanted to wish your luck in your match tonight. Now you know what's awaiting around the corner you've got something to aim for. And I know this isn't technically the politically correct thing to say but honestly, I quite fancy the prospect of facing you next round. Should be fun. So, not that you need it I'm sure, but good luck out there. And... uh... just incase, my boys have got your back. Say no more. A winkwink and a nudgenudge earns a chuckle from Alf. ALF I get it. Anything to get Bohemoth out of the tournament, right? MADDIX Well, you know. ALF Yeah I know. The two share a laugh, but Alf's fades away long before Landon's has which unnerves him a little. ALF So, basically, you and your merry band of international misfits would be willing to lend a hand if it means avoiding Bohemoth, to get the EASY option, that being facing me? MADDIX Yes sir. ALF I see. Landon, let me impart a little saying on you. Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it. Incase your OAOAST For Dummies didn't clear it up for you, I'm a three-time World Heavyweight Champion. An OAOAST Original. Leader of THE dominant force in the OAOAST, The Deadly Alliance. The World Tag Team Champions? The Heartland Champion? You might remember him from when your... *scoffs* Six Man Champions lost him the Match Of Champions a few months back. MADDIX Rough looking guy wrapped in bandages? ALF ...yeah, that's the one. Point is, you and your cronies should save your energy because me facing you in the semi-finals is not something you want to happen. Trust me, Bohemoth should be the last of your worries looking at those tournament brackets. Tonight, I'm going to outclass that shaved ape and give him a wrestling lesson he'll never forget. And when you watch me expose him for the glorified bodyguard he really is, take a look at him laying on that mat, beaten and embarrassed... Getting a little shifty, Landon starts scratching at his neck, not sure whether to warn Alf or not about the fact that BOHEMOTH has crept up behind him! The Meterosexual Monster listens with a smirk on his face, taking off his orange-tinted sunglasses and clipping them to the collar of his suit jacket. ALF ...take a long look and you'll be wishing that you'd given Bohemoth a little helping hand. Because he's the one who'll be needing it, not me pal. BOHEMOTH Is that so? Alf just about jumps out of his skin and turns around in a split-second. Luckily for him, Bo seems relatively amused still. BOHEMOTH Funny. The way I see it, with you all bickering like a couple of schoolkids... I'm not gonna need any help running through BOTH of you bozos and making my way to AngleSlam. Bohemoth strides off, leaving both Alf and Landon glaring into the distance. COLE First Landon advances, then Krista and Leon, and now Bo mixing it up with Alf! Things definitely heating up as the Money In The Bank tournament draws closer to the finals. But the world champion himself is in action later tonight! The camera cuts to the backstage area where Brickston is walking with Vitamin X. The crowd boos loudly. Both Brickston and Vitamin X have cocky smirks on their faces. They are stopped by Josh Matthews. Brickston and VX look at Josh annoyed. JOSH MATTHEWS John "Rock Hard" Brickston. Excuse me, John "Rock Hard" Brickston-- BRICKSTON Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! It's just BRICKSTON now! Just Brickston! JOSH MATTHEWS Okay...Brickston, tonight you intend on shocking 22,000 people here in the Wachovia Center and millions across the world by ending Tha Puerto Rican's dream and his OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship reign. Vitamin X steps in. VITAMIN X I'll handle this. Josh, I don't care how many 'Lightning Bolts' are in the arena tonight, whether it is 22,000 or 72,000. It is going to make no difference to me or my client. PRL, you have faced Brickston many times in the past. And each and EVERY time, you have FAILED to beat him. The only time you defeated him, you needed MY help! Well, I'm not helping you anymore. You are weak. You are pathetic. You are old news! You are yesterday's garbage! Brickston, HE is the future of professional wrestling! And since he is the future of professional wrestling, then it makes perfect sense for him to wear the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt and lead the One And Only AngleSault Thread for many years to come! And that's EXACTLY what is going to happen here tonight! The camera does a close-up of Brickston's face. Brickston sneers at the camera. Vitamin X continues speaking. VITAMIN X (CONT'D) My client has already proven many times, MANY times that he can defeat the man currently holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship. He has also proven that he can beat him up, just like he did last week on HeldDOWN~!. And now tonight on HeldDOWN~!, Brickston will defeat Tha Puerto Rican AGAIN in the most important match of his entire life! I said that I would lead someone else to the One And Only AngleSault Thread Championship if I couldn't do it myself, and I WILL do that here tonight in the main event! Trust me on this! P.R., when Brickston grabs you and delivers the Killswitch, and then SNAPS your ankle in two with the Anklelock, your voice will get even MORE annoying than it is currently as you will feel more pain than you have EVER felt in your whole life! You thought 3 Stages Of Hell against "Shooter" Jay Darring was pain? You thought Hell In A Cell against Bohemoth was pain? Well none of that compares to having Brickston apply the Anklelock on your skinny little ankle, and when you hear the bone snap, you will wish you had The Lightning Crew back at your side! But face it, P.R., The Lightning Crew is DEAD and BURIED, and it's all thanks to you! Maybe if you would have been a better leader and a better friend, then none of this would have ever happened! But I disgress. It is going to be a bad ride for you tonight, P.R., because one way or another, WE are going to come out on top tonight! Brickston is going to beat Tha Puerto Rican once and for all! Because he is THAT much better than YOU! BRICKSTON P.R., clench those fists, because it's fists of fury time! Brickston walks away, an evil smile on his face. Vitamin X walks away too, making sure to bump into Josh Matthews's left shoulder as he walks away. X has a cocky smirk on his face as he walks away. Josh Matthews watches Brickston and Vitamin X leave. The crowd boos. LATER TONIGHT ***WORLD TITLE MATCH*** PRL VS BRICKSTON W/VITAMIN X TONIGHT COMING UP NEXT MEL VS MISTER DICK NEXT
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We cut to a hallway in the locker room, where Sly Sommers, wearing a nice designer suit, is pacing down the hallway. He catches Cooper Riley coming through the back door, just having arrived to the building, and listening to his iPod. SLY Coop! Coop! *yanks the earbuds out* COOPER! COOPER Whoa, settle down teach'. What's the deal? SLY What's the deal?!? You know what the deal is...you took the match with Black behind my back. Then, you decide not to train for it. And now, you're showing up DURING shows! There's only one segment between right now and your match! COOPER I know, broseph. I got my gear on underneath my new phat duds, and I've got it all covered. SLY You better...you know, I don't know what your deal is. You win one match as a fluke... COOPER It wasn't... SLY Yes, it was. It was a fluke, and you think you're a superstar now. Get your head in gear. COOPER *walks up chest-to-chest* It IS in check. Excuse me, I've got to drop my stuff in the locker room, Mr. IN CROWD! The crowd goes "OOOOOOH!" as Riley walks by and the camera pans to a close-up of Sly, looking on in disappointment. Cut to Josie Baker's office. JOSIE As you folks know, last week we had a tag-team contest between D*LUX and the Beverly Hills Blonds, with the winner set to face the World tag team champions, Thunderkid and Reject, at AngleSlam. However, that match unfortunately produced no winner. *crowd boos* JOSIE However, due to the performance of both teams, I've determined that both teams are worthy of a shot at those titles. *crowd cheers* JOSIE So therefore, at AngleSlam, it will be Thunderkid and Reject defending the World tag team titles against D*LUX and the Beverly Hills Blonds. But this won't be your ordinary three-team match. *crowd cheers* JOSIE You see, the way we declare a clear-cut winner in this one, is we hang the World tag team title belts from a ring in the air... *crowd roars* JOSIE And the team that climbs the ladder and gets to them, will be the World tag team champions. If you need to use, say, tables and chairs to get there, so be it! *crowd cheers* JOSIE I'm talking the World tag team titles on the line, at AngleSlam, in a TLC match! *crowd erupts* JOSIE And for a small preview of that match, I've booked a triple threat match for tonight's show. It will be Simon Singleton, versus Tyler Bryant, versus Thunderkid! *crowd cheers* JOSIE Good luck to all the participants! We cut back to the arena with the audience still abuzz over Josie's announcement and the camera focused on Cole COLE You saw earlier in the night, Cooper Riley, the 5'3, 141-pound kid wonder, might've signed on for more than he can chew. COACH He's facing Nathaniel Black, probably the top rising star in our sport in 2008, and pound for pound the best athlete in the OAOAST right now. COLE As you saw before our previous segment, Cooper isn't even taking this match seriously! He snuck out a win over James "Phoenix" Cone at the Big Apple Spectacular and all of a sudden, the kid thinks he's a star! COACH Hopefully he's got some sort of game plan...this could get ugly! Some generic rock song plays over the P.A. system and out comes Cooper Riley! He runs down the aisle and then slides into the ring! He climbs to the middle rope and poses for the crowd. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall with a twenty-minute time limit! First, from West Lafayette, IN...weighing in at 141 pounds, he is the "Human Supersonic" COOPER RILEY! COLE WHAT?!? He has his own nickname too?!!??! "Chelsea Dagger" by the Fratellis starts up and as the lights alternate between red, white, and blue, out comes Nathaniel Black! He pumps his fists in the air as he swaggers down the aisle. He gets some scattered applause out of respect, but definately still has his detractors... BUFFER His opponent, from London, England, he weighs...WHOA! As Nathaniel comes near the ring...Riley leaps over the top rope with a tope con hilo!.... BUUUUUUUUUT, he gets caught and powerbombed on the edge of the ring apron! *BELL RINGS* Nathaniel Black grabs Riley and tosses him back into the ring! As Black enters the ring, Riley gets to all fours. Black hits a running knee strike to the side of his head! Black pulls Cooper up to his feet and lifts him for a vertical suplex. He holds the guy, who's about half of his size, up in the air for seemingly forever... COLE So...you think Sly was right? COACH *laughs* The sky's blue, Mike. Finally, Nathaniel sets Cooper down on his feet. The crowd scuttlebutts in confusion...before he scores a go-behind and locks in his dreaded Crossface Chicken Wing! IMMEDIATE TAPOUT! *BELL RINGS* BUFFER Your winner...NATHANIEL BLACK! Black gets his arm raised by the referee, then leaves the ring, looks into the camera, points at the fallen Riley, and says "That's Zack!"... But while that's happening, James "Phoenix" Cone comes out of the crowd, slides into the ring, and starts putting the boots to Cooper Riley! COLE What is going on here?!?!?! As the boos rise, Phoenix pulls out a roll of barbed wire that was clipped on his belt! Phoenix then wraps the barbed wire around Cooper's head and yanks back! Just then, Sly Sommers runs down the aisle, right past Nathaniel Black...but Phoenix pulls a microphone out of his back pocket... PHOENIX Stop right there, stop right there, stop right there! I will pull on this harder if you touch me! *Sly stops on the apron* I'm not doing this because I'm mad at your boy...he actually lit a fire in my ass to get my intensity back when he beat me! But, I don't want to fight you under your terms, bud! I came up with my own little idea for a match...next week, YOU fight anyone of my choosing. If you win, we do the match with barbed wire, the cell, lighttubes above the ring...but if I win, I'll only insist on one of those implements of destruction being taken away. No disqualification, so you can hit my guy with whatever you want...I just want this for next week. If you don't agree, I'm killing this kid... SLY Deal, deal, deal! Next week, I'll fight whoever you want... PHOENIX Glad you saw things my way... ...Phoenix yanks back further on the barbed wire, stomps the back of Cooper's head, then runs out of the ring and through the crowd as Sly huddles over his fallen protege! COLE I guess we have it: next week, Sly Sommers against an opponent of Phoenix's choosing...if Phoenix's guy wins, any one of the stipulations to Devil's Playground, whether it be the lighttubes, the cell, the knockout rules, or the barbed wire, will be removed from the match! COACH We'll be back right after this! COMMERCIAL
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OAOAST Productions, Proudly Presents... #~~THE LOVE SHACK~~# We go to the ring to find the canvas covered with the decor of The Love Shack set. The a desk, two stools, a purple carpet and a Grand Rapids street sign. Yes, no expense has been spent... uh, spared... no, wait, right the first time. Stood behind his talk show desk is Leon Rodez, who basks in a "LE - ON!" chant for a while with a smile on his face. A retro "In Crowd" shirt adorns his chest, awaiting a possible new one perhaps rather than wearing it out of nostalgia. LEON Alright alright, welcome one and all to another edition of the last talk show standing, apparantly... yes, it is of course The Love Shack. "YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" LEON Yeah, yay, yay. There've been many pretenders, but it's safe to say that time has told and The Love Shack is still... *points to t-shirt*... What's In! And you know what they say, if you're not IN... you... uh, something. Sorry. It's only been one week, I haven't committed the catchphrase to memory yet. But safe to say whatever it is, it's cool and it's poignant in it's meaning. Leon comes out from behind his desk. LEON Now, what can I say about tonight's guest. Well, I would be lying if I said my guest tonight needed no introduction. In reality, she needs an introduction, ranging anywhere from two to five minutes in length, chronicalling her career and her achievements in life, with references to her wisdom and beauty. Unfortunately for her, I don't really feel like it. Ladies and gentlemen, KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN! Up goes the expected roar as MGMT's Electric Feel kicks in, and the cheers grow ever louder at the sight of Krista's well toned body on her entrance video. Shock me like an electric eel baby girl turn me on with your electric feel Ooh girl shock me like an electric eel baby girl turn me on with your electric feel Breezing through the entrance way, Krista takes a sip from her martini glass and just now notices the lack of heavily choreographed dancers there to greet her and to interact with. She contemplates for a second how bad finances must be for there to be no dancers for her entrance for a talk shot segment and yet money to give Tony Tourettes a regular wage, before contemplating dancing alone. But she soon summises that's only for the desperate and those in the privacy of their own home and keeps it cool with some more alcohol sipping as she walks the aisle. Far from dressed up for the occassion, Krista walks with casual ellegance in a summery white mini skirt and yellow vesttop as if she'd just stepped off of Hollywood Boulevard on a August evening's stroll. She pauses on the ramp to remark that the cost-cutting is really badly prioritised on seeing Leon's show set, before making her trademark hanging third rope leg showing no martini spilling reach for the tissues fans at homing entrance. COLE Well, this ought to be very interesting. COACH Thanks for the input. Krista picks up her own microphone and does her best to look interested. LEON Krista Isadora Duncan. Welcome to the show. Safe to say, we haven't so much got unfinished business as we have unstarted business. KRISTA Ooh, cute. That take you long to write? LEON (ignoring Krista) It's been a long time coming, this. As has the match we'll be having next week in the Money In The Bank Tournament, to determine who's going to AngleSlam. After all these many years, with all the water that's passed under the bridge, finally we get to go one on one. Although, not in the way of myself and the other member of COD, unfortunately... which I guess is something we both have in common, but also brings us back to water under the bridge. See, it seems like I just can't have anything happen in my life without you involved in some way sometimes. KRISTA Listen, if this long-winded monologue I've just drifted into is your way of professing a long hidden crush for me, I'm afraid you're gonna have to go ahead and join the queue somewhere behind Theodore Moneymaker, somewhere ahead of Terry Taylor who I insist on keeping chained to the back of said queue despite his long-held ticket being in single-digit, really anywhere in amongst about everyone in this poor, deluded, internet message board with only one guy pretending to be a girl that everyone tries to impress with their 'l33t flaming' skills and the ability to find funny pictures of cats with some crappy web text Photoshopped underneath it resembling poor excuse for a wrestling company. COLE My screensaver is a cat in the middle of a busy street, saying 'SO MUCH PEOPLEZ~!' COACH ... LEON Firstly, you're really in no place to call anyone long-winded. We gauge HeldDOWNs on a wrestling to Krista talking ratio in your honour. And it doesn't always come up on the good side. KRISTA Yeah, we have kinda been having more matches around here lately, huh? Shrugging, Leon doesn't seem all that surprised at the response. LEON Well, loath as I'm sure you are to do it, let's talk about wrestling for a second. Let's talk about our match next week, Money In The Bank Tournament. KRISTA Of all the things we could possibly talk about, THAT's your go to? Oh Leon, I am disappointed. So very, very disappointed. I've never felt so removed from you as I do right now. Come on man. You used to date my lesbian girlfriend! Your sister turned out to be your niece and my daughter who I conceived with a brother of yours kept so secret I doubt even YOU knew about him until I brought his name up for this first time! Your tag-team boyband friends have an uncontrollable crush on me and talk about nothing else. And hey, by the way... does your life flat out SUCK or what? No word of a lie, why do you even bother getting out of bed in the mornings? All that on top of being at Zack Malibu's beckon call 24 hours a day, having to fend off two Nerdlys at once, having a man who actually voluntarily calls himself 'Reject' almost steal the one who's your official girlfriend, basically getting trodden on and stepped all over by everybody ever because you're too nice? And out of all this, you wish to talk of a humble pro wrestling match? Well, I can understand why that'd excite you, what with you being the down to earth pro wrassler who just loves competition and so on. Only, to this boring concoction of 'strange reasonings to continue to exist', you now have $500,000... WOWZA, that's like a lot of money apparantly... and all these TSM shares, which I guess are still important even with US finance being plunged into the depths of the toilet bowl, if you beat me... LEON Ah! Ah! Wrong! You see, this is where you clearly just place me in a group with everybody else instead of giving me just a little credit. I don't care about winning TSM shares. It wasn't so long ago, you and me were on the same side fighting Moneymaker, so you should know as well as anyone how much I despise him. If I beat you next week, nothing will give me greater pleasure, not even the knowledge that I'm one step away from $500,000, not even being one match from a guaranteed World Title shot... nothing will give me greater pleasure than looking Moneymaker in the eyes and telling him where to shove his shares in TSM. KRISTA Hard as I find that to believe, I speak for everyone where I say "boy, that'll show him!" "Atta boy Leon, you get metaphorical on his ass you crazy cat!" LEON The only thing I care about in this whole situation is the World Heavyweight Championship. Not the money. Not the shares. The World Title. See, since day one I've strove to be World Champion and that opportunity just keeps on eluding me. I've never been given that fair shake. The chance to be the man. Winning Money In The Bank gives me that chance after FIVE years of waiting! You see this isn't some sideline project, some merry little distraction to me. Unlike you, this is my LIFE! And yeah, my everyday life revolves around having a good time, about doing what I love, about entertaining these fans. But my life's goal is that World Heavyweight Championship. And you'd better get serious about that if you want to beat me next week Krista. Because the difference between me and everyone else is... I can play fun all you want. We can sing songs till the cows come home. Dance routines, you've got it. Far from distracting me, you'll be humouring me... but I've got all that and the serious edge to top it. KRISTA Now now, granted, my life is a little more extravagant than yours. We people of LA have headier dreams than those of a humble Grand Rapids boy. And, granted, $500,000 doesn't have quite the same eyes bulging, mind-blowing effects on a successful money making machine like moi that it does on those scraping by on humble pro-wrestler pay. But being World Heavyweight Champion... that'd be neat, I guess. Now, as far as distractions go, I'm happy to hear you won't let that happen to you. Honestly, all these poor saps going comatose with drool drippling down my chin the moment I happen to show a little thigh taking a step towards them gets a little tiresome. No doubt my skills on the mic can't be beat, but karaoke nights just aren't the same in a wrestling ring in front of wrestling fans without beer and with Rico on back-up. People get set to charge up them pacemakers because shock shock, horror horror, Krista Isadora Duncan is actually looking forward to having a fine wrestling match next week, with no comical distractions. No singing. No dancing. No quotings of famous playrights or working in of cultural slang of current relevance. Nothing. Honest to Betsy! Cross my heart and hope to meet the big guy with the pitchfork. No no no. There is just one problem however. See, go figure, ol' Krista ain't quite as young and sprightly as she used to be. What can I say, those hyperberic chambers Alix created didn't slow the ravages of time for either of us. They were nice and snug and cosy, but that's another story. So, anyway, ol' Krista goes and gets herself a routine check-up because she's worried about these ten million dollar pins right here. And the doctor, he looks them up and down... and looks them up and down again... and looks them up and down again. So, he gets struck off for sexual harrassment and practicising medicine with a clipboard shoved halfway up his pooper and I consult a female doctor. And it turns out, I have a serious medical condition. Oh yeah. This right knee, turns out it's not quite the 5 million dollar sculpture of bone and flesh it seems. See, any time I get a bump on my big toe... Krista bends over and taps her big toe, at which point she starts shaking her BUTT rhythmically. Leon's eyes can't help but be drawn to the yellow panties under Krista's dress which has riden up her thigh and is shaking violently as her rhythm suddenly amps up. "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" KRISTA ...my buns, they start a shakin'! They call it Fiddy's Disease apparantly. So, it's a comfort to know that should this by some miracle happen next week, you won't be distracted, not even one teensy... little... bit! COACH I think I speak for everyone when I say... BOI-YOOOIIIING!! Mesmerized by the impromptu show, Leon stares on for a while. LEON (after about a ten second delay) You know what, I'm not going to be distracted, because I know you far better than that. Any... improper thoughts... well, they'll be well countered with the usual thoughts of dislike I possess about you. KRISTA Dislike? Come on, no need to be getting raw on me now. LEON Face it. You don't me and I don't like you. Struggling to find a way to disagree, Krista just kinda ends up shrugging like 'so what'. LEON The fact is, you've never liked me. KRISTA Well, can you blame me? Aside from you being the very epitomé of all I hate about the narcissistic male half of the human race, a very large percentile of my overall disgust for you, the name Rodez doesn't exactly conjour up many good memories of my life. LEON Like Jade for example? KRISTA Like your brother, for example. Like being reminded of the trauma of a teenage pregnancy and giving birth to a child knowing full well her father was gone, for example. Seeing you carrying that name around the OAOAST, a constant reminder of that trauma. And then seeing Jade every week in the same building following in the same path as me and knowing I couldn't say a damn thing to her about her real parentage. Is it any wonder I took my hate out on you? Listen, I don't like anybody, let alone some cocky ex-pornstar who's brother impregnated me with a secret child! And don't you even start guilt-tripping me about Jade, okay? I did what was for the best. LEON Yeah, the best for Krista Isadora Duncan, just like everything you do. Not one to get riled up over petty arguements with pro wrestlers easily, Krista doesn't really appreciate that one. KRISTA Wanna know what'd really be best for me right now? Not being here looking at you. Because all those painful memories, oh lord how it clenches up my fist. And when I clench up my fist there can only be two reasons. Guess which. Clue, it involves your face and doesn't involve removing my pants. Besides, I don't remember you being so quick to fill her in on the missing truths of her life once you found out there, Unky Leon. Seems she forgave me a little quicker than she did you. Tell ya anything? LEON And what has she got ever since she forgave you and eventually got her head around the fact you brought her into this world? Huh? Nothing! Her life was going fine until that revelation and it's been a steady decline ever since. Because even when she forgave you, it was all about you. There was no suggestion of the mighty media darling altering her life to adapt to the daughter she abandoned and washed her hands of, oh no! All the adjustment was put on Jade's shoulders. And I know what you're thinking, 'I gave her a better life' and maybe you can provide better things for her but that's not enough. You've completely disrupted her life, just as much as Moneymaker did. You fly her out to Los Angeles away from her family. You move her in with her new sister, who torments her for months. You throw her into a celebrity world she's got no business in, totally unprepared. And you know the worst thing? All the while, you systematically mock her. Just like you do to everybody else in the OAOAST and no doubt in your other life. You MOCK your own daughter, not out of spite or disdain, but because you can't help yourself! You mock her for being shy and quaint. You mock the fact she grew up in the relative quiet of Grand Rapids. You mock her for being NORMAL! The result being, her self-confidence is shot. She doesn't know who she is anymore, all because of you. I see her going out and getting destroyed by Malaysia trying to be Women's Champion, all to live up to the Duncan standards of success. You put her out there with words of praise and encouragement, but then you sit back and watch her fail at something you know that deep down she's not ready for. Modelling? Auditions to be an actress? Same thing. And now? She can be the mouthpiece for two grown men, but everytime I look at my TV screen and see her next to you she's stumbling over her words, uhming and ahhing, totally berefit of the confidence she's built up since coming here. Face it Krista, what Jade needed was a stable home, not a Hollywood Mom... and right now, you're failing her, just like you failed her at birth! .... Yes, for one, Krista is actually momentarily speechless. COLE Wow. COACH Leon just got cold-blooded on Krista. I love it! Having to metaphorically dust herself off after that, Krista does not look happy in the slightest. COACH At least I'll always have that moment to remember Leon by. Thanks brother. It was nice knowin' ya. KRISTA I can't believe I'm saying this, to you, but ya know maybe you're right. Maybe I am about to fail Jade. Because I promised not to tear you apart out here tonight and leave you a snivelling, castrated wreck with no dignity in the middle of what I guess passes for a talk show set around here. But now, I'm not so sure. So Jade, honey, turn off the TV, because it's way past watershed. See I care about Jade. Sure, I've done some shit that I ain't so proud of where she's concerned, but you'd better believe I care about her. So don't you DARE start suggesting I don't. Because if Jade wants me to play nice girl, I can try my best. But if I have to do something to defend myself to her, then trust me when I saw I will rip your face off and wear it as a mask to replace you in her life whilst you're spending the remainder of it trying to dislodge your testicles from your oesophagus! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" KRISTA OOOOOHHHH indeed! "Aw naw she di'nt!" Oh, yes, she did... and oh, yes, she most certainly will! And not only would I be putting you out of the misery I've already described, I'll be doing my female race a major favour in the process, all things considered. God only knows how many abandoned babies you've been responsible for in your life, nevermind ones you thought were siblings. You're busy playing the field, trying to have your Nerdly and eat it too, all too literally, with TWO SISTERS! You letched after Crystal for about a month until she had enough and ran for the hills. Hell, remember why you and Alix broke up? Besides her finally getting her head as close to straight as it'll ever be? Because you cared more about a wrestling belt than your own girlfriend! The 24/7 Title no less. Even the people without girlfriends, ie. everyone else who ever held it, didn't care about it that much! So your track record for screwing up women's lives is pretty much flawless. Maybe that's why I don't feel even the slightest bit bad about Jade moving away from you to LA, taking the Duncan name, converting to my faith, becoming a part of my family. Truth be told, if anyone's got the potential to fail Jade then it'd be you. Because with you as a male role model, who knows how screwed up a human-being she was going to turn out to be! Although I guess if she needed any tips on how to deepthroat a cock properly then you'd have been a godsend! Leon just glares back at Krista, who is apparantly done. Quick and to the point by her standards, but no less savage than usual. The two continue glaring until Krista finally volunteers to end the show by throwing her microphone across Leon's desk and leaving. No music, no nothing, just Krista walking off and Leon left standing in the ring, both with plenty to think about. COLE So, uh, how about that then? COACH Boy, that went sour fast. And it was awesome! COLE Well I think it's safe to say the tension next week will be a few notches higher than it was promising to be after that. Something tells me, just as this was, it won't stay pretty for long between these two. Krista dissappears off into the back as we fade out on Leon stood sternly in the ring. LATER TONIGHT QUARTER FINAL MONEY IN THE BANK MATCH WINNER FACES LANDON MADDIX ALFDOGG VS BOHEMOTH TONIGHT COMMERCIAL
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We return to the arena with the camera focused on Michael Buffer, the audience on their feet, and spotlights in the shape of dollar signs glowing on the ring mat. BUFFER The following, non-title contest, is set for one fall and it is a Quarter Final Match in the Money In The Bank Tournament! As Buffer finishes, a piano plays a melody causing the crowd to erupt. COLE Alright! Try not to get in trouble with this guy too, wouldya Coach? COACH Ah, clam up. The lights go down in the arena, turning back on in tune with the melody. "COME ON!" *BOOM~!* Pyro explodes, leaving behind fire that burns on both sides of the entrance stage. "Gasolina (Remix)" by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil’ Jon and Pitbull starts playing as Colombian Heat rushes out onto the stage, getting the crowd fired up. Heat runs to both sides of the entrance stage and fires that section of the arena up. Heat raises his hands, acknowledging the fans before hand-slapping his way down the aisle. BUFFER On his way to the ring at this time... originally from Bogotá, Colombia, but now residing in Miami, Florida. He weighs in at one hundred and eighty pounds... the reigning OAOAST United States Heavyweight Champion... CCOOOOOLLLLLLLOOOOOOOMMMMMBBIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAANN... HHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAATT!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" Heat slides into the ring and fires up the Philly faithful. COLE Colombian Heat just three more wins away from a guaranteed shot at his good buddy, Tha Puerto Rican and his World Heavyweight Championship. And you've gotta believe that if Heat wins that Money In The Bank contract, he won't be someone who'll sneak around waiting for their opportunity to pounce. Heat's the kinda guy who'll be straight up and in your face, he'll use that contract for a fair one on one shot, man to man. COACH Because he's a putz! The whole point of the contract is you can use it when it's most convenient for you. You say to a guy 'oh, hey, I'm gonna cash my contract in in about three weeks, give you a few weeks to prepare...', might as well say 'hey, while I'm at it, here's a copy of my last five matches on DVD and a list of my personal fears and dislikes for you to study, good luck!' In the ring, Colombian Heat has taken the microphone. HEAT A'ight, a'ight... Philadelphia, Land Of Da Extreme! If ya'll ready to see me make La Cucaracha fell the Heat, then lemme hear ya'll make just a little noise up in this... CROWD BIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATCH~! COACH Ugh! Heat flips the mic back to Buffer and goes into his warm-ups, as the moody intro to "Megalomaniac" begins to play. Boos ring out through the arena, preparing to greet the ever unpopular La Cucaracha. "PREPARE...FOR...LANDON!" ...WAAAAAHHHHH... *DUM DUM* "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Bursting out onto the stage Landon pumps a determined fist at his side before thrusting one triumphant finger over his head. At his side as ever is Megan Skye, both looking in quite determined mood as they head to the ring. Landon extends his hands to his side encouraging cheers because, hey, he's pretty damn good. The fans are not to be swayed though and continue to shout their abuse. BUFFER And introducing the opponent. Accompanied to the ring by MEGAN SKYE. He hails from Huron, South Dakota by way of Madrid, Spain... weighing in at two hundred and eight pounds. The leader of Cucaracha Internacional... the former OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion... ladies and gentlemen, LLLAAAAAAAAANNDDOOOOONN... "LA CUCARACHA"... MMMMMMMMMMAAAAAAAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXXXXX!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Landon's had his fair share of difficulties this year, what with his ongoing struggle to get Todd Cortez back on his side and now Nathaniel Black developing a mind of his own. But Landon's main concern tonight is winning back that World Heavyweight Championship and solidifying Cucaracha Internacional as the top faction in the OAOAST. Landon makes his way up the ring steps, walking down the apron with a sea of downturned thumbs and upturned middle fingers being brandished at him. Just smirking, Landon waits for Megan to hold the ropes for him before spinning himself into the ring. Even before his entrance is over La Cucaracha is on the referee's case to watch for any "funny business" from Heat as he scales the turnbuckles, further winding up the crowd as he postures to the hard camera. COLE So here we go with our third Money In The Bank Tournament Quarter Final. Already advanced, Leon Rodez and Krista Isadora Duncan, who we'll be seeing later on in what promises to be an explosive Love Shack. This promises to be an explosive match right here though. Jumping from the turnbuckles, Landon and Megan go through some last minute strategy, made harder by the noise generated by Heat and the Philidelphia crowd. *DINGDINGDING!* The bell sounds and in an effort to show Heat up, Landon scales the turnbuckles again and poses. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE And if Landon expected that to work, he's the only one in this entire arena. And that's a lot of people. As Maddix pouts at the poor reaction, Heat shows him how it's done by leaping to the turnbuckles opposite and firing up the fans! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" Not one to give up on a challenge, no matter how futile it may be, Landon asks Heat to step aside and let him try again with the part of the crowd he knows is capable of cheering. And Heat stands back amused as Landon asks the crowd to give him what they've got. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Maddix just can't seem to understand what's going on. Sympathising with him, Heat decides that he'll try again for Landon... "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" ...and another round of cheers goes up... ...cut short as Landon leaps up and clubs the unsuspecting Heat in the back with a forearm!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH Haha! Wrestling isn't a popularity contest, it's a brains contest and there's not one person in this company lower ranked than Heat in those stakes! Pulling Heat down off the turnbuckles, Landon stomps him in the corner with a big smile on his face before stopping to point to his head, just to get the point across about how darned smart he is. Landon drags Heat upright, popping him in the jaw with a forearm. And a second. Irish whip then sends Heat corner to corner, Landon following in with a leaping forearm smash... but Heat dodges out of the way! Saving himself, a block with the hands prevents Landon eating turnbuckle. As he comes out of the corner though, he's bowled over as Heat comes off the ropes with a clothesline. Landon pops back up, into a hiptoss. Back up again, scooped and slammed by Heat. Into a corner scrambles Landon and suddenly he wants to make friends, offering up a handshake to his amped up opponent. Heat asks the crowd for their advice, but goes completely against it by reciprocating... almost... just out of reach of Landon's hand, slowly lowering his hand towards the mat. And as Landon's eyes follow it, Heat suprises him with a quick kick up into the shoulder blade sending him out to the floor! COLE You were saying Coach? COACH Well that wasn't smart, that was just deceptive! COLE I don't know, Heat was pretty smart in getting here if I recall. COACH Again, 'smart', apologist speak for cheating. He tied Faqu's feet so he couldn't get into the ring, that's just low. COLE But it was also smart. Maddix paces around ringside complaining to Megan about the cheapshot he just took. Megan is suddenly gone though and Landon soon finds out why, as Heat comes soaring out onto him with a PESCADO! "HEAT!" "HEAT!" "HEAT!" "HEAT!" Heat tags a few hands before going back to business, throwing Landon back inside. COLE The US Champion looking to fly again here in the early going. On the apron, Heat encourages Landon back to his feet. La Cucaracha does come up and walks unsuspectingly into the path of a Springboard Flying Forearm Smash! Cover by Heat... 1... 2... No! Coming back up with renewed determination, Landon swings with a wild forearm. Heat ducks to a knee though, striking to the midsection with a backfist before reaching up and flipping Maddix to the mat by the arm. Rolling through to his feet, Landon rushes forward. Heat bypasses him with a sidestep, catching Landon coming off the ropes with a hiptoss... NO! Turning in mid-air Landon comes down on his feet, popping up onto Heat's thighs and pushing off for the Thesz Plant... but Heat shoves him off and Landon faceplants into the canvas! COLE Heat, one step ahead of La Cucaracha there again! Landon climbs back up and Heat takes him right back down with a swinging headscissors. COLE Landon is used to being the quicker man in the match against most opponents, but not so here with the explosive Colombian Heat! COACH Don't worry, he'll have a plan. He always has a plan. Pulling himself up against the ropes, Maddix is caught and shot across the ring. Before he can hit the opposite ropes though Landon slides into first base and to a stop. Heat rushes at him but Landon cuts him off with a quick boot to the gut. Hitting the ropes, Landon then looks to capitalise, but gets caught with a surprise Powerslam! 1... 2... No! Heat picks Landon back up and strikes him with some open handed chops to the chest. An irish whip sends Landon off the ropes, into a back elbow as he rebounds back. With Landon down, Heat throws up the "Westside W" with his hands and springs to the middle rope, coming back with the WESTSIIIIIIIDE Moonsault... ...and although Landon rolls out of the way, Heat lands on his feet! COLE Nice adjustment! Waiting on Landon, Heat runs in looking for another headscissors... but he gets caught midway around the world and dropped awkwardly across the knee, to a groan from the crowd! COACH How's about that for a nice adjustment? COLE Tilt a whirl into a backbreaker, great counter for the attempted headscissors. Hook of the leg by Maddix... 1... 2... No! Staying on the back, Landon sits Heat up and drives a knee into the spine. Coming off the ropes Maddix then follows up with a hard kick which leaves Heat writhing in pain on the mat. LANDON GOOOOOOAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE The former soccer player getting a painful soccer lesson. COACH That's why Spain are European Champions, right there. COLE .....huh? COACH ...well, they are. Heat starts pulling himself up on the ropes and Maddix walks over, giving him a kick in the body. Then a shot across the back, before delivering another kick. Landon then presses Heat up against the ring ropes... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and delivers a knifedge chop! Heat responds with a short jab, but Landon opens Heat up again... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and hits another chop! As Heat goes down Landon quickly presses his throat against the middle rope and sticks a knee in the back, choking away at the US Champion. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" Clean break from Landon. Eventually. COLE Of course Maddix the last and only Money In The Bank holder in the OAOAST. And as we see him use a shortcut, we're all reminded of the shortcuts he used with that contract first time around to win the World Title. Fluffing his hair Landon smiles as he feels the match going his way now. He brings Heat to his feet, landing a forearm before sending him across the ring with an irish whip, setting up a picture-perfect Dropsault flush to the jaw! Landon's attempts to get some appreciation fail even after that great move and he wisely gives up, making a cover... 1... 2... No! Landon wraps Heat up in a rear chinlock and bides his time, while Heat looks to the crowd for some support in getting to his feet. "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" COLE The US Champion looking for a little inspiration. Trying to add a bodyscissors, Landon looks worried as Heat gets to a knee. From the knee he's quickly up to his feet and Landon adjusts to a more potent sleeper hold, too late as it turns out. Heat goes to the gut with an elbow to the breadbasket. A second. And a third. Hold broken, Heat then breaks free of Landon's clutches and the US Champ catches La Cucaracha by surprise with a right hand. Heat quickly hits another punch! And another! Heat then does the DANCE~!, before completing the Shake, Rattle and Roll! COLE Oh yeah, Heat is feeling it now! COACH And when this idiot starts feeding off of these people, he's like a different person. I just don't get it. Feeling it, Heat loads up Maddix and sends him off the ropes, then up into the air with a BAAAAACK bodydrop! The former World Champion is reeling and walks into a quick scoop and a slam, Heat with a quick SHIMMY~! before he heads to the top. Slapping the turnbuckles he gets the fans even further into it and makes his way to the top. Landon is up but that's of no concern to Heat, who takes off with his patented Missile Dropkick... ...but Landon steps out of the way and Heat crashes and burns!!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE That might cut off the adrenaline flow Heat had going right there. Once Heat rolls onto his back, Landon follows up with a double stomp, bottoming out with the back senton a second later. Landon reaches back and hooks a leg... 1... 2... Kickout! Landon brings Heat up with him and clubs him in the back a few times. He then delivers a straight kick to the chest of the Colombian, almost knocking him head over heels. Grabbing the ankle Landon rolls Heat through to his feet and hooks him by the head, looking for the Cucaracha Cutte... NO! A shove in the back from Heat saves him, Landon sent into the ropes. As he comes back Heat throws a weak clothesline, which is ducked by Landon, hooking the head from the rear this time and bringing Heat down with a neckbreaker, right down across the knee!! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Unhappy with the count La Cucaracha gets on the referee's case. COLE You can just tell how desperate Landon is here, how much becoming World Champion again means to him. Being this close to a guaranteed title opportunity just as he used to win the World Championship last year. COACH The pressure's on, that's for sure. A lot of guys and a lot of groups looking for dominance around here at the moment. "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" Under a barrage of abuse from the fans, albeit quite reserved for Philidelphia, Landon encourages Heat back to his feet, clearly sizing him up for something. The hurting US Champion starts to climb back up and Landon quickly positions himself behind his opponent, stalking him. Once Heat gets to his feet Landon then looks to pounce as he grabs hold of Heat by the shoulders. Just as Landon's feet leave the mat though, so do Heat's, the airborne Maddix getting caught with the PELE KICK~!~! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE THE PELE~!~! Maddix was thinking Lungblower, but he just got blown right out of the air right there! Coming down face-first, Landon staggers up... and Heat summons up the strength to deliver a Superkick! COLE And that one was right in the jaw, Maddix could be out cold! It takes Heat a few second to summon up any extra strength after that second kick. Heat eventually manages to crawl over and make some body to body contact though... 1... 2... NO! COLE Oh, it just took Heat a second too long to make the cover and that could have cost him right there! Megan breathes a sigh of relief, but is soon worrying once more as she sees the far-away look in Landon's eyes as he tries to recover. Both men slowly return to their feet and Heat attacks first with a right hand. And another. And a third, Landon with no defence as he stumbles up against the ropes. He puts up a flimsy guard which Heat swats away... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...to deliver a knifedge chop. *SLAP!* "AAAAAAHHHHHH!" And a second, causing Megan to cover her face in shame as her woken-up man lets out a scream. COACH Why do people have to chop Landon when they know it hurts him so much? COLE Well, gee, maybe if he went around the locker room and asked nicely they might go easy on him. It's not like the point of professional wrestling is to inflict pain on people or anything. Stifling laughter at his opponent, Heat looks for an irish whip... but Landon reverses to arm's length and boots him in the gut! He quickly follows up with a DDT, then rolls off to the left to turn Heat over into a front guillotine choke! COACH This oughta cause some pain! COLE Colombian Heat sunk in Wet Cement and in big trouble here. Maddix adds a bodyscissors to the hold and Heat is well and truly stuck now. Nodding his head eagerly, Landon tightens on his choke as the referee checks for any submission. Heat wags his finger saying no for now though, refusing to give in. Despite his position Heat lifts up his foot and knowing where he is in the ring he tries to place it on the bottom rope in front of him. Megan sees it and warns Landon, who holds onto the choke regardless. Energy begins to sap out of Heat's body pretty soon and as he begins to fade, he tries again, shuffling forward a little on his backside. He feeds his foot out... and touches the bottom rope... not good enough for a break, but enough for Landon to release the hold and stack up Heat with a hopeful folding press... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Not enough. Heat still has something left. Having had enough himself, Landon calls for the end. He waits for Heat and lifts him up into a fireman's carry, looking to put him to sleep... but Heat slips out the back. Heat applies a full nelson and Landon gets Crunk'd Up, middle of the ring! COLE A lot left, maybe! COACH Oh come on, no. COLE Careful. COACH Yeah I know, I know, watch my mouth... but, come on, not Colombian Heat! Now it's Heat looking for the end and he gets back to his feet, taking a look out around the crowd... as he clutches his throat and gasps for air! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" COLE There's the signal! As he reaches his feet Landon gets a boot to the gut, Heat turning back to back and hooking up the arms. With a quick twist he's underneath La Cucaracha and elevates him off his feet, hovering him over the mat... but Landon starts kicking his feet until they're back on solid ground. Heat quickly lifts again, but this time he over-compensates and Landon goes all the way up and over the back, untangling himself from Heat and pulling him down into an O'Connor roll... 1... 2... TIGHTS! BUT NO! COLE Maddix trying to take the cheap way out, but luckily only two! The referee suspects foul play but the chance to reprimand Landon doesn't come. Hitting the ropes in front, Landon catches Heat on his way up, around the head with his left arm, swinging himself around the back and bringing him down from the right side with an inverted bulldog! COACH What a move that is. Heat is knocked loopy from hitting the back of his head and unaware of where he is, he stumbles back to his feet. Unwittingly though, he plays right into Landon's hands. Getting to one knee, Heat stops and Landon takes aim... not with his usual shining wizard, but a SUPERKICK, right in the cheek! Before the US Champion can hit the mat, Landon then elevates Heat up onto his shoulders... COLE Look out here... COACH Nighty night! ...AND CRACKS HIM WITH THE GO 2 SLEEP!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Three quick attacks in succession and Heat is out! With a look of relief Landon drops and hooks up a leg, to boos from the fans resigned to hearing the... 1... 2... 3!!! *DINGDINGDING!* Megan punches a fist on the sound of the bell and enters the ring, as Landon pushes up off of Heat with a smile. Taking the referee's duty she raises Landon's hand, as La Cucaracha looks around with all the confidence of a man who was in complete control of the whole match, which of course he wasn't but don't tell him that, hey. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner, advancing to the Semi Finals of the Money In The Bank Tournament... LANDON "LA CUCARACHA" MMMAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIXXXXXXXX!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" One foot on Heat's chest, Landon extends his hands in celebration. COLE So we know three of our four semi-finalists and Landon Maddix is now one step closer to another Money In The Bank contract. Landon is finally convinced to stop stepping on his fallen opponent and takes his celebrations elsewhere, leaving the ref to check on Heat. Happy with his victory Landon laughs it up all the way to the back and possibly all the way to the bank, as we go elsewhere! That elsewhere being backstage which is mostly empty save except for Zack Malibu taking a timeout from tonight's festitivies to treat himself to a cup of coffee at the catering table. He's given several seconds of quietness, and then Theodore Moneymaker, in black pinstripped suit, seconded by his suit clad cronies CPA and Detective Bosley approach him. MONEYMAKER Gentlemen, what's this? BOSLEY I ain't all that sure, boss, but it looks like Zack Malibu getting' coffee? CPA Zack Malibu? The Franchise, getting his own coffee? What's this world coming to, guys? MONEYMAKER What's the matter, Zack? Leon burn himself cooking you dinner? Bo out filling up that rental car with gas? Sly out videotapping himself playing in traffic so you've got something to laugh about with the wife at home? BWHAHAHAHA! Where are your hand maids, Zack? ZACK Funny seeing you here, Moneymaker. Alix is auctioning off video tape of Krista jogging on the beach in a bikini, I'd thought you put at least half your trust fund down on that. While, Moneymaker seriously weighs the wisdom of that particular purchase, CPA shields him from a possible confrontation with The Franchise. CPA Why does the man wanna disrespect, Bosley? BOSLEY I don't know, Chris. I just don't know. Zack, stand in the presence of man who's haircut is worth more then the whore Unafraid and very annoyed, Zack steps to Bosley intent on throwing down. BOSLEY Easy there...worth more than the whore who shot ya out in some backwater trailer park, and you want to disrespect him? I don't get it. ZACK There's not much to get. I show respect to those who give respect. Simple as that. Moneymaker puts on an expression of false humility as he inches closer to Zack. MONEYMAKER Zack, Zack, I'm having fun, buddy. I'm just making jokes, I'm cracking wise, its the OAOAST way. Zack dismisses Moneymaker's weak excuse with a snort. ZACK I know all about the OAOAST way, Theodore. Believe me. Moneymaker can't help but chuckle, prompting his henchmen to do the same. MONEYMAKER Do you now? ZACK Damn right I do, buddy. Damn right I do. A hell of lot more than you do, that's for sure. School may be out, but I'm still going to give you an education. You see, guys like me, your cousin Tony Brannigan, CWM, even that surly prick Alfdogg, we blazed a trail, we set out in uncharted waters... MONEYMAKER Here we go! Zack appears shocked at being interrupted by the outburst. ZACK Here we go with what? MONEYMAKER Here we go, with the heroic tale of Zack Malibu, the savior, the messiah, the deity, the demi god, the whatever the hell you want to call him, he is our lone hero, our knight in shinning armor and everyone in the OAOAST owes his holiness a tithing of no less than ten percent of their salary. With such otherwordly achievements its a wonder Mel Gibson hasn't penned your life tale as a follow up for the Passion Of Christ. BWAHAHAHAHA! BOSLEY (patting his boss on the shoulder) Hehehehehe good one. ZACK Be sarcastic all you want. That's fine. But I'm giving you the history of the company you so often like to claim you're changing the very face of. MONEYMAKER That's just it. You're giving us history. Your knowledge of the OAOAST way...that is history. You, your little new age In Crowd, its pathetic. ZACK What did you just say? Its what? MONEYMAKER Its you clinging to a relic of a time when you were in charge. When your opinion, when anything you did mattered. You're scraping and clawing to get that time back, that time when Zack Malibu was number one, when no one could touch him, when he was the undisputed king of the OAOAST. And you've surrounded yourself with loyal servants to destroy any one who challenges your rule. There's a problem. That time is like WDW, HI-YAH, the 24/7 title, and IntenseZone, dead and buried and never coming back. There's a new untouchable superstar, a new franchise in the OAOAST, someone who's loyal servants are ten times as meaner and times as nastier as your's... Bosley and CPA crack their knuckles and snarl. MONEYMAKER And he is the king, and you are pauper, and I suggest you bow before me and kiss my ring. ZACK I have a better idea. Why don't you bow before me and kiss my ass! That did it! Bosley and CPA step infront of Moneymaker, eying down Zack, ready to brawl with the three time world champion. That is until The Meterosexual Monster, BOHEMOTH~! Steps onto the scene to lay down the law! BOHEMOTH There a problem here? Suddenly The Enterprise faction is a lot less keen on fighting, and a lot more keen on retreating. MONEYMAKER No, good sir. None whatsoever. Gentlemen, let's go. Bohemoth, best of luck to you in your match later tonight. Zachary, we'll be seeing each other again. Look forward to it. Moneymaker and his crew walk away, trailed by the furious glare of Zack and the skeptical one of Bo. BOHEMOTH There's a guy talking himself into an ass kicking. Zack nods solemnly and we fade out. COMING UP NEXT THE LOVE SHACK~! WITH FIRST TIME EVER (REALLY!) GUEST KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN NEXT! COMMERCIAL
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From the wachovia center I guess. Home of the Flyers, 76ers, AFL Soul, and AHL Phantoms. Book something, people! Book something!
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Brought to you by American Express Taped: 7/31/08 First air date: August 2nd 2008 (check local listings for airings in your area) Announce team: Tony Schiavone and Jesse "The Body" Ventura Lead correspondent: Tony Brannigan The show opened with the House Of Worship, featuring no less a guest than the In Crowd's Bohemoth! The Meterosexual Monster was present to discuss his upcoming MITB quarterfinal contest against The Deadly Alliance's Alfdogg. Bohemoth said that for years he's been denied what he's desired most, the OAOAST World Title, and that regardless of Alf's accomplishments and what stable he leads, he's going to the win the tournament and claim gold. That should've been it for the HOW, except Abdullah wanted to nag Bo about the In Crowd. Without giving Bo a chance to respond, AAN accused the In Crowd of riding the coattails of the stable renaissance The Enterprise, “a true collection of classical human beings, created, and said the IC was best left in the dust ridden hallways of the OAOAST archives to decay in an anonymous peace. Then Abdullah went on to say that the only true In Crowd were the good people sitting on the shoulder of Allah. That may not have sat well with the big man, but he certainly didn't show any anger as he stood up and calmly said he and Abdullah would have a chance to settle their issues in their match tonight! Faqu W/James Blonde Vs Augustine Chambers. This was basically a showcase match for The Samoan Wrecking Machine as the youngster from OAOVW never stood a chance. His every strike was met with an annoyed snarl from the islander that was followed up with a vicious assault. Chambers seemed incapable of inflicting a single bit of damage on the monster and was mercifully finished off by the Death By Samoan, ending the match in a mere fifty three seconds. Winner: Faqu, via pinfall James Riggs, Felix Strutter and Reggie Lamont Vs Deuce Deuce, Jumbo, and Denzel Spencer The face team was out for revenge and blood, and Riggs wanted no part of that! Thus he hung on the apron during the early portion of the match to offer words of encouragement. Encouragement was definitely needed, as Strutter and Lamont were overpowered by the sheer size of the tons of fun twins. Even going 2 on 1 against Jumbo did not fare terribly well for the two. Thus Riggs agreed to come in, and cut Jumbo down to size with a chop block. That gave Riggs the chance to target the much larger man's legs. Riggs was able to remain in control for several minutes of leg work. But his offense was broken up by a blind tag from Spencer. The Jamaican's speed and martial arts based assault were a nuisance to Riggs, but he battled them with his own technical moves as he tried to hold down Spencer with various creative pin attempts. After a twisting northern lights suplex failed to get a three, Riggs tagged in Strutter. He and Lamont were able to isolate their archrival from his corner for quite a while. Spencer was victimized by several suplexes and DDT's and seemed to be on the verge of being defeated. But an ill advised flap jack from Lamont let Spencer apply the tag to an outstretched Jumbo AND Deuce. Strutter charged into the ring but as flattened by dual lariats from the chubbos. Painfully, he got back up but was lifted high into the air by a double back body drop. Riggs saw this and immediately high tailed it to the back, aware that he backed the wrong horse. This left Lamont to do work for his team. And what poor work it was! The three men pounced on him with punches and clubbing forearms and punished him with a triple powerbomb before Jumbo ground his body to bits with a bear hug for a submission. Winners: Deuce, Jumbo, and Denzel Spencer via submission This week on HeldDOWN~! Quarter Final Money In The Bank Qualifying Matches: Landon Maddix Vs Colombian Heat Alfdogg Vs Bohemoth World Title: PRL Vs Brickston PLUS MORE!!! Backstage we saw Josie Baker in a very rare moment of solitude that was immediately broken up by Spanish Fly. Unlike Leon he didn't come to catch up on old times, and unlike Alix he didn't come to solicit her for sex. Instead the little guy was there to demand that he be a more prominent feature on HeldDOWN. Josie had to laugh at this request, saying that she tried to give him a chance in the Money In The Bank tournament in which he lost, and he “hadn't won a match since Calvin Szechstein was general manager” and didn't deserve a prominent spot. Fly was aghast at her flippant comment and stated he'd prove himself by beating the next person who walked in the door. Josie shrugged her assent, and leaned into her speaker phone to say “Sophie, send Baron Windells into my office.” Fly's heart sunk to his stomach, and then finally to the floor, when the Lonestar Gunslinger walked into the room. “You wanted to see me?” he asked, to which Josie said “No, but your opponent tonight wanted to.” After Baron left smirking to himself, his old nemesis Abdullah Abir Nerdly ran into the room. Mixing Arabic with English he went on an incredible, animated tirade. Fortunately he spoke enough English for Josie to understand he didn't want to wrestle Bohemoth to night. Already annoyed that Bo even created the match, Josie canceled it on the spot, angirly saying that Bo doesn't make the matches, she does. And that was that apparently, as Abdullah offered her the "many blessings of Allah". 9-Mill Vs Liberty Extra security was on hand to prevent a repeat of last week's melee. Unfortunately the chief problem was that security was even more afraid of the PD then the AAB's were. And security would need to be on their sharpest watch, as before the match began Black and Freedom got into a heated argument. Referee Billy Silverman realized that the security guards were of absolutely zero use to anyone and ordered the two back to the lockeroom. 9 Mill and Liberty were enough of a handfull on their own, with two grapplers brawling all across the ring. Most of the problems for the referee came from 9-Mill, as Silverman had a devil of a time warning against the LA native's liberal use of closed fists. Liberty for his part kept it clean, but still hit 9 Mill with amazing force until the G hit him with a G-Dup chokeslam. From there 9 Mill proceeded to work over his foe's neck, before trying to earn a submission with a neck crank. If such a move exists. I think I may have made it up! Anyway, after getting support from a crowd that sung “U-S-A! U-S-A!” the cleancut good guy powered out of the hold. The two went back to trading furious strikes with neither man earning the upper hand. That was until 9-Mill hit jack pot with a knee to the gut that allowed him to score big with a Crack Dat Neck (shinning wizard to the back of the neck)! Winner: 9-Mill via pinfall Post match, The PD celebrated as they backed up the entrance ramp. Their celebration was, however, cut short by Freedom attacking them both with a flag pole. Thankfully security rushed onto the scene before another crazy brawl could ensue. On the interview stage Tony Brannigan caught up with Tim Cash and a whole lot of stink bugs. Cash said he understood that The Burroughs Boys wanted to start making a name for themselves. But all they succeeded in doing last was piss him off and push his buttons. Now, he's going to push back until there's nothing let of the BB's. He finished off with a special promise for one of the Boys, promising that when he gets to Quincy, he'll make him eat every one of the stink bugs. AngleSlam Dicks, Rich Pricks & Beautiful Chicks Live from The Alamodome August 31st San Antonio, Texas ***The Lonestar Gunslinger Baron Windells Vs Spanish Fly*** Fly did the smart thing at the start of the match, and tried to run away from the hunky cowboy. The former Lightening Crew member trotted laps around the outside of the ring, leading Windells on a wild chase. Then Baron decided to stop dead in his tracks, and hide from Fly. Of course Fly didn't notice Baron was no longer chasing him, until he walked right into a lariat! Baron then chucked the dazed high flyer into the ring and proceeded to beat on him with power moves that thrilled the crowd. Fly avoided a Bite My Shiny Metal Ass BUTT bump, and took advantage of Windell's tushy pain for a moment of high flying attacks. But his time on the offense was short lived as Baron reversed a crossbody block into a Devil's Addiction (fall away slam). Wounded by the signature attack, Fly tried to scramble out the ring but Baron kept him inside to punish him with a Myspace Comeback (boomerang lariat), followed by a Brigham Young Cocktail (leaping ddt) for a pin. Winner: Baron Windells via pinfall As the show closed, Baron wasn't celebrating. Rather he was pointing a menacing finger at Mister Dick and Malaysia, who stood atop the entrance stage offering sarcastic applause for the victory.
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show is up, mes amis!
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Hey, I'd really, really, hate to be a nag, but is there anyway you could not use Jade in this match or at least not have her get r-locked, because it wouldn't make sense for over-protective Krista to just let her daughter get man handled, and then put in a deadly submission hold and then totally ignore it, and I'm lazy and you see what I'm saying here? Like, off the top of my head, could Jade be replaced with Shayne? That's less work, because, hell, I myself could just do "find and replace" and replace Jade with Shayne. Thanks! And, hey, one more thing, were you guys planning on doing some sort of injury angle with Molly where she has to miss time, because I kinda sorta have to use her cinematic talents next week. Not for a match mind you!
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***Money In The Bank 2nd round Match*** Alfdogg Vs Bohemoth
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Huge segment to start off with! It'll be cool to see the interactions between those four guys. I think there should be cool and unique developments over the course of weeks as the various stables mix up with each other. I forgot Nada Surf even existed until I read that skit, I think they got a new album out. Catchin up on old times with Josie and Leon, all she needs now is to shoot the shit with Faqu and Blonde and the reunions are complete. Very cute skit, with Josie showin the past is past, and being probably the only one in the fed to be unreceptive to Leon's friendly ovatures. Everyone chills with Leon! All of CCB (or Dr.Zoidberg's if you ain't got memory issues like I do) characters are great. Some of these IRA guys are like human grenades I thought they might pull a glock out and start shootin'. Interesting little interplay between hotheaded Junior and more calm relaxed senior. And we got a new title later in the show! Intrigue and development from Sly and Cooper. Wonder how long Coop is gonna tolerate being treated with kid gloves. Fun fact, that's first time I ever used the term “kid gloves” it will also be last. I fucks with this Reject/Maggie/Leon love triangle. I fucks wit it! We got some strong displays of character from The R-Man, and even though he doesn't talk that much, ThunderKid's showing some personality to. Good, high energy match between these two familiar opponents. Wonder what Josie's gonna do about that ending though? Triple threat? Rematch? Top segment by Alf and Tony with the 'Prise and the DA, with Teddy displaying his classic two-faced behavior at the end. That's the power of team work, friends. Respect it. P.Diddy would fuck coach up for his bitchassdness, that man got no swag! Hanging off the next man's nuts? He's exposin his hoish tendencies. Lookin forward to seein just what goes down when the match gets edited in. Already told 149 what I thought about the AS rundown. Cute seg. EXCELLENT promo by Reject followed by an equally excellent mainevent! Really awesome match, that 'ish was crack, b. Loved reading that. But how's this gonna affect Leon/Maggie? Will it repair the relationship or does it only go downhill from here? I guess Leon has other things to worry about with having to fight his neiece's mother in two weeks.
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CREDITS Zack Zoidberg O'Green KC Alf EWC 149
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THE FOLLOWING PROGRAM IS INTENDED FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY PRESENTED IN HD The introductory video combines with Ultimate Victory to welcome a viewership of millions worldwide to the zaniest show on Television... We open the show tonight with the sight of fans cheering, signs being raised...and in the middle of the squared circle, everybody's favorite prep, ZACK MALIBU, stands facing the hard camera, mic in hand. MALIBU This is something that couldn't wait, and won't be held off any longer. For the last few months, there's been a lot of change in the OAOAST. Some for the better, but unfortunately, there's been a lot that's been for worse. I'm a company man through and through...we all know the story about how the torch was passed to me over six years ago, and how the namesake himself made me his successor. For over six years I have fought, bled, and even put my own family in jeopardy all because of how much I love this company, because as much as I've done for it, it's done just as much for me. That is why I'm not going to let happen what I see happening. I'm not going to let this place become corrupted, not by The Enterprise, or Cucaracha Internacional, or Josie, or whoever. Too many people trying to mold this place into their ideal playground, and I'm telling you right now, it's not going to happen. You can say that I've been at fault for being a favorite, but I dare anyone in that locker room, here in this crowd, or over at Sofa Central to tell me that everything I've gotten was EARNED, whether it be a particular match, a championship belt, or the respect of my peers. I look at The Enterprise, flashing money around knowing that there's always more where it came from, and you know what? It doesn't intimidate me, nor will it ever sway me. I look at Cucaracha Internacional, and all I see is someone so insecure about his own ability that he has to lure talent to rally behind his cause so that they're not percieved as his equals, but as his subjects. I see a locker room slowly crumbling into disarray with this changing of the guard and now, I think I might have a solution. The crowd buzzes, as Malibu looks around at the various looks of wonder and anticipation spread out in the crowd. MALIBU There are certain things that can't be replaced. Certain points in time that can never be done over, but it doesn't mean that they can't be done again. Maybe, just maybe, they can be done a little better. Six years ago I came into this federation and immediately became a target. The aWo, The Deadly Alliance, the Dungeon of Doom...whatever the case might have been, I walked into a mob mentality. I was a sitting duck...until I followed suit, and by doing so forming one of the, if not THE most memorable stables in wrestling history! The crowd buzzes, and a slight, albeit loud, chant of that former stable goes up, spreading through the crowd. MALIBU We're not going to try to redo any of those days, because that's a time near and dear to my heart...but tonight, I stand before you to open up a new chapter in the history of that stable. Because the mob mentality will not sweep through this company the way its been. I'm hereby putting The Enterprise, and Josie, and Landon Maddix and his boys on notice...you knew you were going to have to deal with me, but I bet that NONE of you expected...THIS! CUE: A classic OAOAST Theme Song~! The crowd rises to their feet, as a vintage anthem booms over the loudspeakers, and three of the OAOAST's most popular stars emerge from the back, all dressed sharp like the former World Champion. MALIBU Ladies and gentlemen...BOHEMOTH, SLY SOMMERS, LEON RODEZ...THE IN CROWD~!~! The fans ROAR, as the three men hit the ring, each one embracing Zack and Leon even getting a little "cool handshake" action a la the days of Superstar and EvenflowDDT. The fans are on their feet, applauding this, as Zack Malibu has reformed the most popular group in OAOAST history (no pun intended!) MALIBU So now, take note. Four men, four of the OAOAST's best, united against whatever you have to bring. You think that having Anglesault knocked out of power would stop me from carrying the flag for this company? Do you think I need any handouts? I earn things, as I've said before, and one of those things just happens to be the respect of these three men alongside men. Men I've both teamed and battled with. We've all gone through hell for each other and against each other, but it's built a solid foundation for us. We know we can trust each other. We know we can rely on each other, and we know that combined, we are more than any of you can handle. Individually, we're good. We're DAMN GOOD. Together...well, we're The In Crowd, and if you're not IN... Malibu holds the mic out, and the crowd shouts in unision, finishing the catchphrase. ...YOU'RE INSIGNIFICANT~! "Popular" hits again upon the exit of the four men. A new (old) force to be reckoned with has just been turned loose on the OAOAST, and this one is surely to become a hot topic of conversation in the locker room, as HelDOWN~! heads to its first commercial break! Naw, fuck that, I run the show! -We cut to the halls in the back of the arena. The halls are lined with assorted pictures of old White dudes in suits. Cos it's Virginia. They probably own tobacco plantations. Anyway, we're there, and we can hear yelling. Not happy yelling, but angry, violent yelling. The camera moves swiftly to the door that it's coming from, and... IT'S NOT THE DOOR AT ALL! It's coming from BEHIND THE DOOR! The door is cracked slightly, so the cameraman has no problem getting in. Inside we see three people: JOSIE!, The OAOAST President/General Manager, COLIN MAGUIRE, JR!!, and of course... COLIN MAGUIRE! The Maguire's stand side by side in front of Josie, who is sitting back on her desk. JUNIOR I mean, SERIOUSLY! You booked WHAT kind of match, Baker?! JOSIE ...a Submissions Only match... JUNIOR A SUBMISSIONS ONLY MATCH! And DID I submit?! JOSIE Well, technically, no... JUNIOR NO! I did NAWT submit! NAWT! N-O-T, NAWT! So tell me WHY THE FUCK your douchebag cousin is still the champion! -Colin Maguire, Sr. shakes his head softly. MAGUIRE Collie, you need to calm down now, son... JUNIOR NO! Dad, this should nawt even be an issue! It's a submissions only match, nobody submitted, there is no winner...I DID NAWT LOSE THAT MATCH, there was NO WINNER, and there is GOING TO BE A REMATCH! -The fans cheers are mixed at this. Half of the fans boo at Junior's brashness, while the other half cheer at the idea of Grey/Maguire II. Josie shakes her head as she grabs her pack of cigarettes, a small smile creeping onto her face. She slowly pulls one out and puts it in her mouth. Colin Sr. presents a Zippo lighter, lighting the cigarette for her. JOSIE Colin...Junior...you LOST that match. -The fans erupt as Junior moves toward Josie, his hand clenched into a fist. Maguire grabs him by the arm and pulls him back slightly. Josie chuckles slightly. JOSIE Junior, honey...I've been Devil Dolled by Ragdoll...I've been hit with chairs, trash cans, barbed wire, you name it...hell, Axel has given me a few concussions just for being there. Do you really think that threatening to PUNCH me is going to scare me? -Junior pulls his arm away from his dad and sits back down, his anger still very evident. JOSIE ...ANYWAY...Junior, I will admit...your match's result was caused by very unfair circumstances. Your sister's involvement - albeit sweet and, quite frankly, pretty cute - did upset the course of the match, which seemed to be going in your favor. In my eyes, that does not fly. -The fans lightly cheer as Josie takes a drag off her cigarette. She holds the smoke in for a moment before blowing the smoke out her nose. JOSIE On that note, you broke my cousin's ribs in that match, so your title match is going to be...well...put on rain check... -Junior shakes his head at this, his anger coming back. Maguire puts his hand onto Junior's shoulder, trying to calm him down. JOSIE So...you will get another shot at my cousin Jereme at AngleSlam. -The fans erupt! Junior smiles wide as Maguire nods his head. JOSIE It will be a No Disqualification match... -The cheers grow much louder as Junior nods in approval. Suddenly, the door swings opens, and in walks... EVELYN MAGUIRE! The cheers go off the richter at the sight of her. She smiles to Josie and her dad, but it fades once she looks at her brother, who's smile has also been replaced by the angriest look you could imagine. JOSIE ...and SHE'LL be the Special Guest Referee. -THE CHEERS! OH GOD THE CHEERS!! JUNIOR WHAT?! MAGUIRE What?! EVELYN ...What? JOSIE You, Evelyn Maguire, will referee the No Disqualification rematch between your brother Colin, and my cousin, Jereme Grey, for the SJPW Cruiserweight Title at AngleSlam. Is that cool with you? -Evelyn looks around the room and at her Dad. He smiles slightly, shrugging to her. EVELYN Uh...I...I dunno.. JOSIE Honey, you don't have a choice...you're the guest referee. -Junior fumes as Evelyn hangs her head. She is now standing beside her father, almost hiding from her brother. JOSIE Now...if you'll excuse me...I have more business to attend to. So...skedaddle. -Junior quickly stands and rushes out of the room, slamming the door. Colin and Evelyn slowly stroll out as the camera fades....NOW WE CAN GO TO COMMERCIAL! LATER TONIGHT TAG TEAM NUMBER ONE CONTENDER SHIP D*LUX VS THE BEVERLY HILLS BLONDS TONIGHT TONIGHT'S MAINEVENT SECOND ROUND MONEY IN THE BANK MATCH LEON RODEZ VS REJECT THE MAINEVENT BUT COMING UP NEXT SECOND ROUND MONEY IN THE BANK MATCH KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN VS CUBAN WALL NEXT
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COLE Coming up next, Money In The Bank Quarter Final. Reject, Leon Rodez, first time one on one meeting... and with No Holds Barred! *COMMERCIAL BREAK* COLE Welcome back to HeldDOWN~! and with The Coach apparently 'otherwise occupied', it's my pleasure to welcome Maggie Nerdly to the Sofa Central hotseat. And Maggie, uhm, I guess it's appropriate that you're out here to watch this since you've been a source of conflict in recent weeks between the two men we're about to see, Reject and your boyfriend Leon Rodez. MAGGIE First off hotbiscuits, good to be here. And second... yeah, I don't think it's all that ideal personally. But Josie grabbed me and told me to get out here to fill in, so I dunno. I'm just here to do my job. Or, your job. Or Coach's job, whatever that is. COLE God only knows. Well I understand this might be a bit of an awkward situation for you in that case, so I'll try my best to stay professional. MAGGIE Just call me by the right name and we'll be chill. COLE I make no promises. Finally we go up to the ring, the anticipating silence of the crowd turning to boos as "Renagade" by Jay-Z and Eminem hits. Down go the lights, only a single white spotlight shining out through the arena as the bassline hits. The first thing the light hits is the confident smile of Reject as he steps out. 'The R-Man' swaggers to the ring, shining up his Tag Team Title belt as he enters the ring. BUFFER The following contest is a Quarter Finals match in the $500,000 Money In The Bank Tournament... and, it will now be a NO HOLDS BARRED MATCH! Introducing first... hailing from The Bronx, New York. He weighs in tonight at two hundred and thirty five pounds. Representing The Deadly Alliance... one half of the reigning OAOAST World Tag Team Champions... ladies and gentlemen, this is RRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEJJJJJEEEEEEEEEEEEEECCTT!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Climbing off the turnbuckles, Reject waves and winks down at Maggie. COLE Reject seems to have the eyes for you, Maggie. MAGGIE Either that or he's seen his reflection in something shiny. Reject grabs the mic from Buffer and paces the ring as his music dies down. COLE Looks like Reject's got something to say before this match! REJECT Well, well, well...looks like we're finally here, Leon. Just you, and me, one-on-one, No Holds Barred. *crowd cheers* REJECT Just like all these folks out here, I can't wait. I'm too excited, I gotta sit down... Reject motions to the timekeepers' table for a chair, which an official slides into him. He folds it out in mid-ring, and sits down in it, facing the aisleway. REJECT Because you see, after WEEKS of putting up with your attitude, with your cheap shots, with your jealousy...tonight, I finally get to make things right. I finally get a chance to take a chair...just like this one...(Reject turns to his side and rubs the back of the chair)...and decorate it with your blood. *crowd boos* REJECT Speaking of this chair...I want to take this time to flash back, to an incident that took place... At that moment, a fan slides into the ring, and Reject, hearing the commotion, rises from his seat and gives him a back kick to the chest, then lays in some stomps as security yanks him out of the ring. The crowd cheers, as Reject moves the chair back to the ropes, then calmly sits back down. REJECT As I was saying...I want to replay the scene from earlier tonight. Because I was watching it in the back after it happened, and I couldn't help but notice something that happened there in the aftermatch. So if the crew could just roll that tape, that'd be swell. Reject sits calmly as the tape plays. REJECT Freeze it right there. The camera cuts back to Reject in the ring. REJECT You see that look, Leon? Take a good look. You know what that look says? Maggie KNOWS that she has something with the R-Man. Four weeks ago, when I took her out for dinner, she told me as we were leaving the restaurant: 'This is the most that a man has appreciated me in weeks.' And yes, I meant it that night when I said, that it was EXACTLY what it looked like...and more. Reject cracks a sly smile, as the crowd boos. Over at the commentary table, Maggie looks on unimpressed. REJECT I gave Maggie everything that a woman could ask for from a man. Everything... Reject stands up, then walks over to the ropes and looks into the main camera. REJECT Everything that you, instead, choose to give to her SISTER behind her back. COLE Oh come on! The crowd gives a mixed reaction, part booing Reject, part stunned by his remark. REJECT So you can't blame her, Leon, for being concerned for a guy like me. And Maggie...this goes out to you. *turns to Maggie* I can continue to give all of that to you for as long as you want...it's your choice. But for now, Leon...I'm going to give you all that I have. Starting right now. Reject gives a long stare into the camera, before handing the mic back to Buffer. COLE Is this guy delusional or what? Give me a break! Maggie, I apologise. Reject unstraps the Tag Team Title belt from around his waist and hands it to referee Mike Chioda. COLE If you don't mind me asking, what is the deal with you and Reject? You did seem a little grateful for his help earlier if I'm honest. MAGGIE There is no deal, I just made a huge mistake trying to make Leon jealous and a huger mistake by involving this walking ego, okay? It's complicated. Simplest way I can put it is, I don't care about Reject, I just care about Leon. And apparently those sentiments stretch to the people of Richmond, as a roar goes up for "Rock The Casbah". BUFFER And his opponent! From Grand Rapids, Michigan... weighing in at two hundred, eighteen pounds. A member of The Love Generation... "THE NEW-AGE LOVE MACHINE"... "THE GRAND RAPIDS GOLDEN CHILD"... ladies and gentlemen, "SILKY SMOOTH"... LLLLLLEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOONN... RRRRRRRROOOOOOODDEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZ!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" The robed Rodez glides his way down the aisle, tagging hands with the Richmond crowd. He stops at the foot of the aisleway staring up at Reject who stares over the ropes at him. Leon doesn't look overly concerned though, as Reject predictably backs away when he enters the ring. After an acknowledgement of the cheers, Leon finally notices Maggie at the announce table is understandably distracted. Hands on hips, he thinks about saying something to her, but realises he has to focus on the match and leaves it be. COLE If you don't mind me aski... MAGGIE If it's about me and Leon, I kinda do, yeah. There's enough talk as it is. Uncharacteristic as it is for me to say this, let's just concentrate on the wrestling shall we? COLE Certainly. This promises to be an excellent encounter. And thanks to Reject cashing in his golden envelope earlier on, No Holds Barred to boot! You have to wonder who that'll favour. With half an eye still on Maggie, Leon comes out of his corner as Chioda goes over the now revised rules. Reject spends the whole instructions grinning at Leon, The Silky Smooth One's other half of the eye staring back. COLE If Reject's hoping to get under the skin of Leon Rodez, he'd better think again. *DINGDINGDING!* Chioda calls for the bell and the match begins with Reject getting the jump, running at Leon with a quick boot before firing away with right hands. Back comes Leon with rights to the body to try and fight Reject off, but Reject manages to back him up in the corner and grab the ropes to stomp away. Leon gets a mudhole walked in him until he's slumped against the bottom turnbuckle, Reject breaking away to pose. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Reject wasting no time and with No Holds Barred, holding nothing back in the corner. Brushing off the boos, Reject helps Leon back up in the corner. A sudden switch turns the tables though with Reject caught in the corner and rained in on with right hands! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Reject covers up under the punches until Rodez grabs the arm, whipping him out of the corner. Putting up a foot, Reject avoids hitting the turnbuckles, then jabs an elbow back as Leon charges in behind. Reject quickly hops up to the middle rope with Leon dazed. But not for long, a right to the gut allowing Leon to reach up and slam Reject off the turnbuckles. Holding his back, Reject is then bowled over with a clothesline. And a second. And... he dodges a third, scrambling underneath the ropes and to the floor for a breather. COLE Reject not feeling quite so froggy anymore, but LOOK OUT! The Richmond crowd erupt as Leon joins Reject on the floor with a PESCADO! "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" The Silky Smooth One tries to mount Reject with some right hands, but he's able to shove Leon away and create some distance around the ring. Rodez follows right after Reject though, catching up to him and clubbing him in the back with a forearm. In the ring, referee Chioda is powerless to do anything, as Leon clubs Reject again, before sending him roaring across ringside with a hard irish whip, only the unforgiving barricade stopping Reject's momentum! MAGGIE Looks like Reject made a bad call with that golden envelope of his. Leon isn't such a pushover after all, huh 'R-Man'? COLE We all know and love Leon as the happy-go-lucky entertainer, but he is tough. We're not quite so used to seeing him in these kind of matches. But he held his own admirably against the dominant Heartland Champion, Sandman9000, a few weeks ago in a similar environment. With Reject pulling himself up using the timekeeper's table, Leon climbs up the ring steps and raises a fist to the crowd. He then leaps with a fist drop, catching Reject between the eyes as he gets to his feet! Reject staggers away and ends up slumped over the announce table. COLE Uh-oh, coming our way here. Eagerly, Leon grabs a hold of Reject by the head, pulling him up face-to-face with Maggie... before BOUNCING his skull off the table! The smile on Maggie's face can't help but be noticed, as Reject is then bounced off the table a second time! But Maggie's presence doesn't pay off for Leon, distracted as the two troubled lovers lock eyes... allowing Reject to raise his leg back into Leon's crotch! "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE LOWBLOW! As Leon goes rigid in pain, Reject shakes out the cobwebs. With a wink to Maggie, he then informs her that "I've got this, baby", before he scoops Rodez up and drops him with snake-eyes across the announce table! COLE That momentary distraction cost Leon right there, hate to say it Maggie. MAGGIE Yeah, yeah, I know. Reject bundles Leon back inside and makes a cover... 1... 2... No! Irish whip by Reject, catching Leon on the rebound with a spinning wheel kick. Another cover... 1... 2... No! Reject stomps Rodez a couple of times, before stopping to pose once again. Waiting for Leon to get back up, Reject then feeds him the foot, looking for the Enziguri... NO! Leon ducks! Belly flopping off the mat, Reject walks into Leon's clutches and a release Exploder Suplex in the centre of the ring, for a cover... 1... 2... No! Backing into a corner, Reject manages to lure Leon into a boot before sending him face-first into the turnbuckles. COLE In the midst of the personal issue between these two, we're somewhat forgetting the high stakes here. The winner one step closer to AngleSlam, to $500,000, to a guaranteed World Title shot at any time they so choose for a year! Reject shoos referee Chioda out of the way and looks for an irish whip, corner to corner, only for it to be reversed by Leon. Jumping to the middle rope Reject goes for a crossbody out of the corner... fakes Rodez out... but still misses the crossbody when he finally leaves his perch as Leon deftly sidesteps! Leon quickly exits the ring and heads to the top to the excitement of the Richmond fans. With Reject doubled up in pain, Leon sizes him up as he stands tall on the top rope, waiting for the perfect opportunity to soar with a Steamboat-esque Top Rope Crossbody... ...AND GETTING DROPKICKED IN MID-AIR!! "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE What a counter by Reject! Reject crawls over and hooks a leg tight... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Only two but that dropkick was a thing of beauty. Timing, execution, everything. Despite avoiding the 3 count, Leon is still hurting and holds his ribs as he's pulled to his feet by Reject. A forearm rocks him against the ropes, setting up a clothesline. But Leon ducks, backdropping Reject up and over the top, Reject barely saving himself and landing on the apron. As he pulls himself up though, he sneaks a knee in through the ropes. MAGGIE You know I never realised how close to the ring this table is until there were two guys feet away from crushing us from a great height. COLE You get used to it. MAGGIE ...what's that supposed to mean!? COLE No, I meant... I was referring to being... not... nevermind I'm sorry. Reject gets his bearings and realising where he is, he reaches back into the ring and pulls Rodez out onto the apron with him. Looking down at the arena floor below, the smiling Reject looks set to execute something potentially dangerous which draws worried sounds from the crowd. But Leon fights him off. Shots to the gut connect on Reject, allowing Leon to drop safely to the arena floor. He then scampers back up to the apron, but this time behind Reject, allowing him to lift the Tag Team Champion up... *THUD!* "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" ...AND DROP HIM WITH A BACK SUPLEX ON THE RING APRON!!! COLE OH, MY! Eyes bulging in pain, Reject's back arches as he lays on the hard apron. Leon, having landed safely on the floor, shoves Reject back under the ropes and into the ring. COLE Reject was just drove back first on that ring apron, one of the hardest parts of the ring. What a resourceful move from Leon. And Maggie I get the feeling you enjoyed that. MAGGIE It seems to have stopped Reject from talking, that's no mean feat. With Reject hurt, Leon delays climbing back into the ring, catching a look at Maggie before going over to the ring apron and rummaging under the ring... for a SINGAPORE CANE!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" MAGGIE Well that was convenient! Good folks at home, next time you're wondering 'where do I get me a singapore cane', put down the yellow pages, click off of Google search and find your nearest wrestling show. COLE Logic policing aside, this could be poetic justice for Reject... remember how Sandman9000 busted Leon open with a cane coming to Reject's rescue a few weeks ago. MAGGIE I was there and it wasn't pretty. Thanks for the reminder. 'Ppreciated. Leon juggles with the cane a little before sliding into the ring behind Reject. Still in some serious discomfort Reject struggles to get to his feet, apparently unaware of what's waiting behind him. The Richmond crowd encourage Leon to swing away and he sets himself, waiting for Reject to turn. Getting to his knees, the Tag Champion lets out a moan in pain trying to work the kinks out of his back and starts to crawl his way around towards Leon, who raises the cane up over his head... ...but gets intercepted with ANOTHER LOWBLOW!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Dropping the cane, Leon crumbles to the canvas, as does Reject. COLE Desperation move from Reject! Both men are down, we are going to take a quick, final commercial break... this crucial Money In The Bank Quarter Final Match continues when we come back, don't go anywhere! *COMMERCIAL BREAK!* Back we come to see Reject in control, stomping Leon in the corner and only stopping to nurse his still aching back. COLE Welcome back to Richmond, where the road to AngleSlam and the Money In The Bank contract is still a painful one for Reject and Leon Rodez. And during the commercial break, both these men eager to get their hands on that singapore cane and neither able to connect, with the cane now laying out at reach at ringside. But these two men haven't needed weapons to inflict some serious pain on one another Maggie. MAGGIE No and no weapons is fine by me, since I'm gonna get blamed for whatever crap goes down here whatever happens. Reject slowly pulls Leon up in the corner and sends him across the ring with an irish whip. Massaging the lower back, Reject then follows in looking for a monkey flip. He comes out of the corner but Leon does not, holding onto the ropes. The back of Reject's head bounces off the mat and Leon capitalises with a jacknife pin... 1... 2... No! Both men climb back up and Leon is first to strike, with a jab! COLE Here we go! A jab! A jab! A jab! Rodez turns, blowing the kiss to the crowd, before turning back on his heels... ...into a boot to the gut! Boos shower Reject as he blocks the beloved combo and even more so when he nails Leon with his own jab! Another! A third! And a fourth! Riling up the crowd, Reject turns to the commentary table and blows a kiss towards Maggie, before springing up with a standing dropkick to the BUTT of Leon's jaw! No comment from Maggie, just a scowl up into the ring. Ignoring it, Reject rolls out of the ring past Maggie and goes over to grab himself a steel chair. COLE Reject, who made this match No Holds Barred earlier tonight, now looking to further 'cash in' on that golden envelope. Sliding back in, Reject waits on Leon to get back up... and CRACKS him over the head with the chair! COLE Payback from earlier tonight! And Reject may cash in big after that. Cover... 1... 2... NO! Looking annoyed Reject grabs the chair again, setting it down on the canvas and grabbing Rodez. He positions him over the chair looking for a DDT, but Leon manages to spin out of the facelock and reverse. Leon sends Reject off the ropes with an irish whip, putting his head down for a backdrop, only to get a boot to the shoulder blade to block. With Leon apparently dazed, Reject then backs up into the ropes again... *CLANG!* ...rebounding into a chair flung into his face!! COLE Reject's not going to like that, right in the kisser! MAGGIE Oh, what a shame. Both men are down again, taking the advantage of the chance to clear the cobwebs. "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" Pulling himself off the ropes, Reject walks out towards Leon, who manages to land a boot. Underhooking the arms, Leon sets up a Tiger Driver... but Reject spins out and snares a surprised Silky Smooth One around the head for the EULOGY... NO! Leon counters as he shoves Reject in the back, sending him off the ropes and back into the waiting arms for Blue Thunder... NO! Over the top escapes Reject, landing behind Leon. Waistlock is applied, looking for a German, but Leon blocks with an elbow. Another elbow frees him from the waistlock, allowing him to whip Reject into a corner and deliver Double Knees! Out of the corner staggers Reject, Leon hitting the ropes, tucking and rolling... but Reject ducks the Shack Attack, grabbing Leon around the waist and hitting a Northern Lights Suplex, with a bridge... 1... 2... NO! Rolling away, Reject aims for Leon's head with a spinning heel kick. A quick duck from Leon avoids it and leaves Reject open for a Backslide... 1... 2... No! Reject is up quickly and drops Leon with a clothesline. With Leon down, Reject makes his way over to his lower body and folds up his legs in an indian deathlock formation, threading one arm inside to the legs folded up. Reject then steps to the side looking to turn Leon over onto his front. COLE This is that new submission hold we saw Reject use last week in New York, which I'm reliable told is being called the 'R-Lock' by 'The R-Man'. But can he get it on? Reaching up, Leon grasps onto Reject's leg to try and prevent from being turned over. With a look of annoyance Reject struggles to free his leg and does so, managing to turn Leon over in one swift motion! Before he can lean down on the hold though Leon is able to scuttle forward and reach the ropes. Of course, with No Holds Barred Reject is under no obligation to break the hold. But as Leon starts climbing up the ropes on his hands he loses his leverage anyway, so releases the hold to kick Leon in the back of the head. COLE No go for Reject right there. And he's looking a little bit frustrated I think. Retrieving the steel chair, Reject then opens it up and sits it in the centre of the ring. COLE Now what does Reject have in mind? Encouraging Leon to his feet, Reject stalks with evil intentions. A boot doubles Leon up, allowing Reject to hook him by the head and aim him towards the chair, looking for a running version of the Eulogy... but Leon slips free before even reaching the chair! As Reject puts on the brakes, Leon grabs him by the tights and drags him back, lifting him up... ...AND DROPPING HIM CROTCH-FIRST ACROSS THE BACK OF THE CHAIR!!!! REJECT COLE You might not have to worry about Reject's advances much longer Maggie! Reject hobbles from his very awkward position, right into another one as Rodez dropkicks him in the back to send him sprawling throat-first across the middle rope. Up goes a roar from the Virginia crowd as Leon busts out a very quick jig, before folding up the chair again. Off the far ropes, Leon then uses the chair to add further damage to his body attack to the small of Reject's back! COLE Chair-assisted Call That Bitch Bojangles! As Reject falls off the ropes, Rodez slides away the chair and makes the cover... 1... 2... NO! COLE These two are putting in one hell of an effort here, with so much on the line! $500,000, the Money In The Bank contract, pride, perhaps your affections Maggie... MAGGIE Or not. COLE ...not to mention, the winner advances to meet Krista Isadora Duncan in the semi-finals, with 15% of Theodore Moneymaker's shares in TSM up for grabs! Leaving the ring, Leon goes in search of the singapore cane vacated earlier. Meanwhile, in the ring, Reject retrieves the steel chair, wedging it between the top and middle turnbuckles in a corner. Leon gets the cane to a roar of approval, sliding back into the ring. Still walking very awkwardly, Reject is still able to block the first cane shot with a boot to the gut though. However, mid-sigh of relief, Reject is shocked to see Leon suddenly recover... *THWACK!* ...cane to the back... *THWACK!* ...shot to the shoulder... *THWACK!* ...and one over the head! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" LEON COME ON! COLE And Leon is ALL FIRED UP~! Reject stumbles around in a daze, Leon setting aside the cane and pulling Reject off his feet with a double leg takedown. The crowd rise expecting the Liontamer. But Reject gets his feet planted against Leon's stomach and manages to push him away... sending Leon backwards, hitting the wedged steel chair in the corner behind him! Out stumbles Leon and he gets caught in an inside cradle... 1... 2... NO! COLE Only two! We're seeing great resilience from both of these athletes. We know what stern stuff Leon is made of, and Reject if you get past the arrogance and the shortcuts he's been taking in recent months, a tremendous competitor in his own right. MAGGIE Pity they're both ruled by testosterone. Had to be said. Grabbing the singapore cane, Reject smiles as he looks to hand off some receipts for the shots he just received. He waits for Leon to step his way, lining up with it like a baseball bat and looking to take Leon's head off with a shot... but The Grand Rapids Golden Child saves himself from decapitation by ducking! Spun around in a 360, Reject then lunges forward... CHARGING SHOULDER-FIRST INTO THE CHAIR IN THE CORNER!! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Down goes Reject and Leon quickly signals for the end as he exits the ring. COLE Here we go, could be 450 time! MAGGIE Come on Leon! As Maggie's impartiality and professionalism finally drops, Leon reaches the top. He has to take a second to un-wedge the chair though to actually get on the top rope safely... ...allowing Reject to recover and lunge at the feet, CROTCHING LEON UP TOP!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Sighs of disappointment ring around the arena as Reject looks mighty relieved. Hand pressed against his back, he takes a deep breath before heading up the ropes to follow Leon. He lands a couple of short punches on Leon from the middle rope, before hooking him up for a superplex. From the middle rope apparently isn't enough for Reject though and he re-adjusts his feet onto the top rope. COLE Reject is going ALL the way up! This may not end well for either man! Reject pulls Leon up to his feet as well, precarious on the top rope. Both men hover over perilous drops and it's with much caution that Leon fires off a right hand to the ribs. And a second. Reject wobbles and loses a hold on Leon, who lands a third punch to the gut. Referee Chioda can only look on as both men teeter high above the ring, Leon throwing another punch to the body which finally knocks Reject from his perch... and DOWN, CROTCHED ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!! Feeling the worst possible pain known to man again, Reject is powerless to stop Leon from shoving him in the chest. But Reject doesn't fall from the turnbuckles, his feet getting caught under the turnbuckle leaving him hung upside down in the tree of woe! With Reject stuck, Leon climbs safely back into the ring. Heading for the opposite corner of the ring, Leon then sizes Reject up, ignoring his upside-down pleas for mercy and charging in... hesitating in mid-air before driving a thunderous dropkick into Reject's face!! COLE Wham! Another shot to Reject's precious face, I'm sure Leon enjoyed that. Falling from the tree of woe, Reject is pulled right back up by Rodez and placed right back where he started, sat on the top turnbuckle facing into the crowd. COLE Leon isn't done yet though. MAGGIE Looking at me... I hope this isn't for my benefit, two guys fighting over a woman is so draconian, dude. After the long look at Maggie, Leon steps up onto the middle rope behind Reject. He clubs him in the back with a forearm. And a second. Leon then steps up on top, setting up Reject. Both men stand up top in another precarious position, but this time the only way for both is down, as Leon pulls Reject back with a Back Superplex... ...BUT REJECT TURNS OVER IN MID-AIR AND LANDS ON TOP!!!! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE OH! Counter by Reject, what a sudden reversal of fortunes! MAGGIE See, pride comes before a fall. Rolling off of the groggy Leon, Reject starts to get to his feet. But then he suddenly stops, crawling over and grabbing a hold of the steel chair. He slides it into position before slithering backwards and laying in wait for The Silky Smooth One. COLE Reject, preparing to read Leon his Eulogy. And the Eulogy is the last thing you hear. Slowly, to the sound of thousands of fans warning him of what awaits him, Rodez starts to pull himself back to his feet. Still looking groggy he uses the ropes for help, Reject on one knee and poised. Leon leaves the ropes and as he turns around, he walks right into the springing body of Reject for the EULOGY~1!~... ...NO!! Leon manages to shove Reject off at the last second... the Tag Champion narrowly avoiding a head-on collision with Mike Chioda! Reject starts to apologise to the ref before realising what he's doing, instead berating him for getting in the way and shoving him aside. Turning back around, Reject throws a Roundhouse Kick but Leon ducks it, spinning around himself and connecting with a Rolling Sole BUTT to the midsection. Leon then hooks up Reject in a 3/4 headlock, scaling up the ropes and floating backwards with the shiranui... *WHAM!* ...DRIVING REJECT'S HEAD RIGHT DOWN INTO THE STEEL CHAIR!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Feedback THIS, into the chair! Reject is OUT! Figuring there's no harm in making sure though, Leon pulls himself through the bottom and middle ropes. Reject lays in position as Leon scales the turnbuckles. He reaches the top, not wasting any time this time as he gets his footing and soars with the 450 SPLASH!! MAGGIE Score! Hook of the leg, the crowd up on their feet to count along... 1... COLE Four... 2... COLE ...Fifty... 3!!!! COLE ...and out! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" *DINGDINGDING!* Leon drops Reject's leg and rolls off him with a sigh of relief, arm raised weekly in victory. BUFFER Here is your winner, advancing in the Money In The Bank Tournament... LLLLLEEEEEOOOOOOONN... RRRRRROOOOOOODDEEEEEEZZZZZZ!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" With the ropes for help again, Leon pulls himself up with the adrenaline giving way to pain pretty quickly. Leon still manages to pump a fist to the people who applaud his hard-fought victory. At the announce table, Maggie is up and applauds her boyfriend with the crowd, Leon taking a look her way but certainly not rushing over to join her in his celebrations. COLE These two men, whether it was for Maggie's benefit, for the Money In The Bank contract and the $500,000 in the pocket, or probably a mixture of the two, put it all out there here tonight. But in the end, Leon Rodez gains a measure of revenge on Reject and he advances, one step closer to AngleSlam! What's left of Reject's energy rolls him out of the ring and he lies on the outside battered and beaten. The ring is left to Leon, who scales the turnbuckles on one side and gives the best bow his body will allow him. Leon slumps back to the ring... ...and as his celebrations continue, the view changes. Still we see Leon celebrating his win, but on the screen of a television monitor tuned in to the show. The camera pans out from the TV to reveal the lavish dressing room of one Krista Isadora Duncan! There she sits with a glass of something alcoholic in hand (of course), feet kicked up on a sidetable. On a sofa across from her sits her daughter Jade, who it's fair to say doesn't look overly thrilled with her uncle's victory. Setting down the drink, Krista watches the screen, watching Leon work the Virginia crowd and smiles as she starts to casually buff her nails. KRISTA Well, this ought to be interesting. FADE TO BLACK © 2008 OAOAST Entertainment
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ANGLESLAM Shill Center Until we select an official theme song, fun summertime music with a western flair welcomes us inside OAOAST studios where Tony Brannigan (who’s traded in his blazer for a Hawaiian shirt) stands on the right side of a sunset backdrop many would recognize from our previous AS logo while the new logo along with time/date is seen on the left. BRANNIGAN Here to shill the 2008 edition of Angleslam on HeldDOWN~!, I’m Tony Brannigan. The sun may be setting on the summer, but the OAOAST plans on sending it out with a bang Sunday night, August 31st from the Alamodome in my hometown of San Antonio, Texas. Now the event is already sold out, but you can still catch all the action exclusively on pay-per-view from the comfort on your own home. MONEY IN THE BANK TOURNAMENT FINALS Winner to receive guaranteed OAOAST Championship match and $500,000 BRANNIGAN One of the matches on tap for that big event will determine who receives a HALF-A-MILLION DOLLARS from tournament sponsor Theodore Moneymaker’s own pocketbook -- but more importantly a guaranteed contract to face whoever the OAOAST Champion is. It should be noted this contact can be used, or cashed in, so to speak, at anytime, meaning we could see the champ successfully DEFEND and LOSE the title all in the same night! A tactic the previous Money in the Bank winner Landon Maddix employed to win the OAOAST Championship from Zack Malibu last June. MR. DICK vs. BARON WINDELS BRANNIGAN How about this one? In front of the hometown faithful, Baron Windels to get another crack at former partner Mr. Dick. This all stems from the incident that occurred one week ago at the Big Apple Spectacular that left Baron Windels not just bloody and bruised...but humiliated! OAOAST BACKTRACKER Courtesy: Big Apple Spectacular BRANNIGAN Although both happen to reside in the River City, there’s little doubt as to who the hometown favorite will be, something Mr. Dick knows very well. Have a listen. The Alamo at night serves as the backdrop for Mr. Dick and OAOAST Women’s Champion Malaysia. MR. DICK Whoever said you can’t go home again was exactly right, because it won’t be a homecoming when I return to the town where I was a high school football hero a villain. I’ll still compete in front of a packed house, but the adulation of the fans will be reversed for one man, Baron Windels. (scoffs) What a glutton for punishment this guy is, Malaysia. No matter how bad I beat him he keeps coming back for more, which is good for a couple of people who love to inflict pain like us. A pain that’s as much mental as it is physical because let’s face it: Baron can’t handle The Dick. He tries like a Special Olympian, but in the end he’s still a retard! MALAYSIA MR. DICK Just as the Alamo was the last stand for William Travis and his men, the Alamodome will be yours Baron. It’s time for Mr. Dick to move on to bigger and better things without having to drag you along for the ride as I did all those years we teamed. Win, lose or draw, it ends for you at Angleslam. We cut back to Tony Brannigan in the studio. BRANNIGAN I for one cannot wait to see that encounter Sunday night, August 31st. Oh, my, and let’s not forget this big one, where get this -- the only win to win is by rendering your opponent DEFENSELESS! NO ROPE BARBED WIRE FLUORESCENT LIGHTBULB TUBES HELL IN A CELL MATCH James "Lunar Phoenix" Cone vs. Sly Sommers BRANNIGAN As you’ll recall, because James Cone can legally turn down a match against anyone ranked lower than him in the Top 10, Sly Sommers was unable to get a match with his nemesis so he handpicked young -- and winless -- Cooper Riley to meet Cone at the Big Apple Spectacular. If Riley was somehow able to pull off the upset then Sommers would face Cone in a match of his choosing at Angleslam. Here is how it all went down. Courtesy: Big Apple Spectacular BRANNIGAN Also on the card… INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE NO DISQUALIFICATION MATCH Colin Maguire, Jr vs. Jereme Grey BRANNIGAN Be sure to stay tuned to the OAOAST television networks for more information regarding Angleslam. It’s the hottest event of the summer and it comes to you LIVE exclusively on pay-per-view Sunday night, August 31st. With gas prices reported at record highs across this great land of ours, stay in and beat the pain at the pump -- and the heat! -- with 3 hours of nonstop entertainment the whole family will love. Don’t you dare miss Angleslam! COMMERCIAL NEXT SECOND ROUND MONEY IN THE BANK MATCH LEON RODEZ VS REJECT THE MAINEVENT
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-The screen cuts in to OAOAST President JOSIE BAKER's office!~! The fans erupt when they see their favorite president standing in her office, pacing around, Sophie Grey following every step. JOSIE ...and therein lies the problem, Sophie... SOPHIE Si l'affaire tombe à travers, le titre retourne. JOSIE Exactly...it's either that, or we send Jereme to SJPW. SOPHIE Bien, Mme Baker... nous pouvons toujours garder le titre comme un titre d'OAOAST... -Josie stops pacing and turns to her assistant, her eyes now completely serious. She stares at Sophie for awhile, before pointing at her. JOSIE Say that again? SOPHIE Gardez le titre, mais tournez-le dedans à un titre d'OAOAST... JOSIE ... -Josie suddenly springs forward, kissing Sophie hard on the lips. Not a lesbian one, mind you, but, you know...a friendly kiss. She breaks away quickly, smiling wide. JOSIE Vous foutue fille brillante, vous! Call your brother in here! -Sophie smiles, before running over to the desk, pushing a button on the intercom. SOPHIE Jereme? Pouvez-vous entrer satisfaites-vous ici? Merci. -A few moments pass before the door opens, and in limps Jereme Grey!! The fans erupt as Jereme weakly smiles at his cousin and sister, who are both grinning like idiots. Jereme sits in the nearest chair, looking between the two. JEREME ...What the hell are you two so happy about? -Josie walks over to her desk and leans against it, staring at Jereme. JOSIE The deal with SJPW fell through. -Jereme is confused. JEREME ...and that's bon to you? That's the news? JOSIE It's either we give up the title, or you go to SJPW... JEREME ...Yeah, I don't follow ya for merde, Josie... JOSIE Your sister had an idea. -Jereme looks over Sophie, who gives the thumbs up. Jereme looks even more confused as he turns his attention to Josie. JOSIE So...at AngleSlam, you will NOT be facing Colin Maguire, Jr. for the SJPW Cruiserweight Title. -The fans erupt in boos as Jereme nods his head, disappointed. Josie's grin gets even wider. JOSIE Instead...you will be facing Colin Maguire, Jr....in a No DQ match at AngleSlam... -Jereme stares at his cousin, hanging on her every word. JOSIE ...for the OAOAST INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE! -The fans erupt!! Jereme smiles wide as he looks at his SJPW title belt. Josie puts her hand on his shoulder. JOSIE ...but that means you are now representing the OAOAST...so I expect you to do your best EVERY time. -Jereme chuckles and nods. He stands quickly and shakes Josie's hand, before nodding to Sophie, who smiles wide at her brother as he walks out of the room. Josie turns to Sophie. JOSIE Call Mr. Kobayashi and tell him, "Au revoir, dipshit." -Fade to black. COMMERCIAL