King Cucaracha

Okay, I'm putting the deadline for the show back to Sunday, partly because of Halloween taking up people's time, partly because I ain't gonna be around to do anything about anything until then. Everyone take note and use the time accordingly. Note: Dressing up in a costume and going door to door asking strangers for sweets does not class as accordingly unless you're under 12.

CM Punk worked for ROH!? Are you sure? They never mention it.

*PATTY'S AMAZING ENTRANCES!* Amazing indeed as the festive pumpkin patch on the entry way becomes for more disturbing and far more spooky due in no small part to the thick white substance that gushes up like a geyser from beneath the leaves. Above this spontaneous and horrific ejaculation yellow pyro rains down from the ceiling in an epic pyro fall. The musical accompaniment comes from the enraged booing of the Miami audience as well as the perverse lyrics of Mister Dick's entrance song [i]My dick locked in a cage, right Your dick suffer from stage fright My dick: so hot its stolen Your shit look like Gary Coleman My dick pink and big Your dick stinks like shit My dick got a Caesar do Your dick needs a tweezer dude[/i] A brilliant white pyro wall explodes on stage, overtaking the golden shower as well as the erection ruining semen geysers. With the wall "My dick" fades into [url="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZSLIq6YiRY"]Britney's Womanizer[/url] [i]Womanizer, woman-womanizer You're a womanizer Oh womanizer, Oh you're a womanizer baby You, you, you are You, you, you are Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer[/i] Onto the stage, through a renewed and vigorous golden shower comes a white robe clad Mister Dick. The jeers are plentiful from the sold out audience, his sensual grinding in hip gyrations doing nothing to win over an angered fanbase. Outraging the crowd even more, The Human Hard On rips away his robe and gyrates his hip to showcase his prime asset that bulges through what's barely big enough to qualify as clothing. From behind him, the leather bound Malaysia, reaches through a legs and grabs a handful of his precious meat. They both purr in orgasmic pleasure, completely lost to the world around them. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen the following intergender tag match is scheduled for one fall with a televised time limit of thirty minutes! Now making their way to the ring, introducing first from Edmon, Alberta, Canada, she is the ultimate combination of beauty and beatdowns, she is Malaysia Nerdly! And her partner from San Antonio, Texas, he is a former OAOAST tag team champion, he is The Human Hard On, and a cocky prick, he is MISTER DICK!!! Strutting down the entrance ramp Mister Dick's muscular derriere jiggles like a jello mold from the constant thwacks Malaysia delivers to it from her whip. The Cocky Prick is in seventh heaven from such abuse, smiling one of the broadest smiles he's yet smiled. COLE This feud started quite some time ago when Malaysia Nerdly was challenged for the women's title by Jade in an effort to impress her mother. COACH Ain't no one ever told me how no chick with a star on the walk of fame is s'posed to get impressed by a belt so useless all of the competitors up and disappeared in 2006 and no one gave a god damn. Krista probably more impressed when Maya pants some kid at the bus stop. COLE As I was saying, Jade won the title from Malaysia at Angleslam the same night Krista won the Money In The Bank contract from Landon Maddix. The next night Mister Dick interrupted her coronation ceremony as Miss Money in the bank rambling the complete nonsense we've come to expect from anyone. Since then these two have competed in a posedown, fought at Zero Hour, and constantly traded insults back and forth leading to this major matchup. The first time a mother and daughter have ever teamed up in sports entertainment history! Mister Dick slides into the ring, where he furiously humps the ring mat as white lights swirl around the outside. Malaysia stands with a pointed heel on his back, scowling at the camera but infinitely delighted with her man's self pleasuring humping. COLE Its interesting how the OAOAST works. Jock Mulligan began has career as a silent, respectful, moderately dressed cowboy struggling to make a name for himself. Now, he's a vulgar, mean spirited jerk and we can see his cock ring through his tights. [color="#FF0000"][b][i]DJ’s spinning up my favorite song, hurry up and get a grove on. Light fantastic and it wont be long, don’t let the moment slip away. Cause you and I could find a pleasure, no one else has ever known. Feels like it is now or never, don’t want to be alone[/i][/b][/color] [color="#4169E1"][b][i]When I grow up I wanna be famous, I wanna be a star, I wanna be in movies When I grow up I wanna see the world, drive nice cars, I wanna have groupies When I grow up, be on tv, people know me, be on magazines When I grow up, Fresh and clean, number one chick when I step out on the scene[/i][/b][/color] The mixture of In My Arms and When I Grow Up brings a hugegarnguntanenormousgiganticmassivelargebig cheer from the jam packed arena! They, however, don't get to see their favorite mother daughter duo quite as soon as they might like. Yet. they're still given the visually appeasing sight of a bevy of female dancers, scantily clad for the Halloween occasion as zombofied sex pots. They perform a seductive haunting dance, their attempts to "gnaw" each others flesh turned sensual and arousing. But all that comes to a close when the following tune hits. [i]That this is thriller, thriller night 'Cause I can thrill you more than any ghost would dare to try Girl, this is thriller, thriller night So let me hold you tight and share a killer, diller, chiller, Thriller here tonight[ 'Cause this is thriller, thriller night There ain't no second chance against the thing with forty eyes, girl You know it's thriller, thriller night You're fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight [/i] With perhaps the greatest song in pop history blasting through the arena, the dancers engage in the legendary 80's dance the song made famous. Through their jerky movements, leg kicks, and stomps, Jade awkwardly maneuvers her way onto stage. Though dressed for the macabre occasion with a black cheerleader outfit, Little Miss California has a terrible time of keeping up with the stylized movements of the dancers. Her mom, costumed like Michael Jackson from the video with red pants and a flashy red leather vest, has no such difficulties and expertly leads the dance line as orange pyro sparklers flare from every corner of the video screen. Hoping to just get lost in wealth of barely dressed body, Jade tries to faintly mimic her mama's flashy soul train worthy dance moves. That is until Krista's movements see her grind her booty against the crotch of one highly attractive zombie. COACH The hell? Krista's looks like Alvin Ailey, and her daughter up there lookin like Papa Smurf down crawled up her granny panties! COLE Well, Krista used to be a dancer for Guns N Roses, so its not fair to compare Jade The anguish doesn't stop on the entrance ramp for Jade! A notoriously mobile dance, the Thirller carries the lovely zombies and the gorgeous queen of pop grooving down a ramp that's decorated in dazzling black and orange glitter. The Women's Champion simply settles for waving around her pom-poms and hoping she can match the beat of the song. BUFFER And the opponents, introducing first from Los Angeles, California, she is the OAOAST Women's Champion, Little Miss California, JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN! And her mother, also from Los Angeles, she is a New York Times best selling author, a fitness queen, an inductee into the Hollywood Walk of Fame, star of the world famous FIT with KID line of exercise videos in addition to being the star of the VH1 reality show The Look of Love, she is the OAOAST's Miss Money In The Bank… "MISS CALIFORNIA"... KRISTA ISADORAAAAAA DDUUUUUUUUUUUNNCAN!!!! COACH Scust at Jade leeching off her mother's success. She lettin being a celeb's kid go to her head. You didn't see Liv Tyler trynna get on Walk This Way with Aerosmith? Did Kate Hudson try and get a spot in Goldie Hawn's Death Becomes Her? Naw this shit ain't proper Krista style. This is pro wrestling style, where just 'cause someone's related they gotta tag with you, you know Krista ain't want nothing to do with this. Wearing pants, Krista has no reason to bother with her upside down leg hanging trick. Thus she invites Jade to take over the role. Jade isn't exactly enamored with such duty, but Kris' constant prodding leaves her no choice. Unfortunately, she almost tangles herself in the ropes, causing a sympathetic mother to quickly free her highly embarrassed daughter. COACH Good grief. Mr. Dick encourages either of his opponent's to 'come get me', in a far too open stance considering his ring attire. *DINGDINGDING!* KRISTA Okay, rock paper scissors. JADE ...Mom... I can't start again him! KRISTA We'll let rock paper scissors be the judge of that young lady. It's a time honoured tradition, I'll have you know. One, two, SHOW! Much to Jade's horror, she produces paper to Krista's scissors and despite her annoyance at losing, Krista leaves the ring in the spirit of the game. Jade wonders if this is some kind of joke or test, but apparantly it's not as when questioned, Krista simply shrugs her shoulders and reminds Jade that rock paper scissors never lies. COACH Alright, here we go, let's wrestle already. COLE I don't think Krista has quite thought through this dilemma of mixing family ties with tag team partnership so well. That might work with Alix, but this is a little different. COACH Yeah, Alix didn't stink up the ring. Jade eventually gives up arguing, as Mr. Dick starts to close in towards he. He swipes out trying to grab a hold of her, but Jade is able to duck out of the way. Escaping, she almost runs right into the opposition corner where Malaysia is waiting. Quickly she turns away, into Mr. Dick... who again misses with an attempted grab, Jade ducking underneath and VERY quickly running to her corner to tag in Krista. Which is good enough for KID, grabbing the top rope and swinging herself in with a deft kick to Mr. Dick's jaw! COLE Well now we're offically underway. Shaking off the kick, Mr. Dick gets back to his feet and charges at Krista. He fancies his chances too with Krista's attention taken by a speck of dirt on the ring ropes. But as Mr. Dick lunges towards her in the corner, Krista oh so casually takes a step to her left, leaving MD to crash into the turnbuckles. Mr. Dick staggers comically off the buckles and once she realises what's happened, a sighing Krista calls him to a halt. KRISTA Honey, honey, hold up one tic. MR. DICK Screw you ya old hag! KRISTA Slow your roll, hear me out here Jockie. Now, if you don't buck your ideas up real quick, this could get mighty embarrassing for you. Diving at me in a corner? I mean... did you think that I wouldn't move for some reason? That the shock of you flying through the air would trap me in temporary rigamortis, renderring me physically unable to move? Or maybe I'd be blinded by the bright lights shining off of your quite frankly ridiculously oiled body? Snapping to his senses, Mr. Dick quits listening to Krista's diatribe and throws a kick at her... which gets caught. KRISTA Now see, this is why I win all the time, you're all just so predictable. Wait, wait, don't tell me, next thing you're going to jump up and try to hit me with some enziguri, no? Already starting to duck from it, see? Hopping on his standing foot, an increasingly agitated Mr. Dick takes a swing at Krista. But Krista weaves her head back easily. KRISTA You know what, I... I just can't deal with you any longer. Krista drags Mr. Dick by the leg and tags in Jade. Looking confused, Jade steps into the ring and is handed the foot by her mother. Once everyone gets over their confusion, Jade is left looking at the foot wondering what to do. And a devious smile forms on Mr. Dick's face, as he leaps up and lands an ENZIGU... NO! Jade ducks! KRISTA *slaps forehead* COLE Oh dear. Thoroughly embarrassed, Mr. Dick is then thoroughly flattened, as Krista tags herself back in and lands a springboard crossbody... 1... 2... No! Scrambling to his feet, Mr. Dick aims a big clothesline at Krista's head. Already rolling her eyes KID ducks it and throws her arms up in frustration at what she's having brought to her. Going through the motions she leapfrogs The Human Hard On as he comes back off the ropes. Mr. Dick puts on the brakes, turning around into an inverted atomic drop. Krista then throws the Superkick... but Mr. Dick bails out of Krista's Great California Adventure by catching the foot and tripping her on her face! COLE Ooh! Not many times will you see Krista falling flat on her face. And even less without immediate and painful vengeance to follow! With Krista checking her prized facial features, Mr. Dick hauls her to her feet, delivering a hard right hand. And a second. And then a third. Krista falls against the ropes, where Mr. Dick pulls up his tiny short shorts before applying a choke. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" Clean break. Well, sort of, a clean break and a pieface on the referee. COACH Mr. Dick just choking the life out of the award winning OAOAST member. He really ought to think about getting some less restrictive ring gear, the boys must be bulging in there! Mr. Dick pulls Krista off the ropes and nails her with a forearm, then whips her across the ring. As she rebounds the ever agile Krista manages to tuck and roll underneath Mr. Dick's planned attack though. Quickly to her feet, she leaps up looking for a Hurricanrana... but Mr. Dick counters, flipping Krista onto her feet. He then runs into an armdrag. And a second. Krista goes for a third, but Mr. Dick puts his other hand down on the mat to steady himself before dragging Krista back up with the arms still linked. With a handful of hair he hauls Krista right back down though, applying a top wristlock on the mat. Krista looks in danger, for all of two seconds. That's when she rolls backwards to her feet and gets Mr. Dick over with the third armdrag anyway. COACH You see that Jade? That's what you've got to live up to! Start praying. Hard. As she looks to follow up, Krista is surprised by a legsweep. Keeping hold of a leg, Mr. Dick swings around and looks to lock KID up in a figure four... only for Krista to reach up and hook him into an inside cradle... 1... 2... NO! COLE Let's not forget, Mr. Dick has promised to not only beat Krista tonight but to make her submit. We'll see how that works out for him. Back up, Krista is caught with a knee and locked in an abdominal stretch. It doesn't take Mr. Dick long to look for an added advantage though and he reaches out for the ropes, which referee Charles Robinson breaks away with a kick! The shock allows Krista to twist out of the hold and start twisting something else, those being Mr. Dick's NIPPLES!! "YYYEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" MR. DICK :O COACH AAHH! COLE Krista with some serious schoolyard level sooning going on! The purple nurples! Trapped in the dreaded titty twister, Mr. Dick backs into a corner and wraps his leg around the middle rope forcing a break. Krista lets Mr. Dick go without taking his nipples with her as a souvenir, much to her disappointment. She instead settles for his tears as he runs off and tags Malaysia into the match, before rolling to the floor to dump a bottle of water over his chest. Stepping in, Malaysia seems angry and marches right towards Krista, who finds herself in a tough position... and thinks fast, APPLYING THE TITTY TWISTER AGAIN!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH OH! I WILL NEVER WASH THIS CROTCH AGAIN!! With Malaysia backed in a corner, Krista looks around to see her eldest daughter covering her face in shame. Strangely that doesn't seem to bother Krista though as she looks to the crowd for approval instead. Her eyes suddenly bulge though when she finally looks up at Malaysia, staring down at her with a smile. MALAYSIA Harder! KRISTA Uhm... uh... anything for a lady! As Malaysia lets out a moan of pleasure even Krista looks a little weirded out by her opponent which is saying something. With the nipple lock still applied she backs towards her corner, dragging Malaysia with her... allowing Jade to come off the top with a crossbody block!! 1... 2... No! Malaysia gets to her feet and goes after Jade, who escapes to the apron, allowing the still legal Duncan (in the ring that is, I know there's a lot of nipple twisting going on but try to focus, please!) to pull her down with a schoolgirl roll-up... 1... 2... No! Krista catches hold of Malaysia getting up, whipping her into a corner. There's just time for Krista to pull out an eye-popping grind to get herself facing the right way, before she follows in and delivers a dropkick in the corner! Backflipping, Krista lands on her feet just for good measure. And the infallible Krista then sidesteps Mr. Dick rushing towards her. Keeping on running, Mr. Dick has finally had enough and throws the STIFF KICK at innocent little Jade standing on the apron... but she narrowly avoids it and Mr. Dick lands CROTCHED on the top rope!! COLE Looks like Jade's picked up her mother's ability to avoid poorly telegraphed attacks from opponents. On orders from mother, Jade grabs one of Mr. Dick's ankles as Krista grabs the other. On three, mother and daughter then combine IN RUNNING MR. DICK CROTCH FIRST DOWN THE LENGTH OF THE RING ROPES!!!!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE Holy rope burn, Batman! COACH Oh the humanity! If they tear the crotch out of those shorts they're gonna have to pull us off the air. With Mr. Dick's eyes watering he's dragged backwards a few more agonising paces before the Duncans finally let him go. Tumbling off the ropes he curls up on the arena floor in the very worst pain known to man. Meanwhile, Malaysia stalks behind Krista waiting to strike and charges her with a double axehandle. Jade quickly warns Mommy though and she catches Malaysia with a quick go-behind. Up onto the top rope goes Malaysia and it's the same again as Jade and Krista drag her right the way down the ropes! But, far from being in pain, Malaysia just rubs her crotch and grins. MALAYSIA Again! KRISTA Uhm... uh... sure thing! Krista and Jade drag Malaysia back, halfway down the ring, before Jade comes to a stop. Grabbing a hold of Malaysia's arm, the Women's Champion drags her off the top, sending her crashing right into Mr. Dick on the arena floor! KRISTA What did you do that for!? JADE She was enjoying it. KRISTA So was I! Always prone to grumpiness, Krista walks away with her hands on her hips. On the outside Mr. Dick and Malaysia start to pick themselves up so Krista gets back to business and hits the ropes. Yelling at Jade to pull the ropes down she narrowly avoids wiping her daughter out, Jade just getting the message in time and ducking down ALLOWING KRISTA TO SOAR OUT ONTO THE OPPOSITION WITH A NO HANDS SOMERSAULT PLANCHA!!!! "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" KRISTA Naw naw, that ain't nearly loud enough! [b]"KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!"[/b] KRISTA Come on, make me use the italics people! [i][b]"KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!"[/b][/i] KRISTA There we go! Okay, your turn sweetie! Much to Jade's surprise Krista waves for her to follow her lead and take a dive. Despite her clear misgivings the Women's Champion carefully turns around on the apron and prepares to jump. But Krista steps out in front of her shaking her head like an agitated film director, pointing Jade to the top rope. Jade protests, but Krista is hearing none of it and even threatens a reduction in pocket money, to which she rightly points out she earns plenty as a wrestler anyway. But a mother's pride is a valuable thing and eventually Jade finds herself climbing the turnbuckles. COLE I'm not so sure about this. This is not, in any way shape or form, Jade's kind of preferred territory. Krista holds Mr. Dick and Malaysia in headlocks while Jade slowly gets to the top. Once there the Women's Champion takes an eternity to get her feet set though. With her daughter struggling, Krista rams MD and Malaysia's heads together before climbing the apron to give her a helping hand. What Jade wasn't expecting though was for those helping hands to grab a hold of her cheerleader uniform AND ROCKET LAUNCH HER OFF THE TOP OUT ONTO MR. DICK AND MALAYSIA ON THE ARENA FLOOR!!!!!! "YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN TAKING FLIGHT! COACH Some mothers teach their daughters how to read. Others, how to apply make-up. Krista Isadora Duncan teaches Jade how to dive off the top rope onto a guy with a giant penis and his masochist girlfriend. Picking herself up, Jade looks a little shell-shocked but gives the signal that she's okay. She then throws Malaysia back inside to follow up. An irish whip takes great effort but Jade gets it off and executes a not so graceful dropkick on Malaysia on the rebound. Cover... 1... No! Krista demands a tag and on the exchange, she tells her daughter to watch how it should be done. The irish whip is easier for Krista and so is the dropkick, landing on one knee and striking a hot b-boy pose for all her homies back in Holly-hood! COACH I find that disrespectful! Cover by Krista, Jade trying not to let being shown up get to her... 1... 2... No! As Mr. Dick climbs to the apron, Krista is drawn towards him by the overwhelming urge to smack him in the face. Which she does, knocking him back to the floor. Krista then turns around and sees Malaysia in trouble, running in and looking to hit KIDology... ...but Malaysia takes a step forward and catches Krista with a Bossman-style Slam to counter!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Wow, great reaction move by the former Women's Champion. Malaysia stalks over Krista with her eyes gleaming, but Mr. Dick is back up and demanding the tag. He gets it, although from the strength of it it seems Malaysia isn't happy at having Krista taken from her so quickly. With Krista down holding her ribs, Mr. Dick steps over her pointing the finger at Jade, shouting some pretty unflattering things in her direction. The Human Hard On then grabs a hold of Krista's legs, turning her over into a Boston Crab! COLE And now Mr. Dick looking for that submission! Is he really going to be the first man, or woman, to make Krista Isadora Duncan submit in her OAOAST career!? COACH Oh how I hope so. Krista would never be able to show her face again in the OAOAST. And Mr. Dick would never stand so proud! Encouraging KID to "tap like the bitch you are", whatever that means, Mr. Dick sits back with the crab. Krista shakes her head vehemently refusing to quit but it's clear she's in plenty of pain. Seeing this, Jade cautiously enters the ring. With Mr. Dick distracted by his attempts to draw the precious submission, Jade is able to walk right up in front of him, waiting for the big Texan to look up... before SLAPPING him across the face!! The crowd cheer, very briefly, until The Cocky Prick lets Krista go and chases Jade out of the ring. The Women's Champion isn't safe there though, as Malaysia drops from the apron and lays her out with a clothesline!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Mr. Dick swaggers back with a big smile on his face... but walks right into Krista's boot and a taste of LIFE IN THE FAB LANE!!! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Krista waves Mr. Dick up, preparing to launch into some kind of diatribe, but hitting the deck courtesy of a Malaysia Nerdly sneak attack! COACH Did I see that right? Did someone just shut Krista up? Why can't that happen everytime? COLE Because most OAOAST wrestlers are dumb and just stand there standing at her breasts as soon as she starts talking? COACH Wait, how is that 'dumb' exactly? Ain't that how you treat all bitches? As Krista lays stricken on the mat, Mr. Dick and Malaysia lock eyes and LOCK LIPS, entering an impromptu game of tonsil hockey in the middle of the match. The long, lingering love-in continues as Krista shakes out the cobwebs, looking up and raising an eyebrow in disgust. Krista gives them time to break it up, tapping them on the shoulder only to be shooed away. Her protests of "hey, guys, we're in the middle of a wrestling match here ya know" seem strangely hypocritical. Maybe why they don't listen. KRISTA Are all heterosexual couples this nauseating? ROBINSON I don't know. KRISTA Well, why would you? No hetero. (looks back) Ugh. Okay, time! Dropping to her knees, Krista reaches out and clamps a big Blue Ball Special on Mr. Dick! But, strangely, Mr. Dick doesn't seem at all surprised or bothered at the invasion of his private areas and continues swapping spit with Malaysia anyway! COLE Okay, this just got incredibly weird. COACH JUST!? Despite Krista's efforts to twist and crank on the... uhm... 'hold', pain simply doesn't register with Mr. Dick. The only one who seems to be bothered by the whole thing is Jade, who picks herself up on the floor and begins to regret doing so when she sees what her mother is doing. Caught red handed, as it were, Krista holds her hands up and tries to insist she wasn't doing anything wrong. Besides attempting to cripple Mr. Dick by squeezing his junk really hard that is. JADE :huh: KRISTA Okay, so you caught me grabbing some guy's penis in front of tens of thousands of people inside a wrestling ring. Trust me, it could be a lot worse. Look, are you just gonna stand there judging me or are you gonna come in here and help me break this up? Sliding into the ring, Jade assists Krista in prising Malaysia and Mr. Dick's lips apart (an unnervingly tough task in itself), before cracking their heads together! Jade and Krista then join hands (much to Jade's disgust) and nail Malaysia with a double clothesline! The Duncan clan then turn their attentions to Mr. Dick, who seems to be worried about a chipped tooth. KRISTA Okay, slam him. JADE What!? KRISTA You slam him, then I come off the top. JADE I... don't think I can. KRISTA Ugh... it's always SOMETHING, isn't it!? Fine, we'll do something incredibly mundane like a Double DDT or something. But if it makes it into the highlights video of this match then you'll carry the blame to your grave young lady. COACH Krista's contempt for her daughter's wrestling ability is something to behold. See, I was onto something! COLE I don't think there's any contempt at all. COACH Bitch, please. She's like the Meg Griffin of the Duncan family. And nobody likes Meg. As Mr. Dick turns around, Jade and Krista just about hit their boots at the same time, then plant him on his head with that highlight-reel unworthy Double DDT! Poor Krista can't even bring herself to celebrate or gloat or even dance about the move, hanging her head in shame at ripping off The Heavenly Rockers of all people. JADE High-five! KRISTA Not on your life. Here, grab my leg and flip me before people start flipping the channel on us. Doing as she's told, Jade assists KID in executing a standing moonsault on Mr. Dick, staying on with the cover... 1... 2... Kickout! As Krista pulls Mr. Dick up, Jade rushes over and cuts off Malaysia. At least she attempts to, able to land a handful of shots before Malaysia grabs a hold of her cheerleader skirt, lifting the Women's Champion off her feet and hanging her up across the top rope! Meanwhile, Krista comes off the ropes with a spinning heel kick, sending Mr. Dick spiralling out of the ring and to the floor. COLE I was all set to say the referee's lost complete control of this match, but I'm not sure he ever had it to begin with. When Krista's in there, rules and conventions tend to go out the window. With a completely unneccessary roll backwards to her feet and a bow... and a collection of an imaginary, invisible bouqet of flowers thrown from the audience... Krista runs at Malaysia but takes a boot. Malaysia reaches down and grabs a hold of Krista's waist, muscling her up over her shoulder with impressive power, looking for her unnamed 'piledriver variation of death or at the very least a sore neck for a few days'. But complicated move set-ups and Krista simply do not mix and she slithers down the back to safety. Krista then dodges out of the way, allowing Jade to hook Malaysia down with a Running Sleeper Drop!! COLE Sweet Dreams, Malaysia Nerdly! Cover by Jade, Krista standing guard... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Oh, so close! COACH Was Krista seriously going to stand back and let Jade take the glory!? Was I seeing that right!? Is that really Krista Isadora Duncan, attention whore, standing in that ring!? What is going on?!?! Holding her neck, Jade pulls Krista up as the mother and daughter set up another double team manoeuver. Jade locks on a cobra clutch and holds Malaysia in place while Krista hits the ropes... ...but a trip from the outside by Mr. Dick puts pay to that! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh come on, from the outside, Mr. Dick! Grabbing onto the leg again Mr. Dick hauls Krista out of the ring with a hard THUD on the ringside mats. He then traps Krista in a boston crab again, with no ropes for Krista to use for an escape! In the ring meanwhile, Malaysia breaks out of the cobra clutch and whips Jade off the ropes. Jade is able to duck underneath a clothesline and grabs hold of her opponent's head, looking for Got It From My Momma (reverse x-factor)... but Malaysia breaks apart the hands and turns around, driving a knee to the ribs! Malaysia then gutwrenches Jade up across her shoulder, carrying her around in the Canadian Backbreaker... ...AND DROPPING HER WITH THE PILEDRIVER!!!!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE Malaysia with the piledriver on the Women's Champion and no-one kicks out of that! COACH Oh this is too perfect! Malaysia lays atop of Jade, stroking her hair with a cruel smile... 1... 2... 3!!! COLE Krista nowhere to be seen and this one is over! *DINGDINGDING!* Still trapped in the boston crab, Krista probably has no idea what's happened as Mr. Dick finally releases her, to join Malaysia in the ring for some more sloppy celebrations. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winners of the match... the team of MALAYSIA NERDLY and MR. DICK!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" COACH The Duncans LOSE! They LOST! And wouldn't you know it, Jade LOST the match because Mommy couldn't save her! I... I just want to take a second to soak in this moment. *deep breath* Aaaaaahh. COLE Well Mr. Dick didn't get the submission he wanted, but Malaysia Nerdly pins the Women's Champion to pick up the somewhat surprise victory for her team. Barely able to keep their hands off of each other, Mr. Dick and Malaysia leave to continue their celebrations in a more private (we can hope) setting. Picking herself up on the floor, Krista holds the small of her back as she rolls into the ring. She scowls as Mr. Dick turns back to the ring and raises his arms victoriously, kneeling next to her eldest daughter who's barely moved since the bell rang. COLE I get the feeling we haven't heard the last of this. COACH Of course we haven't Michael. Malaysia just pinned the Women's Champion, we ain't gonna hear the end of that until she's rightfully gotten her belt back. And Mr. Dick didn't get all he wanted tonight either. And nobody blueballs Mr. Dick! COLE And on that genuinely scary note, the Halloween Spectacular will continue.

I absolutely hate his Knockout Gimmick that some ROH fans are jizzing over. Well that's ROH/Gabe's fault. Hero's heel shtick was entertaining and getting over, but you can't get over in ROH if you don't hit people REALLY FUCKING HARD~! Joe's gimmick was hitting people a bunch. Morishima's gimmick was hitting people a bunch. KENTA's gimmick was kicking people a bunch. Danielson's gimmick was MMA elbowing people a bunch. Nigel's gimmick was Lariating people a bunch. Hero was getting over by having a personality. Can't have that! One fluke knockout and now his gimmick is elbowing people a bunch! To be fair, that match is notoriously devisive. Plenty agree with what you're saying, but I think the point was they were supposed to be doing that. The match was set-up as trainer versus trainer. I'm not a big fan of the match, but it's better when you take it in context of the feud and Hero's heel turn on Quack that resulted from it. Of course that happened in a different promotion, but still. Plus a lot of IWA fans are kind dumb. Some of them probably think Ian Rotten versus Mickie Knuckles is equivalent to Savage/Steamboat.

If Bourne is forced to take time offer, they should use Kane attacking him backstage to write him out. And actually show it on screen this time. None of this "Kane beat up Mysterio in a parking lot and took his soul" every 5 minutes while he's taking a dozen headscissors like a pussy from the guy.

Fans. Universe. Zombies. Co-incidence?

I came *this* close to putting Bourne in my team. All I have to do now is wait for Boogeyman to hurry up and return and I'll be laughing.

Ah, see that better explains it. The problem is I've been seeing a lot of the fear mentioned ever since Pearce was named, from people who don't generally like Pearce as a wrestler.

To be fair, I felt the same way about both Piper and Jake's DVDs too and I'm more of a fan of them. Looking it over again the match listing doesn't look bad. Just not 'spectacular', I guess. I'd agree with that. Even the Flair matches though, obviously the matches are classics, but even from them I never came away from them thinking "Boy, Harley Race was one of the best ever" as I was expecting. I'll admit to my knowledge or viewing of pro wrestling pre-1980 being pretty slim, so maybe I just need to see more of him. But from what I've seen (admittedly more WWF than NWA probably), I just never 'got it' yet.

The Most Entertaining Entertainer In Sports Entertainment! That's no worse than Jack Swagger's nickname.

Credit ROH Newswire: I can safely say that Stupified in particular is about as far away from 1970s pro wrestling as they could have gotten. Don't judge the book(er) by it's cover?

Well, no. I'm not saying Dusty isn't an all-time great or anything like that. But, I own Hogan's DVD but wouldn't consider buying Dusty's, because I couldn't see myself watching a DVD with nothing but his matches. Even if his promos were fantastic and he drew money etc. etc. It's personal opinion. Just like this guy's personal opinion that he never considered Dusty great. Okay, I'll bite, so now you can all tear me a new one instead. Harley Race.

The other thing with DiBiase was, how many of his matches went to screwy finishes or non-finishes? More often than not he went to count-outs or DQs or cheap roll-ups during his WWF run, especially in the big matches, that probably has something to do with his lack of real classic matches. I think DiBiase was a really smart worker more than a 'great' worker. He wasn't spectacular but he played his role expertly.

I think the poor opposition has a lot to do with it. Nash, as has been stated, worked well with the right opposition and... uhm, not so well without it. If you've got a champion like that, rule number one is you have to protect him, surely? Position him against guys who are going to play to his strengths. In no way do Sid or Mabel fit into this category. It didn't help that there weren't many workers, good, bad or indifferent, considered main-event talent of course. But they should have realised that and sacrificed star power for talent. Looking at the roster, there were a few options. Obviously Bret and Michaels they went with. Whether Backlund would have made a good opponent in a lengthy match is debatable, but might have been worth a go. You had Undertaker who would at least have been an interesting match-up. You had Razor, again face against face but some intrigue behind it. You had Owen, who could have been positioned over a month or so. Ditto Jarrett. You had Bam Bam on the roster, although his face-turn at Wrestlemania complicated things slightly, he could have been a decent opponent. All better options than Sid or Mabel. The timing of the victory was terrible too. Not just because Backlund had only just won the title, but because Diesel had only just turned on Shawn. They built Shawn/Diesel up as a team for a good year or so, had the dissension angle going for a good few months before Survivor Series. Diesel winning the title, if anything, got in the way. Sure the feud continued, but the title win totally undermined the turn by coming so close after. Even coming a few weeks later would have been better than when it did happen.

If they had to, would it really be that hard to edit the audio on any past DVDs they print from now on, covering up Time Is Now with something else? They do it with other themes often enough. Well, see, they did this movie and... oh, nevermind.

Proof as if proof were needed that Cena sold out. That fan is clearly the only one keeping it real. I'll say this for Cena. I'm not his biggest fan in terms of his wrestling ability, past the point where it doesn't really matter and to the point where fans are noticing it. And I'm not the biggest fan of the way WWE has his character act most of the time. But, after seeing these video packages they've put together to hype his return, it's hard to deny he's the #1 guy in the business for a reason. And he certainly comes across (positive spin or not) as a good person in general and for the wrestling business. I'm just glad that WWE have been brave enough, eventually, to stop shying away from the negative reactions he gets and embracing it as part of his character. Best move they could have made.

Ronnie Garvin. WWF-era that is. I always used to think he looked incredibly goofy, whether on offence or selling, and that the Garvin Stomp was the dumbest thing I'd seen. I've since gone the other way. To be fair, he does still look kinda goofy, but he doesn't suck. Also Andre, mainly because I first saw him towards the end of his career, late 80s, when he was becoming less and less mobile.

See, I've seen Samoa Joe announced as coming back for a one-shot and Necro Butcher versus Brodie Lee booked since Gabe's gone, so I wouldn't buy into that straight away. Seems like the majority of people are simply assuming that's what'll happen, since that's how Pearce works in the ring. They see Pearce wrestle and assume ROH's going to be like old school Memphis or something. Good. ROH shows tend to be pretty draining to watch, the vast majority of guys work too similarly (I wouldn't say ROH is all headdrops and hard kicks, but there's an awful lot of it) and I couldn't tell you allignments for a lot of the roster. My only worry so far, besides ROH fans turning on everything before a show's even happened just because Gabe's gone, is what Pearce does with himself. If he puts himself high up the card, as some many bookers seem to do, people are going to turn on him and ROH at the first opportunity.

Exaggerate much? So, how about that CM Punk match that everybody texted that they wanted to see O WAIT~!! You mean Survivor Series, surely? Yeah, except that's not how wrestling works. To say it would have been completely the same if it ended in eight seconds or something is completely missing the point of wrestling.

Man, I got absolutely hosed on the PPV front. - Shelton in the preview slot - Santino retaining but still losing via DQ - Finlay losing the vote - Kane in a No DQ match using no weapons and not hitting a single chokeslam Not that it makes much difference, but JBL's clothesline was clearly called the Clothesline From Hell on commentary so he should have gotten finisher points.

Honestly, a shake-up was needed. I've only bought one DVD this entire year and that was Rising Above, simply to watch Aries/Nigel. Storylines have been thin on the ground and somebody said a lot for the booking in general being confusing or plain bad. Ever since the Gen Next stable warfare feud went wrong, it's been downhill. I can't think of one single thing that turned me off. Claudio should be the top guy in the company right now and they screwed that up monumentally, but really there's just been nothing all year that's gotten my interest. So, I'm only seeing the positive of this so far. Well, ignoring that Cheech and Cloudy were in ROH for months, I'd like to think that this is a good sign and wasn't sighted as a negative against Gabe. ROH needs some new talent desperately. Cheech and Cloudy are one of the best teams on the indies at the moment. Brodie's been improving dramatically for the past year. And I don't know how the Portal will go down with diehard ROH fans (a dancing pharoah and a snake) but they're really talented, especially considering they've been around for only 1-2 years.

[COLOR=red]-THERE NOW FOLLOWS AN OAOAST ADVERTISEMENT-[/COLOR] Do you like wrestling? KID FAN I sure do! Do you have the internet? KID FAN Who doesn't!? Then the OAOAST just got even better!! Go to OAOAST.com to register now for OAOAST Fantasy, the official Fantasy game of the OAOAST! (It's like that NFL thing.) It's completely free and the prizes reflect this fact! [b]CHOOSE[/b] your roster of OAOAST Superstars! [b]ADHERE[/b] to your $50m budget! [b]GAMBLE[/b] on your superstars appearing on TV once every two months! [i]IT'S THAT SIMPLE![/i] Take watching the OAOAST to a whole other level! KID FAN Holy crap, that's Doctor Steven Pigley, that means he gets appearance points! This is the best HeldDOWN~! EVER! You'll never look at Syndicated the same way again! KID FAN Biff Atlas in the main event!? I'm spending EVERY Saturday or Sunday watching the OAOAST now! Just follow the links and fill in the forms to change your outlook on the OAOAST, forever! OAOAST Fantasy- It's Fantastical! Out of the commercial, we find ourselves with the returning Maggie Nerdly! And she has a microphone, which means she must be about to interview somebody. Probably Bohemoth, since he's standing right next to her. MAGGIE Hey, Maggie Nerdly here, picking up those hot Appearance Points for ya'll out there in cyberspace, but also here to talk to my guest right now, Bohemoth. BOHEMOTH Hey, good to have you back. How you doing? MAGGIE Thanks to a mutual associate of ours who'll remain unnamed, I've been better. Realising he's hit a sore spot, Bo wisely leaves it at that. MAGGIE Now, The Halloween Spectacular is in eight nights and you're in the main-event, a five man elimination match for the World Heavyweight Championship. Do you think you'll have what it takes to survive four other opponents and come out with the World Title? BOHEMOTH You know Maggie, I've worked long and hard to get into a position to be challenging for the World Heavyweight Championship. I've stepped out of another man's shadow and had to work my way from the bottom up to get my name mentioned in the same breath as the likes of Alfdogg and Tha Puerto Rican. I'm not kidding myself, it's gonna be more hard work at The Halloween Spectacular, no doubt about it. I'm stepping into that ring with four other guys who all want the same thing I do. But, do I think I've got what it takes? You better believe it. See I've accomplished a lot along the way to this. I've beaten big names. Faced big challenges. And I know I'm ready. Bo removes the sunglasses from over his head and places him in his pocket. BOHEMOTH The fact is I proved I belong at the very top when I beat the very best the OAOAST has ever offered Zack Malibu, not once but twice, one of them at the biggest stage of them all AngleMania. I proved to myself and to everybody, I'm World Title material. You ask Zack if I've got what it takes. Bo smiles to himself. BOHEMOTH Don't just take his word for it though. You ask anyone who's been in the ring with me before. If they're honest, they'll tell you that I'm the guy to watch at The Halloween Spectacular. As far as the odds go? Chances are I'll be a pretty marked man. And I wouldn't have it any other way. Bohemoth replaces the sunglasses back on his head, flicking them down before he walks off.

We cut backstage, to find OAOAST President Josie Baker talking with the SENIOR senior official of professional wrestling, Clem Buzzlefoxer. Josie seems to be trying to coach the poor guy how to make his count faster, which doesn't go well as he over-exerts his elbow in the process. Walking up behind this interesting conversation is Landon Maddix, who claps his hands getting Josie's attention (but not Clem's, hearing isn't what it used to be), to Megan Skye's embarrassment. MADDIX My my, if it isn't Senator Palin and Senator McCain! How's the campaign going? CLEM Who... who are you? MADDIX Yes yes, I admire what you did for this country greatly. You have my vote sir. Landon shakes Clem's hand, confusing the poor old geezer into thinking he really must be running for office, which explains the smile on his face as he totters off. JOSIE Did you want something? MADDIX Josie, can I ask you a question? Why in the hell are we dedicating 30 minutes of every show talking about a children's school-election that only effects about 12 people on this planet? We've got 80 wrestlers claiming unemployment while some Arabian blowhard is droning on about some eight year old girl? What the hell kinda wrestling promotion is this!? JOSIE Wel... MADDIX Sorry, that wasn't actually my question, I just felt like venting. No, I came to talk to you about The Halloween Spectacular. I've talked it over with everybody and I want James Blonde and Faqu representing me in the Tag Title match. JOSIE You mean 'representing Cucaracha Internacional'? MADDIX Well... yeah, yeah, same thing. JOSIE Right. Consider it done. That wasn't a question though. MADDIX Oh, it doesn't matter. Landon promptly walks off from a now equally confused Josie Baker, past the HeldDOWN~! interview backdrop which wakes Josh Matthews up from his game of Top Trumps with a member of the OAOAST production team. JOSH LANDON! Landon, sorry to interrupt but, can I get an interview? About The Halloween Spectacular? MADDIX What do you wanna hear? JOSH Huh? MADDIX Well, do you want me to talk about how I'm a three-time World Champion across two seperate companies? How I've beaten the best that the OAOAST has to offer? How I'm leading the group that over the next few days is finally going to prove it's the most dominant in the OAOAST, when we hold the World Titles in singles, tag team and six-man tag competition? And how after waiting so long, it's finally my time to regain the OAOAST World Title I had robbed from me one year ago? Because it'd be true. Landon shrugs. MADDIX Or, do you want the character assassination treatment? Do you want me to talk about how John Brickston has all the charisma of a jar of mayonnaise and that the most interesting thing he's come up with in his entire career to change that perception is stop using his first name? Or how Bohemoth is so busy fending off little girls harbouring teen crushes on him, those well-oiled muscles of his are probably going to be too tired to drag those ridiculous sunglasses off of his head, let alone win a World Championship? How about Alfdogg, the old guard of the OAOAST with a wise old head on a pair of old shoulders carried around on his old knees, being quite literally old news? Or of course, I could lay into Tha Puerto Rican... but, then again, he's really a walking joke as it is, so what untrodden territory is there, really? Landon shrugs again. MADDIX You tell me what angle you want and I'll give it to you. I'll tell you whatever you wanna hear. The fact is, all that's going to matter is what happens at The Halloween Spectacular. Five Man Prism Match? Everybody knows it should be me and the World Champion, I should be the sole number one contender, simple as that. Everybody saw it, clear as day, I was on top in the fatal four way. Well, I'll just have to be on top again, won't I? And, I will be... whether you want to hear that, or not. Landon and Megan again make a quick exit.

COLE And it's now time for our main-event... COACH Already? Man. Remind me to TiVo Syndicated this week. COLE ...here on HeldDOWN~!, featuring no less than 15 of the OAOAST's finest in a battle to take one step closer to OAOAST World Championship gold. Members of The In Crowd, The Enterprise, The Deadly Alliance and Cucaracha Internacional did battle on a wild and crazy HeldDOWN~! last week in San Juan as the war of the words over who the most dominant group in the OAOAST really is finally and inevitably spilled over into violence! [QUOTE=LAST WEEK ON HELDDOWN~!, Love Shack] ALFDOGG I hope you're not grouping this four with your group Maddix. Because we're fixing to run through [i]everybody[/i] in this ring in about five seconds if you all don't get the hell out. MONEYMAKER I assume that includes the females as well as the males? Reject grabs the microphone from Alf, realising that shot was directed at him. REJECT Look, Moneymaker, put it this way... *SLAP!* COLE OH BOY! The Messiah reels back from the slap, nobody quite able to believe it just happened. REJECT I will run through who I want, whe... Reject has no time to finish that thought though, as The Enterprise suddenly pile forward AND START SLUGGING IT OUT WITH THE MEMBERS OF THE DEADLY ALLIANCE!! The punches fly back and forth sending Melissa, Mackenzie and Molly all heading for the safety of the outside. And Megan soon joins them, as after watching for a few seconds, Landon gives the signal AND CUCARACHA INTERNACIONAL SUDDENLY DIVE INTO THE FRAY AS WELL!!!! COLE HERE WE GO!!!! COACH No, no, this is what he wants! Damn it! It's chaos as the fifteen or so OAOAST superstars do battle inside the ring. On the outside, even the females are about to get in on the act, as Mackenzie and Molly get into a heated arguement with Megan and with Melissa. Watching all this unfold, Leon puts his microphone down carefully and dusts his hands on a job well done. Getting to the top of the aisle he decides not to leave after all though, instead reaching into the ring AND PULLING OUT REJECT, GOING WILD WITH RIGHT HANDS ON THE FLOOR!!! COLE LEON HAS REJECT!! OH MAN WHAT A CHAOTIC SCENE!! COACH AND NOW WHAT!? Now would be ZACK MALIBU, dodging past Reject and Rodez to dive into the ring in pursuit of Theodore Moneymaker! The Messiah is tied up with Thunderkid though and Zack gets lost in the melee, instead throwing right hands at whatever Enterprise or Cucaracha Internacional member steps his way. Moments later and BOHEMOTH sprints out through the curtains to get in on the war as well, sliding in and going to work on Alfdogg!! COLE IT'S ALL GONE TO HECK IN SAN JUAN!! Not a moment too soon referees rush out from the back to try and break the mass brawl up. But the wrestlers outnumber the officials and they're powerless to help, as the wild punches continue to fly around in the ring. They do manage to break up Leon and Reject though, for what it's worth. With Leon restrained, Melissa starts to rush towards him... but Molly Nerdly grabs her sister by the arm and wheels her around, into a big SLAP! Down goes Melissa, but Megan attacks Molly from behind, leading to Mackenzie tackling her to the ground giving the officials even more order to try and restore. Eventually, they give up and signal to the back, leading to more OAOAST staff and road agents to run to the ring to help out! COACH Michael, hold my headset. COLE What? Are you mad, you can't go up there! COACH What!? Screw that, room service just brought me my meal and I don't wanna be chewing on air, fool. COLE Oh for the love of... The fight begins to become a little less frenetic, if only because the shots everyone is taking are having their effect. Some roll to the floor to get out of the firing line, like The Beverly Hills Blonds and James Blonde, who go back at it on the floor instead. In the ring, Todd Cortez finds the room to set Sandman9000 up for the Riot Act Plus... but Christian Wright bundles him over. Finally the mass of OAOAST officials is joined by some of the locker room, the likes of The Love Doctors, Vinny Valentine and The Can-Jam Connection being drafted in to get the warring factions seperated! COLE It is utter chaos on HeldDOWN~! and it seems like there's no end in sight, even with all these bodies out here to stop it... LOOK OUT!!!!! Suddenly, Zack Malibu leaves the ring, with a PLANCHA OUT ONTO JAMES BLONDE AND THE BEVERLY HILLS BLONDS!!!!! COLE THIS IS OUT OF CONTROL!! We're going to need the US army to break this up at this rate![/QUOTE] COLE After that chaotic scene, Josie Baker acted and made this astronomical battle royal, with the added incentive that the last two men standing tonight will go on to our Halloween Spectacular next week in Miami, competing one on one to determine who faces the World Heavyweight Champion at November Reign! A match graphic pops up, with two black sillohuette figures, hyping the #1 Contendership Match between '???' and '???'. An in no way totally unneccessary visual aid! COLE Now, the way this match is laid out isn't your typical battle royal. One man from each group will start the match, with eliminations to occur when someone is thrown over the top rope and both feet touch the floor. But at each interval, another member of each stable will enter. Which is a big disadvantage for The In Crowd considering they only have Leon and Zack in this thing. But a huge advantage for The Enterprise with six entrants, which means whoever are in Blocks 4 and 5 will be coming in alone and fresh. A huge advantage for The Enterprise, there's a surprise. COACH What are you implying? COLE I'm not implying anything. Why, guilty conscience? COACH Not a bit of it. You can't put this down to Enterprise bias. They're at a 9-6 disadvantage! No bias! And Josie threw everyone into this thing, even Leon Rodez, the one responsible for the entire brawl, so you can't say she's bias. COLE I wouldn't dream of it. Let's go up to Michael Buffer. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is your special Stables Battle Royal! The rules are as follows. One man from each of the four represented groups will begin the match. Then, at evenly timed three minute intervals there-after, each group will enter one more member. This process will continue until all groups are fully represented and until all 15 men have entered. Eliminations occur when a competitor is thrown over the top and onto the floor. The match continues until two men remain, with those two to go on to the Halloween Spectacular to compete for the number one contendership for the Heavyweight Championship of the world! Are you ready!? "YYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" BUFFER Washington D.C... ARE... YOU... RRRRRREEEEEEEEAADDYYYYY!?!? "YYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" BUFFER Then... for the thousands in attendance here in our nation's capital... and for those watching around the world, ladies and gentlemen... llllllLLLLLLLET'S GET RRRRREAADDYYYYY TO RRRRRUUUMMMBBBLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! "If you are what you say you are A superstar Then have no fear The camera's here And the microphones and they wanna know Oh oh oh yeah" The red carpet is rolled out as "Superstar" by Lupe Fiasco plays. And first to appear, not looking in the best of moods, is Ned Blanchard. The sullen Handsome Hustler throws his arms up over his head in a defiant signal to the boos of the crowd but certainly not the usual contempt he'd show for them were in his usual fine form. BUFFER Introducing first, Enterprise representative number one! Hailing from Beverly Hills, California... he weighs two hundred, thirty five pounds. One half of the walk of fame worthy Beverly Hills Blonds... "THE HANDSOME HUSTLER"... NNEEEEEEEEEDD... BBLLLLLAAAAAAANNCCCCCHHHHHAAAAAARRRRRRRDD!!!" "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Ned enters the ring and instantly hits a corner, leaning in the turnbuckles with narrow eyes aimed at the crowd. COLE Boy, Ned continuing to draw the short straws. Entering first of six for the Enterprise tonight, this after what we heard earlier that The Heavenly Rockers will be representing The Enterprise in the Fatal 4-Way for the Tag Team Titles next week in Miami. In, what was, a surprise decision. COACH How was it a surprise? The Heavenly Rockers are one of the most successful teams in the OAOAST... COLE And so are The Beverly Hills Blonds, who unlike Logan and Synth are official, card-holding Enterprise members. "Oh No" by Mos Def, Nate Dogg and Pharoah Monche hits next, getting a bit more of a cheer from the crowd. Head down, Todd Cortez marches out and right towards the ring in a state of complete focus. His pyro goes off far behind him, already way past his cue. BUFFER Introducing next, representative number one for Cuucaracha Internacional! Hailing from Hollywood Boulevard... weighing in at two hundred, twenty six pounds. He is "THE URBAN LEGEND"... TTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODD... CCOOOOOOOOORRRRRRTTEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZ!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE The black sheep of Cucaracha Internacional, Todd Cortez, who'll hold no stable pride but will be relishing the competition in this match nonetheless. COACH I'll bet. This is his only shot at number one contendership for anything while he's still refusing to fall in line. As Cortez slides into the ring, the arena goes dark. "God Of Thunder" pounds out through the arena. The entrance way lights up yellow, then fills up with yellow smoke, followed by the figure of Thunderkid walking through the smoke. With his half of the Tag Team Titles around his waist, Thunderkid walks tall and determined to the ring. BUFFER Representative number one for The Deadly Alliance. Hailing from Green Bay, Wisconsin... he weighs in at two hundred and fifty pounds. One half of the OAOAST World Tag Team Champions... TTHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUUNN - DDEEEEEEERRRRRKKIIIIIIIIIIIIDD!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Thunderkid enters the ring and raises his arms, then starts bouncing back and forth on the spot sizing his immediate opponents up. COLE Gang warfare here tonight and plenty more to come at the Halloween Spectacular, as Thunderkid and Reject will defend their Tag Team Titles against opponents from Cucaracha Internacional, The Enterprise and The In Crowd. COACH After months of talk, it's starting to heat up between these groups Michael. And the OAOAST may never be the same once the dust settles on it all. The three men in the ring all cast some threatening looks around, "Rock The Casbah" hits to bring the crowd to their feet. Sweeping through the entrance way is of course Leon Rodez, wearing a big grin on his face as he opens up his robe to reveal the Nerdly thrilling treats beneath. BUFFER And finally, representative number one of The In Crowd! From Grand Rapids, Michigan... weighing in at two hundred, eighteen pounds. "THE NEW-AGE LOVE MACHINE"... "THE GRAND RAPIDS GOLDEN CHILD"... ladies and gentlemen, "SILKY SMOOTH"... LLLLLLEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOONN... RRRRRRRROOOOOOODDEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZ!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Leaping to the ring apron, Leon turns to the crowd and blows them a two-handed kiss before leaping in over the top. Thunderkid takes a step towards him, Leon throwing up a mocking boxing pose and daring him to 'fite me'. COACH See, this is all this punk's fault. Everybody was getting along fine throwing around groundless threats and then he had to light the touchpaper, didn't he? I see him for real now. Leon ain't no good guy. He's just a troublemaker, plain and simple! Rodez removes of his robe and suddenly we're ready to go, as the lone referee in the ring joins his two colleagues on the floor. Finding himself in the middle of the ring, Leon quickly dances to the one unmanned corner before anyone can jump him unexpectedly, before the bell sounds. COLE So all of these four are in the toughest position possible to make it to the Halloween Spectacular. Of course, the best position will be whoever enters sixth of The Enterprise. Gee, I wonder who that'll be. *DINGDINGDING!* On the bell, the four starters all carefully start to leave their corners. All prepared for a sudden attack from each other. As they near the middle of the ring, Leon and Cortez get within touching distance and look like they're about to lock hands... and the moment they take their focus away, Thunderkid and Blanchard pounce on them! TK clubs away at Leon, Ned doing the same on Cortez. COLE Thunderkid and Ned both spotting an opening there and the battle picks up where we left it last week, hot and heavy! After a European uppercut, TK looks for an irish whip. Next to him Ned has the same idea with Cortez. Both Leon and Cortez duck attacks coming back off the ropes though, rebounding back and baseball sliding through the legs in stereo. As they get to their feet Leon and Cortez look at each other, surprised to be in synchronicity, before both ducking clotheslines and both hitting dropkicks on their respective opponents! COLE How about that! Leon and Cortez again look each other in the eye and pretty soon they're face to face, about to go at it. Again the other two men in the match see an opportunity though and come charging. Alert, Leon sidesteps TK, who ends up clotheslining Cortez, who in turn bumps backwards into Ned. As they hit the mat, Leon tries to take advantage on TK, looking for an irish whip, which is reversed. Rodez hits the turnbuckles and Thunderkid charges, only to eat boot! Hitting the ropes, Leon looks to follow up... ...but gets caught and PRESSED, Thunderkid walking him over to the ropes... ...only for Leon to slip free before elimination! Landing on his feet, The Silky Smooth One turns TK around and goes to work with forearms, while Cortez stomps Ned in a corner across the ring. COLE I wonder what Tha Puerto Rican must be thinking watching this, with 15 guys in immediate title contention, plus the 4 he has to wrestle next week in Miami! COACH That's the beauty of a bloated roster baby. Irish whip attempt is reversed again by Thunderkid, but this time Leon grabs the ropes to stop himself and encourages TK to kiss his rear end. TK charges in, presumably not through eagerness to do just that, landing up with him drop toeholded (toeheld?) across the middle rope. COLE Uh-oh, get out them tap shoes! COACH That's horrible. A happy again Leon does the JIG~! before hitting the ropes and driving his body weight into the spine of the Tag Team Champion! COLE Call That Bitch Bojangles! Fist pumping, Leon fires up the crowd. What he doesn't notice is Todd Cortez coming off the ropes to his side and LAUNCHING him into the air with the HOLLOW POOOOOOIIIIIIINT~! (Period.) Cortez jumps to his feet, but Ned is waiting with a clothesli... NO! Cortez sidesteps and guides Ned up and over the top... ...onto the apron, as Ned hooks the top rope and saves himself at the last second! COLE Oh, Ned almost gone! COACH That would have done him no favours with Mister Moneymaker, that's for sure. Maybe if Ned and Simon want to know why The Heavenly Rockers are repping the E at the Halloween Spectacular, they oughta look in the mirror. I still love'em though, don't get it twisted. As he rolls back inside Ned is stomped by Cortez, before being pulled up and hit with a European uppercut. And a second. Cortez then wrings the arm and looks for an irish whip. Spinning out in front, Ned reels Cortez in though and pulls a 180 to drop him throat-first across the top rope with the STUN GUN! Cortez whiplashes off the rope and holds his throat, as for a moment Ned is the only man standing. That moment soon passes though, as he turns around into a BICYCLE KICK from Thunderkid! COLE Bodies are flying in the early going. Physicality at every turn. Thunderkid steps over Ned's body, going back after Leon. He stomps him by the ropes, then stands on the bottom ring rope pressing it down across Leon's windpipe. TK delivers another few stomps, then pulls Leon up and tries to dump him over the top. COLE Here we go, Thunderkid looking to thin out the field a little. COACH And no surprise he goes for Leon. Good for him. Hanging on, Leon is able to avoid going to the floor as Thunderkid eventually pushes him over the top. He quickly scoots in under the apron and away from TK, giving him time to get to one knee and fire a right hand. And another. TK clubs back at Rodez, but a headbutt to the gut doubles him up, allowing Leon to get to his feet. He drives a bionic elbow to the back of the head, before backing off the ropes behind him. TK boots him in the gut though, elevating Leon into a fireman's carry and dumping him face-first to the canvas. Off the ropes, Thunderkid then follows up with a HARD boot to the side of the head! COLE Ooh! COACH That oughta make pretty boy a little less pretty, huh? COLE Maybe a little. COACH Ghey. With Leon down, Thunderkid goes after Cortez seeing him on the ropes. TK tries to lift Cortez over the top and calls Ned over to help him out. Still smarting from the Bicycle Kick, Ned gives TK no assistance though and instead gouges his eyes. Ned then tries to eliminate Thunderkid, only for Cortez to break it up. COLE We're getting ready for the next four entrants in under a minute. The face of this battle royal will change pretty dramatically at that point. Cortez and Ned trade shots, before Cortez makes some room... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and delivers a knifedge chop. Ned fires back with a right hand... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and Cortez fires off a second chop. So Ned delivers a knee to the gut to cut him off. Pulling Cortez in, Ned then slaps on a sleeper, as we see in the aisleway the bandaged face of Sandman9000 appears. COLE Here we go and here comes the Heartland Champion! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, Block 1 of this match is now underway. Entering the ring at this time, representative number two for The Deadly Alliance... the OAOAST Heartland Champion... SSAAAAANNDDMMMMMAAAAAANN 9000!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" As Sandman slides into the ring, Cortez tries to fight out of the sleeper. Turning to the side, he delivers an elbow to the ribs of Blanchard. And a second. With the hold weakened, Cortez then places a hand on Ned's back and shoots him off... ...into Thunderkid, WHO BACKDROPS NED UP AND OVER THE TOP ROPE!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COACH Oh Ned, no! COLE There goes the Handsome Hustler, at the worst possible time! As Sandman and Thunderkid jump Cortez, Ned sits up to see an apologetic Simon Singleton running past him. BUFFER Representative number two of The Enterprise... "BOX OFFICE" SSSIIIIMMMMMMOOOOOOOONN... SSSIIIIINNGGLLLLLEEEEEEETTOOOOOOONN!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ NED BLANCHARD ENTERED: #1, Enterprise LEFT: 1st ELIMINATED: None ELIMINATED BY: Thunderkid Left in ring: Todd Cortez, Thunderkid, Leon Rodez, Sandman9000, Simon Singleton ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Singleton attacks Thunderkid from behind with a double axehandle, then follows him into a corner. Cortez and Sandman continue to go at it as well, while the entrants keep on coming. BUFFER Representative number two for Cucaracha Internacional, one-third of the OAOAST Six-Man Tag Team Champions... NNAAATTHHHAAAAAAANNIIIIIEEEEEEELLLLLLL... BBLLLLLLAAAAAAAAACCKK!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Black leaves everyone else to their battles and targets Leon Rodez as he slides in, attacking him in a corner. "ZACK!" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" COLE These people know who's coming next! COACH They're doing a better job than me then, this is confusing as hell! Those who are following this mess get their wish, as eventually out through the entrance bursts The Franchise, running to the ring at top speed. BUFFER And now entering the ring, the second and final representative of The In Crowd... the former three-time World Heavyweight Champion and undisputed Franchise of the OAOAST... ZZZAAAAAAAACCK... MMMMMAAAAAALLLIIIIIIIIBBUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE BUSINESS HAS PICKED UP BAH GAWD!! Zack slides into the ring and he comes in swinging! Spinning Singleton around, he drops him with a right hand. Thunderkid takes a step forward, to get dropped with a right as well. Wheeling away, Zack is charged by Sandman, but he blocks him with a boot then goes on the attack. Palm strike from the left side, palm strike from the right, another from the left and Sandman is reeling. Off the ropes, Malibu delivers a clothesline that puts Sandman against the ropes but doesn't knock him down. And as the Heartland Champion comes back asking for more, Zack looks to deliver. As Zack hits the ropes, Sandman ducks his head looking for a backdrop. Zack sees it and hops behind into a waistlock. Standing switch by Sandman, but Zack switches back and dumps Sandman backwards with a German Suplex! COLE The Franchise is on fire! COACH Not for much longer. Coach's prediction looks accurate, as Cortez hits the ropes for the HOLLOW POOOOIIII... NO! Zack leapfrogs The Urban Legend, who ends up spilling to the floor. He quickly tries to get back inside, but Zack dropkicks his legs out, causing him to fall face-first into the ring apron! Cortez is then put in the firing line again, as Simon Singleton charges... ...AND ZACK BACKDROPS HIM OVER THE TOP ONTO THE URBAN LEGEND!!!! COACH Aw, damnit! COLE And whatever advantage The Enterprise had is disappearing before their eyes! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ SIMON SINGLETON ENTERED: #2, Enterprise LEFT: 2nd ELIMINATED: None ELIMINATED BY: Zack Malibu Left in ring: Todd Cortez, Thunderkid, Leon Rodez, Sandman9000, Nathaniel Black, Zack Malibu ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Zack turns away after the elimination... ...and comes face to face with Nathaniel Black, sending a wave of anticipation around the Wachovia Center! COACH Uh-oh! Uh-oh! COLE Would you look at this? Zack and Black, these two men have tore the house down every time they've met and they've been just dying for another shot at one another for months. And here it is! Already mouthing off to Zack, Black gives him a shove in the chest and dares him to take the first shot. No second invitation needed. Zack nails Black with a palm strike to the jaw. The Englishman responds with a BIG slap though, the sound echoing throughout the arena as Malibu reels backwards. As he does, he quickly has to drop down to avoid a Deadly Alliance double clothesline, which ends up nailing Black instead. Sandman and Thunderkid regroup as Zack charges them, letting him go through the middle of them. As he rebounds back they deliver a double boot and back off the ropes for another double clothesline, but Zack ducks. Sandman and TK keep going though... ...but as they rebound, Zack suddenly launches Leon Rodez overhead towards them, The Silky Smooth One coming out of the air with a dropkick that knocks both men backwards out of the ring!! COLE Excellent teamwork from The Usual Suspects, the former World Tag Team Champions! A high-five between Leon and Zack is a brief moment of calm, before Todd Cortez rolls back in and the Cucaracha Internacional twosome attack. Black jumps Leon while Cortez goes after Zack, beating them down before whipping them into opposite corners. With Black calling the shots, Todd whips his 'partner' across the ring towards Zack... and into a boot! Black staggers backwards, but Todd grabs him again anyway and whips him towards Leon... who also puts up a boot! COLE Not so excellent teamwork from Cortez and Black though. Understandably, Black isn't happy and yells at Cortez, even going so far as to shove him in the chest. Todd doesn't back down though and shoves his stable'mate' right back. COLE Uh-oh, Cucaracha Internacional in danger of falling apart! Nathaniel scowls at the push and gets in Cortez's face... BEFORE SURPRISING HIM WITH A HEADBUTT TO THE FACE!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Ooh! And somewhere, Landon Maddix must be fuming now! COACH I doubt it. Cortez is only in this to make up the numbers, you know that. As Cortez goes down, The Usual Suspects see their chance and sandwich Black between two meaty clotheslines. Black staggers, but doesn't go down. So Zack nails him with a shot to the face, sending him around into a jab from Leon! Open hand from Zack! A jab from Leon! Open hand! A jab! Open hand! A jab! Rodez turns, blowing the kiss, before turning back on his heels... *SMACK!* *SMACK!* ...AND BLACK'S HEAD ALMOST EXPLODES FROM AN ENZIGURI/SCHOOL'S OUT COMBO!!!! "YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Black collapses like a felled redwood, completely KOed! COLE MAMA SAID... SCHOOL'S OUT!? COACH Dayyum. Just... dayyum. You look dayyum up in the dictionary and you'll see a picture of that. COLE I doubt it somehow, but whatever. Back in slide Thunderkid and Sandman, or attempt to at least. Zack and Leon meet them, keeping TK outside before bringing Sandman in. They send him into a corner with a double whip, before Zack follows in with a forearm smash. Zack then rolls backwards, with Leon soaring over top of him and driving the Superman Spear into the ribs! Sandman falls against the bottom turnbuckle... and Zack nails him with a facewash style knee strike off the ropes! COLE Boy, The Usual Suspects, the sole representatives for the In Crowd tonight, are doing exactly what they had to do. They are working as a well oiled machine. Quick, vibrant tag team combinations. Thunderkid makes it back in and is grabbed as soon as he does so. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" Chop by Zack. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" Chop by Leon. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" Chop by Zack. And Leon decides to concede defeat, elbowing TK instead. After shrugs of the shoulders they load TK up, sending him off the ropes. Rodez lands a Rolling Sole BUTT, then scoops Zack up off the ropes, swinging him around with an assisted 619. As TK goes down, Rodez keeps a hold of Zack and throws him off his shoulder, bringing The Franchise down on top of Thunderkid with an assisted moonsault! COLE And again, another great combination of moves. COACH I can't argue against that. With The Usual Suspects standing, suddenly all eyes begin to turn to the entrance way, as the next wave of entrants begins... and begins with a very cautious REJECT, who slows almost to a stop as he sees Leon and Zack spot him. BUFFER Block 3 of this match will now begin. Entering the ring, representative number three for The Deadly Alliance... one half of the OAOAST World Tag Team Champions... RRRRRRRREEEEEJJJJEEEEEEEECCTT!!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE And Reject, in no rush to join the party. The Usual Suspects are rolling, but more than that, one of those Usual Suspects is Leon Rodez! Reject wipes a hand across his face and goes to enter the ring, but Leon takes a step forward and Reject suddenly thinks better of it. To the derision of the fans, The R-Man decides to wait it out, as he sees more help coming. BUFFER Representative number three for Cucaracha Internacional hails from The Isle Of Samoa and is one third of the OAOAST 6-Man Tag Team Champions... FFFFAAAAAAAAAAAA - QQQUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH Alright, here we go! COLE A heavy hitter for sure, Faqu. The Samoan Wrecking Ball marches to the ring and Reject applauds him, encouraging him to "go get them". Faqu stops and glares at Reject for a moment, saying something to him in Samoan before he walks past him (to Reject's relief) and stomps up the ring steps. Just as enters the ring, out rushes DETECTIVE BOSLEY as well, diving in and going right on the attack, right as Faqu does the same! BUFFER And representative number three from The Enterprise. From Miami, Florida... "DETECTIVE" TTAAAAAAAANNGGOOOOOOOOOOO... BBOOOOOOOSSSLLLLLLEEEEEYYYYYYY!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Bosley and Faqu brawl with Leon and Zack, giving Reject a window to safely slide into the ring. Sure enough, he goes right after Leon, knocking him down from behind while trading shots with Faqu. Reject stomps away on Rodez, not noticing that the Samoan hasn't appreciated his help and is glaring at him. Only when Reject stomps stomping and starts to pose does he realise. And by then it's too late, as Faqu nails him with a thrust to the throat! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" COLE Well that might shut Reject up for a little while. Hopefully. With Bosley and Zack still going at it, Faqu stalks towards them and nails them both. Grabbing them in headlocks, Faqu then delivers a headbutt to both at the same time, dropping both and coming out of it unphased. COLE That thick, Samoan cranium doing it's damage. And could Faqu be the difference maker in the Fatal 4-Way at the Halloween Spectacular, when he and James Blonde challenge for the Tag Team Titles? COACH It might take everyone else in that match to stop him. Just like it might do tonight. Faqu is caught from behind by Reject, who tries to take the fight to him but takes another thrust to the throat for his troubles. Meanwhile, Sandman9000 tries to eliminate Nathaniel Black but struggles to get the Brit up and over. Todd Cortez comes over to help out, but who we won't know as Sandman cuts him off with a mule kick just to be on the safe side. COLE So by my calculations, we've got four men left to enter. James Blonde for Cucaracha Internacional and CPA, Christian Wright and Theodore Moneymaker all for The Enterprise, who although they only have one man in right now still hold all the big cards. Able to get off the ropes, Black fends Sandman off with a European uppercut. Over comes Faqu, attacking Sandman from behind with a Mongolian Chop. The Cucaracha Internacional duo then combine, trying to put the Heartland Champion over the top! Sandman wraps his legs around the ropes to save himself and clings on, waiting until Reject and Thunderkid come over to bail him out. Across the ring, Bosley pounds away on Zack, but soon finds himself outnumbered as Rodez spins him around and lands a forearm. Leon and Zack then corner Bosley, teeing off with right hands on the Alpha Male. BOSLEY COME ON, IS THAT ALL YOU'VE GOT!? Apparantly not, as Leon and Zack boot him in the gut, then lift a leg each and hover him over the top rope! COLE We've got Bosley in trouble here, Black maybe in trouble over in that corner with The Deadly Alliance and Cucaracha Internacional trios... who's going to the Halloween Spectacular!? Don't go anywhere, we will be right back!! [b]*COMMERCIAL BREAK!*[/b] When we return, we no longer see Detective Bosley in peril, instead on the attack on Leon Rodez. That's thanks to Sandman9000 currently working on Zack Malibu. Meanwhile, the World Tag Team Champions Reject and Thunderkid double team Faqu, trying to lift him out with Nathaniel Black busy with supposed team-mate Todd Cortez. COLE Welcome back to HeldDOWN~! with this historic battle royal in progress and would you look at this scene Coach? COACH What in the HELL is Cortez thinking!? That's what I wanna know. Why is he going after Nathaniel Black!? If anybody should know about gang warfare it's this guy, so what is he doing!? COLE I'd think that's pretty self-explanatory Coach. Cortez doesn't care about Cucaracha Internacional and the feeling's mutual. This is all about bein one of the last two for The Urban Legend. Black nails Cortez with a knee to break his flurry of forearms, then delivers a European uppercut. Grabbing Cortez behind the head he then tosses him over the top... ...but Cortez SKINS THE CAT! COLE Great agility! With that dealt with Black starts to go to help Faqu, but before he can do so Cortez spins him around... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and cracks him with a chop. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" And another. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" And a third. Black doubles over for a second, but uses it to his advantage with a headbutt to the sternum, surprising Cortez. Black then looks for an irish whip. Cortez reverses though, pulling Black back into a boot and setting him up ready for the RIOT ACT PLUS... ...NO! Bosley charges and levels him with a clothesline to put pay to that! BOSLEY YEAH! YEAH! *pounds chest* THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT!! Fired up, Bosley turns around... and Black shows his gratitude by delivering the BLACK LARIAT!! COACH Nathaniel Black really likes nobody. I doubt he even likes Landon, Blonde or Faqu all that much. COLE He wouldn't be the only one. As Cortez gets to his feet, Black then grabs a hold of him... ...AND HURLS HIM UP AND OVER THE TOP!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Cucaracha Internacional, eliminating Cucaracha Internacional. COACH Good, eliminating not so good. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TODD CORTEZ ENTERED: #1, Cucaracha Internacional LEFT: 3rd ELIMINATED: None ELIMINATED BY: Nathaniel Black Left in ring: Thunderkid, Leon Rodez, Sandman9000, Nathaniel Black, Zack Malibu, Reject, Faqu, Detective Bosley ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Finally Black is able to get over and help out Faqu, one of his preferred CI allies, by grabbing Reject and peeling him away. A headbutt sends Reject collapsing to the canvas. TK runs over to help out, but Black delivers a headbutt to him as well. Black stays on the attack on Reject, while Leon runs over and dives at Faqu with some forearm shots. Lifting him up in his arms, Faqu tosses Rodez away with ease though. As Leon picks himself up, Faqu then shuffles his large frame to deliver a Thrust Kick! COACH See, Cucaracha Internacional don't even need Cortez out there. Not when they've got Faqu. Get Cortez outta the way and get on with it, that's what I say! COLE And they've got more coming right now! Right on cue, we see a confident James Blonde jogging out, applauding his best buddy (besides Landon, of course!) BUFFER Block 3 of this match now begins. Now entering, the fourth and final representative for Cucaracha Internacional... hailing from Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. One third of the OAOAST 6-Man Tag Team Champions! He is "THE TRENDSETTER"... JJJJJAAAAAAAMMMMMEEEEESSSSSS... BBLLLLLOOOOOONNDDEEEEEEEE!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE And that means we've got all three of the 6-Man Champions in there for Cucaracha Internacional now. As Blonde takes an eternity to take off all his trendsetting entrance attire, the other entrant at Block 3 makes his way out as well, to similarly negative reactions. BUFFER And representative number four for The Enterprise... now residing in Washington D.C. He weighs in at approximately '8 and 1/3 BARS OF GOLD'... The Financial Analyst of The Enterprise, this is "THE NATURAL"... CCHHHRRRIIISSTTIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAANN... WWWWRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGHHHHHHTT!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Wright sets his briefcase aside and starts to remove his polyester jacket, taking almost as much time as Blonde to prepare himself. COACH Hey, what's that all about? This man relocated to this city, our nation's capital and they show their appreciation by booing him? COLE I don't think Financial Analysts are too popular anywhere in the country right now, Coach. Especially in Washington. COACH True dat. COLE And especially if they're named Christian Wright. Finally Wright and Blonde join the fray, rolling in and immediately finding themselves going at it! Meanwhile, Faqu drills Thunderkid with a headbutt. Faqu then catches Sandman coming towards him, fending him off with a headbutt as well. The wave of bodies keeps coming though, Zack now going after his former rival. Predictably Faqu stays with what's working... but Zack expects it and throws his arms up across his face. That blocks enough of the headbutt for him to strike back, attacking Faqu's bulky midsection with open handed thrusts before closing the fists on some lefts and rights! Faqu finds himself backed against the ropes and Zack reaches down, trying to grab a leg and start lifting the Samoan towards elimination. But Faqu SLAPS him across the back, then slams Zack's head off of his knee. COLE Not many men capable of doing that! As Zack goes bowling away though, Faqu looks up to see Thunderkid thundering towards him... ...and NAILING HIM WITH A CLOTHESLINE... ...SENDING FAQU OVER THE TOP... BUT TK'S MOMENTUM TAKES HIM RIGHT THE WAY OVER WITH THE SAMOAN AS WELL!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COLE OH MY! Thunderkid just EXPLODED into life and eliminated the mighty Samoan Wrecking Ball, but he commited battle royal suicide in the process! COACH The momentum it took to get Faqu over, it's no surprise. If you're clotheslining a guy who's 300 pounds with enough force to knock him over the top rope, the only thing stopping you is concrete. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ FAQU ENTERED: #3, Cucaracha Internacional LEFT: 4th ELIMINATED: None ELIMINATED BY: Thunderkid ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ THUNDERKID ENTERED: #1, Deadly Alliance LEFT: 5th ELIMINATED: Ned Blanchard, Faqu ELIMINATED BY: N/A Left in ring: Leon Rodez, Sandman9000, Nathaniel Black, Zack Malibu, Reject, Detective Bosley, James Blonde, Christian Wright ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Picking themselves up, Thunderkid and Faqu start to go at it again on the arena floor, drawing a flood of officials (well, three) over to try and seperate them. Distracted by his partner's elimination, James Blonde walks over and tries to get Faqu to calm down. As he turns around though, he little expects what's waiting... ...Reject, like a snake in the grass, striking with the EULOGY~!~1!!!~!! COACH BAM! Reject hops back to his feet and smirks down at Blonde... *SMACK* ...BEFORE THE SMIRK IS WIPED OFF HIS FACE VIA SCHOOL'S OUT!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE There's your 'BAM!' right there! Even before the kick has set in, Zack quickly turns around and charges Detective Bosley... ...AND CLOTHESLINES HIM UP AND OVER THE TOP TO THE FLOOR!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE AND THERE'S AN ELIMINATION!! Zack puts out the Alpha Male! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ DETECTIVE BOSLEY ENTERED: #3, The Enterprise LEFT: 6th ELIMINATED: None ELIMINATED BY: Zack Malibu Left in ring: Leon Rodez, Sandman9000, Nathaniel Black, Zack Malibu, Reject, James Blonde, Christian Wright ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Bosley flips out on the floor, Christian Wright looks to avenge his team-mate as he attacks Malibu. After wearing Zack down to his knees Wright locks on a front facelock, elevating Zack up for the gordbuster... NO! Zack escapes by driving his knee into the top of CW's head while upside down! COLE That's an innovative way to save yourself. Zack lands on his feet and grabs Wright looking to throw him out, but Wright goes deadweight before being thrown and just falls into the ropes. Not dettered, Zack continues to try and dump him out anyway. Across the ring, Nathaniel Black has Leon Rodez in a similar position looking for the elimination. Sandman9000 walks over and Black 'encourages' him to help him out... so Sandman nails him with a forearm instead. Away reels Black, while Sandman takes over on Leon. COLE Uh-oh. Uh-oh is right, for everybody in the ring, as the lone entrant in this block makes his way to the ring, CPA. BUFFER Entering in Block 4, the fifth representative for The Enterprise... from Miami, Florida and weighing two hundred, eighty pounds... CHRISTOPHER PATRICK ALLEN... C... P... A!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" After getting hyped up by his V.I.C.E team-mate Bosley in the aisle, CPA enters the ring and immediately goes after Zack Malibu, surprising him with a bodyshot from behind. COLE And right after Zack! CPA, I'm sure on strict orders from Theodore Moneymaker, who surprise surprise will be coming out last in this battle royal. CPA continues to lay into the body of The Franchise with his heavy right hands, CW eventually lending a hand after getting his bearings back. They double-team Zack while Sandman9000 is forced to try and fight off Rodez, coming back with forearms. Sandman gets the better of the forearm exchange predictably enough. Hitting the ropes, he then goes for the Yakuza Kick... but Leon ducks and catches Sandman turning around with an Inverted Atomic Drop! Leon then trips the Heartland Champion up and applies the LIONTAMER!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Rodez has got Sandman trapped! COACH Yeah, but no submissions... and even if there were, Sandman wouldn't quit anyway. COLE This ought to soften Sandman9000 up a little though. With Sandman growling in pain, Nathaniel Black staggers over... and throws up his hands, leaving him to it!! "YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" COACH Well, I guess that was deserved. Black instead goes after Reject who's just gotten to his feet, trapping him in a corner and delivering elbow smashes. With Reject dazed, Black then looks for an elimination. But Reject is able to place the sole of his boot in Nathaniel's face, SLAPPING it back against the skull twice to free himself. COLE Nasty shots from Reject, this man has been vicious in recent months. COACH Yeah and he's also been successful, which is all that matters in the end... Grabbing Black's head, Reject sends him face-first into the top turnbuckle. As Reject backs away though, he suddenly feels a tug on his tights and goes stumbling forward... ...ALL THE WAY OVER THE TOP TO THE FLOOR, AT THE HANDS OF LEON RODEZ!!!!! "YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE OH YEAH!! COACH NO! COLE REJECT IS GONE!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ REJECT ENTERED: #3, Deadly Alliance LEFT: 7th ELIMINATED: None ELIMINATED BY: Leon Rodez Left in ring: Leon Rodez, Sandman9000, Nathaniel Black, Zack Malibu, James Blonde, Christian Wright, CPA ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A furious Reject slams the ring apron and almost takes a swing at a referee, before getting even angrier seeing Leon waving to him from the ring. Reject tries to jump back in but the referees pull him away and send him heading to the back, much to his dismay. COLE A little bit of poetic justice, a small measure of payback, Reject gone at the hands of Leon Rodez! COACH What a sneaky move. He had the tights, he came in from behind... ugh! COLE Hey, look on the bright side, at least now Reject won't have to pull double-duty next week. COACH Shut up. With Reject (unhappily) on his way, Leon rushes over to help out Zack against CW and CPA. He slams the heads together with the trusty Double Noggin Knocker, then tries to dump Wright out! CPA clubs him with a double axehandle though. As Leon goes down, Zack jumps on CPA's back, only for the bigman to throw back an elbow, catching Zack right in the temple! COLE Ooh! Zack got caught hard there! CPA spins Leon around and wraps on a bearhug. Meanwhile, a reeling Zack staggers backwards... ...and before he knows what's hit him, HE SPILLS TO THE FLOOR AS BLACK DELIVERS A EUROPEAN UPPERCUT!!!! COLE WOAH, there goes Zack!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ZACK MALIBU ENTERED: #2, In Crowd LEFT: 8th ELIMINATED: Simon Singleton, Detective Bosley ELIMINATED BY: Nathaniel Black Left in ring: Leon Rodez, Sandman9000, Nathaniel Black, James Blonde, Christian Wright, CPA ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE Boy, that's a big surprise. Zack Malibu gone! COACH Nat doesn't enjoy much, but I can assure you he damn sure enjoyed that. COLE And the most relieved man in the building right now is Theodore Moneymaker, because now Zack won't have the chance to get his hands on him! COACH Even better! Not resting back on the elimination, no matter how satisfying, Black quickly targets Christian Wright and takes the fight to him. Meanwhile Sandman9000 is up and notices the one man free, James Blonde, curled up under the bottom rope. COLE Has Blonde done anything since he entered? Besides taking the Eulogy? COACH Well, he had that sweet jacket on... COLE I rest my case. Sandman walks over and grabs Blonde, dragging him off the ropes... ...but Blonde surprises him and pulls him forward... ...OVER THE TOP, BUT TO THE APRON ONLY!!! COLE No no, Sandman hangs on! The ever pleased with himself JB celebrates the elimination, only to feel that sinking feeling with the crowd telling him to turn around. Already begging off, Blonde takes a boot and gets planted with the ARCHANGEL'S WINGS!!~!1!!!~1!! COLE It's not been a great night to be The Trendsetter. Sandman casually picks Blonde up... ...and just as casually deposits him over the top!!! COLE Nope, not a good night at all. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ JAMES BLONDE ENTERED: #4, Cucaracha Internacional LEFT: 9th ELIMINATED: None ELIMINATED BY: Sandman9000 Left in ring: Leon Rodez, Sandman9000, Nathaniel Black, Christian Wright, CPA ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Blonde hits the floor, the cheers turn to boos, as sauntering to the ring comes the last but not least leader of The Enterprise, Theodore Moneymaker. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your final entrant, representative number six and LEADER of The Enterprise! Hailing from Vero Beach, Florida... weighing two hundred, thirty seven pounds... "THE BILLION DOLLAR HEIR" THHHHEEEEOOOOODDOOOOORRRREEE... MMMMOOOONNEEEEYYYMMMAAAAKKEEEEERRRR!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" COACH The Messiah! Get it right! COLE The self-styled Messiah and he enters the ring in prime position. Not yet he doesn't. Reaching ringside, Theodore Moneymaker stands back with his arms folded and decides not to join the match just yet, despite the referees telling him to do so. "TED - DY SUCKS!" "TED - DY SUCKS!" "TED - DY SUCKS!" "TED - DY SUCKS!" As abuse is flung Moneymaker's way, all of which he rises above, the battle continues in the ring with the other five remaining. Sandman9000 sneaks up behind CPA, kicking him in the back which breaks his bearhug on Leon. Worn out, he falls to the mat, while Sandman lands forearm shots to CPA. One big punch to the ribs from the former ex-boxer cuts Sandman off though. With the Heartland Champ doubled over, CPA then preps the fist... and lands a knockout shot to the head!! COLE There's not many who can put Sandman9000 down with one strike, but CPA is definately high on that list. CPA turns around and clubs Nathaniel Black with a double axehandle, saving Christian Wright from elimination. Turning him around, he delivers body shots to the Englishman before pinning his arms behind his back. CW quickly hops to the middle rope and lands a fist, before CPA puts Black down with a clothesline. COACH Boy, it's looking good for The Enterprise now, huh Cole? COLE Well that might have something to do with the fact that Wright and CPA both entered after everybody else in the match and Theodore Moneymaker hasn't even gotten that far yet! COACH Mere details. All I know is, everybody else has one guy left, The Enterprise have three. With things going his men's way, Moneymaker finally takes off his white robe and starts to enter the match. Halfway up the steps though, he stops, seeing Leon Rodez get to his feet... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and spin CW around into a chop! CPA reacts... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...but gets chopped as well! *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" Chop for CW. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" Chop to CPA. With both men reeling, Leon turns and hits the ropes... ...but Moneymaker catches his ankle, causing him to stumble into a knee from CPA. The bigman then whips Leon into Tne Natural, who takes Rodez up and down with the WRIGHT OFF!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE And there's the numbers advantage. Not even three on one, could Moneymaker risk anything other than a sly trip from the floor though. COACH What are you talking about, he's getting in the ring, isn't he? COLE Oh sure, now he is! Sliding in, Moneymaker wears a big smile on his face as he congratulates his men on a good well done. Not a job completed though. Moneymaker quickly orders his troops as Sandman staggers back to his feet. CPA quickly grabs him, scooping and slamming the veteran. Moneymaker then shooes him out of the way, before delivering a FISTFUL OF DOLLARS~!~! COACH What a move! Textbook! COLE You've got to be kidding me. Lording it over Sandman as if he'd done all the damage, Moneymaker demands more. Christian quickly drags Leon over and steps aside, as Moneymaker falls back with another FISTFUL~!~! COACH Again! How impressive is Theodore Moneymaker looking right now? Look out World Championship! Moneymaker feels in fine form now and stalks Nathaniel Black as he gets to his feet. From behind, he delivers a big knee to the kidneys. Black falls into the ropes, bounced right back into Moneymaker's waiting arms and locked in the BANK VAU... ...NO!! Black slips out before the hold can be clamped in, ducking behind INTO THE CROSSFACE CHICKENWING!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH OH NO! [I]OH NO![/I] COLE MONEYMAKER'S CAUGHT! His boss's wails of pain get Christian's attentions and he quickly rushes to help... ...but Black ducks down AND CHRISTIAN ENDS UP TUMBLING OVER THE TOP!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHRISTIAN WRIGHT ENTERED: #4, The Enterprise LEFT: 10th ELIMINATED: None ELIMINATED BY: Nathaniel Black Left in ring: Leon Rodez, Sandman9000, Nathaniel Black, CPA, Theodore Moneymaker ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE Things don't look quite so good now! Luckily for Moneymaker, CPA makes a better job of saving him with a hard punch to Black's exposed ribs. As Black stumbles away from the ropes, CPA then measures him up. Coming off the ropes, he loads up the GIGATON PUNCH... ...BUT SANDMAN CATCHES HIM OFF THE ROPES WITH A YAKUZA KICK, SENDING HIM SPILLING UP AND OUT OF THE MATCH!!!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE WHAT A SHOT!! There goes CPA, there goes the numbers advantage! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CPA ENTERED: #5, The Enterprise LEFT: 11th ELIMINATED: None ELIMINATED BY: Sandman9000 Left in ring: Leon Rodez, Sandman9000, Nathaniel Black, Theodore Moneymaker ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Before Sandman can pull his leg from across the top rope though, Theodore Moneymaker plays opportunist AND DUMPS HIM OVER THE TOP RIGHT ONTO CPA!!!! COLE And just like that, we're down to three! The Heartland Champion got caught! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ SANDMAN9000 ENTERED: #2, The Enterprise LEFT: 12th ELIMINATED: James Blonde, CPA ELIMINATED BY: Theodore Moneymaker Left in ring: Leon Rodez, Nathaniel Black, Theodore Moneymaker ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Theodore Moneymaker afford himself a laugh, even after seeing his two team-mates eliminated seconds apart. As he turns around, the laughing stops. Very abruptly, as he sees Nathaniel Black and Leon Rodez both staring at him. "YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!" COACH Eek! COLE Oh boy! It's down to Moneymaker, Rodez and Black. Two of these men will fight for the number one contendership on Halloween night! Caught in a bad position, Moneymaker does what anyone in his position would... he flashes the "money fingers", hoping to buy someone off! He tries to convince both that they only need to eliminate the other and they'll face him in eight days, easy as. Both Black and Rodez are unmoved though and Moneymaker backs up, until he can back up no further. Just when The Messiah looks at his most vulnerable though, Black turns around and surprises Leon with a Lariat from the left side! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Moneymaker breathes a sigh of relief and pats Black on the back... ...earning a Lariat of his own!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COLE Sure enough, Nathaniel Black doesn't care about money. And he damn sure doesn't care about either man left in this battle royal with him. He just cares about the number one contendership. Picking Moneymaker up, Black grabs a hold of the hair and with the Washington crowd cheering, he runs him towards the ropes... but Moneymaker drops to a knee and with a quick pull of the tights, drags Black face-first into the middle turnbuckle! COLE Well, if Moneymaker's going to make it to The Halloween Spectacular, he's going to have to do it on his own merits now. And that's as good a start as any. COACH Mister Moneymaker's more than capable, don't you worry. Just because he's got a large support staff backing him, people make out like he's a coward or something. COLE Heaven forbid. COACH Exactly! Propping Black chest-first in the corner, Moneymaker begins to club away at the shoulders with forearms, then works on the kidneys with some well placed knees. Meanwhile, Leon is pulling himself back up. Shaking out the cobwebs, he charges. Moneymaker moves out of the way, so Leon lands an elbow on Black. Coming out of the corner Rodez gets caught with a boot though, set up for a Piledriver. Kicking his legs, Leon is able to block once, then twice, before tripping the legs and looking for the Liontamer!! Moneymaker won't go though and before Leon can turn him, Black appears in front of him and delivers another hard Lariat... ...causing Leon to slingshot Moneymaker into the turnbuckles as he hits the mat!! COLE Here we go! As Moneymaker staggers off the turnbuckles, Black is measuring him. He charges, looking for a final Lariat... ...but Moneymaker dips the head, BACKDROPPING BLACK UP... ...AND ONTO THE APRON!! COLE Oh, so close! COACH Black's still not safe yet though. Black is able to get to his feet before Moneymaker can force him the rest of the way, a slugfest ensuing between the two. Moneymaker chops Black a couple of times, but Black responds by blocking a right hand and elbowing The Messiah. And again. Black then tries to get back into the ring... but a BILLION $ KNEELIFT stops him in his tracks! Black falls back out to the apron and Moneymaker reaches over to pick him up. An elbow further rocks Black, before Moneymaker grabs a hold of the head and prepares to hang him across the top rope... but Black breaks free of the grip, AND NAILS MONEYMAKER WITH A LARIAT!! COLE Oh man! Black almost caved Teddy's chest in with that one! Still Black isn't safe though, as before he can think of re-entering the ring, Leon Rodez springs into life. He leaps to the middle rope and springboards, delivering a dropkick... ...AND BLACK GRABS THE MIDDLE ROPE ON HIS WAY DOWN, FEET HOVERING INCHES FROM ELIMINATION!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAA...." COLE Is he..... can he..... COACH He's gotta go, he's gotta, surely! Picking himself up, Leon seems surprised to see Black hanging in, albeit by his fingertips. The Silky Smooth One smirks and makes a move towards the Englishman. But as he does, Theodore Moneymaker stands up and catches his eye. Taking a last look at Black desperately hanging on, Leon looks up and shrugs... ...BEFORE TOSSING MONEYMAKER OUT INSTEAD!!!! "YYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" *DINGDINGDING!* COLE That's it! We've got our winners! COACH .....WHAT THE HELL DID HE DO THAT FOR!?! That's exactly what Theodore Moneymaker is asking, as he looks up to see Nathaniel Black finally able to let go of the ropes and safely hit the floor on the referee's assurance. Moneymaker holds his head in his hands, as Black then rolls back into the ring, joining Leon in having his hand raised in joint victory. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ THEODORE MONEYMAKER ENTERED: #6, The Enterprise LEFT: 13th ELIMINATED: Sandman9000 ELIMINATED BY: Leon Rodez ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE So it will be, next week in Miami, Leon Rodez and Nathaniel Black, with the winner to get the World Title shot at November Reign! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ BATTLE ROYAL CO-WINNER: NATHANIEL BLACK ELIMINATED: Todd Cortez, Zack Malibu, Christian Wright BATTLE ROYAL CO-WINNER: LEON RODEZ ELIMINATED: Reject, Theodore Moneymaker ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With Moneymaker being led away from the ring, distraught, Leon can't help but rub it in even further by offering his 'apologies' to The Messiah. Fuming, Moneymaker points the finger at The Silky Smooth One, who just shrugs his shoulders again. COACH I'm still waiting for answer, what the HELL did Rodez do that for!? COLE Well, I don't know! I don't know if he just wanted Moneymaker gone, or just saw an opportunity, thought Black was going to get himself back in. I doubt it was out of any respect for Natha... *WHAM!* Suddenly, the celebrating Leon gets caught and NAILED with a Lariat by Nathaniel Black! COACH Haha, there we go! COLE Now wait, the match is over! COACH Not for Nat Black it ain't! The referees wave wildly at Black to try and stop him, as he picks Leon back up. Crossing the arms under the chest the Englishman SPITS towards the zebra-stripes, before lifting Rodez up and PLANTING him with the BRITTANIA BOMB!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Black shoves Rodez's body away from him as he stands up, raising his arms and announcing himself as the one true winner. COLE That's certainly a strange show of gratitude! If it wasn't for Rodez, Black wouldn't have made it to the Halloween Spectacular, let alone have been left standing right now! COACH Yeah, but he is. That's a message if ever I saw one. COLE Folks, we hope you join us Halloween night, Black and Rodez for real plus the 5-Man Prism Match for the World Title and SO much more, you don't want to miss it! For The Coach, I'm Michael Cole, we'll see you in Miami! *FADE TO BLACK*

bob's right. It's just a loophole. Sure it's kinda dumb, but that's all it is.