NYU

Yes, she can. -=Mike Then what is the debate here? If we turn off breathing machines and people stay alive, do we shove a pillow on their face until they stop? Michael Schiavo says Terri did not want to live like this. He says that she had already previously made it clear that if she were in this kind of condition, she would want to die. Some people think Michael's intentions are pure, with him simply wanting to do what Terri had asked for. Others believe he has different motives here and that he will somehow benefit from Terri's death. The parents are saying Michael's testimony is false and that she should remain alive -- even if it may have actually been against her wishes. There's more here, but I'll spare you the excess details. I don't see why you couldn't read through the first few pages of the thread to understand that. And sorry, but a breathing machine is not much different than a feeding tube. Both are essential mechanical tools needed for someone to survive. Someone needing an artificial respirator will die if they do not have it. Someone needing a feeding tube will die if they do not have it. Mike can go on and on about how Terri has the ability do drink water and eat pudding/jello based on the testimony of a few nurses -- but there's testimony from other doctors and nurses that indicate this idea is false as well. So to take one side of that issue blindly without considering the other side of the issue is just absurd.

....if she's in pain, then why the hell would the parents want to keep her artificially alive anyway? That piece of evidence certainly doesn't help the case to keep the food tube inserted.

I hate when you respond to every single sentence in my post, because I then feel the need to respond to each one of those posts. And thus, I'm on the computer for hours when I have no intention to be. Oh well. After years of having to cope with the realization that his wife was never going to come back to him. The deceased spouse argument all over again. Once a case is taken to court, this is how the court system works. In the eyes of the law, Michael has the ruling over Terri over anything else. Seeing as how he's the life partner, the decision should come down to him over the biological parents. It's a shame this couldn't have been worked out privately, but you can't go back to the past. He still has feelings for her, even if he doesn't sit there and talk to her as if he was talking to a wall. Once again -- deceased spouse argument. Fine. I forgot to include that she has the ability to breathe and blink. He's determined to make sure his wife dies because this is what he said she wanted. According to him, the parents are going completely against her wishes. Why is he expected to just step to the side and allow that to happen? Because he moved on with his life and met another woman after YEARS of pining over his wife? You say it's "completely fucking irrelevant" that Michael was faithful to his wife during marriage. I say that's bullshit. I think it points a gaping hole in your theories that he didn't care about preserving the sanctity of marriage. When the marriage was actually ALIVE, he stayed faithful to her. When the marriage became nothing more than a FIGUREHEAD -- and it became a figurehead from the point where everyone realized Terri was never going to get better from her current state -- he took a few years to grieve before deciding that he needed to move on with his life. As the Schindlers said he should! Oops. I'm beginning to think you have no idea what staying faithful even means. He says he's acting in her best interests and on her behalf. He believes the family is not. Meeting a new woman after your wife has become little more than a potted plant does not mean that your marriage has been sacrified. It had already been sacrificed long ago. That's what happens with human nature. Marriage does not mean blind, undying -- and to a point, non-sensical -- devotion. Reason has to be included in there someplace. Incapacitated with a broken arm? Absolutely not. Incapacitated with paralysis for 15 YEARS?! The situation becomes different there. Technically, in the law's eyes, it's not. Realistically -- it should be. But people sometimes have to go by the books instead of what makes sense. Said nothing about my regard for women. Was more about my definition for marriage. But extra points in attempting to trap me in a sexist statement. If he divorces her, he loses ALL rights to have an impact in decisions over her life. He doesn't want that since he strongly disagrees in what the parents have planned for her. And the Christopher Reeves situation, as others have pointed out, was simply different. Seeing as how he could talk and provide his wife someone to interact with, thus ensuring that she does not feel completely alone. Terri could not do that. I can't keep continuing with this point-by-point analysis. Mike, if you desperately desire me to further elaborate, I will do so. But I think my point is now clear.

Really sorry to hear this. Luckily, you've found out about this before the situation became too dire. Best of luck.

He's had numerous chances to get a clean divorce from his wife. He didn't take it. Obviously, that's not what he's seeking. And just how much of this malpractice settlement is he going to be getting? Considering most of the funds have been squandered already, I doubt it would be enough to justify going through this process solely on the basis of receiving a rather unimpressive sum of money. You're saying that he has absolutely no care about the best interest of Terri Schiavo here? Because then he still has an impact on Terri's status and what happens to her. Once he gets that divorce, that's it. He doesn't have any right to make a decision for her. He's kept his marriage to her so the parents wouldn't get primary rights over their daughter and thus keep her alive until she's nothing more than a stump with eyes. Mockery of the entire institution of marriage? Perhaps I missed something here, but did Michael definitively cheat on Terri while she was still in perfect mental condition? Or did he go to find a new life companion only after years of suffering through Terri's condition and realizing he was never going to get her back to where she was ever again? You know how when a spouse dies, the husband or wife does an appropriate amount of grieving then, many times, try to move on? Sometimes, they even find someone else to marry and spend their lives with. Mike, this is the same type of situation. Terri has provided him no comfort whatsoever in fifteen years. She can't talk. She can't move. She can't satisfy him sexually -- which, if you're talking about the insitution of marriage, should be a necessary criteria anyway. Even with Terri by his side, it would still be like Michael is alone. He can't move on and try to find a new companion? Try to start a new life besides pining for a person that's never going to mentally improve? In my opinion, he cares about Terri. He wishes to see her improve but, unlike her parents, he is a realist. He realizes that's never going to happen. Going by what he said, she once wished that she would never be in the vegetative state she currently is. In order to make this so, he would HAVE to stay married to her. He would have to STAY married to her to, in essence, preserve the sanctity of marriage -- following through with the desires of the spouse. But see, it seems as if there has been an indication. Michael, and two relatives of Terri Schiavo, have said she made it clear she did not want to live on life support. Even if you think Michael had something to gain by this -- what the hell would Terri's own relatives gain with her death? They wouldn't receive a penny! Why would they make something like this up besides just being bastards for the sake of being bastards? You have Michael and two Schiavo relatives saying Terri explictly say this. Have the parents ever heard her say explictly that she DID wish to live on life support if she were ever paralyzed without the ability to do much of anything? Have they ever made this clear in court? You have one side saying she DID make her side known on an issue like this. You have the other side not even hearing a word about it while Terri was alive. But it IS hearsay, either way. Of course, there are other doctors and nurses that have the opposite opinion as well. What's more likely? That the condition of her brain has IMPROVED over the past three years, or that it has stayed the same and possibly even WORSENED? Sure, there's always a chance her brain might be improving itself. But it's a slim chance. A tiny chance. A chance that, for all intents and purposes, just isn't helpful. It would go against every single historical trend of medicine. And we haven't even seen Terri show any improvements in her behavior or physical stature that indicate that such a process has happened. I don't think the idea that she hasn't had a neurological exam in three years matters much. Many in this country just don't want to see Terri live a meaningless life consisting of sitting in a chair without a cohesive thought in her mind, possibly even being held there against her own will. Painting it that way, perhaps life DOES mean something to them. Again, he could just be damned determined to see her die TO honor her wishes. You say that he's unfaithful to the concepts of marriage -- then, when he actually DOES try to stay faithful to them, you say his attempts are a sham. How could he possibly win you over with his intentions at this point besides shunning any fundamentals of gaining a normal life and instead choosing to kneel by his 15-year paralyzed wife 24/7. The seven year gap in forgetting her wishes seems odd to me too, but I don't think we know for sure he never mentioned the idea for seven full years. It may have just became a central issue after seven years of her paralysis instead. Again, I bring up the case of a deceased spouse. Even if that husband or wife has died years ago, and the person has since moved on with their lives, they STILL have caring feelings for them. For all intents and purposes, Terri IS dead to Michael. She offers nothing more than a deceased person would. Yet, even though he has moved on with his life, he could still have caring feelings for her. He could want to see the best done for her, even if he has moved on with his life. It's almost the same situation. Too dramatic.

After reading through this entire thread, I just have a quick question for Mike: What exactly does Michael Schiavo gain by now asking for his wife's death? Nearly all the settlement funds have been sucked dry. He's pretty much finished spending money in an effort to keep her alive. Other groups have been trying to contribute vast amounts of cash to do that exact thing, and he's turned down all of them. He has a different life now with a new woman -- it's not as if he needs Terri to die in order to continue with an extracurricular relationship and a revised sex life. He's already done a decent job doing so. What in the world could Michael Schiavo possibly gain by asking for Terri to finally die? I think it's more likely to believe that Schiavo finally wants the hell Terri has been living in to end, on the basis that she -- herself -- did not want to live life in a vegetative state. Rather than believe that Schiavo wants Terri to die for absolutely no reason at all. He gets no financial restitutions. He could get a divorce if he so desired it, which he doesn't. He's had the option to wipe his hands clean of the entire situation, and he's chosen not to. If he's not getting anything for being so heavily involved, why in the hell would he want to stay so heavily involved in the first place if he didn't truly care about her well-being?

1. Taxi Driver 2. Basic Instinct 3. A Few Good Men 4. Forrest Gump 5. When Harry Met Sally 6. Braveheart 7. Pulp Fiction 8. Dirty Harry And after rewatching that Taxi Driver segment again, Batista quite clearly says either "fricking directors" or "freaking directors." That's it. The people on the other side of the debate need to call defeat on this one.

Because Google is such a difficult concept to understand.

From Backlash 2004 - the Raw after SummerSlam 2004, yes, Orton had the crowd involved in his matches. Orton really was popular through that stretch. It was only when he turned face that he suddenly "had no future".

Off the top of my head for the higher guys in the federation: Vince McMahon, Randy Orton, Kane, Edge, Rob Van Dam, Eric Bischoff, Theodore Long, and any of the Dudleys...

The commercial's up somewhere on WWE.com now. For some reason, the Cole cameo is the funniest part of the commercial.

Nash wasn't the kind of guy that needed to be built up at that point. He was already as established as he was going to get, people saw him as a full-time Main Eventer, and the end of Goldberg's streak at Starrcade just seemed illogical since it hardly received any hype. This isn't the same type of situation. Unlike Nash, Orton is someone that sorely needs credibility. This is one of those do-or-die situations -- if he doesn't get the fans to follow along with him, whether he is face or heel, he might never be able to do it. Unlike Nash, Orton is one of those part-time Main Eventers that are flirting on the edge of being a full-time headliner on the Raw brand. Nash was at that level for WCW, but Randy's not there yet. And unlike the end of Goldberg's streak hardly being hyped, the entire focus of this WrestleMania surrounds the Undertaker's winning streak at Mania and Orton's goal to put an end to it. This wasn't the case at XX against Kane or XIX against A-Train/Big show or X8 against Flair. But it finally is a focus point this year. The Nash/Goldberg and Orton/Taker comparison does not hold water. Besides holding the opinion that Taker's record at WrestleMania should be remembered for alltime so he won't be forgotten, there's no logical reason for him winning at Mania. You need to build new stars -- regardless of whether or not the Internet community thinks this star is worth sacrificing a meaningless win streak over. Keep in mind, for all intents and purposes, Orton has now turned heel again. Most people around mid-2004 loved Orton as a heel and turned on him as a face. How do we know this situation might not happen again? For all we know, it could be the beginnings of the Kurt Angle syndrome all over again. To build new stars, chances need to be taken. Having Orton beat Taker at WrestleMania is one of those chances.

The best commercial yet. "Now that wasn't my fault." And what was up with Cole there?

I'm not typically a Triple H hater, but that was an awful promo. HHH sitting in a chair for near 20 minutes as he spoke only made it worse.

There's not a chance at all.

The show was a little on the short side, but overall, not too bad. I would have liked to see a few more segments and a little more hype-up for AngleMania, considering we now only have two more HeldDowns until the big Pay-Per-View. But overall, the stuff that was here was nice, and it did a fine job of setting up most feuds. More detailed feedback later -- maybe. If I can.

So am I to assume it's not Jerry Lawler then?

COLE Main event time is now! CABOOSE Awesome grammar. COACH This match is gonna be off the charts hot! YEAH-UH~! CABOOSE Yeah. COACH LI'L JON IN THA HOUSE, KEEPIN' IT CRUNK, YEAH-UH~! CABOOSE What. COACH O-KAY~! CABOOSE He gets worse every week, folks. COLE This tag team contest came about as a result of last week's chaotic events! Drek Stone and Crystal teamed up to get the better of Axel! COACH Yeah, but Drek got more than he bargained for! WHAT?! YEAH-UH~! COLE Indeed, Drek fell victim to a spinebuster as Hoff came down to rescue Axel! CABOOSE Ah, but Axel didn't want rescuing! COLE After taking Drek out, Hoff was on the verge of laying into Crystal, when he was stopped by Axel! CABOOSE Axel is wrapped around her little finger, Cole. Just like Li'l Coach is. Or was, I can't keep it straight anymore. COACH YEAH-UH~! CABOOSE YOU can't keep ANYTHING straight. COACH WHAT?! CABOOSE I said, you can't keep anything straight. COACH WHAT?! CABOOSE I-- oh, f*** it. COACH O-KAY~! COLE Axel took Hoff down with a big chokeslam, which left him open to a BRUTAL chairshot by Crystal! CABOOSE In the end, all three Anglemania title contenders were left lying, and that all prompted Josie to make this match! "Black" kicks in over the arena loudspeakers to a HUGE ovation!! The fans roar as... *BOOM*BOOM*BOOM*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOM* Silver fireworks explode on the stage, and through the smoke steps HOFF! The Texan fans cheer like crazy as the big man waves them to their feet! Hoff points out to several "Hoff" signs in the crowd, then stops midway down the aisle to pose with a group of lovely young ladies holding a "WE *heart* HOFF" sign. Hoff kneels below the girls and flexes, smiling as the ladies pat his oversized muscles. COACH Now that's a playa. Hoff is the kind of guy everyone can love, because he's good-looking, but he kicks ass too. COLE He is pretty. CABOOSE Did you just say that Hoff is "pretty?!?" COLE NO!! Shut up shut up shut up!!! Hoff laughs and stands back up, walking the rest of the way down the aisle and sliding into the ring. Hoff adjusts his kneepad as he gets up, then climbs up the near corner. With one foot on the second strand and one on the top, Hoff raises his fist into the air. Flashbulbs go off as Hoff closes his eyes, letting it all in for a second, before ROARING for the capacity crowd, sending them into a frenzy! COLE One of two #1 contenders, about to be joined by the other. "Black" fades, being replaced by the opening chords of "Down With the Sickness." Can you feel that... Shit... OOW-AH-AH-AH-AH! *BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM~!* A blaze of pyro signifies the entrance of the Dark One, AXEL!! The fans spring right back up to their feet as the spotlights shine on Axel, standing at the top of the ramp. Axel flashes the CRUCIFIX POSE~ to a BIG pop, then heads down the ramp with a dour expression. COLE Axel's life over the past few weeks has been a world of hurt. CABOOSE It's been a reality check, Cole. Axel won the Lethal Rumble and thought everything would be nice and easy. Since then, he's learned that it's rough at the top. I would know. COLE Yeah, but Caboose, the things he's been through lately? Everything with Crystal? No one deserves that! CABOOSE Hey, sometimes the road is lonely. Axel stops midway down the ring, staring a hole through the man in the ring, Hoff. Hoff looks back coolly, and Axel heads the rest of the way down. An "AX-EL" chant takes up in the crowd as the Dark One slides into the ring, climbing up the near turnbuckle and flashing the crucifix pose again. Axel climbs off, and he and Hoff stare at each other as his music dies down. COLE Are these two going to be able to get along? CABOOSE I hope not. I’ve exposed your lies, baby And underneath no big surprise Now it’s time for changing and cleansing everything To forget your love. The crowd BOOS like it was going out of style as "Plug in Baby" by Muse echo over the arena sound system. The boos intensify as the music's owner, the Female Phenom, CRYSTAL, steps onto the stage. Crystal looks over the crowd with arrogant disdain, before blowing a kiss to the ring. The beautiful and talented grappler sneers as Hoff starts jawing with her from afar, while Axel simply lowers his head. CABOOSE Crystal is playing head games, and winning. Although it's not hard when you're up against those two. Crystal's theme fades out, replaced by the mellow, hip sounds of A3's "Woke Up This Morning".... COLE All these songs available on the new OAOAST CD, by the way. ...heralding the arrival of the OAOAST World Champion, DREK STONE. Drek steps out onto the stage, wearing the World Title around his waist. Drek smirks as he looks over the crowd, who shows him no mercy. Drek shakes his head, then looks at Crystal, his partner for the night, nodding. The pair heads to the ring, and referee Charles Robinson has to forcibly hold Hoff back. COLE Crystal not wanting to head to the ring alone, and looking at Hoff it's not hard to see why. CABOOSE Well, hey, no sense in not giving yourself every advantage. COLE Make no mistake, fans; this Drek and Crystal partnership is definitely a marriage of convenience. These two don't like each other, but they have a common enemy in Axel, and of course Crystal and Hoff are no strangers. CABOOSE Hoff, the fluke champion, WISHES he could beat Crystal again. COLE He may get the chance. Tonight! Crystal climbs onto the ring apron, waving at her opponents, as Drek Stone climbs the ring steps. Both bad guys enter the ring, and Drek turns to the fans, pounding his chest and sending sparkling pyrotechnics shooting up from all corners. Meanwhile, Crystal stares at Axel, smiling as the brooding superstar stares at the ground. CABOOSE This is a volatile situation, ready to explode at any moment. I can't wait. Ring announcer Howard Finkel steps into the ring. I love Finkel. THE FINK Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL!! Introducing first, weighing in at 530 pounds, the team of AX-EL and HOFF!!!!!!!! The fans cheer the introduction of the heroes. Axel finally looks up, while Hoff pumps one fist into the air and gets the crowd all riled up. FINKEL And their opponents, weighing in at 373 pounds, the team of CRYSTAL and the OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION, DREK STOOOOOOOOOOONE!! The fans jeer the tandem as Drek holds his World Title into the air. Crystal stretches out, popping the wood of most of the audience. Fink makes his exit, as Robinson takes the title belt from Stone, handing it to the timekeeper. Drek says something to Crystal, and Crystal smiles, patting Drek on the chest and smiling. Drek smiles himself, and steps out of the ring and onto his corner. Crystal smiles as she looks at Axel. Axel stares at her....until Hoff shakes him. Axel turns to face Hoff, and the big man points to the apron. Hoff shakes his head as Axel solemnly steps onto the apron. And Robinson calls for the bell, sending us underway! *ding ding ding* COLE So it's Hoff and Crystal starting off. I wonder if Axel'll even be able to get into the ring tonight? CABOOSE No way, Cole! Axel couldn't hit Crystal if she had a mosquito on her arm. COLE But what if Drek Stone gets into the ring? CABOOSE Then he'll take Axel apart. Man, I dunno if I could even get up in the morning if I didn't have Drek Stone. As Caboose fawns over the man, Drek Stone shouts some unpleasantries toward Hoff, as he and Crystal circle in the ring. Hoff stops and turns to Drek, flipping him off to a BIG pop! Seizing the moment, Crystal darts toward Hoff, but Hoff nimbly sidesteps and nearly sends Crystal careening into Drek! The champion looks put off as Crystal puts on the brakes, waving her hands in the air. Crystal turns back around, and Hoff waves her on, popping the crowd yet again. Crystal and Hoff lock up, and Hoff flips her over with an armdrag! Hoff hops back up, and waits for Crystal to get to her feet! The Female Phenom skids across the ring, landing near Axel, and she stares at him as she gets back up. Axel turns his head away, but Crystal calls his name. As Hoff looks on with mild disgust, Crystal SLAPS Axel in the face! The crowd is aghast as Axel holds his face, GLARING at Crystal, but simply unable to respond. COLE Crystal has become so cold and callous! CABOOSE Long overdue change, I say. Crystal shakes her head as Drek laughs heartily in his corner...prompting Hoff to turn and WALLOP him in the jaw! Hoff nails Drek, who falls off the apron and lands sprawled on the ground. Hoff chuckles as Drek gets up with a start, FUMING at Hoff. Hoff blows on his knuckles and dusts them off, delighting the crowd, before turning back to Crystal. The two lock up again, as Drek tenatively makes his way back onto the apron. Hoff and Crystal jostle for position, and the big man wins, pushing Crystal back to a corner. Hoff applies the pressure as Robinson starts a five count, but Hoff gives a clean break, backing away from Crystal. Hoff keeps walking backwards...then turns and sprints up the opposite corner, facing the crowd and waving them up! The fans go BANANA as Hoff poses, showing off his impressive physique! CABOOSE Completely unnecessary. Hoff smiles and hops off the corner, turning back to face a pissed-off Crystal. Hoff begs her on again, and Crystal charges, but Hoff ducks a clothesline! Crystal turns, and eats a back elbow from the big man! Crystal stumbles into the neutral corner, and Hoff follows her in, laying in with a big right hand! Crystal reels, and Hoff fires off another punch, and another! The fans are cheering as Hoff whips Crystal across the ring, and charges after her -- but Crystal grabs the ropes and leaps over Hoff! Hoff puts on the brakes as Crystal soars over him, but the Female Phenom grabs him in a rear waistlock! Crystal strains her back as she tries to throw Hoff overhead, but the big man grabs the top rope! Crystal tries again, but Hoff stops her once more, then tears her hands off of his waist, breaking free and spinning around her! Hoff now grabs CRYSTAL in a waistlock, wrenches back, and tosses her overhead, but Crystal somehow lands on her feet!! Hoff falls onto his back, and quickly gets up...right into a dropsault by Crystal! Showing amazing agility, Crystal again lands on her feet as Hoff falls into the ropes! Hoff bounces off, and Crystal catches him with a deep armdrag, taking the big man over! Crystal hops up and runs off the ropes as Hoff gets to his feet, and catches the big man with a swinging neckbreaker! Crystal turns around and hops onto Hoff with a lateral press, but only gets two! Hoff kicks out with authority, and Crystal gets off of the big man. COACH Heh, Crystal's getting off. COLE I thought you didn't like her anymore? COACH I don't like Hilary Clinton, either, but that doesn't stop me from fapping to C-SPAN. CABOOSE That is BEYOND disgusting. Crystal waits for Hoff to find his feet, then grabs him by the neck and snapmares him over. The crowd gets on Crystal, jeering her as she applies a rear chinlock. Hoff fights up to his feet, then throws an elbow to Crystal's midsection. Crystal breaks the hold, and Hoff runs into the ropes, charging off with a big clothesline, but Crystal ducks! Hoff comes flying off the backside, and Crystal catches Hoff with a monkeyflip, sending the big man SOARING into the air! Hoff lands hard on his back, holding it in pain, as Crystal rolls backward with a flourish and gets to her feet! The fans boo, but louder than the fans is Drek Stone, who BEGS to be let into the ring. COLE Oh, sure, now he wants in! CABOOSE He's gonna make Hoff pay for even THINKING he might beat Drek. Crystal shrugs and tags Drek in, and the boos intensify as the World Champion gets into the ring. Drek wastes no time stomping Hoff back down, before the big man can get up. After a few vicious shots, Drek pounds his chest and raises his arm into the air, drawing the jeers of the house onto him. Drek soaks them in, almost reveling in the reaction he gets from the people. Drek turns back to Hoff, pulling Hoff up before drilling him with a forearm to the temple. Hoff reels, and Drek sends him off the ropes, catching him with a drop toe hold. Hoff grabs his nose, kicking his feet. Drek stops the motion with a well-timed stomp to the back of the head. Drek sizes Hoff up, then charges off of the ropes, coming back off with a snap elbow drop to the small of Hoff's back. Hoff's back arches in pain, and the big man lets out a scream. Drek gets back to his feet, measures, and drops ANOTHER elbow to Hoff's back. Drek turns Hoff over, and covers him....for two! COLE Not quite yet! CABOOSE Bah. Hoff kicks out, and Drek gets off of him. Drek stomps Hoff again, then pulls him back up and slaps on a side headlock. Hoff tries to break free, but the Champ drags him over to the corner, and tags in Crystal. The crowd boos as Crystal steps into the ring, and snaps a kick into Hoff's midsection. Drek lets go, and Robinson escorts him out of the ring. Crystal grabs Hoff by the arm and twists, wringing it and doubling Hoff over. Crystal rears back and snaps another kick off, catching Hoff in the shoulder. Hoff lands on his hands and knees, and Crystal grabs him by the arm and rolls him up in a La Magistral cradle! Robinson makes the count, but Hoff BARELY gets out at two! Crystal complains to Robinson, but the ref holds two fingers up! COLE Hoff could use a break. CABOOSE Hear that, Crystal? Break his arm! Hoff slowly gets to his feet, and Crystal fires him off the ropes again. Hoff comes off the other side, and Crystal leaps onto his shoulders, flinging him over with a hurricarana! Hoff flies across the ring and skids under the bottom strand, landing on the outside! Suddenly, Drek Stone sprints into the ring, drawing the attention of the official! Robinson restrains Drek, and Crystal heads to the outside! COLE Come on! What are they doing? Crystal kicks Hoff in the back of the head, then grabs a chair from ringside! Crystal heads around the ring...but Axel hops off the apron and stands in her way!! The fans go CRAZY as Axel stares Crystal down!! CRYSTAL "TRY TO STOP ME, ADAM! I DARE YOU!!" Crystal holds her hands out to the sides, shaking her head! Axel looks as Crystal....and simply turns away to HUGE crowd heat. COLE He can't do it. He just can't hurt Crystal! CABOOSE He can't hurt her...but she can sure hurt him!! As Axel turns away, Crystal rears back to hit him with the chair...but HOFF GRABS IT FROM BEHIND! Hoff stops the chair on the backswing, yanking it away from Crystal, and throwing it to the ground! Crystal turns around, and Hoff dazes her with a big right hand! The crowd pops as Hoff grabs Crystal's hair and throws her into the ring!! Hoff follows her in, while on the outside, Axel glares up at him! COLE Axel doesn't even want Hoff hitting Crystal! We wondered if they could coexist, but so far, they haven't even tagged! CABOOSE Meanwhile, Drek and Crystal are on the same page. COLE But Crystal could be in trouble here! Hoff picks Crystal up by her long blonde locks, and hooks her in a front face lock. Hoff lifts Crystal up, and drops her down with a vertical suplex! Hoff gets to his feet and pulls Crystal up, hooks her again, lifts her...and suplexes her to the mat! Hoff picks Crystal up once more, hooks her, and lifts her....holds her....HOLDS her in the air... COLE The power!! And finally, Hoff DROPS Crystal with a third vertical suplex! Hoff floats over into a cover, and Robinson counts one, two, three-NO!! Crystal pops her shoulder off the canvas! Hoff, unfazed, pull Crystal back up to her feet, whips her off the ropes, and catches her with a HUGE powerslam! The cover! ONE!! TWO!! THR-NO!!!! Crystal kicks out! COLE Hoff's got his power offense rolling! Crystal needs a tag! Hoff pulls Crystal back to her feet, and pats his bicep before whipping Crystal toward the ropes...but Hoff yanks her back, looking for the short-arm--NO! Crystal ducks, spinning behind Hoff and grabbing him around the waist! Before the big man can react, Crystal tosses him over with a HUGE release German suplex!! Both Crystal and Hoff lie on the mat!! COLE WHAT A MOVE!! Now somebody has to make the tag!! Both Hoff and Crystal start crawling, and Axel and Hoff reach in to make the tags! The crowd is chanting for Hoff and making as much noise as they can, but it's Drek that makes the tag first! Hoff lunges...but Drek grabs him by the ankle and pulls him away! The fans jeer as Drek yanks Hoff away, turning him onto his back! Drek spins around Hoff's legs, looking for the figure four...but Hoff kicks Drek in the rear, sending him into the ropes! Drek grabs the ropes, then turns around, charging at Hoff as he gets to his feet.... CABOOSE OH NO!! SPINEBUSTER~! Hoff DRILLS Drek with the spinebuster, then falls onto his back! Again, it's a race to tag! Both men are crawling...crawling.... COLE Who's gonna get the tag first?! CABOOSE And what happens if they BOTH make the tag?! Drek crawls, leaps, and slaps Crystal on the hand, making the tag! Crystal comes into the ring...and Hoff MAKES THE TAG TO AXEL!! The crowd gets to its feet as Axel looks at Crystal!! COLE Oh my God! What is going to happen here?! Crystal smirks...but the smile fades as Axel STEPS INTO THE RING!! Crystal looks around...and STEPS TOWARD AXEL!! CABOOSE He couldn't hit her!! He CAN'T!! Crystal takes another step toward Axel...and another....and another brings them nose to nose!! Axel looks down at Crystal, who DARES him to hit her....and AXEL LEAVES THE RING!! COLE WHAT?! The fans are LIVID as, with Hoff and Drek still out, Crystal looks on as Axel, his head lowered, walks down the ramp!! CABOOSE I can't believe it. As much as I ran down Axel, I really can't believe this. In the ring, Robinson counts, with no other option....eight....nine....ten!! Robinson calls for the bell!! *ding ding ding* "BOOOOOOOOO!!" The Fink announces the decision... FINKEL The winners of this match, as a result of a countout....DREK STONEand CRYSTAL!!!! The boos are deafening as "Plug In Baby" plays over the arena speakers, while Robinson has no choice but to raise Crystal's arm. On the ramp, Axel looks up, with a sad look on his face, as Drek gets to his feet as well! The referee holds both their arms into the air... *WHAM* And the fans go NUTS as Hoff blasts Drek from behind with a huge forearm!! Drek goes down, and Crystal turns around.....RIGHT INTO A SPINEBUSTER BY HOFF!! The fans go NUT as Crystal hits the mat! Drek gets back to his feet and swings at Hoff, but Hoff ducks it, and grabs Drek from behind!! CABOOSE NO!!! Hoff lifts Drek up....holds him....and DROPS HIM WITH THE FUTURE SHOCK!! The fans EXPLODE as Hoff drops Drek head first to the mat!! Hoff gets to his feet, and waits as Crystal gets to her feet...and the big man grabs her from behind!! COLE Drek has been laid out by Hoff, and now Crystal...HEY WAIT!! Hoff grabs Crystal in the reverse facelock, but gets BLINDSIDED by Axel who storms the ring!! Axel grabs Hoff from behind, lifts him up, and drops him with an AXEL SLAM!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE I can't believe it. Axel has laid out his own partner!! CABOOSE As well as the man he MAY have to face at Anglemania! Remember, Cole, it's every man for himself!! With Hoff, Drek, and Crystal laid out around him, Axel can only look to the sky. With tears in his eyes, Axel gives the crucifix pose, then drops his arms, walking out, a man triumphant, and a man defeated. Looking back at the carnage in the ring, looking at Crystal lying on the mat, it's all Axel can do to walk away. COLE What will Axel do at Anglemania if he can't fight? How will he survive? *fade to black*

The scene fades in from black to reveal Josie, sitting at her desk, looking right into the camera. JOSIE Welcome, HeldDown fans. Before we get the show started tonight, I have an announcement to make. Josie takes a deep breath. JOSIE Due to the actions at the conclusion of last week's episode, HeldDown superstar Chris Stevens has been temporarily taken out of action. A smal cheer is audible from the live crowd, who watches along on the AngleTron. Shockingly, a few boos are also audible. JOSIE Mr. Stevens will likely miss three to four months of in-ring action due to the injuries he suffered at the hands of Hoff. However... Josie pauses, letting the crowd cheer the mere mention of Hoff's name. JOSIE However, due to the personal nature of this rivalry, and due to Chris Stevens' past actions, I have decided not to impose any punishment on Hoff. Fans pop LOUD for that bit of news as Ms. Baker continues on. JOSIE Speaking of Hoff, he will be involved in our main event tonight, teaming with Axel... A blend of mostly cheers, some boos, for the Dark One's name... JOSIE To face Drek Stone and Crystal. LOUD boos for the Champ and the company's newest rulebreaker. JOSIE And with our main event set, let the Road to Anglemania continue! OAOAST HeldDOWN~! The opening video plays to the ROCKIN sounds of "LaLa" by Ashlee Simpson. Although the lyrics don't make much sense. Why the hell would I want to sing on the bathroom floor? I don't.....oh! I guess lala-ing actually means something else. What a perverted girl. What a logo! And what fireworks! Red! White! Blue! Yellow! Green! Well, no green. But still impressive nonetheless~!~! COLE Welcome, ladies and gentlemen! You have just tuned into OAOAST HeldDown, LIVE from San Antonio, Texas! COACH And we really do have a great show for you all! Promise? CABOOSE Do we really? COACH Well, not sure. I didn't look at the schedule yet. COLE We do have some beefy cowboys here though. Ol'Mikey's going to go window shopping, he is. CABOOSE Yeah. Well, what we DO know is that tonight, we're going to witness Drek Stone and Crystal put a major beating on their AngleMania opponents 17 days before AngleMania IV! COACH That's right everybody! Write it down! AngleMania IV. Live from Trump Plaza. April 3rd, 2005! COLE Yes! And the rest of the show tonight, I'm sure we'll have no problem just winging it. We could.... CABOOSE Hold up Michael, take a look at what's headed our way! A roar comes up from the crowd, as the camera pulls away from Sofa Central and takes us to the aisleway, where Zack Malibu is seen storming down to the ring! COLE No music, no grand entrance...Zack Malibu is walking with a purpose! Malibu climbs into the ring and immediately motions for the mic, wasting no time in getting what he wants. MALIBU I know I don't belong out here right now, but I wanted to get some things out in the open. Malibu pauses, and starts pacing the ring, looking down at the canvas. MALIBU I know what you're all thinking...I know what's racing through everyone's mind right now. You're all thinking 'here's Zack Malibu, the same guy who told us to screw for the last year, and he's going to apologize because he got his ass kicked by Black T. He's going to apologize because he has nobody, nothing left." Well I hate to let you down, but I am not going to do that. A mixed reaction comes from the crowd, but Zack continues on. MALIBU The honest truth is, I don't regret the path I chose. Sly Sommers is gone, Crystal had her ass handed to her, The Thrillogy is no more, all by MY choice. I did what I felt was needed at each and every one of those given times. I can't change the past, and I'm not going to try. I can't change what I did to any of you. I broke your kids hearts, I let you down as a hero...whatever the results were of my actions, they happened. The past is the past, except for one thing...there's one thing in the past that's killing me that I can't change, and that's what went down two weeks ago on this program. Tony...Dan Black...they...you know what? Roll the footage. COLE What's he doing? Nothing comes up on the Angletron. MALIBU PLAY THE FOOTAGE! PLAY IT! Again, nothing comes on. CWM then comes out from the back, jogging down to the ring and getting a pop upon his entrance into the arena. CWM rolls into the ring and tries to calm Zack down, but Zack keeps trying to move past him, and keeps shouting over the mic. MALIBU PLAY THE TAPE! CWM steals the mic from Zack. CWM Zack...Zack...RELAX. You don't have to do this. None of us, not the fans, not me, no one needs an explanation. If I had to explain everything I did in the past, it'd take the whole... Zack steals the mic back. MALIBU I don't CARE! I want them to show the footage! CWM You really want it? MALIBU Yes. CWM You REALLY want it? MALIBU YES! All of a sudden, the lights dim and all eyes are on the Angletron, as the clip from two weeks ago plays of Candie standing up to Black T, only to have her neck snapped by a Blackout. The lights come back up and CWM bows his head, as Malibu stares straight towards the Angletron, his eyes growing wider. MALIBU THAT. THAT RIGHT THERE. The one incident in the past I wish never happened. Because it's all MY fault. That girl...MY GIRL, is hurt, stuck in a neck brace, because of ME. Black T wanted to make themselves famous at MY expense, and that's all the Original Elite was, and then they decide that they've leeched off me as much as they can, and they want to put me out of my misery? I LIVE FOR MY MISERY! This misery...it's fuel. Dan, Tony, you two have accomplished something huge here. You have become the two men that I will do anything...ANYTHING to destroy. Zack stops, the emotion choking him up. In a surreal moment, CWM tries to console Zack, who stands fuming...and then even more so as he catches a glimpse of two well dressed familiar faces strolling out from the back. "Zack, Zack Zack." The crowd boos the arrival of Black T, dressed to the nines, as they stand on the entrance stage. TONY Malibu, get over it. You don't belong out here, so stop taking up precious TV time making idle threats. You think Black T was leeching off YOU? On the contrary. I think it was Zack Malibu leeching off Black T! More boos follow that statement, as CWM and Zack watch on. Zack tries to head out of the ring, but CWM pulls him back, stopping a fight. TONY Keep your dog on his leash, C Dub, I'm making a point here. Zack, it's a fact that you were halfway to hell career wise when we decided to align with you. You had lost to Crystal, Axel...you were treading water. You saw the greatest tag team in OAOAST history riding high, and you wanted a piece. So you approached us with the idea for TOE and we took it. Even Dan and I weren't stupid enough to refuse attatchment to the great Zack Malibu. The truth is, is that the Zack Malibu now is NOTHING like the Zack Malibu of yesteryear. There's no motivation, no fire, no desire. You've done everything Zack, and you seem content with that. What we did to you was a warning to get out while the getting was good. The attack on Candie, that was HER FAULT. SHE provoked US. It was something of a bonus, a final "screw you" to the man who might have made this company at one point, but has been doing nothing for the last twelve months but run it into the ground! Malibu is incensed, and continues to be held back by CWM, as Dan Black takes the mic. BLACK Zack, I know you're mad. You're oooooh so furious about what I did to your girlfriend, but that's nothing compared to what's in store for you. You see, when that strung out grunge goon standing next to you came out of nowhere last week, it made us realize how desperate you are. To agree to team with a man that you hate and hates you just as much, just to get your hands on us? It means you've lost sense, focus. It means that you're willing to do anything and everything to get your hands on us, and that's great, because desperate men make mistakes. The first one was your little challenge last week, about meeting us at Anglemania. You want the greatest alliance ever seen in the OAOAST to use their slots at our premiere event to take you and your partner, a man who doesn't even LIKE you, on? Zack nods yes, and CWM even turns to give attention to Black T for commenting on him. BLACK Well Black T humbly agrees, because what better stage to use as a showcase for the final match of one of the company's biggest stars? What better way to send the so called savior, the "Franchise" packing. WHAT BETTER WAY TO CEMENT THE STATUS OF BLACK T AS THE TRUE COMPANY ELITE? Zack, CWM, boys you want us that bad, you got it. Although...why wait? Zack immediately heads for the ropes, but CWM keeps his cool, pulling Zack back and knowing full well it could be nothing more than a set up. BLACK Next week we come out here in that ring, and make this official. The contracts will be drawn up, and we'll sign on the dotted line, adding our names to the Anglemania line up. Then, once the ink dries and the ring is cleared, why don't we four face off, unsanctioned of course? The crowd roars, and both CWM and Zack nod their heads. TONY Then there's nothing left to say, is there? Enjoy the little time you have left, because come Anglemania, we're going to do some company restructuring. With those final words, Black T disappear behind the curtain, leaving the infuriated Zack in the ring with his former blood rival turned partner, each one pondering what the future will bring for them, as we fade to commercial. *COMMERCIAL! BUY PACKETS OF AIR FOR A PREMIUM PRICE OF $2.99 PER BAG! Only at WalMart! WOW~!~!*

Backstage we see Josh Matthews, Master of The Mathillennium, standing in the OAOAST ACKSHUNzone. He’s wearing denim jeans and that stupid Anglemania Baseball jersey no one outside of this dumb ass company would wear. Joshie is drinking a can of Mountain Dew. He’s with Alix Spezia and Krista Isadora Duncan. Alix is wearing a ruffled black skirt and a blue shirt that reads, “Drop pants, not bombs.” Kris is wearing a stylish business suit. JOSH “J.MATH” MATTHEWS Ladies and gentlemen, I’m backstage with the tag team champions, Krista Isadora Duncan and Alix Spezia, my favorite tag team, Chicks Over Dicks. KRISTA Hey, Joshie, are you drinking Mountain Dew? JOSH Hell yeah, KID! Mountain Dew is the official drink of the OAOAST! All the stars are doing the Dew! ALIX That explains why you shower with your underwear on. You know Mountain Dew shrinks your balls, dude. JOSH What?!!! KRISTA Yeah. I started drinking that stuff when I was seventeen, when my name was Christopher Ian Duncan. (Josh spits the drink out, spraying the pee colored liquid all over the tiled floor.) KRISTA That’s okay, Joshie. It's not like you were going to get any pussy that wasn’t battery operated, anyway. ALIX That’s a mental image I did not need! JOSH Uh..if you don’t mind I’d like to get your thoughts on your opponents in your Anglemania tag team title match, The Global Party Exchange. ALIX Josh, you can call us Toucan Sam, because we’re going to run Fruity Loops around The Global Partaaaay Exchange at Anglemania. KRISTA Let’s talk about their entrance first. Fans, you can go to the bathroom, get something to drink, give birth, conceive a child, give birth, conceive another child, have an abortion because you think the child in your stomach is the demon spawn of Satan, do your taxes, write a dissertation, become a crackhead, go into rehab, write a best selling novel, get out of rehab, have another child, and you’d still be done before GPX got finished with their entrance. ALIX I remember a show before Angleslam they were facing Black T for the tag team titles. And they skate boarded down to the ring. Which is such a poser thing to do, because they didn’t even know how to skateboard. A skating pro had to come in and spend all day with them to teach them how to skate. Anyway that entrance was so long that when it started I was twenty five, when it was done I was eligible for social security! JOSH Well, Global Party Exchange.... ALIX Have you gotten a look at Scotty boy’s tight’s lately? His name is written on the back! Dude, why the hell do you have your name written on your ass? Like, you’re gonna forget? He walks up to somebody “Hey everybody! I’m..uh..uh..um..Leon Rodez?” He checks his BUTT. “No, I’m Scotty Static! Hooray! I know my name! Good for me!” He needs something more fitting then his name back there. KRISTA Like, Johnny: Insert tongue here. JOSH Alix, we have something important to address. ALIX If this is about the company softball game, I don’t wanna hear it! If you want someone to blame, go after Little Miss “I’m going to sit out in centerfield all day and pick my ass and let fly balls drop right in front of me because I have the brain size of an amoeba” Crystal. Or how about going after Drek “Screw filling the bases, I’m going to hit a homerun every time I get up to bat, wether you punks like or not. And by homerun I mean flying out to second.” Stone. It's not my fault we lost! JOSH Actually I wanted to talk about something else. Last week you all competed in a match many observers are calling the televised match of the year. KRISTA Yeah, the year’s only had three months. JOSH Regardless the match featured a lot of confusion at the end, with Alix hitting Johnny Jam Jackson in the face with a tennis racket. Alix, did you hit Johnny on purpose? ALIX Heaven’s no! Joshua, if I hit Johnny on purpose he wouldn’t even have a face right now. He’d have a BUTT. He’d have an ass instead of a face. He would’ve shown up the doctor’s with like his nose hanging off his ear, and his right eye on his cheek and he would’ve been all “Hey, Doc! Alix Spezia just did her best Serena Williams impression on my face! Is there anything you can do for me!” And the doc would say “I don’t think typical medicine would help you. Here, I have this spare BUTT lying around. Why don’t we just glue it to your face and I think it’ll be fitting because all that comes out of your mouth is...” JOSH Shit? ALIX Your words, Joshua. JOSH Indeed they were. ALIX Now, I understand that Johnny Jackson’s mommy, Miss Jackson, was in distress watching her son get leveled with a tennis racket. And I feel really bad about that so I just wanted to say a little something to her. Clear the air if you don’t mind. Joshua, kick me a beat! Josh morphs into a beatbox, giving Alix a little bass to work with. ALIX Yeah this one right here goes out to all the baby's mamas, mamas...mama’s mamas, baby mama’s mamas. Yeah, go like this...I'm sorry Miss Jackson JOSH OOOOH! ALIX (singing) I am for real. Neva meant to make your Johnny cry. I apologize a trillion times. I'm sorry Ms. Jackson JOSH OOOOH! ALIX (singing) Neva meant to make your Johnny cry I apologize a trillion times. ALIX (singing) Ms. Jackson my intentions were good I wish I could become a magician to abracadabra all the sadder thoughts of me thoughts of she thoughts of he askin what happened to the feelin that he and me...had, I pray so much about it need some knee..pads. It happened for a reason one can't be.....mad. So know this, know that everything is cool and yes I will be present on the first day of school, and graduashaun. Josh, let her know that her grandchild is a baby, not a paycheck. JOSH (singing) I’m sorry Miss Jackson, OOOH! Never meant to make your Johnny cry I apologized a trillion times. ALIX (Pointing at an embarrassed Krista) Hit ‘em up, homegirl! KRISTA Absolutely not. ALIX (rapping. And not very well) Okay. Uh, uh, yeah "Look at the way she treats me," shit, look at the way you treat me See, Johnny, you and your nosey ass homeboy got ya ass sent up the creek G without a paddle, you left the straddlin, ride this thing on out And you and your girl aint speakin no more cuz my ***** all in her mouth . Know wut I'm talkin’ about, jealousy, infidelity, envy. Cheating-beating, and to the D-n-the G they be the same thing. So who you placing the blame on? You keep on singing that same song Let bygones be bygones, you can go on and get the hell on, you and yo mama. Alix takes a bow. JOSH Alix 3000, every body. ALIX Badd Boy, baby. 2005. Please believe it! We cut away from the always-entertaining Alix promo to the sometimes-entertaining trio of Cole, Coach, and Caboose. *The lights dim and are replaced by colored strobes. KC & The Sunshine Band hits the arena’s speakers and the fans boo knowing all too well whose about to make their way out.* Cole: The 70s Dude is about to make his way out shortly and he’ll be in action against Leon Rodez on our road to Anglemania! Caboose: Its about time that our savior from the 70s gets a shot at some OAOAST gold too. I’d have to say that while Rodez has had a nice ride, it all ends tonight. Coach: The 70s Dude couldn’t even beat Calvin Szechstein at Zero Hour. What makes you think he’s got a shot against the man holding the X, Boose? *before Caboose can answer Gary Capelleta cuts him off* Gary: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will be for the OAOAST X-Division Championship! Making his way from Newark, New Jersey; he is…The 70s Dude! *The 70s Dude makes his way out from the back and soaks in the jeers as if they were even more soothing than the music he chooses to come out to. After a moment he stands there and begins doing The Hustle~ just to egg the crowd on further. To his surprise the fans start to cheer but he soon realizes why as he feels a large thud on the small of his back sending him stumbling forward and falling to his knees.* Cole: Its Szechstein! Calvin Szechstein just unloaded on The 70s Dude with a chair! *The Dude wearily and left to one knee turns his head and as he does so Calvin brings the chair down hard onto the cranium of The Dude rattling his hippy brains* Caboose: Get security out here! Calvin is out of control! Coach: You would be too Boose if you were attacked and laid out in the back with a chair. Caboose: Did you see The 70s Dude do that? Calvin is just assuming that The 70s Dude did it, and you know what they say happens when you assume things… Cole: You make an ass out of you and Uma Thurman? *Caboose and Coach look at Michael Cole as if he’s from Mars while the brawl at the entry way continues. Calvin having thrown down the chair and letting the wave of cheers direct him further goes to bring The 70s Dude up by his hair. The Dude however in a last ditch effort gives Calvin a quick low blow causing Calvin to let go and stumble back. The 70s Dude seizes the opportunity to crawl away and over the guard rail in front of a man holding up a large sign that says “Mountain Dew Sux”. Calvin regains himself, grabs the chair once more and in a desperate attempt swings for The 70s Dude narrowly missing the man with the sign.* Coach: Even I have to agree that this is outta control now. *Just then security lead by Carl Winslow grab Calvin and restrain him while The Dude(being protected by the arena’s normal security from hostile fans) makes his way out of there via the crowd.* Cole: This match isn’t going to take place and we need to restore order. We’ll be back fans! *the cameras fade to commercial as security continues their attempt to drag an extremely furious Calvin Szechstein to the back.* (Commercial) I love the Tender-crisp Chicken Bacon Cheddar Ranch… (Back from Commercial) *cameras take us to the back where security is forcing Calvin Szechstein to leave the building after his vicious assault on The 70s Dude. Josie watches on from a distance shaking her head in shock and disbelief.* COLE This is just crazy! Let's go to a promo or something.... VOICE OVER The following is an above average Anglemania moment brought to you by OAOAST Assault The Album: Music to come out of the closet to The newest OAOAST CD, featuring the entrance themes of all your favorite OAOAST superstars! OAOAST Anglemania II Anglemania IV The dream continues April 3rd

Ominous music plays as a steel cage is shown in black and white. CREEPY VOICE ANNOUNCER It is 16 feet tall. The camera does a zoom on a part of the cage. C.V.A. 20 feet wide. The camera does a pan of the cage as the ominous music continues playing. C.V.A. It is made of cold, hard, unforgiving steel. The camera does a 360 on the cage. C.V.A. Once you get in. The music stops. Panther is shown inside the cage. PANTHER YOU CAN’T GET OUT! Classical music plays over footage of Tha Puerto Rican/Panther feud. The chairshot that started it all. The brawl backstage. The riot at Zero Hour. This is shown in color. In between the clips, are shots of Tha Puerto Rican and Panther inside the steel cage, screaming and making angry faces. This is shown in black and white. CREEPY VOICE ANNOUNCER On April 3rd, two men will be locked inside an unforgiving structure. THA PUERTO RICAN THERE WILL BE BLOODSHED! PANTHER THERE WILL BE PAIN! PRL THERE WILL BE NOWHERE TO RUN! PANTHER THERE WILL BE NO MERCY! C.V.A. On April 3rd, a blood feud will end. PRL I WILL END YOUR CAREER! PANTHER I WILL CRIPPLE YOU! PRL YOU WILL KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU PISS OFF THA PUERTO RICAN! PANTHER YOU WILL PAY FOR WHAT YOU’VE DONE TO ME! CREEPY VOICE ANNOUNCER On April 3rd, there will be… PRL RAGE PANTHER IN PRL THE PRL & PANTHER CAGE!!! The camera shows Tha Puerto Rican in a Steel Cage posing. CREEPY VOICE ANNOUNCER “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican. The camera shows Panther in a Steel Cage posing. CREEPY VOICE ANNOUNCER Panther. The steel cage is shown again. CREEPY VOICE ANNOUNCER RAGE IN THE CAGE! PRL PANTHER WILL BE BEATEN LIKE HE’S NEVER BEEN BEATEN BEFORE! PANTHER THA PUERTO RICAN WILL BE TAKEN OUT OF WRESTLING FOR GOOD, AND THAT’S THE DAMN TRUTH! Tha Puerto Rican and Panther are shown in the steel cage in between clips of their feud as the classical music continues playing. The OAOAST AngleMania IV logo is shown on screen along with ordering information. After this, the classical music ends. CREEPY VOICE ANNOUNCER “RAGE IN THE CAGE: PR/PANTHER II” AT OAOAST ANGLEMANIA IV: THE CLASSIEST ANGLEMANIA EVER! SUNDAY, APRIL 3RD AT 7:00 P.M. LIVE ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW! CALL YOUR LOCAL CABLE OR SATELITE COMPANY TO ORDER NOW! THA PUERTO RICAN THE CHAMP HAS SPO-KUN~!!! (Fade Out) COACH INTENSE~!~! COLE To keep this show running along, we have Drek Stone waiting in the back right now. CABOOSE DA CHAMP IS HERE! COLE Let's get to it. JOSH Drek Stone, we all know about the huge Double Header you’re going to be facing come AngleMania. But I wanted to ask you…. DREK Oh, please. Get the hell out of here. With surprising swiftness, Drek yanks the microphone out of Josh’s hand and boots him in the ass, sending the announcer flailing out of the camera’s reach. DREK Please, Josh, I have this handled. OAOAST Heavyweight Champion and you think I need you to question me. Stick to the Global Party Xchanges of the world. I know how to take care of myself. Now, folks, I am going to make this short and sweet. DREK I’ve heard the whispers. Believe me, I know what everybody is saying. Absolutely nobody thinks I am going to be able to walk out of AngleMania with the title around my waist. They thought Hoff gave me enough trouble by himself. Some actually had the audacity to think I wouldn’t have beaten Hoff in that ring if it wasn’t for Axel. That he had my number. That he knew the exact strategy needed to beat me. But let’s just say I do prove my talent and get past Hoff. What happens then? Why, there’s no way I’ll be able to beat Axel. He has the height advantage on me. He has the weight advantage. The reach advantage. He has that oh-so-intimidating entrance with the fog lights. I can’t beat both those men in the same night! Drek shifts the title over to his other shoulder, getting increasingly more agitated as he speaks. DREK Have you people learned absolutely nothing? I’ve overcome the odds every single time all of you thought I was finished. Need I remind you of my record against these two? Hoff is now 0-2 against me! I beat him on HeldDown within my first few weeks with the OAOAST! And I beat him by disqualification -- but rest assured, it should have been submission -- at Zero Hour. As for Axel, don’t any of you forget that I was the one that got the pin on him in the Elimination Chamber. I was the one to eliminate him en route to the Heavyweight Tite. I did it once. And I guarantee I could do it again. I am going to prove to all you naysayers ONCE MORE that I’m the sole elite superstar in this business. Josie could throw anyone in my way she wants to try to pry this title away from me. It won’t work. It never works! But let’s just say I don’t….. The Heavyweight Champion eagerly urges the camera to come a little closer. DREK If I don’t retain the Heavyweight Title at AngleMania? If I can’t manage to beat Hoff and Axel in the same night? If I don’t walk out of Trump Plaza STILL the Heavyweight Champion of the world? Drek clears his throat slightly before finishing. DREK Then none of you will see Drek Stone step foot into the OAOAST ever again. I will voluntarily END my career at AngleMania IV if I can’t beat Hoff and Axel. I would have failed like I never failed before, and I refuse to stay in this federation as a SHELL of my former self. I’m not like the other wrestlers around here. I will not accept failure. For me, it’s success the entire way or there will simply be no way at all. I’m throwing the damn gauntlet down now. Drek Stone calms himself down and rubs his hand through his hair for a moment. DREK Tonight, Crystal and I are going to give Axel and Hoff a sneak peek of AngleMania. It’s going to be a glimpse of the future, if you will. I’ll beat the hell out of Hoff. Crystal will beat the hell out of Axel. I’ll beat the hell out of Axel. And we’ll both walk out of the ring together, victorious. Just as we will both walk out of our respective matches victorious at AngleMania IV. DREK Hoff. Axel. Failure is no longer an option for me. If you want to pry this title away from me at AngleMania IV, you are going to have to BEAT me like I’ve never been beaten before. Because I am not ready to give up my title. I am not ready to give up my career. And I will do both if EITHER of you two scumbags take the title away from me at AngleMania! With those two final words, Drek simply tosses the microphone off to the side and walks away from the camera. DREK As if I needed Josh to interview me. There’s not a better promo man in the business. The camera slowly fades away to commercial, with simply the words of Caboose being heard in the distance. CABOOSE OH. MY. GOD. *COMMERCIAL* EVERYONE SHOULD HAND IN THEIR ANGLEMANIA IV COMMENTS TO NYU NOW! *END OF COMMERCIAL* COLE ….what an odd advertisement. COACH Agreed. OAOAST Top Contender AngleMania Showcase AXEL AngleMania III CUE: ‘The Game’ by Disturbed’ Tell me exactly what am I supposed to do? Now that I have allowed you TO BEAT ME Do you think that we could play another game? Maybe I could win this time! I kinda like the misery you put me through Darling you can trust me COMPLETELY If you even try to look the other way I think that I could KILL this time… BOOM!BOOM!BOOBOOBOOMMMBOOOMBOOMMMM!!!!!!!! The pyro goes off but the arena stays in darkness, except fro one red spotlight at the top of the stage, with a silhouette of a man doing the crucifix pose. The lights go up to reveal Axel, 24/7 Belt around his waist, as the man, and more pyro goes off around the arena. Axel walks down the ramp, and doesn’t take his eyes off Crystal. ><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>< Axel starts to get up quicker now, as Crystal prepares for a second Double Jump Moonsault. Axel gets to his feet, his face a crimson mask, and goes over to Crystal, who has her back to him! CABOOSE Uh-oh Coach, your girl is gone now. Axel grabs Crystal by the hair, and lifts her onto his shoulders, off the turnbuckles, ready for an Axel Slam! COLE Axel’s got her up for an Axel Slam! If he hits this, this match is over! Axel turns around for the whole crowd to see, and then he rotates Crystal over, dropping her neck first for an Axel Slam!!! The impact causes Crystal to fly halfway across the ring, almost sliding to the outside! ><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>< Axel looks down at Crystal, a look of pure shock on his face. He stands up and wipes the blood from his face, before looking back at Crystal. His expression of shock turns to one of anger, and then hatred. He walks over to Crystal, and lifts her dead-weight body up to its feet. COLE Oh man, Crystal is lifeless. Just give up Crystal, just live to fight another day! Axel grabs Crystal and puts her on his shoulders, in a Samoan Drop position this time. CABOOSE What’s he going to go for now? Axel gets Crystal onto his shoulders, and drops her headfirst for a DEATH VALLEY DRIVER! COLE Oh a devastating Death Valley Driver, Crystal’s head bounced off the canvas! CABOOSE Axel is just dominating her here! COACH I’m impressed. OAOAST Top Contender AngleMania Showcase

*Fade in to a bland looking office. An old looking person in a suit sits at a desk. As the camera shot pans out, we can see Leon Rodez sitting on the other side of the desk, feet propped on the desk leg.* BUSINESS MAN So, Mr Rodez, you have been with this company now for two years. *Rodez nods.* BUSINESS MAN And you have been a loyal employee. *Rodez smirks, nodding again.* BUSINESS MAN But Mr Rodez, your conduct as of late has brought great shame on this great company. RODEZ Uhm...I'm sorry? BUSINESS MAN Mr Rodez, I'm afraid pleading innocence is not an option here. The facts before me are very clear. *The business man raises his glasses above the bridge of his nose, looking down at a sheet of paper.* BUSINESS MAN You have cut numerous threatening speeches on fellow co-workers. *Rodez shrugs* BUSINESS MAN Your liberal use of the words 'ass', 'hell' and 'damn' make a mockery of our friendly company ethics. *Again Rodez shrugs. Meanwhile, the old business man's eyebrows lift a notch.* BUSINESS MAN You made relations with a female co-worker... RODEZ Three, actually. BUSINESS MAN ...three female co-workers. And recorded it. *Rodez smirks.* RODEZ Yeah. I guess I should have asked first. BUSINESS MAN And distrubuted video cassettes to fellow co-workers, of the act. RODEZ Hey, they got a cut of the proceeds. BUSINESS MAN You performed a 'four hundred and fifty degree splash' of of the photocopier, onto our tea boy. RODEZ Well the guy gave me three sugars and I only asked for two. BUSINESS MAN And yet, despite all your wrong-doings, all your you sit here before me asking for a raise in pay!?! *The business man shakes his head.* BUSINESS MAN Mr Rodez, I don't know of a company in this land that would allow this sort of behaviour, let alone reward it. *Rodez smiles.* RODEZ Then you're watching the wrong channel Thursday nights. Live from Trump Plaza Hotel and Casino... ANGLEMANIA IV!! Anglemania Goes Corporate!! *Cut back to the office.* BUSINESS MAN I'm sorry Mr Rodez, but I have no other choice... *Rodez feigns fear while rummaging in his pockets.* BUSINESS MAN YOU'RE FIIIRRRREEE...ARRRGGGHHH!! *The business man is cut off though, by the immortal POWDER TO THE EYES~! Collapsing over his chair theatrically, the business man's legs flop into and then out of view, leaving Rodez smirking away.* RODEZ Damn, that never gets old. ----------------- COLE Ha ha! That Leon Rodez! He's all about just having fun! CABOOSE Ugh, I hate when you say that. COLE This handicap match has turned into a two-on-one affair! CABOOSE That too. A lightning bolt hits the entrance. The crowd pops than boos as "No Chance In Hell" starts up and smoke fills the entranceway. The crowd begins booing as a Mexican flag is shown on the AngleTron waving proudly. *No Chance (No Chance) That’s what ya got (Ha Ha Yeah) Put up against no machine too strong (Too strong) Pussy politicians buying souls for us are…PUPPETS! (PUPPETS!) Through the smoke, comes the 7 feet Mr. Boricua. Mr. Boricua looks at the crowd with a sneer and grunts as he heads to the ring. *DING DING DING* MICHAEL BUFFER Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall with a one hour T.V. time limit. Introducing first, making his way to the ring. From Tijuana, Mexico, weighing in at 300 lbs. He is the Official Bodyguard For The Lightning Crew, MR. BORRIIICCCUUUAAAAAAAAA!!! COLE Well fans, coming up next is a match that I’m sure isn’t going to be no technical masterpiece. Mr. Boricua, PRL’s bodyguard, will take on the man who Tha Puerto Rican will face April 3rd at AngleMania IV, Panther. CABOOSE It makes perfect sense why PRL would want Mr. Boricua to fight Panther 3 weeks before “Rage In The Cage”. PR wants Boricua to soften up Panther, so that he can go for the kill on April 3rd! Mr. Boricua jaws with fans and climbs over the top rope and enters the ring as “No Chance In Hell” continues to play. A spotlight shines on Mr. Boricua as he raises his arms in the air. He poses in the turnbuckle and heads to the outside to jaw with fans. “No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Boyds ends. COLE Panther certainly has a tough hill to climb tonight. This is what you would call a “David Vs. Goliath” matchup. CABOOSE But this time, Goliath wins! "Roc U" by the Young Gunz and Beanie Sigel kicks in over the PA system and the video feed suddenly cuts out to a black and red radar screen, at the center of which, a glowing red Panther's head appears after each sonar revolution. After the seventh revolution, the radar fades away, leaving just the glowing Panther's head. All at once, the head zooms forward, and… BOOOOOOOOOOOOM~! …we're taken back out to the darkened arena, which is rocked by a HUUUUUUUUUUGE pyro blast. A thick cloud of smoke forms at the entrance, and a bright white spotlight emits from the locker room, highlighting Panther's sihouette. The light steadily gets brighter as the cymbals begin to clash in the background, each clash accompanied by a bright red spotlight that highlights a portion of the entrance set. Finally, at approximately the 23-second mark, the white light begins to flicker and suddenly disappears as the flashing red spotlights converge on the entrance and Panther steps through the smoke. He heads out to the edge of the stage, taking a moment to take in the crowd's reaction. Then, he slowly raises his arms into the air, holding them high above his head momentarily before snapping them down by his side, at which point the red lights disperse about the arena and he starts down the ramp to the ring. BUFFER And his opponent, from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Weighing in at 197 lbs. He is the self-proclaimed “Champ Of Champs” He….Is….PAAAANNNTTHHHHEERRRRRRR!!!! COLE Last week, Panther and Tha Puerto Rican were barred from the building to prevent them from having their AngleMania IV match early. Panther will have a hard time in this match up. He is two feet smaller than Mr. Boricua, and it will certainly be hard for the 197 lb Panther to lift the 300 lb Boricua up for Da Bomb. CABOOSE This is going to be a slaughter. And I will most definitely enjoy it! COACH You have a sick mind you know that? CABOOSE Yes. COACH Oh. I have nothing to respond to that. Once at ringside, Panther hops upon the apron, pausing momentarily, leaning up against the top rope as a string of camera flashes light up the arena. He chuckles to himself as he looks to his left, then his right before stepping through the ropes and heading out to the center of the ring. There, he turns and takes stance in front of the main camera as, on cue, the ring goes dark, and four white spotlights begin to roam the crowd, getting brighter…and brighter…and brighter before converging on the center of the ring, where Panther snaps his right fist into the air, signaling for more pyro to explode from the ring posts. The flashing red and white spotlights return as Panther climbs the ropes and begins to play to the crowd. Panther gets off the ropes and stands in front of a turnbuckle. Mr. Boricua is at the opposite turnbuckle. Referee Charles Robinson checks both Panther and Mr. Boricua, and then calls for the bell. *DING DING DING* MR. BORICUA VS. PANTHER Mr. Boricua stares at Panther. He walks towards him, and screams right in his face. Panther screams back, causing the crowd to pop. CABOOSE Ha! He thinks he scares Mr. Boricua. Give me a break! Mr. Boricua spits at Panther, and then charges at him. Panther ducks, and starts punching Mr. Boricua with lefts and rights. The crowd cheers loudly as Panther causes the big man to become dizzy. Boricua rests on the ropes, so Panther rushes towards him, but Boricua answers with a BRUTAL clothesline that sends Panther down. COLE OH MY! You felt that all over the arena! COACH Panther’s head almost went right off with that move! CABOOSE There you go Boricua! Hit him with all your power! Soften him up for your boss for AngleMania! Mr. Boricua laughs at Panther and then drops an elbow on him. Boricua gets up and grabs Panther’s right arm, and drops his knees on it. Mr. Boricua then does the same move again. Panther screams in pain while the crowd boos and chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” Boricua yells at the crowd, and then picks up Panther. Mr. Boricua lifts Panther up. Bodyslam onto the mat. Mr. Boricua picks Panther up again, and gives him a second bodyslam. Boricua then heads to the ropes and then a legdrop onto Panther. COLE Mr. Boricua is controlling the pace in this match, fighting Panther in a methodical pace. He is slowly picking Panther apart; making sure Panther isn’t 100% come AngleMania IV. Mr. Boricua chokes Panther. Referee Charles Robinson wants Boricua to let go, so he does. Panther clutches his throat, as Boricua picks him up again. He Irish whips Panther into a corner. He follows with an avalanche. Mr. Boricua Irish whips Panther into the opposite turnbuckles, and goes for the avalanche again, but Panther moves out of the way. Panther starts railing into Mr. Boricua, punching him as much as he can. COLE Now, Mr. Boricua is getting some punishment. Panther is hitting the big man with all he has, but he still hasn’t fallen. Panther goes for the Panther Cutter, but Mr. Boricua slips out of it. Panther heads to the ropes, but Mr. Boricua hits him with a big boot. Mr. Boricua raises his arms in the air, drawing loud boos from the crowd. “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” COLE This match is all Mr. Boricua so far. Panther tried to fight back, but Boricua was too much. COACH I’m sure Tha Puerto Rican is watching this in the back, and he is very pleased with the work Mr. Boricua is doing to Panther. CABOOSE Oh you bet he is. The 7 feet 300 lb giant is just destroying that little weakling. Panther is no match for Boricua. He shouldn’t even try to fight him. It’s a no contest! Mr. Boricua yells at the crowd. He picks up Panther, and puts him in a bearhug. The crowd is cheering, trying to bring Panther back to life, but Mr. Boricua is squeezing Panther, taking the life out of him. The crowd begins chanting, “PAN-THER! PAN-THER! PAN-THER! PAN-THER!” Panther is slowly starting to fade, with Mr. Boricua cinching the hold tighter. COLE This could be it for Panther! Charles Robinson raises Panther’s left arm. It falls. Robinson raises the arm again. It falls a second time. He raises it a third time, but the arm doesn’t fall, and Panther starts showing signs of life. The crowd cheers louder and louder, Panther trying to escape the bearhug. He punches Mr. Boricua in the face. He does it again. Finally, Panther bites Mr. Boricua’s nose, and Boricua lets go of the bearhug. CABOOSE Hey no fair! Panther cheated! He bit Mr. Boricua’s nose! There’s no biting in wrestling! COLE I’m sure there’s nothing in the rulebooks regarding biting being illegal. CABOOSE Well, there should be. Panther heads to the ropes, and hits the Frontline. Mr. Boricua doesn’t fall. He goes for the Frontline again, but Boricua still doesn’t fall. Panther tries to bodyslam Mr. Boricua, but can’t. He heads to the ropes, but Mr. Boricua catches him with a SPIINNEEEBBUUSSSTTEEERRRR!!! COACH DAY-UM~! COLE What a spinebuster from Mr. Boricua! CABOOSE And with that, Panther is DONE. Mr. Boricua should just go for the pin right now. And indeed Mr. Boricua goes for the pin. 1… 2… Mr. Boricua picks Panther up. The crowd boos loudly. COLE Now come on! That could have been it. What a jerk that Mr. Boricua is. CABOOSE Hey, he’s 7-feet-300 lbs. He can do anything he damn well pleases as far as I’m concerned. Mr. Boricua chokes Panther. Referee Charles Robinson orders Boricua to stop, but Boricua yells at him, and Charles Robinson pees his pants. Mr. Boricua picks Panther up and whips him into the ropes, and follows with a flying clothesline. Mr. B then heads to the ropes, and goes for a splash, but Panther knees him in the stomach. Panther gets up, and punches Mr. B in the face several times. He then heads to the ropes and hits the Frontline, and this time Mr. B falls. The Champ Of Champs follows this up with an Asai Moonsault. Panther goes for the cover. Mr. Boricua gets out of the cover by lifting Panther up, dropping him onto Charles Robinson, knocking him out. COACH Leon Rodez was right. These refs sure do fall down easily! Panther goes to check on the ref, while the crowd turns their attention to the entranceway. They start booing, with Panther not noticing that “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican is heading to the ring in street clothes, carrying the chair with the panther’s head on it. COLE What a surprise. It’s Tha Puerto Rican. And once again, he has a chair. Also not surprising. CABOOSE Tha Puerto Rican is just going down there for moral support. He has no plans whatsoever to do anything devious to Panther. COACH Oh come on! PRL ain’t no angel. He’s more like a devil, actually. PRL enters the ring, the crowd booing like mad. PRL sizes up Panther with the anti-Panther chair in his hands, an evil grin on his face. Panther has his back turned, checking on the ref, while Mr. Boricua is getting up, laughing. The crowd tries to warn Panther of PRL’s arrival, but he is still trying to wake up the referee. PRL slams the chair on the mat, and then gets ready to swing it. CABOOSE Batter up! Panther hears the sound of the chair slamming the mat, and slowly turns around. PRL swings…. Panther ducks…. *WHAM!* AND MR. BORICUA GETS HIT IN THE HEAD WITH THE CHAIR! The crowd explodes. PRL says he’s sorry to Mr. Boricua a thousand times. Panther turns PRL around and gives him a lowblow. Tha Puerto Rican holds onto his Corporate Jewels and falls out of the ring. CABOOSE What a disgrace! WHAT A LOW LIFE PANTHER IS! How dare he hit Mr. Boricua with that chair! How dare he?! With Mr. Boricua still on the mat, Panther heads to the top ropes…and hits a frogsplash. Panther heads to the top again, and hits a second frogsplash. Tha Puerto Rican is clutching his buffalo shot on the floor; Charles Robinson is still knocked out; And Mr. Boricua is lying on the mat, holding his head. The crowd is cheering loudly. Panther looks at the crowd, and lets out a roar. COACH HE’S FIRED UP, DAMNIT! Panther picks up Mr. Boricua and goes behind him. He tries to lift him up for a German Suplex. But Boricua is just too damn big. Panther tries lifting him up again. Again, nothing. He goes for a third time, but this time, Mr. B turns around, and clutches Panther’s neck. The crowd gasps. CABOOSE HERE WE GO! CHOKESLAM! CHOKESLAM! COLE Mr. Boricua has Panther in a chokeslam position! He looks about ready to finish this match once and for all! CABOOSE This will soften up Panther for AngleMania for sure! Mr. Boricua jaws with the fans, Panther still in the goozle. Boricua laughs at Panther. He walks with Panther still in the goozle to the turnbuckle. He places Panther on the top rope, with the crowd booing louder and louder. COLE It looks like he is going for a super chokeslam. CABOOSE I guarantee this is the end for Panther! Right here! Here we go! PRL will have it easy at AngleMania now! Mr. Boricua does one more laugh, and pulls Panther off the top rope, preparing to give him a chokeslam from the top rope. However, in mid-air, Panther grabs Boricua’s head in a ¾ facelock…. and executes the PANTHER CUTTER! COLE OH MY! CABOOSE NO!!! The crowd explodes with cheers. Panther covers Mr. Boricua. Charles Robinson finally wakes up, and slowly counts. 1… 2… 3!!! *DING DING DING* (4:41) BUFFER The winner of this match….PAAAANNNTTTHHHEEERRRRR!!! “Rock U” by Young Gunz and Beanie Siegel plays with the crowd roaring. Panther raises his arms in the air, celebrating his surprise victory. PRL looks on from the ring apron with a shock look on his face. COLE What an incredible move by Panther! A Panther Cutter in mid-air! That was the most incredible reversal I’ve ever seen! That definitely deserves to be called one of the best moves of 2005! COACH What a way to win this match! Panther showed his intelligence and ring experience right there. He turned a chokeslam from the top rope into a Panther Cutter and won the match! That certainly surprised Mr. Boricua, it surprised us, and it surprised these fans! CABOOSE NO! NO! NO! How could this be?! How could this even be possible? Panther was supposed to be demolished by Mr. Boricua! He was supposed to be destroyed! It’s not fair! It’s just not fair! COLE Mr. Boricua went into this match with the mission to soften Panther up for the Steel Cage Match at AngleMania IV. However, it was Panther who came out on top, so I guess we can say that Panther is on fire as we inch closer and closer to “Rage In The Cage: PR/Panther II”! Panther plays to the crowd, until he sees PRL on the outside. The two men stare at each other, hate in their eyes. Panther dares PRL to enter the ring. He even does the “Just Bring It!” hand gesture. PRL mouths off, slowly backing away from the ring, holding the steel chair in his left hand, and his special area in his right. PRL threatens to run into the ring, but changes his mind at the last second, and goes back to holding his no-no place. COLE Tha Puerto Rican wants none of Panther tonight! Even though he came into the ring with a steel chair, when Panther’s back was turned! CABOOSE I think he just wants to rest after that brutal attack by Panther. Did you see what he did? He attacked the Corporate Jewels! He’s trying to prevent any little PRL’s from popping out of Lindsay! He’s a baby killer! He’s the Gene Snistky of the OAOAST! COACH Ouch! You must really hate Panther to make that comparison, huh? CABOOSE Ya damn right I do! PRL eyes Panther from the entrance. He raises the anti-Panther chair, and then says some obscenities in Spanish. He does the “Up Yours!” gesture before leaving through the entrance. Panther is still in the ring, the only one there, since Mr. Boricua has left also. He plays to the crowd some more, “Rock U” still blasting over the P.A. Systems. COLE We are just three weeks away from Tha Puerto Rican vs. Panther in a Steel Cage! It is one of the most anticipated matches of AngleMania IV. COACH Panther came out the victor tonight, but will he be the winner 3 weeks from now at the Trump Plaza Hotel And Convention Center in Atlantic City, New Jersey? COLE We’ll just have to wait and see! “Rage In The Cage: PR/Panther II” Sunday, April 3rd at OAOAST AngleMania IV! Panther is still in the ring, with “Rock U” by Young Gunz and Beanie Sigel playing. COLE Hey guys, I think Tony Schiavone has something to say. COACH WHO?! Standing in front of a OAOAST banner, Tony Schiavone, dressed in a blue blazer and denim jeans, has a microphone in one hand, an index card in the other. SCHIAVONE We'll return to the great action on HeldDOWN~! momentarily, but first some late breaking news concerning AngleMania IV. Moments ago I was handed a note from the offices of HeldDOWN~! General Manager Joise Baker with the signing of a "Game, Set, Match" for AM IV pitting Tiffany Ruutu and Logan Mann, formerly known as The Saints, versus the New New Midnight Express. A "Game, Set Match" means there will be two tennis rackets placed in the corner of both teams; grab the racket and you can use it throughout the match. In addition to th-- CORNETTE (Off Screen) Now you wait just a doggone minute, Tony Schiavone. SCHIAVONE Jim Cornette! What do you want? This isn't your time. Jim Cornette and the New New Midnight Express walk-in. The Prince of Polyster is dressed as outlandish as ever in a red jacket and pink pants, stroking his trademark tennis racket. Sarcastic Simon and Narcissistic Ned are wearing matching silver vests with their initials on the breastpocket and "MX" on the back. CORNETTE Well, I'm makin' it my time, brother, because the OAOAST is once again unfairly targeting Jim Cornette Enterprises. Last week they rebroadcast a match involving the Amazing Rando and a man I managed for a brief period of time before firing his sorry BUTT, much like I did to Tiffany Ruutu, Logan Mann and Holly-Wood, The Purist. This is clearly part of the OAOAST's strategy to run me out of the company because they think they can do to me what that Pizza Hut executive moron Jim Herd did in 1990. In case they forgot, all I did after leaving WCW was create Smoky Mountain Wrestling, one of the most acclaimed promotions this business has ever seen. You see, I came back stronger than ever. When I left the OAOAST in the Spring of 2003, I came back stronger than ever the following Spring with the New New Midnight Express. Sarcastic Simon and Narcissistic Ned. Twin sons from different mothers. Since they can't run me out, they do the next best thing -- hurt me by going after the greatest tag team alive today by booking them in a match against two guys whose singing is just as bad as their wrestling ability, Tiffany Ruutu and Logan "Usher" Mann. February 27th was the night we broke Tiffany's hand. Now the only drumstick he plays with is supplied by K.F.C. March 3rd was the night Logan lost his voice. April 3rd will be the night the music stopped. SIMON Tiffy, you live everyday of your live with the constant reminder of what the New New Midnight Express did to you at Zero Hour. You can't walk around outside, let alone in your own home, without flinching at every sound. Door slams. Flinch! (claps hands) Flinch! I hear the poor little thing even had to throw out his 52" TV and home entertainment system because he couldn't watch any program without being reminded of that wonderful night in Minnesota. Not even QVC. Simon laughs. NED Logan, you stole the most important thing in my life, my girlfriend. So I took the most important thing in yours...your voice! Sure your voice sounds like Homer strangling Bart, but we did the entire world a favor by silencing a voice that kills. CORNETTE (laughs) All right, boys. Come on, let's go. SCHAIVONE Hold on, gentlemen. CORNETTE When I'm through talkin' I'm through talkin'. And I'm through talkin', Schiavone. SCHAIVONE But wait a minute. You cut me off before I had a chance to announce what else has been signed for AngleMania IV. SIMON Black T vs. Zack Malibu and CWM. We know. SCHIAVONE No. I've been informed that you, Jim Cornette, will also be wrestling at AngleMania. CORNETTE Me?! That's gotta be some mistake. SCHIAVONE (hands Cornette index card) No. Look right there. Jim Cornette vs. Holly-Wood! SIMON (sarcastically) Is the Women's Title on the line? Heh. Cornette's eyes widen as he reads the card. He gulps and takes a few steps back, his face turning red. The Midnights help a jelly-legged Jim Cornette exit the interview position. SCHIAVONE Fans, AngleMania IV is shaping up to be one of the greatest nights in the history of our great sport. The event to be held on April 3rd at Trump Plaza is already sold out, but I invite you to join us from the comfort of your own home by calling your local cable or satellite company to order AngleMania IV right now.

The camera cuts to The Lightning Crew dressing room. The LC are all bored out of their minds from the looks on their faces. Each one is doing their own thing. Vitamin X is sitting on a chair impatiently. He finally stands up. VITAMIN X All right! That does it! I’m sick of having nothing to do! I haven’t wrestled in 2 weeks! PRL has gotten more wrestling and screen time than all of us combine! I just don’t want to sit here and watch PRL! I want to do something on my own! I HAVE to do something! I got to get out of here. This place is suffocating me! Vitamin X opens the door, and is greeted by "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican and his manager and “Career Consultant” Stephen Joseph Popick. X stops in his tracks. THA PUERTO RICAN Hey, X. Buddy. Wassup? Que Pasa? VITAMIN X Oh. Hello Boss. Pleasure to see you. Hope you are doing well. PRL Why yes, I am fine. How are you? VITAMIN X I am doing fine. I just wish I had something to do. I know I received that X-Division Title shot a few weeks ago, but I haven’t wrestled a lot since I came back. You, however, have been out there every single day, while me and the rest of The Lightning Crew all are back here, bored stiff. Yeah, we get title shots and matches sometimes, but it’s you that gets most of the attention. It’s you that gets the most T.V. time. What about us? We’re your friends! PRL Hey. Hey. Hey. Don’t be bitching to me! It’s YOUR own fault that you aren’t on T.V. as much as me. It’s YOUR fault that you aren’t wrestling every night. If only you actually went out there and DID something instead of waiting for me or Popick to help you out, then maybe you’d be somewhere. But hey, you haven’t. So, don’t bitch to me that you are still viewed as my lackeys, when you haven’t done anything to disprove that…. besides, it’s not my fault these people love me. I’m more charismatic, intelligent, talented, and sexier than any of you. Although Lindsay is pretty damn sexy too, I gotta admit that. Lindsay blushes at this comment. VITAMIN X So, you’re saying we have to go out there and kick some ass? PRL Yes. The OAOAST has plenty of superstars you could get your hands on. Just pick someone and kick ass. VITAMIN X Really? PRL Yeah. PRL puts his right arm around Vitamin X in a fatherly gesture. PRL X, dreams come true, if you work for it. If you just go out there, and do something, then boy, you will become a true superstar. Why you may even become the 24/7 Champion. Or X-Division Champion. Or Italian Champion. POPICK Ahem. (Points to the Italian Championship belt). PRL Okay forget about that one. Maybe you can be a Tag Team Champion with another Lightning Crew member. Just stay away from the World Title. That’s my belt to chase. But besides that, follow your dreams. One day, you will become a star. You will be seen as more than PRL’s lackey. You will be seen as Vitamin X: THE MAN! VITAMIN X Yeah. Yeah. YEAH! YOU’RE RIGHT! I CAN DO IT! I CAN DO IT! I’m going to go backstage, and KICK SOME ASS! PRL Yes. Yes. You do that! Pick somebody and beat them up! VITAMIN X Yeah! Yeah! All right! You got it! Let me show the world what Vitamin X is made out of! I’m going to lay the smackdown on some sad jabrony! Thanks PRL. You have some good advice! THA PUERTO RICAN Hey, no problem. VITAMIN X ALL RIGHT! I’M READY TO KICK SOME ASS! WOOOO! YEAH! KICK SOME ASS! LET’S GO! WOOO! Vitamin X opens the door and leaves, still talking to himself. Tha Puerto Rican closes the door, the smile on his face gone. THA PUERTO RICAN That oughta keep him busy for a while. God, I was sick of his bitching! Anyway, let’s talk about tonight. MR. BORICUA! MR. BORICUA SIR! PRL walks over to Boricua. PRL Now, tonight, you will face Panther. (Pop) PRL (Continuing) Now, I have to face Panther in a Steel Cage at AngleMania IV. So, I need you to do me a favor. I need to “get him ready” for the match if you know what I mean. I want you to soften him up. Do you get what I’m saying? MR. BORICUA Uh…no. PRL I want you to hurt him so that I can easily beat him at AngleMania. BORICUA Oh. THA PUERTO RICAN Okay, so I need you to concentrate on hurting him, but not TOO much. Leave some for me. Use all your power moves, and do NOT, do NOT allow him even a slight chance at offense. He’s a fast guy, but you’re pretty damn big. And size always beats speed no matter what. Just demolish him, and if you do that, you’ll get a cookie. MR. BORICUA Yea! Cookie! PRL All right my big dumb friend! Can you do this for your boss tonight? Mr. Boricua grunts. PRL Will you destroy Panther? But not too much? Mr. Boricua grunts. PRL Will you layeth the smacketh down on his candy ass? Mr. Boricua screams. THA PUERTO RICAN Okay! Okay! So, go out there, and kick ass for Tha Puerto Rican! MR. BORICUA I KICK ASS FOR THA PUERTO RICAN!!! Mr. Boricua screams and runs, but runs into the door. POPICK Whoops. Popick opens the door. Mr. Boricua tries that again, and runs out the door, screaming all along. PRL and Popick wave goodbye to him. THA PUERTO RICAN I surprise myself sometimes. STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK You give out some great advice, P.R. PRL I know. I’m the Puerto Rican Dr. Phil. “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican smiles a wide, but EVIL~!, grin. He and Stephen Joseph Popick look on, with Popick placing the Italian/Ukraine/Puerto Rican/(Insert A Country Here) Title on his right shoulder. (Bet you forgot he had that title, huh?) FADE OUT CABOOSE I certainly forgot about that title. COLE As did I. COACH A title based around someone's nationality? I've never heard of such a thing! I'm OFFENDED at the very... COLE Hey, it's Brock Ausstin. And it looks like he has something to say. Does he? *cameras take us to the back where Josh Matthews is standing with Brock Ausstin and his manager Rick Heyross in an open area. Brock stands there with a smug grin on his face, arms crossed, and proceeds to flex his pecs.* Matthews: Last week we saw you(Brock Ausstin) in an impressive win over Chris Stevens’ hired gun Jumbo. A few weeks back you made your return and in a stunning upset defeated The 70s Dude. *over hearing “upset” Rick Heyross pulls the mic and Josh’s hand with it infront of him.* Rick Heyross: An upset? To say upset implies that my client, Brock Ausstin, was not at all suppose to win. To do that would be criminally injust! Josh: Its just that Brock had been out of action for so long with the exception of The Lethal Rumble and… *Once again Rick takes the initiative to answer and Brock looks none-too-upset about it.* Rick: And who’s fault is that? Not Brock’s, and certainly not mine. The top people here have wanted to hide Brock and hold him back while people like Drek Stone get their chance to shine. Well thanks to new HeldDown GM Josie Baker that will be no more. Brock is back and… *just then a female scream can be heard and the cameras focus on Jackie Gayda who comes running from around the corner. She points to the direction she came from while trembling in moderate shock.* Jackie: Its…its…Calvin Szechstein. Something's happened to him! *Rick Heyross and Brock are left to watch Josh and the cameraman RACE~ to the scene. Upon arriving there they find Calvin laid out on his back with a red welt on his forhead and a dented chair laying beside him. Carl Winslow and OAOAST officials arrive at the scene and start tending to him while the camera fades to a top-notch vignette* A familiar green screen comes up: “The following PREVIEW has been approved for ALL AUDIENCES by the Boise Film Board.” Fade in on a darkened area, where nothing can really be made out. Footsteps are heard. *SNAP* The sound of the light switch echoes through the building as the overhead fluorescents flicker to life, revealing a small gym with a regulation sized ring sitting in the middle of it. The mat has seen better days, worn and torn from bodies being continuously slammed onto it. We zoom in on a blue gym bag, which is hanging and swaying from the shoulder of the source of the footsteps. The bag gets closer and closer to the camera until the footsteps stop. *THUMP* The bag drops to the floor as the camera pans up to reveal Prince Killings, dressed in a white tank top and grey sweat pants, apparently here to do some training. He steps through the ropes and starts to stretch. *CLACK* He hears the door to the gym open and then closes, assuming that his training partner has arrived, but the heavy footsteps he hears approaching makes him doubt that. The voice he hears confirms that. VOICE (with a Russian accent) Mr. Killings…..did you think that you could have foiled my plan so easily and without repercussion? The Russian colonel lights a cigarette, the flame of his lighter illuminating his face in the only still-darkened part of the gym. KILLINGS Why are you here, Nikloade? Want to watch me train for a bit? NIKLOADE No Mr. Killings. I’m here to watch you….die. *SNAP* Nikloade snaps his fingers and suddenly an army of ninjas storms into the gym from every direction, the dressing room (although Prince was just in there, so they must have found some damn good hiding spots), the door to the gym, a small window high on the wall, even under the ring. Soon there are dozens of them outside the ring surrounding a single target inside. NIKLOADE Enjoy your final training session…..Comrade. GO!!! Nothing happens for a moment, and then the ninjas storm the ring, but having the ninja-like courtesy to go at Killings one at a time. He dispatches the first wave with straight punches and kicks. *WHAP* *SMACK* *BIFF* A few more rush in, and Killings dispatches them with clotheslines and double noggin knockers. Seeing one stunned, he uses the ropes to propel himself into a flying kick, sending the ninja hurtling out of the ring like a bullet and through the same window that he came in. He hurls himself into the ropes again and goes airborne, taking out another with a bicycle kick, much like the one Liu Kang used in Mortal Kombat II. The force sends the ninja out of the ring and onto a group of other ninjas. *POW* *KAZAM* *BING* *AHOOOGAA* A few moments later, most of the ninjas lie unconscious all over the gym. The lucky ones still standing realize that their meter is about to run out and scamper away, to the shocked look of the colonel. Killings drags one of the ninjas from the pile and pins him, making his own count. *BAM* *BAM* *BAM* KILLINGS I win. Too angry to express in words, the colonel just stares at Killings as he steps out of the ring and heads for his gym bag, pulling out a water bottle and his sunglasses before sliding it back on his shoulder. He slips the glasses on and takes a swing from the bottle as he walks past the colonel, who is still staring at the carnage in the ring. KILLINGS Want to see more? Order Anglemania. Killings walks to the gym door and turns the lights out before he steps out, the scene turning black as the door closes. ---------------------------------------------------- OAOAST Top Contender AngleMania Showcase HOFF AngleMania III Still holding his neck, Hoff raises his eyes to CWM. A look of pain on his face, Hoff takes a step across the ring. CWM takes a tentative step towards Hoff, and the two meet as Hoff takes his had off of his neck. COLE "Oh my, what's gonna happen here. What else could even happen tonight?" CWM stares hard into Hoff's eyes. Hoff looks across the crowd, then stares back at CWM. A small Hoff chant breaks out as....Hoff extends his hand! COACH "No way!" CABOOSE "Is he gonna take it?!?" The fans pop HUGE and go BANANA as Hoff holds his hand out to CWM!! COLE "Remember, these guys were stablemates, teammates once, but after everything that's happened, can CWM really shake Hoff's hand?" CWM gazes at Hoff's hand for a long moment, then looks out across the crowd. Tears begin to run down Hoff's face as he stands still, hand out. CWM looks again at Hoff's hand...then begins to turn away. CABOOSE "I knew it. He can't do it." COLE "Wait wait..." CWM stops, standing half turned. The fans boo, then begin to cheer again as CWM turns back around. CWM looks at Hoff and mouths three words: "Is it over?" COLE "CWM wants to know, is it over? Is this over between them?" Hoff, tears streaming, nods and mouths the words "It's over....it's over and I'm sorry." CWM looks down....and GRABS HOFF'S HAND!!!! COLE "YES YES YES!" COACH "ALL RIGHT!!!" CWM pulls Hoff in and slaps him on the back as the fans again come alive!! COLE "Listen to these fans!!" COACH "Damn right!!" Hoff and CWM let go of each other as "Smells Like Teen Spirit" again kicks in over the speakers. CWM climbs the turnbuckle again and salutes the fans, then hops out of the ring. CWM plays to the rabid crowd all the way up the rams as Hoff turns and rests his head on the nearby top turnbuckle. COLE "Well what a victory for CWM...but what's with Hoff?" The EMTs again check on Hoff, but he flails his arm back and shoos them off. Hoff spins out of the corner, and orders all the staff back to the back. The team leaves the ring, as Hoff stands square in the middle of it. COLE "Oh man, look at Hoff..." The tears are streaming down Hoff's face in full force. Hoff looks to the lights, then back down at the mat as he wipes his eyes. COACH "I know Hoff really wanted to win tonight, but....man." COLE "Hoff said he had something to prove here..." Hoff shakes his head as he looks down, then turns his head back up to the lights. The fans go quiet as Hoff stands in the center of the ring... CABOOSE "You know what, guys? I might not like him...I might not respect him....but Hoff proved a lot to me here tonight." Suddenly, a section of fans in the front row stand and applaud. A few more begin to cheer, and suddenly the entire arena rises and gives Hoff a standing ovation. COLE "I think he proved it to the fans too!" Hoff looks tentatively to his left, then turns to face the standing crowd. Hoff turns to the right, and back to the left, and a soft, genuine smile breaks over his face. A small "Hoff" chant picks up across the fans as Hoff smiles. COLE "What a show of respect by these fans!" COACH "He proved it, Michael. He proved it to these fans, to you, to me, to 'Booze....he proved to the world that he can hang." The Hoff chant grows as Hoff looks across the crowd. He pounds his chest twice, and raises his arm as the fans cheer him on. Slowly, Hoff steps between the ropes, off the apron, and down the ramp to a standing ovation. OAOAST Top Contender Showcase

Has anybody reread the first post of this topic again to realize just how awful it originally was?

My deadlines are NOT to be messed with! Have it in by 9 or will it not get posted!! OMGARGHHH!!! *ego trip*