Valentino match recap by John Petrie (www.otherarena.com) and Nash match recap by CRZ (www.slashwrestling.com):
HARLEM HEAT vs. GREG "THE HAMMER" VALENTINE/BUDDY VALENTINO
Valentine is a wily veteran, while Valentino is a really fat guy with
white hair. The referee, new to WCW, is Mark Curtis, meaning more of the
dust has settled from the explosion that was the end of Smoky Mountain
Wrestling. (Well, not really an explosion.) The majority of the match
consisted of the Heat beating the unholy crap out of Valentino. El Super
Porky De Lucha Turner succumbs to the Harlem Hangover. The Heat then talk
to Mean Gene, dissin' the Nasty Boys. Out comes said Nasty persons and
they politely retort by slamming Booker T. into the railing and Stevie
Ray into the steps. They then drag Booker T. inside the ring and spike
piledrive him. In case you're having trouble remembering which Heat is
which, remember this: Booker T. is the one that can actually wrestle,
therefore "Stevie Ray - go away... Booker T.'s alright with me!"
WAR GAMES 2000 - RUSSO'S REVENGE for the World Heavyweight Championship - Here we go. Sting and Jarrett meet in the center of the bottom cage - Sting blocks, right, chop, right, dropkick, off the ropes with a clothesline that takes Jarrett outside. Sting follows and runs Jarrett's head into the side of the cage - and into THAT side of the cage. Right to the gut, right, head to a THIRD side of the cage. Sting stomps on the hands. Head to the STEEL steps. Back in the ring - Sting's bringing a ladder back in with him. He sets it up in the corner - but Jarrett is back up, right, right, right, right, right, right, head to the buckle, into the ladder is reversed and *Jarrett* hits it. Sting whips Jarrett into the ladder again as the ten second clock pops up. That was pretty much two minutes exactly. Sting stomps away on Jarrett as WHITE THUNDER comes out...wearing Virgil's face guard (those of you who thought I'd say "Test's face guard" aren't old school enough) from the injury Goldberg gave him last time they wrestled. Sting was trying to climb to the second cage without a ladder, but Steiner pulls him off the top rope - he hangs from the ceiling a while - Jarrett and Steiner ram the ladder into Sting's ribs until he lets go. Steiner directs Jarrett - then presses Sting - and drops him. The big red ladder is in and Steiner sets it up directly beneath the trapdoor to the second level. Jarrett whips Sting into the first ladder, set up in another corner. Steiner takes Sting and puts him in the ropes - shoulderblock. Elbowdrop. Jarrett stomps. Steiner stomps. Clock is up. Sting whipped into the ladder again - it's KRONYKK as Steiner climbs the ladder - and Jarrett tries to follow...but not quick enough. Steiner grabs bolt cutters from the wall of the second cage and undoes the chain keeping the door of the second cage closed. Meanwhile, Jarrett's getting worked over. Double shoulderblock. High Time for Jarrett. Adams climbs to the second level just as Steiner has managed to open the door of the second cage and toss the bolt cutters onto the roof - Adams with an uppernut. Clark up on the second level as well. Adams with a right. Clark with a clubbing blow. There are weapons all over this cage, and yet they're not using them....They press Steiner into the roof of the cage - three times. Dropped into a gutbuster. Next man out is VIC VENOM & THE HARRIS BROTHYRZ. If you're wondering how that isn't *three* men, well, you just don't get WCW. In the bottom ring, Jarrett and Sting are back on their feet - whip into the opposite corner by Sting, but Jarrett sidesteps the Stinget splash. Sting with a clothesline, clothesline, Scorpion Deathlock - as Russo watches from the apron. Meanwhile, the Harrisses are climbing up the outside of the cage as Clark is taking a kendo stick to Steiner - then to the Harrisses. Adams has one as well. Clark brings a garbage can - Heavy D with a garbage can - while these four garbage it up, let's go back to the bottom cage, where Sting has his sights set on Russo - Stinger splash! Sting gets Russo in a Scorpion Deathlock - and getting an assist from the ropes! Steiner is down to break that up as we take another look at the garbage taking place in the second cage. KEVIN NASH is out next. Into the ring...looking at Sting...then picking up Steiner...but Sting hits a Stinger splash on both of them! The next Stinger splash finds nobody as Steiner and Nash both pull away. Nash with a choke...and a chokeslam on Sting. Russo raises a hand in a high five...but Nash has *Russo* in a choke! Steiner tells him not to do it - Jarrett tells him not to do it - Nash lets go. While Russo begs for his life, Steiner tries to direct Nash over to Sting. Nash makes the international sign of ahhhhhhTHECHOKESLAAAAAM (or possibly Ze Claw) while we look out in the audience, where, somehow, the Harrisses and Kronic have ended up brawling away. Nash has Russo in the choke - Jarrett protests so Nash drops him and puts *Jarrett* in the choke. Steiner tries to get him to let go...Nash drops him and puts *Steiner* in the choke. Jarrett asks him to let go, and he does. Clock has ticked away and BOOKA T. comes out. Nash decides to lay out while Booker hits the ring - ducks a clothesline from Jarrett, gutshot, off the ropes with the axe kick. Steiner (who had been checking on Russo, lunges for T - T heads him off with a right, right, into the ropes, reversed, holding on, knee to the gut, and off the ropes with an axe kick for him! Russo tries a forearm - no effect - T dramatically turns around and Russo begs off. Gutshot for Russo - axekick to the helmet! T breakdances up...but Nash is in and he's got a big boot. Steiner stomps on T while Jarrett tells Nash it's time to go up! Russo, having apparently forged a tenuous alliance with Nash, points to Sting. As Jarrett sets up the ladder, Russo throws a loaded fist to Sting, then stomps on T. Jarrett points to the ladder, then joins in the stomping. The clock ticks down - Nash has Russo in the powerbomb position?? Too late to hit that, COLD BEER is trotting down to the ring - Nash leaves the ring *again* to let it play out. Elbow for Jarrett - one for Steiner. He grabs Russo - and Jarrett and Steiner beat on him from behind before he can do anything. Into the ropes, Goldberg with a double clothesline. Russo with the bat. Jarrett tosses Sting. Meanwhile, Booker T. has snuck up to the second cage unnoticed. Nash gives an evil eye to Sting on the outside. Russo, Jarrett and Steiner have shackled Goldberg to the ropes - Booker T is ready to climb up to the THIRD cage, but Steiner is finally up after him - Sting is behind him, and Jarrett's behind HIM. Steiner closes the door on T, and slams it on him again. Gutshot for Sting - rammed into the cage. Steiner with the foor. Crowd chanting "Goldberg" - as we look at Goldberg - dude is handcuffed to the ropes, he ain't movin'. Jarrett with a garbage can to T's head. Nash is content to stand out on the floor watching all this - his strategy is apparently to guard the door and mug whoever approaches it with the title belt. Sting getting the better of Jarrett and Steiner (thanks to a trashcan) - while this goes on, T has made it to the TOP cage. Steiner has his bat - and puts Sting down. T climbing the top cage - I guess there's nothing cool in it - the title belt is ABOVE the top cage. T on top...and he's got the belt. Good thing they didn't ALL just stand on the floor and wait for the belt to come to them, eh? T starts to climb down...punches for Jarrett - but he dropped the belt. T makes it to the roof of the second cage, grabs the belt - and waffles Jarrett with it. T hits Steiner right in the mask with the belt. T in the second cage and walking right by Sting - we all apparently missed when Sting was handcuffed to THIS cage. Steiner puts T down from behind - and now waffles *T* with the belt. Jarrett finds a gee-tar and breaks it over Booker T. Steiner has the belt...and drops it to the ring. Jarrett works on handcuffing Booker T. Russo has the belt - taunt for Goldberg. THE CAT is out for no apparent reason - Feliner to the helmet! Russo goes down and Cat picks up the belt...but now Nash has decided to get involved...knee to the gut - Truckstop Drop. Nash grabs the belt, strikes a pose. Goldberg decides, "hey, wait, maybe I can just break this handcuff if I YANK REALLY HARD" ... and does. Thrust kick for Nash. Big boot for Steiner. Right for Jarrett. He catches Russo's bat - and Russo catches a big right hand. Russo picks up Russo...but drops him to pick up the title. Goldberg poses...you know, you REALLY should save that pose for when you're outside the ring and have won the match. Goldberg through the ropes...and just as he reaches the door...well lookee there, it's BRET HART slamming the cage door on Goldberg *just* before he can leave the cage. Steiner pulls Goldberg's carcass out of there while Jarrett puts the belt in the ring. Russo grabs it...but Nash is up behind him and got him in a choke. Russo forks the belt over...and raises both his arms high. Steiner Recliner on Goldberg. Jarrett on the ropes with the bat, ready to strike...oh, but Nash hugs Russo. Gee whiz, it was another shocking swerve. They fooled us all. Nash leads the - well, whatever they are - not the NWO, mind you - no sir - in a count of three...and he crosses the threshhold. Diddly squat. Nash retains. (18:56) Credits are up and we're out.
