Toshiaki Koala

Niskie, I think Kansai and Yokota would kill you for calling them guys. Anyway, I'll only answer a few of these because I'm tired and there are a lot. 3)Hulk Hogan vs Ultimate Warrior I've always been a closet Hulkamaniac, but I've never seen a Hogan match as compelling as Warrior vs. Savage, which might be my favorite North American match. BUT... that match was all Savage. I pick Hogan. 5)Shawn Michaels vs Marty Jannetty Marty didn't have the opportunities that Shawn had, but I find him much more interesting to watch. And his match with Angle kills anything Shawn has done recently, except Shawn's own match with Angle at Mania. 7)Macho Man vs Ricky Steamboat Macho was in my favorite WWF match ever, or at least Top 3. Steamboat was in my favorite NWA match ever. I'll go with Steamboat, since the match in question (vs. Flair, of course) is better than the Savage one. I do love them both, though. 9)Midnight Express vs Kawada/Taue I've never seen a Midnights match, which is horrifying. But I HIGHLY doubt that they can match the greatness of the Holy Demon Army. What an awesome name. 10)Benoit vs Dynamite Kid I've loved what little Dynamite I've been exposed to, but Benoit might be the greatest wrestler I've ever seen that isn't named Akira Motherfucking Hokuto. 14)Mayumi Ozaki vs Akira Hokuto Hokuto can claim the greatest single match performance (and greatest match, probably) in wrestling history, and that's enough for me. No wrestler has EVER been better at making an emotional connection with the audience. 15)Atlantis vs Blue Panther I've only seen one match from each of them, and the Atlantis match was better. Plus, he's unbelievably cool. But one match is not enough, even though it was for Hokuto. I should watch more lucha. 16)Edge vs Randy Orton Orton, quite easily. His recent work in particular obliterates anything Edge has done. Of course, that work includes matches with Rey, Benoit, and Finlay, while Edge has been feuding with John Cena and Hacksaw Jim Duggan. 18)Eddy Guerrero vs Misawa I love both these guys so very much. Even if he was alive, however, I couldn't bring myself to vote against Eddie. 22)Kurt Angle vs Dean Malenko I'm a big Angle fan, but Malenko is just fascinating to watch. And Angle has been sucking big-time lately. 24)Bret Hart vs The Rock Bret. Just compare their Sharpshooters. 25)Brock Lesnar vs Kenta Kobashi Kobashi. He's Kenta Kobashi, for Christ's sake. 26)Low Ki vs American Dragon Low Ki is an incredible heel. Danielson is just plain incredible.

Johnny Ace does a good moonsault. Seriously.

That Smackdown 6-man was awesome. People say they only watch Raw, and I say, "Why don't you go kill yourselves?"

Okay, that was kind of awesome.

Actually, I agree. I really don't analyze wrestling while I watch it. Most of the time I do just turn my brain off and allow myself to be entertained. But... you know what? Finlay is as fun to watch as any wrestler in the company right now. Even if I didn't care about psychology and whatnot, I'd still enjoy the hell out of his matches and promos. How can you not have smiled when he rand down to the ring for no reason whatsoever and administered a beating to the midgets? Michaels, however, doesn't entertain me nearly as much. I actually loved the Wrestlemania match with Angle - it was wrestled exactly as a "dream match" should be - and the Hogan feud had its moments. But most of the time, he's boring, on the mic and in the ring. I mean, to each his own; but even from a mark's perspective (at least, the mark inside me) Finlay owns him in every way.

Shit like this is why I spend most of my net time at DVDVR instead of here. What does Michaels do that makes him a good wrestler? What? There is a HUGE difference between who he really is in the ring and who the announcers say he is. When he wrestles, it looks fake. He flops around like a beached flounder for the weakest of strikes, throws a few horrible ones of his own (have you SEEN his punches and chops), takes the opponents finisher, kicks out, Jesuses up, superkick. That's it. His matches have no substance - he just runs drearily through the motions. Everything he does is choreographed and masturbatory. But -- he's old and can do moonsaults from time to time, so he's a great wrestler! Someone like Finlay (or Benoit, or Rey) makes wrestling look like a competition. He wrestles like he's trying to win, not show off his weave and waxed chest hair and godawful strikes. Everything he does makes sense. Plus, his character is totally awesome. Seriously, though - why do you think Finlay is bad? Would you please explain it? It's not likely, but maybe you actually have some incredibly deep higher knowledge of wrestling, and we're the ones who are dead wrong. Who knows?

Maybe he IS bin Laden~! I found this on another message board, posted by a guy who found it on yet another board. It's quite scary.

Bloody Shredded Baby Cocks. Come on, did you really expect any serious responses from this board?

That's kind of like saying "better than metastatic bone cancer." What isn't? But Smackdown was really good tonight. Benoit vs. Orton was the best match I've seen from either guy in... forever, and anyone who still doubts that Henry is better than Shawn Michaels is a fool.

I was making fun of Mark Levin, so you should tell him that. But you must not be familiar with him, as it appears the subtlety was lost on you.

Don't you mean The New York Slimes?

Well, he only excretes a promo every three months or so, and edits a different wrestler name into his match slightly more often. I could do that, but would anyone want me to?

Ah, of course. You must forgive me for not appreciating the Transformers, by the way - they were before my time.

I thought he died in the stupid Transformer movie. Zordon, now there's a guy who could do some good in today's world.

True. It requires no skill or mental input whatsoever, so it's easy to see why people who hate penguins would enjoy it. I must break 1,000!!!!!

Any "established" poster who just makes lame inside jokes about TSM instead of posting things that are actually interesting. Go. Away.

Has Kevin Cook ever posted here? I don't think he has. But he sucks a dick fiercely wherever he goes. Murmuring Beast. Burn.

^ That was supposed to be posted under my username, but I forgot to log my brother out. My point stands, though. As fun as the game is, no animal is as cool as a penguin (literally and figuratively). They really shouldn't be smashed. My, um, bad.

I got 666. I'AM TEH DIVEL!!

I think it's pedophilic, but pedophilial sounds like "filial," which would imply that you are corpsefucking your son. Which is rather vile.

This game is disgusting. Who would want to hurt a penguin? Why can't it be the penguin with the mace, hitting the faggot snowman thing? Down with Hit The Penguin With The Mace! It is kind of addictive, though.

So is Edge's dog.

Guys, don't you get it? All the rumors about Kurt Angle dying make it obvious that he's not going to die. That's just the way it works. I will nominate only one person: the Dynamite Kid. But I really hope I'm wrong.

My memory is foggy, but I don't recall her going crazy until assholes from the board harassed her and posted pictures of her house online. Or was it the other way around?

Akira Hokuto, the greatest wrestler to ever live, was in WCW and did jack shit aside from winning the truly worthless women's championship. It's quite sad.