Llakor
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Official Results for IWS Devil’s Night
Saturday, October 29th, Montreal, Le Break
Attendance: 412
The Devil in Kevin Steen
In other promotions; in Japan; in California, Kevin Steen is known as a shit-disturbing, smart-alec. In Montreal, Kevin Steen is so hated, so loathed that he can start riots. In Montreal, he has already had pitchers of beer thrown at his head, he has already had garbage cans emptied on top of him from a balcony and then dropped on him. Last night, IWS fans, some almost old enough to be collecting a pension, had to be restrained from taking a swing at Steen as “Mr. Wrestling” almost started a riot and did start a brawl that eventually took the entire IWS locker-room to pull apart.
Here is what you need to know about the International Wrestling Syndicate: we are the first (and only) Canadian promotion to run in Philadelphia’s Viking Hall, the famed ECW Arena; we are the promotion where “Sycho” Sid “Vicious” made his return to wrestling after snapping his leg like a dry twig in the dying days of WCW; we were the first Canadian promotion to have its own pay-per-view; but most of all, you need to know that we are a Montreal based wrestling promotion. In Montreal, we take our wrestling seriously; we hold grudges until they are buried and we can spit on the graves; we are passionate.
In the IWS, we wrestle without barriers, both physically - literally, we do not use ring barriers - and emotionally, wrestling for the emotions of our fans. To do this requires huge trust between us and our fans. We trust our fans not to abuse how close they get to our wrestlers. And our fans trust us. Kevin Steen abuses that trust. No. I’m sorry. Abuses? He does not abuse that trust... he anally rapes it... without lube.
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Quick and Dirty Results for IWS Devil’s Night
Damian & Beef Wellington beat Jagger Miles & Black Devil in 5:03.
Fred la Merveille beat Player Uno in 11:04.
Hardcore Ninjaz (Hardcore Ninja Number One and the Evil Ninja) beat SLI-USA (Maxime Boyer and Shayne Hawke) in 10:07.
Viking beat Lionel Knight in 5:37.
2.0 (Jagged and Shane Matthews) defended their IWS tag team titles beating “The Rock and Clock Connection” (Twiggy & Pornstar Juan) in 9:14.
Green Phantom beat Tomassino in 7:32 earning five minutes in the ring alone with Joey Soprano.
Kid Kamikaze pinned Dan Paysan for the IWS Canadian title as defending champion Chris Bishop looked on in 12:09.
EXesS defended his IWS title beating Sexxxy Eddy in a First Blood match at 25:38.
El Generico & Kevin Steen beat the Flying Hurricanes (Takao and Kenny the Bastard) in 24:37.
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From the Time Keeper’s Table
Detailed Results for IWS Devil’s Night
Before Devil’s Night began, IWS owner PCP Crazy F’N Manny came to the ring to “apologize” to the fans for his actions over the previous months, professing shock over the behaviour of Kevin Steen and El Generico at Blood, Sweat and Beers. Kevin Steen, summoned to the ring by Manny, turned the IWS owner back against the crowd in about five seconds flat and went on to convince Manny to change the booking for Devil’s Night. Dropping kayfabe to reveal that Beef Wellington is the booker for the IWS, Kevin Steen got Manny to put Beef and Damian in an impromptu dark match. (So that Steen and El Generico would not have to face them in the main event.)
Manny summoned Jagger Miles and the Black Devil from the back to wrestle against Damian and Beef Wellington. Did I say “wrestle”? I think I meant “summarily executed”. To the cheers of the blood-thirsty IWS fans, Damian kicked the Black Devil unconscious in less than a minute, leaving Jagger to face Beef and Damian alone. It is to his credit that Jagger lasted as long against those two as he did, but after 5:03 Beef lifted Jagger into the Package Pile Driver and Damian spiked it with a double foot stomp from the top.
Annoyed that Beef used his trademark finisher, Kevin Steen had Manny throw Beef and Damian out of the building. With his opponents for the night banished, Steen threw out an open challenge... answered by the Flying Hurricanes.
Devil’s Night proper began with Fred la Merveille coming to the ring accompanied by George W. Bush (or at least a cardboard cut-out of the U.S. President.) Much to the dismay of the crowd, Fred had himself announced as coming from Ste-Anne-des-Plaines, New York and insisted on singing the US National anthem in distinctive Fred la Merveille style. In the ensuing match against the beloved Player Uno, Fred la Merveille won with assistance from the SLI-USA (Maxime Boyer and Shayne Hawke) after 11:04, but not before Uno came within a heartbeat of beating Fred with an M. Bison double foot stomp from the top rope onto the back of Fred’s neck.
With the SLI-USA already in the ring, Fred summoned the Hardcore Ninjaz to the ring. Evening the odds against them with the help of their trademark kendo sticks, the Ninjaz won a hard fought battle after 10:07. The win came despite massive cheating on the part of SLI-USA and the best efforts of Maxime Boyer who is already good, but seems to get better every time that I see him. In fact, Maxime was poised to win the match by leaping off the top rope onto Hardcore Ninja Number One when the Evil Ninja crotched him on the top rope. And when I say “crotched on the top rope” I don’t mean that the Ninja lightly brushed the ropes and Maxime lost his balance and fell. I mean the Evil Ninja grabbed Maxime’s right leg, damn near pulled it out of it’s socket, Maxime landed on the ropes full speed and then ricocheted off them onto his head.
Pissed off at the loss of the SLI-USA, Fred la Merveille refused to leave the ring to allow the next match to start... a position that he flip-flopped on in a hurry when IWS ring announcer announced Viking was coming to the ring. Fred bailed, leaving Maxime and Shayne to get pounded by Viking. His opponent, Lionel Knight, took advantage to ambush Viking from behind. This initial advantage evaporated quickly as the always emotional Viking seems to have finally found a way to harness that volatility to ensure victory. Viking pinned Lionel Knight in 5:37 after his “Tueur des Policiers”.
(Excuse the digression, but I need to Speak On This. I have previously written about how a variety of IWS stars have elevated their game this year: Damian, Tomassino, Kid Kamikaze. Viking just joined that list and he did so in dramatic fashion. Coming to the ring in a new grittier, more urban outfit with a stapler dangling from his neck - the stapler being a trademark of Viking’s in his pre SLI days - Viking flashed the crowd a new hand signal: grabbing his right wrist with his left hand and spreading his fingers wide. I didn’t get it at first. In my notes I wrote, “Viking signals for the Claw?” Then, Viking set up Lionel Knight in the corner and CHARGED across the ring to slap his chest and I got it. Viking was calling for LE SLAP. And let me tell you, Viking’s running slaps on Lionel’s chest were so loud that there were customers in the Video 2000 downstairs from Le Break wincing.
Quebec has this weird tendency to focus on a wrestler’s “shape”. I have always argued that you should focus on a wrestler’s cardio... and his passion. Viking does not have the shape; he runs a little to the chubby side; he looks like a guy who enjoys the odd six-pack... or two. But passion? Intensity? Look, Lionel Knight is a talented wrestler. He can take care of himself in the ring. But last night Viking tore him apart and the crowd ERUPTED for it. The Viking bandwagon is leaving the station - get on board now.)
The Sultans of Smug, 2.0, Jagged and Shane Matthews wanted an easy title defence so they hand-picked their opponents calling out the two men that they named “The Rock and Clock Connection” Twiggy and Pornstar Juan. The tag team champions badly underestimated their opponents however. Perhaps taking inspiration from a crack that I made that the only way that Twiggy could be considered a high calibre opponent was if he was fired out of a cannon, Juan turned his own partner into a weapon using him in a series of innovative moves to batter down 2.0. In the end, “Uncle Manny” had to come to the ring to save 2.0’s belts and give them the win after 9:1. Truly 2.0 can say that they have been “Touched by an Uncle!”
How strong is Tomassino? Last night “Il Mostro” proved his strength in dramatic fashion, putting the Green Phantom through the top rope barely seconds into their match. When I say that, I don’t mean that he clothes-lined the Hardcore Hero over the top rope. I mean that he charged the Green Phantom and hit the top rope so hard that it snapped like a piece of stale licorice. While the ring crew scrambled to remove the broken steel cable from the ring, the two men pounded on each other, in and out of the ring. The stipulations for the match were that the Green Phantom got five minutes in the ring alone with Tomassino’s manager, Joey Soprano, if he won, but that if he lost the Hardcore Hero would have to sign onto Soprano’s stable.
Despite Tomassino’s size and strength, the Green Phantom emerged victorious after 7:32. While he had five minutes with Joey Soprano, it only took the Hardcore Hero a minute and a half to make an impression on Joey Soprano, wiping him out with a light tube skateboard.
Fortunately, we had already planned an intermission after the Green Phantom/Tomassino match as it gave our ring crew enough time to rearrange the ring ropes so that instead of having no top rope, we ended up with no bottom rope for the last three matches.
After the intermission, Chris Bishop defended his IWS Canadian title coming to the ring with the belt for the first time after stealing it back from Kid Kamikaze the night before at UWA Hardcore wrestling in Mississauga, Ontario. Bishop defended the title against Dan Paysan (accompanied by an underdressed D-Vyn) and against Kid Kamikaze who came to the ring with Vanessa Kraven dressed up as Storm from the X-Men in her old school classic billowing white and yellow outfit.
My notes tell me that Dan Paysan was an Italian whirlwind last night: suplexing Chris Bishop into Kid Kamikaze in the corner; pile driving Chris Bishop through two chairs; breaking up a Chris Bishop bridge pin on Kid Kamikaze with a top-rope double foot stomp; joining Bishop for an insane double dive to the outside. Ironically, Dan was poised for victory when Kid Kamikaze kicked a chair into Dan’s face for the pin at 12:09. In other words, Chris Bishop lost his Canadian title without getting pinned for it.
Making his return to the IWS, Sexxxy Eddy demanded a title shot against EXesS, the man who stole his IWS title and helped put Eddy on the shelf with a bloody mouth injury that eventually cost Eddy two teeth. On his arrival at Devil’s Night, Eddy demanded that a stipulation be added to the match: First Blood. This first ever IWS First Blood match also saw Eddy wrestling in a shirt for the first time that I can remember. This ended up costing Eddy the match in unusual fashion. Eddy discarded the shirt rather dramatically about fifteen minutes in. Eddy finally busted open EXesS after about twenty minutes, but Senior Official P-Nut was unconscious by that point and EXesS smartly kept kicking him to keep him down until he could retrieve Eddy’s shirt and wipe off the blood. When P-Nut finally regained consciousness at 25:38, it was Eddy who was bleeding. P-Nut immediately awarded the match to EXesS.
EXesS got on the mike to crow about his victory and to taunt the IWS locker room that there was no one in the back who could beat him. At this point, former IWS champion, Pierre Carl Ouellet hit the ring and introduced EXesS to his “blue ting” a giant blue cast that covers virtually his entire right arm. PCO’s clothesline damn near took off EXesS’ head.
Long-time IWS fans might remember that there is history between these two men. PCO beat EXesS in his very first IWS title defence during Violent Valentines, February 28th, 2004. Later that year, in May, during Tournament of the Icons, EXesS got his revenge by beating PCO by submission with a slight assist from then IWS Commissioner Joseph FitzMorris who pulled the ropes just out of PCO’s reach three times so that it appeared to the ref that PCO had actually tapped three times.
In the main event, Kevin Steen and El Generico beat the Flying Hurricanes after 24:37 despite some high-flying heroics from the former IWS tag team champions including a criss-cross double dive and a scaffold “Slither” splash by Kenny the Bastard. During the match, Kevin Steen tried (and failed) to execute Beef Wellington’s trademark ass punch to taunt his rival.
(For those of you were wondering how effective a heel El Generico could possibly be... Effective, hated, loathed, ass-hole traitor. In fact, he has inspired with such a hatred for all things Spanish that after I post this article I am going to take a two by four to the back of the head of my illegal immigrant Chilean gardener and then go to a cinema playing “The Legend of Zorro” and yell “FIRE!”)
After the match, Kevin Steen damn near started a riot, leading to a surreal moment as IWS security restrained a near senior citizen from taking a shot at Steen. Just as it seemed that the crowd was about to take matters into their hands, Damian and Beef Wellington charged back into Le Break. The ensuing brawl took the entire IWS locker room to clear and keep the four men apart. Beef issued a challenge to Kevin Steen and El Generico for the next IWS show, December 3rd, Season’s Beatings. In the chaos, it is unclear whether Steen and Generico accepted the challenge, although it is certainly clear that Steen further infuriated the crowd by hurling racial epithets at Beef Wellington related to his pairing with former “Angry Aryan” Damian.
When I asked Mike Burns how much of the riot he got, he told me “Everything!” despite the fact that filming inside the chaos must have been the wrestling equivalent of filming inside a hurricane.
Our next show is Season’s Beatings, Saturday, December 3rd, 2005 at Le Break, 20 Cremazie East (corner of St-Laurent near Metro Cremazie), Montreal, Quebec, CANADA. Doors open at 7:30 pm, show starts at 9:00 pm. 18+ Card and schedule subject to change. VIP tickets are $20, Regular tickets are $15. You can purchase VIP tickets at Le Break or online by paypal ([email protected])
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www.syndicatewrestling.com/images/multimedia/Oct05Bloodstream.wmv
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This is dedicated to Mikhail T Rotch, Esquire... Nintendork Extraordinaire.
I received a call from Fred la Merveille the other day. Actually “received a call” is not really the right word(s). I was given instructions. I was briefed on my mission. Fred la Merveille has decided that there is nothing more important than his “Croisade” and he has decided to expropriate this column to get his message out.
When We Were Marks
Fred La Merveille, the SLI-USA and the New Crusade
Saturday, October 23rd, 2004. Montreal, International Wrestling Syndicate gala “Blood, Sweat and Beers”. Mike Burns, owner of Smart Mark Video, is making his second 800 mile trip to Montreal to tape the show. He still has reservations: the wrestlers are talented, the crowd is hot, almost to the verge of being out-of-control, but the booking seems odd. With an opportunity for international exposure, the IWS has decided to build the show around a main event pitting their young champion, Kevin Steen, against a French comedy wrestler, the feud based around the accusation that Kevin Steen isn’t French enough. It seems like a feud that only Quebeckers would care about.
The comedic French wrestler is Fred la Merveille, who proceeds to have the match of his life against Kevin Steen and possibly the best match of Steen’s title run. In fact, Fred is poised to win the belt, when his SLI faction flunky Damian hits the ring and hands in his resignation by kicking Fred in the face as hard as he can. The ensuing feud between the two men becomes one of the major draws for the promotion and makes Damian a star.
As Mike Burns learned that night, you should never underestimate Fred la Merveille and you should never predict what will happen when Fred is involved.
Fred’s IWS career started January 11, 2003 ”Season’s Beatings” with a title shot - one of a series of jobbers brought into the IWS by heel champion the Green Phantom to give him an easy road to defending his title while he avoided Dru Onyx. But a funny thing (literally) happened in the match... Fred, announced as “Wonder Fred”, got the crowd on his side with his drop dead perfect mimicry of the Phantom’s physical mannerisms. Not only did it bring the crowd on his side, it also rattled the Phantom enough to give Wonder Fred a chance to win - until the Green Phantom hit Fred with a tree - again, literally, as the Phantom hit Fred with a decorated Christmas Tree.
It seemed like the IWS had found a new comedic hero, but Fred had other ideas. At the very next show, February 15th, 2003 ”Violent Valentines” Fred swiped the mike and announced to the stunned crowd that beginning immediately, he would be the “language police” of the IWS and that he was no longer to be referred to as “Wonder Fred” but as “Fred la Merveille” The result: Instant Pandemonium. The English IWS had gotten its first truly French heel and nothing would be the same ever again.
On May 17th, 2003 during “Body Count” Fred la Merveille brought Viking and Damian, the Angry Aryans, to the ring. The pair of repulsive racists had been destroyed the month before with Viking rather famously set on fire. Fred explained to them that their hatred of minorities had nothing to do with the colour of their skin and everything to do with the fact that they didn’t speak French. In an instant, the Syndicat de Lutte Internet was formed. The crowd was galvanized. IWS champions Hi-5, Kid Kamikaze and Beef Wellington, normally hated rule-breakers were suddenly transformed into heroic anglophones as the largely English crowd broke into song: singing the Canadian National Anthem much to Fred’s disgust. Provoking a group of complacent Canadians Anglophones to become patriotic and start singing is the rough Canadian equivalent to an English football riot. (Soccer to you Yanks.)
While the SLI did not win the IWS tag team title on their first opportunity, they did win the title eventually, January 17th, 2004 during “Praise the Violence”. A strange thing happened on the way to that victory however. The SLI became cool and being cool became faces by default. Right from their first appearance, there had been a vocal minority backing the SLI singing French separatist songs in opposition to “Oh Canada!” Gradually, show by show, Fred’s backers grew until by Praise the Violence, it felt universal.
When the SLI lost their tag team titles and a bitter Damian turned on Fred, it seemed certain that the IWS fans would back Fred. Much to his disgust however, the fans ended up cheering for the violent cool of Damian. Dejected, depressed, Fred came to Philadelphia, July 9th, 2005 for the IWS’ first US show “Freedom to Fight” in the historic Viking Hall, the former ECW Arena. Fred tried to cut a promo in French and was not only drowned out, it led to a U-S-A chant in support of the very much Canadian Beef Wellington. A lesser man might have broken. Not Fred. In fact, he seemed to gather strength from the animosity and went after Beef with a new-found vigour. Beef won the match, but Fred won the crowd, earning a loud “Please Come Back” chant.
As Mike Burns had found out in Montreal, Fred la Merveille may seem to be a regional character, but once you see him, you realize that his appeal is universal.
Rejuvenated by the Philadelphia fans and revolted by the fans of the IWS, Fred proceeded to dismantle the SLI, piece by piece. What he had created, he would now destroy... attacking his former partner Viking, punctuating the death of the SLI by putting Viking through a chair with a top rope swinging Pedigree.
The question became: What would Fred la Merveille do next?
The answer came September 17th, 2005 at “Blood, Sweat and Beers”. Just as the year before, Blood, Sweat and Beers would mark a milestone for Fred la Merveille. Ambushing Viking and destroying his valet Elsa Bangz to drive home the point that the past was dead, Fred la Merveille introduced the new SLI, Maxime Boyer and Shayne Hawke, and announced that from now on it was the SLI-USA, unveiling his new inspiration with a cardboard cut-out of George W. Bush. Fred offered his total admiration and support for the U.S. President.
SLI-USA! Fuck Yeah!
Fred Gestures to His Inspiration George W. Bush.
In the background, Maxime Boyer. In the foreground, Shayne Hawke.
Fred has made it clear (to me at least) that he intends to do more than pay lip service to this declaration, that he will work to help George W. Bush. It is as a result of this that Fred has decided to tackle the most pressing issue facing the U.S.A. today: the violence and pornography taking over video games.
Fred began his research into this disturbing topic in the great state of Florida. “La Floride” is a place with a special spot in the heart of Quebeckers. Fred was heartened to discover that in this place where George W Bush’s renaissance of American Democracy began that the opposition to video game violence and pornography was alive and well. Leading the charge, attorney Jack Thompson is trying to achieve through litigation what appears impossible to achieve through legislation. Holding video game creators to the same standards as cigarette manufacturers.
As part of a wrongful death lawsuit on behalf of two police officers and a police dispatcher who were killed by Devin Moore “who obsessively trained on Grand Theft Auto: Vice City to kill them,” Mr. Thompson wrote what he called “A Modest Proposal” offering $10, 000 to any video game creators prepared to base a game around Devin Moore’s crimes. (Presumably, it would include an eating babies mini-game.)
Fred reports to me that the video game industry responded to this cunning and original piece of satire with typical and bloody literalism - creating the game in a matter of days. Naturally, Jack Thompson refused to pay the $10, 000. At which point, Jerry Holkins and Michael Krahulik of http://www.penny-arcade.com a popular web-comix/game review site, made a charitable donation on Jack Thompson’s behalf towards the Entertainment Software Association Foundation. Naturally, this throughly un-American behaviour has Fred shocked and appalled.
Fred la Merveille calls upon Mr. Holkins and Mr. Krahulik to act like Real Americans and to cease these criminal acts of charity immediately. (Actually, I pointed out to Fred that making a charitable donation can’t actually be illegal. Fred’s response, “Ben ca devrait etre par example!”)
Fred informed me that he continued his research into the depravity of the video game industry. Shocked by Grand Theft Auto which he described to me as “un facon de s’entrainer pour tuer des policiers! C’est dangereux ca! Quelqu’un peut me tromper pour un policier!”
But it was while playing a seemingly innocent game from a gentler time that Fred found how deep and how long-standing this moral decay extended. While playing a two player version of Super Mario Brothers (with Marc le Grizzly) Fred discovered a secret Easter Egg at the end of the game. Once having saved the princess, she expressed her gratitude to the Plumber brothers in a pixelated menage a trois... a Luigi/Mario sandwich with Princess filling, if you will. Disgusted by this plumber on princess on plumber action, Fred made the decision that the only way to bring the video game industry to its senses was to target its mascot: Player Uno.
I feel I should explain who Player Uno is.
Not the best picture of Uno, but it does show off his snazzy gear with the classic 8-bit Nintendo joystick on the pants.
The Secret (Albeit Geeky) Origin of Player Uno
You may remember the Great North-Eastern Black-Out about three years ago that was originally blamed on a faulty transformer in Canada, before they tracked the fault back to the States (somewhere in Upper New York state... or Ohio, I forget.) Anyway, not largely reported was what happened in Ottawa. When the black out hit Ottawa it was preceded by a massive power surge that had some unexpected effects...
The day of the black out there was a fan convention for the original eight bit Nintendo machine. The organizers managed to gather exactly 512 of the original machines, still in perfectly working order. A massive tournament was in the process of being played when the power surge hit, frying - nay melting - all of the machines and knocking unconscious close to one thousand Nintendorks in the process. (Their name not mine, I swear.)
When they regained consciousness...
They found an unconscious Mountie and a slightly smoking, twitching masked figure... who turned out to be Player Uno. The Mushroom Kingdom’s resident super-hero. With the heart of Little Mac from Knockout, the mystique of Shy Guy from Super Mario Brothers 2 and the courage of Simon Belmont from Castlevania, Player Uno was reportedly the bastard son of Amazon from Pro Wrestling and Samus Aran from Metroid. Glimpsed rather than seen in the eight-bit games, Player Uno could be found in a comic book in Luigi’s pocket, in a headline on a newspaper, in the marquee of a movie theatre.
The assembled Nintendorks immediately adopted Player Uno and carried him off to a triumphant dinner of Cheetos and Jolt Cola, leaving behind the unconscious body of Sergeant Renfrew of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police.
Brainstorming for a way for Player Uno to make a living, the assembled Nintendorks decided that it would be only proper for Player Uno to follow in his father’s footsteps and become a professional wrestler
This, then is the beloved mascot of the gaming industry that Fred la Merveille will face in Montreal this Saturday, October 29th, during IWS’ Devil’s Night. Fred considers this no less than a battle for “l’Ame de l’Amerique!” And when Fred is forced to become violent, when he is forced to destroy Uno, when he is forced to cripple Uno, to discard him into the recycling bin like the ancient decrepit gaming system that he sprang from... this too will be the fault of the Video Gaming Industry...
And another triumph for George W. Bush and his French disciple, Fred la Merveille.
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Sunday, October 23rd, 2005: Air Generico Goes International!
While I may consider him a feeelthy traitor, give the devil his due. El Generico will be making a European tour from Nov 10th to Nov 13th with stops in England and Germany. Here is the announcement written for the UK...
Fans of "The Generic Luchador" El Generico will be pleased to hear that he will be making a UK appearance during the Wrestle Zone Wrestling show held on Thursday, November 10th, at the Lightfoot Centre in Newcastle-Upon-Tyne during WZW's Third Anniversary show entitled "Independence Day". According to my sources, he will team with Super Dragon against the Full Pack (Micky L. & Iain Robinson)
Hailing originally from Tijuana, Mexico, El Generico fled to Montreal after am unfortunate training accident involving his trademark BrainBuster (a move already illegal in Mexico especially the way that El Generico does it.) Making his professional debut in Montreal on July 13th, 2002 during the then Internet Wrestling Syndicate's Scarred For Life show. (The IWS now stands for the International Wrestling Syndicate to mark the IWS wrestlers going International like El Generico, Kevin Steen and Sexxxy Eddy as well as the IWS being invited to perform in Philly at Viking Hall the historic ECW arena.)
After making his debut in Montreal, El Generico has gone on to become a star with JAPW in New Jersey, CZW in Philadelphia, and has been featured in CHIKARA, IWA-MS, IPW:UK in England and wXw in Germany. In fact, he returns to wXw on Saturday and Sunday, November 12th and 13th. Most famously, El Generico is a star of California's PWG promotion where he has been the PWG tag team champion with the Human Tornado. The "Generic Luchador" is more popular in California than most luchadores who actually live there!
He has also been the IWS champion beating Pierre Carl Ouellet for the belt making him one of the few people ever to pin in Quebec the three-time WWF tag team champion (with Jacques Rougeau Jr. in the Quebeckers)
The IWS web-site can be found here:
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com
This is a rare chance to see one of the most exciting, high-flyers in Indy Wrestling. I strongly encourage you to go to the WZW show to see him live.
The blow-by-blow account of his first match can be found here:
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=7711
(WARNING: It's LONG. And when I say it's LONG, I am not kidding.)
El Generico's origin story can be found here:
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=24405
The origin story of El Generico's cape can be found here:
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=27698
(WARNING: After some discussion of recent events in Montreal and the announcement of his matches in Germany, the story of El Generico's cape turns into a prose poem as narrated by Volstagg from Marvel Comic's "The Mighty Thor" Yes, I am in fact a geek.)
Venue Address:
The Lightfoot Centre
Wharrier Street
Walker
Newcastle-Upon-Tyne
NE6 3BR
For more details about the show, click here:
For more details about wXw's show "The Fight Club" in Essen, Germany where El Generico will also be appearing click here:
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I look forward to Devil's Night next Saturday, October 29th with enthusiasm, with excitement... and with emotions mixed (and blended) like a fruit smoothie. This will be the first show that El Generico comes out as a heel. He certainly deserves to be booed for choosing to stand with Kevin Steen and for kicking his room mate, his best friend, Beef Wellington, in the face with an OLE! kick.
And yet, at the same time, ye olde school fans like me, we helped to create El Generico. We turned him from a one night joke into a fixture. We cheered him so hard that we essentially forced him into the main event. Perhaps El Generico arrived in the main event of the IWS too soon. But we had the pleasure of watching him grow into the role, of getting better and better. We had the pleasure of watching him go to other feds and proving how good he was there.
And because we discovered him (first), because we "Created" him, when others discovered him, we felt pride - self-pride - and as the Bible says pride goeth before the fall. And we woke up one day to realize that El Generico was so busy going to Jersey and Philly and especially Kalifornia that he was no longer staying in Montreal to wrestle. That we muttered darkly, selfishly, was the first betrayal.
When El Generico OLE! kicked Beef Wellington in the face, we watched our creation turn solidly not just against Beef Wellington, but against us - the IWS fans. This was the real betrayal.
So, I have mixed feelings going into October 29th. On one had there is the affection that I have for El Generico, a wrestler who is connected with the IWS fans in a way that no other wrestler is. (As I wrote about HERE!) On the other hand, there is that moment in Frankenstein, when Viktor finds one of the victims of the Monster and Viktor has a Choice. It's the Old Yeller choice. Do you allow your affection for your old friend to blind you from the fact that he has gone bad? Or do you honour all that was good by sending your old friend to a better place?
Like say... Germany?
This is probably as good a time as any to mention that El Generico has been invited back to Germany to perform for wXw in Essen, Germany. On November 12th, he will wrestle against Emil Sitochi in a rematch of a match held in IWA-MS which El Generico won if memory serves. El Generico's match for November 13th hasn't been announced yet.
On October 29th at Devil's Night in Montreal, I will put a stake through the heart of my affection for El Generico and I will boo the last Spic traitor like the back-stabbing little duplicitous wet-back that he is. But until October 29th, if you will permit me, I would like to take one small instant to remember El Generico in better times...
...
...
...
Also, I should just mention, as will become obvious...
Verily, I did readest too much Mighty Thor as a kid.
When We Were Marks
How El Generico Earned His Cape
HEARKEN!
Gather round and pay heed
to Mighty Volstagg of the Warriors Three!
Fill my flagon with golden mead
and I shall tell you such a tale
as wouldst make e'en the Grim Hogun merry.
I warn you this is no tale of the Warriors Three.
Nor a tale of the Gods and Heroes of Asgard.
For if the Mighty Thor has taught us nought,
It is that you weak short-lived mortals from Midgard
Are capable of amazing feats of bravery and strength.
After all, who is more brave - he who feels no fear?
Or the scared mortal who confronts his fears?
KNOW!
That there was in that time,
A masked wrestler dubbed El Generico.
On the eve of his first match,
He was handed his mask and told,
"Tonight, you face NT of the T,
And Lo! He is sorely vexed.
No doubt he will beat and abuse you,
and take advantage of your youth.
If you live, we have plans for you,
So wear this mask that the crowd
Will accept you better later on...
If you live."
NOTE WELL!
He were s’pposed to wrestle
But the one time
And then disappear.
Only in that first match
Didst the brave El Generico cry:
OLE!
And the crowd didst respond:
OLE!
And the NT of T was sorely vexed
And didst so abuse El Generico
That the crowd didst call e'en louder:
OLE!
The vicious NT of T became so vexed
Upon hearing the crowd cry:
OLE!
That he didst Pillmanize El Generico's neck
And then in a rare fury he left the ring
While El Generico didst twitch and drool
The NT of T didst yell at the official
Instructing him to count to ten
And doing so, the official didst give
The victory to El Generico.
The brave masked wrestler was
Carried to the back.
Where he was grabbed and told,
"You doth realize that you are now
Stuck with the mask?"
FORSOOTH!
El Generico was indeed stuck with the mask
But also stuck on the road to victory.
He didst aid the Los Latinos to emerge triumphant
Against NT of T and his heavy friend Maxx Fury
Winning a rare victory by DQ.
El Generico didst also beat PCP Crazy F'N Manny
In a retirement match that didst end Manny's career.
And he didst vanquish both Latino brothers
In a Lucha Libre three-way that was considered
a triumph for all three men.
And as his victories mounted, El Generico didst
Find himself propelled to the main event
And found himself allied with a proud Nubian
Called by all - Onyx of the Dru.
Now this Onyx had for many months pursued
That Golden Belt with which grapplers
Were named Champions and the best.
But another masked wrestler held that belt
And kept it just out of the reach of this Onyx.
This Masked Phantom, Green in colour
And Envious by nature didst refuse to face Onyx.
But choosing as his partner the strong man
Steve of the Royds, the Phantom Green didst
Challenge Onyx saying,
"Brother, pick your partner and if thou art
Able to vanquish Royds and Me,
You will have your title shot.
Pick any man, so long as he is El Generico."
And El Generico was sore afraid.
But he could not refuse a hero such as Onyx,
So he prepared for the bout
As best he could and prepared to face
The Phantom Green and Steve of the Royds.
During this fight, El Generico was much abused.
And Onyx was sorely vexed.
For the Phantom Green didst provoke Onyx
But also, note well, avoid him.
It so happened that the referee of the match
Was PCP Crazy F'N Manny
And this strange and dangerous man didst so conspire
That Steve of the Royds was pinned by El Generico
And Manny jumped on El Generico's back to keep
Steve of the Royds pinned to the mat
And didst count to three while so pinning Steve
Giving Onyx his chance to win the title.
Time passed and Steve of the Royds stoked
His rage as men keepeth a fire burning
(As doest our landlord here
Keeping us warm as the wind howls outside.
Fill my flagon with beer
For surely this telling of tales is thirsty work.)
The next meet of grappling to be held
Were called Know Your Enemies
And surely El Generico and Steve of the Royds
Didst know each other as enemies.
Now El Generico found himself grappling
With a Suicidal Youth with the initials K squared
One half of the tag team champions was he.
His partner being busy grappling with
Latino Mysterio upon whose bony teenage ass
His hand he didst break
A Trans Meta Carpal Fracture.
Or so said the physics who on the broken hand attended.
El Generico found himself battling not one man but three
As the Special K times two didst
Call on his partner and their lurking Ogre
Who from Florida didst hail.
But El Generico didst emerge triumphant
When Steve of the Royds came to his aid.
This was passing strange,
That an enemy would so rescue him.
But Steve of the Royds was quick to explain
Later that night, El Generico would grapple
A second time against the strongest man
For miles around - that is to say Steve of the Royds.
And El Generico was sore afraid.
Also tired, for he had grappled with great energy
Against that Double K of the Five on High
Still El Generico didst gird himself for the battle
And fatigued was nonetheless quick as
Steve of the Royds was strong.
Thus Steve found to his peril
The saying true:
Thou wouldst skin a fleet woodland creature?
First, thou must catch it.
So desperately, El Generico didst avoid
Steve of the Royds great swings
Whilst still stinging the great brute
Like a bee stinging a great bear
And thus to the great joy of the crowd
Didst El Generico topple the giant
And claim victory.
Now it didst so happen that Steve of the Royds
Came to the ring with a golden cape
And having lost to this smaller, quicker man
The heart of the giant was filled with shame.
Taking this golden cape from his shoulders,
Steve of the Royds hung it upon El Generico saying,
"You are more deserving of this cape than I shall ever be.
Wear it and remember that you won it by beating a giant.
I am putting away my boots and hanging up my weight belt
Until such a time that I am needed again."
And El Generico didst wear this golden cape
And with great joy didst cry:
OLE!
And the joyful crowd didst cry in reply:
OLE!
And this is how El Generico Earned His Cape.
Now if you forgive Noble Volstagg,
The fire of our generous landlord
Doth cause my eyes to droop
And sleep doth beckon me to her arms.
-
Don't you mean that you are the mini-me to his Dr. Evil?
****************************************
The interesting thing about that review is that we are bugged by the same things:
-Too many singles matches in a row
-Puzzling booking/ordering of the matches
(in my case, too much heel/heel and face/face matches)
-Upper card that was much better than the lower card
He seems much angrier about it than I was though. For me a great main event makes up for a lot, I suppose.
Glass Half-Full/Glass Half-Empty
-
Good job on the report though. I reccomend RavishingRickRudo's report for another (albeit negative) analysis of the UWA.Linkage?
-
While I was in Toronto on vacation visiting my sister, I had the chance to check out a show put on by UWA Hardcore Wrestling, the home fed of Chris Bishop and Lionel Knight. Here is what I saw and here is what I thought.
When We Were Marks
They Done Kilt Osiris!
UWA Hardcore Wrestling – Friday, September 30th, 2005
St John’s Hall, Mississauga, Ontario, CANADA
For some odd reason UWA Hardcore Wrestling does not name their shows.
When you enter St John’s Hall, after paying your ticket, you will find yourself in an elevated balcony area, which for purposes of clarity I will call the Lower Balcony. You descend about five steps into the main hall, which is a square with a canteen running almost the full length of the left side of the square. A stage runs almost the full length of the back part of the square. The wrestlers come out from a curtain that runs the length of the stage, through a rectangular cage onto a ramp that extends to the ring.
A ring barrier made of a metallic blue mesh surrounds the ring. During the evening, the fans in the front row would bang on this mesh making a loud tinny noise that is unique to this promotion, I think. The ramp between the stage and the ring leaves enough room for a timekeeper’s table inside the ring barrier and one row of seats between the stage and the ring barrier.
On the other three sides of the ring (on the night I was there) there were five rows of fifteen chairs with room for more. The lower balcony had two rows of about twenty-five chairs. There was also an upper balcony that ran along the three sides of the square facing the stage with about fifty chairs. The night I was there all the chairs were filled, so doing the math, there were about 350 fans in attendance, a very good number for an Ontario Indy show.
Attached to the balcony on the left and the right were UWA signs done in a Japanese style, while above the stage was a large UWA sign done with a Phoenix emerging from the “UWA” Just in front of the Lower Balcony is a platform for the hard-cam that tapes the show. The hard-cam operator has a great view of the action but doesn’t cut off anyone’s view.
The lighting is subdued, neither garishly bright like many community centres or gyms and neither too low that you can’t see the action. Also there are no basketball rims or other odd distractions to remind you that the hall is used for other functions.
On the whole, it is one of the best combinations of venue and set-up that I have seen in any Indy. Not too downscale that you are afraid to enter, not so upscale that wrestling seems out of place. In many ways, it seems that the hall was designed for wrestling.
Yeah, yeah, yeah… Can we stop gushing and start talking about the matches already?
OZ?
Congratulations moron, you can recognize your own roommate.
Ladies and Gentlemen, my roommate and colour commentator, the Great and Mighty OZ. The only thing is, OZ, you weren’t at the UWA show, how can you do colour commentary?
As always, Llakor, you are logical, precise… and completely wrong. I was in fact at the UWA show that weekend. I came up to see the Blue Jays final two games of the year and took the chance to see Bishop and Knight performing on their home turf.
Why didn’t I see you then?
Because I was AVOIDING you, you chump.
Oh, I see. I know that I am going to regret this, but why exactly were you avoiding me?
I like to think of your two-week vacation from Montreal as a two-week vacation for me from having you around the apartment. Just because we share some interests like say wrestling and we share the apartment doesn’t mean that I have to like you.
Knew that I was going to regret asking…
As Llakor said, I’m his colour commentator. His Booby Heenan to Llakor’s… hmmm… Gorilla Mansoon was too good, let’s say Sean Mooney.
Would you stop?
No. Now, the main reason that I take time from the life that I have - as opposed to Llakor’s non-life – is that unlike Llakor, I don’t work for the IWS and thus I don’t feel compelled to kiss ass all the time.
I prefer to think of it as being polite and showing respect.
You say “Potato” and I say “Bull-Shit!”
With that in mind, here are the things about St John’s Hall that Llakor did not mention:
1. It’s in the middle of nowhere. If Mississauga is the ass-end of Toronto, St-John’s Hall is in the deserted ass-end of Mississauga. I mean it’s somewhat decorative tucked away like it is, but it does tend to limit your customer’s to those who own a car or who can cage a lift.
2. All the chairs at St-John’s Hall are the hard plastic shell chairs. Worst possible chairs for a wrestling show. Best are folding metal. Second best are folding plastic.
3. The show could really use a projector and giant screen. There is plenty of room to put a screen on the stage. There is also plenty of room to attach a projector to the hard-cam. Especially when the action spills out of the ring (which happens often) it would give the fans a better chance to see exactly what is going on. Plus, having a screen and projector set-up would allow you…
4. No Hi-Lite Reel? Trash. Look, the only thing that distinguishes a fed from a spot show is ongoing storylines. And you need to plug in your new fans who just showed up into those storylines. The way that you do that is by playing something before the show to update people on what happened previously.
5. Ring Barriers. Any fan of the IWS is a big hater on ring barriers, and I am no different. On the other hand, the noise that the fans make banging on that blue steel mesh is pretty cool, so I am going to give them the benefit of the doubt on the ring barriers.
6. The long metal cage that the wrestlers emerge from is very damn cool as well.
Finished? Those are some pretty small nits that you’re picking there.
I calls them like I sees them.
Well that brings us round to the first match of the evening…
Dark Match: Spike Hammer vs. Devin Parkside
Spike Hammer weighs in at 310 pounds.
Devin Parkside is 168 pounds dripping wet.
And they should both be slowly fed to sharks feet first.
Someone has overdosed on their Hate-A-Rade a little, I see. The disparity in weights of these two guys reminds me of a little something.
Danger! Will Robinson! Danger! Lengthy digression ahead!
Hard as it is to believe, there was a time, once, when Sean Waltman was the best cruiserweight in the world.
CRAP! Sucked in again. What in the blue hell are you raving about? The man from whom we developed the term “X-Pac heat” from? The original “I don’t give a heaping shit about you. Get the hell out of the ring!” guy? I date Triple H’s cast-offs? That Sean Waltman?
Yep.
Sean Waltman was tearing up Minnesota as “The Lightning Kid” when the WWE contacted him and offered him a contract. They brought him in - this skinny, lightning-fast cruiser - pulling off moves that no one in the WWF would even attempt. Completely the opposite of the regular WWF roster. Naturally, when they bring him in, they turn him into a skinny jobber and further bury him by changing his freaking name every single match that he is in. I mean, an incredibly entertaining jobber, but a jobber nonetheless.
Then Waltman is facing Razor Ramon, he’s still wearing the “Lightning Kid” pants even though the WWF has long since tossed the name. It’s obvious that Waltman is going to lose, only he doesn’t. He beats Ramon clean, 1-2-3 and just like that he has a name – The 1-2-3 Kid and he has a feud with the stunned and pissed-off Razor Ramon and he has a fan-base as wrestling fans all over the world freak out that this guy that they were sort of fond of has suddenly gained some credibility.
That one match made both men’s careers. Humbled by his losses to the 1-2-3 Kid, Razor Ramon turned face and eventually became the Inter-Continental champion… which led to a feud with Shawn Michaels… which led to a certain famous ladder match. Sean Waltman, on the other hand, was established as a guy who was so fast that he had a chance to beat damn near anyone in the WWE.
Oh wait a minute, I know where this is going. There is a certain tape in your library…
Yes. Back in the day, Coliseum Video had the bright idea to do a “Fans Request” tape. And not just any fans but Canadian fans, and Canadian fans being both smart and yet completely insane…
Not to mention cruel…
Not to mention cruel.
One of the matches requested was Sean Waltman, the 1-2-3 Kid against…
YOKOZUNA!
The late, great Yokozuna. Now going in, you know how this match is going to end. Yokozuna catches the 1-2-3 Kid, sits on him and kills him. The only question is how long can the Kid stave off the inevitable. The match begins with the 1-2-3 Kid trying to at least knock Yokozuna off his feet, because that at least would be a moral victory. This as you could imagine takes some doing and the Kid starts pulling out moves like you have never seen just to try and knock the monster down. Yokozuna for his part is doing everything that he can just to catch the little bugger and while he manages to knock the Kid off his feet a few times, the Kid is just too fast to catch. The Kid finally gets his moral victory of Knocking Yokozuna off his feet after a series of kicks from every conceivable angle and direction.
And at this point the commentators who I think are Johnny Polo and Todd Pettingale, shift into high gear and without talking about cardio or anything like that begin pointing out that the longer the match goes the better it is for the 1-2-3 Kid, because Waltman has the cardio of a triathlete (before there were triathlons) while Yokozuna is a great athlete and all and a former champion… but he has the cardio…
Of a big fat whale, which he is.
Right, and the longer the match goes the more that you believe that it is possible that something miraculous could happen. And Yokozuna is looking winded, and then the 1-2-3 Kid makes one teensy tiny mistake…
And the big Samoan catches him, sits on him and kills him.
Right. Now the reason that Sean Waltman at this exact moment was the greatest cruiserweight in the world, is because he could make you believe for a brief shining moment, against the evidence of your eyes, against logic and against everything that you knew about wrestling that he could beat Yokozuna. I mean, it was never, ever going to happen, but making you believe that it was possible, that takes art.
Great, great match.
Spike Hammer vs. Devin Parkside, on the other hand, is not a great match. Oh the moves were mostly well executed and the crowd was into it, but the construction of the match, the story of the match was bad to offensive. Of course, this was a dark match, which means that by definition the two guys in it were a little green…
Now don’t back down now. These two guys need to be tyed to a set of train-tracks and run over by a freight going five miles an hour or slower if possible.
Look, you just don’t start a match between two guys this different in size with the two men fighting over an arm-bar. Or if you do, the big man needs to make the arm-bars big and exaggerated like he is trying to rip the little guy’s arm out of his socket so that he can beat him to death with it.
The thing about a big man vs. little man match is that there are still a number of stories that you can tell. The little man maybe faster, he may be a better technician or he can be a bigger, crueler son-of-a-bitch, which I guess was the story that they were trying to go for here. But Devin Parkside is neither cruel enough nor stiff enough to pull that story off. Or at least he does not appear cruel enough or stiff enough which amounts to the same thing.
Also, if you were trying to go that route, why in hell is it Spike Hammer who is hitting Devin Parkside with Damian’s “Das Boot” and Viking’s Running Back Bump one right after the other?
Not to wear your influences on your sleeve or anything…
ATTENTION Devin Parkside: When a 300 pound man runs, flips and sits on your chest, try to SELL IT for at least a moment will you? Instead of doing Super Dragon’s Curb Stomp within a few seconds instead? I mean the match should have ALREADY been over by then.
ATTENTION Spike Hammer: You’re 300 pounds. Try to act like it.
And then the wrong person wins as Devin Parkside catches Spike Hammer with a surprise roll-up around the twelve minute mark.
The match was too long. Parkside got away with way too much. The wrong guy won. Parkside didn’t sell for moves that should have killed him. Both men swiped moves from wrestlers who perform them better. Am I missing anything?
I don’t think so.
No, no, one final thing.
ATTENTION Devin Parkside: Eat a fucking Sandwich or something. You look like Kate Moss’ emaciated brother. I mean I come from Quebec where it seems like every freaking wrestler is lean, but at least they have swimmer’s bodies, slim but athletic and well defined. You look like you would turn invisible if you turned sideways. Eat a cracker for fuck’s sakes.
I think we should move on…
Joe E. Slick opened the show by announcing that Ultimo Dragon was coming to the UWA on January 13th. He also dropped some hints about Digital TV and encouraged everyone to sign up to Rogers. Finally, he directed everyone’s attention to a silent auction that UWA was running to help pay to replace the two teeth that Sexxxy Eddy lost during a UWA show.
The first match of the show:
Match #1: Rip Impact & Prodigy vs. Snap Dragon & Ghemma
Referee Trevor Rutherford
Rip Impact & Prodigy weigh in at 356 pounds.
Snap Dragon & Ghemma weigh in at 309 pounds.
Impact and Prodigy win after about ten minutes of crowd pleasing, high flying action.
What are you stoned? The moves were sloppy and the transitions were non-existant. There were points in the match where the wrestlers were literally standing in the middle of the ring waiting for their opponents to recover so that their opponents could go on the offence. Once these guys figure out that it’s not the high-risk moves that you make, its how you get there, they will be a thousand times better. Make me believe guys.
Match#2: Nick Watts vs. Matt Bison
Referee Theo Jones
The Black Jabroni accompanied Nick Watts. Didn’t hear the weight, but around 200 something?
Matt Bison weighed in at 170 pounds.
One of the few straight up face vs. heel matches on the night. Matt Bison won with a roll-up after about 13 minutes of action. Both men played well to the crowd.
Transitions were sloppy although better than in the tag match. The Black Jabroni didn’t really seem to serve much purpose being out there. The bit where Nick Watts called Matt Bison, “M. Bison” was pretty cool. And I liked the Heimlich bit that Bison did on Watts. Otherwise match was the definition of mediocrity. Not bad, not good, just there.
Match#3: Dan Paysan vs. Jeff Flury
Jeff Flury beat Dan Paysan after about 14 minutes in a contest between two heels. Now either Dan is much better at heeling up a crowd than Flury, or the crowd decided to cheer the hometown ass-hole over the out-of-town ass-hole.
Dan was great and Jeff Fleury stayed with him every step of the way.
I have to tell you it was a huge relief to see Dan Paysan come out and know that I was in good hands. Because until this point, I was not a big fan of the show. And I will grudgingly admit that this was no carry job, Jeff Flury can handle himself in the ring. Like Llakor, I was a little confused how much the crowd was willing to cheer for a member of the PWA who are supposed to be the despised faction in the UWA.
Match#4: The Amazing Darkstone vs. Beef Wellington
Referee Bakais
Comedy GOLD. The match was built around Beef’s inability to satisfy the ladies owing to an embarrassing episode of erectile dysfunction. Beef ended up winning after about eleven minutes with a Package Pile Driver to become the Number One Contender to the UWA Canadian Championship.
Loved the fact that Beef stole Kevin Steen’s finisher because he’s involved in a feud with Steen. Great balloon animal spot. Only in a Beef Wellington match could you even say that. There was a cool banana peel spot although, to me, Darkstone didn’t build to the spot properly. The Irish Whips around the ring that exhausted both men was very funny.
I think I should take this chance to talk about Bakais. The UWA message board seems a little split on Bakais with some feeling that Bakais is awesome…
And correctly so…
While there are those who believe that Bakais draws too much attention to himself and takes attention away from the wrestlers. Here is what I believe: A good referee is like punctuation. He directs your attention to what is important and helps you interpret the match. So when Bakais is puzzled, he has the same purpose as a question mark; when he is excited – an exclamation mark; when both men are down and he is counting them out – an ellipse… and so on.
The genius of Bakais is that you could follow an entire match just by watching him and have a fairly good idea what was going on, the same way that when Cal Ripken Jr. was still playing that you could understand a game of baseball by watching how Cal Ripken Jr. positioned himself before each play. Ozzie Smith, Ripken’s great contemporary, used to use his great range and athleticism to get to where the ball was to make the play. Cal, on the other hand, used his knowledge of his pitcher and the opposing batter to put himself into position to make the play without needing to move.
Bakais’ ability to interpret the match for you is especially useful when the action ranges out of the ring and you can no longer see the wrestlers. Almost always, you can get a very good idea what is going on just by watching Bakais’ body language.
I would just like to add that the Amazing Darkstone has GAY PANTS!
This led to an intermission.
Match#5: Lionel Knight vs. Sabian
Referee Theo Jones
Lionel Knight was announced at 165 pounds.
Ruckus and Robbie Mireno accompanied Sabian to ringside.
Great, great high-flying match. Lionel Knight won after about eighteen minutes.
Yes, it was a great match, but their match at Hardcore Heat was just that much better. Partly, I think because at Hardcore Heat it was a straight up heel vs. face match. Lionel Knight evened the series with Sabian at one win apiece, but I really think Sabian should have won because he’s awesome and Lionel Knight is just very good.
Match#6: Chris Bishop vs. Blade
International Wrestling Syndicate Canadian Championship
Referee Bakais
Chris Bishop weighs in at 183 pounds.
Blaze weighs in at 168 pounds.
INSANE. In an IWS environment, it seems like Chris Bishop is a pure wrestler who does the odd top rope dive to mix things up. Then you seem him in the UWA hardcore environment and it becomes crystal clear that Chris Bishop is clinically out of his freaking mind. These two men did their absolute best to kill each other, taking bumps on piles of those rigid plastic chairs, taking dives off the top rope, the lower balcony and the camera platform. For their efforts, they got two huge “Please Don’t Die!” chants.
Two things.
First, the IWS is incredibly lucky to have a guy like Chris Bishop defending their Canadian Championship. I mean he doesn’t even have the belt since Kid Kamikaze stole it, but he still walks out ready to defend the title, with the attitude that if you want to become the Canadian Champion, you will literally have to kill him to do it.
Second, this is exactly the kind of match that old-school fans and UWA haters point to when they talk about matches where wrestlers kick out of everything and it’s all new fangled and we can’t take the CHANGE!
But… if you can’t watch this match and enjoy it… you might seriously want to schedule yourself for an operation to have the stick removed from your ass.
A quick mention of the UWA crowd. They are a great crowd. There is a real family atmosphere. Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves. All the matches got good heat, even a couple that weren’t all that good. They don’t seem to make as much noise as an IWS crowd at their loudest, but the noise lasts longer and is more continuous if that makes sense. They also are a little more respectful of the wrestler’s efforts, where the IWS crowd is a little more demanding.
We should probably mention how the match ended, because the ending was both disappointing and yet brilliant.
Blade seemed on the point of victory – he had just dragged Chris Bishop back to the ring – when Josh Prohibition appeared out of nowhere and clobbered Bishop with a kendo stick to give Chris Bishop the victory by DQ after about twenty-one minutes.
Blade actually seemed in control for most of the match. Great ending because you can go back to the Blade/Bishop match-up later. Josh Prohibition gets tons of heat both for attacking the beloved Bishop and for ending a great match early.
I think that I would also like to say that Chris Bishop is the best Ontario Indy wrestler that I have seen. The only two guys that even come close are James Champagne and Kobra Kai, and neither of those two guys have Bishop’s pure technical ability or his high-flying daredevil attitude. Kobra Kai has a slight edge because he has one of the cooler masks that I have ever seen and he is usually paired with the ridiculous hot Chantelle.
Chantelllllllle…
Oh yeah I forgot, Llakor is to Chantelle as Homer Simpson is to a Donut.
Chantelle with a Donut…
All right, knock it off! That’s just creepy.
I should probably mention that in UWA, Chris Bishop is announced as the “Aerial Assassin” an incredibly cool nickname.
Well deserved, too.
Josh Prohibition called out Osiris for their match for the UWA Light Heavyweight Title.
Match#7: Josh Prohibition vs. Osiris
This was no match. This was a mugging.
After Josh Prohibition called out Osiris, Osiris’ music hit and Josh Prohibition braced for him to come charging out of the long metal cage. The music built and built and just when you are thinking, “Man, Josh Prohibition is an idiot, Osiris is going to come out of the crowd and kick his ass!”
Osiris comes out of the crowd to kick his ass.
At which point, Josh Prohibition begs for his life… until every single damn member of the PWA jump Osiris from behind with kendo sticks and they beat on him and beat on him and beat on him and beat on him.
It was glorious. It was violent. It was unrestrained. It was uncensored. It was too damn much and then it kept going. I loved it.
Yeah if they could make that beatdown into a pill, Ole Anderson would use it as a Viagra substitute.
What ended the mugging was the twitchy Black Jabroni going all superfied Tourettic on us and ripping his outfit off to reveal the Blue Jabroni underneath. Crowd goes nuts and the PWA bailed.
Now, here is where knowing something about the PWA history would have helped. As far as I can tell, the Blue Jabroni is a psychotic hardcore midget. I don’t really understand why the PWA ran for their lives. I mean they out-numbered him by what four to one? Possibly five to one because the Blue Jabroni kept hitting himself in the head with a kendo stick, so even the Blue Jabroni was against the Blue Jabroni. And Osiris wasn’t getting up to help…
Yeah, the PWA they done kilt Osiris. They Done Kilt Osiris Dead.
Actually, I should admit that I thought that Joe E. Slick and the Blue Jabroni were the same guy, but that got disproved when Joe E. Slick and Brian the Guppie came to the ring to help Osiris after the PWA guys fled. They ended up having to bring first a spinal collar to the ring and then turn a table into a makeshift hard stretcher to get Osiris out of the ring and take him to the hospital.
Angle, beatdown, aftermath, all incredibly well done. I especially liked the fact that Josh Prohibition lured Osiris in by pretending to fall for the "Baby Face coming from the crowd" trick. Turning an ambush into a counter-ambush. Pretty slick.
Yeah kudos. The whole thing is on the level of – I don’t care if it was a shoot or not, I just want more.
Speaking of shoots, I just realized why you were avoiding me.
I think we established that it’s because I hate you.
Nope, besides that. See, I got into a dust up with someone over on the Ontario Indy Message Board run by Emanuel Melo. One of these hypocritical little worms that drive me nuts. I mean I understand when someone says – I saw the show and I hated it and here’s why. I understand when someone says I don’t go that promotion and here’s why. What I object to are people saying on Monday – I haven’t been to the UWA in a year. And on Wednesday saying that the UWA hasn’t had a good show in a year and every show is the same. So I blew up at this guy and gave him both barrels.
What part of : “Don’t Feed the Trolls!” do you not understand?
Fair Point. Anyway, for some odd reason, Aaron Weiss of the Pro Wrestling Superstars pay-per-views decided to stir the pot by calling me a “Five Foot Five, Middle-Aged Virgin who is a glorified Coffee-Maker for the IWS”
Right and you corrected him by pointing out you were Five Foot Four. A rare good line from you.
Thank You.
Of course, once my height is revealed the troll starts threatening physical violence. I invited him to look me up at the UWA show and told him to look for the hobbit in the red Spidey shirt.
To be fair, with that beard, you’re more like an anorexic dwarf in a red Spidey shirt.
Anyway, he threatened to beat me senseless and didn’t even show up. But that’s not the point. The reason that you were avoiding me is that you didn’t want to be caught in the middle of a brawl if he did show up.
Well…
Busted!
All right, yes, I was avoiding you in case the troll showed up. But not I hasten to add from fear. I was just worried that if I found myself in the middle of the brawl, I would miss the spectacle of you getting your ass kicked for shooting your mouth off.
I hate you.
Ditto.
Match#8: Ruckus vs. M-Dogg 20
UWA Hardcore Wrestling Canadian Championship Match
Referee Theo Jones
M-Dogg 20 is the UWA Hardcore Wrestling Canadian Champion. He weighs in at 177 pounds.
Robbie Mireno and Sabian accompany Ruckus to the ring. Ruckus is the Combat Zone Wrestling Heavyweight champion. He is carrying the massively cool red leather CZW belt with him.
M-Dogg 20 gets massively streamered which annoys Ruckus a bit as Ruckus feels left out.
I think at this point the best way to explain this match is to go back to the Ontario Indy Message Board and quote from one of the Intramet Experts who predicted what we should expect from this match.
markuskfabian
« Reply #1 on Sept 29, 2005, 6:40pm »
“OF ALL THE PEOPLE TO BRING IN, WHY BLACKOUT ?!
I have yet to see a good Ruckus match. Come to think of it; no psychology. kicking out of 200 finishing moves each match.
He's PERFECT for UWA!”
For the record, according to my notes Ruckus kicked out exactly once. See, this is what happens when you make assumptions about a wrestler’s ability to adapt to the needs of the match or the needs of a promotion.
Will you stop paying attention to the fricking trolls? If you ignore them they shrivel up and die!
Let’s talk about this match which was so much better than you could even imagine.
Amazingly awesome. The first portion of the match was built on a “Can you top this?” format culminating in a memorable sequence on the stage where both men demonstrated their ability to run up walls and M-Dogg 20 pulled out his flagpole stunt which had obviously been scouted by Ruckus.
And you could also see there suddenly that every other match had been warned not to use the stage so that when Ruckus and M-Dogg 20 used it that it was fresh and new.
Yeah, this wasn’t really a hardcore match as such although the two men ranged over and across and back and forth. The story being told was of two men who knew of each other, who respected each other and who perceived each other as equals. Both men determined to hit that one devastating move that would give them the pin. As a result, for most of the match the two men weren’t even trying for pin falls because they didn’t believe that they had hit their opponent with enough to keep them down. This is why I quoted from the twat from the message board because the match was completely the opposite from what he described was going to happen.
Ruckus had more pin attempts on M-Dogg 20 than M-Dogg 20 on Ruckus. (Five according to my notes.) Largely this was because Ruckus dominated the match, but every time that Ruckus went for a finisher, M-Dogg 20 managed just barely not to be there when the finisher landed.
Ruckus came off very strong in this match. M-Dogg 20 came off as equal to Ruckus technically, maybe not quite as strong, but very smart. It was hard to tell if M-Dogg was escaping Ruckus’ finishers by the skin of his teeth or whether he was luring Ruckus into attempting the finishers so that he could escape from it and get the advantage on Ruckus.
Whether it was from desperation or design, the one thing that was clear is that it was throwing Ruckus off his game as the CZW Champion seemed to want to be certain that M-Dogg 20 would stay down to be hit by a finisher. As a result, he passed up a number of possible pin attempts. Giving up the possibility of a win for the guarantee of a sure thing. And eventually, after about twenty-one minutes, M-Dogg 20 was able to take advantage of that and get the win.
A bit of a shocking result to be honest as I was hardly expecting to see the CZW champion get pinned.
great, Great, GREAT match. One that obviously pushed M-Dogg 20 to his limits and yet at the same point watching it, you would almost think that he planned the match and that like say Ali with Foreman in the Rumble in the Jungle, M-Dogg 20 let Ruckus push too hard and then took advantage.
Let me tell you how good this match was. This match was so good that photographer Emanuel Melo got so excited that rushing to get a good shot of the action, he ran smack into a post and busted hisself open the hard way.
Heh. Yeah which prompted a “Melo’s Bleeding” chant and confused the hell out of Sabian, who was trying to figure out if “Melo” was some weird nickname for M-Dogg 20, only he wasn’t bleeding.
After the match, the UWA fans climbed into the ring to celebrate, reenacting that ECW moment, except fortunately for the collapsing ring bit. Great show, started slow, but from the moment Dan Paysan came out everything else was good to great, with an amazing main event.
Yeah, the under card of UWA is weak, or if you prefer, green. Fortunately, they have Chris Bishop to fall back on, who is the best wrestler in Ontario. And while their champion, M-Dogg 20, may come to Ontario from away, he is an exciting and underexposed talent.
I think that you are being too hard on the under card. In any case, I enjoyed myself tremendously and I can’t wait to go back.
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Hello class and welcome back from your Summer Vacations. I would like to thank Professors Meltzer and Zimmerman and RASMUSSEN~! for allowing me the privilege of presenting my essay first.
For those who haven't heard of me before, I'm Llakor, the Head Writer/Publicist/SHILL~!/Bottle-Washer for the IWS. We are based out of Montreal, Quebec, CANADA. Formed in 1999 as the World Wrestling Syndicate, re-named in 2001 as the Internet Wrestling Syndicate, re-named in late 2004 as the International Wrestling Syndicate.
The IWS is considered in Canada to be one of the biggest and most influential feds. We are the first Canadian fed to have its own PPV in Canada. We are the Canadian fed where CHIKARA made its Canadian debut. We are the Canadian fed where Sid Vicious chose to make his return to active wrestling.
You will have heard of Sexxxy Eddy who is almost a bigger star in Philadelphia than he is in Montreal. You will also have heard of El Generico and Kevin Steen who are big stars for Pro Wrestling Guerilla in California. El Generico is the PWG Tag Team champion with the Human Tornado. Ironically, the Generic Luchador, the proverbial "Red-Headed Mexican", born in Tijuana but living in Montreal, El Generico is more popular in California than many luchadors who live in California (or just across the border.) Kevin Steen is currently the PWG Champion having beaten A. J. Styles for the belt.
There are many other IWS stars who are ready to break-out as stars in the U.S. since Quebec is a hot-bed of amazing talent.
Anyway, without further ado, here is my Back to (OLD) School essay entitled "The IWS - What We Did During Our Summer Vacation"
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The IWS - What We Did During Our Summer Vacation
A When We Were Marks Photo Essay
Part One of Two
We Went to Philadelphia
Sexxxy Eddy wins the IWS Title in Philly
IWS - Philadelphia: Freedom to Fight
Viking Hall, Philadelphia, July 9th, 2005
The IWS continued to break new ground over the summer, becoming the first Canadian promotion ever to be invited to put on a show in the historic ECW Arena - Viking Hall - in Philadelphia. I told people leading up to it that it was like a musician being asked to perform at Carnegie Hall. We came to make history and we did.
I should however address a few controversies that happened along the way.
The Card
We made a conscious decision going into Philadelphia: Freedom to Fight that we would do an IWS show. Our roster, no special guests, a show exactly like we would have done in Montreal. There are many guests that we could have invited, but our feeling was - succeed or fail - let's do OUR show in Viking Hall.
The Attendance
The consensus seems to be that the attendance was 150, which is probably the first time in wrestling history that a wrestling crowd was under-reported in the history of wrestling. We know that we sold more tickets than that and Enzo's count at the half-way point was higher. But not to argue the collected wisdom of the Internet... Let me just say - We were happy with the attendance. Don't get me wrong, you always want more. And the perception that the attendance was disappointing is really a compliment to us, because we have been exceeding expectations from Day One.
Still, ask any fed outside of Philadelphia, if they would be happy coming to Viking Hall, putting on a show in the ECW Arena and drawing between 150-200 people, whether they would do it or not, and they would probably be packing their bags before you even finished the question. Besides the key for us? 150 Yankees paying in US Dollars? And buying our DVDs with US Dollars? For Canadians, that's like a crowd of 300 people, especially since the cheapest ticket in Viking Hall was more expensive than the most expensive ticket at a Montreal IWS show BEFORE THE EXCHANGE RATE! So we did okay.
The Green Phantom vs. Kurt Lauderdale
The controversy that erupted over the ending to this match seems a little sad and besides the point, but at the time people were outraged that Manny stopped the match because "The Pennsylvania Athletic Commission thought it was too violent!"
Well, it was a classic case of miscommunication.
Here is what happened.
Before the show, Maven Bentley (whose license we were using. THANKS MAVEN!) gave us the briefing on what we could and couldn't do. What it boiled down to was that you could fight in the crowd or you could bleed in the ring, BUT you couldn't bleed in the crowd.
Naturally, five seconds into the Kurt/Phantom match and Kurt is bleeding.
Now you have to understand that the Green Phantom is a born natural crosser of borders. Never, ever, EVER, draw a line in the sand with him 'cause he will cross over that line as easy as breathing.
Lauderdale and Phantom keep the action in the ring, but keep teasing to go into the crowd. From where I am sitting I can see Manny having multiple heart-attacks. The representative of the Philadelphia State Athletic Commission gets a phone call. Manny thinks that he is PLACING a phone call and starts gesturing towards me. I try to gesture something about it being fine (I think it was something about a soccer practice to be honest.) And, because I am the worst player of charades in the entire world and because the SAC rep is getting out of his seat to head to the back... so that he can hear better, Manny becomes convinced that the entire show is about to be cancelled, which is why he ran out to stop the match. And because Manny is an ass-hole he can't even tell the truth without making it sound like a lie.
PCP Crazy F'N Manny, everybody. My Boss, Ass-Hole, Panics Easily.
Kevin Steen and El Generico Go to California Not Philly
Well, just speaking for myself personally, as I have told Kevin (and tried to tell El Generico through his translator...) as a mark for Kevin and El Generico in the IWS, I would have liked to see them in Philly doing their thing. To me it seemed like the natural conclusion of so much that we had worked towards. And to a certain extent it was our own damn fault for not giving them enough time to arrange their schedules properly.
Now having said that, if I was disappointed, Beef Wellington, on the other hand was LIVID. The unforeseen consequence of Kevin and El Generico not being in Philly was the very real end to the friendship between Kevin and Neil which lead to the stiff-fest between the two at Extreme Dream II and this month led to El Generico choosing his California running buddy over his room mate, Beef Wellington.
Speaking of unforeseen consequences...
Fred La Merveille Gets Cheered Like Mad
Philly fans are WEIRD and I'm from Montreal, I know from weird crowds. Fred comes in to French music and speaking Fremch and is so over as a heel that U-S-A chants break out for Beef Wellington. (!!!) As the match progresses, the Philly fans get so into Fred that by the end of the bout they are chanting "Please Come Back!" Fred's biggest cheer from a crowd in more than a year.
This lead oddly directly to...
The Break-Up of the SLI
Viking Accidentally Punches Fred la Merveille During the Extreme Dream Tournament
Extreme Dream I
Le Break, Montreal, July 23rd, 2005
Why Extreme Dream?
For newcomers to the IWS, Extreme Dream was the name for the tournament where we inaugurated our tag team titles. We had discussed for years adding a third title to the IWS. Given that we decided to rename ourselves the "International Wrestling Syndicate" at the end of 2004, to mark the fact that our wrestlers, our shows and our DVDs were now being featured beyond Canada, we also felt that it was appropriate to launch a Canadian title belt for IWS (and other feds) wrestlers to fight over.
To crown a new Canadian champion, we naturally decided to hold a tournament and what better name than Extreme Dream for that tournament. In terms of format, Brian the Guppie suggested that we follow the format of a "Lethal Lottery" and have a tag team format in the first round with random partners.
This led to some astonishing results...
Fred la Merveille dissolved the SLI
The SLI break-up didn't happen here, it happened at Extreme Dream II. And the break-up didn't really start here. The seeds were planted when Damian turned on Fred during Blood, Sweat and Beers 2004, costing Fred the IWS Title when he seemed on the verge of beating Kevin Steen. The Philly crowd cheering louder for Fred than the Quebec crowd further poisoned the well. But it was when Fred and Viking found themselves forced to be opponents in the first round of Extreme Dream that the cracks in the SLI really became apparent. When Viking accidentally struck Fred, la Merveille's reaction spoke volumes.
This is the show where the SLI hit the iceberg. Extreme Dream II, where Fred gave Viking a swinging pedigree from the top rope through a chair, that's just the spot where the SLI sank.
Vanessa Kraven vs. Damian
Vanessa Kraven puts the boots to Damian
In a year where Damian has pulled off some amazing matches and astonishing victories, some encounters have been somewhat overshadowed. For instance, the match pitting Damian and Kenny the Bastard against Vanessa Kraven and Takao.
(Just to interject, Fred and Viking end up booked against each other and their partnership falls apart. Kenny the Bastard and Takao's friendship seems stronger than ever.)
Vanessa Kraven was a last minute substitution for the Arsenal who seems to have gotten wind that he might end up facing Damian and "discovered" an injury to his arm. When the Philly fans got their first look at Viking's chops, there was some discussion whether there should be a scale for chops on the same line as the "Mutoh" scale for crimson masks. Vanessa's chops rate 1.5 Vikings.
There is a sad tendency amongst some (male) wrestlers to disrespect their female colleagues by wrestling them like they were made of porcelain. Call me an old school purist, call me a cranky old bastard, call me a member of the The He-Man Woman Haters Club, I don't much care. To me, you show respect to a woman wrestler by punching her in the face just as hard as you would a man. The Arsenal showed that respect to Precious Lucy (aka Lufisto); Shane Matthews showed that respect to Julie the Red Fuxx; Damian showed that respect to Vanessa Kraven.
(Of course, as Jimmy Stone could tell you, failing to respect Vanessa Kraven can get you killed. She is legendary for making grown men weep with her chops and slaps.)
The Extreme Dream DVD is worth getting just for the confrontation between these two as Vanessa tried to peel the skin off of Damian's chest and Damian - there is no better way of putting this - tried to knock Vanessa the fuck out with stiff fore-arms and punches. You call it misogyny, I call it respect.
The Rise of Kid Kamikaze
There is a tendency in the IWS for us to take certain wrestlers for granted. It takes a dramatic moment for us to look up and suddenly realize how good someone has gotten. Just such a moment happened for Kid Kamikaze at Extreme Dream.
The random nature of the first round of the tournament brought together for one night only the greatest tag team in the history of the IWS - Hi-5 - Kid Kamikaze and Beef Wellington. The break-up of Hi-5 propelled Beef Wellington to star-dom, but it was less kind to Kid Kamikaze. Never mind that at any moment he seemed capable of having the best match on any IWS card. Never mind that every month it seemed that he was breaking out a new and more painful submission variant. We overlooked him; we under-estimated him; we took him for granted; we pissed him off.
Then we saw him beside his old tag team partner, Beef Wellington, and it was as if we saw Kid Kamikaze for the first time. Beef would be the first to tell you that it was Kid Kamikaze who did most of the work in Hi-5. Now, suddenly, we saw it as well, the technique; the athleticism; the acrobatics and frankly, the utter dickishness of Kid Kamikaze compared to Beef Wellington. Here is where Kid Kamikaze captured our attention. His ongoing feud with Chris Bishop is where he will deliver on the promise that the spotlight has given him.
We Crowned Three New Champions
IWS Referee Bakais Holds Up the Hand of EXesS, the New Champ
Extreme Dream II (aka: BodyCount)
Le Break, Montreal, Aug 20th, 2005
2.0 Went to the Promised Land
Jagged Sprays Champagne While Shane Matthews Holds His Belt Up In Triumph
In some ways, it could be called the summer of 2.0. The Crown Princes of Conceit, Jagged and Shane Matthews came to Philadelphia on an "unbeaten streak" built mainly on count-out victories. In Philly, they got another count-out victory showing a vicious side taking out the Flying Hurricanes with NASTY chair-shots. Of course, titles can't change hands as a result of a count-out, so 2.0 tasted victory but ironically were denied the title belts.
At Extreme Dream I, 2.0 saw their unbeaten streak come to an end (as much as they tried to deny it later) as their team ended up randomly paired up against Hi-5 in a dream match-up for the first round of the Extreme Dream tournament. The new generation of IWS tag teams against the old.
The victory and the loss combined seemed to give Jagged and Shane extra determination for their rematch against the Flying Hurricanes. And that determination led to a victory and the most amazing celebration that I can remember in any IWS title change ever. Despite the Flying Hurricanes being popular champions, the IWS fans were drawn in by 2.0's contagious joy at finally winning the titles.
Of course, this being 2.0, we regretted being sucked in almost immediately...
Chris Bishop Becomes the First IWS Canadian Champion
While El Generico Insists That He Was Robbed, Chris Bishop Holds His Title
Of course, he didn't get to hold it for long as Kid Kamikaze ambushed Chris Bishop and stole the title before it was even unveiled.
Consider for a second what UWA Hardcore Wrestling star Chris Bishop accomplished this summer. He made his debut at IWS Scarred For Life - unheralded, unwanted, unknown. He is immediately greeted by "Who the Fuck Are You?" chants by the notoriously picky IWS fans. By the end of his first match, the IWS crowd was won over and were chanting "Please Come Back!" In the span of three shows, Chris Bishop won his first five matches, sweeping the table of the Extreme Dream tournament and became the first IWS Canadian Champion.
In the process, he beat EXesS, the current IWS champion TWICE; he beat Dan Paysan; he beat Kid Kamikaze; he beat El Generico. Every time, the crowd cheered him on, an outsider from Ontario, beating their hometown heroes including El Generico - perhaps the most popular baby-face in IWS history. He did it without cutting a single promo, winning over the IWS crowd through his wrestling ability alone.
Frankly, it is a performance that speaks for itself and that leaves me for once without a superlative to mark it.
EXesS and Sexxxy Eddy - Mirror Opposites
IWS Referee Bakais Holds the Ladder While EXesS and Sexxxy Eddy Battle
This Summer saw Sexxxy Eddy finally accomplish an IWS milestone and end years of frustration becoming the first-ever three time IWS champion. Appropriately, he did so in Philadelphia where Eddy is even more beloved than he is in Montreal. EXesS satisfied his own frustrations finally winning the IWS belt. Both men over the last two years seemed capable of beating anyone in the IWS - unless the belt was on the line.
These two men are so much alike and yet so different. Both are obsessed with sex, although Eddy makes his conquests public while EXesS cuts a more private though no less devastating swath through the IWS' female fans. In fact, as Team Anglo can tell you, Eddy can drive women crazy for a few minutes, EXesS can drive women MENTAL PERMANENTLY.
Both men are resilient, with Eddy taking a slight edge as the Human Rubber Ball that he is. Both men are impressive high flyers with Eddy taking a slight edge because as Beef once put it, "No One Out STUPIDS Eddy!" Where EXesS has an advantage on Eddy is the vicious streak that he seems to have developed starting at Un F'N Sanctioned 2005 against Eddy and, of course, EXesS' amazing technical skills which allow him to bend his opponent's like a pretzel and just flat-out out-think his opponents.
This is the difference of course, Eddy's astonishing natural ability compared to EXesS' studied technique. EXesS is the dark mirror opposite of Eddy, and where Eddy's ambition was to win the IWS title more often than anyone else, it is EXesS' ambition NEVER to lose it.
End of Part One of Two
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Blood, Sweat and Beers
Saturday, September 17th, 2005
Montreal, Le Break
Dark Match - Jagger Miles vs. Jimmy Stone
No Contest (9:05) both men were attacked by 2.0
There being no Bloodstream, Manny (in a suit!!!) and 2.0 (also in suits!) entertained the crowd along with Franky the Mobster in a live "Cunt-Stream"
Manny announced that the Arsenal is under suspension for testing positive for anabolic steroids. Since the Arsenal was under that suspension when he ambushed and pinned Franky the Mobster during the Gauntlet match at Extreme Dream II, Manny declared that the Gauntlet match was null and void and that Franky the Mobster was the Number One Contender for EXesS' IWS Title.
Fred started the show by inviting out Viking. Before Viking could get some revenge on Fred for putting him through a chair with a top rope swinging pedigree at Extreme Dream II, Viking was ambushed by the "New SLI" - Superstar Shayne Hawke and Superstyle Maxime Boyer. After disposing of Viking, Fred announced that he had decided to place his allegiance with the one country that supported him this past year - the Philadelphia fans who chanted "Please Come back!" during Freedom to Fight, turning his back on the Quebec fans for daring to cheer louder for Damian and the Evil Ninja than for Fred.
Unveiling a life-size cut-out of US President George W. Bush and ditching his Quebec flag for a US one, Fred pledged his allegiance to the US and George W. Bush. He punctuated this declaration by giving his valet (and proud Canadian) Elsa Bangz a MASSIVE swinging pedigree.
All of this lead to an impromptu six man tag match between Fred and the New SLI-USA on one side and Player Uno and the Flying Hurricanes on the other. Player Uno quickly showed where his loyalties lay by landing a HUGE leg drop on a US handkerchief belonging to Shayne Hawke.
(After the match, talking to Player Uno, I discovered that the Mushroom Kingdom and the US are in the midst of a massive trade dispute involving Shitaki mushrooms. The US claims that the Mushroom Kingdom unfairly subsidizes the cost of growing mushrooms by being a giant mushroom patch. The Mushroom Kingdom counter-claims that the entire US trade department are out of their freaking minds. Despite the Mushroom Kingdom winning at every level of trade arbitration, the US continues to levy crippling tariffs on imports from the Mushroom Kingdom.)
(Then again since Player Uno communicates by beeping and hand gestures, he may have simply been saying that he had gas.)
Also, I should mention that Viking attacked and brutalized Hawke and Boyer after the match. Fred got away though.
SLI-USA: Fred la Merveille & Shayne Hawke & Maxime Boyer
vs.
Player Uno & the Flying Hurricanes (Takao & Kenny the Bastard)
Won by the new SLI-USA in 16:06. Hawke & Fred pinned Uno.
A fun match with a very cool dive sequence. Takao seemed to get his bell rung early in the match but gritted it out. The new SLI-USA, despite having just been formed,worked smoothly as a unit.
Kid Kamikaze vs Dan Paysan
Fought to a double pin at 13:01 in a match to determine the number one contender for the IWS Canadian title, the belt which Kid Kamikaze stole at Extreme Dream II.
How do you say "Pretzel" in Italian? Kid Kamikaze's submissions get nastier every month, I swear to God. Not to say that this wasn't a balanced match. Dan's high-flying is more than a match for Kid Kamikaze's mat wrestling. Dan hits the ropes for his sling-shot aerobatics like he is trying to tear down the ring.
Oh and D-Vyn for the second time in two shows was absolutely MURDERED. Last month, at Hardcore Heat, she ate a suplex from Elsa Bangz. This month she took a SICK Power Bomb from Vanessa Kraven. Which is a bit like being power-bombed by Vader only Vader's tits are slightly bigger and floppier than Vanessa's.
The Green Phantom vs. Tomassino
In an impromptu match, the two big man brawled until Angelina, Joey Soprano's sister distracted P-Nut long enough for Tomassino to sneak out the win after 7:22.
Another very even match. Phantom's brawling ability and experience would have given him the match if P-Nut wasn't distracted by Angelina's breasts. (Though to be fair, they are spectacular.)
Tomassino seems to get better with every match. He has gone from a tall, skinny kid in yellow pants to a FUCKING MONSTER. A legit 6' 8" with supernatural agility for his size. Watching him do a kip-up or climbing the ropes in one motion to give the Green Phantom a top-rope Enziguri is freaking terrifying. No one that big should be that agile or that fast.
Team Photosynthesis (El Generico & Beef Wellington)
vs.
2.0 (Jagged & Shane Matthews)
IWS Tag Team Title Match
2.0 succesfully defended their IWS tag team titles, double-pinning Beef Wellington in 14:18.
Fun match with Beef being beaten from post to post until he was able to tag El Generico in. Fun dive sequence as well. Ultimately, 2.0's teamwork was a little bit smoother than Team Photosynthesis.
Just prior to the intermission, Manny came to the ring to congratulate 2.0 on defending their gold... and called out the Evil Ninja. The Hardcore Ninja Number TWO! was losing the numbers game until he was abruptly rescued by a kendo-wielding Hardcore Ninja Number One who has been away from the IWS ring since Violent Valentines 2004, more than 18 months.
The crowd went nuts giving the white-clad Ninja a big "Welcome Back" chant and "Hardcore Who? Hardcore Ninja That's Who!"
(IWS crowds REMEMBER! That chant hadn't been used in close to two years!)
Chris Bishop vs. Lionel Knight
Chris Bishop defended his IWS Canadian title in 8:21.
Two guys who know each other very well putting on a great match in front of hot crowd who have never seen the two men fight. This is wrestling as it ought to be.
(Oh and just to twist the knife on Lionel Knight being called Eddie Murphy by the IWS crowd... Stab, our DJ, substituted Lionel's regular opening theme for the soundtrack to Beverly Hills Cop. Lionel was not impressed. The IWS fans loved it.)
Franky the Mobster vs. EXesS
In an old-school classic, EXesS beat Franky the Mobster in 20:06
EXesS is so dangerous. Franky has EXesS set up for his sit-out choke slam, EXesS turns it into his stretch muffler submission. Frank manages to get to the ropes, on the break gets EXEsS into position for the choke slam again and this time EXesS reverses it into a pinning roll-up and when Franky tries to roll out of it, EXesS just sits down forcing Franky's shoulders into the mat. Sweet finish.
Kevin Steen vs. Damian
Damian won the match after jumping off the entranceway TWICE onto Kevin Steen (who was on a no-selling table) - getting the win at 24:29.
Their first match was STIFF and GREAT. This match? STIFFER and BETTER. My favourite match this year.
Beef interfered on behalf of Damian a little after the 21 minute mark. After the match, Beef continued to taunt Kevin Steen. A punch-drunk Steen got the advantange on Beef until El Generico came to the ring... and turned on Beef himself with an OLE! kick to the face.
Kevin Steen then proceeded to cut an absoultely MOLTEN promo attacking Beef and declaring that the IWS now belonged to him and El Generico and that there was no one to stop them from doing whatever they wanted. Not for the first time, Kevin Steen got the crowd so wound up that Security, Manny and Guppie were almost peeling fans off Steen when he left the ring.
Our next show is Devil's Night scheduled for October 29th at Le Break, 20 Blvd Cremazie on the corner of Cremazie and St-Laurent, near metro Cremazie. (Montreal, Quebec, CANADA) Doors open at 7:30 pm, Show Starts at 9:00 pm. VIP tickets are $20, Regular tickets are $15. Card and times subject to change. To purchase tickets contact ME! at [email protected].
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These are pics and results from our two shows in Gatineau from last weekend (Gatineau is right across the hill from Ottawa, Canada's capital)
Afternoon ("Syndicate Invitational") results are here:
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/board/viewtopic.php?t=2745
Official Evening ("Hardcore Heat") Results are here:
CLICK HERE! Includes Pictures for both shows
More Informal results including the story of how the guy who is never supposed to take any bumps... (I'm FRAGILE damn it) kinda got knocked around a bit:
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=27227
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For those of you ever wondered "What does that IWS Shill look like?"
WONDER NO MORE!
Gaze in Horror at Llakor as Ring Announcer:
Oh and...
(Panda) BEAR is Dancing? How can that be?
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SCHOOL BAD, SMV GOOD!
The Super Special Back To School Smart Mark Video Sale!
Starts 9/11 and ends 9/14!!!
Who needs school supplies when you can buy four VHS or DVD titles and save 25%?!? That's right! Buy 4 titles and get a 25% discount! What's that you say? You really need those school supplies? * Well 9 out of 10 teachers agree that watching Smart Mark Video video tapes and DVDs is more important than school work! Oh, you're a college student? ** It's a proven fact that viewing Smart Mark Video video tapes and DVDs is the quickest path to higher education and guarentees success in any and all business careers that you may decide on! And college girls dig SMV Addicts! So what are you waiting for?!? Choose those 4 tapes or DVDs and during checkout enter the code K5 into the discount box! Saving money is good!
* this claim may or may not be true...
** we're pretty sure this claim is not true but we've been shown no evidence that proves it's not!
Personally, I would reccommend the following:
IWS - Un F'N Sanctioned 2003 (Medley show, FBTW Main Event)
IWS - Un F'N Sanctioned 2005 (Medley show, FBTW Main Event)
IWS - Scarred For Life 2005 (Kevin Steen vs. Damian - OM STIFF!)
IWS - Freedom to Fight 2005 (Our Philly show)
www.smartmarkvideo.com
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Three New Champions!
The International Wrestling Syndicate crowned three new champions yesterday as nearly three hundred fans crowded into Bar Le Break in Montreal cheering themselves hoarse and pounding the IWS ring in delight. Fans are already describing Extreme Dream II as “amazing” and “F’N Awesome!”
The summer is usually a slow time for Quebec wrestling in general. This show was our best attendance for an August show ever and the IWS management would like to thank the fans for their support.
Extreme Dream II
Bar Le Break, Montreal, Quebec
Saturday, August 20th, 2005
Attendance: 287
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Dark Match: Jimmy Stone beat Maxime Boyer 6:53
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Extreme Dream Semi-Finals
Chris Bishop pinned Kid Kamikaze 8:03
El Generico pinned Evil Ninja with a 450 splash 11:20
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IWS Tag Team Title Match
2.0 (Jagged & Shane Matthews) beat champions The Flying Hurricanes (Takao & Kenny the Bastard) in 13:13. Jagged & Shane combined for a double pin on Takao. The Flying Hurricanes were the longest reigning tag champions in IWS history winning the titles from the SLI (Viking & Damian) September 25th, 2004 during Freedom to Fight.
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Brian the Guppie lead a tribute to the late Chri$ Ca$h, a star of Combat Zone Wrestling and a friend to much of the IWS locker room who died tragically in a motorcycle accident.
Lionel Knight beat Player Uno 7:59
After the Intermission, IWS owner PCP Crazy F'N Manny came to the stage to publicly berate the Evil Ninja. The new IWS tag champs, 2.0, who had just recently celebrated with the fans and sprayed champagne in delight over their victory, came to the ring and turned their backs on the fans to follow the orders of “Uncle Manny” and beat the Evil Ninja senseless.
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Number One Contender Gauntlet Match
Entrant#1: Fred La Merveille
Entrant#2: Dan Paysan
Dan Paysan pins Fred La Merveille 9:53
Entrant#3: Viking
Viking pins Dan Paysan 15:11 (5:18)
Fred attacks his SLI partner Viking knocking him unconscious with a “101” pedigree from the top rope through a chair while SLI valet Elsa Bangz looked on in horror.
Entrant#4: Franky the Mobster
Franky did push-ups on Viking’s KO’d body for the pin 18:53 (3:42)
Entrant#5: Tomassino
Franky beat Tomassino 23:45 (4:52)
Entrant#6: The Arsenal
While Franky was cutting a promo, the Arsenal came out without music, knocked Franky loopy with a chair and rolled him up. 25:38 (1:53)
Entrant#7: Kevin Steen - Pro Wrestling Guerrila (California) champion and Combat Zone Wrestling Iron Man Champion
Kevin Steen beat the Arsenal with the Steenalizer 34:50 (9:12)
Entrant#8: Beef Wellington
In a stiff, epic contest Kevin Steen beat a serious (and tassle-less!) Beef Wellington, but it took two Package Pile Drivers, the second one on a chair to do it. 48.05 (13:15)
Kevin Steen immediately abandoned his shot at the IWS heavyweight title saying, “I don’t give a shit about the IWS or the IWS title. I am the CZW Ironman champion. I am the PWG champion - that makes me the best wrestler in California. Don’t get me wrong the IWS title is one of the most prestigious titles in the world, but I have already won it! The only reason that I want to be here, the only thing that makes me want to come back is... REVENGE. I want Damian. I want him next month, September 17th at Blood, Sweat and Beers. And I want him in a street fight, in a Last Man Standing Match!”
(I am slightly condensing Steen’s intense promo which alone would justify the purchase of the Extreme Dream II DVD when it comes out from www.smartmarkvideo.com )
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Extreme Dream Finals
Chris Bishop beat El Generico 13:03
Chris Bishop becomes the IWS’ first Canadian Champion. Bishop, from the Ontario based UWA hardcore promotion, has won his first five matches in three shows with the IWS - something no IWS rookie has ever done.
Kid Kamikaze spoiled Bishop’s celebrations ambushing the new champion and stealing the new belt before it was even unveiled.
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IWS Heavyweight Title Ladder Match
Traditionally IWS Main Events have Japanese ring intros, with both competitors in the ring in separate corners. IWS champion Sexxxy Eddy made that impossible attacking challenger EXesS during his entrance. The intense contest that followed featured insane bumps including a Russian Leg Sweep by Eddy off the top of a ladder through a barbed wire table.
To win and become the new IWS champion, EXesS had to practically murder Eddy throwing him off the ladder into the crowd, busting Eddy's mouth the hard-way and sending the nearly indestructible Sexxxy Eddy to the hospital for 14 stiches in his mouth. EXesS climbed the ladder to finally win the IWS title after countless failed attempts in the last two years. 21:03
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BloodStream For June:
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/images/m...bloodstream.wmv
My two most recent "When We Were Marks" IWS Profiles
Franky the Mobster - "The Credo of the Mobster"
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/board/viewtopic.php?t=2615
Pierre Carl Ouellet - "The Fire Still Burns"
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/board/viewtopic.php?t=2630
The "Quick & Dirty" Card for the 9th July-
IWS Philadelphia: Freedom to Fight
Steel Cage Match
IWS Title Match
Franky the Mobster (champion) vs. Pierre Carl Ouellet
IWS Tag Team Title Match
Flying Hurricanes (Takao & Kenny the Bastard) vs. 2.0 (Jagged & Shane Matthews)
Choose Your Colour Match
Kurt Lauderdale vs. The Green Phantom
Diva vs. Diva
Dan Paysan vs. The Kid Kamikaze Experience
STIFF 2: Electric Boogaloo
Damian vs. Viking II
Hardcore Menage a Trois
Sexxxy Eddy vs. the Evil Ninja vs. the Arse Anal
Student vs. Teacher
Tomassino vs. EXesS
Greatest Technical Match of all TIME!
Beef J. Wellington Esq. vs. Fred la Merveille Lauzon
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Strong Style Typings - Philadelphia: Freedom to Fight
Philadelphia, Here We Come!
In a world consumed by the forces of corporate wrestling, everywhere fans bow down to Caesar McMahonus who is bound and determined to make wrestling as boring as possible. He is resisted by a few brave rebels desperately trying to keep wrestling FUN: the Rotten One, the Quacker, the Man called Zandig. If you take your magnifying glass to a map of North America and look north to Montreal (just beside a small marker that says “Bret screwed here (by Bret) – VM”) you will see that the forces of corporate wrestling are being resisted by a small band of Gauls… who are packing?
Yes, packing. All but the Gaul’s DJ Stab. (So-called because listening to him is rather like being stabbed in the ear with an ice-pick.) Stab is tied to a tree away from his mixing board. Fortunately, Stab hasn’t been gagged (yet) so perhaps he can tell us why everyone is packing…
“Who are we?”
“We’re the International Wrestling Syndicate”
“Where are we going?”
“Philadelphia, Viking Hall, ECW Arena”
“What are we going to do?”
“We’re going to celebrate our FREEDOM TO FIGHT!”
Thanks, Stab, now on with the gag.
Yes, the International Wrestling Syndicate from Montreal is heading to Philadelphia to present Freedom to Fight at Viking Hall, July 9th. (As part of a double-header with CZW) Doors open at 1:30 pm, Show starts 2:00 pm.
Ticket Prices for IWS (or both IWS & CZW))
First Row: $35 ($60)
Second Row: $30 ($50)
Third to Fifth Row: $25 ($40)
General Admission: $20 ($35)
For those who have never heard of the IWS, we are a band of Crazy Canucks who put on the best wrestling shows in Canada. (And we are modest too!) We are the first Canadian wrestling promotion to have its own PPV in Canada. We are the only Canadian promotion to have its shows shot, edited and released by Smart Mark Video. We have introduced to the world to top stars like Sexxxy Eddy, Kevin Steen, El Generico, Beef Wellington and EXesS.
Fans of the IWS in the States who have never had a chance to come to Montreal have had a chance to see glimpses of the IWS – the psychotic Damian, his rival Viking who can chop a man’s chest to bloody ribbons, and the dapper Dan Paysan at CZW Trifecta. The IWS champion (and CZW Ironman champion) Franky the Mobster. The IWS tag team champions the Flying Hurricanes (Takao & Kenny the Bastard). The technical wizard of the IWS, Kid Kamikaze.
On July 9th, wrestling fans in the States will have a chance to see a full IWS show. This show will make wrestling history. It will be the first time that a Canadian wrestling promotion will have the chance to put on a show in the historic ECW Arena.
It is a huge opportunity for us and we intend to put on the damnedest show that we can. Those who have seen us in Montreal know that our goal is always to put on a show that is fun to watch. So, we are packing and we are not forgetting to bring the FUN!
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Match-A-Day
I will be announcing at least one match a day over the next week. Eight Matches in all.
Monday, June 20th, 2005: Steel Cage!
IWS Champion, Franky the Mobster will defend his IWS title in Philadelphia in a steel cage against WWF veteran Pierre Carl Ouellet. The Quebec Wrestling legend PCO is a three-time WWF tag team champ, a WCW hardcore champion and IWS champion. PCO lost his IWS title last June to El Generico during the IWS 5th Anniversary Show.
This is the first time that the IWS title has ever been defended in a steel cage. In fact, it is the first time that the IWS has ever been able to hold a steel cage match at all.
Monday, June 20th, 2005: Let the Big Boys Play!
One of the many highly anticipated debuts at Philadelphia: Freedom to Fight is the Career Killer, Kurt Lauderdale. US Fans have been hearing rumours about the Monster from Hemmingford and now they will be able to see that the stories are true. Kurt Lauderdale is big enough to look Sid Vicious in the eye. He is perhaps the most creative, the most destructive big man in Canada.
In Philadelphia, his opponent will be the IWS Hardcore Hero, the Green Phantom, perhaps the only man in the IWS, who can match Kurt Lauderdale in strength and power.
These two men started a friendly rivalry this year, but that broke down into a brawl at Scarred For Life when they missed a chance to win the IWS tag team titles as a team.
Expect violence. Expect a brawl. Most importantly, since the winner of this match will have a strong claim to a shot at the IWS title, expect that these two men will do anything to win.
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Tuesday, June 21st, 2005: Tuesday Tales From the Terrace
For those who are not from Montreal, a “terrace” is an outside patio joined to a bar, so that customers can eat and drink outside.
It is a Saturday afternoon in Montreal and I am sitting on a terrace with Kurt Lauderdale, and because Montreal has been doing this weird weather dance where we go from Innuvik in December to Atlanta in July and back again, I am freezing to death in what I have started to call “Kurt Lauderdale weather” – April in Halifax, cold and wet with rain that hits the ground so hard that it rains upwards as well as down.
Kurt is twirling a golden coin, ignoring the weather as well as the sign that says “Terrace Fermer”. "Patio Closed" We should have no chance in Hell getting served but one of the waitresses sticks her head out of the bar to glare at Kurt with a “If you think that I am coming out there” glare, which leads to a staring contest between her and Kurt. Mistake. Normally, out-staring Kurt is a bit like trying to out-stare a cat - a six foot five three hundred pound cat - but adding to the difficulty is the fact that Kurt is pissed off and as usual when he is angry there seem to be tiny orange flecks dancing in his eyes - a bit like how they used to describe Doc Savage’s eyes in the pulps only orange instead of gold. The effect is a little hypnotic.
Which is how I end up paying for a tray full of beers (and over-tipping like a wuss.) Kurt, fuelled by Belle Guelle "Nice/Good Mouth", launches into a rant…
“You see this coin? This is what I won in that little bet with the Green Phantom. A one dollar coin. A loonie. But not just any loonie, this is one of the coins where they replaced the loonie with Terry Fox. You think about it, Terry Fox is probably the Greatest Canadian Hero of all time. I mean, the guy has his leg cut off because of cancer. So he’s an amputee and I can dig that. But rather than giving up, he decides to run across the country to raise money for cancer research. A marathon a day, every day, running on pavement with that freaky metal leg grinding into his stump every single lurching run-step he made. And then he gets half-way across the country – Thunder Bay – gets diagnosed with cancer again and dies. Our biggest hero was killed by the country.”
While I am reflecting that the marathon itself is named after a Greek hero who ran 26 miles in full armour to deliver an important message during the battle of Marathon… and then immediately dropped dead, Kurt has spotted a bunch of rugby-shirt wearing posers drinking Coors Light and he is good-naturedly berating them,
“Why is American Beer like making love in a canoe? Because it’s FUCKING CLOSE TO WATER!”
And they laugh, because it is Kurt Lauderdale and when the Career Killer tells a joke, you laugh even if you have heard the joke a thousand times before.
Kurt drops the coin on the table, Terry Fox side up and looks serious.
“That’s the thing with this country. It kills. The hero challenges the country and the country wins. You can freeze to death, burn to death, drown. You can be biking your mountain bike in the woods and BAM! Grizzly bear takes your damn head off. This country will kill you if you’re not careful. I think that’s why Terry Fox is our biggest hero. Because I think we all believe deep in our guts that he knew he wasn’t making it across alive and he decided to do it anyway.
When the hero challenges the country, the country ALWAYS wins.
I just made a trip out to Two Mountains you know. Home of the Green Phantom, the Hardcore Hero of the IWS. The “Ancient Green Hills of Two Mountains.” Those hills? They are manicured, pedicured, domesticated, tamed. They aren’t hills anymore, they’re bumpy fucking lawns. And you drive by the houses in Two Mountains? They are all the same fucking house repeated over and over and over again with the same Japanese sports coupe in the driveway for the kids and the same SUV for Mom and the same toy pick-up for Dad – without enough torque to tow a fucking canoe. The Green Phantom is a hero of the fucking SUBURBS.
Me, I’m from Hemmingford. I’m from the Dark Woods. I’m from the country. In Hemmingford, we start the day with the dawn and we finish the day with dirt on our faces and blood on our hands. I’m not some suburban hero man, I’m a killer from the country.
When the Hero challenges the country, the country ALWAYS wins.
When the Hardcore Hero challenges the country, challenges Kurt Lauderdale, what do you think will happen?
Like Terry Fox, first I’m going to break him and then, then I’m going to kill him.”
Tuesday, June 21st: Tag Team Title Match
I have confirmed that the Flying Hurricanes will defend their IWS tag team titles at Philadelphia: Freedom to Fight. It appears that their opponents will be the Sultans of Smirk, 2.0, Jagged and Shane Matthews. How they managed to climb from a dark match demotion to a title shot in less than a month, I haven't quite figured out yet, but I'm working my backstage sources for information.
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Wednesday, June 22nd: Summer of Sequels
Movie reviewer Joe-Bob Briggs once explained the reasons that most sequels suck: the people making the sequel forget that they are supposed to make the same exact damn film over again which is how you end up with a Halloween movie with killer dolls when people want to see Michael Myers gut a busload of baby-sitters instead.
This summer the IWS bring you the sequel that you want to see: Viking/Damian TWO.
There is enough raw hatred between these two men to shatter glass and splinter wood, but odds are these two will go hardcore using only their own bodies as weapons. Viking can draw blood with his bare hands and Damian... What can you say about Damian? The psychotic self-proclaimed "God of War" takes no prisoners, makes no friends and leaves his opponents bloody and limp in the ring.
Knowing Viking though, he will be looking to change the ending of the first match and get his revenge on Damian. If anyone can humble the "God of War" it is the man who was his tag team partner for the better part of three years.
No matter the ending though, this is one sequel where you will get your money's worth.
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Burn, Ninja, Burn!
In a star-making performance, Kurt Lauderdale demonstrated just how violent he could be - sending the Evil Ninja through a flaming table to win the Triple Hell Death Match main event of the International Wrestling Syndicate’s Know Your Enemies. Kurt was fighting in his second match of the night replacing an injured Arsenal.
Know Your Enemies Results – Quick and Dirty
Saturday, April 23rd, 2005
Dark Match: Pornstar Juan beat Twiggy (6:57)
Dan Paysan beat Viking with help from his valet D-Vyn (12:41)
Kurt Lauderdale beat Shane Simmons (4:45)
The Arsenal announced the stipulations for the Triple Hell Death Match. IWS owner PCP Crazy F’N Manny attacked the Arsenal with a broken beer bottle putting him out of the main event and replacing him with Kurt Lauderdale.
Kid Kamikaze upset the Green Phantom with help from Vanessa Kraven (8:50)
2.0 (Jagged and Shane Matthews) beat the Flying Hurricanes (Takao and Kenny the Bastard) and Player Uno in a six man tag, despite their partner Tomassino turning on them and walking out. 2.0 double-pinned Kenny the Bastard (11:47)
Fred la Merveille beat Damian in a Hardcore Lumber-Jack match after the self-proclaimed “God of War” was distracted by footage of Kevin Steen wrestling in Japan (14:38)
Franky the Mobster defended his IWS title and CZW Ironman title beating Sexxxy Eddy with the help of Dan Paysan (14:48)
Kurt Lauderdale beat Evil Ninja in a Triple Hell Death Match.
First Fall: Star of Ninja Light Tube – Kurt Lauderdale (5:09)
Second Fall: Thumb Tacks – Evil Ninja (7:18)
Third Fall: Flaming Table – Kurt Lauderdale (10:33)
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My latest IWS profile is a short Fractured Fairy Tale about the Hardcore Ninjaz. It can be found here:
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=25236
In addition to Un F’N Sanctioned 2005, which we would recommend to anyone interested in the IWS, the latest IWS releases are Best of the Fan Favourites and coming soon: Know Your Enemies 2005. They can be ordered from www.smartmarkvideo.com or from me by paypal – [email protected]
Best of the Fan Favourites features the best matches from 2003 to 2005 of the the Arsenal, the Hardcore Ninjaz and the Motivator of Madness, the self-proclaimed “Fan Favourites” It includes seven matches as well as bonus material. This is a bit of an experiment for us, diving into the vaults like this. If you would like to support the IWS or you would like to see more titles like this from us, buy Best of the Fan Favourites today! Better still, buy two!
Tickets for Scarred For Life can be purchased for $15 for Regular tickets, $20 for VIP tickets either at Le Break or on-line by paypal from [email protected] We are offering a special right now, if you purchase 5 VIP tickets, we’ll throw in a free signed and numbered booklet of my columns leading up to Un F’N Sanctioned 2005. If you purchase 10 VIP tickets we throw in the booklet and a free Best of the Fan Favourites DVD. For that special the tickets should be purchased by paypal. If they are purchased before May 21st, the tickets, booklet and DVD will be mailed Express-Post in the same envelope.
As many of you know, the IWS will be going to Philly on July 9th to present a show as part of a double-header with CZW. We are organizing a bus trip from Montreal to Philly that would leave late Friday night, arrive in Philly Saturday morning, leave Philadelphia late Saturday night after the CZW show and arrive back in Montreal Sunday morning. The cost for the bus trip is $175 Canadian which includes tickets to the IWS show in a Canadian VIP section and a General Admission ticket to the CZW show. If you are interested in this bus trip, you need to make a $100 deposit by paypal on or before May 14th. Or send a money order to Michael Ryan c/o 233 Labrosse, Pointe Claire, Quebec, H9R 1A3
The Arsenal recently did a round table interview for 411Mania.com with Lance Steel (Chikara), Shirley Doe (IWC) and the Amazing KONG! (Japan). The interview can be found here:
http://www.411mania.com/wrestling/videos/a...?videos_id=1021
http://www.411mania.com/wrestling/videos/a...?videos_id=1022
Pictures for Know Your Enemies are up and can be found here:
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/images/i...0504/index.html
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Detailed Results IWS Know Your Enemies
Know Your Enemies began with a dark match pitting the tiny Twiggy against Pornstar Juan. These two former broom boys proved that they have benefited from their time observing the IWS action, bringing the crowd to their feet using no move more complicated than a wrist lock or a body slam. Twiggy especially impressed. He may be the smallest wrestler in Quebec, but Twiggy is just as smart as he is small. Pornstar Juan may have won the match in 6:57 with a body slam, but it was Twiggy that won the hearts of the crowd.
Dan Paysan opened the show proper, coming to the ring for the first time with his new “chica” D-Vyn, Sexxxy Eddy’s former valet. His opponent Viking continued to prove that, since being betrayed by Damian, he has elevated his game attacking Dan aggressively from the bell on. Unfortunately, Viking allowed himself to be distracted by D-Vyn on several occasions, missing some guaranteed pin-falls in the process. Dan was eventually able to turn one of D-Vyn’s distractions into a win after 12:41.
Since standing toe-to-toe and eye-to-eye with Sid Vicious last summer, Kurt Lauderdale has been a different man. To the delight of the IWS fans, Kurt has punished his opponents relentlessly. Returning to the IWS, Shane Simmons was able to use his speed to thwart the big man… for a little while. But Shane made one simple mistake, a missed elbow drop from the top post to the floor and Kurt took immediate advantage putting Shane away after 4:45.
After Kurt’s match, the Arsenal came to the ring to announce the stipulations for his main event Triple Hell Death Match against the Evil Ninja: Star of Ninja Light Tubes, Thumb Tacks and Flaming Tables. Barely finished announcing these stipulations, the Arsenal got jumped in the ring by IWS owner PCP Crazy F’N Manny. Still pissed over the stitches and concussion that he received in the Fans Bring the Weapons match during Un F’N Sanctioned 2005 at the hands of the Arsenal and Kurt Lauderdale, Manny carved the face of the Arsenal with a broken beer bottle. Kurt Lauderdale came back out to rescue the Arsenal only to be ambushed from behind by the Evil Ninja. Manny announced that, since he had just taken out the Arsenal, Kurt would have to take his place in Hell… Triple Hell that is.
Kid Kamikaze has declared that 2005 will be his year and after adding the hulking Vanessa Kraven to “The Kid Kamikaze Experience” he may very well be right. (My hospital insurance carrier requires me to add that Vanessa Kraven is astonishingly beautiful as well as strong.) Facing the Green Phantom, Kid Kamikaze pulled off an amazing upset, pinning the IWS Hardcore Hero after 8:50.
Jagged and Shane Matthews, 2.0, missed a golden chance to win the tag belts at Un F’N Sanctioned when Takao called in sick and Kenny the Bastard defended the titles by himself. The supposedly “Undefeated in the IWS” 2.0 got some small measure of revenge against Kenny, double pinning him at 11:47 during a six man tag where the Flying Hurricanes teamed with Player Uno. I do have to (very grudgingly) give 2.0 some respect for winning the match despite their partner, Tomassino, attacking the Sultans of Smirk and walking out on them mid-way through the match.
(It’s hard to blame Tomassino. The only reason that Jagged is not the most annoying man on the planet is that Shane Matthews is even more annoying. Still, in his time with the IWS, Tomassino has feuded with every man that he has ever teamed with including, according to rumours, kicking Chris Wells out of the car on the Trans Canada halfway between Toronto and Montreal the day of Know Your Enemies. I mean who in the blue hell is Tomassino going to tag with now?)
(I should probably also mention that the Pop of the night happened during this match and oddly is was not for a wrestler, but for a referee. 2.0 have made a habit of attacking IWS official Bakais, before, during and after their matches. At the end of their match at Know Your Enemies, 2.0 looked to do the same thing again, but Bakais ducked their attack and took out both men with clothesline. As Bakais prudently ran from the embarrassed 2.0, the crowd went NUTS.)
Before his Hardcore Lumber-Jack Match with Fred la Mervielle, Damian announced to the crowd that they should now refer to him as “The God of War”. He also complained that he should have been the first IWS wrestler to go to Japan and compete, not Kevin Steen.
This contest was the first Lumber-Jack match that the IWS has ever put on. In retrospect, putting two guys in the ring who flat out hate one another, surrounding the ring with wrestlers who mostly all have issues with one another, and then handing all the “bucherons” weapons… Well, it was a recipe for chaos – entertaining chaos – but still chaos. Damian was just about to take advantage of this chaos to pin Fred la Merveille when the IWS projector system malfunctioned, playing a clip of Kevin Steen’s Zero-One match from Japan… giving Fred la Merveille all the distraction that he needed to give Damian the “101” pedigree for the pin at 14:38.
Sexxxy Eddy and Franky the Mobster have fought each other from one end of Quebec to another, but never in the IWS and never for stakes as high as the IWS title or the CZW Ironman title. IWS fans were expecting a wild, outrageous match and these two old rivals did not disappoint. Franky proved that he will do absolutely anything to keep his titles, ripping off Eddy’s thong halfway through the match, to the delight of most of the ladies in the crowd and some of the men. Unfortunately for Franky the Mobster, there are no count-outs in the IWS (unless 2.0 are involved) so Eddy was able to run to the back, grab another thong and come back out to continue the match. (Eddy is always prepared – like a hardcore boy scout.) It appeared that Eddy was about to win back the IWS titles and become a three-time IWS champion when Dan Paysan and D-Vyn came to the aid of their fellow Italian Franky the Mobster, costing Eddy the match at 14:48.
(Oddly, Franky was not very appreciative, attacking Dan and D-Vyn after the match.)
Despite already wrestling Shane Simmons and being ambushed by the Evil Ninja earlier in the night, Kurt Lauderdale rose to the occasion in the Triple Hell Death Match putting the Evil Ninja through his own “Star of Ninja” light tube construction at 5:09 to win the first fall.
Looking for revenge after Kurt dropped a 27 inch TV on his head during the Fans Bring the Weapons match at Un F’N Sanctioned, PCP Crazy F’N Manny helped the Evil Ninja pin Kurt Lauderdale on ten thousand thumb tacks after 7:18.
Normally, Kurt Lauderdale would have the advantage in a (Flaming) Tables match since the Evil Ninja would find it difficult to lift the big man. But with Manny to do the heavy lifting, it appeared that the Ninja was about to barbecue the Career Killer… until a bloody Arsenal charged the ring to even the odds. As the crowd chanted “Burn, Ninja, Burn!” Kurt Lauderdale drove the Evil Ninja through a burning table for the win at 10:33.
The next IWS show is “Scarred for Life” Saturday, May 28th at 20 Blvd Cremazie, corner of St-Laurent, Montreal, Quebec, CANADA, Saturday April 23rd. Doors open at 7:30pm, bell rings at 9:00pm. Card subject to change. Tickets are $20 for VIP, $15 for Regular. To purchase tickets in advance e-mail [email protected] or go to Le Break. For further information about the IWS, go to our website www.syndicatewrestling.com
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The IWS on Tour
Jersey All Pro Wrestling
Aftershock
Saturday, April 23rd, 2005
Rahway Centre, Rahway, New Jersey
Before Aftershock kicked off, in a Jersey World Wide taping, Beef Wellington beat Danny Demanto in 2:26 with the Ass Punch/E. Coli combination. Reportedly, it was hilarious watching the stocky Demanto plod to the back trying to rub his head and his ass at the same time.
Azraiel successfully defended his JAPW Light Heavyweight championship against EXesS in 14:12 but the “Baby Oil Phenom” took Azraiel to the limit including a spinning variation of his stretch muffler submission. Before the match, EXesS cut a promo telling the crowd that to be sure to be understood he would speak slowly and then cut a S… L… O… W… promo in French(!)
In what has been called the best match of the night, Lo-Ki beat El Generico in 12:54. Despite losing, El Generico looked good, getting a lot more offence in against Lo-Ki than most of Lo-Ki’s opponents normally do. Lo-Ki had rather famously stolen El Generico’s mask at an earlier JAPW show and that was referred to in the match as Lo-Ki’s stole El Generico’s mask again and El Generico rolled under the ring to emerge wearing another mask.
Jack Evans and Teddy Hart beat the Odd Couple team of Kevin Steen and Beef Wellington in 14:19. Whatever chances the IWS pair had were nullified by the continuous bickering between the two men. Steen kept insisting that Beef stop clowning around and wrestle properly, which as anyone who follows the IWS knows aren’t really Beef’s strengths. Eventually, Beef was on the top rope with a chance to leap on Teddy Hart… or Ass Punch Kevin Steen. Two guesses what happened. Afterwards, Kevin offered to shake hands with Beef and forget the whole thing if Beef promised never to Ass Punch him ever again. Beef replied that he couldn’t promise that.
(Sounds like JAPW is setting up for a Beef/Steen match which as IWS fans know is a hellaciously good match.)
Times cheerfully stolen from Green Lantern Fan.
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Upcoming Events for IWS stars on tour
Beef Wellington and Kid Kamikaze will be representing the IWS at UWA Hardcore Wrestling in Mississauga, Ontario. I had the distinct pleasure of chewing the fat with some of the UWA management who came to our Know Your Enemies show next Saturday. From the sounds of it, their promotion has a lot in common with ours. I would urge any of our IWS fans who live in Ontario to check out their promotion and the Beef Wellington/Kid Kamikaze match. This match between two former tag partners by the way has only be done twice that I know of, once in the IWS in a “Loser Leaves Westmount” match that Beef lost and in a CZW under-card match where Beef lost as well. These two men still have a lot of unresolved issues, so I expect this to be a great match.
(That would be wrestling code by the way for: They hate each other and any time that you bring the hate in a wrestling match it’s a good thing.)
Combat Zone Wrestling
CZW’s fifth annual Best of the Best tournament (which is considered by the fans to be one of the most important CZW shows of the year) is scheduled for May 14th at Viking Hall in Philadelphia. This year, it will feature a strong IWS contingent. Representing the IWS will be IWS tag team champion, Kenny the Bastard, former IWS champion Kevin Steen, and former IWS champion El Generico. The other 13 competitors will be: B-Boy, Brandon Thomaselli (earned his spot by beating Damian and Hallowicked at Trifecta 3, pinning Damian), Chris Hero, Derek Frazier, Ebessan, Super Dragon, Sabian, Claudio Castognoli, Excalibur, Chris Bosh, Mike Quackenbush, Nate Webb, and the final entrant Arik Cannon.
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Can I get some info on Vordell Walker and Kevin Steen.Are they any good? What kind of style do they use? Finishers?
Kevin Steen was trained by Jacques Rougeau Jr. (In practice that means that he was largely trained by Eric Mastrocola (whose biggest claim to fame is a Sunday Night Heat match with Handsome JF, another Rougeau student, against Rosey and Hurricane) and Kevin's real mentor is Pierre Carl Ouellet aka Jean Pierre Lafitte.
Kevin started as a high flyer called simply "Le Kid" but after blowing out his knee turned to a more mat based styled with a high impact offence. The wrestler that he most resembles in style and build is the late Owen Hart. (This btw is my own personal opinion, so don't get upset at me if you somehow think it inappropriate to say so.)
Finishers: Package Pile Driver famously stolen by PCO when he was wrestling as X for TNA
Steenalizer - hard to describe - there is a MV of it floating around - opponent starts out in a power-bomb postion and Kevin sturns it into an over-head throw like a Suplex. Innovative, Technical and Vicious - like Kevin Steen.
I've written about Kevin a lot to explain him to American fans especially to explain his nickname "Mr. Wrestling" which was given to him by the Montreal fans.
My When We Were Marks profile of Kevin called "The Kevin Steen Conspiracy" is here:
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=24624
This is an interview that I did with Kevin after one of our show last year when he was still our champion (International Wrestling Syndicate):
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=22551
It should be said that Kevin hasn't been given the opportunity yet in ROH to really demonstrate how good he is. If you want to see Kevin at his best I would reccommend:
Know Your Enemies 2004: best 2/3 falls vs. Pierre Carl Ouellet for the IWS title
Blood, Sweat & Beers 2004: Fred la Merveille accuses Kevin of not being "French" enough for the title. Amazing match.
Born to Bleed 2004: 6pack match for the IWS title - Kevin vs. Franky the Mobster vs. PCO vs. Kurt Lauderdale vs. El Generico vs. EXesS - Match was so hot Kevin got attacked by a fan (I'm not encouraging the behaviour, I'm just saying) Amazing dive by Kevin off some scaffolding
Un F'N Sanctioned 2005: One of the things that makes this THE IWS DVD to buy is the Franky the Mobster vs. Kevin Steen match including a great promo to set up the match
Un F'N Sanctioned 2003: Until we did Un F'N S 2005, this was the dvd that we reccommended to newbies. One of the reasons: Kevin Steen's first match in the IWS against EXesS69. If you listen closely, you can hear the first rumblings of a Mr. Wrestling chant.
All of these discs are available at www.smartmarkvideo.com and tell them that Llakor sent you. (No real reason to do that, I'm just saying.)
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Non-IWS performances to pick up:
Pretty much any of his PWG matches (Translation, I don't remember what is out, but it's all good)
JAPW 7th Anniversary show - Steen vs EXesS - two old adversaries face each other in front of a new crowd, they start out with the crowd going "What the Hell" and finish with the crowd on their feet. As Bob Magee of PWBTS has written and I'm going to paraphrase because I don't remember exactly - Best thing of watching the IWS guys with a new crowd is watching the part of the crowd that has never seen them before slowly realize that they are watching something special.
I would reccommend any of the Steen/JAPW stuff, but JAPW is slow to release. The 7th Anniversary show I know is out.
Mid-Summer Madness 2004: Kevin Steen vs Samoa Joe - Kevin is IWS and EWR (Quebec) Champion, Joe naturally is ROH champion. The two men beat the shit out of each other for a twenty-minute draw before Franky the Mobster and Chase Ironside turn it into a fun tag match.
New Year's Madness 2005: Kevin Steen wins a four-way against Samoa Joe, El Generico and EXesS69 which gives him the right to face Austin Aries in an INCREDIBLE match for the ROH title.
The two Madness shows are inter-promotional shows done in Montreal by Marc le Grizzly. If you are interested in them, I can pick up the DVDs for you from Marc. Contact me by e-mail for price details. ([email protected])
And I have a whole rant built up about how Kevin Steen has fought for the ROH title TWICE outside of ROH and how there is a built-in angle right THERE, which ROH is just pissing away, don't get me started...
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”Fan Favourites” Collide in “Hell”
Once, they terrorized the locker room of the International Wrestling Syndicate together. Once they were rule-breakers, hardcore mutilators together. Once they called themselves the “Fan Favourites”: the Arsenal and the Evil Ninja. Then the Arsenal got fired and rather than following his supposed best friend out of the IWS, the Evil Ninja turned his back on the Arsenal. More recently, the two men clashed during the main event of Un F’N Sanctioned last month. After the show, the Evil Ninja attacked the Arsenal backstage.
On Saturday, April 23rd, during IWS’ Know Your Enemies, the Arsenal knows his enemy and he will be looking revenge in a match that the Arsenal created: the Triple Hell Death Match. It is a best two out of three falls match, with the Ninja choosing the first death match stipulation for the first fall, the Arsenal choosing for the second fall and the fans choosing for the third fall if it is necessary.
(As announced on IWS Bloodstream send your choices for Death Match Stipulation to [email protected])
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Know Your Enemies Card Quick and Dirty
Main Event – Triple Hell Death Match:
The Arsenal vs. the Evil Ninja
IWS Title Match and CZW Ironman Title Match:
Franky the Mobster (champion) vs. the Triple X “Sex XXXpress” Sexxxy Eddy
Eight Man Tag Match:
Flying Hurricanes – IWS Tag Team champions (Takao and Kenny the Bastard) plus Player Uno and Shinjiro Hashinoku vs. 2.0 (Jagged and Shane Matthews) and the Wrecking Crew (Tomassino and Chris Wells)
Le GRUDGE 2: Les Boucherons Hardcore:
Fred la Merveille vs. Damian
(Hardcore Lumberjack match)
the Green Phantom vs. The Kid Kamikaze Experience co-starring Vanessa Kraven
Dan Paysan vs. Viking
Kurt Lauderdale vs. An opponent to be announced
Dark Match:
Pornstar Juan vs. Twiggy
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The new IWS Bloodstream can be downloaded here:
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/images/m...amapril2005.wmv
My latest IWS profile is a short Fractured Fairy Tale about the Hardcore Ninjaz. It can be found here:
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=25236
UN F’N Sanctioned 2005, described by fans as “The Best IWS show ever” can be ordered now from www.smartmarkvideo.com for $20. The exact link is:
http://www.smartmarkvideo.com/ccp5/cgi-bin...str=HOME:IWSDVD
Tickets for Know Your Enemies can be purchased for $15 for Regular tickets, $20 for VIP tickets either at Le Break or on-line by paypal from [email protected] We are offering a special right now, if you purchase 5 VIP tickets, we throw in a free UN F’N Sanctioned t-shirt. If you purchase 10 VIP tickets we throw in the t-shirt and a free UN F’N S DVD. For that special the tickets should be purchased on-line and the t-shirt and DVD can be picked up at the show.
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Know Your Enemies Detailed Preview
Franky the Mobster and Sexxxy Eddy have fought each other many times, all over Quebec. On Saturday, April 23rd, during Know your Enemies, they will face each other one more time. But this time, the stakes have been raised. These two men have never faced each other in an IWS ring, let alone with the IWS title on the line, not to mention the CZW Ironman title.
At the Paramount theatre presentation of WrestleMania, Eddy told me (right after putting Beef Wellington through a table) “I have wrestled all over Quebec. I have wrestled Franky all over Quebec. But all those matches were just foreplay. When the match happens in the IWS, in front of the IWS fans, that’s when it MATTERS. And Franky better be ready, because he seems to think that I’m a nice guy. I have news for Franky, I’m only a nice guy when there’s nothing at stake. To win the CZW Ironman title, to get back the IWS title, to become the three time IWS champion, I will do whatever it takes.”
Hot off the heels of their impressive showing at CZW's Trifecta 3, Dan Paysan and Viking will face off at Know Your Enemies one on one.
At our last show, Kid Kamikaze won his first match in nearly a year dispatching Dan Paysan and El Generico with the help of his new "Body" Guard - Vanessa Kraven - who destroyed El Generico with a vicious power bomb during Un F'N Sanctioned. Kid Kamikaze has declared that 2005 will be his year. But at Know your Enemies, Kid Kamikaze's win-streak will be put to the test when he must face the IWS' Hardcore Hero - The Green Phantom.
Curiously, it appears that the Green Phantom insisted on this match because of Kurt Lauderdale? The two big men of the IWS are jockeying for an IWS title shot, but IWS owner PCP Crazy F’N Manny hates both of them. While the tw men wait for an opportunity, they have agreed to a friendly wager. The wrestler who pins his opponent first wins a shiny Terry Fox memorial dollar coin. We know the Green Phantom’s opponent, but at the moment we do not know Kurt Lauderdale’s opponent.
The Sultans of Smirk, 2.0, Shane Matthews and Jagged have somehow convinced "Uncle Manny" to book an Eight Man tag for Know Your Enemies. According to Shane, the intention is to humiliate the Flying Hurricanes first and to take away their belts... later.
(At least that's what I think Shane said, my notes are a little wet, Shane sprays when he talks.)
2.0 have chosen the Wrecking Crew to be their partners. If these two teams can work smoothly together they make an imposing physical force.
The unexpected beneficiaries of 2.0's petition to "Uncle Manny" are Player Uno and Shinjiro who have been made the Flying Hurricanes partners' for the match. This makes Uno and Shinjiro's first appearance on the main card. We wish the rookies luck, lots and lots of luck... not to mention the best first aid kit that money can buy because against the Wrecking Crew and 2.0 they are going to need it.
Fred la Merveille has challenged his former best friend Damian to a rematch of their ultra-violent “Le Grudge” match at the Medley. Only this time, to keep the action in the ring, Fred has demanded that the ring be surrounded with “Hardcore Lumber-Jacks”
Prior to Know Your Enemies, two long time IWS volunteers will get their chance in the IWS ring as Twiggy takes on Pornstar Juan.
(It should be noted that Twiggy has previously made his IWS debut taking part in the gauntlet during Violent Valentines 2003, being eliminated by the Green Phantom. And if I remember correctly landing on a member of EXesS' family who didn't move fast enough despite being warned by Team Anglo.)
The IWS presents Know Your Enemies at Bar le Break, 20 Blvd Cremazie, Montreal, Quebec, CANADA, Saturday April 23rd. Doors open at 7:30pm, bell rings at 9:00pm. Card subject to change. Tickets are $20 for VIP, $15 for Regular. To purchase tickets in advance e-mail [email protected] or go to Le Break. For further information about the IWS, go to our website www.syndicatewrestling.com
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Huge Crowd For a Huge Show
Pictures from UN F'N Sanctioned can be found here:
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/images/i...503a/index.html
In front of a crowd of 837 people, the IWS put on what is already being described as a five star show by the fans: Un F’N Sanctioned 2005. We have always recommended Un F’N Sanctioned 2003 as the show that fans should watch first to see what the IWS is all about. Today, we would still recommend Un F’N Sanctioned… Un F’N Sanctioned 2005 that is.
Un F’N Sanctioned Results Quick & Dirty
Kid Kamikaze won the Three-Way Dance over Dan Paysan and El Generico pinning El Generico at 13:59.
Double K won with the help of the monstrous Vanessa Kraven who made her IWS debut with a thunderous power bomb on El Generico.
ExesS beat Sexxxy Eddy in 12:34 with the help of the ropes.
Wrestling without his injured partner, Takao, Kenny the Bastard of the Flying Hurricanes successfully defended his IWS tag team titles in a four team scramble match pinning Shane Matthews of 2.0 at 10:18.
Marc le Grizzly of le SLI was pinned after 5:05 to eliminate him and Viking after 2.0 hit him with a chain.
2.0 (Shane Matthews and Jagged) then eliminated the Wrecking Crew (Tomassino and Chris Wells) after 8:24 by pinning Tomassino
Returning from an injury, the Green Phantom pinned Chris Hero in 14:42.
A serious Beef Wellington pinned Super Dragon in 13:43.
In a vicious brawl, Damian beat Fred la Merveille in 17:10.
Franky the Mobster successfully defended his IWS title and CZW Ironman title beating Kevin Steen in 19:11, but only with the help of Damian.
D-Vyn beat former IWS president Seska in a lube match in 3:38 with the help of Dan Paysan.
Kurt Lauderdale and the Arsenal beat IWS owner PCP Crazy F’N Manny and the Evil Ninja in a bloody Fans Bring the Weapons match after 20:21.
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Detailed Un F’N Sanctioned Results
The show started with a bang or make that an OLE! as El Generico made his return to the IWS after an absence of nearly four months, and after a tour of Europe. He faced Dan Paysan and Kid Kamikaze in a high flying three way dance that many fans are calling the greatest IWS opening match ever. El Generico stood poised to win until the unexpected debut of the monstrous Vanessa Kraven who destroyed Generico with a thunderous power bomb from the Medley stage into the ring. This gave Kid Kamikaze the opportunity to dispatch El Generico with a Shining Wizard at 13:59. It quickly became clear that Vanessa Kraven is the new featured star of the Kid Kamikaze Experience.
(As a side note, I should point out that when I say that Vaness Kraven is a monster, I do not mean to imply that she in unattractive. In fact, Vanessa Kraven is an extraordinarily beautiful woman… who just happens to be 6 feet tall and 200 pounds of hard body; who is rumoured to make grown men cry during practice with her knife-edge chops; who is in better shape than 99% of the men in Quebec, heck Canada and who is not going to hurt me for calling her “monstrous”. Right? Right? Please? Pretty please?)
For nearly two years, wrestling fans have waited for Sexxxy Eddy and EXesS to have a match to see who is truly the best in Quebec. The fans were not disappointed when these two men finally met as the two combined for a high-flying technical show. What was disappointing was that EXesS felt compelled to cheat and use the ropes to get the win after 12:34. What was even more disappointing was that ExesS turned his back on the fans by attacking Eddy after the match.
Three weeks ago at Breakout, Tomassino of the Wrecking Crew tried to choke out Takao of the Flying Hurricanes by tying him to the ring post by his mask. Despite an injured larynx, Takao was planning on gritting out the injury until he woke up the morning of Un F’N Sanctioned having difficulty breathing and swallowing. His doctor forbid Takao from wrestling… which left Kenny the Bastard alone to defend the ‘Canes tag team title against three other teams in a four way scramble match: the Wrecking Crew (Tomassino and Chris Wells), le SLI (Viking and Mark the Grizzly) and 2.0 (Shane Matthews and Jagged).
In a match filled with ironies, while it was 2.0’s first “official” loss in the IWS, it was also their most dominant performance. They eliminated le SLI at 5:05 by pinning Marc le Grizzly (with the help of a chain) and then they eliminated the Wrecking Crew by pinning Tomassino at 8:24 after a double team back breaker and three consecutive Jagged knees to Tomassino’s face. In each case, 2.0 deliberately focused and dispatched the larger member of the team they were facing. Also ironically, despite pinning the two giants involved in the match, 2.0 lost to the smallest wrestler in the scramble: Kenny the Bastard. The Lizard King took advantage of a momentary miscommunication between Jagged and Shane Matthews to pin Matthews at 10:18. No doubt 2.0 are devastated by this lost chance to win IWS gold.
The Green Phantom made a triumphant return from the injured list at Un F’N Sanctioned beating Chris Hero with a Phantasm at 14:42 after a massive brawl. People were not expecting much from this match, expecting ring rust from the Green Phantom or a styles clash, but the only clash that people got was the clash of fore arms and fists. The Green Phantom came looking for a fight and Chris Hero gave him one before the Hardcore Hero of the IWS emerged triumphant.
A serious even grim Beef Wellington faced off against a man reputed to be the stiffest man in California: Pro Wrestling Guerilla champion Super Dragon. In a non-title match, most people thought Beef would be lucky to survive. But Beef matched Super Dragon stiff shot for stiff shot, even throwing away his beloved tassels during the match to show how serious he was. Beef received a thunderous roar of approval after pinning Super Dragon at 13:43.
The bell had not even rung when Fred la Merveille speared Damian out of the ring during his entrance ritual. These two former best friends battled through the crowd of the Medley lacing each other with stiff shots. Damian appeared to be out to cripple Fred at one point giving Fred a double foot stomp from the top rope to the floor where Fred was sandwiched between two ring barriers. After 17:10 of an intense physical contest, Damian finished Fred off with a double knee stomp from the top rope.
Franky the Mobster was brought into the IWS by Kevin Steen. Franky the Mobster got his shot at the CZW Ironman belt, because an injured Kevin Steen suggested that Franky take his place against B-Boy. Instead of gratitude, Kevin received jealousy and paranoia from Franky. This set the stage for their match at Un F’N Sanctioned. Making his return to the IWS after four months and a trip to Japan, Kevin Steen moved with even more confidence in the ring than he showed when the fans gave him his nickname Mr. Wrestling. Kevin seems determined to earn that nickname.
Kevin’s new confidence gave Franky fits. And Kevin Steen would be the IWS champion right now if referee Bakais had not been distracted during a sure three count by the arrival of Damian at ring side. Kevin Steen had just given Franky two consecutive Package Pile-Drivers, knocking Franky loopy. Damian’s arrival saved Franky’s championship and after a top rope foot stomp on Kevin and a vicious corner Ohtani kick, Damian dragged an unconscious Franky over a stunned Kevin Steen for the victory at 19:11. Why Damian attacked Kevin Steen remains to be determined, what is not in doubt is that Kevin is pissed about it.
Like a sorbet to cleanse the palate between two courses, the ladies’ lube match between former IWS President Seska and former Sexxxy Eddy valet D-Vyn was sandwiched between the two main events of Un F’N Sanctioned. IWS commentator, the Renaissance Man Peter LaSalle, the self-proclaimed “Dirtiest Man in the Business” was delighted to be asked by Seska to lube her up while D-Vyn was being lubed her best (girl) friend. Adding to the mayhem was special guest referee Big Larry of T-Unit. The match itself was short but sweet as the two women engaged in a brief and slippery cat-fight before Dan Paysan interfered on behalf of his fellow Italian D-Vyn to give her the pin at 3:38.
For close to six months, IWS owner kept the Arsenal out of the IWS ring, preventing him from doing what he does best – hurting people and smiling about it. On Saturday, during a bloody Fans Bring the Weapons, the Arsenal was smiling as he and his partner, Kurt Lauderdale, used “Weapons of Manny Destruction” to beat their own boss into a concussion and a win after 20:21. The high light of the match was no doubt the stereo balcony dive as a bleeding Arsenal dropped a double knee off the balcony onto Manny through a table while the Evil Ninja dropped an elbow off the balcony onto Kurt Lauderdale and through a table.
With the match over, the victorious Arsenal, crazed by his need for revenge, sent Manny to the hospital by dropping a TV on Manny’s head while his head was being held down on a chair by Kurt Lauderdale.
After the show, walking through glass so thick that it crunched under their feet like a layer of crusty snow on a cold January night, the fans dazed and mostly inebriated staggered out of Le Medley announcing to the world that they had just seen the best IWS show ever.
Un F’N Sanctioned 2005 will be available for sale on VHS and DVD soon from www.smartmarkvideo.com You can already purchase previous IWS shows from there on VHS or DVD.
The IWS is pleased to announce that our next show, Know Your Enemies will be hosted at Bar le Break, 20 Blvd Cremazie, Montreal, Quebec, CANADA, Saturday April 23rd. Doors open at 7:30pm, bell rings at 9:00pm. Tickets are $20 for VIP, $15 for Regular. To purchase tickets in advance e-mail [email protected]. For further information about the IWS, go to our website www.syndicatewrestling.com
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The IWS on tour
CZW
This Saturday, April 2nd during CZW’s Trifecta Elimination 3…
The Triple X “Sex XXXpress” Sexxxy Eddy is scheduled to face Eddie Kingston while…
Viking, Damian and Dan Paysan are scheduled to face off in a three way dance with the winner meeting the winner of the Chikara three way dance (Jigsaw vs. Hallowicked vs. Joly Roger) and the winner of the IWA-MS three way dance (Brandon Thomaselli vs. Silas Young vs. Josh Abercrombie)
Also rumoured to appear are Beef Wellington and IWS and CZW Ironman champion Franky the Mobster.
PWG
Kevin Steen and El Generico are scheduled to appear during PWG’s All-Star Weekend April 1st and 2nd at the Hollywood-Los Feliz JCC Center. On the first nights show, they are scheduled to fight in the main event in a three-way dance with Super Dragon for his PWG title.
El Generico
El Generico just returned from a whirlwind tour of Europe. On Friday, March 18th for TAP Wrestling in Loughborough, England he defeated El Ligero. On Saturday March 20th for wXw in Essen, Germany he lost to Super Dragon. On Sunday March 21st for IPW:UK in Orpington, Kent, England he teamed with Aviv Mayaan and lost to Super Dragon and Stevie Douglas. El Generico was pinned by Super Dragon at the same time that Aviv Mayaan was pining Stevie Douglas. Aviv Mayaan then faced off against Super Dragon one on one… and lost.
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This Show Will Be… Un F’N Sanctioned
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/artwork/unfns.jpg
The International Wrestling Syndicate is known for its legendary Medley shows, where we pull out all the stops. If there is one match that the IWS is known for, it is Fans Bring the Weapons, where the fans of the IWS demonstrate their terrifying creativity. On March 26th, the IWS is pleased to present Un F’N Sanctioned at le Medley (1170 St-Denis, Montreal) with the main event being Fans Bring the Weapons. Medley shows are not to be missed. The Fans Bring the Weapons matches have to be seen to be believed. Combine the two and you have an early candidate for show of the year.
This year’s Fans Bring the Weapons promises to be truly memorable because of the two teams involved. IWS owner PCP Crazy F’N Manny and his hired gun, the Evil Ninja, will be taking on the team of the One Man War, the Arsenal and Career Killer Kurt Lauderdale. These are two teams who truly hate one another. Kurt and the Arsenal hate Manny for having fired them. The Arsenal hates his former tag partner, the Evil Ninja, for turning his back on their alliance when the Arsenal got fired, while Kurt Lauderdale hates the Evil Ninja for having sliced open his arm with a Ninja sword last summer. The fans are clearly on the side of the Arsenal and Kurt Lauderdale and I have had many fans promise me that they will be bringing to le Medley “Weapons of Manny Destruction”
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Un F’N Sanctioned Card Quick & Dirty
Main Event - Fans Bring the Weapons:
The Arsenal & Kurt Lauderdale vs. The Evil Ninja & PCP Crazy F’N Manny
IWS Title Match: Franky the Mobster (champion) vs. Kevin Steen
Franky the Mobster is also CZW Ironman Champion. Both titles will be on the line.
IWS Tag Team Title Match – Four Way Scramble:
The Flying Hurricanes (Takao & Kenny the Bastard – champions) vs.
2.0 (Jagged & Shane Matthews) vs.
Le Syndicate de Lutte International (Marc le Grizzly & Viking) vs.
The Wrecking Crew (Tomassino & Chris Wells)
2.0 are undefeated in the IWS.
Inter-Species Open Challenge Match:
Beef J. Wellington vs. Super Dragon
LE GRUDGE:
Damian vs. Fred la Merveille
Who Is the Hero?:
IWS “Hardcore Hero” Green Phantom vs. “The Saviour of Wrestling” Chris Hero
Sex vs. XES:
The Triple X “Sex XXXpress” Sexxxy Eddy vs. ExesS
Three-Way Dance:
El Generico vs. Dan Paysan vs. the Kid Kamikaze Experience
Lube match:
Seska vs. D-Vyn
The Bloodstream for Un F’N Sanctioned can be found here:
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/images/m...dia/BSMarch.wmv
Because this is a huge show, this is a huge Bloodstream – more than 100 MB! For best results we would recommend that you right click on the link and choose save as.
Speaking of huge…
For a detailed write-up of Fans Bring the Weapons and exactly how the match came about and why its participants hate each other and most importantly how each participant might fare in the environment of Fans Bring the Weapons, click here:
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=25062
This is part of a series of in-depth profiles of IWS wrestlers grouped under the name “When We Were Marks”. Others include:
The Kayfabe History of the IWS: (2001-2003)
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=14405
Beef Wellington and the Secret Origin of the Ass Punch
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=24863
The Kevin Steen Conspiracy
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=24624
The Secret Origin of El Generico
http://the-w.com/thread.php/id=24405
Full permission is given to use these columns or to quote from them.
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Official Preview of IWS Un F’N Sanctioned
http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/artwork/unfns2.jpg
IWS fans are at a fever pitch in anticipation of Fans Bring the Weapons pitting two teams against each other who could not hate each other anymore in the most dangerous match held in Canada. The fans have chosen their favourites and are building weapons designed to give Kurt Lauderdale and the Arsenal an edge over the Evil Ninja and PCP Crazy F’N Manny.
But Un F’N Sanctioned will also include matches that have been building for months. Long time IWS fans are having a hard time deciding which match they are looking forward to the most.
To begin with, Kevin Steen will be making his triumphant return from Japan on March 26th. It will be the first time that Kevin will be in an IWS ring since losing his IWS title in November. Kevin lost his title in six man elimination match in November during Born to Bleed, when El Generico pinned Kevin while Mr. Wrestling was still distracted from a fan throwing a beer pitcher at his head. Franky the Mobster was supposed to be watching Kevin’s back. Instead, Franky was looking for an opportunity and he took it to become the new IWS champion.
All of that is on the record. What is not so well known, is that Kevin Steen was originally scheduled to face B-Boy for the Combat Zone Wrestling Iron Man title in Philadelphia. When Kevin was unable to go to Philly to face B-Boy, once again Franky the Mobster saw an opportunity and took it. On March 26th, both the IWS title and the CZW Ironman title will be on the line. Kevin Steen considers both titles to be his and he plans to take both of them back from the man who was supposed to be watching Kevin’s back, but who was really out for himself: Franky the Mobster.
Last October, during Blood, Sweat and Beers, the IWS beloved French clown, le chef du Syndicat de Lutte Internet, proved that he could get serious in a match for the IWS title against Kevin Steen. Fred would be the IWS champion right now if Damian had not betrayed him. Since October, Fred has been chasing Damian finally catching up with him two weeks ago during BREAKOUT, tackling Damian out of the ring with a sickening thud and then brawling with him through the fans.
The question is mind you, now that Fred has caught Damian, now that Fred has his match with Damian, what will Fred do? Since quitting le SLI, Damian has been brutalizing every man in his path, putting on great, vicious matches. Can Fred withstand the Japanese inspired fury of the Quebec Extremist, Damian? Can Fred get his revenge?
For years, fans of the IWS have been looking forward to a match pitting two of the best high-flyers in Canada; two of the best technical wrestlers in Canada; two of the sexiest men in the world: ExesS vs. Triple X “Sex XXXpress” Sexxxy Eddy. March 26th at Un F’N Sanctioned, that match will finally happen. No matter who wins, the true winner will be the fans.
Beef J. Wellington made his mark on the wrestling world by beating a Bear at the IWS Fifth Anniversary show “V” and then teaming with a Bear during the Chikara World Tag Grand Prix. For Un F’N Sanctioned, Beef made an “Inter Species Open Challenge”. Beef was planning on fighting an combative or an angry squirrel. But his challenge was answered by California’s Super Dragon, the stiffest wrestler in North America.
Everyone knows Beef J. Wellington as the class clown of independent wrestling. What IWS fans know is that when Beef gets serious, he is a formidable opponent. The fans have warned Beef, “Super Dragon Will Kill You!” Beef has responded that at le Medley, he will make Super Dragon his bitch.
During Un F’n Sanctioned, the IWS tag team champions, the Flying Hurricanes (Takao and Kenny the Bastard) will defend their IWS tag team titles in a four way scramble match against the teams of the Wrecking Crew (Tomassino and Chris Wells), le Syndicat de Lutte Internet (Viking and Marc le Grizzly) and last but not least, 2.0 (Jagged and Shane Matthews). This will be a rare opportunity to see the semi-retired, Quebec wrestling legend, Marc le Grizzly wrestle a full match and he has committed to returning to active wrestling as Viking’s partner if they win. 2.0 will be putting their IWS undefeated streak on the line.
Presently touring Europe, El Generico will be making his return to the IWS ring, his wrestling birthplace, on March 26th. He will be competing in a three-way dance against Dan Paysan and the Kid Kamikaze Experience. Many fans consider El Generico’s three-way dance against Kevin Steen and Pierre Carl Ouellet to be the best match in IWS history. At Un F’N Sanctioned, will El Generico be able to catch lightning in a bottle once again? One thing is for certain, both Kid Kamikaze and Dan Paysan are looking to make their reputations at the expense of El Generico.
Last August, the IWS Hardcore Hero, the Green Phantom fractured his elbow. Other than a stint as a guest referee, he has not been seen since. The Green Phantom was getting ready to make his return when he saw that ha had been replaced in the IWS by another Hero… Chris Hero. The Green Phantom has made it clear to anyone who will listen that there is room for only one hero in the IWS. This match pits a great brawler against a great technical wrestler. When asked if he was worried about a clash of styles, the Green Phantom responded, “The only clash that Chris so-called Hero needs to worry about is the clash of my fist in his face, brother!”
Also scheduled for Un F’N Sanctioned, former IWS President Seska will settle her differences with Sexxxy Eddy’s former valet D-Vyn in a lube match.
During IWS Un F’N Sanctioned, the IWS will be announcing a date for a double-header with Combat Zone Wrestling in Philadelphia in the historic home of ECW, Viking Hall. This will mark the first time that a promotion from Canada has run a show in the “Home of Hardcore”.
The IWS is also pleased to announce that performing live during Un F’N Sanctioned will be renowned horror metal band The Ghoulunatics. Long-time fans of the IWS, the Ghoulunatics have written a song about the Fans Bring the Weapons match called “Bestial Behaviour” which they have waiting for more than a year to play live before the actual match. They will get their chance on March 26th. Don’t miss this unique blend of music, wrestling and the most insane hardcore match ever presented in Canada! For more information on the band: http://www.ghoulunatics.com
The IWS is pleased to present Un F’N Sanctioned at le Medley 1170 St-Denis, Montreal, March 26th. Doors open at 7:30pm, Bloodstream starts at 8pm, show starts at 9pm. Card subject to change. VIP tickets are SOLD OUT. Regular Tickets are still available for $15 in advance or at the door. To purchase tickets in advance e-mail [email protected]. To purchase IWS videos or DVDs go to www.smartmarkvideo.com or e-mail [email protected]. For further information about the IWS got to our website www.syndicatewrestling.com
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The IWS on Tour
Combat Zone Wrestling: Liberated and Coming Full Circle: HellBound
Saturday, March 12th
Viking Hall, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Before the show started, IWS owner PCP Crazy F’N Manny was invited to the ring by CZW owner John Zandig to announce that the IWS would be joining an alliance with CZW, Chikara and IWA:MS. As part of that alliance, the IWS will travel to Philly to present a full show at Viking Hall as part of a double-header with CZW.
Beef Wellington beat Derek Frazier, Niles Young and Spyral to continue his momentum from his upset victory over Chris Hero at IWS BREAKOUT.
Franky the Mobster defended his IWS title and CZW Ironman title, beating Adam Flash. Franky got rave reviews for his charisma and for destroying a fan’s St-Patrick’s Day hat.
In what many fans called the Match of the Night, Sexxxy Eddy defeated the Arsenal in a violent brawl that included a sick swinging neck breaker onto a couple of steel chairs. After the match, Sexxxy Eddy announced that after tasting tag team gold in CZW and having it taken away from him without even being in the match, that he now wanted CZW singles gold.
Pro Wrestling Guerrila: The Ernest P. Worrell Memorial
Saturday, March 12th
Frank and Son’s, City of Industry, California
Kevin Steen qualified to face Super Dragon for the PWG title by winning a four-way match between himself, A. J. Styles, Chris Daniels and El Generico. Styles, the former NWA/TNA champion, took out El Generico with a neck breaker that left the Generic Luchadore unconscious. Styles allowed himself to be distracted by Chris Daniels however and while these long-time enemies brawled on the outside. Kevin Steen took advantage rolling the limp body of El Generico into the ring for the vulture pin to win the match.
In the main event, Kevin Steen came within an eye-lash of winning the PWG title when Super Dragon just barely kicked out of a Package Pile Driver. Described by fans as Kevin Steen’s “breakout match” in PWG, Super Dragon had to resort to using Kevin’s own finisher against him, pinning Kevin with the Package Pile Driver.
Zero-One
Tuesday, March 15th
Korakuen Hall, Tokyo, Japan
In his Japanese debut, in historic Korakuen Hall, Kevin Steen defeated Takashi Sasaki in 11:25 with the package piledriver. Steen said after the match that he wants to face Spanky & Tatsuhito Takaiwa to prove himself as a great wrestler to the Japanese fans.
-credit Kris Z, www.deathvalleydriver.com
El Generico
El Generico is busy touring Europe this week, performing for wXw in Germany and IPW:UK in England amongst others. I should have results to pass along as soon as his interpreter gets in touch with me and I will pass those along in the next IWS newsletter.
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Rumours have been swirling around that CZW was going to enter into partnership with another wrestling fed. Last night, John Zandig announced that CZW would be inviting not one but THREE different promotions to do joint double-header shows in Viking Hall. The three promotions being the lucha libre influenced Chikara, Ian Rotten's IWA-MS from the Mid-South of the US and Canada's International Wrestling Syndicate from Montreal.
Selfishly, this means that since I am the Time Keeper for the IWS, that I will be keeping time and ringing the bell at Viking Hall where ECW was born.
Please excuse me while I MARK THE FUCK OUT!
We will be announcing the date for the IWS/CZW doubleheader during our UN F'N Sanctioned show, March 26th at Le Medley in Montreal.
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Franky the Mobster Robbed of CZW Title
In front of just over 300 fans, Franky the Mobster came within a fraction of a second of pinning Ruckus to win the Combat Zone Wrestling world title last night during IWS BREAKOUT in Montreal to add to his International Wrestling Syndicate Title and his CZW Iron Man Title. Ruckus’ manager Robbie Mireno charged the ring wearing a referee shirt and clocked IWS referee Bakais to prevent him finishing the three count. Mireno then tried to bluff that Ruckus had won all three belts, but the match was ruled a no contest.
IWS BREAKOUT
Quick and Dirty results
Saturday, March 5th, 2005
Montreal, Quebec, CANADA
Bar Le Break
Dark Match: Player Uno beat Shinjiro Hashinoku (8:14)
2.0 (Jagged & Shane Matthews) beat Dan Paysan & Tomassino (11:09)
Dan took the pin after Tomassino attacked him and walked out
ExesS beat Evil Ninja (11:58)
According to the stipulations of the match, ExesS’ ten year contract with Commissioner Joseph FitzMorris is null and void. After the match, the Evil Ninja turned on the Commissioner.
Fred la Merveille beat Kid Kamikaze (10:54)
IWS Tag Title Match: The Flying Hurricanes (Takao and Kenny the Bastard) beat the Wrecking Crew (Tomassino and Chris Wells) (11:07)
Grudge Match: Damian beat his former best friend and tag partner Viking (9:19)
The crowd chanted «Match of the Year!» Viking was busted up the hard way by a running knee to the face. After the match, Fred la Merveille challenged Damian to a match and tackled Damian through the ropes to the outside where the two men brawled.
PCP Crazy F’N Manny, the co-owner of the IWS fired IWS President Seska and IWS Commissioner Joseph FitzMorris. Manny also invited previously fired Kurt Lauderdale and the Arsenal to the ring and invited them to have a match to convince him to rehire them.
Get Your Job Back Match: Kurt Lauderdale beat the Arsenal with the help of the Evil Ninja (working under Manny’s orders)(9:45)
After the match, Manny informed Kurt that he had won the right to wrestle in the IWS, but at the next IWS show (March 26th ¬ Un F’n Sactioned) he would have to wrestle in the most dangerous match in Canada, Fans Bring the Weapons, with Arsenal as his partner against himself and the Evil Ninja.
Beef Wellington, in an astonishing upset, beat Chris Hero (14:56)
Franky the Mobster vs. Ruckus was ruled a no-contest (16:16)
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Breakout Results Detailed
Before IWS Breakout started Player Uno and Shinjiro Hashinoku thrilled the crowd with a fast paced dark match. While Player Uno emerged victorious, Shinjiro had the crowd believing that he could win, including a thunderous two count that had beer spilling all over Le Break. Both of these rookies can only benefit from experience, but they are already veterans when it comes to getting the crowd involved in their matches. Player Uno won in 8:14 with a head-drop suplex.
Breakout began with a match featuring 2.0 putting their unbeaten streak on the line against Dan Paysan and Tomassino. Jagged and Shane Matthews kept their streak alive but it took a «Blue Ting» elbow pad, a bucket and most importantly Tomassino slugging Dan Paysan and walking out on his former boss. Before walking out though, Tomassino reminded people that he is one of, if not the tallest wrestler in Quebec rattling Jagged’s skull with an enziguri that hit with the impact of a flying guillotine. Dan Paysan was pinned after 11:09.
Despite massive interference by Commissioner Joseph FitzMorris, a motivated ExesS beat the Evil Ninja in 11:58 with a Spanish Fly that soared past a table set up in the corner. As a result of his victory, ExesS’ ten year contract with FitzMorris is null and void and ExesS was not required to spend the night with FitzMorris. After the match, Evil Ninja turned on FitzMorris, physically punishing the Commissioner but unable to put him through a table that simply refused to break.
Fred la Merveille began his match with Kid Kamikaze with an audition for Star Academie (the French version of American Idol.) A disgruntled Kid Kamikaze began a promo duel with Fred la Merveille, but Breakout was not Double K’s night as he lost both the promo duel and the match, falling to Fred’s «101» pedigree after 10:54. It should be said that the IWS’ self-proclaimed technical wizard had his chances to win this match, but the ring side presence of the massive Marc le Grizzly saved Fred la Merveille on several occasions. Backstage, Double K was heard to mutter that he needed to recruit some wrestlers to rebuild his Kid Kamikaze Experience.
The IWS tag team champs, the Flying Hurricanes had issued an open challenge for their belts. Taking up that challenge were Tomassino and his MWF tag team partner Chris Wells. Tomassino cemented his status as a thuggish monster at one point strangling Takao by tying him to the ring post by his mask. This was a tactical mistake, however, as Bakais was unavailable to count a three count while he was holding Takao up by the legs to prevent him from choking to death. A furious and unmasked Takao cleared Tomassino from the ring and power bombed his own partner on to Chris Wells from the top rope with the Unpredictable Motion to win the match after 11:07.
After the intermission (and a brief cat fight between D-Vyn dressed as IWS President Seska and the real Seska) two former tag partners, two men once close as brothers, Damian and Viking had a highly anticipated match.
Match is not the right word for what we were lucky to see. Fans chanted «Match of the Year» as the two men beat the ever-loving hell out of each other. It was a revelation. Nothing that Damian and Viking did to each other was complicated; everything they did to each other was done with a vicious precision that left Damian bleeding from slaps that left his chest looking like someone had dragged a razor sharp rake across it. Meanwhile, Damian busted Viking’s face open the hard way with repeated strikes to the face. Damian pinned Viking after 9:19 with a double knee stomp. It continued a streak of great matches by Damian since he turned his back on the SLI, Fred la Merveille and Viking, but it was Viking that truly won - winning the respect of the fans and huge «Viking» chants.
After the match, Fred la Merveille came to the ring and challenged Damian to a match at the Medley. When Damian agreed, Fred tackled him to the outside of the ring, the two men landing with a sickening thud and then brawling through the fans at ring side with a determined intensity.
IWS owner, PCP Crazy F’N Manny, came to the ring and continued his recent power trip, firing IWS President Seska, (blaming her for losing the IWS previous venue Unison) and first firing and then demoting IWS Commissioner Joseph FitzMorris to Ring Boy Supervisor. Surprisingly, FitzMorris eagerly accepted this demotion. Manny then offered two men that he had previously fired, Kurt Lauderdale and the Arsenal, a chance to get their job back in an impromptu «Get Your Job Back» match.
In their street clothes, Kurt Lauderdale and the Arsenal beat the hell out of each other with Kurt Lauderdale using his size and strength to pummel the Arsenal while the One Man War used chairs and a trash can to beat Kurt Lauderdale. In one astonishing moment, Kurt picked up the Arsenal for a power bomb, the Arsenal countered with a scissors hold and Kurt retaliated by repeatedly ramming the Arsenal’s head into a turn buckle upside down. Kurt Lauderdale seemed poised for victory when the Evil Ninja hit the ring. It looked like the Fan Favourites were reunited as the Evil Ninja and the Arsenal hit stereo «Pearl Harbour» top rope chair assisted leg drops on Kurt Lauderdale (although once again the table refused to sell the move.) But the Evil Ninja, acting under Manny’s orders all night long, attacked the Arsenal gave him a Tombstone Pile Driver and rolled a groggy Kurt Lauderdale on top of the Arsenal for the win after 9:45.
After the match, Manny continued the punishment, finally breaking the no-selling table putting the Arsenal through it with a Junkie Driver that sent shards of table flying in all directions. Manny also informed Kurt Lauderdale that all that he had won was the right to face him and the Evil Ninja in the most dangerous match in Canada: Fans Bring the Weapons!
Manny may have bitten off more than he could chew, however, especially since he made the Arsenal Kurt Lauderdale’s partner for the match. Giving two men with a reputation for violent behaviour permission to beat you half to death with weapons designed and constructed with sadistic glee by fans who also hate you! I have to ask: What is Manny thinking?
(Also, this just in from Kurt Lauderdale, «What do you mean HALF to death? This is not a red tag sale. I don’t do 50% in anything. Manny is going to die. Period. »)
In what has to be considered a major upset, Beef Wellington, the loveable loser of the IWS, pinned Chris Hero with a desperate variant of a back slide roll up after 14:56. But not before Chris Hero spent the match damn near ripping Beef’s leg off. The match was well received, putting the lie to the idea that the IWS fans have no patience for technical matches. Beef’s victory was greeted with a huge cheer that astonished even Beef.
In the main event of the evening, CZW champion Ruckus locked horns with IWS and CZW Iron Man champion, Franky the mobster. Normally, Franky is not a favourite of the IWS crowd, but the IWS crowd clearly preferred their champion to the intruder from Chocolate City. Ruckus’ manager, Robbie Mireno, made a pest of himself in the early going until Franky took him out with a suicide dive that caught everyone by surprise. Mireno was carried to the back, only to come charging out later in a referee shirt, slugging IWS official Bakais just before Bakais counted three on Ruckus. Mireno tried to bluff that his man had pinned Franky, but senior IWS official P-Nut declared the match a no-contest at 16:16.
It is very rare, almost unheard of, for an IWS main event to be thrown out. In this case, the blame must lie squarely on the shoulders of PCP Crazy F’N Manny who fired the two people who could have restarted the match, Seska and FitzMorris and left the show before the main event with the gate money to celebrate his birthday.
The IWS is pleased to present its next event, Un F’N Sanctioned, Saturday, March 26th, in the beautiful downtown Medley, 1170 St-Denis, Montreal. Main event will be Fans Bring the Weapons. The Medley shows are our biggest shows of the year and the ones where we pull out all the stops. VIP tickets for this event are sold out! Regular tickets are $15 in advance. For more information on this event, check out the IWS message board on the IWS web-site (www.syndicatewrestling.com) for daily updates or email [email protected] To purchase IWS tapes or DVDs, visit www.smartmarkvideo.com or email [email protected]
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IWS on Tour (results)
While Breakout was going on, IWS stars El Generico and Kevin Steen were making their debuts on the ROH main show and continuing to impress.
-Credit Death Valley Driver:
THE ROTWEILERS defeated RING CREW EXPRESS & EL GENERICO - Homicide hit the lariat on El Generico for the win in 8:45.
«RCE/Generico vs. Rotts was very fun and turned the show around. RCE looked awesome vs. Pittbulls, I'd actually love to see that now. Generico is a fucking phenomenon and very over in ROH thus far. Cide wasted him so badly with the lariat for the finish. Fun match and Generico again is OVER.»
AZRIEL won the SIX MAN MAYHEM MATCH by pinning B-BOY (Deranged, Kevin Steen, Izzy and Dixie were the other four) - Match was 11 minutes.
«6 Way match. I'll be honest. This won't be everyone's cup of tea, but I thought it was easily the best 6 way match in ROH ever. Just awesome stuff bell to bell. Everyone looked really great in there roles… STEEN~! was a bastard of killer high impact offense here. My god is his moveset deep and hurty lookin'. Deranged took the ridiculous clutched head overhead toss powerbomb that Steen busts out and gets kudos for that… Fun sprint.»
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http://www.syndicatewrestling.com/images/m...media/bsfeb.wmv
Our main event this Saturday, March 5th will be Franky the Mobster vs. Ruckus
with three titles on the line:
IWS title (Franky champion)
CZW Ironman title (Franky champion)
CZW title (Ruckus champion)
Detailed Results for IWS Devil's Night
in General Wrestling
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a) Kevin Steen could be an arrogant jack-ass who liks fucking with people.
b) he's a chicken-shit coward