Richard

You can close the thread now.

Damnit all to bloody hell!

Emilio Estevez - Mighty Ducks

your cousin

Change my name to "The Bowtie Killer".

Fuck em all. Especially the one in the white house.

Too bad they're not remaking Whore of the Worlds. smutty, 3 February 2003 Author: illustriousgeorge from Pennsylvania this movie was absolutely terrible. there was absolutely no redeeming value in it. i brought this film home for my children so i could show them the orson welles masterpiece and instead the video store had switched tapes on me. i hate them. a lot. my children are in therapy. 10 minutes of yinny has completely broken down their innocence. don't watch this film. it will ruin you. and your children.

http://67.18.200.59/bbmain1/bodyslam.wmv

Anyone see the classic episode? They showed the Andy Kaufman/Jerry Lawler match, and had Andy Kaufman's apology speech.

I would have gone with a laxitive myself.

Well at least you can jack off to the pictures. I guess you could jack it to Duff as well.

How can I get mouseover text to appear?

I'd rather see a son of the beach movie myself.

I just hope he doesn't call it something like Ridizzle on the Stizzorm.

I'd like to do a movie where the blue states secede from the union to form the Democratic States of America. Of course Bush won't let this happen without a fight, and the second civil war breaks out.

Most of those left on their own.

tell Goldylocks to suck your dick.

Vince may have hated Austin, but he loved the money he made off him.

UWE Rage wk 5 Styles, Tenay, & Berzerker welcome us to another action-packed episode. Before much else can be said, Clockwork Violence makes a grand entrance. Richards demands a standing ovation for the Universal Champion. Savage gloats over his demolishing of HBK, Shamrock, and Sting. This brings out Shawn Michaels who challenges him to a rematch. Matcho Man laughed at him but agrees to give Shawn a shot next week, if he can defeat Stevie & Orton in a handicapped match. Rey Mysterio admits to being intimidaded by New Jack, but he will do what he must do to keep the belt. 1. Falls Count Anywhere TV Title Match: Rey Mysterio© d. New Jack at 10:52 (*½) Konnan came out of the crowd and cracked a baseball bat over New Jack’s skull to help Rey retain. Paul London and Torrie Wilson come out as Konnan presents the new and improved Filthy Animals. Tenay announces that the Nasty Boys are no longer with the company due to personal issues. For more information, call the hotline. This means Blue Meanie gets a bye into the finals of the DDR tournament. Dance Dance Revolution Semifinal: It’s a close contest but La Parka defeats Dean Malenko. Afterwards, the masked figure hits the chairman with his own chair. Sean O’Haire rips on Scott Hall for being a druggie. He notes that there are plenty of other offenders in the back, including tonight’s opponent, the British Bulldog. Davey comes out and the match begins. 2. Sean O’Haire d. British Bulldog at 8:25 after ramming Smith’s head into an exposed turnbuckle. (**) Afterwards Sean chokes out Bulldog until Owen Hart comes to the rescue. Larry Zybysko cuts a promo for Kronik, who have a tag title shot next. 3. Tag Title Match: Midnight Horsemen© fought Kronik to a double dq at 13:26 when things get too out of control (**). Arn Anderson is injured by a botched High Times and will be out for awhile. KamalaPunk comes to the ring. CM Punk admits to not exactly being overjoyed with his new tag partner, but it’s just another obstacle to overcome. Kamala eats away at a huge slab of some unidentified animal. 4. Jerry Lynn d. Alex Wright with a cradle piledriver at 11:35 (**½). Dustin Vice is backstage trying to grow out his hair when CCC and Savio Vega approach him. CCC makes fun of his gimmick, as he is nowhere near as cool as Carlito. Dustin challenges the both of them to a tag match. 5. Sid d. the Mountie in a glorified squash at 3:13 (*½) Afterwards, Brian Pillman comes out challenging Sid to a match to see who the biggest psycho in UWE really is. It’s accepted. Barry Windham complains about not getting any tv time. Ken Shamrock says he can get in the ring with him next week. 6. Dustin Vice & Road Warrior Animal d. Los Boriculas Nuevo by dq at 5:03 when the Masked man chaired Dustin (**). Animal chased him off. HBK is giving an interview with Mean Gene when Barry Horrowitz interrupts to announce that he’s converted to Islam and will now be called Muhammad Ali Hussein. 7. Shawn Michaels d. Stevie Richards & Randy Orton at 11:03 when Shawn pinned Richards with a back suplex (***) HBK and Matcho Man stare down each other as the show ends. Next Week: UWE Title: Randy Savage© vs. Shawn Michaels Sid vs. Brian Pillman DDR final: Blue Meanie vs. La Parka

Free For All: David Flair d. Hardcore Holly when Pillman smacked Holly with a chair at 3:16(*) UWE First Blood Joey Styles and Mike Tenay thank us for ordering the show and introduce a special commentator for tonight, the legendary Superfly Jimmy Snuka. Snuka thanks the UWE Board for giving him work, as the job market is murder. 1. TV title #1 contenders Match: Brian Pillman d. Christopher Daniels & Jamie Noble at 12:34 when Pillman pinned Noble with the Air Pillman while Flair kept Daniels occupied outside the ring (***) 2. Sean O’Haire w/Richards d. Scott Hall at 10:42 when Richards nailed Hall with a steviekick (**1/4) 3. Caribbean Strip Match: La Parka d. Savio Vega at 11:23. This match had the usual strip match ending: Savio touched 3 corners unaware that La Parka (being dragged behind him) was also touching them. As Vega reached for the last corner, La Parka swung around and grabbed it first for the win (*½) A vignette of Paul Heyman’s newest charges Amazing Red and Ahmed Johnson is aired. The duo is at a crowded nightclub hitting on the ladies. Heyman (voiceover) brags that women will scream for Amazing Johnson. The announcers analyse the new team. Snuka bets they’ll be real ladykillers. 4. Sid Vicious d. Masa Chono by dq when Randy Orton attacked Sid at 6:32 (½*) British Bulldog makes the save. The announcers discuss the upcoming extreme rules match. Joey brings up New Jack’s two justifiable murders, which fails to impress Snuka. 5. Extreme Rules Match: Anderson, Eaton, & Lane w/ JJ Dillon d. New Jack, Saturn, & Lynn at 18:13. New Jack is arrested after accidentally hitting a fan with a chain, Saturn is out after a spike piledriver on the floor, and Lynn is tortured for awhile before finally being pinned at 24:12 (***1/2) 6. TV Title: Paul London© d. Rey Mysterio at 26:43 with the London Calling (***½) The duo embraced afterwards but the mood was dampened by Brian Pillman, who let London know that he was next. Backstage, Alex Wright walks around with a cocky smile on his face. He approaches Torrie Wilson and attempts to get in her pants, with no success. He turns to the camera and explains his new attitude. He has decided to emulate his hero, the “blond Tom Cruise” Zack Morris. He is approached by UWE official Allen Coage. Wright sweet talks him and attempts to get a title shot. Coage tells him he’s done nothing to earn a shot. Wright tries to figure out what Zack would do, and tells Coage he’s dying. Coage says that if he’s dying, then he must be too ill to wrestle. Alex decides that in order to be like Zack, he needs a Screech. He goes off to find his flunky. The announcers discuss what we just saw. Snuka says that Alex should’ve never let Torrie get away with that disrespect. Sometimes women need to be tought a lesson. 7. Dean Malenko d. Danny Doring at 11:14 when Doring tapped to the Cloverleaf (**½). Afterwards, JJ Dillon asks him to join his stable. Malenko says he’ll join when and if he’s ready and not a moment sooner. Dillon says he can’t force him, but he warns Dean that his boys don’t like being denied what they want. Tenay announces that due to their interference tonight, Clockwork Violence has been ejected from the arena. The Matcho Man will be on his own. 8. Universal Title Final: Shawn Michaels vs. Sting Vs. Randy Savage vs. Ken Shamrock Ken Shamrock blocks the Sweet Chin Music and reverses it into an anklelock to eliminate HBK at 14:47. Randy Savage hits 3 elbows to finish Shamrock at 20:25. Sting attempts a German Suplex but his back gives out and Savage is able to cover. However, the mystery man is distracting the ref. Savage makes the ref pay attention but this time Sting is able to roll him up for a pinfall and the UWE Championship at 37:03 (****). An enraged Matcho Man runs after the masked figure while Sting celebrates. The Announcers say farewell while Superfly says that doing this show was more fun than killing an old girlfriend, which he'd never do, but you know, hypothetically.

I've gotten a few calls from Arnold, but that's it.

you could still help Kerry win the popular vote.

Couldn't Heyman be considered a miserly Jew?

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