Toxxic

Muzz, we know you're chortling along with our parade of hilariousity. Hilariousness. Hilarity. Hilarity Clinton. Yeah.

That's spelling, not grammar. And it's not my gimmick. Or, indeed, my first language. So yah boo sucks to you, Landon!

I like him.

I call opening promo, since we're in MAH HOUSE~!

I think this says what needs to be said. And Clark is fast becoming more egomaniacal than self-centred now he's World Champion, good to see.

That's because he was like, fourteen. And a moron. EDIT: What do you mean he didn't work out for us! We have the recurring Ghost Machine gimmick to thank him for, our own version of the Conquistadores!

Right, jury says this isn't Pretzler. Unless Pretzler's nicked a photo of someone else for the profile, and set up a Livejournal in the Godfish name for the sole purposes of deceiving us. Which seems unlikely. So I can only conclude that the Godfish is a real, live n00b. I'm astounded. And wondering whether you're related to Pretzler.

What the freak are we doing at Wembley? Please note that we are in Britain, and I am so face here that I could spit on God's eye, crotch the Pope and steal Gandhi's teeth and I'd still be mega-over. I thank you.

But that's so much catchier!

Just saying, if you're trying to pull a gimmick of being more intelligent than your opponent, good grammar helps...

Definitely Pretzler. Dean Douglas says hi. Oh, and 'whomever it is', please.

I call ringer. No, better, I call Pretzler, even though the gimmick doesn't seem silly enough. ...but whether I'm right or not, welcome aboard!

That was a very very bad Jackass angle featuring three wrestlers playing bad practical jokes and coming down to the ring in shopping trolleys. With no relevance to anything or anyone, and looking kind of heelish even though they were meant to be face. It was awful, yes, but the actual Jackass guys weren't around.

What's so wrong with the Jackass guys laughing anyway? They could take a nutshot and laugh and it'd be believable (I haven't watched it in years, but that's my memory). As long as they were sort of selling WITH the laughing it'd work; they are people who do genuinely stupid and painful stuff, get hurt, but laugh about it. Hell, a mate of mine was getting the shit kicked out of him a couple of months back and he was laughing - that was because he was drunk, but it was severe enough that when he went to see a doctor they asked if he'd been hit in the back repeatedly with a baseball bat, and it was just feet kicking him. The TV show shows them to be insane masochistic types who seek out pain that most human beings go out of their way to avoid, it's not unreasonable to show them as, say, freaks of nature who just didn't happen to get into wrestling. That said I think it's an awful idea, but if you are going to do it and they are going to laugh, maybe you can save it by mentioning the above.

"Through my force of will and power which makes Olympus shake, I'm controlling the ages, time and space are bent to my will." MANSON is so awesome. Everyone pay homage to THE best promo writer alive today.

...Google also says the St. Pete Times Forum is in Tampa. Or, well, it took me to the St. Pete Times Forum website, which says it's in Tampa. Maybe St. Petersburg is just in Tampa, and not being American I just don't know that. Thought I'd throw it out there though.

How is Raven easy to screw up? The guy's great on the mic, and he might be getting on but there's few better when it comes to knowing how to construct a match. Granted his horrendous weight gain was problematic, but that occurred after they'd been misuing him badly for ages.

Much obliged.

I don't enjoy Khali's matches, but they've used him well up until meeting Cena. He's slow, lumbering and pretty damn boring, but he's visually impressive and covers for the fact that he can't bump by simply not bumping. Does this make for interesting matches? No. Does it make him look like a total badass? Yes. Until of course he meets my favourite wrestler of all time John Cena. Now, if he'd taken Cena out and won the title, held it for a few months while casually destroying all challengers and then finally lost it to Cena in a rematch, that would be one thing. Jobbing him out doesn't really achieve much, I don't think.

OK, the 'Hand That Feeds' video has been removed. Copyright laws, since they used the music? Whatever - did anyone manage to get hold of it? Cos I dearly want that, it was fucking hilarious.

Can I help it if my ass is wise? I happen to own an intelligent donkey. Now, if you'd called me a wisearse I'd be offended. Or, well, not. However, consider me suitably chastised.

How will that get us back on schedule when we're meant to be having shows on Wednesdays? Or will we be getting back on schedule after that? ...OK, I'll shut up now.

There was a storyline? I thought it just consisted of her slapping Gail Kim and some bad acting in front of Jarrett.

I'm not going to pimp this anymore, I just wanted to say that the site is now up and running, and I'd be interested to hear what people think of it; layout, idea, execution, whatever.

I have a new project called Audio Democracy, and we envision it as the future of music reviewing. Based at http://audio-democracy.com it's not currently 'live', but we're planning on launching on Monday 28th May 2007. At the moment an overview of what we do can be found HERE. Basically, we're a bunch of people reviewing music. Any music. It doesn't matter about the genre, it doesn't matter about the recording quality, it doesn't matter if the band or artist is big or small. However, we also have a few little features that we think will make us useful: *We accept tracks to review electronically. At the moment all submissions should go to [email protected], but when the site goes live people will be able to sign up for an account (for free) and then upload music directly to the site ready for review. Part of the reason we've done this is to cut down on the carbon footprint of all those CDs being burned, posted in envelopes, listened to once and then maybe never listened to again. No, it makes more sense to send the track via the internet, and it can be deleted from a harddrive once no longer needed. *However, those reviewed tracks don't just go away. No, they get streamed on Audio Democracy itself, so people reading the review can listen to the music at the same time. No more will people think "well, this writes them up as being OK but I don't know if they're my thing". They'll know. *Anyone can view the site, but registered users will be able to post their own comments and (if they want to get that involved) reviews in reply to the main review. That's why it's called Audio Democracy - we may be the reviewers, but that doesn't mean we know it all. Everyone gets a say, and if enough people think we're wrong we'll be shouted down. We're aiming to blur the lines between the critics and the audience (but please note that overly offensive or downright malicious comments will be deleted). *Every track gets rated... but not just by us. A registered user can vote on a track to put the average score up or down. *Bands/artists who've signed up for accounts will be able to put their upcoming gig and show dates up so people who've read the reviews and listened to the tracks will know where they can next see the band live. *We're also looking at becoming an iTunes affiliate so readers can buy the tracks straight from the website if they want to. That means readers can discover, read about, hear, find out gig dates of and buy tracks from a band on the same day, all in one place! We're hoping that enough people will start using Audio Democracy for us to become a real, vital tool in the world of music. Imagine if a record label starts looking through and sees a band they'd never heard of with a really high rating for their tracks, and hundreds of posts from people going "yes! I love this tune!". How about if a record label gets a demo that sounds interesting and can go "hmm, I'll see what the public says on Audio Democracy"? I don't really know if many of the people on here are at all involved in the music industry, in whatever level. However, I'm hoping that some of you might be in bands, or know people in bands, or know people involved in independent record labels, or something like that. Please, pass the word out because I really think that this could become a useful tool for such people... but the more people use it, and view it, and sign up to it to make their voices heard, the better it will be. "Audio Democracy - because everyone's a critic"