UseTheSledgehammerUh

See, "Win-Loss Standings" records do matter.

I love Santino selling each Women's Match like it's a PPV main event. Awesome, hope Triple H is ready to go cardio-wise. If so, can't wait.

I change the channel during the Divas match to find the Cubs are bringing in a pitcher named "Rocky Cherry". Gotta be a coincidence.

Who's the last male to be a diva manager...

Carlito actually pinned John Cena a few years ago on Raw, too, with help from Bischoff.

Cena is an Orton mark!

Cena's gone through unbeaten The Great Khali, the unbeaten Umaga, the combined threat of Rated RKO, the unbeatable Triple H, Shawn Michaels, mega-pushed Kurt Angle, the never-losing-the-belt JBL, Bischoff-backed Chris Jericho, and Masters in a "submission" match when he didn't have a submission finisher... And Randy Orton is a threat. Ha, Cena mocks Orton's legitimacy.

You're forgetting Umaga's next big PPV match opponent... You know, the guy he knocked out with the BUTT-ram to the steps... What I want on Raw: Coach announces "Cena and Candice Vs. Umaga, Cade, & Murdock." Regal flat-out says that the people don't want to see that and bashes Coach. Instead, Cena gets to pick two partners: He picks Mick Foley, who is still technically the unrecognized Hardcore Champion from last summer. He picks Lashley, the Uncrowned Champion. And BAM, you get a killer Foley/Umaga Hardcore IC Title Match setup for SummerSlam.

Kennedy did have a decent match with Batista at the Rumble, especially during a particular bad string of Batista matches, so I'll give him credit there. However, and I think this says a lot about Kennedy, the match was set up with a random "Beat the Clock" gimmick, and unlike the same set-up they gave to Bobby Lashley just this month, no one gave Kennedy a snowball's chance in hell of winning. Kennedy fell into "throwaway title defense" category, not unlike say Hulk Hogan facing Arn Anderson on Nitro. Kennedy's bumping I don't question, that's fine. It's his rather bland offense that I question. The "Lambeau Leap", while rather exciting, was A) something the WWE was obviously going to try to eliminate and B)only effective on guys that were either Kennedy's size or smaller. The Reverse Superplex he used on Crazy last week is equally as dangerous, and even harder to execute on large opponents. Add in the same basic offense (clotheslines, chinlocks, and neckbreakers) that seem to boggle down every guy Kennedy's size, and IMO, he's just generic, aside from being the only guy who gets to announce his own intro. The whole "...Kennedy!" speal, while unique, isn't exactly something that's interesting, just odd. But to put Kennedy, a guy who has done nothing in this business and came off like a complete and total asshole doing his pro-WWE website rants following Benoit's deaths and has had a cup of coffee in the big leagues, against a injury-free mega-draw like John Cena, who's delivered 3 promoted WM Main Event wins, has been the face of not only the WWE but also their title belt, and has gotten the best out of crowd-apathetic monsters like Umaga (at the time) and Khali is silly. Kennedy has reminded me of Chris Candido, and just because of the hair. He's good enough on the mat, a tad humorous on the stick, but I've just never found him terribly exciting in the ring aside from a killer top-rope finish. And there is a difference between being an "awesome" worker and having "awesome matches. John Cena is a solid worker that has awesome matches. That doesn't mean he's Chris Benoit or Shawn Michaels and can carry any sap to a great match. It means when he sticks to his positives, that being his selling, facial expressions, good-enough offense and occassional "holy shit" move, you're probably not going to be disappointed. Look at Jeff/Umaga from last night, that worked so well, as did Cena/Umaga, because Cena is an A+ seller who has amazing timing on his comebacks, much like Jeff was last night. Wrestling's a simple formula, and Cena understands the steak over the sizzle so well, that after taking a lot of critical shit from the IWC, a pretty large portion, while not buying Cena hats and cheering for him, still know, just like last night with Lashley, they're gonna get a good match.

Lillian explained the rules of the Texas Bullrope Match before the match. Pinfall or submission, and No DQ. WWE.com posted that unlike previous Bullrope Matches, the "Touch All Four Corners" rule had been dropped in favor of Pinfall/Submission for the Bash.

The Candice/Cena feud is obviously trying to cash in on the Chuck Taylor/Mickie Knuckles IWA Mid-South hilarity. Let's not forget the big elephant in the corner, folks. When do the "Jackass" guys show up?

Hey Jingus, you quoted me as saying Cena was an "awesome" worker. Despite never saying that. I love when people quote other people with words they never said. Nimrods. He's a fun worker. He has had awesome PPV matches all year. Argue that. What's Kennedy done this year? Besides get hurt AGAIN and then cut retarded promos. Kennedy was an average wrestler on the Smackdown roster that was filled with mid-card talents working 15 minute matches. There's nothing wrong with that, I like wrestling, but when you're lumped in with Matt Hardy, Finley, the not-yet-super-pushed Lashley, and the rest of the "not ready for Live TV" roster, it's easy to stand out. Now he's on the crowded Raw roster and is exposed for what he is: an average wrestler with some charisma.

Cena's a fun worker who has awesome PPV matches, brings out the best in opponents, has great facial expressions, is a company guy, and sells tons of merchandise. Thus, I say work on building the challengers up before you drop it. Triple H, Lashley, Kennedy, Booker, and Orton would all suck as champion. Triple H mega-reigns are played out. Lashley isn't a proven commodity. Kennedy isn't a very good wrestler and has no credibility. Booker's thing is played out. Orton just bores me.

John Cena will put over Bobby Lashley as the "uncrowned CHAMPION", leading to Hard Hittin' Coach making Cena and Lashley team up. I don't get how Candice will fit into the match at all.

"If FU stands for Fuck Up then you are correct" The Super FU Cena performed was executed flawlessly. Watch it again. Lashley was dropped squarely on his back. Cena doesn't do a Falcon Arrow. I thought the way he did this, just throwing Lashley up and having him land hard, was realistic and just SPLATTED Lashley's title hopes.

So awful. Why would Coachman/Regal/whoever put their #1 star who they don't really have any beef with in a handicap match, with his partner being a girl? Cena better reach the 1 year mark with this title reign. Give Batista the 2nd string strap at SummerSlam, or have Punk win the thing Nitro has. Cena's the best in the world and deserves to reach 365 with the strap, IMO. This "reports claim Orton to beat Cena" nonsense is making me mad. You'd think the WWE staff who send the TNA reports to Big Steph would say "Hey. TNA did this Match of Champions shit. It sucked."

Captain America vs. Batman Silver Surfer vs. Wolverine Kyle Rayner vs. Spider-Man Thor vs. Daredevil Wonder Woman Sucks

Aside from a spirited ending to Jeff/Umaga, the pretty fun Lashley/Cena spotfest, and Candice wrestling the match of her life in an actual passable Women's match, The Great American Bash was really boring. Matt and MVP were off on their timing and the match was disappointing. Sandman and Carlito was awful. Morrison and Punk was awful. The three-way had a couple cool big man spots but was rather boring. The cruiser match was decent, albeit heatless. I popped for the ending. King Booker's promo was God awful. Hardyz/Simmons/Candice promo was greatness. Orton/Rhodes was embarassingly bad for Orton selling his weak, slow shit. Nothing happened in this match at all. One of the most hideously dull "gimmick matches" from the 'E. "As I said it was like watching Bill Watts era WCW with Vader and Williams/Gordy beating everyone clean." WCW 1992 is probably the best time period ever for professional wrestling matches, you know? "What is the incentive for watching Punk go after Morrison when he's jobbed clean to the guy twice now?" Punk grabs a mic Tuesday. "Morrison. I've showed you straight edge. Now, you and me at SummerSlam. And I'll show you straight edge HARDCORE." ECW Rules, Morrison has some "set up" matches he easily wins against past ECW greats in no condition to compete. Punk takes the title at SummerSlam. Said ECW Legends and current wrestlers hoist him up, the new leader of the Extreme. "But Jeff/Umaga? Umaga has owned him in every match." It was a week-long build and random match that served to show off Umaga as a killer heel again against an over babyface bumping machine. It's not like Jeff and Umaga have this deep-seeded rivalry. Jeff won some random-ass 4-way and got a title shot. He lost. Next. Re: Punk/Morrison Finish Morrison did a shitty kick to Punk, who was in the air doing a springboard attack. The kick missed and alledgedly "got Punk on the knee" and Morrison simply hooked the legs and pinned him. Punk removed his kneepad post-match and said "You son of a bitch." Horrible ending. Made Punk look even WORSE since Punk stopped Morrison from doing the Money, Inc. chicken shit return to the locker room with the belt and get counted out technique. He then threw Morrison in the ring, did the spring board, got "kicked in the knee", and pinned. "Kane chokeslamming Khali" It wasn't very pretty. No air. It was basically Khali falling backwards. Batista and Kane got him up a bit when they put him through the table outside. Batista Spinebustering Khali was the move of the match, he got him way up for it.

I'm pretty sure the Cruiserweight Open is in the "Tag Team Turmoil" format, like what they did at No Way Out, a series of singles matches. The WWE.com preview for the match says Chavo is defending the title in "the same type of match he won it in."

I'm gonna go check the show out. The sports bar's pretty nice and last year's Bash was decent, aside from 30 minutes of watching Big Show in a wooden cage. I hope the backstage segments are at a minimum and the wrestling matches that need to deliver (Main Event, ECW, IC, US) do so.

Can people STOP calling The Great Khali a transitional champion? You come off as an idiot if you do. A transitional champion is someone the belt is passed to as a brief transition from one champion to another. KHALI DID NOT WIN THE BELT FROM ANYONE. IT WAS VACATED. If they wanted to "transition" the title to someone, such as Batista, THEY WOULD HAVE HAD HIM JUST WIN IT. More people watch Smackdown than order PPVs. Thus, if the plan was the bridge some gap and get the belt from Edge to Batista, they'd have done it. They're obviously more happy with Batista chasing the title than holding it, and if they wanted him to win it, he'd have won it. Khali's the World Champ. Deal with it, it's wrestling!

I'm trying to convince myself this show is worth driving an hour to a sports bar with a friend to see. BAD: Sandman/Carlito is one of the best stories they have. Sadly, neither guy can really deliver outside of a "no DQ" environment. Carlito has to win here, right? 8 minutes. Blah. Candice and Melina are not very good. Jeff Hardy's been pretty solid and Umaga's rather entertaining but I'm not feeling this bout, as they've done it twice before, Umaga eventually winning out despite a late Jeff rally. No way they drop the belt off Umaga so expect the same old formula. The only thing more boring and stagnant than Randy Orton is when he's booked with a senior citizen in a tired, outdated gimmick match. John Morrison, whatever his new awful gimmick is supposed to represent (1990's MTV VJ?), is still quite awful, and I'm sure his latest heatless feud with CM Punk will be the latest in the never-ending ECW matches that no one cares about and aren't quite sure why it's happening. I'm sure they'll do a few flips and some chain wrestling, but booking wise Morrison has to retain and there's no sugarcoating that by retaining, no one wins. Cruiserweight CM Punk as a "World Champion" is just as bad. Kane, Batista, and Khali just screams "uppercuts, forearms, and choking" for 15 minutes. GOOD: Give MVP and Matt fifteen minutes and I will like the match, these guys are used to working together now, should be fun. Cena and Lashley should have really good heat and both guys usually deliver memorable "big time" matches so I'm diggin' the title bout.

"Voting is open today till Thursday at 11 pm Eastern time." Okay people enough joking, let's get Jamie Madrox into the next round. I think he just got a teammate pregnant.

That fucking sucks. I knew him a bit, years ago, and he was a pretty nice guy who was always up for anything. Very entertaining member of The Eliminators. The "sizzle" to Saturn's "steak" in the team, IMO, before weight issues really held him down. But a fun "sizzle" that was busting out the Firebird Splash and all kindsa fun offense. Although, despite not having the best body, the guy could fly and had some entertaining singles contests in the Dub as well. So here's to Kronus and his goofy laugh. R.I.P.

Are you crazy? Khali can actually bump. And has had decent matches with someone on a PPV main event, multiple times. He's carryable. Gigante just knocked Flair around with a few shoulderblocks and would get DQ wins from Horsemen-ference. Jay Leno was a better worker than Gigante.