The Mandarin

:: spits :: Well you won Raw last week, do I win it this week? Hands down. More like "hands repeatedly making chopping motions towards chest".

*calls number* *gets Val Venis' cell phone*

Hey, it's our creator!

Speaking of which, RVD needs one where he sticks his hand out in front of his face, wiggles his fingers, pulls it back and mouths "HOLY SHIT".

Holy shit, that kid got to get free swag, meet Mick Foley AND Vince? You awful bastard.

This is honestly the worst Raw ever put on at MSG.

Shades of Armageddon 2003! (taking an awkward tumble out)

..or like Hurricane and Gregory Helms. Let's see who gets THAT reference.

Bischoff: "That's the magazine where she takes her clothes off and you get to see Chris Benoit's face!"

Walken: "..and then I hid the steel chain up my ass for two years. So now, Kane, I give it to you." Kane: "Why didn't you just give me the chain in the first place?"

Christopher Walken is going to come out and dance.

Wow, I think they had to bring Randy out early because Benoit was out of it. I think Flair slipped something in his Kool-Aid.

vs. Raven vs. Big Show (WM X-7) vs. Undertaker (WM XX) vs. Kurt Angle (WM X-8) vs. D-X (WM 2000) vs. Undertaker (WM XIV) vs. Triple H (WM XV) Wow, Kane's WM matches have SUCKED. None topping **.

OU STYLE PHYSICALITY Boomer Sooner!

HBK watched Rush Hour the other day, I see. "Wipe yo'self off bitch. You dead."

What?

Give me specifics or I'll punch my grandmother.

..and liked it."

Booker T losing to Triple H at 'Mania was such a disappointment. Not the only case of the night in which the wrong man went over, though. WCW did it right, they had Bam Bam lose to Goldberg in the end.

"Teen Angel" is the most hilarious attempt at a sad song I've ever heard, but that's 40 years ago for ya'.

I dunno. He's trying to be JFK, so he has a brother-in-law in California and a cousin in Massachusetts. I'd say he has a hot actress on the side, too --- but, come on. -=Mike Lily Munster wasn't all that hot looking.

I would POSSIBLY trade Rock/Hogan for Austin/Rock at X-7, but that's a very slim chance.

Wait..now I remember Big Show being managed by Trish Stratus, and being best friends with Billy Gunn, and Vince McMahon saying "shit on a stick". Then I go blank.

Don't forget he vanished off TV between late September and early November 2000, returning just in time for a title shot. He also accidentally took time off between Royal Rumble 1994 and Summerslam of that year because he forgot to update his 1993 calendar, thinking Rumble 1994 was the middle of August. True story.

Scores updated on page one.