I've had alot of drunken crazy nights, sooo many I could share and you guys would be like, "what the fuck?". Hell I could make a movie on all the stories I have, but if I had to narrow it down to just a single story, it would be this one:
This one night last year me and 2 other friends, we'll call them Rob and Will, were drinking at the bar. We got completely shitfaced, we must've drank 12 jugs of beer between the 3 of us, as well as a lot of jagerbombs. It got so bad that waitresses cut us off, so we ended up leaving the bar, so we called a cab. Anyway we went into the parking lot, and a huge brawl broke out between group of east indians and asian guys. So me and Will decided to get into the cab as soon as we can, while my dumbass friend Rob was stumbling around the parking lot watching them brawl. We knew the cops were going to be there any miniute and I didn't want to deal with the cops when I was that drunk because I knew I was going to say something stupid to them and most likely go to the drunk tank. So I get into the cab and as we got in I saw some Native-American guy in the front byside the cab, we arranged to split the cab with him, so I yelled to rob to get in the cab. Rob looks at me with this strange look and said, "I'm not going into the cab unless... I SIT IN THE MIDDLE!" So I was like whatever, I get out and he gets into the middle and we drive off.
Then my friend Rob looks at the cab driver, "you're taking me where I wanna go!", and then looks at the Native-American guy, "AND YOU'RE FUCKING PAYING FOR IT!". The cab driver pulls over, and says "What are you talking about? Get out of my cab right now!". Then all of the sudden my friend grabs the cab driver and starts shaking him, "TAKE ME WHERE I WANNA GO RIGHT NOW, BEFORE I BUST MY GAT ON YOU!" Me and Will both looked and each other and looked at Rob, because we knew he didn't have a gun. Rob is problay the biggest teddy bear there is, he's a big fat guy but he's not a fighter at all. I've kicked his ass numerous times, but whatever. Then Rob looks at me and Will and gives us a silent siginal. So me and Will both decided to shut up, and not say anything because I was drunk and wanted to see where this was going for my own amusement.
Anyway the cab driver was scared shitless and drove off. Rob ends up taking us to the Cecil Hotel. Posters who are from Calgary like Captain of Outer Space, and Zetteberg is God can vouch for me when I say you don't want to be hanging out at the Cecil Hotel in Downtown, Calgary. It's basically the drugspot where it is filled with drug dealers and crackheads. So anyway we get there and me and my friends get out and the Native guy stays in the cab. My friend rob gets out, and slams the door and yells, "Fuck you, you stupid cabbie!" then boots in a huge dent in his door. The cab says "That's it! I'm calling the cops! You threatend my life, you booted a dent in my door!", and Rob think's he's all gangsta, says, "I don't give a fuck you punk ass bitch! Call the cops!" Just as he said that, this huge black crack dealer who was atleast 6'10", he looked like fucking Shaq with my beer googles on walks up to Rob and says, "BRINGING HEAT TO MY TURF DAWG?" Rob turns around and the crack dealer knocks Rob right on his ass with a single punch. I won't lie, I was laughing because Rob deserved that shit. But then the crack dealer whistles, and just then 20 guys come rushing towards Rob, and they start stomping him. Then my and Will grabbed Rob by his shirt out of the pile of the guys beating him up and told him to run.
So anyway Rob finally got out and started running, then me and Will caught up. The 1st thing Rob says to me and Will, "OH I COULD'VE TOOK THEM ALL!" Then pounds his fist into his palm, I just started shaking my head. Anyway we ended up catching another cab so we can go to Rob's house pass out. So we get into the cab, the 1st thing Rob says, "If you can take me to my house in 10 mins, I'll pay you $10,000!!!!!!!" So the cab starts speeding but he never reached the house in 10 mins, I was actually timing it, it was more like 17. So we got off at Robs house and Will paid for the cab and didn't tip the cab driver. So the cab driver rolls down his window and says, "Hey where's my tip?" then Rob looks at him, and says "THE ONLY TIP YOU'LL BE GETTING, IS THE TIP OF MY DICK!" And thats how the eventful night ended.