Jingus

Okay then, we're talking bout different things. Mercifully we managed go get through that dark patch without radioactive armaggeddon.

Craziest? I dunno, there's been various times when alcohol was chugged and felonies were committed. Felonies which I'm pretty sure haven't passed their statute of limitations yet, so they shall not be discussed. Instead, I'll share the first time I got drunk. Unlike just about everyone in this country, I actually never drank until I was 21. There was a wrestling show held at a nightclub, which featured several workers I was buddies with. (The nightclub itself was kind of ghetto and regularly featured gang violence, but I didn't know that at the time. I was just confused as to why the security guards insisted I had to tuck in my shirt.) I ended up getting into the VIP lounge by complete accident, and ended up sucking down twelve Zimas while discussing booking andpromotional tactics with the equally drunken boss of the wrestling show. At least the club employees took it in good humor when I puked on the floor on the way out, I didn't get my ass kicked or anything. And then I stared the demon of DUI in the eye for the first time. Fortunately I had a friend who lived close by, but even just driving for ten minutes at 40 mph down a totally straight road was a pretty nerve-wracking experience. The next day, I was not only hung over, I was still drunk until around noon. See, I told you that virginity wouldn't last long.

Everyone who made those decisions? Also dead and gone. I'm not talking about policy half a century ago, I'm talking about the difference between 1945 and now.

Since when do parents have any control over schools teaching their kids things the parents don't like? I'm sure that fundamentalists aren't happy about their children learning about evolution and prehistoric geology. Equally sure that racists would object to the schools trying to teach racial harmony and how we should all just get along. Also sure that some of your more hardcore Muslims and others who believe in the oppression of the female gender aren't happy about schools telling their kids that girls can do anything boys can do. Conspiracy theorists must hate every single thing their child ever hears in history or government classes. And you know what? Tough shit. Individual beliefs do not dictate government policy. If you care that much, put your kids in private school or homeschool them. Gays are hurt more by not getting married than straights ever could be by the opposite.

As it stands, the American military would absolutely squash any other country in the world if we actually had a conventional war with someone. Russia, China, doesn't matter, we'd win. It's a great deterrent, at least to anyone who's not as arrogant as the various third-world dictators out there who seriously think that nobody can beat them. Problem is, conventional wars are few and far between these days. No matter how much shiny new equipment you have, it can only help so much when you step into a cowpie of ongoing civil wars (Iraq, Vietnam, etc) and try to police the situation. On the other end of the spectrum an unhealthy number of people out there have various kinds of WMDs, which pretty much take the chess board of conventional warfare and set it on fire. I hate this mindset. Firstly, everyone was involved in the decision to nuke Japan are all dead. Secondly, we spent an absolute fortune of money, time, and effort in building that country back up after we knocked it down. Thirdly, back then we really didn't know what kind of horrifying long-term consequences that nuclear weapons cause over the long term, and learning that information has greatly changed our policies. Finally, it was such an entirely different situation from anything that's happening today that it's not a fare comparison. The war was much bigger and the nukes were much smaller; way more people were killed in Dresden and Tokyo with regular bombs than died by atomic fire. Today, a single one of our ballistic missle submarines could literally wipe Japan off the face of the planet. When the stakes got so much higher, the rules changed about how and when using nuclear force was considered necessary.

No drug does that. TV writers don't know how "truth serum" works.

We've got one in our garage, but mostly only because we've also got every other tool and hardware known to man. Except for a chainsaw. Always wanted a chainsaw, dammit. As for the TV-14 bashing, it's actually just Vince going back to his old argument. Before the Attitude era, the WWF in outside interviews would constantly knock NWA/WCW for being overly violent and adult. This even went so far as to criticize things which weren't violent and adult but just claimed to be, like the first Uncensored ppv.

One especially funny thing is that Jack might actually be the only guy in that locker room who's actually smaller than Juventud.

Holy shitballs, this season is making me feel the urge to do things like post lolcat jpegs with Epic Win captions in this thread. Tonight was just perfect from beginning ("...aaandit'sgone!") to end ("We thank our saviour..."). Fan-fucking-tastic.

It's already been stated, but I feel the need to repeat that we have this same thread every fucking year. What.

I saw Ju-on and Ringu and wasn't terribly impressed with either one; I didn't think Ju-on was at all scary, and personally I thought the stuff they changed for the American remake of The Ring made it better. Also recently caught some J-horror movie I'd never heard of called The Black House which was okay but forgettable. But I did really like Audition, that was one incredibly creepy movie. If you count Oldboy as a horror movie, that's a great one too.

I think I might've bought a lottery ticket once or twice, that's about it. Never been to a casino, never saw the point. You can play cards at home for free; why drive someplace to almost certainly lose money playing cards? I've heard people talk about the thrill of risking it all, but it's not my kind of thing.

That... doesn't even make sense. They crashed on the island three years ago, and only afterwards did they have wacky Dr. Who adventures; why would they remember when they were younger about what their older selves did? This isn't Slaughterhouse Five here, it's basic Terminator time-jumping.

That is pretty much the obvious answer. But maybe there's a "genie won't let you wish for more wishes" firewall of some kind. Given that? I'd spend a couple minutes on the grassy knoll finding out who killed JFK, and then go rob a bank and become a millionaire.

...that's actually not a bad answer. I don't have anyone in my family that I really hate, just mostly a bunch of weirdos with all their various personal eccentricities. Like, my dad does indeed own multiple Ann Coulter books, but at least he never tries to preach any of that shit at me. The most annoying ones are some odd rich cousins who are real snooty and strangely distant from the rest of the human race. The last time I saw them (Christmas at grandma's) they were literally all lying together on one couch like a big puppy pile. These people live in a mansion, yet the five of them felt the need to all squeeze together onto enough space for only two or three people to sit comfortably. I dunno man, you tell me what their deal is.

So basically it's a mash-up of all the very worst ideas that M. Night Shyamalan ever had? Awesome. I like this "Smues dies for our sins by going to watch some shockingly horrible movie, and then resurrects to come back and bitch about it at length" deal. Also, nothing new there about Ebert, the man gave Anaconda three and a half stars, sometimes he just falls in love with some bullshit.

One of my favorite Flair "...what?" moments was during the Russo feud, which did of course have a lot of such moments. Flair came out to cut this blistering promo on Russo, making fun of him for being a punk who always wanted to be a wrestler but could never cut it. Except for one thing: stapled on right at the front was a frigging political correctness ass-covering. Flair mumbled something to the effect of "none of what I am about to say is intended to denigrate the Italian people". This was before he was impersonating Russo's parents saying "But-a Vinnie, you don't got-sa no muscles!". I know that some Turner executive probably forced him to add that disclaimer to the beginning, but Flair couldn't figure out a way to deliver it and it derailed an otherwise great promo. WHAT? I never saw THAT part. Is this stuff on Youtube? ...we really need to get our We Watch Shitty WCW And Weep Together club back going again.

It is possible to have good dubbing; take a look at any of Sergio Leone's spaghetti westerns. Usually, Eastwood and Van Cleef were the only guys on the set actually speaking English, but the finished result is still tolerable and there's not much noticable lip-flap. Or check out the American release versions of Hayao Miyazaki's anime movies; even discounting their all-star vocal lineups, they're just plain well-done on a production level. So I'm confused as to why almost nobody else can ever get it right. Of course, some subtitled versions can be pretty awful too. Ever seen a subbed version of, say, a Godzilla flick or some of John Woo's earlier action movies? It goes beyond simple spelling or grammatical errors with the classic mangled interjection "Damn up!" being an old favorite among my friends back in college. In Bullet in the Head, at one point we can clearly hear what some American soldiers are saying in English, and the English subtitles are mistranslating what they said! But still, obviously, for a movie like Let the Right One In where so much of the movie's impact hinges upon the fine quality of the acting, the subtitles are preferable to any dubbing. Whatever film executive who decided to make the dubbed cut the default setting is probably also one of those choads who brags about having never read an entire book after graduating from school.

Rotates, eh? D'oh. I was trying to think of complicated solutions involving large sections of floor which raised or lowered on hydraulic lifts or something along those lines. Or in theory they could've just composited it with some really slick CGI. But yeah, I guess rotating makes the most sense. They would have to have those two sets built right next to each other and it would still be a complicated setup; you'd literally have to construct the entire set in that manner specifically to get that one shot. Seems like a lot of work.

Well whaddya know, it DID get good. After the first five episodes' dithering and killing time with boring Crises Of The Week plots, Dollhouse decides to grow up a bit. Let's hope they continue on this path. And not just in the plot, though that was taken to the next level with Departed-style rats and traitors on every side. I mean it felt like they finally dealt with the issues underlying the concept of the show, especially the sexual aspect of it so many people have been complaining about. The news interviews with the people on the street delved into it one way, the handler raping Sierra was another, the whole weird Patton Oswald angle was a third view on it, Victor luvs Sierra is a fourth, FBI Guy luvs Echo est #5. A few things which I did note: -Finally, some comedy which seemed like it was actually written by Joss Whedon and not by someone trying to copy his style. "PORN!" -It took 'em a while, but they finally made the FBI guy interesting. Not just the romance with the neighbor/doll, but also making him one bad motherfucker, able to take down damn near anyone with his bare hands. -But oh dear Lord I hope they never play that awful techno music again that was in the background of his fight with Echo, that was some musical waterboarding right there. -For a brief moment I thought they were going the "supervillain kills superhero's girlfriend and stuffs her body in the fridge" route with the neighbor lady. I was ready to get all pissed off at that particularly tacky cliche. Fortunately, by now Whedon is more than good friends with that tacky cliche, and by now is familiar enough with it to set us up to expect Tara getting shot again and then subvert it. -Did anyone else notice that bizarre shot near the end? DeWitt and blond guy walk out of her office, into the elevator, camera stays with them without cutting away... and they walk out of the elevator into the main Dollhouse set. Except, there's no way that could've possibly been a real elevator ride, there wasn't enough room for the camera crew and lights and everything to ride along with them. How the hell did they do that?

Are we in a karaoke bar? If not, I grimace and politely ask you to shut the fuck up.

Fresh? Yeah, because the last time they wrestled was seventeen years ago. They're basing the feud off stuff that none of today's fans will remember unless they've happened to read Have A Nice Day. I just don't see how these two guys can do much together in 2009. They've had a few good matches since the turn of the millenium, though they always needed the other guy to carry them at least a little bit. Foley hasn't had a good non-hardcore singles match since I don't know when, and Sting's good matches all involved more athletic guys who were decades younger. Foley doesn't have the physical ability to keep up in a Main Event Style Match like Sting had with Angle or Jarrett or Joe, which pretty much leaves one avenue left: weapons and/or blood. Sting flirted with hardcore stuff during the Abyss feud, so maybe he'll do it, but I still have a hard time imagining the match being very good. Especially not helping is the fact that it's at Lockdown, and the cage will greatly limit their options in terms of brawling spots. And finally, well, TNA has a pretty lousy track record with its PPV booking recently, relying more and more on screwjobs even in the uppercard matches; hopefully that won't be the case here, but the writers have kept getting worse about that shit. I still wanna see the match, out of curiousity if nothing else. I just don't have much hope for it being anything special.

Black Freighter and Under the Hood are already pirated at the usual websites, though I don't know when they go on sale. You'd think they'd try to coincide that sort of thing with the release of the actual movie.

None of them have been spectacular. Once I finally got Gary to actually talk to me, we pretty much resolved things like Victorian gentlemen and went "Good day, sir!" and that was the end of it.

I was wondering that too. Elimination by pinfall? Over the top rope of the cage? Reverse battle royal? Why do these things always have to be so complicated. I know that Foley is always a good company man wherever he works, but c'mon, claiming that Lockdown will be bigger than Wrestlemania? Especially when no matter how well Sting and Foley do in that cage, they're still not gonna beat Shawn Michaels and Undertaker for the title of "best PPV match between two middle-aged men in the month of April". Taking shots at the other company when you're finishing in such a distant second place feels like desperation, or sour grapes, or maybe just plain ol' delusional hallucinations. Who is booking the women's division, and how can I meet them in order to slap them with a dead fish in a rolled-up newspaper? STOP the stupid "Beautiful People cut hair off every female who's a better wrestler than them" gimmick already. I do find it ironic that somehow the WWE still refuses to ever do a Wargames match, when even TNA is doing them every year (under a different name) and often not doing them badly.