Man Who Sold The World

I notice when females orgasm, it usually lasts a few minutes. What would happen if we (us men) busted for a full _FIVE_ minutes? Would we even get that spunk out of the bed sheets? Would spare towels and bandanas and trash can bins need to be stored as we flutter out our white paste like a water hose? I mean think about it, Five Minutes! I bet you could cover the whole face of a woman in five minutes. I guess it's good for the pores too, or so I've heard. Five minutes. I keep referring to Scary Movie when I think about it. Would we get dehydrated like when you drink alot of tequila? Discuss.

Michael Jackson videos trip me out when I'm stoned (see "Speed Demon", "Leave Me Alone") and this Final Fantasy movie I watched recently was good while I was stoned. Other than that, I'm usually up for Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Bad Boys II, Running Scared, or a good standup comedy show.

"Fuck me? Fuck you! Fuck you and this whole city and everyone in it. Fuck the panhandlers, grubbing for money, and smiling at me behind my back. Fuck squeegee men dirtying up the clean windshield of my car. Get a fucking job! Fuck the Sikhs and the Pakistanis bombing down the avenues in decrepit cabs, curry steaming out their pores and stinking up my day. Terrorists in fucking training. Slow the fuck down! Fuck the Chelsea boys with their waxed chests and pumped up biceps. Going down on each other in my parks and on my piers, jingling their dicks on my Channel 35. Fuck the Korean grocers with their pyramids of overpriced fruit and their tulips and roses wrapped in plastic. Ten years in the country, still no speaky English? Fuck the Russians in Brighton Beach. Mobster thugs sitting in cafés, sipping tea in little glasses, sugar cubes between their teeth. Wheelin' and dealin' and schemin'. Go back where you fucking came from! Fuck the black-hatted Chassidim, strolling up and down 47th street in their dirty gabardine with their dandruff. Selling South African apartheid diamonds! Fuck the Wall Street brokers. Self-styled masters of the universe. Michael Douglas, Gordon Gecko wannabe mother fuckers, figuring out new ways to rob hard working people blind. Send those Enron assholes to jail for fucking life! You think Bush and Cheney didn't know about that shit? Give me a fucking break! Tyco! Imclone! Adelphia! Worldcom! Fuck the Puerto Ricans. 20 to a car, swelling up the welfare rolls, worst fuckin' parade in the city. And don't even get me started on the Dumb-in-i-cans, because they make the Puerto Ricans look good. Fuck the Bensonhurst Italians with their pomaded hair, their nylon warm-up suits, and their St. Anthony medallions. Swinging their, Jason Giambi, Louisville slugger, baseball bats, trying to audition for the Sopranos. Fuck the Upper East Side wives with their Hermés scarves and their fifty-dollar Balducci artichokes. Overfed faces getting pulled and lifted and stretched, all taut and shiny. You're not fooling anybody, sweetheart! Fuck the uptown brothers. They never pass the ball, they don't want to play defense, they take fives steps on every lay-up to the hoop. And then they want to turn around and blame everything on the white man. Slavery ended one hundred and thirty seven years ago. Move the fuck on! Fuck the corrupt cops with their anus violating plungers and their 41 shots, standing behind a blue wall of silence. You betray our trust! Fuck the priests who put their hands down some innocent child's pants. Fuck the church that protects them, delivering us into evil. And while you're at it, fuck JC! He got off easy! A day on the cross, a weekend in hell, and all the hallelujahs of the legioned angels for eternity! Try seven years in fuckin Otisville, Jay! Fuck Osama Bin Laden, Alqueda, and backward-ass, cave-dwelling, fundamentalist assholes everywhere. On the names of innocent thousands murdered, I pray you spend the rest of eternity with your seventy-two whores roasting in a jet-fueled fire in hell. You towel headed camel jockeys can kiss my royal, Irish ass! Fuck Jacob Elinski, whining malcontent. Fuck Francis Xavier Slaughtery, my best friend, judging me while he stares at my girlfriend's ass. Fuck Naturel Rivera. I gave her my trust and she stabbed me in the back. Sold me up the river. Fucking bitch. Fuck my father with his endless grief, standing behind that bar. Sipping on club soda, selling whiskey to firemen and cheering the Bronx Bombers. Fuck this whole city and everyone in it. From the row houses of Astoria to the penthouses on Park Avenue. From the projects in the Bronx to the lofts in Soho. From the tenements in Alphabet City to the brownstones in Park slope to the split levels in Staten Island. Let an earthquake crumble it. Let the fires rage. Let it burn to fuckin ash then let the waters rise and submerge this whole, rat-infested place!"

Nah, I think I had the best card.

I'm down for a collab. I've been writing alot between posting here and working night shifts, so I believe my material has stepped up. I slowed down on my topical writing and just went for the straight up 16's. Let me know what's up.

Wanna make money? Wanna go to fancy parties? Check this out! How would you like a dream job? A job with financial security AND benefits? I'll buy you clothes, put you up in fancy motels, and you'll also recieve a monthly PAYCHECK! "What do I have to do, Rick_James?" It's SIMPLE! All you have to do is.... _BE MY BITCHES!!!_ That's right! Isn't that easy? "It sure is pimp." I'll place you on a date with a member of the opposite sex (same sex differs on wages) where you'll end up at one of my fancy motels! You'll get paid and laid, baby! She gives you $1,000, you WILL see 10% or less! Do not miss this great opportunity to make wages and earn a living HIGH up in the whore business! KOAB, spots are open! And if I ain't get my money, you gettin' baby powder slapped!

Czech's heel rant?

Yo - could I get a cold beverage? I need some leverage It's sweaty outside Some lemonade would be nice Or a sprite from the drive-through At B.K. Yo I'll buy a girl a drink But girls got to pay On the front porch yeah I got some ice tea If you like a taste of tea Then come along with me Summertime is steamin' Don't give me no worries Grab some ice and a dash of vermouth It's martini time Yeah yeah feeling golden Bring your own beverage Just make sure it's cold I like cold beverage yeah (3 X) Uh huh Give me frosty mug Filled with A & W If you got ice cream Then make it a double scoop Milkshake from the fountain Real good sounding Chocolate egg cream Yo, I'm champ cherry pounding Caught a chill vibe Orange juice in my ride Wawa's to the right They got beverage inside Buy me a hot coffee Then fill it up with ice Watermelon's like a drink Please fix me a large slice Summertime is cool the heat is getting old Yeah I'll have a beverage Just make sure it's cold Cold, cold, cold, cold ...(Need something from the bar?) I like cold beverage, yeah (3 X) 'Cuz I'm feelin' kinda thirsty Stick it in the fridge, stick it in the fridge Stick it in the fridge, stick it in the fridge (2 X) Go girl work the cold one (4 X) Yo, when I'm fishing Let's keep one thing clear The bait's over there The brew's right here Two six packs and a big bag of ice Didn't even catch a bite But the brew tasted nice Back to the bar Strawberry daiquiris and a colada I need a whole lotta them Fruit drinks to catch me a buzz I must tell you I'm the Cool-Aid kid Before you serve me a drink Please stick it in the fridge I like cold beverage yeah

For shooting black tar heroin. Wow. I used to think it was a running joke when I'd ask him if he wanted a burger and he'd be like "No, I think I'll get lit." Like he was comparing addictions. Heh.

[belly-aching, roof-top jumping, five minute orgasmic, uncontrollably crying out loud unable to breathe laugh!]

WRESTLEMANIA : THE LAST CHANCE MAIN EVENT #1 Hulk Hogan vs Steve Austin Everyones WrestleMania match MAIN EVENT #2 The Rock vs John Cena Just imagine the promos. RAW WORLD TITLE MATCH HHH vs Edge SMACKDOWN WORLD TITLE MATCH Batista vs Lashley (who wins the Rumble) Kane vs OOOOOMAGA LEGEND KILLER VS HARDCORE LEGEND Randy Orton vs Sabu Shawn Michaels vs Johnny Nitro TAG TEAM TITLES MATCH London/Kendrick vs Pitbulls Hardy Boyz vs Finlay/Regal ECW WORLD TITLE Rob Van Dam vs CM Punk The Undertaker vs Chris Benoit MONEY IN THE BANK Sylvester Terkay vs Shelton Benjamin vs Carlito vs Haas vs Rey Misterio vs Kurt Angle Those two main events are WWE's last hope for a big buyrate. I'd actually buy this pay-per-view.

DIP-SET!

I think you would like that. Very Much.

ah. Still we probably bumped into each other, I'm over in Lakewood all the time. I'll be there tomorrow at Comcast Studios.

There's more than one? The tall dood, he goes to Long Beach State, promotes parties. Used to be on the Wilson basketball team I think.

Yup, then we might know each other.

I'll let u know if I go to another Long Beach State party. Do you know G. Love?

The Lakewood Towne Center was my home.

I grew up in Long Beach. If you went to Long Beach Wilson and graduated class of '04, I wouldn't be shocked if I knew you.

Cibernetico

Depends on where you live in Cali and what your schedule is like, because it's going to get super busy in the Fall. We're working on 11 TV shows

Con-den-sation

She didn't impress me at all, she did slightly better than her last films but I can only assume it has to do with it being a musical, which is right up her alley.

Okay, a few of my boys at work have this little bet going. We just finished working on and watching Dreamworks "Dreamgirls" which features Beyonce, Jamie Foxx, Danny Glover, Eddie Murphy among others and it's supposedly coming out during the same week as Rocky Balboa (save for release date changes), so we're wondering who will take the top spot. I know it's months away from being significant, but I'm going with Rocky Balboa just because of the nostalgia factor. That and Dreamgirls is Chicago meets Rent (a 3 hour musical) and may be Rated R (the F bomb was dropped frequently). Few of my boys think otherwise, claiming it wil be a draw for the African American community. Being african american (or half anyway), I can't envision black teens going to see this movie. My votes for Rocky.

shaft