SJL Crimson Card (7/21/2002)

[Guest HVilleThugg]

SJL Crimson

The Card

Venue: The Lawn, Woodbridge Virginia

Due Date: 3pm Eastern Time, Sunday, July 21st

 

A ring and 100,000 thousand seat bleachers have been erected on The Lawn following Mr. G’s buge birthday blowout. This will be the only time JLers will be allowed on The Lawn. Treat this as if it were an outdoor arena.

 

Note: Send everything of importance about this Crimson and/or regarding Metal to Crusen86, as he will be posting this show and booking Metal. That is all.

 

PROMO

Renegade!!

- We’ll hear from our new World Champion, Renegade!

 

Singles Match - #1 Contendership to the SJL Television Title

“Hollywood” Spike Jenkins vs. Kamikaze

- On Wrathapalooza, Kamikaze made his impressive debut, picking up the win over the always formidable (*snicker*) Cutthroat. For actually showing up for this show, he has been a awarded a #1 contenders match for the coveted TV title. In order to get his shot though, he must first go through Hollywood, in the form of Spike Jenkins.

- Word Limit: 3500

- Send to Edwin MacPhisto

 

No-DQ Singles Match

T-Bone vs. Mike Van Siclen

- MVS made his return on Wrath, where he joined the reformed sWo! In the process, he threw T-Bone in the empty pool, obviously upsetting the steak sauce covered bastard. He wants MVS, and he’ll get him with no disqualifications. What will happen when T-Bone gets his hands on MVS? And how will the rest of the sWo effect this match with no DQs? Should be an awesome bout!

- Match Description: DQs and count-outs are not in effect. Pinfalls, submissions, and KOs must take place in the ring.

- Word Limit: 4000

- Send to Suicide King

 

Singles Match

Silent vs. Sydney Sky

- Sydney Sky returns to the SJL this Saturday, but what she returns to is not pretty. Silent’s an evil, dark SOB who’s got some serious issues. Will he take them out on Sky, or will the SJL Diva make the silent one scream out in pain? (yeah…ok…can you say random match?)

- Word Limit: 4500

- Send to Thoth

 

Singles Match - #1 Contendership to the SJL European Title

Fugue vs. Thor

- Both Fugue and current TV champion, Thor, have been impressing as of late…so they will duke it out with a shot at T-Bone’s European title on the line. Will the Norse god show that he is indeed from the heavens? Well, he’ll need all his godly powers to get past the awesome Fugue!

- Word Limit: 5000

- Send to Longdogger_Pete

 

MAIN EVENT

Steel Cage Match

“The Franchise” Mak Francis vs. C.I.A.

- Tons of history in this match, as these two had all kinds of matches during the early stages of their careers. CIA is coming off a tough loss to Renegade on Wrath for the world title, but he hopes to bounce back against a familiar foe. Francis has made it his mission to rebuild the sWo and take the SJL by storm. Taking out CIA would be a huge step in the right direction for “The Franchise”. Which one of these familiar enemies will escape the cage??

- Match Description: DQ’s, countouts, pinfalls, submissions, and KOs are not in effect. Once both men are inside the cage, the door will be closed, with the only way to open it being with a key held by the ringside referee. The only way to win the match is to escape over the top of the cage, with BOTH feet hitting the floor.

- Word Limit: 5500

- Send to Edwin MacPhisto

[Guest kelloggs]

IT'S THE LAWN! JD's gonna bust a nut in anger!

 

Rene will speak on the lawn...but one question are soap boxes already on the LAWN.

 

random match...what random match

 

3 of the 4 sWo members up and down the card. We're on our way. Will there be more to come...probably not...

 

And oh hell you know I've got to win this one. To defeat my arch nemisis in a cage of STEEL~! Or will he bounce back after his loss to the man Renegade. I shall try hard to impress...if only to become gopher of the lawn but it's against my man CIA for crying out loud.

 

Bizzangin' card Thugg. You are the shit and rule the lawn with an iron fist.

 

M. "Going smiley faces crazy" Francis B)

 

And a ninja bump for good luck

 

PS lovin the detail match summaries before and after da show.

[Guest Ironman]

No match? No matter.

 

Just more time to hang around in chat and pretend to not be a n00b.

 

Maybe I should attack Ben Hardy..

[Guest crusen86]

Nice. I like. I'm posting, yo.

[Guest -Cutthroat-]

Hmm, not too bad...

[Guest HVilleThugg]

Sorry Ironman, I didn't know whether or not you were ready to be booked or not. You will absolutely, positively be booked on Metal, I promise!

 

Da "quimsical bastard" H

[Guest Ironman]

I don't care. It's just more free time.

 

Plus, I think Crusen read my match after this was posted or right when it was.

[Guest SupaTaft]

Good card. Should be a lot of fun to read.

 

Just a question though. Is MVS vs T-Bone for the Euro? Or non title?

 

Just thought they might like to know as well.

 

-Taft

[Guest Renegade]

No-DQ Singles Match

T-Bone vs. Mike Van Siclen

There you go

[Guest SupaTaft]

QUOTE (HVilleThugg @ Jul 16 2002, 11:12 PM)

No-DQ Singles Match

T-Bone vs. Mike Van Siclen

 

 

There you go

__________________________________________

 

That tells me nothing. It just says that its a no-dq match. Says nothing about the title.

[Guest Ironman]

I think it would say title if it was. On show cards, they usually take any opportunity to advertise a title match.

 

But that's WWE...

[Guest Renegade]

QUOTE (HVilleThugg @ Jul 16 2002, 11:12 PM)

No-DQ Singles Match

T-Bone vs. Mike Van Siclen

 

 

There you go

__________________________________________

 

That tells me nothing. It just says that its a no-dq match. Says nothing about the title.

Urgh if it was a title match it would say so after No DQ...sheesh.

[Guest hhh6294]

QUOTE (HVilleThugg @ Jul 16 2002, 11:12 PM)

No-DQ Singles Match

T-Bone vs. Mike Van Siclen

 

 

There you go

__________________________________________

 

That tells me nothing. It just says that its a no-dq match. Says nothing about the title.

Urgh if it was a title match it would say so after No DQ...sheesh.

Exactly... listen to "gade... he knows what he's talking about.

 

if it was a title match, it would say. If it doesn't say, don't assume. Just go with it.

[Guest HVilleThugg]

It is NOT a title match! When it is a title match, the match title would read something like

 

No-DQ Singles Match for the European Title

Mike Van Siclen vs. T-Bone

 

Da "remember it beeatch" h

[Guest BigTim2002]

This will be my third time on the lawn...YAY!

[Guest SupaTaft]

And Thugg is the only one that explained it properly. Thanks Thugg.

 

*marks out at his temporary permitance on the lawn*

[Guest Ironman]

I take that as an insult, you slut.

 

*goes back to chat mumbling something*

[Guest SupaTaft]

And I've pissed off another one...

[Guest kelloggs]

Yeah he takes that as an insult, you slut...

 

Tis funny that Thor shall force all'th the newest of n00b's to ban together'th in hatred of him. JLCC shall book thee a match with OOC heat so that we can all laugh at the comments..................'th.

 

M. "Is still a n00b but doesn't dislike Thor...too much" Francis j/k

 

I think we should lay off the man and play nice like Thugg said. I can kiss ass, plugging Thugg and get ahead in the race for admittance into the lawn at the same time.

 

Paid for by Mak Francis for lawn gopher.

[Guest Ironman]

Heh. I call many people sluts, you slut.

 

And if you didn't understand it the way I put it, it's an insult to thineself, yo.

 

Common sense = (Y)

 

Or something...

[Guest ScorpionDanceofDeath]

Kinda like how I call all of my friends bitches. I haven't called anyone here a bitch yet, because it'd probably be taken wrong.

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

Thor is a Slut Bitch Cock Sucker.....

 

 

 

Hmmmm, should stop doing that, eh?

[Guest Ironman]

Nah man, drive it 'til it gets old.

 

Wait..

 

Oh and edit your damn sig. I'm sure there are smaller pics of Steph with more boobie showing.

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

Steph needs a big pic damnit!

[Guest kelloggs]

Holly-WOOD you made a funny but I do think he's had enough. If you read this Thor just PM him an apology or something to end the OOC heat.

 

And...

 

Hey n00b I might mark for your stats but don't you disrespect me. Pfft, are you joke callin' me a slut like your my friend, slut? Your ball sack needs to drop before you bring words to da Franchise...........slut j/k

 

PS still can't wait for your first match. It better be good.

 

M. "Disses the n00b even though he's still one" Francis

[Guest Ironman]

Heh.. How old are you, son? 15? 16? Did your voice just crack?

 

I'm probably the oldest guy around or one of them.

 

As if you care, I'm 28. Don't laugh or I'll break out my cain and tan your hide.

 

Damn whippersnappers.

[Guest kelloggs]

Son? SON?!

 

Bah I called him out and then shut me up.

 

I'm a lowly college sophomore at 18. Young to you and to be a sophomore I know but...

 

M. "At least I'm not a 28 year old whose balls haven't dropped yet" Francis

 

Yes, regained my heat. I'm the SJL version of Bubba Dudley...my heat must be protected at all costs.

[Guest Ironman]

28-year-old whose balls haven't dropped? Explain how I tea-bagged yer mum.

 

Tally 2 points for me. 1 from the mum joke and 2 for the use of the phrase 'tea-bagging' with a sexual meaning.

 

You did gave me a good laugh but I'm gonna wrap this up. Besides, I can't be taking shit from a kid with no hair on his ass.

[Guest Edwin MacPhisto]

::Edwin walks into his office scribbling on a notepad and grinning wildly. He puts the pad down on his desk and darts off to mix a drink. We zoom in on the pad...::

 

"PUSH IRONMAN TO MAIN EVENT IMMEDIATELY--GIVE TEABAGGING GIMMICK"

 

 

P.S.: Spike, you should make Steph smaller, but find yourself some more Avril Lavigne. Sure, she's an average-talent guitar-rocker chick, but man, that's a sexy tie.

 

Oh, and: this will be a good card. Yeeeeeeees. Especially looking at the cage match as perhaps the thing that vaults Mak and CIA into superstardom for good.

[Guest HVilleThugg]

Oldest....I think not!

 

I do believe that Mark Stevens is older than you. But then again, he's not an active competitor...so you may well be the oldest active competitor we have.

 

Da "oldest 22 year old you'll ever meet" H