What The Internet Has To Say About The SWF...

[Guest crusen86]

I'm not the internet. I'm a messenger...

 

 

"Edwin MacPhisto is the most overrated worker in north American history. He hads next to no technical skills, and only got where he is now by his backstage relationship with the SWF's own "kliq". It consist of Edwin, Mark Stevens, Xstasy, The Suicide King and the HVilleThugg. Now that they are gone, for now at least, expect Edwin to hold down all rising talent for the next few years to maintain his position.

 

However, when Edwin is ready, it is believed that he will ensure that nobody other than Ash Ketchum becomes the World champion in his place. He is rumoured to be considering joining the booking committee of both the SJL and SWF once this happens.

 

Apparently, Edwin wanted his theme music to be It's Raining Men instead of Battleflag, but the road agents advised against it, explaining to Edwin that it was considered a gay anthem. Edwin was rather shocked when he learned this.

 

Edwin MacPhisto constantly denies these claims, although many backstage sources indicate otherwise.

 

Thoth, now an SWF superstar, as some may remember, was an IGNML jobber in it's later stages, losing matches to such no names as Lucky. Thoth was so unhappy with this, he threatened to kill the entire backstage staff if he wasn't pushed. Months later, he was in the SWF.

 

A former IGNJL prospect, Crow, was very close to being accepted into the IGNJL at one point. However, when he showed up to what was to be his dark match extremely high, he was promptly thrown out of the building, and had his reputation destroyed by IGNJL staff on the internet. It remains a mystery to this day why Crow was thrown out, yet Jay Dawg was kept on despite continued alcoholism to this day.

 

Andrew Loire, an underappreciated talent, is the most obvious example of the glass ceiling, so to speak. He had a solid ICTV reign after a year of being in the league, yet his continued losses to both Edwin MacPhisto and Fallout showed that Edwin was afraid of his potential, and let him rise no higher than the ICTV belt. As a result, Sacred mysteriously left the company.

 

Chris Wilson is widely regarded as being one of the best contributors to the SWF writing committee, often showing the actual writers ideas much better than their own. However, due to claiming that he had more than enough heat to justify his reign as champion to go longer than a month, he was fired. He has only recently returned, as Edwin recognised his writing abilities. Edwin has made sure he will go nowhere though.

 

El Luchador Magnifico's real name is unknown. Why? Because he is indeed an illegal immigrant from Mexico, residing in America with a false identify provided by the SWF. The immigration department is desperately trying to prove it, but the SWF has covered it's tracks too well.

 

Aside from Edwin, the HVille Thugg was regarded as the biggest power backstage. He is regarded as being responsible from turning Magnifico from World title fodder to no more than LHW material. However, Magnifico doesn't care. It is rumoured he said "Well, fuck you Damien - at least down here I don't have to carry your fat ass to a good match". Magnifico kept his job by threatning to expose the SWF's immigration "tactics" if he was released.

 

Outcast, who was considered to be the best wrestler and surefire guy for the World title in the coming months in early 2001 was immediately put down due to a cronic back injury. However, many consider the injury was no accident, and that Rane and PDS demanded that nobody should threaten them. He was placed in a match to lose his ICTV title to Mercury, where he was original scheduled to make a World title run. However, Mercury made sure he wouldn't be coming back anytime soon...

 

Speculation has it that Annie Eclectic's recent abscene from the company was due to constant sexual harrassment from Jay Dawg. She became so frustrated at the company's lack of action she decided to take a break. To this day, no action has been taken against Jay Dawg.

 

Apparently, Perfect Bo's retirement was caused due to differences with the HVille Thugg, and several backstage brawls between them. No other information is known, although speculation is that Thugg was jealous of Bo's superior in ring abililty.

 

The Boston Strangler is currently working through a trial, where he is claimed to have murdered a women in Boston. Due to lack of evidence, he is expected to be let off shortly.

 

Chris Raynor's "SMASH!" gimmick was extremely popular. It started because Edwin advised the booking committee that Chris was indeed quite stupid. Raynor still hasn't quite caught on."

 

 

And that's all for now from the internet. When they contact me again I'll be sure to post more.

[Guest Crowe]

Pfft, I'm telling you! I work better when I'm fucked!

 

 

Crowe

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

"Speculation has it that Annie Eclectic's recent abscene from the company was due to constant sexual harrassment from Jay Dawg. She became so frustrated at the company's lack of action she decided to take a break. To this day, no action has been taken against Jay Dawg."

 

"It remains a mystery to this day why Crow was thrown out, yet Jay Dawg was kept on despite continued alcoholism to this day."

 

 

 

 

I Rule! (Y)

[Guest Ironman]

LMAO!!!

[Guest Tyler McClelland]

Hmm...

 

My part almost makes sense... blame Drew... yeah, that's it...

 

No way in hell am I posting his LMS RP for him!

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

Get off this lawn, Outcast.

[Guest chirs3]

Chris Raynor's "SMASH!" gimmick was extremely popular. It started because Edwin advised the booking committee that Chris was indeed quite stupid. Raynor still hasn't quite caught on."

 

Caught on to what?

[Guest Tyler McClelland]

JD... you don't even have a lawn to be telling people to exit.

[Guest Ironman]

Chris Raynor's "SMASH!" gimmick was extremely popular. It started because Edwin advised the booking committee that Chris was indeed quite stupid. Raynor still hasn't quite caught on."

 

Caught on to what?

 

*chuckle*

[Guest Tyler McClelland]

CHUCKLE SMASH SMASH CHRIS!

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

Turns out the lawn is really Outcast's BUTT fucking Bady Bunch.

[Guest Tyler McClelland]

I think you need to calm down, JD.

 

(hey, I brought back another classic!)

[Guest Edwin MacPhisto]

So sue me, people! The song's catchy, dammit!

 

Hallelujah, it's rainin' men...::flashes Cliq sign::

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

Fuck calming down!

 

 

You be gayer then that announcer and that lesbian chick who I sexually harassed on out of here!

[Guest Tyler McClelland]

I won't even justify that with a response.

 

I've been through more girls than you've even dreamed about.

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

Sure you did...

 

 

so your needle dick popped them right? I mean they are blowup dolls... right?

[Guest Tyler McClelland]

No.

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

When you say No, you really mean yes. Nobsucker!

[Guest HVilleThugg]

Holds up Cliq sign...

 

Wooo! I'm in the Cliq...successfully holding people down since June 2001! Hey now...I may have pushed ELM back down to the bottom of the perverbial barrell, but he never carried me dammit!!

 

 

 

...oh wait...you're referring to the fact that I'm only capable of matches that go something like this...punch, punch, kick, no sell, kick, punch, no sell, interference, Untamed, 1...2...3! Hey now! I remember that I had some matches with this guy named Axis, where I was forced to carry his sorry ass...geez he was bad!

 

Everyone cry for Sacred, for his is truly a sad story.

 

Fuck Bo! Yeah, I whooped his ass a few times backstage. He was talking shit about how he was being held down and that he was better than me and how he should be champion, and not just a main event jobber. I had to set his ass straight. I thought we were cool though during our last program, but apparently, he still harbored some resentment from me beating his ass, because it's his fucking super stiff chair shots to my neck that put me on the shelf. But that's cool, cause now I'm really on the booking committee, so it'll be much easier to see that he goes no where if he returns.

 

BTW, The SWF's version of The Cliq....HAHAHAHA...wonderful! That's so funny because me and Mark Stevens were talking about that a little while ago on AIM, saying howit's funny that all the people who were main eventing in the past 6 months just happened to flock together into a group that became friends. I remember not quite being able to put it into words, but Crusen just put it perfectly. If there were a Cliq, then that would surely be it...

 

BTW, I think Crusen's just mad because I made fun of him in chat about how I beat him when I was a JLer....HAHAHAHAHAHA!! What ever happened to Zio Crusen?? Where's he at now?

 

And since I did such a good job holding people down when I was active, I'm on the booking team now...set to hold everyone down and push Lerrin Breggan!!

 

Da "biggest, baddest" H

[Guest chirs3]

Which one of them is Scott Hall?

[Guest Grand Slam]

he he he ... Kliq...

 

Well let's see, I think its obvious King is Shawn Micheals and Thugg is Kevin Nash (with three more moves). I guess I would be Triple H. X makes sense for Hall for no other reason than the four million drug references. I guess that leaves Edwin to be a super-over version of X-Pac, but don't hold that against him.

 

[Guest HVilleThugg]

Actually, I think that X would be X-Pac...and no, not for the X in his name, but because he's the one that always bitches about things...hee hee. He's the groups whiner. lol...

 

Edwin can be Scott Hall since he drinks a lot...Mark, you can be the good version of HHH, not the crappy one that's been there the last few months.

 

Yeah...or maybe we can be ourselves and just have a better version of the Kliq...one that's much better at holding the other talent down. I mean seriously...there's no reason that the Kliq should have let Benoit, Rock, Angles, Guerrero, or RVD move anywhere but down...See, we'd be much better at it. Look what we did to Sacred and Bo...hee hee!

 

Da "ouch, my quad" H

[Guest redbaron51]

I think Crusen was very bored...

[Guest Muzz]

Pfft, I'll be back, and now I'm annoyed.

[Guest HVilleThugg]

HAHAHAHA!!

 

Yeah, you'll come back and I'll keep holding you down!!! HAHAHAHA!!

 

*thinks to self...if I keep pissing him off, he'll have to come back just to spite me*

 

Yeah Muzz...I'll hold you down for all eternity!!!! MUWHAHAHAHA!!

 

Da "now with booking power" H

[Guest Muzz]

[Jedi Mind Trick] You won't hold me down, you all love me. [/Jedi Mind Trick]

[Guest BigTim2002]

Muzza...I'm with everyone when I say...

 

What the fuck was that?

 

I GET THE REFERENCE...but...QUE?

[Guest HVilleThugg]

I love Sacred....

 

*shakes head violently*

 

DON'T DO THAT!! You know I hate it when you use that damn jedi shit on me....UGH!

 

Da "darth ghetto" H

[Guest Muzz]

...

 

I won't bother.

[Guest HVilleThugg]

Yeah....you better not beeatch! Cause you know that the Kliq will never let you suceed if you do.

 

Da "speaks for all" H