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Evil Ex's.


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Guest Kotzenjunge
Posted

This girl was so aggressive, it's really her fault more than mine. I was forced into doing that!

 

It wasn't pleasant at all, let me tell you. Everyone knows how bad it was...

 

Hell, she pretty much assumed herself on me, I never asked her out or anything, it was almost as if she said "okay, we're going out now, and you'd better like it." Sure, I like it until you drop the L-bomb, psycho!

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

Guest massivHEDtrauma
Posted

I think it must be clarified that Kotzen did not actually meet this girl on the internet, they had known each other for a good long while and dated after me and the girl broke up. I think I broke her, because she wasn't nearly this idiotic while I was dating her. Whatever. She can quote Vonnegut to her heart's content, it doesn't make her any less of a total fucking moron in reality. I hate how people use their likes and dislikes to fool people into believing they're intelligent. Intelligence is intelligence, no matter what you read/watch/listen to/look like, and dammit, you can't decide if someone is smart until you meet and are in contact with them for at LEAST 15 minutes. That's my stance on the matter anyways.

Guest justsoyouknow
Posted

hmmmm....Kotz, I recommend keying her best friend's car, then throwing a brick through her car windshield.

 

Seriously, though, a wiseman once said "Bitches ain't nothin' but tricks and hoes"....it was a black man who rapped. Any ideas on that one?

Guest Smell the ratings!!!
Posted

A black man that rapped, you say...

 

anyway, my real motives were to use that "bad chemicals" line. But, judging by my experience with crazy people, she may suddenly decide to do the noble thing and help you be a better person. Be on the look out for a totally unexpected generous gesture soon. And not "nice" generous, more like "kissing you while her boyfriend's in the bathroom and then making googly eyes at you all night" generous.

 

I hope for all our sakes I am wrong.

 

Good Luck! :(

Posted
This girl was so aggressive, it's really her fault more than mine. I was forced into doing that!

 

It wasn't pleasant at all, let me tell you. Everyone knows how bad it was...

 

Hell, she pretty much assumed herself on me, I never asked her out or anything, it was almost as if she said "okay, we're going out now, and you'd better like it." Sure, I like it until you drop the L-bomb, psycho!

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

Does love scare you? Or was it the " I Love You" in the Fear/SwimFan type?

Guest Kotzenjunge
Posted

She said it the second day we were together, so yes, it was frightening.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

Posted

Ahh... but did you take advantage of the "love" for a little bit of Little Kotzen love?

Guest Kotzenjunge
Posted

I took advantage in that I didn't squash it, yes.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

Guest Will Scarlet
Posted

I had an ex once who dead set on marrying me a week after her and I started dating. In fact, she dumped me after I was unsure about wanting to marry her. She freaked me out. She was a total stalker type.

Guest Mr. Pink
Posted

Kotz, you are my god!

 

 

 

My girlfriend and I just recently went through a HORRIBLE break-up, where she basically told everyone I tried to rape her. Stupid bitch. Thankfully, nobody believed her because of her past record.

 

 

 

 

Scary part: She started showing up where myself and my new girlfriend were...she would just walk up to me and brush against me/hug me/wink at me...scary, scary "SwimFan"-ish bitch

Guest Kotzenjunge
Posted

Yeah, she's a total slut, so no one would take her side on the sex thing.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

Guest Mr. Pink
Posted

Same here, jigga...

 

 

 

and might I add, Kylie Minouge is the second most beautiful woman in the world.

 

 

First is Jessica Alba :D

Guest El Psycho Diablo
Posted

From my own experience: Most people are bastards. The only good ones are the ones you can't have.

Guest Kotzenjunge
Posted

Oops, I seem to have depressed everyone.

 

I only wanted to make people laugh!!! AGH!!

 

(cries)

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

Guest papacita
Posted

Kotzenjunge, if it makes you feel better, I've only attempted suicide twice since the start of this thread.

 

::shrugs::

Posted

How hard could it possibly be to kill yourself? If you can't manage that then you really are a failure in life. :P

Guest massivHEDtrauma
Posted
Kotz, you are my god!

Ah ha! Another recruit into the Hare Kotzen movement! All praise be to Kotzenjunge!

Guest El Psycho Diablo
Posted

Wait..is this Kotz movement like a cult?

Guest Kotzenjunge
Posted

I hope not. I do know that if we get ten people, the government recognizes us as a religion though.

 

Maybe this will be like the State, except I'm God this time as opposed to Maximum Proconsul.

 

Whod've thunk that Nellie could make something like an E-religion happen?

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

Guest Kotzenjunge
Posted

Well, we could be a cult, I suppose. It'd mean I'd have tighter control over my subjects...

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

Guest massivHEDtrauma
Posted

I'm Pope! Yay! Pope HED I! Kiss my ring, dammit!

Guest Kotzenjunge
Posted

Boy, that was unexpected. I didn't know we even had religious people among us, let alone a minister.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

Posted

Umm... I don't work at a church. I am ordained by a church though. Besides do you think they would let me get away with my title?

Guest papacita
Posted
I could make the Kool-Aid. Extra sugar. ^_^

Nectar of the Gods, man! Nectar of the Gods!

Posted
I could make the Kool-Aid.  Extra sugar. ^_^

Nectar of the Gods, man! Nectar of the Gods!

And here I was thinking it was Tang.

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