Guest MrRant Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Brothers and Sisters! Today is the Holy Day of Football. Today we shall gaze lovingly at the cheerleaders snack trays while directing the cameraman to the correct angles to film this truly wonderful exhibition of hooters. Yes we shall consume in great quantities Weenie Tots and cool beer in the name of our savior Al Bundy. Of course we cannot mention Al Bundy and beer without telling a story of His triumph. Yes... not long ago a heathen by the name of Marcy Darcy tried to get the beautiful women who posed for beer ads taken away because of her belief in the bastard religion called "feminism". Yes, twas a dark day in the life of NO MA'AM and men around the world until He arose to the challenge. In a mighty battle Al and his NO MA'AM brethren defeated Marcy and her fellow chickens. That is why today we have supermodels telling us how cool we will be if we drink beer instead of some cud chewing, flannel wearing, truck driving hoss of a woman. So when you are downing that most glorious of drinks remember this saying from Him: " Pretty women make us BUY beer.... Ugly women make us DRINK beer." And know I end this Sermon with a Hymn: at the nudie bar where you can look at a thigh and blacken an eye at the nudie bar at the nudie bar where they show you their BUTT and their trap stays shut at the nudie bar at the nudie bar where you can't touch a breast but you can cave in a chest, at the nudie bar at the nudie bar where the girlies dance in their underpants at the nudie bar at the nudie bar Where the music stinks, and they water the drinks. The nudie bar at the nudie bar Where the beer gives you gas But the Bundy's KICK ASS. the nudie bar at the nudie bar Where Christmas is nice And lap dances are half price at the nudie bar at the nudie bar Where you drink down the shooters and unwrap the hooters at the nudie bar at the nudie bar Where egg nog's a plenty and the girls are all 20 at the Nudie bar Amen. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest TheRockIsTheEuropeanChampion Report post Posted September 8, 2002 ... Will you take me to a nudie bar now, Reverend? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MrRant Report post Posted September 8, 2002 If thou wishes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest TheRockIsTheEuropeanChampion Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Well then, will you get me a fake ID and sneak me into a nudie bar? The rabbi is sadly underage. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest El Psycho Diablo Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Fake ID's: $10 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest TheRockIsTheEuropeanChampion Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Would you lend me ten American dollars, Apostle? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest El Psycho Diablo Report post Posted September 8, 2002 ..the Apostle, good person though he is, gives away nothing. However, he will forgive you if you rob a bank, and donate 40% to the church. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest TheRockIsTheEuropeanChampion Report post Posted September 8, 2002 It is done. What Utah church has the most money?... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MrRant Report post Posted September 8, 2002 *coughRobKarlMalonecough* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest TheRockIsTheEuropeanChampion Report post Posted September 8, 2002 I think I'm ready to do my master's work. In the name of Bundy, I shall return here with $60 !!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Cancer Marney Report post Posted September 8, 2002 ... Will you take me to a nudie bar now, Reverend? <blinks> Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MrRant Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Have you foresaken NO MA'AM Marney? Do you not want to follow the glorious path any more? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Cancer Marney Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Al forbid, Reverend. The girl came back last night and she was reading a couple of CE posts; I temporarily changed the avatar to show it to her. My wimple's on again now. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MrRant Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Ah.. good The Mother Superior has rejoined the flock. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MrRant Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Now we must find a way to get Rabbi TRITEC to join us in the Reverend's Chambers. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest TheRockIsTheEuropeanChampion Report post Posted September 8, 2002 I'm on to you, man! I know what's going on! (*runs off to.. find X-Pac or something.*) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Cancer Marney Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Yes, a correction and a... penance is in order. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MrRant Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Yes.. but what type? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest El Psycho Diablo Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Y'know, the leadership in this church is really corrupt. -The Apostle Diablo: Saintly Member of the Church of No Ma'am Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest TheRockIsTheEuropeanChampion Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Apostle, will you save me from their conspiracies? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Kotzenjunge Report post Posted September 8, 2002 The State is well-run and has NO corruption whatsoever, you know... Fo sheez, Kotzenjunge Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest TheRockIsTheEuropeanChampion Report post Posted September 8, 2002 "State", eh?... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest El Psycho Diablo Report post Posted September 8, 2002 (is a member of the State, too) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Kotzenjunge Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Yeah, and our members won't be trying to take advantage of you all the time. Just one rule for females. You are NOT allowed to look better than the First Lady. Fo sheez, Kotzenjunge Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest TheRockIsTheEuropeanChampion Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Score! I'm IN! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Cancer Marney Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Yes.. but what type? You might wish to impose some corporal punishment, Reverend, while I instruct her in the more technical aspects of fine dining. Shall I have a paddle and a bottle of champagne from the vaults sent to your study? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MrRant Report post Posted September 8, 2002 Y'know, the leadership in this church is really corrupt. -The Apostle Diablo: Saintly Member of the Church of No Ma'am Corrupt? Good humored would be more appropiate. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest El Psycho Diablo Report post Posted September 8, 2002 I didn't say corrupt was a -bad- thing, Reverend. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest WukenBloodstar Report post Posted September 8, 2002 You'll go to the nudie bars, we'll beat No Ma'am into the normals head's, who is with us? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Cancer Marney Report post Posted September 8, 2002 <looks up from a mass of about half a dozen nude sisters wearing wimples, high heels, and stockings, and nothing else, every mouth, every tongue caressing some part of her body> It's... mmm... definitely not a bad thing. oooh. You'll get a commendation for that, my daughter. Continue in your... oh, yes... most holy duties. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
