Political humour and the vagaries of Fate

[Guest Cancer Marney]

My party's candidate for Governor of the State of Michigan is called... Dick Posthumus.

 

<sigh>

 

God and the RNC are mocking me.

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

He sounds like one one of the candidates from the Monty Python Silly vs Sensible party election.

[Guest DeputyHawk]

nice. i used to have an english family friend called godfrey heaven. i guess that's only funny with a scottish accent, though.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

You think that's bad... autumn 1999, we wanted to get a state senator elected in Mississippi. No incumbent, and although Mississippi can sometimes be a pretty Democratic state, his district was conservative, and he was much stronger than his opponent. No problem, right? Well, just one.

 

His name is Rich White. For some unfathomable reason, no one caught this.

 

So the first few banner designs read: "Vote for Rich White, Republican."

 

We didn't allow anyone to call him anything but "Richard" for the rest of the campaign.

[Guest MrRant]

tee hee

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

I can't beat these.

 

The only amusingly named British politician I can think of is..um...Virginia Bottomely. Which isn't that amusing.

 

On a totally random sidetrack, what do people here think of PJ O'Rourke?

[Guest kkktookmybabyaway]

Marney, at least your guy's name wasn't Ben Dover...

 

Oh, wait, that's what politicans call taxpayers...

[Guest DrTom]

Pinned, since an election year is bound to stir up the political humor, nifty cartoons, and good old-fashioned attack ads.

[Guest Some Guy]

Am I the only onw who finds it funny that the current adminstration had a Dick, a Bush, and a Colin?

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

I am really not looking forward to running for any kind of office, even though I can't wait to at the same time. Spoon just isn't a marketable name.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Some Guy]

If you were a porn star it would be, but the name would limit you to just one position.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Sadly, this is not really much of an option for me. Well, due to my appearance, maybe Emo porn, if such a thing exists.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Vern Gagne]

My campaign slogan in 2020.

 

 

A perfect vision for the future.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

...dork. <g>

[Guest Phr33k]

I've said it before, I'll say it again: Former Mayor of Calgary Al Duerr. Then some woman named Bev Longstaff wanted to succeed him. I'm thankful we got Bronco instead.

[Guest Vern Gagne]

...dork. <g>

Will you still vote for me!

[Guest Cancer Marney]

If you'll force Congress to make it a felony crime to be fat. That way we can not only beautify the nation, we can also expel and arrest at least 80% of the House and 90% of the Senate. Merely a step towards progress, you say? True, but a good first step.

[Guest J*ingus]

::whacks Marney with his belly::

[Guest Cancer Marney]

<skips out of the way> Whoa there... you have 18 years to get in shape. <g>

[Guest Vern Gagne]

If you'll force Congress to make it a felony crime to be fat. That way we can not only beautify the nation, we can also expel and arrest at least 80% of the House and 90% of the Senate. Merely a step towards progress, you say? True, but a good first step.

You've got yourself a deal. I'll need V.P. and good campaign manager.

[Guest Some Guy]

If you chose Marney as your running mate then you'd have my vote and then I'd kill you to make Marney President.

[Guest Vern Gagne]

If you chose Marney as your running mate then you'd have my vote and then I'd kill you to make Marney President.

*Gulp*

[Guest Powerplay]

My party's candidate for Governor of the State of Michigan is called... Dick Posthumus.

 

<sigh>

 

God and the RNC are mocking me.

JESUS CHRIST, YOU LIVE IN MICHIGAN!!! God, so do I. I dunno why that strikes me as freaky, but I guess I always pictured you more of an East Coaster or someone somewhere else. Very odd, but I think I can maybe get a better understanding of you.

 

On the Dick Posthumus side: Hey, sorry, but he's gonna have his ass handed to him by Granholm. Hell, Bonior stood a damn good chance of beating him (I won't go as far to say Blanchard had a chance, though). Being associated with John Engler (Someone who has been endlessly demonized by many people) really hurts him, plus being someone who is relatively unrecognized for any of his achievements (I don't know what they are, Marney could you help?) makes him a horrible candidate. Almost a total reverse from John Engler destroying some throw-together Democratic candidate.

[Guest J*ingus]

Actually, having Marney as President would tidily clean up a potentially messy situation for many hardcore conservative fundamentalists: we could have a female Prez, yet still not be forced to invent a male version of the office of First Lady.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Sorry, guys... I'm flattered, but I'm afraid I can't ever run for President or Vice President. <g> I'm American, yes, but I was born in Copenhagen.

[Guest Some Guy]

Plus we'd get HLA in the Oval Office! I want satelite photos!

[Guest Cancer Marney]

I always pictured you more of an East Coaster

I am an East Coaster. <g> I live about 15 minutes away from the EEOB and the White House and 25 minutes from Quantico.

 

Re: Dick Posthumus

I don't know anything about his record; I didn't even know who the Lieutenant-Governor was until I read his name in a memo... I can't tell you anything about his record or his achievements but he has a campaign website here. Whether it's accurate or not I couldn't say.

So a smart, pretty blonde is going to win the governorship instead? Y'know what, I think I can overlook the fact that she's a Democrat. Twist my arm.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

we'd get HLA in the Oval Office!

HLA?

[Guest MrRant]

Hot Lesbian Action

 

Stuff we (including me) would like to see.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

...males. <sigh>