Political humour and the vagaries of Fate

[Guest Cancer Marney]

What the FUCK is he doing?

He's a fakir, and I'm almost 100% certain this is in India (note the sari and the facial features on passersby). Probably demonstrating how long he can stand on his head with minimal oxygen.

[Guest Some Guy]

Interesting. I'd like to see him demonstrate how many bullets he can shoot into his head before dying. It'd make a better show for the kiddies with short attention spans.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

[Germany's Justice Minister] Daeubler-Gmelin gave a different version. She said during a chaotic discussion that touched on Iraq, she had referred to diversionary tactics and had used the words "we know that from our history, since Adolf Nazi." But she denied saying the name Hitler.

AP story

 

~

 

Nice clarification, you worthless, ungrateful little worm... that makes everything so much better.

[Guest McLeary]

Hey, I live in MI, and I'll be voting for the honorable Mr. Deadpenis. It's weird here, because while Engler was quite unpopular with alot of people, he managed to sweep his way to three terms as governor as a Republican in a fairly Democratic state( he does somewhat have to thank poor opposition, though. I mean, GEOFFREY FIEGER? )

 

Anyway, on the subject of political humor and negative ad campaigns, my brother at UConn called me today because he was doing a presentation on the subject for a class called "Effects of Mass Media" and wanted to use a clip of an SNL ad parody as part of the presentation, and needed the me to give hime a copy of it. The bit in question is one of my favorites, so I'll just post it here(credit SNL transcript site):

 

 

 

 

Mack North I

 

Mack North.....Will Ferrell

 

 

 

 

Announcer: Last Tuesday, the people made their decision loud and clear: Mack North beat Fred Peete in the 6th District race by 8%. Fred Peete was the loser, and he will continue to be a loser.

 

Mack North: Hey, Fred - I won, and you lost. Boy, does that feel good!

 

Announcer: Fred Peete has returned to his position as Chairman of the Red Cross. But when a tornado hits your home, do you want to rely on a loser like Fred Peete for food and shelter? Mack North thinks not.

 

Mack North: After he lost the election, I heard he cried with his pastor. [ laughs ] Cried with his pastor?! Meet Fred Peete, professional loser. Hey, you ate it. Now, eat me!

 

Announcer: You lost the election Fred Peete. Now Mack North says, "Eat Me!"

 

[ fade ]

 

Mack North II

 

Mack North.....Will Ferrell

Fred Peete.....Chris Parnell

 

 

 

 

Announcer: Fred Peete lost the election to Mack North, but Mack has got more to say about Fred Peete.

 

Mack North: What are you running from, Fred? A little thing called the truth? You're afraid people might find out you're an idiot? I think the word is out!

 

Announcer: Fred Peete won't respond to the most recent charges. Why? He says the election is "over". He says Mack North is "wasting money". He says he's "out of money". Yet, Fred Peete's kids go to private school, and Fred Peete goes to a chiropractor.

 

Mack North: A chiropractor? No money? Yeah, right. What about the facts? Like the fact that you lost! Like the fact that you're kids are that extra kind of chubby that you just know they're gonna grow up fat! Stop trying to hide behind the Red Cross, Fred Peete!

 

[ Mack North harasses Fred Peete in the parking lot of Target ]

 

Mack North: Hey, Mr. Red Cross, why won't you debate me, huh! You loser! And don't tell me, "Because the election's over!" [ takes Fred's car keys ]

 

Fred Peete: Look, will you please leave me and my family alone! you are a sick man!

 

Mack North: Yeah, I am sick! I'm sick of losers like you, Fred Peete!

 

Fred Peete: Will you please give me my keys back..?

 

Mack North: [ taunting Fred further ] You want you keys? Get your keys! Huh! Get your keys! Get your keys, you little ass!

 

[ Fred manages to get his keys and jumps into his van, crying ]

 

Mack North: Oh, you can drive an Aerostar, but you don't have enough money for commercials, huh? Is that what it is?! Hey, you are a loser! You lost big-time, Fred! You lost! Your little tubby kid -

 

[ Fred drives off in a hurry ]

 

Mack North: [ to his camera crew ] Let's get him! Let's get him!

 

Announcer: Paid for by Mack North.

[Guest Vern Gagne]

SNL had something were Tim Meadows was David Dinkins threatening people on Weekend Update when he lost to Guiliani.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Senate majority leader Tom Daschle (D-SD): "I was very chagrined that the vice president would go to a congressional district yesterday and make the assertion that somebody ought to vote for this particular Republican candidate because he was a war supporter and that he was bringing more support to the president than his opponent."

Again: "That is wrong. We ought not politicize this war. We ought not politicize the rhetoric about life and death."

 

~

 

Excuse me? That is what we should do. That is precisely what we must do. What could be more important than a war? Putting our soldiers in harm's way for a noble cause? It is absolutely vital that we politicise this war, that we tell the American people where we stand as a party, and examine where the Democrats stand as a party.

The issues are clear. Let the positions also be clear, and let the voice of the people be heard.

[Guest Some Guy]

Dascle saying that we shouldn't politicize the war is interesting. Coming from a guy who keeps saying that Bush should do what his father did and build a coalition against Iraq, when he voted against intervention in Kuwait.

You don't suppose that he's changing his tune for political reasons, do you?

[Guest kkktookmybabyaway]

"Dascle saying that we shouldn't politicize the war is interesting. Coming from a guy who keeps saying that Bush should do what his father did and build a coalition against Iraq, when he voted against intervention in Kuwait."

 

I find it funny that someone from the same party that says any opposition to a gvt. program is a threat to THE CHILDREN nationwide would get his panties in a bunch over being accused as a softie on terrorism because he doesn't agree w/ Bush.

 

Karma's a bitch Tom...

[Guest Olympic Slam]

Why shouldn't the war be politicized? This war on terrorism is the most IMPORTANT issue in what, 30 years? By saying the war shouldn't be a political issue, Daschle admits that politics is nothing more than a game at the expense of the American people. Bush and the Republicans have a plan, and an agenda when it comes to this war on terrorism and they have every right to politicize it. Isn't the whole point of becoming an elected official is to deal with the most important issues facing the country? What's the point of doing so if being a politician is nothing more than seccuring votes like Tom Daschle?

 

Daschle is a true phoney, as most Democrats tend to be. He offers NOTHING politically outside of complaining, finger pointing and playing the blame game. Did you ever think Tom that you're worried about November, not because Bush is politicizing the war, but because you've shown who you really are. An anti-American, one world socialist that's afraid to admit it. The right is at the forefront of the most important American issue in decades, you're not! Either get on board with the right, or take your chances with your meager "kitchen table issues" at the polls this November. And if you and your party fail to get it done, don't blame the right and this so called "exploitation," blame yourselves for being who you are.

[Guest Vern Gagne]

Notice any Democrat up for reelection is backing away from giving his or her true feelings on Iraq known. Paul Welfare who voted against the war the last time isn't speaking out against it even though he's a bleeding heart.

[Guest NoCalMike]

The point is, Bush was trying to say that just because you don't agree with his exact plan of war, you must not care about homeland security which is just a horrid statement. I could care less about who apologizes to who because this has been blown way out of proportion in the last day or two, but the statement should never have been made.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Bah. First of all, the President didn't say anything of the sort, and second, he would have been correct even if he had. It's the Democrats who are playing politics, and they don't even have the guts to admit it.

[Guest NoCalMike]

"it's the Dems" haha, well to say the least it is BOTH sides. Both sides are basically the same. The political arena is one big cesspool for the most part. Claiming one side is playing more politics than the other is just a waste of time. Both sides are obssessed with bringing down the other.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

We do it on the issues. They do it as a game. There is a huge difference. There has been since, well, FDR. Even JFK (though a goof) stood by his principles of governance and power. Today's Democrats? They couldn't care less about America. Why don't they want to "politicise" the war? That is, make their support for the war an issue in the November elections? Because they KNOW their party line is untenable and foolish, and if we make it an issue, as we should, they'll get their collective ass handed to them on a silver platter.

[Guest Olympic Slam]

We do it on the issues. They do it as a game. There is a huge difference. There has been since, well, FDR. Even JFK (though a goof) stood by his principles of governance and power. Today's Democrats? They couldn't care less about America. Why don't they want to "politicise" the war? That is, make their support for the war an issue in the November elections? Because they KNOW their party line is untenable and foolish, and if we make it an issue, as we should, they'll get their collective ass handed to them on a silver platter.

There's also the whole "team" aspect behind all this. Just because Bush is the president and he's leading the war, the Dems don't want to be fully behind it because he's a Republican. I wouldn't be surprised that if Bush supported National Health Insurance, they'd be against it.

[Guest J*ingus]

Because they KNOW their party line is untenable and foolish,

Marney, you do a lot of name-calling towards the Dems, starting with "evil" and going on from there. You give off the impression of believing that all liberals are knowingly and willfully working for the Dark Side, putting forth idiotic and harmful ideas with full knowledge of what they're doing.

 

Just curious, because reading your posts it seems like you think that the main goal of a liberal is the destruction of the United States, and I was wondering 1.Why you feel that way, or 2.If I was mistaked in my impressions.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Nope, you're not mistaken, and I answered this question already. Last post on this page.

[Guest Vern Gagne]

Liberals today want to completly change what this country was founded on. Blame America first, never dare criticize any minority race or your a racist. In their books the founding fathers evil white men. People should be grateful that these are the men that built this country and not villify them.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Getting on topic of political humor, a local congressional advertisment said, without mincing words, that one candidate wanted to burn the flag, chain children down so they couldn't say the Pledge of Allegieance, and sit with Osama on another plane, if you know what I mean.

 

Aren't they getting a bit out of hand at this point? It should be noted that no advertisments against this candidate have yet noted anything bad he's actually done. Grasping at straws, I think.

 

I mean, the only way one should use patriotism in political advertisments is to endorse themselves perhaps. The republic is greater than any single race, don't flaunt love for it as a tool.

 

Kotzenjunge

Liberal Whore

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Governor JE Bush on the recent Reno/McBride primaries: "What is it with Democrats having a hard time voting... I don't know."

 

No one does, sir. No one does.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

For the wrestling fans here:

 

"My state almost screwing up my brother's election? Whatzupwitdat?"

 

Kotzenjunge

Wasn't Old Enough to Vote for Gore

[Guest Cancer Marney]

A few minutes ago a co-worker told me Senator Max Cleland (D-GA) was talking about "bus security."

I didn't believe her, so I turned on the television. But it was true.

"We need technology to share passenger lists. We need monitoring devices and metal detectors so that 800 million travellers - 800 million, Madame President! - can feel safe and secure on our nation's buses!"

 

...

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

(hides his face at the dumbass Democrat's(!) remarks)

 

Kotzenjunge

Sometimes Not Very Proud of his Party

[Guest Cancer Marney]

"France has huge oil and other commercial interests in Iraq (despite the sanctions). America is working hard to promise the French that if France goes along with its historic ally - I mean America, if you weren't sure - they won't be frozen out of the new Iraqi economic order."

 

- Jonah Goldberg

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Representative Jim McDermott (D-WA): "They said they would allow us to go and look anywhere we wanted, and until they don't do that, there is no need to do this coercive stuff where you bring in helicopters and armed people and storm buildings. I think you have to take the Iraqis on their face value."

"I think the President would mislead the American people."

"The President of the United States will lie to the American people in order to get us into this war."

 

-------

 

Of course, this practically guarantees he'll be re-elected. Even if his district hadn't given him 72% of the vote in November 2000, the Green party got almost 20% and the only other candidate was a Libertarian. Calling the President a liar, denouncing war, and saying the Iraqis are nice honest trustworthy folks? He's set for life. Nothing appeals to liberals more than treason.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

I don't know about that last line there. Saying liberals love treason is a bit much, don't you think?

 

Kotzenjunge

Thought he'd Seen it All

[Guest Cancer Marney]

No.

[Guest Vern Gagne]

How about those NJ Dems replacing the Torch on the ballot when he's going to lose and the NJ Supreme Court allowing it. Even though its against the Law.

[Guest Ken]

Marney's maths:

 

The U.S senate is about 100 members, 50 of which are Democrat, I believe.

 

The population of America is roughly 300 million. So, of America's 300 million population, the 150 million who support the Democrats hate the U.S, and wish for its destruction.

 

Interesting.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

You are completely and totally wrong.

 

You forgot the Libertarians, the Greens, and the Socialists. Not to mention the Communists, the assorted militia/"patriot" groups, the White Nationalists, the anarchists, the fundamentalist Christians, and the "Natural Law" party.